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Author	Topic: HOW TO TREAT ARABIAN MAN
nooralhaq Member Posts: 461 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 30 December 2004 12:17 PM I am a Western woman and would love to get feedback only from Arabian women (or men) on how to treat Arabian men. I am recently married to an Arabian man and try always to make him happy. I have noticed Arabian women (most) have an innate ability to treat their husbands so well and would love some advice. Thank you in advance. Take care. IP: Logged
diana_ivanova Member Posts: 334 Registered: Jul 2004	posted 30 December 2004 12:40 PM IP: Logged
akshar Member Posts: 1337 Registered: Jan 2003	posted 30 December 2004 01:19 PM This website may help you www.marriedtoanarab.com it was written by an Arab woman (someone I know actually) and is very informative IP: Logged
hatshepsut Member Posts: 79 Registered: Jun 2004	posted 30 December 2004 01:20 PM IP: Logged
Samia Member Posts: 1084 Registered: Jul 2004	posted 30 December 2004 01:23 PM IP: Logged
nooralhaq Member Posts: 461 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 30 December 2004 01:45 PM Thank you Askar. Take care. IP: Logged
nooralhaq Member Posts: 461 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 30 December 2004 01:51 PM FYI for any other feed back, my husband and I met in America, married in America and plan to stay here a few more years before returning to his home country of Jordan. I have never been out of the states but we will travel to Jordan next year to meet his family. I am mostly interested in cultural advice that might help me make him and his family happy. Thank you in advance, Take care. IP: Logged
akshar Member Posts: 1337 Registered: Jan 2003	posted 30 December 2004 01:55 PM quote: Originally posted by nooralhaq: FYI for any other feed back, my husband and I met in America, married in America and plan to stay here a few more years before returning to his home country of Jordan. I have never been out of the states but we will travel to Jordan next year to meet his family. I am mostly interested in cultural advice that might help me make him and his family happy. Thank you in advance, Take care. Your best source of information is your husband not only will he know the culture in much more detail but also his family's take on various aspects of the culture. IP: Logged
Natashiah Member Posts: 696 Registered: Jun 2004	posted 31 December 2004 08:29 AM IP: Logged
sonomod Member Posts: 1182 Registered: Mar 2004	posted 31 December 2004 11:15 AM quote: Originally posted by nooralhaq: I am a Western woman and would love to get feedback only from Arabian women (or men) on how to treat Arabian men. I am recently married to an Arabian man and try always to make him happy. I have noticed Arabian women (most) have an innate ability to treat their husbands so well and would love some advice. Thank you in advance. Take care. I was told by my sister-in-law to be my husband's mother, sister, father, brother, cousin, grandparent, be all and everything to my husband. I find that advice a load of crap. I also find the proverb, 'marriage is like a coffin' a load of crap too. Your 'Arab' husband is a man, they cannot articulate emotions and sensitive observations like a woman can. Arab men also don't discuss their complete emotions very well either. Go back into the depths of this forum and read just about every posting. Nothing is directly addressed. You must learn to read between the lines. Start here. Then learn everything you can through books, read online publications on the Mid-East. Plus learning to cook Misryan dishes will help open up your husband past. When I cook a distinctly Misryan dish my husband floods me with tales of his upbringing. My hubby wants to be thoroughly American, I find this need revolting. But then he doesn't want me to respond to him as a Arab man, but an Arab American man. So he hides as much of his Arab sensibilities as he can. Teaching ESL as a volunteer for 3 years I found ways to study a person's culture without asking questions. This insight has helped me alot. Now once in a while when we discuss something of Misryan culture or history he is shocked and a little repulsed. He wants more to discuss American things instead. So the struggle is helped by food and watching Misryan movies together. Good luck, best aid is studying as much in books and on the web as possible. IP: Logged
Suzanna Junior Member Posts: 27 Registered: Dec 2004	posted 02 January 2005 08:29 AM I understand that you only want to here from Arabic women and men on this topic-- but there is valuable information from the women just like you -- I do not mean this in a negative way-- but your life is going to change and there will be a big adjustment when you do move with your husband. He may not even realize it himself but the roles between men and women are manifested differently when living in the Middle East. It is not unsurmountable at all --but-- be realistic--it is different. If you are intersted in hearing from the married western woman to the middle eastern man-- let us know -- and am sure floods of thoughts and suggestions will come forward IP: Logged
