I met my Egyptian Soulmate in March - he is the most perfect man i have ever met, sometimes i think too good to be true!!! Anyway i have returned to Egypt 5 times this year (can't get enough of his sweet words) i a now making plans to marry him in February. I can honestly say that i would never even consider an English man again - thumbs up to Arabian Princes
Posted by Anthropos (Member # 9410) on :
Yes they are indeed sweet - just remember that there is more to life than sweet words!!!
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
Habeeby, where did you meet?
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Yes, habeeby, all the best for the future for the both of you!
Well and you definitely make the airline happy too - 5 times to Egypt since March? Wow!!!! Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Yes, yes... That's the most frequent question these men ask, "WHEN WILL YOU COME, LOVE?" Posted by egypt 2007 (Member # 14398) on :
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: I met my Egyptian Soulmate in March - he is the most perfect man i have ever met, sometimes i think too good to be true!!! Anyway i have returned to Egypt 5 times this year (can't get enough of his sweet words) i a now making plans to marry him in February. I can honestly say that i would never even consider an English man again - thumbs up to Arabian Princes
Hi ,, to to am planning the same as you, visit egypt and fella for a year and go from there, can you tell me what you do while in egypt and visiting,, ie vist family , friends, where do you stay with him or in another flat...
Posted by Leito (Member # 14189) on :
You remind me of south london male. Lol.
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
Leito behave! Give the girl a chance!!
Posted by Leito (Member # 14189) on :
! I was just commenting on the ,, .. case !
Posted by F uckup Hotline What can i do for U (Member # 14028) on :
wish u all guys the best but most important question saw it here was where did u meet and what does he do for living then i can see the future amr
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
I met him at Baron Palms Hotel, he is a masseur with magic hands (ha ha). I stay with him in Delta Sharm near Namma Bay, we tend to stay together although i know this is not allowed. His best friend is a lawyer and he has some paperwork made up that states we are married this means that we do not have problems, i mean you have to live with any man before you marry him don't you? Anyway he is a physiotherapist so i am assuming that he will not have any problem getting work when he comes to England. We are planning on staying in England for 5 years until my daughter goes to University and then we will return to Sharm to live happily ever after Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Hi Egypt 2007 - I stay in Delta Sharm with him when i visit. It is a 5*Complex that is residential, mostly Egyptian men with european wives. I have stayed there 4 times and i love it, this is where i hope to live when i go to Egypt in 5 years, we will buy an apartment there. When i am in Sharm we tend to go out socialising with his friends and their wives, you will find that Egyptians are very sociable people and you sometimes struggle to get time together alone. I have stayed with his famiy for a few days and also with hte family of his best friend in Cairo. They have always made me welcome and seem to accept my English culture. We attended a family wedding in Cairo last time i was there and i ended up dancing with the men!! i wonder what the women thought of this? My boyfriend tells me they were jealouse of my character wishing that they could be more outgoing like me - i don't know whether this is true but i trust him to tell me the truth. He is very westernised so he does not object to my behaviour although he struggles when i wear a skirt thinking that if a fall over all of Egypt will see my bottom ha ha. I just find this sweet as i tend to do my own thing anyway - he keeps telling me i am a crazy english woman and i will put him in the hospital, i say we will see!!!!
Posted by bettyN (Member # 14096) on :
reality sets in on all relationships. Right now you are in the honeymoon phase which lasts 12-18 months. You will have some culture differences and problems down the road no doubt about it. You need to take the blinders off.
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
All relationships have problems - i was previously in a 17 year relationship with an English man who turned out to be a lying cheat who risked my health because he never used protection when he was sleeping around.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by bettyN: reality sets in on all relationships. Right now you are in the honeymoon phase which lasts 12-18 months. You will have some culture differences and problems down the road no doubt about it. You need to take the blinders off.
Yes I agree with what was said above.
BTW, bettyN, have you been visiting Egypt last month?
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
yes i was in Cairo in October, first time i Cairo would not go back. Did the pyramids and the Nile so don't see the point in returning to Cairo it is busy, noisy and dirty. Interesting culture though!
Posted by Sashyra88 (Member # 11693) on :
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: yes i was in Cairo in October, first time i Cairo would not go back. Did the pyramids and the Nile so don't see the point in returning to Cairo it is busy, noisy and dirty. Interesting culture though!
But Cairo is more Egypt than any of the resorts. Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Yes i agree that is why i said it was interesting but once you have seen it you have seen it. I prefer the resorts with the beaches, pools, bars and tourists. I could quite happily live in Sharm but i could never live in Cairo, i have got Egyptian friends who say they hate the place in fact i seem able to tolerate Cairo more than they can but that's probably because the place intrigues me.
Posted by Snapdragon (Member # 9036) on :
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: yes i was in Cairo in October, first time i Cairo would not go back. Did the pyramids and the Nile so don't see the point in returning to Cairo it is busy, noisy and dirty. Interesting culture though!
To get a real feel of your fiance's cultural and background you need to live in a "non-tourist" city for at least 1 year.
That should give you a reality check real quick!
Posted by Snapdragon (Member # 9036) on :
oops that is supposed to be 'culture'
Posted by cbrbddd (Member # 3891) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra88:
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: yes i was in Cairo in October, first time i Cairo would not go back. Did the pyramids and the Nile so don't see the point in returning to Cairo it is busy, noisy and dirty. Interesting culture though!
But Cairo is more Egypt than any of the resorts.
I agree sashyra!!! And there is lots to do in Cairo . . . waaaaaaaaaaaaay more than those resorts! But some of us like to do more than sunbathe, etc, etc Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Sorry guys i could not cope in a non-tourist city i like the sunbahing tooooooo much. Forgot to mention though love the museums in Cairo it would take me a life time to see all the exhibits.
Posted by F uckup Hotline What can i do for U (Member # 14028) on :
fair enough let us know how he react when you tell him you have big problem you out of money and you need to move to egypt to live with him and he will need to support u in Egypt
i will give him around max of month to 2 to leave you its really up to your body figures and your boobs size sorry for breaking the bubble
by the way is he younger then you?
cheers amr
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
No no staying in a village in Egypt would be the ultimate culture shock! I am sure you'd give up dancing with other men in no time and you just wanna leave!! Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
He already knows that i am out of money he has had to pay for the last two times that i have visited him Yes he is younger than me but so was my English ex i tend to go for younger men as i do not look my age. The plan is that he should come here for approx 5 years until my daughter is settled in uni and then we will return to live in Sharm and yes he will have to support me but he seems fine with this, the only problem he has is that he does not wish to come to england but i have told him its my way or the highway Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: Anyway he is a physiotherapist so i am assuming that he will not have any problem getting work when he comes to England.
LOL: do you really think the UK NHS is going to employ an unqualified Egyptian massure.
Wake up Physio's do not work in tourist hotels. He stands very little chance of gaining a VISA to the UK and even if he is one of the lucky few that do, he is going to struggle to find work.
There is something seriously wrong if he has no problem with you dancing with other men at the wedding in Cairo. Don't think this means he is liberal and broad minded. The Egyptian man does not exist that will accept his wife dancing with other men. As for what the women thought...do you really want to know?
Its not your fault you have come in contact with a culture that you know little about but your post sadly shows you know so very little and this man is obviously just in for the fun of the ride.
Try what Amr suggests and see what his reaction is, only problem is he will know your not serious because you have a young daughter.
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Hi Tigerlily, i could not ive in a village in Egypt and yes you are correct it is a culture shock, i did not mind it for a short time to visit family and friends but i could never live there permanently, however i could live in Delta Sharm near Namma Bay that's more my cup of tea. He appears to understand this as he says he would never ask me to live anywhere else as he knows that i have many friends there and i am comfortable in the surroundings - you know pool, beach, bars, etc
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by F uckup Hotline What can i do for U: fair enough let us know how he react when you tell him you have big problem you out of money and you need to move to egypt to live with him and he will need to support u in Egypt
i will give him around max of month to 2 to leave you
Exactly.
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Penny, u misunderstand me he is a qualified Egyptian Physiotherapist and he previously worked in a Hospital. I am sure of this because i have a copy of his qualifications. He originally qualified as a masseur and worked in the tourist industry but because of the problems that some of the masseurs can be exposed to from tourists, Russian women in particular, he then trained as a physiotherapist and worked in the hospital unfortunately he realised that he could earn more money in the tourist industry because of the tips so he returned on the understanding that he only makes medical massage this reduces the number of women and men he is exposed to that request 'special massage' and get stroppy when refused. When i am in Sharm i got to work with him and work in the health club so i have witnessed the problems that some of these masseurs have in respect of this. What these people do not realise is that if they complain to the GM when they are refused 'special massage' the masseur can lose his job as the customer is always right. I have seen masseurs asked to take time off work and only return when the guest has left due to their refusing the requests of the guest.
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
'Special massage'- mmmmmmm.... Ooops! Sorry, sorry - I'm gone! Posted by esso7 (Member # 12215) on :
habeebey he needs only the visa , u can get into the relation but 4get abt love and u r the best bla bla bla bla ,he wants visa and u want fun so u can exchange ,try he doesnt abuse u more than a visa ,good luck if u need anything also in egypt i am here but all guys in sharmin hurghada seeks 2 abuse ladies ,i have many freinds were abused hope u dont be one of the ladies abused ,enjoy ur life but 4get abt a serious relation
Posted by esso7 (Member # 12215) on :
hehe dont think he will refuse a special massage unless the lady is really very horrible
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Thanx. But where is the end of the queue? Can't see.......
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
esso7 have you seen these Russian women ???? i think most men would refuse even their own husbands if not why are married women wanting to pay for 'special massage' ????? esecialy when they have a husband and children sitting by the pool !!!! i am not prudish but i think it is disgusting Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Makbeta i think you better go and take a cold shower before you explode Anyway you would never get past all the Russians to find the front of the queue - wot queue they don't believe in queueing do they ?????? Posted by esso7 (Member # 12215) on :
still an egyptian guy would enjoy sex with a white meat especially if he will be paid ,these massage workers represent the lowest level in the egyptian society ,i have a british freind was abused by a masseur in hurghada ,pm me ur email if u wanna know more
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Honey, I was joking... Sounds exciting though - this 'special massage'....- some wouldn't hesitate a second,eh? Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
esso7 r the fingers on your hand all the same????
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Makbeta r u insinuating that i am in receipt of 'special massage' u make me blush ha ha
Posted by esso7 (Member # 12215) on :
i am ready 4 special massage hehe
Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
Habeeby even if he has an Egyptian qualification have you researched if the NHS will accept it? The UK qualification is at degree level now and involves alot of equipment that he may not have worked with in Egypt.
Are you aware that within his culture/ religion he should not be giving a massage to ANY women whether for medical reason or otherwise. Would he accept that you had a massage from another man?
Sadly Esso is right but you probably don't want to hear it. Keep it for fun but think carefully before you build your life and your daughters around it.
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Esso7 why do you assume all egyptian men want white meat??? Maybe they just want european women because they don't let themselves go when they marry like a lot of egyptian women. I have Egyptian friends who have married Egyptian and they marry this beautiful svelte dusky woman who turns into the side of a house within 1 year of marriage, no wonder they cover up!!!!! Posted by esso7 (Member # 12215) on :
habeeby keep it 4 un but dont enter in a relation that will hurt u later ,enjoy the guy the pool ,the special massage hehe but really dont hurt urself with that relation
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Huh, this thread is turning a little ugly now....
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Penny his qualification is at degree level and i have researched this with friends who are currently employed as Nurses in the NHS i gave them a copy of his qualifications and i was told that they will be accepted, he also has references from the hospital in Cairo where he was employed for some time. I am also aware that in his culture he should not be giving massage to any woman and for this reason his family do not know they think he still works in the hospital - he just omitted to tell them. He would not accept that i had a massage from another man and although i think this is silly i accept this. Penny if this man was English would you be saying the same things to me ?????
Posted by massenburg (Member # 10776) on :
quote: Habeeby even if he has an Egyptian qualification have you researched if the NHS will accept it?
