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I would appreciate any help or advice anyone can give me. I am English and have been in contact with an Egyptian guy. We met while I was on holiday and have been keeping in contact ever since. I am going to visit him again soon but I see I may have trouble in booking a hotel for us both. What is the best way to go about this? We really want to spend time together and get to know each other more.
Long term, the plan is if we still get on well on holiday, we'd like to marry. Can anyone give me advice on the best way to go about this? He is Muslim and I am Christian. I figure I will need to speak to the embassy but I have no idea where to start....
Thanks in advance.
Posts: 31 | From: england | Registered: Jun 2006
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Duhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You really plan to marry a guy you've just met on holiday??? You will not be able to be in a hotel together... it's not allowed... also, he's a muslim.. you're planning to sleep with him already? If you really are planning to marry this guy....(or is he talking about orfi... 'local' marriage, known here, disrespectfully as f@cking paper ) maybe you need to know more about Egypt, and the fact that you'll be coming to a muslim country!! The embassy also will probably advise you to not rush into marriage with this guy!! There are too many Egyptian guys that just want a visa out....sex.... money.... Sorry if I seem cynical, but I've lived in a tourist area of Egypt long enough to have seen this story many times over!! What part of Egypt was he?? Must be a tourist area... do you realise these guys have access to women 24/7 , and they don't sit at home pining over a tourist who's just left?
Posts: 4238 | From: USA | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by rubyroo: I would appreciate any help or advice anyone can give me. I am English and have been in contact with an Egyptian guy. We met while I was on holiday and have been keeping in contact ever since. I am going to visit him again soon but I see I may have trouble in booking a hotel for us both. What is the best way to go about this? We really want to spend time together and get to know each other more.
Long term, the plan is if we still get on well on holiday, we'd like to marry. Can anyone give me advice on the best way to go about this? He is Muslim and I am Christian. I figure I will need to speak to the embassy but I have no idea where to start....
Thanks in advance.
Feel free to ignore the bitter ramblings above.
Just use common sense and don't rush into anything, usually one has to go thru alot people to find one honest person with integrity, so take the time to really know everything about this person, and if you notice any red flags, don't ignore them.
posted
Exactly, I met my now husband of 2 years in Sharm, we are now expecting our first child and we only have what samia calls a disrespectful piece of f**king paper.
Of course you must be corcious and take your time in getting to know him.
I only knew my now husband for 3 hours on my first trip to Sharm before I came back on my own, I just went with my gut feeling and it turned out to be right.
If you want to stay together, then, I dont know where you met but the best thing to do would to rent an apartment in a place like - in sharm for example - Delta. and just because you stay together don't rush into anything.
Take your time and spend time together, talk and always go with your head not your heart.
Good Luck!
-------------------- Do you think I look like George Clooney!!! Posts: 155 | From: Eeeegggyyypppttt | Registered: Apr 2006
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posted
Thankyou. Samia I hear what you're saying - I know it seems silly but I'm not a teenager and I've been around long enough to know there are a lot of sharks out there. We met in Sharm and we have been chatting online every single night so I don't see how he'd have time to meet anyone else.
Hellraiser - thankyou for your positive comments which I will bear in mind.
Ninky - thanks. I am being cautious, after everything I've read on here and in the media I couldn't be anything else!!! We are going to meet again in Sharm and spend the week talking and getting to know each other more. Congratulations on the baby.
Cheers guys
Posts: 31 | From: england | Registered: Jun 2006
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Have you met or talked about meeting his family yet? If he hasn't mentioned his family this should be a big red flag.
Posts: 516 | Registered: Jul 2005
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If you want to get married and have it recognised outside Egypt then the only way is the Embassy. http://www.britishembassy.org.eg/ It takes a while and you would need a lot of paper work and he would have to be free to marry.
If on the other hand you are trying out the realtionship and would prefer to keep your assets safe then an Orfi marriage might suit you better. Lots of people look down on these but lots of others don't. You could use it as an engagement or even a marriage just within Egypt. If it is registered at the court and publically delcared and his family accept it. then go ahead it is a great option if you want to protect any assets you might have back in the UK. If it is regestered then you need to get a proper divorce but if it is unregistered you just tear it up.
