posted
If a husband is a good provider, gives the wife a comfortable life with maids and servants, loves her and their children. The wife doesn´t have to work, can do what she wants. The only condition is that the man is allowed to go out in the evening and no questions be asked. Could you accept that? Could this scenario be real love if both partners agree to it?
Posts: 2184 | Registered: Oct 2005
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Rather live in a cardboard box with an honest guy than tiptoe around that guy in his castle.
It wouldn't be my first or last choice - definitely not for me. Could it be love? I dunno.
Posts: 1678 | From: New Egypt Forum - http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Dec 2009
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posted
But then Jackie Kennedy did it for years. Depends on your expectations, I guess.
Posts: 1678 | From: New Egypt Forum - http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Dec 2009
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Yeah, but luxury's not all about money and having nice things, is it? A person's richness isn't measured in the things he can buy, it's measured in those he can't, isn't it?
Wow. I've turned into a hippy, man. Far out.
Posts: 1678 | From: New Egypt Forum - http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Dec 2009
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posted
Well it seems to work for footballer's wives here in the UK but personally I wouldn't put up with it, provider or no provider Posts: 4476 | From: Scotland | Registered: Mar 2006
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I am starting to think that this arrangement would be lovely. Being a mother of two working 40 hours per week and also the housewife having to wash and clean is too much. I want a provider.
Posts: 2184 | Registered: Oct 2005
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posted
No, because if he is cheating it could put me and any children I have at risk of diseases from Hepatitis to AIDS. In addition to that, if he is doing anything illegal, then the lifestyle could collapse at any time if he is caught. I couldn't allow that kind of disrespect in any relationship, don't know how some women do.
Posts: 195 | From: Nottingham, England | Registered: Jan 2009
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quote:Originally posted by anthropos: Being a mother of two working 40 hours per week and also the housewife having to wash and clean is too much.
If you are both working full time, why are you the only one doing the housework? Sounds unfair to me, it should be a shared responsibility. So instead of dreaming up unrealistic scenarios, why not talk to your husband in order to find a solution to this problem? You could also consider moving to Egypt where hiring help is affordable.
Seriously … I know single mothers here who work full time yet don't feel stressed out because they don't have to spend a considerable amount of their time cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, grocery shopping, ironing etc.
Posts: 2803 | Registered: Feb 2007
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quote:Originally posted by anthropos: Could this scenario be real love if both partners agree to it?
Yes..as long as they're not cheating on each other, man needs a break after all...woman can also have more space for morning coffees with the girls or shopping and mingling with friends, rather than mopping and doing the dishes.
That's how most elite couples live. Posts: 3219 | From: Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone. | Registered: Nov 2005
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Could this arrangement be 'real love? I've met loads of people here who live like this. 'Real love' here doesn't seem to bear much relation to anything I have experienced. But it seems to work between couples who have the same values. I used to see an old woman dragging her crippled old husband onto a plastic chair in the street, then before she went off to wash cars, she'd fetch him tea and a sandwich, and a kiss on his bald head. Now this couple I can understand. But generally .... you get what you pay for I guess. Personally I would like to think that I could swallow my pride enough to be a 'kept woman' a 'trophy wife', as I bet it has its benefits. And can be quite painfree as long as you remember not to actually care for real.
Posts: 1399 | From: alexandria | Registered: Jan 2002
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I think there are enough couples in this kind of circumstances. As long as they both agree in this, who are we to disagree?
-------------------- “Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.” Posts: 7202 | From: EU | Registered: Nov 2006
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I wonder why therefore, we all get so 'shocked' when the 'buyer' is a woman. Maybe in time ..... I know I have become so cynical over the years, but accept now that it's unrealistic of me expect an Egyptian interpretation of the concept of 'love' to be even remotely like mine.
Posts: 1399 | From: alexandria | Registered: Jan 2002
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posted
In brief and in regard to the original question, I could accept that.
If a dude is working hard to support me, my family and the home then I wouldn't mind him going out on an evening.
I go out most nights and associate with guys winding down from their day and they have their ladies either with them (babysitters are priceless) or they come out for an hour or so then return back home.
What is wrorng with him needing space, or a few hours out with the lads away from the home and work?
I would rather have a guy who provides for me being happy and content with his mates than a guy who provides for me and resents me as he has no life of his own.
Posts: 11097 | From: Cairo | Registered: May 2008
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posted
I don't think the night out is the problem. It's the no questions asked bit that's the problem.
Posts: 4476 | From: Scotland | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
I think I mis-interpreted that part, I read it in a different way but the 'no questions asked' part can also have two meanings. One is he is a shady bastard who needs bromide or the other is there is total trust and there is no need for questions.
You gotta decide whether or not you are being used like a doormat or not.
Tbh, if it were me, I would just get a babysitter and go out myself and tell him 'no questions asked' and see how he likes it.
I believe in equality Posts: 11097 | From: Cairo | Registered: May 2008
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quote:Originally posted by young at heart: I don't think the night out is the problem. It's the no questions asked bit that's the problem.
Absolutely. Of course each has to have time to themselves, but why the need for secrecy?
It's not just that they could be playing away. Maybe you've accidentally married into the Sopranos?
(I don't mean you personally, it was a hypothetical answer)
Posts: 1678 | From: New Egypt Forum - http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Dec 2009
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posted
I think that what rattled my cage was the implication that if a guy throws enough money and stuff at a woman, [and it is clearly a one-way deal] she is contracted to not question his whereabouts. Contracted. We all believe in personal freedom, for one's husband to go out and see friends, have fun etc. It's normal. But to suggest that that right is HIS alone, and bought, and paid for, is a bit demeaning to both parties.
Posts: 1399 | From: alexandria | Registered: Jan 2002
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quote:Originally posted by Mo Ning Min E: I think that what rattled my cage was the implication that if a guy throws enough money and stuff at a woman, [and it is clearly a one-way deal] she is contracted to not question his whereabouts. Contracted. We all believe in personal freedom, for one's husband to go out and see friends, have fun etc. It's normal. But to suggest that that right is HIS alone, and bought, and paid for, is a bit demeaning to both parties.
Exactly. That's why women tend to get half here (at least) in a divorce settlement where kids are involved. She may not be physically going out and earning the money, but her contribution to the family, i.e. raising the kids, has no less value. It probably has more. Why should he get the right to plead the 5th, and why would he need to unless there's trouble at 'mill?
I only ask lots of questions when I smell a rat.
Posts: 1678 | From: New Egypt Forum - http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Dec 2009
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