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I have chosen my wedding dress today and i am so excited I know you are probably saying why is she telling us this? What has this got to do with us? But i have to share it with someone and i have no family and most of my friends disapprove of my marrying Egyptian so sorry guys i have to tell you lot!!!
I just hope the desigh doesn't cause a stir in Alexandria I have tried to pick a modest dress but i do not do meringue dresses so it is very figure hugging in fact i cannot breathe in it!!!! I have asked them to design the front to be a little higher so my 'dumplings are not boiling over' but the top is a basque style so my shoulders, arms, etc are bare plz advise me before it is made so i can make any appropriate alterations i do not wish to cause any problems with my fiancee's family or friends and i cannot discuss the dress with him as it is 'bad luck'!!! I suppose the fact that i am only size 4 means that i am not showing off a voluptiouse body or does this not make any difference? Advice greatly appreciated..... Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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congrats habeeby, hmm i would ask his family about it, a sister maybe? and if the bare shoulders are a problem then you could always get a lace wrap. But from the wedding pictures i have seen in egypt, your dress will be fine.
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Thanks mysticheart! I will get that lace wrap though just in case Anyway i expect that the weather may be a little breezy in February so i may need a wrap.... The funny thing is i cannot get into this dress without help, somebody strong needs to lace the back up and pull it tight (you know the type), i am only a small frame so you can imagine how small my waist is when all this is done 18" and then god help me when i have to get it off again, i think i will be stuck in this dress forever - not very practical although it is very beautiful Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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hehe right, i am the same size as you. I wear a 3 to 4, though some of my clothes are a size 2 hahahaha, and the corset top that dress must have is indeed torturous haha. I think getting the dress off will be easier than getting it on though. Beautiful is the thing for your wedding day
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Hi habeeby! First of all,congrates for ur soon coming wedding!! Second,i dont think,ur bare shoulders will make any problem,as all brides are trying to b the most beautiful on this important day!Some veiled ones are even taking it off for this day.Ok,unless ur in laws are not "low class" (god,i hate that word!!),believe me,they wont mind!Thats ur day ! Best of luck! K
Posts: 46 | From: Cairo | Registered: Jun 2007
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HI there i hired my dress in Alex, it was so beautiful everyone was asking iff id brought it from europe, they actually put lace straps on it to hide my big arms, im sure when the day comes you will go for the day to the beautician and you will have youre fiances family with you to lace you up, i had also the kind where youre laced up at the back, it was fab, i recomend acacia beautician, i was like a princess, they made my time and me wonderful, sorry to say it , but i never felt as beautiful, they were wonderful in this salon, just have a fab day, i would do it over and over, i miss it now and spend my time gazing into windows looking at wedding dresses, heheh i didnt see one so far that was like mine, i wanted chiffon, and i had it, i will try to send fotos iff you like have a wonderful time
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Thanx guys, Yorkshire Rose i would love photo's and thanks for the tip on the beautician i will tell my fiancee to make sure that his family book acacia as they are taking care of everything. I am sure that i will have a fantastic day - lets face it i am marrying my hero! He is determined that he is going to sing too me at our wedding (i have mixed feelings about this) Enrique Englasias Forgive!
Leito you are welcome at my wedding but there will not be any dumplings for you Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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When I was in Cairo, I was surprised at the traditional cultural things that went on in weddings, even in families where they were Muslims. I guess they figured God didn't matter that day because they were getting married??
In any case, best wishes to you.
Posts: 1283 | From: Cairo | Registered: Feb 2006
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That's great feeling when arranging wedding dress, party, and invitation design with pre-wed pictures. Will you have seperate wedding party in Egypt? I mean one party for women only and other for men only.