Penny Member Posts: 1153 Registered: Mar 2003	posted 03 January 2005 04:32 AM quote: Originally posted by Suzanna: I understand that you only want to here from Arabic women and men on this topic-- but there is valuable information from the women just like you -- I do not mean this in a negative way-- but your life is going to change and there will be a big adjustment when you do move with your husband. He may not even realize it himself but the roles between men and women are manifested differently when living in the Middle East. It is not unsurmountable at all --but-- be realistic--it is different. If you are intersted in hearing from the married western woman to the middle eastern man-- let us know -- and am sure floods of thoughts and suggestions will come forward Very much agree Suzanna, I stayed out as the request was only for comments from Arabic women/men....but probably those of us in cross cultural relationsips understand the problems better about how you adapt to the needs of a different type of man but not loose your own self in the process. IP: Logged
sonomod Member Posts: 1182 Registered: Mar 2004	posted 03 January 2005 08:06 AM quote: Originally posted by Penny: but not loose your own self in the process. Well said Penny. Somehow its easier for the man to have the wife alter herself in everyway imaginable then no longer want her because she isn't the same person he married. And the world thinks women try to change their men? I have seen so many women change everything about themselves in order to please their foreign spouse. It just shows she was lacking something in the first place and wanted an escape hatch. IP: Logged
nooralhaq Member Posts: 461 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 03 January 2005 01:05 PM Yes, I would appreciate any feedback from Western women married to middle-eastern men. I'm sure it would be helpful thank you in advance. Take care. IP: Logged
Penny Member Posts: 1153 Registered: Mar 2003	posted 03 January 2005 02:48 PM quote: Originally posted by sonomod: Well said Penny. Somehow its easier for the man to have the wife alter herself in everyway imaginable then no longer want her because she isn't the same person he married. And the world thinks women try to change their men? I have seen so many women change everything about themselves in order to please their foreign spouse. It just shows she was lacking something in the first place and wanted an escape hatch. Sonm... this is exactly the problem and Nooralhaq this is the mistake I made. Your question is well meaning in wanting to make your husband happy but you could easily make the same mistake. I found myself trying to be what I thought an egyptian woman would be like. You know staying at home, dinner ready on the table, flat immaculate etc etc. As I still work part in Egypt, part in England eventually I was wearing myself out and not happy because it was simply not me. Things came to a head eventually as I am also not much good at the put up and shut up way of life. Now when things come to a head with my husband you sort of know about it Eventually we talked calmly but it was after I had gone back to England and taken a long hard look at things to work out what was going wrong. I phoned him and told him I could not be the sort of woman he wanted me to be, I had to be just me or go mad. His answer was very simple ..he only ever wanted me as just me, the woman he first met and fell in love with. He was so worried about who I was becoming and why if he was busy was I stuck in the flat, instead of out diving, snorkelling, horseriding, climbing a mountain or any of the other daft things I do. He doesn't give a dam if the flat is tidy or there is food on the table the minute he walks in. So a cloud lifted off of me but no it did not just magically all fall into place because there is still a part of me that thinks I need to be doing those things, so on some days yes I still do the things I love plus the things I think I should do. I just end up chasing myself round like a blue arsed fly. My husband never sees all this but he can never understand why I am never ready to go out when he is. The one thing I have learnt about my husband through all this though is that he is happiest when I am happy and thats a nice situation to be in. Penny IP: Logged
