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I ask me this : is problem for egyptian family when their son make marriage with foreigner girl? What do you think for this? how do you think that egyptian family accept this? Somebody have told me that much egyptian boy before make marriage and after they make meet foreigner girl to his family (i don't know if this is true). What do you think? Posts: 98 | Registered: Apr 2004
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Hello, normaly its not a problem. But it dependes on the family if they are very traditional or not. Lok, im going to marry an egyptian girl and at the beginning her parents refused cause its not normaly that an egyptian GIRL marries a foreigner. But after i met her family, everything was okay. Al hamdullela. The traditions are strange at the beginning, but u will get used to this. I guess ur a girl, so respect the traditions and let him buy gold for u ;-)
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Depends on the family, depends on the girl.
the things that families think about is will this girl make our son happy, will she bring up the children as muslims, can she have children, if the marriage breaks down will she take the children away, will she behave respectablly, will she honour the rules of our culture and religion, is she friendly to the family, does she care about my son, will she take him away from Egypt
If they are satisified on all these counts then they will welcome a foreign wife. Some can never be satisified because they believe it is impossible for a foreign wife to adapt to their standards. Others are not so closed and judge on merit.
But when they do welcome you it is lovely, like being wrapped in a snuggly blanket and fed your favourite food. My in laws are wonderful hamduallah
------------------ Jane Akshar UK Co-owner of www.flatsinluxor.co.uk Appartments and Tours in Luxor
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There are strange things in my man....he told me that is not importat for him have or not have children....(I find strange this),he told me that his mother not will be happy for foreigner wife so he prefer before make marriage and after make meet his family (also this is strange for me). He told that for we is better live in my country for work, for have better life....maybe he is sincere but.....there are much strange things.... Posts: 98 | Registered: Apr 2004
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quote:Originally posted by kamar: There are strange things in my man....he told me that is not importat for him have or not have children....(I find strange this),he told me that his mother not will be happy for foreigner wife so he prefer before make marriage and after make meet his family (also this is strange for me). He told that for we is better live in my country for work, for have better life....maybe he is sincere but.....there are much strange things....
Dear Kamar, as u see by yourselfe, there are alot of daoubts inside of you. And with doubts like this, you shouldnt marri. All the things what akshar told ya r important for the most egyptians. And that he want u to meet his family AFTER marriage is like a bad joke. The family in egypt is very important and also the marriage is a big thing. You have to know that many egyptian men cant marry an egytian girl, cause of the money. They have to buy gold and to pay for the marriage. They safe money for years to do the marriage. And when they r poor, than the only way is to marry a foreign girl. Have i talked with him about the religion? How important is this for him and how old is he? Im sorry when my opinion is hurting you, but i think, that he just want to leave egypt and of course he needs money. For me, is his meaning about the family the most strange thing. Its a biiiig shame for the family when he would do this.
Anyway, maybe im wrong, its just my opinion. I wish u good luck and hope u think deeply.
Akhnaton
PS: In which country do you live?
------------------ White water, white sky. If we can swim, we can fly.
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Don't worry, you don't hurt me telling me these things....important that someone tries to open my eyes....I think I will have more hurt if I make marriage without know these things.... well, now I will put him to so many tests,so, from hes answer and reaction I can understand much things. Posts: 98 | Registered: Apr 2004
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Actually some men in Egypt are very independent from there families to the point of only telling the family they got married without first letting the family see the fiance.some even travell and marry outside Egypt these things happen. some families do not accept such marriage and therefore some guys prefer to go for it without having a meet between girl and family as they know how it will be like. whether this is wrong or right but from what i have seen sometimes it's sincere and it works very well without the family.
quote:Originally posted by AkhnAton*: Dear Kamar, as u see by yourselfe, there are alot of daoubts inside of you. And with doubts like this, you shouldnt marri. All the things what akshar told ya r important for the most egyptians. And that he want u to meet his family AFTER marriage is like a bad joke. The family in egypt is very important and also the marriage is a big thing. You have to know that many egyptian men cant marry an egytian girl, cause of the money. They have to buy gold and to pay for the marriage. They safe money for years to do the marriage. And when they r poor, than the only way is to marry a foreign girl. Have i talked with him about the religion? How important is this for him and how old is he? Im sorry when my opinion is hurting you, but i think, that he just want to leave egypt and of course he needs money. For me, is his meaning about the family the most strange thing. Its a biiiig shame for the family when he would do this.
Anyway, maybe im wrong, its just my opinion. I wish u good luck and hope u think deeply.
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Do you want tell that can to be normal make marriage without tell family????? if you tell this, maybe for him is normal.... Not Orfi but civil marriage. Posts: 98 | Registered: Apr 2004
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Originally posted by kamar: There are strange things in my man....he told me that is not importat for him have or not have children....(I find strange this),he told me that his mother not will be happy for foreigner wife so he prefer before make marriage and after make meet his family (also this is strange for me). He told that for we is better live in my country for work, for have better life....maybe he is sincere but.....there are much strange things....