Posts: 756 | From: ...be solution... | Registered: Jul 2007
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Yes i will have seperate wedding parties for the women and for the men. I am a christian and he is a muslim but my wedding in Alexandria will keep traditional egyptian for his family and our friends, i think this is only fair as i am in his country. But when we return to England we will have a second wedding and this will be traditional English but without the 'drunkeness' i am not a big drinker so i am trying to avoid my wedding becoming a 'piss up' which often happens in English culture. Anyway thanks everyone for your good wishes, much appreciated Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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best of luck to you . it is so exciting to here of your wedding plans . may god richly bless your marriage Posts: 9443 | From: USA...... | Registered: Jun 2006
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Thank you Micky, i am so excited! I just want to commit the rest of my life to this man, make him happy and care for him! The only 'downer' on this will be the waiting for his visa after we are married - i really don't want to return to England alone but sometimes love is worth waiting for.
Anyway never mind me, how are you sweetheart? Things can only get better for you and remember when you hit rock bottom there is only one way to go and that is 'up up up'! You will get there honey, i know you will Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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Congrats Habeeby on your forthcoming marriage.. Dont worry about the family & friends in the pool - Hopefully they will come round in time.. Its their own fears for you that makes them so strong willed.. and as for your wedding day without them.. you are marrying the man of your dreams and his family are gaining a daughter/sister/cousin/aunt.. In the words of fellow scouser Gerry Marsden (& from the cop) "YOU'LL NEVER.. WALK...ALONE.. you'll N..E..V..E..R walk..alone.. Have a wonderful wedding and very Happy life.
Posts: 164 | Registered: May 2007
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Sometimes things are too beautiful to be true. But reading how happy and enthusiastic you are I wish you all the best - things to be true because they are so beautiful! Posts: 2807 | From: Europe | Registered: Nov 2007
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Thanx Marmia - your words 'hit the spot'!!!! My family and friends will 'eat their words' and i will be sooooo happy to spoon feed them ha ha ha When they see how happy we are together they will all be jealouse and you are right 'I WILL NEVER WALK ALONE.... I HAVE MY HABEEBY'. His mother already refers to me as her daughter, they are the most beautiful people i have ever met and all they ask is that i make their son happy for the rest of his life - this will be a doddle because he is my entire world, my best friend, my hero, my love, my everything oh my god i am gushing again - sorry! Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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quote:Originally posted by habeeby: Thank you Micky, i am so excited! I just want to commit the rest of my life to this man, make him happy and care for him! The only 'downer' on this will be the waiting for his visa after we are married - i really don't want to return to England alone but sometimes love is worth waiting for.
Anyway never mind me, how are you sweetheart? Things can only get better for you and remember when you hit rock bottom there is only one way to go and that is 'up up up'! You will get there honey, i know you will
thats the sad part the visa. but i think it is easier for you in england. best wishes. i have waitied now 2 years for my visa. damn usa Posts: 9443 | From: USA...... | Registered: Jun 2006
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All this red tape makes me SICK!!!!! 2 years, i know people who have told lies about their relationship and got the visa in weeks and other people who are honest and truthful and have waited years like you. I think money plays a big part in this - if you have lots of money and you can put a few grand in his bank account and afford a little 'baksheesh' it happens quite quickly. But what about the genuine relationship built on love and not money, it's not worth a penny in some countries!!! Anyway i wish you all the best with this but why has it taken so long ?
Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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we started with a ki visa then we decided to get married a year later so we had to start all over again. it will be our 2nd year anniversary on feb 14 and never could live with him yet. the waiting is agony but it is all worth it .enough about me enjoy your wedding plans girl so happy for you
Posts: 9443 | From: USA...... | Registered: Jun 2006
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Habeeby.. you have every right to gush.. you are soon to be the blushing bride..! Re: your family and friends.. try not to be too hard on them.. I know you are all loved up right now and beginning a new exciting life but you will miss them in your life if you detach from them. I know it hurts the way they are reacting.. Ive had the same happen to me.. You wonder why they cant be happy for you & support your decision.. but when the going gets tough you need your fam & friends.. (scousers are the rough diamonds of the earth & so long as you keep a channel open to them they will be there for you.) During the next couple of years you will have lots of ups & downs,disappointments, obstacles & challenges in life..
Re: visa - Make sure you have as much evidence of your relationship as poss,inc. photos, phone cards, bills letters of acceptance from hubbys fam. members. It helps if you have employment, a permanant residence in UK, are not dependant on any gov. benefits and between you, have self sufficiant finances to support you both.
