You will sadly find yourself astray among these unpleasant haters in your original post. I took the liberty to open a new one although these creatures will still follow my scent.
Talk to your moslem lady, and discuss with her what we so far suggested.Come back with your outcome, to follow up with you.
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salama, I think you are confusing personal religion and the cultural aspects.
I don't think the thread is to do with Islam as a personal religion simply because you cannot know what this woman is like, how she practices, etc. The thing about islam as a religion is that it is a personal relationship between you and your god.
I think we are talking about the cultural aspects. Whether you agree or not, there are many who participate in the "show" of it but aren't strongly religious people.
I think he's just asking about how to deal with the outside part - so people don't talk, he doesn't embarrass her, etc.
Let them sort the actual religious issue between themselves.
(Personally, I'll never forget when I was at a wedding and a young veiled girl took off her scarf, wrapped it around her waist, did a provocative dance that would put many strip tease professionals to shame for the couple, finished, put the veil back on and sat down at her table with the rest of her family. My fellow egyptian friends explained those people just wear the veil 'for show' -that girl doesn't understand what it really means to wear it as a muslima, etc.)
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ExptinCAI, i totally agree with you! i'm very much against someone converting without really believing. my aunt married a spanish man 30 years ago, and he converted just to marry her, and now she's really suffering. she has through the years become more religous, while he is the same and it causes a lot of friction between them. Also a year ago, i was watching a religous program, and this woman called in, and told the sheikh that she married a freigner who converted just to marry her, and the sheikh told her thats very haram, because honestly who are you fooling? god? its not possible. so gobi79harry, i would suggest you do the following; first meet your girl in person see if you like each other real life is very different from the net. then if you do feel the same way, you should understand her true feelings about her religion. many people say they are athiests but deep down they have faith, so you have to talk to her, and try to understand how she truly feels. if it turns out that she is indeed an athiest,then you've removed the religous obstacle, but now you have to face the second obstacle and that is culture. egypt is a very family oriented society, its very difficult for a girl to be cut off, so you have to check if this really happened. if it did, i think you should at least attempt to help her get back in contact with her family, for you as much as for her. i mean think about it, what if after you marry her it doesnt work out, who will she come home to? who will stand beside her? if you support her decision you will be opening the gates of hell on her. cutting an egyptian from their family, is letting them live without a soul. do you really want to marry her and have her stressed, depressed, and having panic attacks in the US? if you love her, then you probably dont. Posts: 4446 | From: Egyptian in Sydney | Registered: Mar 2005
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Gobi just be carefull before you decide to do anything. Some ppl are very VERY good actors. Specially when you are the only chance for a good life. Gobi all of us have not that much info about your relationship. But just go see her for what she is really. Just be carefull... behind a smile there can be a selfish act. Understand that your culture is not the same as yours. whats normal in yours is far away from normal in hers. so when she does something that seems normal to you but totally crazy in her culture..question that..dont think she is wise and more wise than her own culture. I know three years is pretty long time. But for a person you dont meet in real life, words can be just words. A person can say a lot of wise things.. but can be really stupid when it comes to take an action. But I wish you the best..go see her... and have fun but at the same time take it really seriously. and plz understand the diff between your cultures is very big! You have to learn a lot about her culture to really understand who she really is.
And after all that if she seems to be the one you really love..i wish you the best
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gobi79harry, First of all, as some have said do not convert to Islam for the sake of marrying someone. Do you not have your own religion or should I say.. relationship with God? I have been to Egypt last August with a friend of mine and visited several places with her.. she herself has gotten herself into a terrible mess marrying an Egyptian man without knowing him, his family and friends very well. Do not mistake what I am saying I am not saying all Egyptians are bad people. They are like any other culture, sect, or nation.. good and bad in all. But I and my friend are concerned that you are getting yourself into something of which you do not know much about at all. If you are an American man going there without someone with you .. it is possible you might find yourself into all kinds of situations such as being beaten, and if you do not convert to Islam you may be killed, or possibly beaten since you are by yourself..(not wise at all) I wonder after my friends situation what you are getting yourself into, and we are very concerned about you.. One thing is for sure if you do not convert you will not be allowed to "be with her" nor to marry her. But strangely enough my friend was allowed to live with her guy until they married which was a week after arriving in Egypt. And also we are curious as to which part of Egypt she is living at. This sometimes makes a difference with some things also. By the way, we are going back the first week of June to get this marriage ended. I fear the same thing will happen to you also. I would advise you to go to these two links before making any decisions.. http://www.emircaner.com/index.htmhttp://www.erguncaner.com/Posts: 16 | From: USA | Registered: Feb 2004
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