nooralhaq Member Posts: 461 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 04 January 2005 09:13 AM Penny, that is lovely. I appreciate that. I believe marriage is give and take, my husband and I have both been married once before. He was married to an Arabian woman, and me to an American man. Nothing is a guarantee. I didn't mean to change myself, that is not my goal, nor to change him. I just wondered what small things make Arabian men happy that I might not be aware of . After all, I know what American men want (not trying to be funny) but Arabian men are very different it seems. However, I love my husband very much and it makes me happy to see him happy. Take care. IP: Logged
Suzanna Junior Member Posts: 27 Registered: Dec 2004	posted 06 January 2005 06:36 AM Just want to respond to Pennys remarks as married to an Egyptian. I, as you, love my husband. I also find myself living a dual lifestyle as both a western woman and a traditional wife. I do not say I struggle but it is a challenge to balance the both sides. I recognize that much of my desire tomaintain both sides is from my own will -- that, just as you Penny discovered-- my husband loves me either way. In a world society when things and people are quickly discarded, I am grateful for the relationship I have-- in which we still grown and discover each other. It is a pleasure to read postings like yours when there are so many that are based on unrealities and fantasies. IP: Logged
Penny Member Posts: 1153 Registered: Mar 2003	posted 06 January 2005 07:50 AM It certainly never gets boring IP: Logged
sonomod Member Posts: 1182 Registered: Mar 2004	posted 05 March 2005 08:25 PM quote: Originally posted by nooralhaq: FYI for any other feed back, my husband and I met in America, married in America and plan to stay here a few more years before returning to his home country of Jordan. I have never been out of the states but we will travel to Jordan next year to meet his family. I am mostly interested in cultural advice that might help me make him and his family happy. Thank you in advance, Take care. Not a good attempt at keeping your online alias straight. How can you get so confused? Author Topic: Anybody know Mohamed Talaat Salama from Menoufia? nooralhaq Member Posts: 278 Registered: Nov 2004 posted 10 November 2004 12:40 PM -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Just wondering if anybody knows a Mohamed Talaat Salama from Shebin EL kom Menoufia, Egypt Just looking for a good character reference. Your help is confidental and appreciated. Thanks! Assalam Alaykom -Nooralhaq http://www.egyptsearch.com/forums/Forum1/HTML/001584.html One day you are looking: nooralhaq Member Posts: 278 Registered: Nov 2004 posted 20 December 2004 01:59 PM -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I would be interested to get more information. How can I contact you? http://www.egyptsearch.com/forums/Forum1/HTML/001704.html For gigilo busters? Oh, is it the El-Menoufia office you are looking for or the Jordan office? Author Topic: Menoufia nooralhaq Member Posts: 278 Registered: Nov 2004 posted 07 December 2004 04:55 PM -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- What can someone tell me about a town called Menoufia? Anything? I am from America so I am not familiar....thank you. IP: Logged sonomod Member Posts: 966 Registered: Mar 2004 posted 13 December 2004 12:47 AM -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- quote: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Originally posted by nooralhaq: What can someone tell me about a town called Menoufia? Anything? I am from America so I am not familiar....thank you. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Menoufia is not a town its like a county; Hennipen county, Ramsey county, Dakota county so forth. District, region whatever. I think they call them provinces in Misr. Menoufia is where my in-laws town lies. It has a huge university that is brand new and many governmental offices. Here's a link to the university site: http://menofia.edu.eg/index.asp IP: Logged nooralhaq Member Posts: 278 Registered: Nov 2004 posted 13 December 2004 09:15 AM -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Great, I know some people in this county, a Salama family. I understand it is about 70 km north of Cairo, thank you for the info. IP: Logged dr_judge Member Posts: 175 Registered: Sep 2004 posted 13 December 2004 03:02 PM -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It is president Mubark Governrate and is a side governerate depend most on agriculture and have a town which is very nice you can enjoy gardens and fresh vegetables IP: Logged sonomod Member Posts: 966 Registered: Mar 2004 posted 13 December 2004 04:17 PM -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Its also the town where Sadat came from. Yes just south of Shebin-El-Kaum is alot of farms. Don't even think of swimming in the Canal or eat the local fish. IP: Logged nooralhaq Member Posts: 278 Registered: Nov 2004 posted 13 December 2004 04:19 PM -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- LOL why not??? And, also what about the people from there? Generally what are the people like? Or are you looking for a realator in Shebin? No way, your fake husband probably wouldn't let you live in the town. A complete shame to his family. IP: Logged
