posted
Hello my dear friends!!!!! I'm back ) I liked my holidays a lot!!!! Unfortunately, i didn't swim in the sea and i always was cold but anyway it was nice ) My friend met a guy there. And now we have a lot of questions concerning this topic because he's a christian egyptian guy. I do understand most things, customs, traditions of muslim man but as for christian in Egypt - know nothing. Please, help us
I got some info already but it seems to me like general info as for usual everyday life here i have this kind of questions:
For example, couple walks in the street, is it the same like with a muslim guy, they should have some paper in order that police can stop them or for christian it doesn't work?
as for staying in a hotel? can it be arranged to stay together or it's prohibited ?
as for traveling around the country, to go to different cities? can they go together? or it's better to keep aside or have some docs?
As for dressing? it's not prohibited to wear whatever the girl wants? to stay in a beach? to swim?
As i understand only muslim women cover their heads and christians - no? i mean in Egypt?
And as for intercourses before marriage is that ok? it's like everywhere in the world?
And as i understand if they marry, men cannot have any other marriages like orfi with other girls if just he's cheating mean meet with others and that's all?
posted
I think this Egyptian Christian is a big fib. Unless he is going to walk round the streets of Cairo holding a 1.5 meter wooden Cross, I think police would stop him for being an idiot. Many moslem women don't veil their heads. As for hotels, most hotels don't allow it, but he can get a couple of rooms, and sneak in (carring his 1.5 meter cross) to her room. As for INTERCOURSE before marriage, if he is capable to perform him duties, that's fine. Usually, there is no sex after marriage. I sense that our friend is a bit scared of the big event.
Posts: 477 | From: Egypt | Registered: Jan 2004
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quote:Originally posted by jaguar: I think this Egyptian Christian is a big fib. Unless he is going to walk round the streets of Cairo holding a 1.5 meter wooden Cross, I think police would stop him for being an idiot. Many moslem women don't veil their heads. As for hotels, most hotels don't allow it, but he can get a couple of rooms, and sneak in (carring his 1.5 meter cross) to her room. As for INTERCOURSE before marriage, if he is capable to perform him duties, that's fine. Usually, there is no sex after marriage. I sense that our friend is a bit scared of the big event.
This is so funny, but such a great explanation!!!
Jamilah, please tell your friend to relax do you think that the police goes around bugging people in Cairo, asking them about their religion? Unless your friend looks scared to death no one will bother her, unless her fiancé looks scared to death he he he....
An important note though: when it comes to what he will accept for her to wear, to do, to say, and especially when to breath ... it really depends on his education, his logic, his intelligence, his personality, his social class, the degree of his religious involvement, how decent he really is... and regardless of wether he is a Muslim or a Christian.
Wether he will take her to a hotel room , 2 hotel rooms, a house, an apartment that is all up to her. Women usually give the green light, as far as I know, unless they are being attacked!
And about marriage, wether he cheats or marries someone else, ORFI or else, isn't that the same pain/insult to the wife???
It all boils down to who the people are, their self respect, their love for each other, their commitment to each other. In terms of religion and traditions HE follows, she should ask him! They should communicate.
A 'real' little story: A Christian Egyptian - from Italian descent - who could not get a divorce, was so unhappy with his wife same as him Christian Egyptian from Italian descent -, even though they had a beautiful love story, decided to have a new life...he went to the Islamic side, became a Muslim, married another woman and had his way while in Egypt. A few years later, this same man was forced to leave the country as he found a greater business opportunity in Italy; and when in Rome...he was Christian again...the first wife never divorced him, because it was not possible to obtain..., she followed him to Italy, sued his pants off, got everything she could under the Italian law, and lived happily ever after.
Jamilah, carissima, great to hear you had a nice holiday girl, you sound happy!
Monica
[This message has been edited by Monica (edited 23 January 2004).]
posted
Ok, guys! I understand it doesn't matter what kind of religion he has it depends on the country he lives. Ok, i got it, so the same rules, the same customs and the way of thinking... Am I right?
Monica, ciao carissima!!! Come stai? Sto bene ma nostro storia d'amore per sempre con il mio ragazzo e' finito
I know that you mean that you are opened to new opportunities on an international level ...Hope you meet the 'right' one soon! maybe someone from this board, who knows????
posted
Internet love story u mean? oh, for this kind of relationships i don't know yet but international level yes, you are right. Why not?!?! How are you darling? Are you going somewhere to business trip? Which country?
quote:Originally posted by Monica: Jamilah,
I know that you mean that you are opened to new opportunities on an international level ...Hope you meet the 'right' one soon! maybe someone from this board, who knows????
posted
I came back from Europe a few weeks ago ( check the Monica thread) where I also had the pleasure to meet with msjen. It was great.