It even gets worse, there are 14,000 doctors still looking for jobs - 4,000 of which were UK graduates.
Special Massage I'm not getting a warm fuzzy feeling by this.
It's probably best that I don't ask what exactly a special massage is.
I guess sometimes ignorance really is bliss.
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Listen guys i apologise for what i said about Egyptian women and i appreciate your advice but i am not a silly teenager who is carried away with sweet words and a good looking man. I have made the decision for him to come to England so that i can get to know him properly before i commit to living in Egypt with him, if he comes to England and leaves me so be it..... I could have a similar experience in England with an English man - in fact i have some time ago. This is why i am cautiouse, i do not trust easily and unfortunately i have given this man a really hard time by double checking everything he has told me. I turn up in Sharm without giving him prior warning, i have met all his friends and family. I have taken my own friends with me to meet him and they have given him the third degree, as of this time he has passed all the tests therefore he is either exceptionally clever, very lucky or just genuine !!!!!
Posted by esso7 (Member # 12215) on :
i think he is very clever ,habeeby the visa might not be only reason but many others ,accompanying u ,having fun going to goodplaces ,believe me the msseurs in sharm represent the desperate egyptian from a bad back ground ,anyway i hope my words are wrong and god make u choose the better decision 4 u
Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
Habeeby no of course I would not say these things if he was English because you would be entering a relationship from a level playing field, same education and economic opportunities, and you would understand each others culture and language. He may speak perfect English but that doesn't mean he understands all you say.
The enormity of contemplating bringing this man from Egypt to the UK is such a big step and you have to take responsability for bringing him. Supposing he is just another VISA hunter think how that can impact on your country and other genuine applicants. What about your daughter and the effect on her.
Unfortunately you will find the system is stacked against you and the only way to get the reassurance you want about him is to live in Egypt with him, but that's not a viable option with a 13 year old daughter.
You are planning marriage next February but most of what you post points to very little understanding of his Egyptian culture. Your comments about Egyptian women are so insulting and show further how little you understand of their way of life.
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Esso7 he says thank you for saying that he is very clever he takes this as a compliment he has a sister who is a Doctor and a brother who is a lawyer so i do not think he is from a bad background. As for "accompanying me, going to goodpaces" i accompany him and he pays!!!! When we go out i am usually in the company of his friends who are mostly intelligent professional people and a few who are from "the lowest level in egyptian society" they are good people with a clear heart which is more important to me than pretentiouse upper level of egyptian society. Thank you for your advice and i wil keep it in mind while i am lying by the pool watching him run around after me like i am some sort of princess Posted by Sashyra88 (Member # 11693) on :
Josette??? Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Penny my comments about Egyptian women were insulting and uncalled for and i have apologised to everybody for that - i will apologise again - Sooo Sorry. Yes i do have little understanding of his cuture but because i wish to try to make a reationship with this man i am trying to be open to learning about his culture and accept some - not all - of his beliefs. My daughter has met this man and they get on very well in fact in some ways he is a better Father to her than her own Father. If my daughter had not wanted to accept this man he would have been gone from my ife in a flash as she is the most important thing in my life. And yes i am aware that although he speaks perfect Engish he may not understand everything i say but that is also true of English men - women are from venus, men are from mars!!! But due to the language and cultural differences i think that we both put more effort into communicating in order that we can try to understand each other we might not always agree with each other but at least if we have some degree of understanding it helps make a better relationship surely??????
Posted by esso7 (Member # 12215) on :
habeeby wish u the best ,i asorry to say that abt him before understanding the whole siuation , i wish u best of the best ,so ami invited 4 ur marriage hehe ,but anyway there are many cases that failed a european lady in egypt faling in loe thats why i advise u ,ihope u would be lever than him
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Thank you Esso7 for your good wishes and yes u are invited for my marriage!!!! I am aware that there are many Egyptian men who play with the feelings of European women i have seen this myself when i have been there and i feel that it is very sad when this happens. But believe me i am not a naive woman and i do give this man a hard time or as he likes to call it 'the spicy in life' but this is my way of continually testing him so that i can see his reactions. I can tell you he will not have an easy life with me and i think that he may be the one regretting that he ever met me. Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
I have just been thinking maybe it is a family trait - i have 1 sister married to Spanish, 1 sister married to Italian, 1 cousin married to Jamaican and my best friend is married to Pakistani when we get together it will be like united nations ha ha
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
To be fair Habeeby didn't come on here for advice, just to tell her story. Everyone can give they're advice but at the end of the day she knows what's right for her.
Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: To be fair Habeeby didn't come on here for advice, just to tell her story. Everyone can give they're advice but at the end of the day she knows what's right for her.
Maybe but its a public discussion board, and when good old UK is expected to issue another VISA to yet another Gigalo then its not just about what's right for her. As someone pointed out there aren't jobs available in the NHS, even our doctors can't get positions. And please don't say oh he's not a gigalo because any Egyptian man that has his hands all over women for his job is 100% a gigalo by EG standards, especially when he has the chance of other respectful employment. The fact he is lying to his family says it all.
I agree here relationship is her own business but please do we have to have these types imported the UK as a right for these ladies.
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Penny, it's not for me to comment on what I think. I do think he's wrong lying to his family I have to say. Visas are not handed out ten a penny, so if it happens for her it will.
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Ohhhhhhhh pun wasn't intended Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Lying to his family about what?
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
I think about his job in Sharm.
Posted by esso7 (Member # 12215) on :
habeeby its not bt being its abt when u r in love u ue ur feelings more than mind ,some of these women r very smart but in love things differ
Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Lying to his family about what?
He is lying to his family that he working as a physio in Sharm when he is working as a massure. He is also lying to his girlfiend that he can pick and choose his clients in the hotel he works for in that he only needs to deal with the medical cases. Many of the better hotels in Sharm will only employ foreigners to work in their Spa's for the very reason that its against a Muslim man's religion to be touching a woman. Those hotels that employ Egyptians for such duties are the middle of the road ones that can't afford European/forign staff and they certainly aren't going to allow an Egyptian to pick and choose his clients. He said himself he chooses to work in Sharm for the money...that money comes from the tips...not the salary.
Fact.....Massure in Sharm = Gigalo=lowest of the low. What was ????? expresion the other day BMID yes a bad case of BMID
And to Young at Heart you are allowed an opinion, this is an open forum. Honesty may hurt sometimes but better that than turning a blind eye.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
^^^ ohhh I totally missed that...gulp. Not good I must admit. Gosh, some men will lie about things so easily. Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
I think no one has the right to judge her boyfriend because of his profession due to religious reasons. People are needed for this job, the market is out there and since unemployment is high in Egypt he can call himself lucky to be employed by the hotel. Not every masseur is a cheater just like not every doctor is having an affair with the nurse. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Hmmm not sure if I completely agree with you TL. It might matter...it would matter to me.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Mwah.... A woman who has time and money to get to Egypt on holiday 5 times in 8 months in common will not be young. Young women have a job, and not enough money. A massure in a hotel in the Red Sea area....mwah... I've happened to meet some... as soon as I tried to step one foot outside of my room, he was there. Pushing me to get a massage, even for free. Pushing me to go out with him. Try to seek for contact all the time. Another one just got a new (Russian) girlfriend, but didn't pay much attention to her, because I seemed to be more interesting. I didn't know about their reputations at that time, now they don't get even the chance to bother me. For what Habeeby told about her friend, they way they live, the way he acts, I 'wouldn't give him the benefit of doubts. The combination habeeby and that massure IMO is a classic, including the "But I am different"-novel he tells her. But, Habeeby is heavily in love, infected with the BMID-syndrome, and she wouldn't even think about what we are saying. She thinks she is clever enough by making 'tests' for him. Everybody around is bad, except this Egyptian massure. Sure. Habeeby, enjoy your time with him, and don't invest to many emotions (and money!!!). I don't know your massure, and you seem to be pretty convinced about his sincerity. Enjoy it for the time being, wait, see and think.
Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
quote:Originally posted by Tigerlily: I think no one has the right to judge her boyfriend because of his profession due to religious reasons. People are needed for this job, the market is out there and since unemployment is high in Egypt he can call himself lucky to be employed by the hotel. Not every masseur is a cheater just like not every doctor is having an affair with the nurse.
TL I am not judging his 'profession' because of religious resons, in fact I am not judging him but just stating facts. This is not an acceptable 'profession' in Egypt and you have to look at it from an Egyptian cultural perspective and not a European one. Why do you think all the good hotels employ foreigners for this work. I used to know 2 Germans that came and worked in a 5* hotel for a season and many philipinos come as well as they have great skills in this work.
Posted by Zaza (Member # 14378) on :
Habeeby,
I have lived in Sharm for well over a year and am actually moving to Cairo because of the way Sharm and other tourist places have become. Unlike you, I love Cairo with the true Egyptian coulture, the real people and there is so much more to do and see which these tourist site completely lack. Sharm is not real Egypt.....
I know Delta Sharm, never stayed there and would never want to, it is full of Egyptian guys with Older foreign women either taking their money or want the Visa. I am not being harsh here but please be careful as I have seen so many women hurt by the playboys of Sharm.
Please do not underestimate Egyptian women or insult them (I have many as really good friends) and the truth is they laugh at women like you....
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by Penny: TL I am not judging his 'profession' because of religious resons, in fact I am not judging him but just stating facts. This is not an acceptable 'profession' in Egypt and you have to look at it from an Egyptian cultural perspective and not a European one. Why do you think all the good hotels employ foreigners for this work. I used to know 2 Germans that came and worked in a 5* hotel for a season and many philipinos come as well as they have great skills in this work.
Because with a foreigner the hotel can charge way more for the service?
A foreigner means or at least supposed to mean 'great qualifications', it's a status symbol and many Egyptians still have this inferior complex and believe that everything what is non-Egyptian must be automatically better.
You must remember for every foreigner which gets employed one Egyptian is more unemployed.
And as I stated above I don't judge people by what they are professionally doing is 'haram' (since I am not a Muslim myself) but I think that he's owning his money in a respectful way in a profession which is worldwide practised. Hence after all he is not sitting in a shisha cafe all day and playing tawla so he is not lazy!
When I hear that a man works as a masseur it's normal for me, I think about relaxation. Dirty thoughts and thoughts of cheating don't occur to me. A woman who constantly throws jealousy fits because of the job her man is performing is definitely not the right wife for him.
And just to make it clear one more time: Any man can cheat regardless of his profession.
Now no one knows habeeby's boyfriend in person and I can't commend on the other things she posted about him but I do wish her and him well and hopefully the future holds only the best for both of them (now habeeby don't complain we didn't warn you! )
Ah live and let live.
Oh now I am waiting for some woman other than habeeby to show up on this forum who claims to know him much better!! Posted by soozi (Member # 11108) on :
Everything Penny has said here, has made a lot of sense!
The thing that made me wonder about this man, was the dancing with other men, and him not being concerned! Come on, how many other 'genuine' Egyptian men can you see having this mentality, when all his family and friends are around them!
And yes Zaza, I can see why Egyptian women would laugh at women like this. How sad is that? Posted by egypt 2007 (Member # 14398) on :
habeeby ...... i have been having the similar thoughts as you, and to a certain extent have had the same luck with english men, i have now met a fella in Hurghada and he is like your fella a great one and has many sweet words. I have been told by friends to avoid like the plague and like others on here to be very cautious, All i can say to all that you read, you have to have the bad proved to you or you will carry on loving him, I do hope that all works for you and hope you keep in touch thoughout your relationship. I would love to keep in touch and let you know how mine goes. my egyptian fella works in a health club and does massage, he is gorgeous and is alot younger than me... can you tell me your ages. I do have many Muslim friends here in the uk who do say the younger they are or the older you are is a bad sign.... i am taking things slow and we will see what happens, but it is hard to take on board the negative views from people who have had bad experiences already..... Im sure we will see sooner or later.... After all there are good and bad all over the world so how come egyptian men are the worse or so they say....