The important thing is that your relationship is accpeted by his family. If you haven't meet his mother don't do anything.
-------------------- Jane Akshar UK Co-owner of www.flatsinluxor.co.uk Appartments and Tours in Luxor Posts: 2791 | From: www.flatsinluxor.co.uk, Luxor, Egypt | Registered: Jan 2003
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quote:Originally posted by _hellraiser: and if you notice any red flags, don't ignore them.
Good luck.
Excellent advice! I think we women often tend to ignore the warning signs we don't want to see.
That said, I just think it's harder to work through the hinks in a relationship when it's long distance....take your time. Posts: 8794 | From: 01-20-09 The End of an Error | Registered: Dec 2004
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He wants me to meet his family when I'm over there in a few weeks. He mentioned that pretty early on actually.
I think the main hitch would be with my family - my mum doesn't like the idea one bit.
Its quite interesting that I have had many negative comments but also lots of positive ones. Thanks everyone for the advice.
Posts: 31 | From: england | Registered: Jun 2006
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Well with all due respect to your mum she is nothign compared to an antagnistic Egypt mother in law. But it is good he wants you to meet them and you should definately do that.
Keep an open mind and a closed purse
-------------------- Jane Akshar UK Co-owner of www.flatsinluxor.co.uk Appartments and Tours in Luxor Posts: 2791 | From: www.flatsinluxor.co.uk, Luxor, Egypt | Registered: Jan 2003
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quote:Originally posted by rubyroo: I would appreciate any help or advice anyone can give me. I am English and have been in contact with an Egyptian guy. We met while I was on holiday and have been keeping in contact ever since. I am going to visit him again soon but I see I may have trouble in booking a hotel for us both. What is the best way to go about this? We really want to spend time together and get to know each other more.
Long term, the plan is if we still get on well on holiday, we'd like to marry. Can anyone give me advice on the best way to go about this? He is Muslim and I am Christian. I figure I will need to speak to the embassy but I have no idea where to start....
Thanks in advance.
Feel free to ignore the bitter ramblings above.
Just use common sense and don't rush into anything, usually one has to go thru alot people to find one honest person with integrity, so take the time to really know everything about this person, and if you notice any red flags, don't ignore them.
Good luck.
you're quite nice for a hellraiser Posts: 13440 | Registered: Feb 2006
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posted
I would still say you can not plan for marrige with one holiday only , i am Egyptian and i would not want to get married with someone i only met for a week or two , take it easy , he might be Mr. right , or not !!! before you get attracted by him , try o understand the country , the culture and the mentality of Egyptians. you will have to keep coming very often to make sure he is the right guy, Maybe you will have to visit his family where they live , and you will need to ask your family to come over as well to meet him . my advise : do not rush sex , or money spending . let him spend his own money . if he is honist with you he would not mind at all spending his money . and i would still say you better stay in a hotel on your own and you can meet up every day. he can still take you out. wish you good luck
Posts: 520 | Registered: Jun 2006
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posted
This is all very good advice. I'm learning from it too. It can be difficult to not believe all the lies that pour out of the mouths of many of those men. We have to believe that there are honest people in the world. Sometimes our judgement get clouded when the heart is involved. Egyptian sharm, I like what everything you said. Good insite for us non Egyptians. Keep hope alive. I am.
Posts: 46 | Registered: May 2006
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quote:Originally posted by egyptian_sharm: I would still say you can not plan for marrige with one holiday only , i am Egyptian and i would not want to get married with someone i only met for a week or two , take it easy , he might be Mr. right , or not !!! before you get attracted by him , try o understand the country , the culture and the mentality of Egyptians. you will have to keep coming very often to make sure he is the right guy, Maybe you will have to visit his family where they live , and you will need to ask your family to come over as well to meet him . my advise : do not rush sex , or money spending . let him spend his own money . if he is honist with you he would not mind at all spending his money . and i would still say you better stay in a hotel on your own and you can meet up every day. he can still take you out. wish you good luck
Take the advice of this guy... he's totally right!!
