posted
This is true and it applies to most guys I know. We simply hate to ask questions(or directions) and its like a conditioned mindset that is not beneficial at all. Does this bother some of the ladies here? Does it annoy you that your man does not ask questions or enough questions when you guys are buying something or getting some kind of service? What about the Guys here are you like this or are you an aberration from the typical male species.
Posts: 2079 | From: 'by any means necessary' - Malcom X | Registered: Mar 2007
| IP: Logged |
posted
so true !!! and you already mentioned 'asking for directions' ... I am thinking about traffic directions !! Men would rather die ( than asking for the right way ... (for example on a trip) They rather drive the wrong way for kilometres than opening their car-window and just ask it to someone. It doesn't bother me but it always makes me smile because it is so typical male behaviour.
Posts: 2932 | From: Just now and then | Registered: Nov 2006
| IP: Logged |
posted
My husband has selective questioning capabilities. If we are making a purchase the questions abound, when it comes to other things (what time does the doctor arrive, which way is this building, etc.) he is quiet as a mouse. Doesn't really bother me that much...I'm pretty easy going. Posts: 13440 | Registered: Feb 2006
| IP: Logged |
posted
Yes it bothers me, particularly in a workplace environment! I've spent most of my life working or studying in predominantly male environments. When I was in my final year of my BSc, I was the only female in many of my classes and the guys would all ask me to ask their questions for them because they were scared of looking stupid! For workplace examples, when presenting analytical reports at work, I know for a fact that most senior managers (mainly men) cannot understand or interpret a graph but they will never admit it and I trained my analysts never to present graphical material without putting 3 bullet points stating "why this graph is interesting" on it. The analysts, being mathematically inclined, found this hard at first believing graphs spoke for themselves, and would then get frustrated when management didn't appear to be 'listening' - fact was they didn't understand. I told them they have to spell it out for the boss class!
Same thing is true in meetings where lots of jargon is used, and no one asks what it means. I have to say that having a PhD is very useful - an official 'I'm cleverer than you' certificate allows me to ask many more 'silly' or 'obvious' questions - if I don't understand something there's a fair chance 99% of the rest don't either!
Posts: 5593 | From: Egypt | Registered: Dec 2005
| IP: Logged |
posted
My asking questions complex is basically like this:
-I feel reluctant to ask many questions -I feel that it is a waste of time
It’s like men give up too easily. I mean yesterday when I found the Ricotta cheese to be too expensive I gave up. But the woman in my life had to inquire and as a result it paid off for us as we found an alternative cheese that tasted great. As a result of my complex I have come to love brochures, give me a brochure and I will find all the answers I need, thank you very much. Also I would prefer clearer signs that are more accurate over the opinion of a mere man.
Really Mishkilleh
Posts: 2079 | From: 'by any means necessary' - Malcom X | Registered: Mar 2007
| IP: Logged |
posted
My husband is the opposite. He can get to the point of bugging the shet out of someone with questions. Of course, most of the time he wants me to ask the questions.
Posts: 2735 | From: my desk | Registered: Jul 2005
| IP: Logged |
quote:Originally posted by Mother War: Of course, most of the time he wants me to ask the questions.
Ok but that doesn't count, we all ask that of our women
Thats because we know all the answers ) My boyfriend loves to ask questions and expand his data base, I really love this about him! Posts: 1121 | From: Too crazy to look at a freakin map to find out.. | Registered: Sep 2006
| IP: Logged |
posted
I have a read a research but forget the source, it said that Men are good navigator but Women are not.
Posts: 756 | From: ...be solution... | Registered: Jul 2007
| IP: Logged |
posted
I've heard that too, that mens brains remember directions better. I watched an experiment once where they took 5 men and 5 women to a VERY large mall-type parking lot (one that none of them had ever been to). They had them park VERY far away from where they were enterting the building and asked them to remain in the building a few hours and shop, look around, etc. They watched when each of them came out to find their cars, how well they did at remembering and how long it took them. They men (mostly) went straight to their cars and the women had to stop and look around, think, walk a little back and fourth before locating theirs.
Later when interviewed they were asked what they did to remember where they parked. The men remembered parking by a particular tree or street lamp while the women remembered parking simply by the alignment of the car to the building. The researchers showed this didn't work as well because there is so much room on the side of a building to forget easily where as landmarks are easier (as the men did).