BaBa-Mido Member Posts: 170 Registered: Sep 2003	posted 06 March 2005 01:19 PM quote: Originally posted by nooralhaq: I am a Western woman and would love to get feedback only from Arabian women (or men) on how to treat Arabian men. I am recently married to an Arabian man and try always to make him happy. I have noticed Arabian women (most) have an innate ability to treat their husbands so well and would love some advice. Thank you in advance. Take care. noor allow me to say it in my way ( be kind as his mum, be sexy as his lover and need him as his daughter) IP: Logged
Karah_Mia Member Posts: 966 Registered: Jun 2004	posted 06 March 2005 09:28 PM quote: Originally posted by BaBa-Mido: noor allow me to say it in my way ( be kind as his mum, be sexy as his lover and need him as his daughter) Well said Baba, well said. IP: Logged
sonomod Member Posts: 1182 Registered: Mar 2004	posted 20 April 2005 12:56 AM quote: Originally posted by nooralhaq: FYI for any other feed back, my husband and I met in America, married in America and plan to stay here a few more years before returning to his home country of Jordan. I have never been out of the states but we will travel to Jordan next year to meet his family. I am mostly interested in cultural advice that might help me make him and his family happy. Thank you in advance, Take care. Jordan? IP: Logged
lifeAgift Junior Member Posts: 23 Registered: Apr 2005	posted 20 April 2005 10:12 AM My husband a Muslim from Egypt. I'm an African American. We live in the states for now. During the course of my marriage I have found it takes very little to please my husband. The intent and spirit and way I do things seems more important than what I do. One while I was working a lot of hours and making twice my husbands salary. I thought he would be impressed and enjoy not being stressed financially. Wrong...the money thing was of no consequence. What he wanted was to be able to care for me from a muslim perspective and allow my money to be mine and his to be ours. We've scaled back expenses and now I work less, earn less and enjoy life more. He loved it when I sought out a Middle Eastern store that baked their pita bread fresh daily and sold like 12 different varieties of fava beans. He was elated that I took the time to find and prepare these back home favorites. He also loves when I buy specialty soaps and scrub his back or massage his scalp with Olive Oil. If I make a huge supper with his favorites he is happy. If I make a peanut butter and jelly cut diagnolly and serve it to him on a fancy napkin and kiss him on the forehead, he is ECSTATIC. His face beams with an awesome smile (I think very indicative of egyptian men)and he is so very pleased and responsive to whatever for hours to come. The spirit of what I do is key. I call it cooking and serving with love. IP: Logged
germansara Member Posts: 820 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 20 April 2005 10:19 AM lifesgift, you are wonderful !!! I am doing like you, Allah gives us much Hassanat, inschaallah, and we get already a big 'feedback' from our husbands on earth back... Wish you the best. Sara IP: Logged
nooralhaq Member Posts: 461 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 20 April 2005 11:40 AM quote: Originally posted by sonomod: Jordan? Hi Sono. No he is Egyptian, but I am private (usually) and don't offer particulars except to a few here I know personally. Take care. IP: Logged
nooralhaq Member Posts: 461 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 20 April 2005 11:42 AM quote: Originally posted by lifeAgift: My husband a Muslim from Egypt. I'm an African American. We live in the states for now. During the course of my marriage I have found it takes very little to please my husband. The intent and spirit and way I do things seems more important than what I do. One while I was working a lot of hours and making twice my husbands salary. I thought he would be impressed and enjoy not being stressed financially. Wrong...the money thing was of no consequence. What he wanted was to be able to care for me from a muslim perspective and allow my money to be mine and his to be ours. We've scaled back expenses and now I work less, earn less and enjoy life more. He loved it when I sought out a Middle Eastern store that baked their pita bread fresh daily and sold like 12 different varieties of fava beans. He was elated that I took the time to find and prepare these back home favorites. He also loves when I buy specialty soaps and scrub his back or massage his scalp with Olive Oil. If I make a huge supper with his favorites he is happy. If I make a peanut butter and jelly cut diagnolly and serve it to him on a fancy napkin and kiss him on the forehead, he is ECSTATIC. His face beams with an awesome smile (I think very indicative of egyptian men)and he is so very pleased and responsive to whatever for hours to come. The spirit of what I do is key. I call it cooking and serving with love. This is terrific, inshallah I might learn to cook the food my husband likes. I'm still a little afraid to even try to eat it~ Salaam. IP: Logged