Dear Kamar:
I do not want to hurt your feelings...but this is the same as happened to me...later, after 3 years I discovered the truth...my husband has an Egyptian wife, and 3 more...and he refuses to give me a divorce. I am going through very difficult time to be rid of this deceiver...his words were the same as your man....and he was extremely clever...save yourself the heartache and find another! Good luck! Cherryy
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any decent family would only want happiness for their kids, regardless of there background, they might disagree and have bad feeling about their son marrying a certain girl and that's understood, but once they know he is happy, and once they know he will be happy , she becomes family regardless of what she is.
it happened in my family, my brother was in love with this girl he meet in collage and wanted to marry her, but my parent weren’t very pleased with the idea of him marrying a girl that is not even half Egyptian, and the whole family indicated that that is A VERY BAD thing to do, I thought about it then and asked them < can any of you give me a valid reason why it isn’t a good idea? and of course no one had an answer to that, and after a while specially when I told them I wouldn’t even ask permission to marry whom ever I like even if she was from a different planet, they decide to ignore there feeling and meet her ( after 3 years) , and once they saw her, they just fell in love with her, and I don’t think anyone can imagine my brother being with any one else
Cherryy; if you see allot of strange things going on , and you cant explain it, then you should think about it very carefully.
I understand that your man, knows his mom would welcome the idea of him marrying you, but wouldn’t he at least want her to see the woman he chose for himself? also he doesnt want to live in his country ( for any reason that might be ) plus , he doesn’t care about his family, doesn’t want children, that should give you an indication about what kind of a family man he would be, and if he have no attachment to the country that he grew up in, what kind of an attachment he would have for you
Normal people (at least in my opinion people with some sort of passion) would get marred and live in strange land because the work condition is better, they get married to the person they love, and live in a place that makes them feel HOME
we all speech out of our own experiences, I had an American friend I meet in Michigan who was just dying to marry ANY Egyptian man< I never understood why she wanted an Egyptian man so much , and she knew one Egyptian guy and asked me to befriend him since she was already planning to marry him, I remember what she said top me a couple days before I took the plane to Egypt " IF YOU DOO not help me with this guy, YOU WILL MARRY me, so GOD HELP ME :angry: " I replied " No no NO, I'll help you,I don’t know where you got this guy from anyway, but God helps you " really so on my next visit to Egypt I meet the guy ( nice guy and all ) and after I talked to him and he telling me how much he loves her and is welling to do anything to be with her he would leve his country, his family and everything behind just to be with her, and ask for my help to bring her to Egypt for him and bla bla bla, I wanted to scream in his face “YOU FREKKIING LIER, she is too nice for you to brake her heart” but it wasn’t my call nor my decision. when I went back to the states, she of course wanted to ask me allot of questions about the guy that she is in love with on the phone , and I told her he is a big lier, and he doesn’t care much for anything than the Green card. she said "well, if you are not gonna marry me yourself (wink wink), I will marry him, and if he wants the green card I'll give it to him if he takes me to live in Egypt (don’t ask me because I didn’t understand myself ) anyway, they both went ahead with their plans , and he moved to the states to marry her, and the day she got pregnant he suddenly stopped loving her, and decided never to take her to Egypt as he promised. she loves him (I know that because it is very obvious) plus she doesn’t want to keep it a secrets, and she knows he doesn’t love her and is just waiting to get his papers completed, then he will just dump her and get the job he wanted and the citizenship he dreamt off, and through couple of dollars at the end of every month for her and her baby, for now she is happy, and I think the was happy from the day she married him, but she knows she is setting on a time bomb, and the clock is ticking
when you want a family, you cannot waste your time with someone who isn’t sure he wants one himself, motherless, already have a family and trying to sever any relation he/she have with
quote:Originally posted by Cherryy: Originally posted by kamar: There are strange things in my man....he told me that is not importat for him have or not have children....(I find strange this),he....................e same as your man....and he was extremely clever...save yourself the heartache and find another! Good luck! Cherryy
[This message has been edited by welsafty (edited 07 September 2004).]
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I can only speak out of experience for myself. I was warmly welcomed into divers egyptian familys. For as far as i know there is not a big problem for an egyptian man marrying a foreign girl, but there were more problems when my brother married my sister in law. She is egyptian. And there were a lot of troubles, for example that my brother was foreigner. They have overcome all obstacles and are very happy together. She told me that for a muslim girl marrying someone else than muslim was not welcomed by everybody. But if a muslim man wants to marry a girl, a foreign girl that is not egyptian and not muslim the problem is less big......................
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) anyway, they both went ahead with their plans , and he moved to the states to marry her, and the day she got pregnant he suddenly stopped loving her, and decided never to take her to Egypt as he promised.
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