posted
So, I started seeing Kofie about a month and a half ago. We're both in our late 20s, he's been in the US for about 3 years. Every few weeks or so, he'll go under the radar, stop calling or texting for a day or two, even though he said he was going to call me. So, I wait it out and ignore him because I'm not going to chase/smother him. Then, a few more days go by and he texts, "I haven't heard from you at all!" As if it's MY fault that we haven't spoken and he failed to call when he said he would. What is wrong with him? Is this some kind of culturual thing that I'm not getting? I really don't want to keep chasing after him, as I find it undignified, but I can't figure him out. Any thoughts?
Posts: 5 | From: Ohio | Registered: May 2006
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posted
Hi Josie, so you are dating this guy for six weeks only? Why don't you ask him what he was doing when you could't reach him? And if you do, is he quickly changing the subject? Is he having family or friends nearby? Is he taking drugs? How much do you know about this man? I thought you would ask about possible cultural differences. This behaviour is definitely only person related. He's hiding something. You either want to find it out or you stop seeing him. Good luck.
Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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Thanks, Lily. He's always "tired" from work when we aren't together. He's usually good about calling every day, even on his "bad" days (he seems pretty moody) but then, about two times now, we've had this I'll call you issue and then, when he doesnt' call and I ignore him, he tries to blame it on me. We've come to the concensus that his actions aren't meant to repel me away, since he remains interested enough to keep seeing me and calling me. I never get the booty call, either, or anything lasat minute. I'm just frustrated!
Posts: 5 | From: Ohio | Registered: May 2006
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posted
If he stays without calling you this way after only 6 weeks of dating, what is he going to do after three months... Both men and women are supposed to show their best sides at the beginning of a relationship, but your guy doesn't seem to make too many efforts...Be sure that he's not seeing someone else, that he's not hiding anything. Once it's clear, ask yourself if someone who doesn't show interest in you for a few days really deserve your love. Good luck!
Posts: 531 | Registered: Jan 2006
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JosieCosie, I think that he maybe wants to call you and then forgets for a couple of days, and the expects you to do the calling. I also think maybe he is leading you on.
Posts: 935 | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
Thanks for the message, Fairy Dust, definitealy something to be on the look-out for. Good thing is that I've already quizzed him about the green card and see it. (I used to work in an immigration law firm).
Posts: 5 | From: Ohio | Registered: May 2006
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Josie, Would you tolerate that behavior from any man regardless of origin? Listen to your inner voice!
Posts: 46 | Registered: May 2006
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Hi. I just got an idea... Wouldnt it be great and also quite fun to arrange a website where every girl that met "this wonderful egyptian man" at her vacation, could publish a picture on him?!?! I bet money on the fact that there will be a lot of girls reqognizing "her love of her life"..... but posted by another girl??? And all U guys that work in the tourist areas can reply on the one U know about????? =)
I dont mean to be insensitive,... but I know by experience........ sweet talkers can fool the most suspicious girl `)
Posts: 10 | Registered: Apr 2006
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quote:Originally posted by I love cookies: Hi. I just got an idea... Wouldnt it be great and also quite fun to arrange a website where every girl that met "this wonderful egyptian man" at her vacation, could publish a picture on him?!?! I bet money on the fact that there will be a lot of girls reqognizing "her love of her life"..... but posted by another girl??? And all U guys that work in the tourist areas can reply on the one U know about????? =)
I dont mean to be insensitive,... but I know by experience........ sweet talkers can fool the most suspicious girl `)
I would be more than happy to get one started if there is enough interest.
Posts: 17 | From: United States | Registered: May 2006
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posted
well this man seems playing around, or on the other hand having another affair which disorbes most of his time and when he becomes free he calls u again he is playing on two sides
quote:Originally posted by I love cookies: Hi. I just got an idea... Wouldnt it be great and also quite fun to arrange a website where every girl that met "this wonderful egyptian man" at her vacation, could publish a picture on him?!?! I bet money on the fact that there will be a lot of girls reqognizing "her love of her life"..... but posted by another girl??? And all U guys that work in the tourist areas can reply on the one U know about????? =)
I dont mean to be insensitive,... but I know by experience........ sweet talkers can fool the most suspicious girl `)
Why stop there?
Why not have a Greek website, and an Italian, and Turkish, and Malaysian, and Kenyan, and Somalian, you need to cover at least 200 countries of the world to satisfy all the poor whiny women that got "deceived" by an Egyptian man.
Oh, right, because Egyptian men are the only men who do this.
I don't mean to be insensitive, but women are just as deceptive as men, if not more so, also, Egyptian men did not invent deception it's everywhere.
I was decieved & lied to constantly by an American woman, I guess I should start an American Women Are All CuntBags Website.
Any takers?
A friend of mine married an Egyptian girl a while back, last I heard, as soon as she got her residency, she left him & their son, and is now living with a woman.
