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Author Topic: Question About Marrying An Egyptian Man
SweetiePie1978
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Back in August of this year I met a man online that I have fallen in love with. I do not want to sound like a naieve person and I had no intention of meeting someone online, but we have talked almost every day since and we both have discussed marriage. We really understand each other and I want this person to be in my life. This summer I am going to Egypt to visit him, but I have a few questions about this. Can an Egyptian man get a visa to live and work in the United States?

I would love to visit him in Egypt, but I told him I want to live here if we decide to get married. However, from what I have heard it is hard for Egyptian men to get a visa and I wanted to know if this was true or not. Neither of us has alot of money, so I we will both have to save up to do this. I care about this person very much and I want to visit him and I hope we have a future together. I am just wondering if it will be impossible for him to come to the United States if we are married.

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Graf_Genn
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Most Egyptians without much money would be very happy to have someone take them out of their situation Egypt. I have had some men in Egypt ask me to arrange them with foreign women that I know for this very purpose. I have never made those matches because I knew their intentions were to leave Egypt rather than to be good husbands. Marriage is the usual way people try to migrate to the States and Europe; yes, it is possible.
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SweetPie1978, are you aware of the cultural differences more or less you will have to face once you marry him and he comes to join you in the US?

Are you Muslim?

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Questionmarks
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Internet is covered with Egyptian men trying to get out of the country by bringing women that far that they marry them.
They do that by talking to them daily, in first instance about common matters, and slowly intensify with personal matter. This developes into a intimacy, and carefull the subject "love" is gonna be brought up.
Usually they`re not very patient in this, because it`s their main goal.
So, you know the man since August. That`s almost 4 months.
Four months ago you`ve never heard of the guy, you never have seen him, you never met him, you know nothing about him except what he told you,
and even though you want to marry him.
A total stranger from a total different culture, and a high risk for abusement and failing because of that differences.
You can marry a man and try to get him out of Egypt, it will take time and trouble, but it is possible.
But first you have to ask yourself : Is this a wise thing to do?
This forum is covered with stories about relationships. I recommend the topics written by Bubblesperson:
http://www.egyptsearch.com/forums/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=3;t=002428;p=1
http://www.egyptsearch.com/forums/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=3;t=002371;p=1
My own:
http://www.egyptsearch.com/forums/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=3;t=002380
and much, much more.
These kind of man are excellent communicators, manipulative in square;), and I think you have to be carefull.
Untill now nothing has happened, but be aware of the dangers!
Search for motives,think realistic, and stay suspiscious....

--------------------
“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.”

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Chef Mick
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sweetiepie1978, i am maried to an egy. man and we are still waiting on his visa. it is possible to have them come here be it takesa long time and money. he told me the other day that he wants me just to move to egyptand forget usa , but i want to let him come to the usa to se if he likes it , if not we will move to egypt.i will live anywhere he wants
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mysticheart
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you will find a lot of negativity here on this subject im afraid sweetiepie. Alot of us here have had very bad experiences with this and some have very good relations with their egyptian men. I have had both and am currently in a situation. All i can really say is to take your time, pay attention to whether he sticks to his words to meet you at a certain time, if he will answer his phone with others around, ask if he has discussed you with his family and what they think( none of this matters what relgion he is). If his family doesnt agree with it most likely you will not be together but will be kept visiting him. It is possible for him to come to the states though i am told by an immigration lawyer it is easier to get them here on a fiance visa than a spousal visa so the lawyer says it is best to wait until he is here to marry. Ask if he has his military papers finished, if not he cant leave egypt until he completes this paper or age 30. It was briefly mentioned here in the forum that starting Jan 1 of this coming year that men marrying foreign women are no longer exempted from military service, not sure how true this is.
Alot of things to consider, if you will come to visit make sure you meet his family and he introduces you as his girlfriend not a friend.

Just be careful as these men are sweet talkers, words true or not. An example is a man that offered me friendship and to show me around egypt as friends only then quickly started with i love you, i miss you even though we had never met and spoke online only a few times over a months time... then the statement, do you have divorce papers to which i replied yes, and he says bring them with you. Huge red flag to me, I know what divorce papers are used for and had no intentions of marrying this man , certainly not that quickly and had never let him think that we were anything more than friends.
But his words were sweet and caring and if i didnt know to be a bit cautious and to watch for certain clues i would have fallen hard. Good looking man and so so sweet.
Just be careful, not saying dont trust him, just pay attention to every detail of everything

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Polina
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Sweetpie,I really know how do u feel right now coz one month ago I was in the same situation as u r now!I had also met a guy from Egy. online,also we were talking every day online,he was calling me too...By the time we get at the subject of marriage....Imagine that!!!Anyway,I heared abt this forum and ask ppl abt thier opinion.Here u can find several cases where is true love included(abd those girl r really the lucky ones)But most of others,including myself,were in the wrong direction...So be very carefull and try to read more topics on that subject on this forum...It will make u situation more clear!Have my best and wish u that ur guy is not the fake one!
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martha
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SweeitPie please use some caution. I know it's hard when a handsome exotic man gives you so much attention.