Does he have skills/trade to find employment when he's there.. The transition to UK will be very hard for him to begin with re: cultural differences, the weather, and he will miss the social interaction with his family & friends.. Lots to think about, but put it all on hold for now and enjoy. Just be realistic, be prepared to work together and be understanding of one another and you will be fine.
Posts: 164 | Registered: May 2007
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Micky A my wedding day will be feb 14 ditto.....
Marmia i have a professional career and my own home although i am not very good with my finances i buy too many clothes, shoes and bags!!!! I literally spend what i earn.... He had a Masters degree in physiotherapy and sports massage. I have though about how hard the transition to UK will be for him and i know we will have some difficult times but we will be there for each other and anyway it is not forever, we plan to return to Egypt in 5 years when my daughter is settled in University. We plan to open our own business in Sharm, can't wait. i could have got a bank loan to do this now but he would not let me he says that it is his job to provide for me so when he is here and working we will live off my money and save his for the business and an apartment. I know though that he will be counting the days till we return to Sharm, but i will also Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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valentines day how romantic its my anniversary 2 years. what made you pick this day any way we will be able to celebrate each year together
Posts: 9443 | From: USA...... | Registered: Jun 2006
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For sure, we will celebrate together... I picked this day because it is valentines day, it is also my daughters birthday and she was flattered that we will marry on her birthday. Also the number 10 is my lucky number and my birthday is 10 days after this date and my fiancees birthday is 10 days after that - i think i am a mad woman Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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quote:Originally posted by yorkshire rose: HI there i hired my dress in Alex, it was so beautiful everyone was asking iff id brought it from europe, they actually put lace straps on it to hide my big arms, im sure when the day comes you will go for the day to the beautician and you will have youre fiances family with you to lace you up, i had also the kind where youre laced up at the back, it was fab, i recomend acacia beautician, i was like a princess, they made my time and me wonderful, sorry to say it , but i never felt as beautiful, they were wonderful in this salon, just have a fab day, i would do it over and over, i miss it now and spend my time gazing into windows looking at wedding dresses, heheh i didnt see one so far that was like mine, i wanted chiffon, and i had it, i will try to send fotos iff you like have a wonderful time
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: Yes i will have seperate wedding parties for the women and for the men. I am a christian and he is a muslim but my wedding in Alexandria will keep traditional egyptian for his family and our friends, i think this is only fair as i am in his country.
I find this quite strange, that you are having separate wedding parties for men and women when you are marrying your resort masseuse orfi husband, when this type of wedding party is very rare in Egypt and normally only held by very religious Egyptians!
Also, I wonder if you have checked out the legality of signing a legal marriage contract when you are already married under an orfi contract? Last I heard, you had to get divorced and pass required the three month waiting period before remarrying.
Posts: 4576 | From: Cairo | Registered: Jun 2002
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mabrook habeeby you sound so happy with all the plans not long to go now......hope u can get his visa quickly...waiting will be hard for you both. Notice u are from Liverpool (Oh dear)I am from Manchester and have to disagree about the best footie team. We are tough from the North and will fight so i know u will have your nose to the grindstone.......are u both the same age by the way coz that may help with the visa........thanks for your words before about the pics.still trying to take it all in.......my dreams in tatters faith in human nature destroyed.....but yes i will bounce back......one day
Posts: 171 | Registered: Nov 2007
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Newcomer - i believe the seperate wedding parties i am referring to are what we call 'hen and stag' parties in England and they are held prior to the wedding party. This is my insistence not an Egyptian cultural thing as i want my wedding to have a tiny degree of English wedding culture. The main wedding party will be mixed 'of course'.