Posted by ShirleyValentinesFantasyLives (Member # 14207) on :
habeeby, me and my wife write this together. we have been in similar situation a long time ago - and I was judged - but I was not masseur! No way! I worked as diving professional and when I had any female student I asked someone else to check her equipment on her body and never took females alone. Having a foreign wife, these were my rules....NEVER will I allow her to dance with men. That is wrong and makes us both look stupid. I will get a bad reputation from this. I dont even allow her to sit in back of taxi so driver can see her in mirror. NEVER would I stay with her until we were legally married. NEVER would my family allow this in their house. NEVER would my wife be seen swimming without full clothes. NEVER does my wife sit with males alone, or when they come to our house. NEVER does she go to shops alone. But this is not just my demand. She is also muslim, before we married, and so feels very comfortable with all these things. They are also her wishes, and these things are important to our culture. She lived in Egypt a long time and behaved herself. Many Egyptian men told me they had greatest respect for her. Now, I know many of the men are out for all they can get - I am Egyptian, and they feel they can share their secrets with me. One way to tell a genuine one is by his behaviour and what he finds acceptable or not acceptable for his wife to do. Lucky for my wife I was genuine ! Yes there are some ! and we have had a lot of very happy years together Al Hamdullilah there are many more to come. One way to tell if it is genuine - it is very important for us to have a proper marriage day. Everyone is told and there is a big party for relations and friends. And to give her gold. If the man does not want to do this marriage and party it is strange. We hope your man is a good one and you live a happy life with him . It is possible, but even I have problems finding who to trust. Now I live in UK they even con me back in the dear old country!
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Sorry but I've stayed in Delta and not seen it full of older western women with young Egyptians.Just a mixture of all nationalities, including lots of Egyptian families.
Posted by bettyN (Member # 14096) on :
Tigerlily, sorry I don't know your name. Yes I was in Egypt for about 3 weeks. Stayed in Naser city part of the time which I hated and then checked in to my favorite place - The Marriott. My husband will be coming soon, thank god as I am disliking Egypt more and more.
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
Habeeby, You may have found the man of your dreams but he could also turn out to be the man of your nightmare!
I say this as someone who is happily married for 12 years to an Egyptain man. He really is my life and i am his. For us things have worked out really well and we have 3 beauiful children. However i have heard so many horror stories it just makes me sad. I know 5 other women who all met their husbands in Sharm, 3 came to the uk and once the 2 years were up they were gone..... leaving them in debt and broken hearted. the other 2 were denied their visas and were off. I don't mean to sound rude but ALL of these men were alot younger than their wives 10, 15 or even 20 years. They all told these women they don't kids (knowing these women were either to old or already had grown up kids) when they left they either met young women or went back to Egypt and got a young bride and brought her back!! I am not saying your relationship cannot work but i have yet to see it.
Why don't you live in egypt for awhile? Cairo is fantastic, it has such a wonderful atmosphere. My friend is heading to sharm in Dec and i have told her to tell any man that she is intending to live forever there and she is looking for work as she has no money - 99% of them will run! You may think you have tested him but believe me they are clever.
We may be all wrong and he may be wonderful but please be aware what is going there.
The 'dancing thing' with other men really for sure is not a good sign. My hubby is totally relaxed and easy going but in Egypt that is a real bad thing. As is shows a lack respect for him if you are his love and people around watching would not have respected you. My hubby would never want anyone to think bad of me! That really did it for me, sounds like he sees you as 'abit of fun' to everyone around. Sorry.
Take care Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: I met my Egyptian Soulmate in March - he is the most perfect man i have ever met, sometimes i think too good to be true!!! Anyway i have returned to Egypt 5 times this year (can't get enough of his sweet words) i a now making plans to marry him in February. I can honestly say that i would never even consider an English man again - thumbs up to Arabian Princes
So much has been said here so far... Habeeby, is it LOVE or INFATUATION? You will do what you want. If a man (Egyptian, British, Russian, ...) wants to cheat, he will. Even five minutes is enough (hehe ) I may be wrong, but an Egyptian masseur in Sharm or Hurghada ... - high risk factor. But it's up to you...
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
i think i should tell you in respect of the age difference we are not talking 10 or 15 years we are talking 7 years, in respect of the dancing with egyptian men these were his friends and family people that he trusts with his life so it follows that he trusts them with his woman and they are also very good friends of mine, i would never dance with men i did not know as this would be disrespectful to him. I am not a muslim woman i am a christian and if he did not try to understand my culture as i try to understand his he would be history, in respect of the choosing his clients i have been to work with him many times and i know that this is fact unfortunatelly i also know that some women do slip through and proposition him but he deals with this professionally usually introducing them to me as his wife and they are embarassed and cease to proposition him. I also think tht you are being very unfair to his profession he is a very skilled man who chooses to make medical massage because he likes to help people who have medical problems. Yes i know that there are many gigolos in this profession and i know some of them who work in the same health club, the masseurs scold them and tell them that they give their work a bad reputation. My feelings are that if a woman wants to pay for 'special massage' and she knows that is what she is getting and not love then that is her business. My marriage is being planned at the moment by both my family and his, it will be a 'proper marriage' with many of his friends and family and some of my friends and family. I wil then have a secnd marriage in England due to some of my family and friends being unable to travel to Alexandria. By the way i love staying in Deta Sharm it is a 5*complex were many Egyptian and European people stay of all ages and many famillies with children it is not full of older women with younger Egyptian men. I choose to stay there because i have many friends who live their (Egyptian men with European wives mostly similar ages), these are happily married people with children who we socialise with on a regular basis. I am grateful that they cannot see your comments, i think that they would be insulted! Finally why do i have to justify having 5 holidays in 1 year i work very hard in a very stressfull profession and therefore i think that i can have as many holidays as i can afford.
Posted by esso7 (Member # 12215) on :
good luck ,hoping thismarriage would be a successful one
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Habeeby,
Wish you luck. It's your life - you know what's best for you.
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Thanks you sinical lot!!!!! I will invite you to my silver wedding anniversary celebrations hee hee
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Not cynical - sincere Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
No seriously thanks for your sincere advice I know how it looks from the other side i have said to myself many times what advice would i give my best friend if she was in my situation and the answer is BEWARE!!! But only the person involved in the relationship can really know if the relationship is worth working at and that's what any relationship is 'hard work', especially when two different cultures come together. There will always be good times and bad times but if both people are supporting each other through this they can get through the bad times and smile together at the good times. Life is short and people should grab any piece of happiness they can find with both hands and cling on tightly, regrets are no good to anybody!!!
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: No seriously thanks for your sincere advice I know how it looks from the other side i have said to myself many times what advice would i give my best friend if she was in my situation and the answer is BEWARE!!! But only the person involved in the relationship can really know if the relationship is worth working at and that's what any relationship is 'hard work', especially when two different cultures come together. There will always be good times and bad times but if both people are supporting each other through this they can get through the bad times and smile together at the good times. Life is short and people should grab any piece of happiness they can find with both hands and cling on tightly, regrets are no good to anybody!!!
Exactly. People here said this or that - but, I think, we all CARE what will happen to you. Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
I think this topic has been completely exhausted for the time being... But i will keep you all posted in respect of future events - marriage, visa, work, children, etc... Thanks for the advice/concern both positive and negative and i will ponder it between now and my wedding day, god willing...
Posted by OneLoveOnePeople (Member # 9667) on :
What a bitch dissing egyptian women like she is all better than them, honey if u get dissed i will not feel sorry for you....
Posted by GlobalOne (Member # 13363) on :
quote:Originally posted by Makbeta: Yes, yes... That's the most frequent question these men ask, "WHEN WILL YOU COME, LOVE?"
I thought it was " I'M COMING BIATCH!" Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by ShirleyValentinesFantasyLives: I dont even allow her to sit in back of taxi so driver can see her in mirror.
If you both agreed on certain things incl. that she would not go shopping by herself etc. it's your business.
But may I ask about the situation in the taxi? Where is she supposed to sit then? Next to the cab driver or on the roof of the car (sorry lame joke I know)! Seriously I learned from the very beginning ONLY to sit in the back of the car.
Have a good day!
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by bettyN: Tigerlily, sorry I don't know your name. Yes I was in Egypt for about 3 weeks. Stayed in Naser city part of the time which I hated and then checked in to my favorite place - The Marriott. My husband will be coming soon, thank god as I am disliking Egypt more and more.
Tigerlily is fine!
Sorry that your visit didn't work out so well and you were forced to move into a hotel. What happened, you just didn't like Nasr City?
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
You don't have to justify being able to go on holidays 5 times in 8 months. It is said because IMO it is saying something about the person you are. When ppl are in regular jobs, they don't have that much free days. Besides that, they couldn't effort it. It is a economical class indicator! You state to have been working hard to reach this all. All I'm saying is be sure that all what you have been reached by yourself, stays by yourself. These men are not dumb, habeeby. It is very well possible that they see you as a very rich fish, they've caught. And indeed there are families that are having no problems at all to play the game with him. All you have seen untill now is the sight in front of the curtains. You need to know what's behind this. Five holidays in Sharm are not enough to know what man he is. Go and live in Cairo for a while, to know his family better. Don't take every answer as a truth. Just like I said: Wait, listen and see for yourself. Try to find Egyptians outside the touristic area's who are reliable and talk to them, to know what is considered as normal and what isn't. I think you have a lot to learn before taking such a step... It's your life, and you are free to do what you want. But all these advices are to be carefull. Why would people say such a thing??? Not because they dislike Egyptians, but because they know the culture, and they know what happens!
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by Tigerlily: But may I ask about the situation in the taxi? Where is she supposed to sit then? Next to the cab driver or on the roof of the car (sorry lame joke I know)! Seriously I learned from the very beginning ONLY to sit in the back of the car.
Have a good day! [/QB]
On the roof of the car?? LOL I was told the same by an Egyptian; always sit in the back of the car. But I did not listen to his advice; I wanted to be prepared for the worst and judge the driving-skills of taxi-drivers myself. Posted by Oldbag (Member # 9889) on :
quote:Originally posted by ?????: You don't have to justify being able to go on holidays 5 times in 8 months. It is said because IMO it is saying something about the person you are. When ppl are in regular jobs, they don't have that much free days. Besides that, they couldn't effort it. It is a economical class indicator!
You state to have been working hard to reach this all.
.............
Just have to comment on that notion:
Everyone in the UK is BY LAW required to have 20 days holidays a year (including the public holidays) and from sometime now (either now or soon) they will have the public holidays on top of that ie 28 days holidays. In many jobs in the UK, you will have 30-40 days holidays (which includes 8 days of public holidays) so you could easily have a full time job and take 5 holidays a year if they are 1 week at a time. If you can take short notice holidays, then you could do it quite cheaply. You cannot make any assumptions about any UK-based person's wealth or work based on holidays. Didn't check where Habiby is from but I think its the UK
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
Yes, and don't forget some professions (like teachers) have MORE holidays... like 3 and a half months a year... That's why all people hate them. Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by Oldbag:
quote:Originally posted by ?????: You don't have to justify being able to go on holidays 5 times in 8 months. It is said because IMO it is saying something about the person you are. When ppl are in regular jobs, they don't have that much free days. Besides that, they couldn't effort it. It is a economical class indicator!
You state to have been working hard to reach this all.
.............
Just have to comment on that notion:
Everyone in the UK is BY LAW required to have 20 days holidays a year (including the public holidays) and from sometime now (either now or soon) they will have the public holidays on top of that ie 28 days holidays. In many jobs in the UK, you will have 30-40 days holidays (which includes 8 days of public holidays) so you could easily have a full time job and take 5 holidays a year if they are 1 week at a time. If you can take short notice holidays, then you could do it quite cheaply. You cannot make any assumptions about any UK-based person's wealth or work based on holidays. Didn't check where Habiby is from but I think its the UK
5 public holidays between March and November??? Think I'm going to immigrate...lol Serious, public holidays also are expensive holidays. Ticketprices are at least twice as much. But I think it has no use to filter details out.