Yes, it is possible to get him here. But please be warned, it may be harder than you think. As you said you do not have much money. There are income reguirements you must meet to sponsor him. And if you don't meet them, you will have to have a co-sponsor. And that's not an easy thing to do. Unless you have family and friends that support your decision and are willing to help.

But in my experience people are too scared to take on the responsiblility, especially they don't know and trust the man as you do.

You can research more about this on www.uscis.gov

I wish you the best in whatever happens.

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SweetiePie1978
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Thank you for all the good information and I will think about it before I make my final decision. I am a Chrisitan and he is a Muslim, but I told him that I was okay with our kids being Muslim if that is what he really wants. Honestly I really want to make this work, but I will have to think about all the pro and cons. Thanks once again.
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yorkshire rose
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girl, just go over and meet him, and check the whole situation out first, then see how you feel and talk marriage then

better to do this, i went over and loved it, but i would never be able to convert, but everyones different, maybe this life would suit you

good luck, take a trip there

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Truedevotion
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Hi Sweetpie!

I am sure you are in love and he "seems" to be so lovely.
But please try to understand that your image of him is now only based on what he says. It can be true or not.
Sometimes person who seems very attractive in a picture, talk to etc. feels totally different in reality.

It would be good idea to meet him at first and then make further plans if needed.

You should meet his family, see what kind he is with his friends, what kind of past he has with women...
Good idea would be also to let your family and friends get to know him personally.

Of course it is your decision, but mothers, close friends...they have not roseglasses on now and they may see things what you don´t. Just for your advise:)

Marriage is a big commitment, you have no need to rush. If he is the right one you have plenty of time and things will fall on their place.

Good luck! Enjoy youf feelings, but use common and sixt sense:)

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FlyingTrucks
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dont dwell on what might be and what cannot be if you feel you can meet and get on rememebr having a relationship online is not like it in rea life when you meet is when you get to know the person ..so just enjoy and take the ride and see what corner it turns ..good luck ...you dont know sumone really until your married and live with them im learned there...
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bob the dog
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quote:
Originally posted by SweetiePie1978:
Thank you for all the good information and I will think about it before I make my final decision. I am a Chrisitan and he is a Muslim, but I told him that I was okay with our kids being Muslim if that is what he really wants. Honestly I really want to make this work, but I will have to think about all the pro and cons. Thanks once again.

You're talking about your kids???? Omygod..... you've never even met the man!!!!
[Eek!] [Eek!] [Eek!] GET A GRIP!!!!!

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alma37
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Yeah really, what's wrong with you?
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Truedevotion
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I understand Sweetpie in a way. If you are ready to love and having a relationship, it is quite easy to fall in love with sweet egyptian in a grey boring day.
Then it blows away reasonable thoughts, because it is so lovely to talk about sweet things and dream.

I guess, quite many talk about kids, like how many you would like to have, even in first date. It doesn´t have to be too serious. Maybe on this matter Sweetpie and that man only "solved" one thing which could have happened to be a problem in the future, if they stay together.

Somehow it is a luck, they haven´t met, because they have time to get to know each other more and when they meet, things may fall slowly on their place, whatever it will be.

Naturally it is harder to get to know someone only writing mails and talking in internet.

Please girls, don´t judge. If you have been in love you know you do and act sometimes weird way. Let´s give good advices and support her:)

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Sameh A
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SweetiePie1978 ,

If he's a professional , or with good financial position , he would easily get a visa or residence anywhere....

I have 2 advices for you :

First , you shouldn't discuss marriage before meeting each other....Chemistry is important , isn't it ? [Smile]

2 nd , Don't be discouraged by people who " volunteer " to advise you to be cautious and some paranoid who think that all Egyptians just want to leave Egypt......Actually , more than 20% of Egyptians are professionals and have high life standards in Egypt....They don't need to leave anywhere [Smile]

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Sameh

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Graf_Genn
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SweetiePie1978 clearly stated that they do not have good financial positions,
quote:
Neither of us has alot of money
so getting residence is not likely to come easy for him. Which goes back to the caution of people without means in Egypt wanting to get out by getting married.
Perhaps I am one of these paranoid people you are referring to, because I have my own worries about attracting women just because of wealth. If so, guilty as charged [Big Grin] Feel free to ignore me due to my paranoia, but I am being 100% honest when I say that I have had men ask me to arrange them with foreign women so they can get a chance at leaving the country.