In respect of my Orfi marriage - this is not registered we only did this because i was travelling from Sharm to Cairo in his car with some egyptian friends who were also male, as you know we had to go through many checkpoints and would have got in trouble because i travelled alone with 3 men so this paper saved problems. Becuse we have not registered this - it does not exist - problem solved. Now i know you will criticise me for travelling with 3 men alone and also that my orfi marriage was not registered but i will tell you prior to doing this i tried to get a flight to Cairo but there were not any available and my fiancee would not allow me to travel on the bus alone so this was the only option. I did not want my orfi marriage registered as it was only done to serve this purpose, it seems in Egypt all officials are happy if you ahve a 'bit of paper'!!!!! Smucks can you please stop 'raining on my parade' let me have this period before my wedding without 'snide remarks' plz Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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quote:Originally posted by habeeby: Newcomer - i believe the seperate wedding parties i am referring to are what we call 'hen and stag' parties in England and they are held prior to the wedding party. This is my insistence not an Egyptian cultural thing as i want my wedding to have a tiny degree of English wedding culture. The main wedding party will be mixed 'of course'.
In respect of my Orfi marriage - this is not registered we only did this because i was travelling from Sharm to Cairo in his car with some egyptian friends who were also male, as you know we had to go through many checkpoints and would have got in trouble because i travelled alone with 3 men so this paper saved problems. Becuse we have not registered this - it does not exist - problem solved. Now i know you will criticise me for travelling with 3 men alone and also that my orfi marriage was not registered but i will tell you prior to doing this i tried to get a flight to Cairo but there were not any available and my fiancee would not allow me to travel on the bus alone so this was the only option. I did not want my orfi marriage registered as it was only done to serve this purpose, it seems in Egypt all officials are happy if you ahve a 'bit of paper'!!!!! Smucks can you please stop 'raining on my parade' let me have this period before my wedding without 'snide remarks' plz
In Egypt, as anywhere, if you talk about a 'wedding party' this isn't what is held before the wedding, that is a henna party here for the women. So you'll pardon me for my misunderstanding as you called them wedding parties.
Whether the orfi marriage is registered or not - and the reason for doing it always is to try to fool some authority figure into thinking that you are legally with a man as his wife, whether it is checkpoint police or hotels - the fact remains that you do have an orfi contract and women have been accused of bigamy in Egypt for having two marriage contracts. This is usually for having two unregistered orfi contracts, but people have also been refused legal civil or Ministry of Justice marriages due to having them. Registered or not, you still have a legal contract and the laws are tightening up on people who get them and think that they are "just a little piece of paper" So are you saying that you haven't been staying with him in Sharm, with or without an orfi contract?
Btw. Asking smuckers to stop making "snide remarks" about your situation, is a once again another case of the pot calling the kettle black after all you have been coming out with on the religion forum recently!
Posts: 4576 | From: Cairo | Registered: Jun 2002
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So are you saying that you haven't been staying with him in Sharm, with or without an orfi contract? - Not your business!!!!!
Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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Asking smuckers to stop making "snide remarks" about your situation, is a once again another case of the pot calling the kettle black after all you have been coming out with on the religion forum recently!
There is a difference between seeing somebody excited and happy about something and trying to spoil it for them and me making comments about religion and paedophiles!
Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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quote:Originally posted by habeeby: There is a difference between seeing somebody excited and happy about something and trying to spoil it for them and me making comments about religion and paedophiles!
The difference - if you actually look back at what you wrote - is that you were making insulting comments about Muslims as a whole, not just talking about religion. And as this is following on from you making insulting comments about Egyptian women and also Russian women, it's not surprising people are getting a little annoyed with you~!
Posts: 4576 | From: Cairo | Registered: Jun 2002
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Well i did try to make this a nice thread but once again it has been hijacked by the 'kids who like to bash other kids sand castles'
Newcomer i am not asking you to like me or my opinions i was just asking for my 'happy thread'to remain that way Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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quote:Originally posted by habeeby: Newcomer i am not asking you to like me or my opinions i was just asking for my 'happy thread'to remain that way
If you can return the favour and stop insulting other people, maybe that would be easier to do. But this is ES, and, as happens in life, what you say in one place affects the overall way that people treat you. It is not compartmentalized into "this is a happy place and everyone must be nice to me here, even if I insult them somewhere else" and "here I can insult people and they will all forget it when I want them to be nice to me". Posts: 4576 | From: Cairo | Registered: Jun 2002
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Egybrit thanks for your kind words.... Let's leave the football thing alone eh we will ever agree ha ha ha i have this argument all the time with my best friend who is from Manchester.... We are not the same age, he is youner but not by much and luckily i do not look my age so everybody assumes that we are the same age! I know you will bounce back Egybrit, as you said we are from the North and anybody who messes with us will only do this once, we are tough customers and don't forget that!!!! I will PM you my number if you need to talk i have a good listening ear?
p.s. i think Smucks meant that my 'movie' was about to end.... she was being cynical....
