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For all of you that have been successful in getting you man or women home, what advice can you give to the ones that are waiting to make the transition easier for all. Did you introduce him to friends, family right away? How much of a culture shock was it for them being in another country? Did it take long to adjust? Was their disagreements at first?
Posts: 1369 | From: California | Registered: Aug 2007
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quote:Originally posted by elizabethN: For all of you that have been successful in getting you man or women home, what advice can you give to the ones that are waiting to make the transition easier for all. Did you introduce him to friends, family right away? How much of a culture shock was it for them being in another country? Did it take long to adjust? Was their disagreements at first?
After the jetlag is over, you have to set him straight about naps in the middle of the day. Arabs love their naps since they are used to split workdays.
My husband was not shocked about most things simply because we discussed a lot of things the year before we even filed for the visa and then continually afterwards.
I guess my husband had to adjust quickly because there was not really any of my family around and I was about to deliver our daughter and he was basically alone taking care of us both the first month after we left the hospital. Quick reality check I suppose.
He found work fairly quickly but then we live in a large city and its really not that hard to find. He has since changed jobs and has been promoted and given raises, etc. So things are going well for him in that respect.
Something funny that happened (I hope he doesn't see this LOL). He rode his bicycle and kind of got lost and ended up on the freeway. For those of you from large cities, you will understand what I mean by a freeway with loops. Of course he was not supposed to be up there and realized quickly that he needs to exit. LOL Luckily, he was fine but a bit embarrased. Needless to say, we never discussed walking or riding bicycles on the freeway!
He misses "his" food. There are arabic restaurants here where we live but nothing Egyptian that we can locate. There used to be a couple of Egyptian restaurants but since have closed. Anyways, he misses things like the carts in the street with the weird sandwiches that I will not discuss cause it makes me ill to think about it, koshary from the carts, tamia and foul like the Egyptians make it. Things like that.
At first, he had a hard time understanding a particular language here and occasionally he is not understood with his thick accent. His co-workers and employers love him to death and are always asking questions about Egypt and the culture etc. They have never offended him by being racist or anything like that. Of course there are always the idiot co-workers no matter where you are from.
He misses his family the most and keeps in touch with them by cam/internet weekly and phone cards are a blessing which he uses to call about twice a week to his family.
I give him full emotional support and yes we have disagreements all the time about things but we discuss them and of course I am always right and get my way. Just kidding. He is a great husband and father to our daughter.
We will return to Egypt for a visit probably in 2009 and he will have to go back to another shock of how his family has "grown" and his country has changed in just a few years. Posts: 525 | From: USA | Registered: Sep 2005
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how wonderful! Congradulations on the baby. How exciting that must of been. Coming their just in time. Does he like it in the U.S.? Does he talk about moving back to Egypt? How long has he been here?
Posts: 1369 | From: California | Registered: Aug 2007
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Yeah I panicked in the end of the pregnancy cause I was not receiving the medical care I felt I needed and we split quickly. We were going to wait a few months but then I really got to thinking about how long it would take the embassy to do the birth record for her and passport. FOREVER! So we left and almost one month after we arrived she came.
He likes it. He doesn't complain but sometimes the people get on his nerves. They get on mine too. LOL No, he doesn't talk about moving to Egypt, just visting. After all the shootings at the schools here, I may suggest we go there when our daughter is ready for high school. At least she will be safer there. It just depends what things are like in 14 years.
He has been here for 17 months.
Is your fiance/husband with you?
Posts: 525 | From: USA | Registered: Sep 2005
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not yet. His visa was approved February 3 and should come any day now. I just love to hear the real stories of experienced women who have gone through the whole process up to finally being together here in the U.S. My first husband was Iranien, we met in college and he was already here for about 8 months. The first I would say - 1 year was hard getting adjusted to a muslim man and we had some fights over who was gonna control what. After that things settled down and with 2 daughters and a business together we did pretty good. Was married 17 years then divorced. I was re-married February 12, 2006 to a egyptian man.
Posts: 1369 | From: California | Registered: Aug 2007
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Wow my husband and I are still going thru transitions since he came here in April of 2007. I really thought I had prepared him for everything but that was not the case. Some things were so minor like you do not need to shake my dads hand every time you see him, just the first time will do. Others were bigger, like not giving your routing and account number for the bank to anyone online. Another time he got a “job” offer where he was told he would be a secret shopper and they wanted him to go to money gram and send money to someone and rate the person doing the transaction. They sent him a check for like 1600 bucks and told him to put it in his bank account and then send 1500 to the person he was supposed to send it to but he had to do it within 3 days. The extra 100 was for him to keep as payment. I tried so hard to explain to him that it was a scam and that the check wasn’t real and that it takes a check 10 days to clear so they would get his 1500 before he realized it was a bad check. Luckily even thou he didn’t understand he trusted me and we put the check in his bank and sure enough it was a fake check from a fake bank.
I have learned that the best way to help your husband or wife when they come is to tell them every way a person will try and scam them. It amazes me how many people have tried to do this to him.
At least he has learned. The other day he was applying for a credit card on line and they asked for his bank information and he said out loud I know you and closed the web site.
I know this isn’t earth shattering advise but it will help your pocket book.
Posts: 14 | From: america | Registered: Jan 2008
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Just kidding. He is a great husband and father to our daughter.
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