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
My estimate is 3 months for this one to bite the dust.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: i think i should tell you in respect of the age difference we are not talking 10 or 15 years we are talking 7 years, in respect of the dancing with egyptian men these were his friends and family people that he trusts with his life so it follows that he trusts them with his woman and they are also very good friends of mine, i would never dance with men i did not know as this would be disrespectful to him. I am not a muslim woman i am a christian and if he did not try to understand my culture as i try to understand his he would be history, in respect of the choosing his clients i have been to work with him many times and i know that this is fact unfortunatelly i also know that some women do slip through and proposition him but he deals with this professionally usually introducing them to me as his wife and they are embarassed and cease to proposition him. I also think tht you are being very unfair to his profession he is a very skilled man who chooses to make medical massage because he likes to help people who have medical problems. Yes i know that there are many gigolos in this profession and i know some of them who work in the same health club, the masseurs scold them and tell them that they give their work a bad reputation. My feelings are that if a woman wants to pay for 'special massage' and she knows that is what she is getting and not love then that is her business. My marriage is being planned at the moment by both my family and his, it will be a 'proper marriage' with many of his friends and family and some of my friends and family. I wil then have a secnd marriage in England due to some of my family and friends being unable to travel to Alexandria. By the way i love staying in Deta Sharm it is a 5*complex were many Egyptian and European people stay of all ages and many famillies with children it is not full of older women with younger Egyptian men. I choose to stay there because i have many friends who live their (Egyptian men with European wives mostly similar ages), these are happily married people with children who we socialise with on a regular basis. I am grateful that they cannot see your comments, i think that they would be insulted! Finally why do i have to justify having 5 holidays in 1 year i work very hard in a very stressfull profession and therefore i think that i can have as many holidays as i can afford.
7 years difference is not so bad, however; I must admit that everything else doesn't sound promising. I will agree with HunnyBunny, he could be the greatest & so innocent and everyone could be wrong, but the chances of that being so are SO SMALL you have to ask this: Is what you are willing to risk worth more than you are willing to lose?
Doesn't matter if you danced with his friends, family or anything, especially HIS FRIENDS! A respectable guy would NOT allow that here - generally. Many of the men don't even like their woman to dance in public as it draws the attention and eyes of others and I cannot imagine one saying 'yes, here is my friend, please move your body in rhythm with him and have fun while I watch'. ?? I don't get it. You said it follows that he trusts him...you are projecting your OWN cultural norms onto his...that's how it works in the West maybe, not here at all. You have to deal with him according to his own cultural standards and norms ONLY otherwise he's going to continue to be able to deceive you. That begins with making yourself familiar with what the norms here are. That takes times.
ALSO, I highly recommend finding out what city/village he is from, trying to find someone online from that area and find out as much as you can about his reputation there. Many times these men already have wives there...or just bad reputations in general. You cannot always go on what you feel or see in his family as often times the family can be in on the fact that he is marrying you in order to either obtain a visa or money as they realize they will benefit greatly.
I don't think it's wrong that you travel so often to Egypt, in fact, it's rather good that you are going and see things yourself. I would ask how much he is contributing to your travels, though. Are you visiting his family or just him? How long are you staying? Are you feeling things out from a realistic point of view or just as a tourist?
I agree there are marriages that work and you may have found some that have families and things work well, and yours may be the same. I highly recommend to live in Egypt for a while if possible to get a feel for his culture and his character -- and do NOT get pregnant until you feel you know what you're getting into. One last thing: what he shows you he does at work might not always be what really happens.
People here are not intentionally trying to trash on him, many of us ended up in a lucky situation with our husbands but there are COUNTLESS stories of women (which seems to be the majority) who were duped who would have 'never imagined/expected' it from their 'Egyptian Prince'. You can usually spot key words, if he says things like:
I can't live without you. I will not lose you. I am nothing without you.
These are *usually* not things a serious guy will say (USUALLY, ladies if yours said it please don't attack), as the serious man approaches marriage in a serious way and doesn't treat the relationship as a soap opera. The soap opera guys like to lay it on thick and if he is constantly using romantic words and making you feel dizzy with love, it's not 100% bad but you should encourage him to hold that for when you get married and see what else he has to say.
LAST WORD OF WARNING: if he disses Egyptian woman. Most serious and good men won't do this, others trying to convince you of why they don't want one will not. If he is dissin' Egyptian women in general remember is mother, sister(s), aunt(s) and grandmother(s) are Egyptian, why does he want you to think so badly of the women here if for anything other than his own gain?
Just my opinion. Best of luck.
Posted by Oldbag (Member # 9889) on :
quote:Originally posted by ?????:
quote:Originally posted by Oldbag:
quote:Originally posted by ?????: You don't have to justify being able to go on holidays 5 times in 8 months. It is said because IMO it is saying something about the person you are. When ppl are in regular jobs, they don't have that much free days. Besides that, they couldn't effort it. It is a economical class indicator!
You state to have been working hard to reach this all.
.............
Just have to comment on that notion:
Everyone in the UK is BY LAW required to have 20 days holidays a year (including the public holidays) and from sometime now (either now or soon) they will have the public holidays on top of that ie 28 days holidays. In many jobs in the UK, you will have 30-40 days holidays (which includes 8 days of public holidays) so you could easily have a full time job and take 5 holidays a year if they are 1 week at a time. If you can take short notice holidays, then you could do it quite cheaply. You cannot make any assumptions about any UK-based person's wealth or work based on holidays. Didn't check where Habiby is from but I think its the UK
5 public holidays between March and November??? Think I'm going to immigrate...lol Serious, public holidays also are expensive holidays. Ticketprices are at least twice as much. But I think it has no use to filter details out.
Yes, 2 days at Easter (March/April - varies), 2 days in May and 1 in August. The other 3 are Xmas and New Year. I think in Scotland they get 2 at New Year and don't get August - not sure.
You can get cheap flights all year round if you are in the position of being able to take off at short notice. Some employers allow it - depends on exactly what you do.
I am making the point that in the UK, **no judgement what so ever** can be made about a person's economic situation from the amount of holidays they have.
In fact, in some of the big public sector employers like Local Authorities, employ some of the lowest paid workers in the UK, and have more than 30 days holiday + 8 days public holiday as standard, there is also the possibility of working flexitime in many local authorities which means by working overtime consistently throughout the year, you can end up taking many weeks off. I have one friend who does that all the time, she's in a clock-timed job and by doing 1-2 hours extra on her working days builds up loads of extra days. Also if you work certain types of shifts, you may do 4 days on 4 days off which also allows you with a bit of juggling to get more apparent free time.
And, in fact 2, unless you are a multi-millionaire, you are more likely to have LESS holiday the higher up the tree you are because in many management roles in the UK, your job contract requires you to work the hours that you need to do the job (which can be 24/7) rather than be in a clock-timed job (35-40 hours a week usually).
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Smuckers wrote:
"LAST WORD OF WARNING: if he disses Egyptian woman. Most serious and good men won't do this, others trying to convince you of why they don't want one will not. If he is dissin' Egyptian women in general remember is mother, sister(s), aunt(s) and grandmother(s) are Egyptian, why does he want you to think so badly of the women here if for anything other than his own gain?"
Because Egyptian women are headaches? I heard that too many times from guys!!
Then again it's sad that foreign women are many times too flirty!!!
I think everyone should go after the person he/she thinks would suit best in life/lifestyle. Unfortunately for many Egyptian men it's not an easy task to do due to traditional customs. Guys are still told by their families to marry a good Muslim woman and stay away from tha khawagas.
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
quote:Originally posted by Tigerlily: Smuckers wrote:
"LAST WORD OF WARNING: if he disses Egyptian woman. Most serious and good men won't do this, others trying to convince you of why they don't want one will not. If he is dissin' Egyptian women in general remember is mother, sister(s), aunt(s) and grandmother(s) are Egyptian, why does he want you to think so badly of the women here if for anything other than his own gain?"
Because Egyptian women are headaches? I heard that too many times from guys!!
Then again it's sad that foreign women are many times too flirty!!!
I think everyone should go after the person he/she thinks would suit best in life/lifestyle. Unfortunately for many Egyptian men it's not an easy task to do due to traditional customs. Guys are still told by their families to marry a good Muslim woman and stay away from tha khawagas.
Of course Egyptian women are headaches. Many of us know their rights...and demand them lol Can you imagine the headache this gives to someone who tries to 'escape' from his responsibilities?? Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by Oldbag:
quote:Originally posted by ?????:
quote:Originally posted by Oldbag:
quote:Originally posted by ?????: You don't have to justify being able to go on holidays 5 times in 8 months. It is said because IMO it is saying something about the person you are. When ppl are in regular jobs, they don't have that much free days. Besides that, they couldn't effort it. It is a economical class indicator!
You state to have been working hard to reach this all.
.............
Just have to comment on that notion:
Everyone in the UK is BY LAW required to have 20 days holidays a year (including the public holidays) and from sometime now (either now or soon) they will have the public holidays on top of that ie 28 days holidays. In many jobs in the UK, you will have 30-40 days holidays (which includes 8 days of public holidays) so you could easily have a full time job and take 5 holidays a year if they are 1 week at a time. If you can take short notice holidays, then you could do it quite cheaply. You cannot make any assumptions about any UK-based person's wealth or work based on holidays. Didn't check where Habiby is from but I think its the UK
5 public holidays between March and November??? Think I'm going to immigrate...lol Serious, public holidays also are expensive holidays. Ticketprices are at least twice as much. But I think it has no use to filter details out.
Yes, 2 days at Easter (March/April - varies), 2 days in May and 1 in August. The other 3 are Xmas and New Year. I think in Scotland they get 2 at New Year and don't get August - not sure.
You can get cheap flights all year round if you are in the position of being able to take off at short notice. Some employers allow it - depends on exactly what you do.
I am making the point that in the UK, **no judgement what so ever** can be made about a person's economic situation from the amount of holidays they have.
In fact, in some of the big public sector employers like Local Authorities, employ some of the lowest paid workers in the UK, and have more than 30 days holiday + 8 days public holiday as standard, there is also the possibility of working flexitime in many local authorities which means by working overtime consistently throughout the year, you can end up taking many weeks off. I have one friend who does that all the time, she's in a clock-timed job and by doing 1-2 hours extra on her working days builds up loads of extra days. Also if you work certain types of shifts, you may do 4 days on 4 days off which also allows you with a bit of juggling to get more apparent free time.
And, in fact 2, unless you are a multi-millionaire, you are more likely to have LESS holiday the higher up the tree you are because in many management roles in the UK, your job contract requires you to work the hours that you need to do the job (which can be 24/7) rather than be in a clock-timed job (35-40 hours a week usually).
We have the same. But there are also freelancers who are able to make their own freedays. Or businessowners. Normally people are having 25 free days, and indeed some can work extra hours to get more free time. But, if you have a child to take care of, schoolholidays take away free days also. But in fact this all doesn't matter. In my country a single parent with enough free time and enough money to pay all this, will be at least middleclass.( and rich in the eyes of an Egyptian worker)I understand it doesn't have to be this way in UK?
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Tigerlily he does not dis Egyptian women he just says that although his family would have preferred Egyptian he does not wish to marry Egyptian as they are 'difficult women' especially taking into account his profession which they would ot accept. I have stayed with his family in Alexandria, where he is from and although his Parents speak little English i manage to communicate with them and it would appear that they do not object to me, of course i modify me my behaviour in order that i do not offend. His sisters speak very good English so i get on quite well with them. By the way i always travel in the front of his car unless we are joined by one of his friends and then i travel in the back. I work for the Local Authority and get 6 weeks holiday per year but i work overtime and accummulate extra hours which i then use for my travels. I first went to Egypt 4 years ago and have travelled there many times since as i love the scuba diving, i have dived in the Maldives and all over the carribean but i find the Red Sa is far more superior. In these 4 years i have never responded to the sweet words or amorouse advances of Egyptian men as i was not looking for a relationship, however i met my fiancee and we were friends for some time before i made the decision to enter into a relationship with him in March. Although he is not a rich man he is not as poor as some are an he contributes to my travels in term of the accommodation and all expenses whilst i am there i just pay for my flight and any diving that i wish to do.