Newcomer you don't have to be nice to me just acting like i don't exist will do thanks.....
Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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quote:Originally posted by habeeby: i could have got a bank loan to do this now but he would not let me he says that it is his job to provide for me so when he is here and working we will live off my money and save his for the business and an apartment.
Habeeby I am sceptical about any man working in the Egyptian tourist industry, so this is not personal to your man. However I am just trying to get my head around this statement and its not making sense. If this man is all you say he is then he should be providing for you from his income and then you can save for any future business IN YOUR NAME. If he has a problem with that then ask why?
The wedding dress sounds fine but Alex can be very cold in February and a fur stole may be better than a lace wrap.
Posts: 3809 | From: Paradise | Registered: Mar 2003
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Penny it was my siggestion that we live off my earnings as i already have this under control everything is paid direct debit from my bank and i do not want the hassle of changing this also everything, my house etc is in my name and i will not change this because i need some security... The business in the future will be in joint names and i have a friend who is a business lawyer to take care of all this as i am already aware that God forbid should anything happen to him in Egypt it is difficult for a Christian to inherit from a Muslim. For this reason i have my friend working on all these details on my behalf also i will continue to have my own bank account and 50% of the business earnings will go into my account. I am an independant woman and under no circumstances will i give up my independance.....
p.s. thanks for the tip about the fur stole Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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quote:Originally posted by habeeby: Penny it was my siggestion that we live off my earnings as i already have this under control everything is paid direct debit from my bank and i do not want the hassle of changing this also everything, my house etc is in my name and i will not change this because i need some security... The business in the future will be in joint names and i have a friend who is a business lawyer to take care of all this as i am already aware that God forbid should anything happen to him in Egypt it is difficult for a Christian to inherit from a Muslim. For this reason i have my friend working on all these details on my behalf also i will continue to have my own bank account and 50% of the business earnings will go into my account. I am an independant woman and under no circumstances will i give up my independance.....
p.s. thanks for the tip about the fur stole
Ok understand but he can at least pay for food so he feels he is providing for you. Dont forget he will get rights under Uk law to your UK property both on divorce and on inheritance. Its easy to be worried about the Egyptian side of things and forget the UK laws and if you have already had to fight under one divorce then you know what he could become entitled to. I think Pre nuptial contracts have alot to be said for them in these situations.
There are legitimate ways around the Egyptian inheritance laws, if you ever need any advice in the future feel free to give me a PM
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pre-nup in respect of my property in England is already in the process because my home is for my children in the future not for anybody else it is their nest egg. Thanks for that Penny and i will PM you if i need to, thanks again Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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I know you are probably saying why is she telling us this? What has this got to do with us? But i have to share it with someone and i have no family and most of my friends disapprove of my marrying Egyptian so sorry guys i have to tell you lot!!!![[Frown]](frown.gif)
I have tried to pick a modest dress but i do not do meringue dresses so it is very figure hugging in fact i cannot breathe in it!!!! I have asked them to design the front to be a little higher so my 'dumplings are not boiling over' but the top is a basque style so my shoulders, arms, etc are bare plz advise me before it is made so i can make any appropriate alterations i do not wish to cause any problems with my fiancee's family or friends and i cannot discuss the dress with him as it is 'bad luck'!!!![[Smile]](smile.gif)
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Anyway i expect that the weather may be a little breezy in February so i may need a wrap....
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Enrique Englasias Forgive!![[Confused]](confused.gif)
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any way we will be able to celebrate each year together
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