On a side note: I thought my car was stolen once, I was in tears running around the parking lot knowing I had parked RIGHT THERE, finally got a security guard in a golf cart to drive me around before finding it in a completely different area of the parking lot altogether. I felt like an idiot but he laughed assuring me it happens more than people think...after that I began remembering where I parked the way the men do, with the landmarks. Posts: 13440 | Registered: Feb 2006
| IP: Logged |
posted
Maybe you`ll like to read this part about HOW to ask questions to get the answers you want to hear. Especially the theory about a special characteristic/technique called "Socratic ignorance" (Google on that) is about how to be able to see a situation in several perspectives, to get a complete view, AND getting answers to your questions. http://www.1000ventures.com/business_guide/crosscuttings/communication_questions.html Sincere Socratic ignorance is crucial.To not judge and think you know the answers without asking, but a unhibited not-knowing. The best example is the way children are wondering about everything around them, thinking nothing is obvious. Only by sincere Socratic ignorance this kind of questions will help them to see new perspectives to the situation and see their own part in it. If this ignorance is not there, we`ll get a kind of hostile situation, and questions are useless, like cognitive therapists stating: If you don`t want to hear the answer, don`t ask questions...
-------------------- “Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.” Posts: 7202 | From: EU | Registered: Nov 2006
| IP: Logged |
quote:Originally posted by Mother War: Of course, most of the time he wants me to ask the questions.
Ok but that doesn't count, we all ask that of our women
Thats because we know all the answers ) My boyfriend loves to ask questions and expand his data base, I really love this about him!
Yeah yeah you know the answers, women simply have no kind of bashfulness when it comes to asking a million questions. It's their nature
Women could ask a million questions and have instructions in front of them and still can't hook up an entertainment center. (I am generalizing here)
Yap yap yap .... types are most constructive when they ask questions Posts: 2079 | From: 'by any means necessary' - Malcom X | Registered: Mar 2007
| IP: Logged |
quote:Originally posted by Mother War: Of course, most of the time he wants me to ask the questions.
Ok but that doesn't count, we all ask that of our women
Thats because we know all the answers ) My boyfriend loves to ask questions and expand his data base, I really love this about him!
Yeah yeah you know the answers, women simply have no kind of bashfulness when it comes to asking a million questions. It's their nature
Women could ask a million questions and have instructions in front of them and still can't hook up an entertainment center. (I am generalizing here)
Yap yap yap .... types are most constructive when they ask questions
So why, in an office full of male engineers, designing buildings, managing electrical and heating installations, is the only person who can fix the photocopier the 18 year old female general assistant? Posts: 5593 | From: Egypt | Registered: Dec 2005
| IP: Logged |
posted
Why when you share a house with a man, he'll ask you were something is kept, like he's just visiting. You say 2nd drawer down. He says it's not there. You go to the drawer lift something off the top and voila there it is!
Posts: 4476 | From: Scotland | Registered: Mar 2006
| IP: Logged |
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: Why when you share a house with a man, he'll ask you were something is kept, like he's just visiting. You say 2nd drawer down. He says it's not there. You go to the drawer lift something off the top and voila there it is!
Thats cause its hard work for him i have it the same with the other 2men in the house my son is blind as a bat and i can see it he can see it but i still have to give it to him . Like this one are you out of bath yet ,"yes mam " are you dressed "no mam " then why not?"IM WAITING FOR MY PANTS " what am i brain scanner now i see all Posts: 178 | Registered: Jul 2007
| IP: Logged |
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: Why when you share a house with a man, he'll ask you were something is kept, like he's just visiting. You say 2nd drawer down. He says it's not there. You go to the drawer lift something off the top and voila there it is!
ooooo my god i know that makes me so mad selective eye sight
Posts: 9776 | From: You like If only mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood. | Registered: Jul 2007
| IP: Logged |
posted
It's a case of if something doesn't jump up and down in front of them, waving a neon light it's not there.
Posts: 4476 | From: Scotland | Registered: Mar 2006
| IP: Logged |
UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
than asking for the right way ... (for example on a trip) They rather drive the wrong way for kilometres than opening their car-window and just ask it to someone.![[Smile]](smile.gif)
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
I felt like an idiot but he laughed assuring me it happens more than people think...after that I began remembering where I parked the way the men do, with the landmarks. ![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
![[Mad]](mad.gif)
Printer-friendly view of this topic