Posts: 4238 | From: USA | Registered: Jul 2004
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Very true.My husband to be lives in morocco,inshallah iam going back there to agadir late sep/oct taking my sister with me so we can all discuss marriage etc.If we all agree then we can plan everything,be wise and never travel alone to another country.Good luck
-------------------- Every morning is a fresh beginning. Every day is the world made new. Today is a new day. Today is my world made new. I have lived all my life up to this moment, to come to this day. This moment - this day - is as good as any moment in all eternity. Posts: 224 | From: england | Registered: Oct 2005
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I don't have a cynical axe to grind here; but I was talking to an Egyptian friend last night about just this kind of thing. I KNOW that no sane European girl would consider planning a marriage to a Spanish waiter/Swiss ski instructor?Portugese tour leader .. whatever... after such a short relationship. So why Egypt??? Aaaah I think it's cultural misunderstandings. In England, you meet a guy, you like each other, you maybe spend the night together, you both say 'Hey that was great. I'll call you eh?' 'Maybe he does call, maybe not. That's life no problem, maybe it turns into a big deal, maybe you try living together for a while, and so on and so on. Here, you sleep with a guy, and culture steps in, even the lowest life Sharm sharks start with the 'Habibi I love you, want to marry,' etc. Part instinct, part religion, and No, not really money, or visa stuff. Just centuries of social programming kicking in. Come back, GET ENGAGED!! Maybe do the orfi thing, but make it clear to him and his family that you will not rush into it, girls here do get engaged very early in a relationship, but most have a pretty long 'getting to know you' period after that. I do know, I'm English, we aren't used to guys asking for our grubby hands in marriage, our culture kicks in too, [got say Yes or No, phew!!] but get a bit of perspective, he l;oves you in your cut of jeans, impressed with your worldly wisdom, credit cards, beer, and so on. ^ weeks after your wedding he will probably want to yell at you for smiling at his friends, wearing short skirts, and the family ... don't ask. Ask for a loooong engaement, check out the implications of this, study Islam if you can. He will respect you, and so will we. Good Luck habibi.
Posts: 1399 | From: alexandria | Registered: Jan 2002
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quote:Originally posted by jessie: I don't have a cynical axe to grind here; but I was talking to an Egyptian friend last night about just this kind of thing. I KNOW that no sane European girl would consider planning a marriage to a Spanish waiter/Swiss ski instructor?Portugese tour leader .. whatever... after such a short relationship. So why Egypt??? Aaaah I think it's cultural misunderstandings. In England, you meet a guy, you like each other, you maybe spend the night together, you both say 'Hey that was great. I'll call you eh?' 'Maybe he does call, maybe not. That's life no problem, maybe it turns into a big deal, maybe you try living together for a while, and so on and so on. Here, you sleep with a guy, and culture steps in, even the lowest life Sharm sharks start with the 'Habibi I love you, want to marry,' etc. Part instinct, part religion, and No, not really money, or visa stuff. Just centuries of social programming kicking in. Come back, GET ENGAGED!! Maybe do the orfi thing, but make it clear to him and his family that you will not rush into it, girls here do get engaged very early in a relationship, but most have a pretty long 'getting to know you' period after that. I do know, I'm English, we aren't used to guys asking for our grubby hands in marriage, our culture kicks in too, [got say Yes or No, phew!!] but get a bit of perspective, he l;oves you in your cut of jeans, impressed with your worldly wisdom, credit cards, beer, and so on. ^ weeks after your wedding he will probably want to yell at you for smiling at his friends, wearing short skirts, and the family ... don't ask. Ask for a loooong engaement, check out the implications of this, study Islam if you can. He will respect you, and so will we. Good Luck habibi.
posted
Thanks guys. I'm so glad I came on here for advice, everyones been really helpful.
egyptian_sharm - I agree with a lot of what you said. I intened to keep my purse firmly shut (not that there's much money in there anyway!) It is difficult to try and understand new cultures but I am doing research so getting there!!!
nelle - I'm trying to keep the hope alive babe!
maryanne - I'm trying to be as wise as I can.
jessie - I guess you're right about him being impressed. He probably thinks I'm loaded - after all I earn so much more over here. I am currently reading a book on islam - I figured it would help if I can get my head round it a bit. I don't want to convert though, it would break my nan's heart. And as for the short skirt thing, he already mentioned about a certain little denim number I own... And we had a strange discussion about bikinis...