salama Member Posts: 720 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 20 April 2005 11:45 AM [QUOTE]Originally posted by nooralhaq: [B] Hi Sono. No he is Egyptian, but I am private (usually) and don't offer particulars except to a few here I know personally. Take care. And just for a an added nightmare sono, they both are moslims. You will sleep well tonight ! Will you? IP: Logged
1mangang Member Posts: 213 Registered: Jan 2005	posted 20 April 2005 11:56 AM is that nut job sono messing with noor? GIRL you just do not learn> what I cant figure out (salama and sara maybe you can help me with this one) is why sonomook continues to question everything about everyone but not about herself? listen up psycho oops i mean sono, noor is private she has said that before. many of us know her situation. it is YOU nobody can seem to figure out. go home and get slapped by the hubby again. skank. [This message has been edited by 1mangang (edited 20 April 2005).] [This message has been edited by 1mangang (edited 20 April 2005).] IP: Logged
1mangang Member Posts: 213 Registered: Jan 2005	posted 20 April 2005 12:29 PM ok i have a good one: what did sonomods husband say to her when he noticed her black eye? NOTHING HE ALREADY TOLD HER ONCE!! HAHAHAHA! IP: Logged
nevermind Member Posts: 106 Registered: Feb 2005	posted 20 April 2005 12:47 PM Sorry, folks, but I am kind of confused here... First this nooralhaq speaks of going to Jordan to visit her man's family, then she says the man is Egyptian. Do Egyptians then live in Jordan with their families? What makes them Egyptian then? I don't know these arab nations so well so can you please somebody explain? Otherwise we less informed people get a wrong image about a member of this forum who does not seem to know where her male partner lives or what nationality he is that BTW makes a kind of food that this noor is afraid of eating, maybe we should also know to avoid then. IP: Logged
nooralhaq Member Posts: 461 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 20 April 2005 12:49 PM Hi nevermind. When I typed this it was back when I first joined the forum and knew nobody. I did not feel comfortable with saying too much about my husband and in an effort to keep private, I choose Jordan instead (seemed a nearby country). Since that time I have come out to say that my husband is actually Egyptian, and he adds posts here from time to time. Sonomod likes to pull up old posts for reasons not clear to anybody. Take care. [This message has been edited by nooralhaq (edited 20 April 2005).] IP: Logged
salama Member Posts: 720 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 20 April 2005 01:01 PM [QUOTE]Originally posted by 1mangang: [B]is that nut job sono messing with noor? GIRL you just do not learn> what I cant figure out (salama and sara maybe you can help me with this one) is why sonomook continues to question everything about everyone but not about herself? 1mangang, Sono is a very sad person. We all should feel sorry for her. IP: Logged
nevermind Member Posts: 106 Registered: Feb 2005	posted 20 April 2005 01:06 PM Nice and clear, thanks. About Sono - she likes clarity, too, from what I have understood. She's a person with principles! and I happen to like this kind of persons. They may get on nerves sometimes but they are basically good for society :). People here like just nice people who smile and say nice things, but is so often exactly the gruffy people who really care and whom one can really trust. IP: Logged
1mangang Member Posts: 213 Registered: Jan 2005	posted 20 April 2005 01:30 PM I think shes lonely and pathetic myself. IP: Logged
lifeAgift Junior Member Posts: 23 Registered: Apr 2005	posted 20 April 2005 01:56 PM By the way I cook other ethnic foods for hubby too. I even ventured out a couple times to get music for him and Idyl Cursy (sp) art work with the attributes of Allah inscribed. Allah has blessed our marriage incredibly! IP: Logged
germansara Member Posts: 820 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 20 April 2005 02:02 PM Uuups, your husband is not a moslem ? I understood this now wrong ? Sara IP: Logged