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daria1975
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Hey, Graf-Genn. Can you hide the fact you have money? Don't know how easy that is to do...I understand your paranoia (not that I share it, because I don't have the $$ to cause concern). [Wink]

But I definitely would want someone who wants me just for me, not my bank account.

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Graf_Genn
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The reason I joined this forum was because there was a topic about something similar, and I was hoping to get some advice from the fine people that share their thoughts here. Unfortunately they all told me to stick to "my own kind" because all women are capable of beguiling charm [Frown]
I can hide it at first since I am not very extravagant in general, but as soon as they ask about my work or hobbies it will be exposed. I could lie about that I guess, but it isn't really in my character.
I have recently been in touch with an old sweetheart that I believe loved me for me, but I basically ruined that. I am trying to break the ice for when I return to England (hopefully I will get to see her) but I feel like a fool so I am treading pretty carefully.

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SayWhatYouSee
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Graf-Genn,

I don't want to sound negative but I would caution anyone about revealing personal details on this forum. You seem like a nice person and there are good people here. There are also those that will spit any detail back at you, in a debate or invent what they don't know. You may already have observed this or completely disagree with me. It is, of course, up to you. [Smile] [Cool]

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daria1975
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quote:
Originally posted by Graf_Genn:
The reason I joined this forum was because there was a topic about something similar, and I was hoping to get some advice from the fine people that share their thoughts here. Unfortunately they all told me to stick to "my own kind" because all women are capable of beguiling charm [Frown]
I can hide it at first since I am not very extravagant in general, but as soon as they ask about my work or hobbies it will be exposed. I could lie about that I guess, but it isn't really in my character.
I have recently been in touch with an old sweetheart that I believe loved me for me, but I basically ruined that. I am trying to break the ice for when I return to England (hopefully I will get to see her) but I feel like a fool so I am treading pretty carefully.

Men *and* women are capable of beguiling charm to get what they want. I agree it would be easier if you stuck to your own socio-economic class. But of course time reveals all with people...just depends how much you want to risk your heart in the process.
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Graf_Genn
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@SayWhatYouSee:
I have indeed observed that, and I don't think I have revealed anything I would be uncomfortable about being reminded about. The forum still seems a rather anonymous place for discourse. Thanks for the warning [Smile]


@Tream Lefty:
Surely it is both men and women, though I am only worried about the women as men aren't anything attractive to me [Razz]
I still don't like the idea of limiting myself to my own class (because I have close friends from all classes) but the advice given from the ladies here seemed to indicate that they wouldn't trust women much themselves [Confused] ... yet come to think of it, I don't advise women to hold much faith in trusting men, either [Razz]

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al-Kahina
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quote:
Originally posted by Graf_Genn:
The reason I joined this forum was because there was a topic about something similar, and I was hoping to get some advice from the fine people that share their thoughts here. Unfortunately they all told me to stick to "my own kind" because all women are capable of beguiling charm [Frown]
I can hide it at first since I am not very extravagant in general, but as soon as they ask about my work or hobbies it will be exposed. I could lie about that I guess, but it isn't really in my character.
I have recently been in touch with an old sweetheart that I believe loved me for me, but I basically ruined that. I am trying to break the ice for when I return to England (hopefully I will get to see her) but I feel like a fool so I am treading pretty carefully.

Actually I was the one who told you to stick to your own kind.

Not because I thought you were to be taken advantage of by women with "beguiling charm" but that you are oblivious to how rich people are percieved by non rich. And that I don't think you have the sensitivity or personal development to connect with someone outside of your socio-economic bracket.

Its not you being taken advantage of, I am sure your mother will look out for you in that manner, but you have an inability to understand how other people who don't have your financial privilage view you!

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Graf_Genn
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There was that, too [Razz]
Though, I definitely recall other people saying it for the other reasons [Smile]
So, you can save the women from my insensitive and underdeveloped treatment, and others save me from the heartless greed of women [Wink] The world is now quite safe.

In the beginning you have told me straight that you don't like people of much wealth, so despite our usually pleasant exchanges I am not particularly surprised when you think ill of me even though you have "known" me for all of 160 posts. Then again, if you think such things about me I am sure others do as well [Big Grin]

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TAREK307
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First thing, he could be muslim or christian, either way Religion doesn't matter in this subject, culture is still the same, he is EGYPTIAN.. If he actually loves you then he will do all he can to come see you WITHOUT any promises from you of marriage....if he insists on Marriage then, maybe its his Main goal

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