Next business trip is at the end of March, going to Malta again, to wrap up a project.
Internet love: well, I hear good stories and some that are not so great...
In any case, if any relationship gets serious with an Egyptian meet, and get to know his family before it's too late!!!
Ciao cara, Monica
quote:Originally posted by Jamilah: Internet love story u mean? oh, for this kind of relationships i don't know yet but international level yes, you are right. Why not?!?! How are you darling? Are you going somewhere to business trip? Which country?
posted
So, till the end of the March you're staying in...? But from the other side you have a rest now Wish you good luck at work!!! we have a busy season now, a lot of projects but that's good!!!
To get an egyptian man yeah it's better to get his family first but do i need it? this is a question Anyway time will show us... i need it or not...
quote:Originally posted by Monica: I came back from Europe a few weeks ago ( check the Monica thread) where I also had the pleasure to meet with msjen. It was great.
Next business trip is at the end of March, going to Malta again, to wrap up a project.
Internet love: well, I hear good stories and some that are not so great...
In any case, if any relationship gets serious with an Egyptian meet, and get to know his family before it's too late!!!
posted
Wow, sorry i missed something, you both you and Msjen met in Europe, wow, incredible!!!! So? how was it????
quote:Originally posted by Monica: I came back from Europe a few weeks ago ( check the Monica thread) where I also had the pleasure to meet with msjen. It was great.
Next business trip is at the end of March, going to Malta again, to wrap up a project.
Internet love: well, I hear good stories and some that are not so great...
In any case, if any relationship gets serious with an Egyptian meet, and get to know his family before it's too late!!!
posted
msjen and I had a wonderful time in Dusseldorf, many discussions and many laughs. It was a very positive experience. If you go to the 'Monica' thread, you will read a bit more details.
About if you need it, I did'nt understand, you meant an Egyptian or the family?? well if you are with an Egyptian, the family plays a great deal in his life in general.
But there are some Egyptian families that accept a 'foreigner' as a wife.
When Adoula reads your post, I'm sure he will have something to add concerning this topic. I remember he said somewhere that he was going on a business trip, to Malaysia.
Ciao, alla prossima, Monica
QUOTE]Originally posted by Jamilah: Wow, sorry i missed something, you both you and Msjen met in Europe, wow, incredible!!!! So? how was it????
[/QUOTE]
[This message has been edited by Monica (edited 23 January 2004).]
posted
Hi Jamilah, The simplest answer is: religion is a person's beliefs. Some people worship in a church, synagogue, temple, mosque or other building with others who share their beliefs. Others do not.
But if those people are living in one country, so they must accept the country rules, may be it Islamic rules like in Egypt, Malaysia, Saudi Arabia, ....etc.
May be it is Christian like in Italy, some other countries in Europe, and may be it is only a rules to control things in daily life without any relation with relegion.
Now, it is clear that is what goes for an Egyptian Moslem, goes for an Egyptian Christian.
No arrangements to stay in one room with someone except his wife, ok for orfi marriage, go to swim even nude, but if only in a private pool or a nude beach (unfortunately we don't have such), but if in public must respect others...and so on.
So let us say or talk about Egyptian rules controling our daily life, and if U or your friend will be adapted to it or not?
posted
Hello Adoula, Thank you for your reply!!!!! As i know you are Christian living in Egypt Yes, i thought about it and understand that children of different religion grow up in the same country, go to the same schools and play the same toys... Read the same books - i mean in general of couse with the difference in religion - Karan or Bible. Rules are the same but i guess there should be less lie. For muslem its not allowed to meet with the girl before marriage that's why they invented orfi but as for christians - it should be more simple! why then they should have this orfi? just because of tourist police? (i want to get know before he can ask her about it but may be he will not, we have to be informed in all questions) Wait a moment, i want to clear this thing concerning orfi - Christians cannot have 2-4 marriagies, only as maximum one, yes? of couse depends of the man and his honesty. Another thing, to get to know his family is the first thing that girls should do before any intercourses if she wants to get him, right? Here is a cultural difference because usually our parents get know that we're going to marry before month or three of this event even after living together for 3-5 years, hm... Ok, it's the end yet but i hope to hear from you soon!!!!!
quote:Originally posted by Adoula: Hi Jamilah, The simplest answer is: religion is a person's beliefs. Some people worship in a church, synagogue, temple, mosque or other building with others who share their beliefs. Others do not.