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
????? I am middle class but school holidays do not take away from my free days as i sometimes leave my daughter in the care of her Father whilst i go on my travels. I intent to be in s Sharm again for xmas and New Year - i hate the English winter Posted by soozi (Member # 11108) on :
Habeeby, I really don't think you need to defend yourself when it comes to taking holidays etc. (I wish I had a few extra weeks tbh)!! People here just want you to be aware of the pitfalls ahead, maybe things that you haven't thought about!
As said before, maybe your fiance is a great and wonderful man - I sincerely hope he is, and I hope you will come back to us after the wedding with good news. Just be careful, and keep aware.
All the best for your future together Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Thanks soozi
I am aware that our life will not be all hearts and flowers and i am sure tht many problems lie ahead even just in terms of cultural differences but i think that we will try and resolve with communication, a little understanding and a large portion of loooooove Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
Habeeby, I see from your profile you are a SW, in what area do you practice? I'm also a SW
I would have sent you a pm but I see you don't have that facility on your profile
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Almaz.:
quote:Originally posted by Tigerlily: Smuckers wrote:
"LAST WORD OF WARNING: if he disses Egyptian woman. Most serious and good men won't do this, others trying to convince you of why they don't want one will not. If he is dissin' Egyptian women in general remember is mother, sister(s), aunt(s) and grandmother(s) are Egyptian, why does he want you to think so badly of the women here if for anything other than his own gain?"
Because Egyptian women are headaches? I heard that too many times from guys!!
Then again it's sad that foreign women are many times too flirty!!!
I think everyone should go after the person he/she thinks would suit best in life/lifestyle. Unfortunately for many Egyptian men it's not an easy task to do due to traditional customs. Guys are still told by their families to marry a good Muslim woman and stay away from tha khawagas.
Of course Egyptian women are headaches. Many of us know their rights...and demand them lol Can you imagine the headache this gives to someone who tries to 'escape' from his responsibilities??
Yes that's true, but it's something MORE than that. IMO an Egyptian man that tries to use the 'Egyptian women are headaches' line is merely banking on the hope that the foreign woman has the egotism to actually think, 'oh yes and thank God I am so much better than those women who are so different from me, here let me ride in on my white horse and save you from those evil devil-women, thank GOD YOU FOUND ME!'
No. The truth is that in his culture the way they do things is the norm. It might be difficult and it might be making marriages difficult in a soceity that is as financially troubled as Egypt, but the men know very well that the majority of the time this is for the safety of the women. If this Egyptian man was honest and sincere he might say something like, 'look, times are tough in my country, marriages are difficult and expensive, I could save my money and wait a while to marry a good Egyptian girl if I wanted to, as there are good and bad in them the same as any woman'. But the fact that some do not, the fact that they immediately say 'look how greedy and evil the women are' is a big red light.
Posted by soozi (Member # 11108) on :
Whats an SW? Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
Social Worker!! Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Hi Advocate,
I am a child protection S/W so now you understand why i feel the need for so many holidays??? You probably understand more than most the stresses of this chosen career ad the need for escape to keep your sanity!!!!
"Yes that's true, but it's something MORE than that. IMO an Egyptian man that tries to use the 'Egyptian women are headaches' line is merely banking on the hope that the foreign woman has the egotism to actually think, 'oh yes and thank God I am so much better than those women who are so different from me, here let me ride in on my white horse and save you from those evil devil-women, thank GOD YOU FOUND ME!"
No i do not think that i am better than these women in fact i do not think i am better than anybody - just different. I have friends who are married to Egyptian women and they are not'greedy and evil' they just have different expectations. I have noticed though that they are often jealouse (insecure) and this can cause problem for their husbands.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:
quote:Originally posted by Almaz.:
quote:Originally posted by Tigerlily: Smuckers wrote:
"LAST WORD OF WARNING: if he disses Egyptian woman. Most serious and good men won't do this, others trying to convince you of why they don't want one will not. If he is dissin' Egyptian women in general remember is mother, sister(s), aunt(s) and grandmother(s) are Egyptian, why does he want you to think so badly of the women here if for anything other than his own gain?"
Because Egyptian women are headaches? I heard that too many times from guys!!
Then again it's sad that foreign women are many times too flirty!!!
I think everyone should go after the person he/she thinks would suit best in life/lifestyle. Unfortunately for many Egyptian men it's not an easy task to do due to traditional customs. Guys are still told by their families to marry a good Muslim woman and stay away from tha khawagas.
Of course Egyptian women are headaches. Many of us know their rights...and demand them lol Can you imagine the headache this gives to someone who tries to 'escape' from his responsibilities??
Yes that's true, but it's something MORE than that. IMO an Egyptian man that tries to use the 'Egyptian women are headaches' line is merely banking on the hope that the foreign woman has the egotism to actually think, 'oh yes and thank God I am so much better than those women who are so different from me, here let me ride in on my white horse and save you from those evil devil-women, thank GOD YOU FOUND ME!'
No. The truth is that in his culture the way they do things is the norm. It might be difficult and it might be making marriages difficult in a soceity that is as financially troubled as Egypt, but the men know very well that the majority of the time this is for the safety of the women. If this Egyptian man was honest and sincere he might say something like, 'look, times are tough in my country, marriages are difficult and expensive, I could save my money and wait a while to marry a good Egyptian girl if I wanted to, as there are good and bad in them the same as any woman'. But the fact that some do not, the fact that they immediately say 'look how greedy and evil the women are' is a big red light.
That's why I asked to try to find somebody out of his circuit to talk with. Within the circuit they cover each other. For me personally only by such contacts I was able to see persons and situations in the right perspectives. And believe me, my view comparised from the view I had 5 years ago, is totally different! But it isn't that long ago that I also thought knew it all so well...and the biggest mistake from me, was that I believed what had been told to me. A lot was the truth indeed, but the most important was not...
Posted by soozi (Member # 11108) on :
quote:Originally posted by advocate: Social Worker!!
Oh, cheers! Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
habeeby, I wasn't talking about you in particular, just generalizing the conversation. Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Hi Advocate, which area do you practice in ?
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
Of course some Egyptian women are jealous and insecure...exactly like some Egyptian men and other people in this world!!
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
CHILD PROTECTION..Senior Prac for my sins, but currently taking some time out to do some supervising foster carers, I miss the adrenalin of CP, so I guess I won't be here long. I am being persuaded to apply to be a GAL as I have done so much Court work. How long have you been qualified?
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
5 years, senior prac also. I am looking to leave the L.A. and go to Agency - this will give me as much leave as i want which means that i can have 10 holidays a year instead of 5 ha ha. I am off today- toil and now i am depressed to bits just spoken to my boyfriend who is on the beach in the sun whilst i am in the house, full of cold with the heating on!!!!! I hate this English weather tooooo much Posted by ShirleyValentinesFantasyLives (Member # 14207) on :
Re Tigerlily..........
Originally posted by ShirleyValentinesFantasyLives: I dont even allow her to sit in back of taxi so driver can see her in mirror.
If you both agreed on certain things incl. that she would not go shopping by herself etc. it's your business.
But may I ask about the situation in the taxi? Where is she supposed to sit then? Next to the cab driver or on the roof of the car (sorry lame joke I know)! Seriously I learned from the very beginning ONLY to sit in the back of the car.
Have a good day! ................................
You know I have read lots of your posts and like your serious approach to many things which are important. I hoped you would see I was trying to give help .
The answer to your question - of course she sits in the back! Am I likely to advise my wife I try to protect to sit next to a driver????????? I am not so good at describing the scenario obviously being Egyptian - but I mean she does not like to sit DIRECTLY behind the driver and I ask him to turn the mirror a little away. This is because I know some men turn the mirror to view a woman when he thinks she is distracted by the sights, and I have seen them do this and get into a fruity condition ! If you know what I mean. As a westerner, who happens to be muslim, has she not got the freedom to choose to be comfortable and dignified? I do not order her anything, but I respect her choices of comfort, and mainly agree with them
And the point about dancing with friends and family ........Definitely not an excuse. My family would move away from my wife if she tried to join in dancing with the men, and especially when you have a western wife you will find very few friends you can trust with anything!
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Alright, SVFL, maybe it was a misunderstanding as I am not an English native speaker either.
Have a great day! Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Smuckers, Egyptian men are more than financially troubled when it comes to marriage.
Most of them are not even financially stable at the age of 35 to be potencial candiates for Egyptian wanna-be-brides.
I posted throughout the year enough articles on how people try to make ends meet, how much unemployment is in this country, how low in general wages/salaries are, what everything cost and how prices increase etc....
Gosh I don't want to be in their shoes.
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
Hi habeeby, yes I hate the weather here too.
I am currently working as agency, pay much better and you have the flexible working hours/days. Also if you get fed up at the placement you can leave without giving the notice a senior prac has to of 3 months!
I have been qualified for 6 years, was asked to apply as TM but dont need the responibility of juggling figures!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I agree with you TL.
Posted by the_fairy_tales (Member # 14445) on :
hey all, I am jst in today and curiousely went through these messages... and I am really sorry to say to Habeeby that 'he jst wanna the visa'. I am an Egyptian lady and I am commited to a French man.. and I know quite well such cultural, economic and sexual problems that could lead to such relationship. In all cases, whether you are in denial or you are confident he's the right man for you, you will pursue it to give yourself the luxury of trying and I totally agree with this. Go for it dear, you need to try it and to give yourself the benefit of doubt and I really hope that our views would be wrong. Wish you all the happiness dear Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Quote:
when you have a western wife you will find very few friends you can trust with anything!
I am offended by this!
Are you insinuating that all western women are easy???? If you trust your wife then there should be no problem, if she loves you she will always be loyal and never look to another for she will only have eyes for one man, every other man will be invisible to her. Or is this a cultural belief relating to the myth that uncircumcised women can't control themselves cos they are crazy for the 'jiggy jiggy' Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Looks like this man had bad experience with this before.
BUT a friend who hits on your wife is not a friend after all.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Posted by Evil spelled backward is live (Member # 14028) on :
and would u call the wife if she went with it?
well i have weird opinion friends are friends out side i don't like hosting any one inside my house or entering any others houses even if its my deepest friend there is nothing we need to do inside the house we cant do out side
house privacy must be respected i dont like been inside house seen some thing i shouldn't see or surprises mistakes happens same on my side if the house have a lady inside i don't even hit the door bill after 8 pm freaky eah?
amr
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I'm totally confused, what are we talking about?? Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Habeeby
I think nobody here wants to take away your happiness from you. But pleassse, BE CAREFUL! Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
It appears to me that there are seriouse trust issues here or lack of!!! If the wife went with it of course i would call her i have very strong opinions in relation to loyalty and respect. The married woman that recipricates any amorouse behaviour from any man other than her husband is either a dirty woman, there are problems in her marriage or she does not truly love her husband and she definatelly does not respect herself. Any man that tries to hit on the wife of a friend does not deserve to have friends and i would expect my husband to ostracise him for his lack of respect to me. I do not understand why there are so many hang ups in Egypt about men and women being alone together is everybody in Egypt sex obsessed ? Are people that frustrated that they cannot trust themselves to be alone with a member of the opposite sex because they will totally lose contro of all their senses and make 'jiggy jiggy'. Sex is a fantastic and wonderful thing between two loving people who wish to share intimacy, sex between two people who are just looking to their own pleasure is a selfish and empty act that can cause heartache and spread disease Also, why not hit the doorbell after 8pm is this the mahic hour when women and men become overtaken by lust? I must remember to boly my dor at 8pm in case i find mysef throwing my clothes off and ravaging the first person to 'ring my bell' ha ha ha pun intended Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
By the way, I've always preferred men who are honest rather than sweet, but it's just me... With (most) Egyptian men I always feel like a box of chocolates. I don't mind but I just don't take it seriously (anymore) Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Makbeta thanks but i was born careful. Yes i agree i find it difficult to take it seriouse and still struggle with it now but i just accept that it is his way of sharing his feelings, he probaby thinks that i am the most unromantic woman he has ever met and suspiciouse - he buys me flowers, i say what have you done? But there must be worse things that a man can be that too sweet ?
