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Chef Mick
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THE ATHEIST AND THE MARINE

( God this doesn't get any better)

A United States Marine was attending some college courses between assignments. He had completed missions in Iraq and Afghanistan.


One of the courses had a professor who was a vowed atheist and a member of the ACLU.

One day the professor shocked the class when he came in. He looked to the ceiling and flatly stated, "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you exactly 15 minutes."


The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop. Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, "Here I am God. I'm still waiting." It got down to the last couple of minutes when the Marine got out of his chair, went up to the professor, and cold-cocked him; knocking him off the platform. The professor was out cold.


The Marine went back to his seat and sat there, silently. The other students were shocked and stunned and sat there looking on in silence.


The professor eventually came to, noticeably shaken, looked at the Marine and asked, "What the hell is the matter with you? Why did you do that?" The Marine calmly replied, "God was too busy today protecting America's soldiers who are protecting your right to say stupid **** and act like an asshole. So, He sent me."

Posts: 9443 | From: USA...... | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
tina m
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hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhahahahahahah
that was a good one lol

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your ass is so tight when you fart only a dog can hear it.when you queef only a cat can hear that one.

Posts: 9776 | From: You like If only mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood. | Registered: Jul 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Hopefloats Always
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This is excellant! lol lol

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Brenda

Posts: 73 | From: United States | Registered: Jul 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Chef Mick
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> WHORES & HOCKEY PLAYERS.
>
>
> A man in the Florida supermarket tries to buy half a head of lettuce.
> The very young produce assistant tells him that they sell only whole
> heads of lettuce.
>
> The man persists and asks to see the manager.
>
> The boy says he'll ask his manager about it.
>
> Walking into the back room, the boy said to his manager, 'Some asshole
> wants to buy half a head of lettuce.' As he finished his sentence, he
> turned to find the man standing right behind him, so he added, 'And this
> gentleman has kindly offered to buy the other half.'
>
> The manager approved the deal, and the man went on his way.
>
> Later the manager said to the boy, 'I was impressed with the way you got
> yourself out of that situation earlier. We like people who think on
> their feet here. Where are you from, son?'
>
> 'Canada, sir,' the boy replied.
>
> 'Well, why did you leave Canada?' the manager asked.
>
> The boy said, 'Sir, there's nothing but whores and hockey players up
> there.'
>
> 'Really?' said the manager. 'My wife is from Canada.'
>
> 'No ****?' replied the boy. 'Who'd she play for?'

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Hopefloats Always
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This was great!!!!!! lol

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Brenda

Posts: 73 | From: United States | Registered: Jul 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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