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Author Topic: Why Do Egyptian Men Refuse To divorce
artisha
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Hi

Its strange but true.. I have heard of many women being married to Egyptian men and they have separated. When the women ask for divorce the man refuses. But in the meantime he is looking for another women to sleep with and be with whilst they are separated. This is known as orfi marriage. Apparently some men cannot live without sex...

Whats your opinions on this?

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Questionmarks
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A woman in Egypt can always divorce, even without her husbands agreement. But that seems to be unhonourable for both.

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“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.”

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artisha
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I understand that a women can divorce although this would be a lengthy procedure. I am also talking about foreign nationals not only Egyptian women who live outside of Egypt who want to divorce and are separated. They have no way of reuniting the marriage but husband still does not want to divorce.

For example some Egyptian men don't divorce their first wives whom they have children before they go on and marry another in orfi marriage. Or they marry a foreign national in another country whom does not realise he is already legally married in Egypt.

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What exactly is your question, Artisha?

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“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.”

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bob the dog
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Artisha... you seem confused!!
marriage (REAL MOJ marriage) and orfi marriage are 2 different things!!
An orfi marriage is just a piece of paper that allows 2 people to cohabit without hassle from the tourist police... there's no need to get a divorce from orfi.... just rip it up and move on to the next one.... it's more commonly known as a f#cking paper.

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happybunny
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If he is not around i am sure you can divorce on those grounds. Check it with a lawyer or phone CAB - citizens advice bureux.
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artisha
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I know as well as everyone else orfi is no a marriage but marriage 4 sex. As i said before whilst separated why does the men in Egypt still refuse to divorce his wife and stay married but uses orfi for the purpose of sex with another women. Why not just divorce? I ststed before this is very common practice but Why?

Wouldnt it just be easier to move on and end the marriage?

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happybunny
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Maybe they like you keep you dangling. [Wink]

Also it means that YOU are unable to get on with your life again and re-marry i think thats the reason. But the woman CAN divorce him, what does it matter - him, you, you, him as long as you get divorced. [Confused]

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artisha
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Its easier and quicker for the man to divorce than the women.
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Momma_Dukes
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because they didnt get their papers yet.
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artisha
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Call it what you want but i am absolutely baffled as to why? It simply does not make sense. What could you do to someone that you have hurt already...

How could these muslim men lie and be so deceitful to the women and treat the women so terrible and not divorce just so they can come and do it again...

I cant believe these are muslim men. It makes me feel sick. Its appalling and an abuse that probably has been going on for a decade.

Why I write about this is because i want others to know understand what happens in these situations and how to protect one self if it should happen to you...

Some of us have been through similar situations and find they don't know what to do. Coming to this website has opened my eyes not only to other peoples stories but to the truth and to what's out there.

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Shooky
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because they are men.

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Momma_Dukes
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quote:
Originally posted by artisha:
Call it what you want but i am absolutely baffled as to why? It simply does not make sense. What could you do to someone that you have hurt already...

How could these muslim men lie and be so deceitful to the women and treat the women so terrible and not divorce just so they can come and do it again...

I cant believe these are muslim men. It makes me feel sick. Its appalling and an abuse that probably has been going on for a decade.

Why I write about this is because i want others to know understand what happens in these situations and how to protect one self if it should happen to you...

Some of us have been through similar situations and find they don't know what to do. Coming to this website has opened my eyes not only to other peoples stories but to the truth and to what's out there.

well you will be suprised at how terrible muslim men can be. they seem to have the whole women are toys not equal to men and since u can ask for 4 wives they think that women are something u can jump from one to the other with.

they are kinda like mafiosos.....they always have the marriage and the respctable family, but have their goomata on the side. its just something that is done and looked at like its no big thing in egypt.

the only thing u can do is divorce him. luckily in the west u can divorce a person without needing their permission so just do it whether he likes it or not.
plus with these men, they expect u to stand by them thru everything they do wrong yet if u mess up, they are the first ones out the door.

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Ayisha
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quote:
Originally posted by artisha:
Call it what you want but i am absolutely baffled as to why? It simply does not make sense. What could you do to someone that you have hurt already...

How could these muslim men lie and be so deceitful to the women and treat the women so terrible and not divorce just so they can come and do it again...

I cant believe these are muslim men. It makes me feel sick. Its appalling and an abuse that probably has been going on for a decade.

Why I write about this is because i want others to know understand what happens in these situations and how to protect one self if it should happen to you...

Some of us have been through similar situations and find they don't know what to do. Coming to this website has opened my eyes not only to other peoples stories but to the truth and to what's out there.

depends what 'orfi' it is. White paper just rip it up and you're divorced, court registered you CAN get a divorce, its not a long process just a matter of having a line drawn thru the book in the court.

Some men here have more that 20 'orfi' contracts at the same time, some even have ones with other men. [Wink]

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Ayisha
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quote:
Originally posted by Momma_Dukes:
its just something that is done and looked at like its no big thing in egypt.


wrong MD this sort of thing IS looked down on. I dont know many men who are 'really' married to ore than one woman, its not really as common as people think or as some make it out to be. The orfi thing is different, there seems to be no limit to 4 and as per previous post some have 20 or even more and some are 'married' also to male tourists.
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SherryBlueBerry
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Well I for one know a man in Alexandria who dated this foreign woman for 5 years...always professing his undying love for her. His wife was "cold"..."argumentive"..."nothing as good in bed as his foreign lover".. and so on and so on. When foreign lady decided to move to Alex and live with the love of her life...seems he had wife..grown kids...and to divorce his wife..was an unthinkable act in Egypt...he would be turned against by his family, his kids would no longer speak to him or respect him....and so on and so on.

Wife finds out.....2 years ago...but still married to him...while he still professes his undying love to the woman he will love "infinity"....go figure...

Where is the pride in either of these women..??

Fortunately for me...I ended my relationship that was almost identical to my friends..but as soon as I found him to be married...he was a goner! I don't have time to beg and be second best.

I wanna be #1 [Smile] )

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SherryBlueBerry
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Ohhhhh and my question is...why do so many Egyptian men commit adultery, treat their wives like second class citizens...and then use the same wife as a reason to stay married!

Isn't adultery sinning...same as eating pork, or drinking in Islam? It is in Christianity?

I could never seem to get over the fact that my friend..who was married..would pray 5 times a day without fail....then leave the pray and come to my bed..all the while knowing he was married to another woman. Unfortunately for me..I didn't know it for a long long time. And then he had the balls to tell me that it was his duty as a father, husband, brother or whatever to tell his female family members that they should cover their hair..??? I wonder was it his duty to tell his son that it was mandatory that he pray 5 times a day...but that it was just as ok to jump from the pray and run to bed with mistress???

Did I miss something here?

Geeze I am on lunch and didn't mean to vent..but this thread kinda fired me up haha.

Have a good day all!

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artisha
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I get the feeling that they can get away with it.

When you see a muslim man he prays 5 times a day, goes to Jumma on Friday, fasts, gives zakat and looks after his children from previous marriage you think he is a good man. When all this time he is thinking about himself and what he can do next to this women. All the while plotting and gaining her trust and laughing and smiling. As soon as the women goes to work the plot continues behind her back.

Why stay married? Unfinished business they still havent got what they finally want.


1. a place to call home preferably with a women who does what ever she is told to do.

2.Spousal visa

3. Indefinite leave to remain

4. British Citizenship

5. Money

I,m sure everyone else can add to this list.....

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Chef Mick
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American citizenship

think they can go anywhere but home in the states

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