Women say they want a nice guy, yet usually end up dating bad boys. Here's why.
By Lucia . Not real: Nice guys are too nice. No one can always be that nice unless they’re a saint. They are busy being nice instead of being real and women instinctually don’t trust that. Bad boys “keep it real”. Nice guys don’t want to upset the apple cart.
Respect: No one respects a doormat. Nice guys don’t set boundaries or make any real demands. A bad boy doesn’t let a woman walk all over him or control him. Women can’t respect a man they can control. No respect = No attraction.
Predictable: Most people lead boring, predictable lives, so they’re attracted to people who are exciting and a bit unpredictable. Bad boys are always a challenge. Nice guys are never a challenge. Predictable + No excitement + No challenge = I prefer a bad boy. Mother Nature: Women are designed to nurture. However, instead of doing this with children, they often end up doing it with bad boys. They think their love will save them. Nice guys rarely need to be saved. Why Women Aren't Attracted To Their Sons
Fixer-Upper: Nice guys don’t usually need to be fixed. Bad boys usually do, so they become a project. Women think if they can “create” the perfect man, he will never leave them. Also, if they’re busy fixing someone else, they don’t have to look at what needs to be fixed in their own lives.
Sperm wars: Women are designed to procreate with the strongest possible genes. Bad boys are sending an unconscious message that they have great genes, so they’re not afraid of losing the woman by misbehaving. Nice guys are sending a message that they don’t think their genes are good enough, so they won’t misbehave.
Fear of intimacy: If a woman is afraid of intimacy, she subconsciously knows she can avoid it with a bad boy, since she can never get close enough to him to have to go there. A nice guy will eventually want a commitment, and that’s scary.
Low self-esteem: We don’t feel comfortable with people who treat us better than we treat ourselves. If you don’t think much of yourself, the bad boy is simply reinforcing your negative belief. A nice guy is treating you in a way you’re not familiar with.
Sex: Women feel a nice guy won’t be good in bed. They sometimes like to be manhandled and think a nice guy won’t be able to take control and get the job done. A bad boy comes across as being able to deliver, even though that may not always be the case. Experts Agree: Cheating Is Not About Sex
Hot: Have you ever seen a bad boy who wasn’t hot? I’m sure there are a few, but they wouldn’t be able to get away with half the stuff they did if they didn’t look so good. Meanwhile, when a woman describes someone as a nice guy, she means, “He’s not hot”.
Charm: Nice guys don’t always know what to say, and are sometimes at a loss for words. Bad boys can be very charming and know exactly what women want to hear. However, they eventually switch over to being selfish. By the time they reveal their true colors, the woman has fallen for them and has a hard time letting go.
Posts: 1365 | Registered: Dec 2010
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I had def a bad boy in the past - my Egyptian ex- fiance - no interest in work only for parties, drinks and drugs. He was def one of the hottest guys I've ever seen in Egypt and so charming and funny. Once I've realized the real him I had already fallen deep deep in love and couldn't get myself out of the relationship. Hence I wanted to help him, make his life better, build a future together with him in England where we moved to. It did not work out, I grew up and wanted more but he wanted to live in his old ways.
Now then I chose a 'nice guy'. A man who was rather a workaholic (well I didn't realize this from the beginning either poor me!) but very dependable, family orientated and caring. No more bulls$it, no more lying, no more living life on a rollercoaster - thanks god I am married to this man and love him now for 13 years and counting.
I would def not go for a bad guy ever again. Too much hassle and trouble..... I prefer life on the safe side.
Okay counseling session is over for today!! Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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