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Is there some truth to it or not especially when it comes to forming a long-lasting and happy relationship between a couple?
What attracted you in the beginning especially about your partner and do you continue to appreciate it still?
young at heart Member # 10365
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I know in my case I like him because he's got brown skin black hair and brown eyes, he likes my white skin, blonde hair and green eyes, opposites in looks! does that count.
Tigerlily Member # 3567
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I thought you'd go more into depth, YAH, I wasn't really talking about the outside looks. Yani you don't marry someone because he or she looks only pretty, right?
How about your different characters, life experiences, hobbies, habits, food likings, etc. if you have them then? How do you make it work?
desertgirl Member # 12450
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My husband and I met each other at university when we were 18 years old. It was like love at first sight ... It took us some time ... lol ... to realize we were / are verrrrry different ... I will try to describe HOW different ; he is the nervous type, can't sleep well , worrying about his operations (he is a surgeon)and his patients at night, strict parent, alwaysssss has to be busy. Very sportive (mountainbiking, skiing, kiteboarding,running, snowboarding, ...) and (probably cause his sign of the Zodiac is Libra ) always having doubts about buying stuff, going back to the shop 3 times before he has decided to make his choice ... lol Me, I am the lazy type , don't always have to doooo things, enjoy doing nothing at all can lay for hours on the beach, chatting to friends, never in a hurry, not strict as a parent, giving kids the freedom they can handle ... a bit sloppy , can decide in 10 seconds what to buy in shops ... After 11 years of marriage, we know we are veryyy different ... and you know, we just tease each other about this cause we think we are 'completing' the other one... We feel so much connected and we think feeling good together is the most important thing ! We can always count on each other ... so different characters and different hobbies don't really matter ... Just when booking trips we disagree sometimes He needs to do adventurous things! Our next trip to Egypt he wants to do safari in Sinai desert, sleeping underneath the stars, ... sounds very adventurous but that's not the trip I want... So I think I will be laying at the pool of some nice hotel enjoying the sun and he can do some kitesurfing in Red Sea After all, I am the one who books the trip
Korven. Member # 11013
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I once was told, to marry a lady who has love to give better than to marry one who needs love or else we will frustrate each other ...
young at heart Member # 10365
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Tiger, ofcourse there is alot more between us. We love each other very much. What I said was light hearted, because of our different looks, we joke about it! You can't base a relationship on looks alone.
Sparkle16 Member # 13047
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I agree, I think differences are a good thing, for example, I can be serious and my husband is a joker, so when something is bothering me and I am very worried about it, he says something funny and makes me laugh and it helps. I think it is important that the values, lifestyle expectations,beliefs are similar but the rest of the aspects of a relationship are the things one has to work on to truly understand another person. Looks are important for the first five minutes!!!
With a name like Smuckers Member # 10289
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My husband and I thought we were exact opposites, after being married coming up on 2 years this fall, I find we are more alike that originally thought. Some cultural differences, of course, but our nature and personalities are very similiar, who would have guessed?
????? Member # 12336
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The longer you are with each other the longer you`re going to look like each other. It`s natural behaviour! But this is about attraction. Do opposites attract? I think it depends on the personality. Some need more challenge and are curious by nature, and a person who seems to be totally different offers them that goal... Others love safety and will feel better by someone who is more predictable, without surprises...
little surfer girl Member # 12820
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I was attracted to my fiance because of the calming effect he has on me. We are total opposites in that respect. I am a total spaz from a very loud, yet loving, family. He is soft spoken and gentle. Even in difficult situations. I kept thinking that I was freaking him out when we were fist together, but, he loved my "energy" and said that it helped to complete him. I feel the same way. Yes, we are opposites, and I wouldn't have it any other way!
Gecko Member # 13688
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well all of us different zat means wut attract me may doesnt attract u ..i support wut lily said about the value of character in relations but it doesnt mean zat there is 1 type of characters that attract others i may be attracted to kind gurl who obey me..my friend may be attracted to a gurl who is strong who always give orders well every one searches for his choose
Bonzo Member # 12594
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For the longest time I thought that being opposites was the best type of relationship to have because you balance each other out. I was wrong. I met someone who is so much like me and it's so nice to have someone who really understands how I think and feel about things. For the first time in my life I am able to completely be "me" and my only regret is that I didn't meet him in my younger years. We are complete opposites in appearances (he's Egyptian, I'm a blonde, blue-eyed American) but on the inside we are so in tuned with each other. :-) He really puts my soul at ease.
With a name like Smuckers Member # 10289
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I agree, the opposities issue of balancing each other out might work sometimes but ultimately I think you need to see eye to eye and have an understanding of each other to make things last, that is more difficult being so different. I can sometimes tell by the look in my husbands eyes what mood he's in or what he's thinking, thankfully because he isn't a big talker.
Sobriquet Member # 13217
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I believe so to some extent: Attitude(minor things), appearance, demeanor and even mentality.
However the heart and compassion must be one. I am sharing my opinion here and I believe in individualism but the feelings of love must be reciprocated
50-50
One could be stubborn … no problem One could be extra horny (me) .. no problem One could be calm … no problem One could be feisty … no problem
these are mere examples
Love - any kind of love must not be opposite but on the same page
Rights - must also be one the same page
Compassion - Must also be on the same page
And allow me to elaborate about 'compassion' it is very simple because we have our good moments and bad moments. I simmply believe it is very important and wise to identify this matter. You know an extra hug here and there, making breakfast, giving some one a day of from everything and so on. The hell with this world and the responsiblities, money comes and money goes the person in front of us is all that matters - a hug goes a long way at the right time - a smart man/woman knows the right time
Now if the other is that much of an opposite and he/she doesn't know that fact - then ....
posted ![[Wink]](wink.gif)
) always having doubts about buying stuff, going back to the shop 3 times before he has decided to make his choice ... lol![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)