Maybe I should start a All Egyptian Women Are Big Fat Dykes Website?
Any takers?
You people crack me the f#ck up.
Posts: 2404 | Registered: May 2006
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quote:Originally posted by I love cookies: Hi. I just got an idea... Wouldnt it be great and also quite fun to arrange a website where every girl that met "this wonderful egyptian man" at her vacation, could publish a picture on him?!?! I bet money on the fact that there will be a lot of girls reqognizing "her love of her life"..... but posted by another girl??? And all U guys that work in the tourist areas can reply on the one U know about????? =)
I dont mean to be insensitive,... but I know by experience........ sweet talkers can fool the most suspicious girl `)
Why stop there?
Why not have a Greek website, and an Italian, and Turkish, and Malaysian, and Kenyan, and Somalian, you need to cover at least 200 countries of the world to satisfy all the poor whiny women that got "deceived" by an Egyptian man.
Oh, right, because Egyptian men are the only men who do this.
I don't mean to be insensitive, but women are just as deceptive as men, if not more so, also, Egyptian men did not invent deception it's everywhere.
I was decieved & lied to constantly by an American woman, I guess I should start an American Women Are All CuntBags Website.
Any takers?
A friend of mine married an Egyptian girl a while back, last I heard, as soon as she got her residency, she left him & their son, and is now living with a woman.
Maybe I should start a All Egyptian Women Are Big Fat Dykes Website?
Any takers?
You people crack me the f#ck up.
That is why they are called interest groups. I'm sure there are groups as the ones you described. Some of us are interested in the egyptian perspective. Isn't that why you joined this group and post on this board that is specific to Egypt love and marriage?
I agree that women are also as deceptive as men. And they are also all over the world. But women come here with concerns about the men they meet from Egypt. It would be nice to feel free to post without feeling like the sacrificial lamb of the day.
Posts: 17 | From: United States | Registered: May 2006
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posted
1) I quoted your post, but it wasn't my intention for you to be "the sacrifical lamb of the day" let's not get our panties in a knot.
2) Anyone who has been deceived needs to ask themselves why they got deceieved, and how could I have let this happen to myself, because the only common denominator, is themselves. Takes two to tango. If you're not willing to take responsibility for that, and go to the other end of the spectrum and blame entire populations for your problems, well, feel free.
What I'm trying to get across is, people decieve us because we let them.
3) If indeed you think there are "groups" like I described, I really don't know what to say to you, except get a clue, because I was being sarcastic. *edit*: Those things reallly happened, still it was sarcasm.
4) No. I joined this forum mainly to make fun of people & shoot the sh!t.
Ever seen 'As Good As it Gets'?
Remember what Jack Nicholson said?
-"How do you know women so well?" -"Simple, I think of a man, and I take away reason & accountability."
Posts: 2404 | Registered: May 2006
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If you think you will gain any "insight" as to why Egyptian men in particular seem to you to be deceptive, it will be negligible.
People deceive because they see an opportunity to decieve someone with their guard down; I myself was a perfect example of this last year.
Also, I'm not defending Egyptians, sh!t, far from it, I know most of them can be real creeps, in many different ways; I'm the loudest voice in criticizing Egyptians, trust me.
BTW, you weren't talking about a "support group" you were agreeing with 'I love crack' and her silly-assed notion that posting a website with these creeps mugshots on it would be cool idea.
That reeks of feminine vengance & fury and it's not constructive at all now is it?
posted
Me.....I was engaged to a Coptic Egyptian for 2 years. He was the exact same way, everything was my fault, he would try and make me feel that I didn't love him enough, because I didn't call, or I didn't do this or that. It's all head games sweetie. I wasn't supposed to bother (aka.asking questions or fighting) him in the morning because "he just woke up" but then after work......"I'm very tired." He ALWAYS asked me to go out with him with friends and to the Cafe' but in the end was saying to me that I wouldn't let him go anywhere. LOL For someone who was a prince in the beginning, ended up cheating on me with a married woman (which he said he would never talk to a married woman) & doing Cocaine. You truely never know. The funny thing after we broke up....he had the nerve to tell me that I am the only person in the United States that he trusts. AND the only thing he has to be proud of since he has been in the US is that I loved him. lmaoooooooo What a load of s***t. This type of person really burns me. Just to make things clear, he did have all his papers and was in the States when I met him. BUT he had this funny idea about me coming to Egypt to bring his brother!!!! Always a motive. Also, I want to add, I in no way associate this experience with the Egyptian people. I wouldn't be in Egypt now & married!!!!!!! Posts: 177 | From: Alexandria,Egypt / Missouri,USA | Registered: May 2006
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Ashkia...that's not only Egyptian men who turn things around on us..it's pretty much ALL men. Most men don't like to own their faults so they twist and turn it until it's our fault. Of course we ladies aren't innocent either. We bitch for the sake of bitching. We overanalyze, whine, complain, etc.