Penny Member Posts: 1153 Registered: Mar 2003	posted 20 April 2005 04:03 PM quote: Originally posted by nevermind: Nice and clear, thanks. About Sono - she likes clarity, too, from what I have understood. She's a person with principles! and I happen to like this kind of persons. They may get on nerves sometimes but they are basically good for society . People here like just nice people who smile and say nice things, but is so often exactly the gruffy people who really care and whom one can really trust. LOL Funniest thing I have read on ES in a long time. Don't worry nevermind you will learn...leopards do not change their spots IP: Logged
1mangang Member Posts: 213 Registered: Jan 2005	posted 20 April 2005 04:25 PM Yes Sonomod is douche. IP: Logged
Morgan Member Posts: 158 Registered: Feb 2005	posted 20 April 2005 07:38 PM quote: Originally posted by nooralhaq: Hi nevermind. When I typed this it was back when I first joined the forum and knew nobody. I did not feel comfortable with saying too much about my husband and in an effort to keep private, I choose Jordan instead (seemed a nearby country). Since that time I have come out to say that my husband is actually Egyptian, and he adds posts here from time to time. Sonomod likes to pull up old posts for reasons not clear to anybody. Take care. [This message has been edited by nooralhaq (edited 20 April 2005).] Nothing is clear to you dear, a lonely woman talking wet ur "gost" husband IP: Logged
Alana Member Posts: 135 Registered: Jan 2005	posted 20 April 2005 10:27 PM Morgan, I agree totally. Nooralaq should team up with 1mangang.They both like to "dish" out advice,and condradict themselves. 1mangang portrays himself as such a "prince of words", but has a nasty mouth.He cussed me out on another topic. They are both poor examples of americans. He talks bad about Sonomod, he should read his own posts.What a nasty topic he posted ,filthy words. He is a drunk and has no respect for women.Most people on here don't want to hear about "drunks" throwing up on his floor, and as he puts it ,his friend using his finger somewhere. He is disgusting, and has no room to put someone else down, when he acts like garbage. IP: Logged
Gail Member Posts: 41 Registered: Mar 2005	posted 21 April 2005 08:42 AM Alana, I totally agree with you. Who wants to hear about that stuff? What's the point? He needs to get a life somewhere other than this forum. IP: Logged
nooralhaq Member Posts: 461 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 21 April 2005 08:46 AM I do not know 1mangang. I would not team up with anybody. I doubt my husband would appreciate that IP: Logged
nooralhaq Member Posts: 461 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 21 April 2005 08:53 AM quote: Originally posted by Alana: Morgan, I agree totally. Nooralaq should team up with 1mangang.They both like to "dish" out advice,and condradict themselves. They are both poor examples of americans. Alana I really don't know why you think I am a poor example of an American? I think there are many on this board willing to give out advice, whether or not you think I contradict myself is basically your opinion which you are entitled to the same as me. Quite frankly, I don't know you and you don't know me, why you would assume you know me and my character is outrageous. I have many friends on this board, while 1mangang likes to defend me or others is beyond me and I do not consider myself aligned with him whatsoever. Furthermore, if you are upset because I challenge you on issues then try to be less emotional about your opinion and more logical. Take care. IP: Logged
1mangang Member Posts: 213 Registered: Jan 2005	posted 21 April 2005 10:13 AM quote: Originally posted by Alana: Morgan, He cussed me out on another topic. They are both poor examples of americans. He talks bad about Sonomod, he should read his own posts.What a nasty topic he posted ,filthy words. He is a drunk and has no respect for women.Most people on here don't want to hear about "drunks" throwing up on his floor, and as he puts it ,his friend using his finger somewhere. He is disgusting, and has no room to put someone else down, when he acts like garbage. HOW INCREDIBLE even though i cuss her out and disrespect her she still reads my entire story down to the last word what a gal f**k off alana u skank IP: Logged
nooralhaq Member Posts: 461 Registered: Nov 2004	posted 21 April 2005 10:32 AM quote: Originally posted by 1mangang: HOW INCREDIBLE even though i cuss her out and disrespect her she still reads my entire story down to the last word what a gal fk off alana u skank** 1man, I am the first to disagree with Alana but please try to refrain from this language and insults. Nobody is deserving of it. Thank you. IP: Logged
1mangang Member Posts: 213 Registered: Jan 2005	posted 21 April 2005 11:30 AM quote: Originally posted by nooralhaq: 1man, I am the first to disagree with Alana but please try to refrain from this language and insults. Nobody is deserving of it. Thank you. for you MY APOLOGIES IP: Logged

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