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: Quote:
when you have a western wife you will find very few friends you can trust with anything!
I am offended by this!
Are you insinuating that all western women are easy???? If you trust your wife then there should be no problem, if she loves you she will always be loyal and never look to another for she will only have eyes for one man, every other man will be invisible to her. Or is this a cultural belief relating to the myth that uncircumcised women can't control themselves cos they are crazy for the 'jiggy jiggy'
You misunderstood.
People here are untrustworthy and will try to mess up your relationship out of jealousy & envy, they'll do crap like flirt with your man or try to spread nasty rumors, etc.
Posted by soozi (Member # 11108) on :
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: Quote:
when you have a western wife you will find very few friends you can trust with anything!
I am offended by this!
Are you insinuating that all western women are easy???? If you trust your wife then there should be no problem, if she loves you she will always be loyal and never look to another for she will only have eyes for one man, every other man will be invisible to her. Or is this a cultural belief relating to the myth that uncircumcised women can't control themselves cos they are crazy for the 'jiggy jiggy'
Habeeby, I think you've misunderstood SVFL's post.
I read it as not that he didn't trust his wife, but he didn't trust his friends. And that could be down to something as simple as the thoughts that they may have about his wife (and not act upon), but the culture in Egypt is different. You are used to men being flattered if other men look at their woman. It is totally different in Egypt, it is offensive to an Egyptian man, if his partner is being looked at by other men - even their friends.
Posted by Evil spelled backward is live (Member # 14028) on :
quote:Originally posted by Makbeta: By the way, I've always preferred men who are honest rather than sweet, but it's just me... With (most)Egyptian men I always feel like a box of chocolates. I don't mind but I just don't take it seriously (anymore)
are u a box of chocolates ? can your provide evidence like naked pics etc? what type of chocolates your answer will change alot of people life
thanks in advance cheers amr
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by Evil spelled backward is live:
quote:Originally posted by Makbeta: By the way, I've always preferred men who are honest rather than sweet, but it's just me... With (most)Egyptian men I always feel like a box of chocolates. I don't mind but I just don't take it seriously (anymore)
are u a box of chocolates ? can your provide evidence like naked pics etc? what type of chocolates your answer will change alot of people life
thanks in advance cheers amr
Amr you make me blush...... Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
And this a typical example of not understanding the culture! The meaning of being an "easy woman" to egyptians is totally different as it is in our point of view. Men and women indeed behave in a different way as they do in our culture, and YES a sincere man wouldn't even feel comfortable being alone with the wife of a friend and I won't tell you how about not sincere men... A decent woman should avoid this at all times, even as a decent man would. You can make jokes of it, and hold on to your own opinion, but in that case I'm afraid you have to be prepared on some not-so-nice expierences! This is Egypt, habeeby, and it's different here...
Posted by Evil spelled backward is live (Member # 14028) on :
that will help cutting some of the expenses of makeup products at least in the cheeks cheers amr
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by Evil spelled backward is live: that will help cutting some of the expenses of makeup products at least in the cheeks cheers amr
Oh , I see Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
quote:Originally posted by soozi: Habeeby, I think you've misunderstood SVFL's post.
I read it as not that he didn't trust his wife, but he didn't trust his friends. And that could be down to something as simple as the thoughts that they may have about his wife (and not act upon), but the culture in Egypt is different. You are used to men being flattered if other men look at their woman. It is totally different in Egypt, it is offensive to an Egyptian man, if his partner is being looked at by other men - even their friends.
Yes, there's also a big difference between being glanced at & being eyeball-raped.
Posted by soozi (Member # 11108) on :
Ooh, eyeball-raped, now there's a term that speaks volumes!
I've never heard that one before, but it means sooooo much! Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
So if men cannot look at the wives of their friends how are they supposed to commnicate without making eye contact? - the eyes are the door to the soul and show a variety of emotions. I am aware of this as when i visit my boyfriends famiy his Father hakes my hand but does not look to my face and my boyfriend explained that he will not look to another woman's face than his wife but i strugge with this one. I have an discussed this and other things with my boyfriend and we have agreed as to what behaviour he finds acceptable and unacceptable and visa versa, therefore we have reched a compromise. I will conform to some of his requests but he must also accept that i am a western woman and because i will choose to marry an Egyptian man i will not change into a different person, he chose me this way!!!
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Eyeball- raped hee hee hee i like that term, never heard it before but it just makes me want to laugh. I don't know why, it tickles me! maybe ana magnoona Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Well, habeeby, you don't have to look very long or deep in the eyes of an Egyptian man and he might judge this as interest in him.
And don't look at an Egyptian man twice shortly afterwards; he'll smile, come over and you have lots of explaining to do!!! Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
God help my fiancee when he comes to England if he thinks like that he will think every woman he meets is interested in him! I must tell you that when i visited the pyramids with my fiancee and my daughter, who is 13 with long blonde hair , bright blue eyes and very beautiful we had a trail of young egyptian boys following us for the day. I made sure she covered up before we went because i am aware of the impact that shorts and t-shirt can have but we still attracted the attention of every young male in the vicinity. My fiancee had to go and have a word with them in the end explaining that i was his wife and she is his daughter but they still followed just at a distance this time. She was amused by the whole thing - naughty girl that was without looking twice!!!!
Posted by ShirleyValentinesFantasyLives (Member # 14207) on :
Quote:
when you have a western wife you will find very few friends you can trust with anything!
I am offended by this! [Mad]
Are you insinuating that all western women are easy???? If you trust your wife then there should be no problem, if she loves you she will always be loyal and never look to another for she will only have eyes for one man, every other man will be invisible to her. Or is this a cultural belief relating to the myth that uncircumcised women can't control themselves cos they are crazy for the 'jiggy jiggy' [Roll Eyes]
Thank you VBS, Soozi, ????? and all who actually understood what I was saying !
Of course Im not saying I dont trust my wife! I would not be married to her for so long and be so happy if I did not. and I am offended you could imagine after what I have written that I would be the sort of man who would be happy to have a wife I could not trust or who embarrass me. For me she is a true example of respectfulness and morals. she turns her eyes from men. never dances in front of anyone. never drink alcohol. never sit alone with any man and above all loves Allah and his commands. In return I do not go alone with any female. I go everywhere with my wife. if she is not by my side I dont want to go. this is my feeling to always help her and be with her - except for work of course ! I do not dance with any females, and I turn my eyes from females. especially the ones who are trying to make men notice them.I do not drink alcohol You cant ignore the fact our culture says what a man and womans reputation is by their actions and some actions seem strange to foreign people. I am a man. I get to hear the things some of the bad people say. I know what goes on and what the signs to look for are. When I said if you have foreign wife you find there are not many friends you can trust it is true. Suddenly you have friends you did not even see before. They want to join you for food and drink - at your cost. they will ask stupid things like for advices on how they can be "lucky" like you. They will try to embarrass a man by staring at his wife to let him know they think she is not to be treated as an Egyptian wife. Lots of these things come from some bad people. I was fed up with all the people who see me with foreign wife and think she is just used. I said my wife was muslim. We did things islamic way and know each other for 6 years before marriage. No urfi. she dresses as muslimah expected to dress and behaved well. but still in the begining some stupid ones would say how can she be muslim she is foreign !As ????? says - its a different culture for Egyptians, something some choose to ignore and it will have bed result. We grow up with culture mixed with religion so it is hard to change ways and sometimes some things cannot be changed because they are important in religion. the boys who followed your daughter. they know from her she is not looking like the relative of an Egyptian. they read signs and know their own culture. so they think you are a tourist who has Egyptian guide. to them this means you must have money and it is all fun for them to have the chance to follow and stare at a young girl so
Like i said there are good men to make good husbands but there many more bad ones to make bad husbands. I was trying to help to give you ideas of our ways of looking at things. not for any bad reason.I not made much of good job it seems! sorry.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Dunes could learn a couple of things from you....
Love the quote:
"Like i said there are good men to make good husbands but there many more bad ones to make bad husbands."
Posted by egypt 2007 (Member # 14398) on :
Anyone would think that all egyptian men are a no go area,,, please let us give them a chance and after all we are on this site reading the negative and positive so im sure we will take it all into account but will enjoy our lifes with the men we met and go from there. If we make a mistake we will be bakc here in time to come telling others.
Buy good luck habeeby........ i wish you well, i do hope my relationship works too.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by egypt 2007: Anyone would think that all egyptian men are a no go area,,, please let us give them a chance and after all we are on this site reading the negative and positive so im sure we will take it all into account but will enjoy our lifes with the men we met and go from there. If we make a mistake we will be bakc here in time to come telling others.
Buy good luck habeeby........ i wish you well, i do hope my relationship works too.
I don't think anybody can be that stupid to think that 40.000 million males are the same. I DO believe that a warned woman will keep it in the backside of her head, just for in case as...
Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
quote:Originally posted by ?????:
I don't think anybody can be that stupid to think that 40.000 million males are the same. I DO believe that a warned woman will keep it in the backside of her head, just for in case as... [/QUOTE]
????? LOL I would never normally correct the English of a non native English speaker but this one made me laugh. It needs to be 'will keep it in the back of her head'
backside in English is used to refer to one's posterior LOL but maybe also thats a good place for her to keep the warning Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
^^^^^^ True, but ????? it was cute and made me smile. Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
SFVL i apologise immensly for my misunderstanding of what you were trying to say. Your last message is a little clearer. I appreciate what you were saying about your wife and her being muslim and that is good for both you and her that you have the same beliefs and she is happy to live by the expected behaviour of a muslim woman. What i am trying to say is i am not a muslim woman and i will respect my husband in that i will not dress provocatively to attract the attention of other men, i do not drink acohol other than a very occasional bottle of beer and only the one but he tends to do the same, i am a loyal and faithful woman but that is not only out of respect to him that is out of respect to myself. But he must also respect that if he chooses to be with a christian woman he must accept some behaviours that are my way of having fun but harmless such as dancing with other men. However, when i say dancing i do not mean dancing close or even touching them just dancing. If he cannot accept this then i would suggest to him he finds himself a muslim woman. We have discussed this and i have told him if i believed in the teachings of the Quran i would convert but i would never convert to please him as that would be blasphemouse in my eyes. Needless to say i have not explored this so it is not even a consideration at the moment and i do not know whether it will be in the future.
Posted by bettyN (Member # 14096) on :
Tigerlily wasn't forced to go to a hotel but between the hard bed and the cockroaches didn't quite suit me. Nasr city is boring and dirty. I I like being closer to downtown cairo. My favorite hotel is the marriott. Very pretty, excellent restaurants and very comfortable. I am just spoiled with my lifesyle here in the U.S. is all. Egypt doesn't float my boat at all! I live in California, 10 minutes from the beach one hour north of santa barbara. They call it god's country here. It's the best!
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by bettyN: Tigerlily wasn't forced to go to a hotel but between the hard bed and the cockroaches didn't quite suit me.
Oh alright, so the apartment had flaws. And of course I know the Marriott very well. I used to be many times there for lunch and at Harry's Pub!!
And I fully understand your view. Cairo is not for everyone. You either love it or you hate it. But did you ever take a trip up to the beaches in Northern Egypt or Sinai? I am sure you would almost feel like back home. Take care! Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: SFVL i apologise immensly for my misunderstanding of what you were trying to say. Your last message is a little clearer. I appreciate what you were saying about your wife and her being muslim and that is good for both you and her that you have the same beliefs and she is happy to live by the expected behaviour of a muslim woman. What i am trying to say is i am not a muslim woman and i will respect my husband in that i will not dress provocatively to attract the attention of other men, i do not drink acohol other than a very occasional bottle of beer and only the one but he tends to do the same, i am a loyal and faithful woman but that is not only out of respect to him that is out of respect to myself. But he must also respect that if he chooses to be with a christian woman he must accept some behaviours that are my way of having fun but harmless such as dancing with other men. However, when i say dancing i do not mean dancing close or even touching them just dancing. If he cannot accept this then i would suggest to him he finds himself a muslim woman. We have discussed this and i have told him if i believed in the teachings of the Quran i would convert but i would never convert to please him as that would be blasphemouse in my eyes. Needless to say i have not explored this so it is not even a consideration at the moment and i do not know whether it will be in the future.