Posts: 31 | From: england | Registered: Jun 2006
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What is wrong in UK girls ? can't you find any boyfriend, so you need to go into others countries and polluate local people with your open legs culture ???? English girls are so easy to sleep with, and fucking so naive , I worked with some of them in Cairo, holalala, everyday a new boy friend,and one more to add to their 1 night stand list the worse thing is that everywhere they go, they think that everybody is like them and get so stumm when they see someone different, like they are allien. From what I see English culture is base on drinking and sex,poor people
Posts: 30 | Registered: May 2006
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Samia I like your reply but she will never listen to you. At the office where I use to have to work with some of them, we use to try to give them some advices, warnings, but nothing worked. And they always thing that they are so sbeautiful, and better than others European or Egyptian girls. They would think that your advices are jaleousy, cause for them nothing is best than UK girls
Posts: 30 | Registered: May 2006
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quote:Originally posted by rosssa: What is wrong in UK girls ? can't you find any boyfriend, so you need to go into others countries and polluate local people with your open legs culture ???? English girls are so easy to sleep with, and fucking so naive , I worked with some of them in Cairo, holalala, everyday a new boy friend,and one more to add to their 1 night stand list the worse thing is that everywhere they go, they think that everybody is like them and get so stumm when they see someone different, like they are allien. From what I see English culture is base on drinking and sex,poor people
posted
rosssa thank you so much for your kind words. you obviously know jack **** about england and our culture. open leg culture? you really have a lot to learn. you sound bitter and twisted and i pity you.
Posts: 31 | From: england | Registered: Jun 2006
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rosssa thank you so much for your kind words. you obviously know jack **** about england and our culture. open leg culture? you really have a lot to learn. you sound bitter and twisted and i pity you.
Lolol I lived 15 years in UK so I know very well the culture. Not all the British are like I described but the majority of them do have drink problem, especially women, + they temp to be very easy to sleep with, it is very well known in Europe by the way hey what have you learn about Egyptian culture? From what you said about your nice boy friend you don’t seems to have learn a lot so far do you think that in Egypt you’re going to find the same open leg culture? If your bf would have 10 % of respect for you he would have first at least introduce you to his parents, but for someone who from UK and think that everywhere in the world people are as much free as in UK it my be difficult to understand. Maybe after spending a couples of months In Egypt you would understand the word RESPECT Posts: 30 | Registered: May 2006
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I love this word "OPEN LEG CULTURE" r u open minded ??? NOOOOOO im open Leged Nice
Posts: 420 | From: LALA Land | Registered: Apr 2005
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quote:Originally posted by rosssa: they think that nothing is best than UK girls
this is the only true thing youve said. of course we think no one is BETTER than us. do you have an inferiority complex? do you thing another nationality of women is BETTER than you?
Posts: 5642 | From: hellonearth.myfastforum.org Forum Index | Registered: Feb 2006
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good I'm glad you realise that. I didn't come on here for people to have such a go at me! I know that the difference in cultures is bound to result in differences of opinion but thats just life. I don't claim to know much about Egyptian culture but I am doing my best to learn. I fail to see how my guy could introduce me to his parents seeing as he lives in Sharm and they live in Cairo. We would never have had time when I was there before.
As for respect, I have plenty of respect for myself. Just because some English girls sleep with guys before marriage doesn't make us bad people. Perhaps you should try it, you may lighten up a bit!!
Posts: 31 | From: england | Registered: Jun 2006
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quote:Originally posted by rosssa: What is wrong in UK girls ? can't you find any boyfriend, so you need to go into others countries and polluate local people with your open legs culture ???? English girls are so easy to sleep with, and fucking so naive , I worked with some of them in Cairo, holalala, everyday a new boy friend,and one more to add to their 1 night stand list the worse thing is that everywhere they go, they think that everybody is like them and get so stumm when they see someone different, like they are allien. From what I see English culture is base on drinking and sex,poor people
I do not think UK girls are easy to sleep with ! maybe they do not mind to sleep with a guy once they like , or want , but i can not say it is easy. British ppl are very respectable and they have a lot of emotions . specially when they are a broad. and specially when the get to know you. i have been working with them for 12 years and i guess i know a lot about them.