But if those people are living in one country, so they must accept the country rules, may be it Islamic rules like in Egypt, Malaysia, Saudi Arabia, ....etc.
May be it is Christian like in Italy, some other countries in Europe, and may be it is only a rules to control things in daily life without any relation with relegion.
Now, it is clear that is what goes for an Egyptian Moslem, goes for an Egyptian Christian.
No arrangements to stay in one room with someone except his wife, ok for orfi marriage, go to swim even nude, but if only in a private pool or a nude beach (unfortunately we don't have such), but if in public must respect others...and so on.
So let us say or talk about Egyptian rules controling our daily life, and if U or your friend will be adapted to it or not?
quote:Originally posted by Jamilah: Hello Adoula, Thank you for your reply!!!!! As i know you are Christian living in Egypt Yes, i thought about it and understand that children of different religion grow up in the same country, go to the same schools and play the same toys... Read the same books - i mean in general of couse with the difference in religion - Karan or Bible. Rules are the same but i guess there should be less lie. For muslem its not allowed to meet with the girl before marriage that's why they invented orfi.
I don't agree with U any more, Muslems also are allowed to meet with girls, like in any part of this world they meet in clubs, schools, universities, and work.
We should accept that what is forbidden in Islam is seeking privacy with someone of the opposite sex without a third party present...
What we need is firstly to recognise that there is nothing at all wrong with young people meeting in situations where intimacy cannot occur because of witnesses; and secondly to create occasions in which they can meet safely in halal ways, so that they CAN get to know each other.
The more of these occasions we can organise, whether family events or mosque events or conference events, the better. I also heartily recommend that males and females find at least some opportunities for sitting together at meals, and conversing afterwards.
But as for christians - it should be more simple! why then they should have this orfi? just because of tourist police? (i want to get know before he can ask her about it but may be he will not, we have to be informed in all questions) Wait a moment, i want to clear this thing concerning orfi - Christians cannot have 2-4 marriagies, only as maximum one, yes? of couse depends of the man and his honesty. [/QUOTE]
U R right, but please consider the economoic situation, if the young Christian man want to marry an Egyptian woman, the cost is horrible, she needs a flat, a shabka ...etc., so some Christians find it easy to go to Orfi, either with Egyptian or with foreigner.
Second, limitations on free sexual relations lead many young people to orfi marriage with all its conceived problems.
Third, regardless of the relegion, some ME consider A Western woman is a walking passport! so they go to Orfi marriage for getting some documents to travel abroad.
I know plenty of Arab (Egyptian, Jordanian and even Gulfie) males who love to boast of the "stupid rich foreign woman" they married on the side (often with a non-legal Orfi marriage) simply to use her for money, a visa or sex, or just a fashion statement. Older women are the preferred victims (they're considered wealthier, more gullible to flattery and more aggressive in bed). The arrangement is great for him...
Another thing, to get to know his family is the first thing that girls should do before any intercourses if she wants to get him, right? Here is a cultural difference because usually our parents get know that we're going to marry before month or three of this event even after living together for 3-5 years, hm... Ok, it's the end yet but i hope to hear from you soon!!!!! [/QUOTE]
Yes, this is a cultural thing. The dominant attitude about sex in Egypt is that it is a very private matter and it should be contained within the domain of marriage.
------------------ Regards adoula777@yahoo.com
[This message has been edited by Adoula (edited 26 January 2004).]
posted
Mmmm, i see... But as for shabka and etc. so conditions are the same for christians as for muslems? wow, that's smth new for me.. mmm, i'm sure you know some sites giving info about Christans in Egypt and their traditions, rules, customs may be you share with me, please!!! I think it's better i will get acquainted with it and will ask you if i don't understand anything, ok? Thank you for your promt answer!!!!!!!!!!!!
quote:Originally posted by Adoula: Yes, this is a cultural thing
posted
Oh, yeah, Adoula, believe me i used to know such guys and I had a shock but thanks God not even one of them made a cent out of me!!!! Thank you for your care
quote:Originally posted by Adoula: I know plenty of Arab (Egyptian, Jordanian and even Gulfie) males who love to boast of the "stupid rich foreign woman" they married on the side (often with a non-legal Orfi marriage) simply to use her for money, a visa or sex, or just a fashion statement. Older women are the preferred victims (they're considered wealthier, more gullible to flattery and more aggressive in bed). The arrangement is great for him...
quote:Originally posted by Adoula: Jamilah, My private e-mail is below, U can write to me, and I will send U a thousands of URL talking about Egyptian culture.
UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!
) I liked my holidays a lot!!!! Unfortunately, i didn't swim in the sea and i always was cold but anyway it was nice 
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