Habeeby you just don't get it, its not about your partner finding another a woman if he can't accept you dancing with other men. It is the other way round, if you want to dance with men then dont marry a muslim man. There are many areas that you will need to both find compromise in a cross cultural relationship but this is not one of them, if you can't understand how he feels to see you dancing with another man then you don't understand your man at all. If you want the love, respect and caring of an Egyptian man then start learning fast about the things that really matter to him. If you really love and understand him you could not do this to him. Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
ya know i have noticed they dont want u to do the same with their own family members ya can talk to his brother but nothin more y is that all women know family members are offlimitis well if she has the basic knolege of love and respect!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
^^^ He has the occasional beer - we're talking about a different type of Egyptian Muslim man altogether. Definitely not the type you want to get involved with IMO.
Posted by Anthropos (Member # 9410) on :
Occasional beer means he is a bad man?
Posted by egybrit (Member # 14388) on :
learning what matters is difficult if you dont know the egyptian ways.....i learnt to cover up....tried not to be seen and not heard...OBEY. i was told once this is not the way and was expected to remember for all times....seems i did everything wrong all the time..yep for me it was hard to understand........but perhaps i had the wrong teacher.....or perhaps he just wanted control..........which he may not have got with an egyptian woman.......who knows.......i was down all the time to see him help etc but also wanted to go out.......we never went out as a couple always with men friends of his......think i was a liability...together 24hrs......and if he had to go somewhere he left me with a MAN friend of his alone either in the flat or coffee shop until he had finished....he always told me he could trust this man.any ideas
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
i thank god walid does not drink and he is very smart he takes care of his mom and brother very well so i know he would be a great provider so what if he is poor compaired to our usa standards he tries he doesnt give up
Posted by Anthropos (Member # 9410) on :
exactly tina kamal - I don't understand how women can reject men on the basis of their income.
If they are young and eager and have potential anything can happen. And it is character building not have been born with a silver spoon in your mouth...
Posted by ShirleyValentinesFantasyLives (Member # 14207) on :
Yes Smuckers - one beer is one too many, so i dont think advices i give mean the same. the other things may not be able to be seen the same way. i do not think i am very strict myself, but i do follow these simple commands.like Penny said some things are not a choice for us - they just mean too much to break and choosing a muslim husband does not mean he will change for you Posted by soozi (Member # 11108) on :
Having a drink doesn't make anyone bad. Ok so Islam says its bad. I'm a Catholic, but do the occasional thing that I shouldn't - I still like to think of myself as generally a good person!
Posted by Anthropos (Member # 9410) on :
I don't understand how people can justify themselves by saying that they don't drink alcohol and then they committ many moral sins - like backbiting, and slandering other people...oh but it is all ok, they will get into paradise because they didn't drink alcohol or eat pork.
How can that be more important?
Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
quote:Originally posted by soozi: Having a drink doesn't make anyone bad. Ok so Islam says its bad. I'm a Catholic, but do the occasional thing that I shouldn't - I still like to think of myself as generally a good person!
Soozi its not like that of course you are not bad because you drink alcohol in moderation. Its just for a Muslim they are following a code of conduct laid down in the Koran, and that prohibits alcohol for them. A Muslim's relationship with god is an integral part of their life and alcohol would interfer with that. It's not right for them but they are not saying it's not right for you. As a non Muslim maybe it's not right for me to explain but that's the way I understand it.
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
it is bad when a man drinks everydang day yes the tend to get drunk and act a fool i would rather have a poor man then a drinkin man anyday i could survive better knowin im loved then not know if hes rich and treatin other women the same no never i have been with alcoholic mexicans most of my life and i do not drink yuck so y should i put myself in that situation the men who drink are more opt to abuse women or even kill them when they hit u and dont rember its the worst oooooooooooo im sorry i wont do it again what the f ever the next day same dang thing sorry dont cut it when im black and blue i will never let a man do that again
Posted by Anthropos (Member # 9410) on :
I agree with you Tina
Poor man everyday than a drinking beating alcoholic who spends all his money on the booze.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Anthropos: I don't understand how people can justify themselves by saying that they don't drink alcohol and then they committ many moral sins - like backbiting, and slandering other people...oh but it is all ok, they will get into paradise because they didn't drink alcohol or eat pork.
How can that be more important?
You're not looking at it the right way, it's a cultural thing. Of course all people of all religous backgrounds do things that perhaps their religious beliefs tell them they shouldn't, but culturally for a muslim man in Egypt to drink alcohol isn't a good sign. IT's that simple and I wouldn't have known that until I have lived here a while. It's that simple. People need to start viewing these men from the viewpoint of the MANS culture and not from her own.
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
i would love to live in a place where the women and men dont make drinkin the number 1 prority in their lives everyone i know are drinkers when they get drunk i feel left out but i still will not drink to be apart of the crowd thats just not me therefor i would rather disaccoiate myself from that and be online with walid lol
Posted by Anthropos (Member # 9410) on :
If some Egyptian man drank occasionally then I wouldn't necessarily think it a bad sign. I would even perhaps take it as a sign of being open minded and not being totally dictated by cultural norms and "gosh what will people think?"
It could be a strong sign of character
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
^^ Ok, well good luck with that. I'm talking about the man who claims to be a practicing believing Muslim man. There are many born Muslims who don't necessarily practice Islam the same as any other religion. I am insistient that a Muslim man in EGYPT who claims to practice his faith and believe in the words of the Qur'an who even takes the OCCASIONAL drink is shifty shady and will eventually cause someone heart ache...sorry JUST MY OPINION. Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: ^^ Ok, well good luck with that. I'm talking about the man who claims to be a practicing believing Muslim man. There are many born Muslims who don't necessarily practice Islam the same as any other religion. I am insistient that a Muslim man in EGYPT who claims to practice his faith and believe in the words of the Qur'an who even takes the OCCASIONAL drink is shifty shady and will eventually cause someone heart ache...sorry JUST MY OPINION.
with that yes smuckers i do agree with u
Posted by Anthropos (Member # 9410) on :
Of course it would look very strange if a man who proclaims to be correct in his muslim ways would then drink - but the fact remains that nobody is correct in his ways, and what I am saying is that taking occasional drink is much less of a sin than many other sins that people committ, muslim or not, and yet they go unnoticed or untalked aobut, but everybody is fixated on a drink???
Posted by soozi (Member # 11108) on :
quote:Originally posted by Penny:
quote:Originally posted by soozi: Having a drink doesn't make anyone bad. Ok so Islam says its bad. I'm a Catholic, but do the occasional thing that I shouldn't - I still like to think of myself as generally a good person!
Soozi its not like that of course you are not bad because you drink alcohol in moderation. Its just for a Muslim they are following a code of conduct laid down in the Koran, and that prohibits alcohol for them. A Muslim's relationship with god is an integral part of their life and alcohol would interfer with that. It's not right for them but they are not saying it's not right for you. As a non Muslim maybe it's not right for me to explain but that's the way I understand it.
I do understand what you say here, but if a Muslim man (or woman) decided that one day they were going to have a bottle of beer, that doesn't make them bad. It could make them not the best Muslim on the planet, but not a bad person. Having said that, Smuckers comment did make me view my opinion from a different perspective, how from a cultural view, it could be a bad sign about the character of the person.
Interesting isn't it, how a slightly different view of something, makes it look totally different! Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Soozi that's exactly right. It isn't the idea that messing up in religion makes you a BAD person, we're all human. But in Egypt it's beyond religion, it's a cultural norm that is broken and while I don't think everyone is perfect, the Muslim man in Egypt who comes from a good family and lives by the cultural standards he is used to wouldn't breech this idea of alcohol even OOPS by accident 'every now and then'.
Posted by Anthropos (Member # 9410) on :
It is not necessarily a bad sign of the character. People are not robots, they don't follow their culture like it was a program installed in them. Culture is being constantly reproduced and renegotiated.
personally I don't drink alcohol, but I come from a country where it is considered normal to drink.
According to this cultural logics, me not drinking would be a bad sign of my character because it didn't coincied with the culture of the majority of my country?
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Depends which country you are from Anthropos.
Posted by Anthropos (Member # 9410) on :
People coming from "traditional" countries are not more controlled by culture than people from any other countries.
Posted by soozi (Member # 11108) on :
Sometimes though, logic doesn't apply (no offense meant to anyone), and you just have to accept that things are the way they are!
Or maybe logic does apply, just not the logic you or I are used to?!
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: ^^ Ok, well good luck with that. I'm talking about the man who claims to be a practicing believing Muslim man. There are many born Muslims who don't necessarily practice Islam the same as any other religion. I am insistient that a Muslim man in EGYPT who claims to practice his faith and believe in the words of the Qur'an who even takes the OCCASIONAL drink is shifty shady and will eventually cause someone heart ache...sorry JUST MY OPINION.
Shifty Shady- I like this alot smucks. This is my new phrase of the week! Posted by ShirleyValentinesFantasyLives (Member # 14207) on :
Anthropos please I did not mean anyone is bad who is drinking and i hoped no one would think i was trying to make myself better than anyone. if people drink it is up to them.but alcohol is bad and can make us do stupid things. drinking is not for me.that is my choice but i dont mean i try to show i am better than anyone. what i mean is if a man thinks it is ok to drink, (they usually will never drink in ramadan which means there is a limit to what they will do) then that man is so strict about other things too. so any advices to Habeeby about dancing etc. may be no good to her because her man is not so culturally strict as some people and dancing, wearing bikini etc is not bad in his eyes. a man drinking a beer does not make him bad husband.
i never wish to insult anyone or back bite them as you think. this is not good to do. im sure i have done things wrong as all human people do. i am not strict either. i smoke! i wear funky european clothes & have great friends from all cultures and religions. i listen to music, i dont ban people who have been drinking from my house and we have 2 dogs and a cat inside - thats not strict!
i dont choose who goes to paradise and i dont think i have any better chance than anyone else, muslim christian or jew. we are all at Gods mercy for that one. the bible says man cannot be saved by his deeds alone. Habeeby sounds very happy and i hope she will continue to be happy and i hope nothing except her mans behaviour would make her choose the way to go. he deserves a chance to prove himself the same as anyone does. this man may be just everything she hopes him to be
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by Anthropos: Poor man everyday than a drinking beating alcoholic who spends all his money on the booze.
Why such a drastic scenario?
Look f.e. to countries like Italy and France where a good glass of wine actually belongs to at least one meal a day. And it doesn't mean these people turn into alcoholics.
Now if Muslims drink alcohol it's up to them how sincere they are following the rules of the Koran. I know couple of Muslims which drink alcohol and they are wonderful people. If it doesn't bother them to drink alcohol why should it bother me? Live and let live.
Cheers!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: ^^ Ok, well good luck with that. I'm talking about the man who claims to be a practicing believing Muslim man. There are many born Muslims who don't necessarily practice Islam the same as any other religion. I am insistient that a Muslim man in EGYPT who claims to practice his faith and believe in the words of the Qur'an who even takes the OCCASIONAL drink is shifty shady and will eventually cause someone heart ache...sorry JUST MY OPINION.
Shifty Shady- I like this alot smucks. This is my new phrase of the week!
THIEF! Posted by bettyN (Member # 14096) on :
you are absolutely right tigerlily. I am 1/2 italian, my grandfather used to make wine. every sunday after church he would take us down to the wine cellar and poor 1 glass and let us kids share it. It's their culture, but he wasn''t a alcoholic. We wondered later on if he ever washed that glass! As for Egypt I have never been anywhere but Banha and Cairo. I am so tired from traveling I don't want to travel anywhere else when I am their. I come from California so it's such a long flight to Egypt. I need to experience some of the other areas definately. I get so nervous with the driving in cairo. It amazes me their is no road rage.