Posts: 520 | Registered: Jun 2006
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And for the record, I don't think I'm better than anyone. I just happen to be single and while I was on holiday I met a sweet guy and we enjoy getting to know each other. I'm not racist or prejudiced so whats wrong in being with an Egyptian? If I only dated English guys everyone would think I was racist!!!!
And I don't have a new boyfriend every day, I'd never have the time....
Posts: 31 | From: england | Registered: Jun 2006
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egyption_sharm.... where do yo work? do you know el maya beach? diamond beach? dolphin diving school? ciao carlo tours?
Posts: 5642 | From: hellonearth.myfastforum.org Forum Index | Registered: Feb 2006
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Well, at the risk of sounding prudish, the whole one night stand is a lot of commonly accepted in England and a lot less frowned upon than in other places I've lived. Whether you take that as slutty or open minded depends on your perspective. But comparing...yes. Despite the stereotype of being frigid, they're actually quite liberal. And I do agree that alcohol is a key ingredient in that stereotype.
Posts: 2182 | Registered: Oct 2002
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quote:Originally posted by rosssa: the majority of them do have drink problem, especially women, + they temp to be very easy to sleep with,
the only drink problem i have is two hands and only one mouth..
but i agree... women are easy to sleep with, they are much softer than men and they dont steal all the covers.
Posts: 5642 | From: hellonearth.myfastforum.org Forum Index | Registered: Feb 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Charm El Feikh?: egyption_sharm.... where do yo work? do you know el maya beach? diamond beach? dolphin diving school? ciao carlo tours?
i have been working in sharm for the last five years of my life , so i know pretty good every place you mentioned but not ciao carlo tours . how aften you are in sharm then ?
Posts: 520 | Registered: Jun 2006
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do you know the guys that work the beach and the dive school?
Posts: 5642 | From: hellonearth.myfastforum.org Forum Index | Registered: Feb 2006
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quote:Originally posted by rubyroo: thankyou egyptian_sharm. I'm glad you don't all think we're evil!!
Why would i think you are evils. i do not think you are angels as well , but you are nice ppl at the end and i love to be with British . at least they are straight forward ppl.
Posts: 520 | Registered: Jun 2006
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do not know them personnaly but i can find out if you want ? i am actually dealing with the camel dive school.
Posts: 520 | Registered: Jun 2006
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no.. lol... i know them... there good guys. you mean the camel dive school on diamond beach? i know it. i know a few of the guys on diamond beach.. and lots of people in the hotel there... the grand sharm.
Posts: 5642 | From: hellonearth.myfastforum.org Forum Index | Registered: Feb 2006
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it is nice place anyway, but if you want a beach then it is only terazzina . for me it is the best place ever.
Posts: 520 | Registered: Jun 2006
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YESSSS!!!!! i was interested in buying it! i love terazina beach... love it! the bean bags, music and fires... wicked! my kind of beach!
el maya is just a bit further along... the next jetty... i know all the guys there!
Posts: 5642 | From: hellonearth.myfastforum.org Forum Index | Registered: Feb 2006
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by rosssa: [QB] What is wrong in UK girls ? can't you find any boyfriend, so you need to go into others countries and polluate local people with your open legs culture ????
"Open legs culture" is also in Egypt but egyptians don't speak aloud about that.
English girls are so easy to sleep with, and fucking so naive , I worked with some of them in Cairo, holalala, everyday a new boy friend,and one more to add to their 1 night stand list the worse thing is that everywhere they go, they think that everybody is like them and get so stumm when they see someone different, like they are allien. From what I see English culture is base on drinking and sex,poor people
You now it's not about be easy to sleep with someone that's something natural and EVERYBODY is doing the same. Especially egyptians love that. Posts: 979 | From: Another world | Registered: May 2006
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, I worked with some of them in Cairo, holalala, everyday a new boy friend,and one more to add to their 1 night stand list ![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
r u open minded ??? NOOOOOO im open Leged 
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