Posts: 2735 | From: my desk | Registered: Jul 2005
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yeahhhhh but the cocaine was a little much..... Wouldn't expect someone who was brought up with good strong family values to end up like that. Set aside from how he hurt me...for someone who had such big dreams to come to the states and be successful, it was very disapointing to see. Also, Madame if you read the end of my post you would have seen that I did say I am not generalizing to egyptian men. I wouldn't be married to one now. lol
Posts: 177 | From: Alexandria,Egypt / Missouri,USA | Registered: May 2006
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Well said hellraiser!!! It takes two to tango! We only let things happen for various reasons and the we complain about them. So, let's start thinking a bit, analyze things like we do now and then, will be less decived ones!
-------------------- Hell yeah,is good to be me! Posts: 7 | From: old europe | Registered: May 2006
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quote:Originally posted by JosieCosie: So, I started seeing Kofie about a month and a half ago. We're both in our late 20s, he's been in the US for about 3 years. Every few weeks or so, he'll go under the radar, stop calling or texting for a day or two, even though he said he was going to call me. So, I wait it out and ignore him because I'm not going to chase/smother him. Then, a few more days go by and he texts, "I haven't heard from you at all!" As if it's MY fault that we haven't spoken and he failed to call when he said he would. What is wrong with him? Is this some kind of culturual thing that I'm not getting? I really don't want to keep chasing after him, as I find it undignified, but I can't figure him out. Any thoughts?
see if he takes the bait with a friend of yours flirting or meeting him...that should do the trick Posts: 13440 | Registered: Feb 2006
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quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: see if he takes the bait with a friend of yours flirting or meeting him...that should do the trick [/QB]
I've done that once or twice, they were caught in the act, but funny part was that they tried to explain with lame, lame excuses!!
Posts: 7 | From: old europe | Registered: May 2006
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quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: lol such as ?
well, things happened on a dating site! and he claimed he knew was me under a different name!! doh, right!
Posts: 7 | From: old europe | Registered: May 2006
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quote:Originally posted by JosieCosie: Really? What are your experiences that indicate this is the case?
My experience is that this annoying cat & mouse sh!t that he's doing with you, has been done to me before.
Posts: 2404 | Registered: May 2006
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quote:Originally posted by sim42sim: I've done that once or twice, they were caught in the act, but funny part was that they tried to explain with lame, lame excuses!!
"Sorry babe, I thought she was your friend, I was just making her feel welcome, no baby! My hand was not on her ass, now who are you gonna believe, me or your lying eyeballs? Ok, listen, I gotta split, my mom's on fire, I'll call you."Posts: 2404 | Registered: May 2006
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LOL all too familiar excuses huh? You know, I look back and wonder how blind and stupid I was. All the time hearing over and over, you aren't strong, you need to be strong, you aren't this, you aren't that...... I dedicated my life to proving to this guy how strong I was. LOL The whole time, he was the one making me weak. Guess what ladies??? Now, I have a good job, I bought my OWN new car, I started college again, I have a wonderful husband who respects me....... LOOK WHO'S STRONG NOW My point; don't make yourself the fool. You may question, why is he doing this, what should I do.....But.......But.....But......I love him, etc. YOU know the whole time EXACTLY what's up, and what you should do. I am saying this to no one special. I have just learned that we MUST Do what we say, instead of saying what we will do. Listen to yourself, and I promise you, 90% of the time you are right. Posts: 177 | From: Alexandria,Egypt / Missouri,USA | Registered: May 2006
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quote:Originally posted by sim42sim: I've done that once or twice, they were caught in the act, but funny part was that they tried to explain with lame, lame excuses!!
"Sorry babe, I thought she was your friend, I was just making her feel welcome, no baby! My hand was not on her ass, now who are you gonna believe, me or your lying eyeballs? Ok, listen, I gotta split, my mom's on fire, I'll call you."
LOL you got it perfectly right!!!
Posts: 7 | From: old europe | Registered: May 2006
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quote:Originally posted by JosieCosie: So, I started seeing Kofie about a month and a half ago. We're both in our late 20s, he's been in the US for about 3 years. Every few weeks or so, he'll go under the radar, stop calling or texting for a day or two, even though he said he was going to call me. So, I wait it out and ignore him because I'm not going to chase/smother him. Then, a few more days go by and he texts, "I haven't heard from you at all!" As if it's MY fault that we haven't spoken and he failed to call when he said he would. What is wrong with him? Is this some kind of culturual thing that I'm not getting? I really don't want to keep chasing after him, as I find it undignified, but I can't figure him out. Any thoughts?
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Both men and women are supposed to show their best sides at the beginning of a relationship, but your guy doesn't seem to make too many efforts...Be sure that he's not seeing someone else, that he's not hiding anything. Once it's clear, ask yourself if someone who doesn't show interest in you for a few days really deserve your love.
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I wouldn't be in Egypt now & married!!!!!!! ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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