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Oh mu god you lot i said 1 occasional bottle of beer and you make this man out to be an alcholic!!!! I have never seen him drunk ad if i did i would not be with him as i am not very keen on alcohol myself. As for a practicing muslim all i cn tell you is when it is Ramadam he prays, stops smoking and fasts. At other times he does not pray and is a smoker. I do not have any problem with the occasional bottle of beer and i mean very occasional my preference is not to be with a man who has beer breath and talks crap because he is intoxicated. He does live his life by some of the rules of the Qur'an and not ny others but surely this is individual choice not sin. I don't think it is anybody's place to judge someone it is only God who can judge and i don't think Mohammad will cast him out for drinking a bottle of beer and smoking. He is a good man who is kind and respectful to others isn't that what is important. You say that my dancing with other men makes him angry but i have discussed this with him and obviously if i was gyrating with complete strangers in a bar he would be very angry but then rightfully so. i only ever dance with the people that i know he trusts and who have an open minded way of thinking like him so that they do not misunderstand me. I do not gyrate or make physical contact with these men. Anyway how hypocritical some muslims can be have you seen some of these professional belly dancers in England we would call them pole dancers. They were the skimpiest of clothes and dance so suggestively isn't that a cultural thing????
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
oh my god i am so angry that my last message was full of grammatical errors You have called this man shifty, shady and a thief because he drinks a beer, how narrow minded and judgmental. This is not a dictatorship, do you thin if people do not conform to your expectations it is ok to dis them? I would not like to be on a desert isand with you lot, lord of the flies springs to mind. Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Oh my oh my..... Habeeby, your last post looks like a battlefield!
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
'battlefield' i am on the verge of full scale war!!!!! I do not mind the opinions in respect of certain behaviours but to refer to someone as shifty, shady and a thief - very strong words that are totally uncalled for Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Take it easy or else you'll make yourself sick Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
You are right Makbeta - i will count to 10 ! no i will count to 100 ! No 1000! No i will just rise above the narrow mindedness like the better person that i am Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Honey, I don't think anybody here is narrow-minded - just the opposite. And everybody on ES has an inalienable right to express their opinion. Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
assal opinion is fine i do not have any probem with that in fact i find it interesting to hear other people's opinions but to call somebody a 'shifty, shady and a thief'!!! If we are going to discuss the understanding of other people's cultures well in my culture that is very offensive Yes it maybe fair to say that he is not a very good muslim and he does not pretend to be anything other that what he is - but he was born a muslim he did not choose this so if he makes the choice to walk with one foot on the path and one foot in the wilderness surely that does not make him shifty, shady and a thief Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Habeeby please don't take everything so serious what's written here..... ES is a wacky forum you'll see!!! Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Sorry Tigerlily - i was just so insulted ! But do i get 10 out of 10 for defending my habeeby to the death ha ha Posted by Black Dahlia (Member # 12864) on :
Whats the 10 out of 10 for? defending your so sure you are not one of the suckers? (For that its certainly a 10 from 10 score). you defend him well. or for defending someone you hope to get to know properly one day? habeebi = anyone whose close to you, male or female - habibti = more close like darling/sweetheart.
so, the all the advice did not matter anyway? you already know he's maferig, emir aswad?
I bet so many people wish they had such certainty of knowing someone. I reckon Egyptian men know what conduct is expected of Egyptian men. To find one willing to give some true insight is rare.
Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: Sorry Tigerlily - i was just so insulted ! But do i get 10 out of 10 for defending my habeeby to the death ha ha
Try reading the posts, nobody called him a thief, as for 'shifty shady' have you asked him yet if he is allowed to marry an Agnostic woman or does he stretch his Muslim principals on this one as well his consumption of Alcohol? Its a bit more of a serious issue though?
Posted by foreignluvr (Member # 5854) on :
quote:Originally posted by Penny:
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: Sorry Tigerlily - i was just so insulted ! But do i get 10 out of 10 for defending my habeeby to the death ha ha
Try reading the posts, nobody called him a thief, as for 'shifty shady' have you asked him yet if he is allowed to marry an Agnostic woman or does he stretch his Muslim principals on this one as well his consumption of Alcohol? Its a bit more of a serious issue though?
Very good point Penny on the marrying of an Agnostic woman.
Habeeby, Although I have been a member here for a number of years I don't post all that much as I am really busy and I don't have a lot of time to. Also, I am not one to judge anyone else as I feel that is not my place and only God's/Allah's place. You know your b/f, we don't, and as long as you stay objective you will know if there is a chance for this relationship to progress to a loving marriage.
I do feel though, that this is a very good question for you to discuss with your b/f. Even those Muslims that don't always follow their religion most always will only marry another muslim or Christian woman. Even though it is none of my business I for one am very curious as to how he would answer this question... Good luck..
Posted by sawny (Member # 11224) on :
Habibi, I have been married to an Egyptian for two years, never would I drink in public, dance with another man, even family or friends,nor sunbathe in public. Visas are very difficult to come by. Good luck
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
I am was christened a Christian, as i have gained more knowledge in respect of religion i have become an agnostic which as you are aware is not a non believer but a non practicing christian. Therefore all this means is that i do not go to church to worship god. I believe that he see's all that i do everyday and if i wish to speak to my God he will listen to me wherever i am so i do not go to church. I lead a good clean life and treat all people as i would wish them to treat me. Yes1 i have shared this with him and he does not have a problem with this.
Back Dahlia can you please translate maferig, emir aswad, i am an ignorant english woman Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
Originally posted by Habeeby
quote: I am was christened a Christian, as i have gained more knowledge in respect of religion i have become an agnostic which as you are aware is not a non believer but a non practicing christian. Therefore all this means is that i do not go to church to worship god. I believe that he see's all that i do everyday and if i wish to speak to my God he will listen to me wherever i am so i do not go to church. I lead a good clean life and treat all people as i would wish them to treat me. Yes1 i have shared this with him and he does not have a problem with this.
The definition of Agnostic, as I understand it, is someone that does not 'know' or 'believe' that God exists.
There are different categories of Agnostics, those who don't 'think' God exists and don't care, those that have doubts but are ready to learn more, those that refuse to even discuss God at all etc..
In Islam, those who do not believe in God, are called the unbelievers, and Muslims are not supposed to marry unbelievers.
Thus, the fuss over how come a Muslim man has no problem with this.
Psychologically speaking, Muslims who pray occasionally, and maybe fast in Ramadan, apparently feel less guilty that way, for not practicing their religion on a daily basis.
On the other hand, those who only pray when they feel desperate, are a 'third' kind.. they only think of God when they are let down by everyone, or in need with no help from anyone, then they reach out to God.
But in your case habeeby, you seem to be a believer in God, but don't practice religion. Correct me anyone if I'm wrong, but I do not think that describes an Agnostic person. I think it describes an Atheist.
EDITED and ADDED the following:
On the other - other - hand here is something to confuse us more lol
Agnostic atheism From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Jump to: navigation, search
Agnostic atheism is a philosophical doctrine that encompasses both atheism and agnosticism. Atheism is generally defined as "do not believe in a theism" while agnosticism is usually defined as "an absence of knowledge (or any claim of knowledge)". An agnostic may identify as an atheist or a theist in certain circumstances (see Agnostic theism).
One of the earliest explanations of agnostic atheism is that of Robert Flint, in his Croall Lecture of 1887-1888 (published in 1903 under the title Agnosticism):
"The atheist may however be, and not unfrequently is, an agnostic. There is an agnostic atheism or atheistic agnosticism, and the combination of atheism with agnosticism which may be so named is not an uncommon one."[1]
"If a man has failed to find any good reason for believing that there is a God, it is perfectly natural and rational that he should not believe that there is a God; and if so, he is an atheist... if he goes farther, and, after an investigation into the nature and reach of human knowledge, ending in the conclusion that the existence of God is incapable of proof, cease to believe in it on the ground that he cannot know it to be true, he is an agnostic and also an atheist - an agnostic-atheist - an atheist because an agnostic... while, then, it is erroneous to identify agnosticism and atheism, it is equally erroneous so to separate them as if the one were exclusive of the other..."[2]
Individuals may identify as agnostic atheists based on their knowledge of the philosophical concepts of epistemology, theory of justification and Occam's razor.
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
And for the interested here is what I found about Egyptians and Agnosticism/Atheism, same source as above.
Atheism and agnosticism
There are Egyptians who identify as atheist and agnostic, but their numbers are unknown as openly advocating such positions risks legal sanction on the basis of apostasy (this occurs only if a citizen takes the step of suing the person engaging in apostacy, not automatically by the general prosecutor). In 2000, an openly atheist Egyptian writer, who called for the establishment of a local association for atheists, was tried on charges of insulting Islam in four of his books.
[I realize that I just hijacked the 'Egyptian Love' thread! OOPS!!My justification is: got intrigued by the term Agnostic in habeeby's posts. Hoping to be forgiven ]
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Almaz you have totally confused me now - i don't know what i am anymore????? To clarify you can call me what you like but i am a non-practicing beiever but who i believe is in another matter - call them God, Allah, Jehovah, Mohammad but what i believe in is a higher being who see's all that we do and judges us when we pass over to the other side. Therefore i live my life by certain principles and hope that when i am called my life will have been a good one and i will not be punished. However, it is not just about being judged it is about living my life with vlues and principles that i feel comfortable with. Posted by Black Dahlia (Member # 12864) on :
"Black Dahlia can you please translate maferig, emir aswad, i am an ignorant english woman "
emir aswad - like black prince maferig - a mans name from an old funny movie, where the man has not got much money and his friends suddenly see it comes from nowhere
Posted by Black Dahlia (Member # 12864) on :
this is not saying he is Maferig, but thats most likely how his "friends" see him. they will all want to know him, know what his secret is to being able to bag an english woman, and share in his "success" Most of us foreign wives will have some experience of these "friends". the ones who "like" us so much regardless of us being culturally different. and why? because the man is suddenly seen as a cash machine for the unfortunate souls who so far have not been so lucky, and he is supposed to share some of his good fortune with those who still wait. Some people have this way as a career. I think what everyone tried to say is simply be careful, take your time, and hope luck is on your side. especially as you have not actually lived there and experienced how things really go.
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: Almaz you have totally confused me now - i don't know what i am anymore????? To clarify you can call me what you like but i am a non-practicing beiever but who i believe is in another matter - call them God, Allah, Jehovah, Mohammad but what i believe in is a higher being who see's all that we do and judges us when we pass over to the other side. Therefore i live my life by certain principles and hope that when i am called my life will have been a good one and i will not be punished. However, it is not just about being judged it is about living my life with vlues and principles that i feel comfortable with.
it was confusing lol I got intrigued by the difference between agnostic and atheist...
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Dahlia: maferig - a mans name from an old funny movie, where the man has not got much money and his friends suddenly see it comes from nowhere
Which movie ?
Posted by Condom Machine 4 Refund insert baby (Member # 14028) on :
Lion King Part 3 the return
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
^^^ hardy har har, yes I'm sure maferig was in Lion King. Maferig (aka simba) comes back with bling.
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Black Dahlia i disagree with this because when i travel to Egypt i pay for my flight and i do not take cash because i have my debit card in case of emergencies. He pays for my accommodation, food, drink, everything by his insistence. When his friends join us sometimes they pay sometimes he pays. I do not spend a penny when i am in Egypt other than when i return home i buy gifts at the duty free shop in the airport to take back Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
^^ investment?
Posted by habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Well i thank God he is a physiotherapist and not an accountatn because he has made a poor investment in me - i spend as quick as i earn, clothes, shoes, bags, holidays, etc he will never have any money if he chooses to be with me ha ha
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ha ha
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When we go out i am usually in the company of his friends who are mostly intelligent professional people and a few who are from "the lowest level in egyptian society" they are good people with a clear heart which is more important to me than pretentiouse upper level of egyptian society. Thank you for your advice and i wil keep it in mind while i am lying by the pool watching him run around after me like i am some sort of princess ![[Confused]](confused.gif)
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