I like this blogger. She's not scared to broach the issues that young Black men and women face in this day and age and I quite enjoy reading her blogs.
The good thing about her writings is that she doesn't seem to hold much back. Which is good. Because it allows a young dude into the mind of young girls and what it is they're thinking. God knows it can be hard to know what women think, what they want or what they think they want.
Here's my breakdown of this wonderful post . It's wonderful because it's real and fresh but I want to point out the fundamental flaws in this young woman's thinking.
quote: Run and look for the closest male friend you have and seek his advice. Warning: If that male friend is interested in you, he’s no good either.
^ She makes a good point here by saying Men give women the best advice on relationships. However, I think she's fundamentally wrong when she says "if it's a male friend that's interested in you, he's no good either". In my opinion, a male friend who understands what goes on in men's minds (i.e all men ARE dogs) is doing you a favour when he reveals this truth to you by letting you know he's only your friend because he has hopes of someday scoring, either a deliberate or opportunistic goal.
quote: When you turn your attention away from men like this, for idiotic reasons like, “He’s too short”, “He’s not as attractive as Sally’s guy”, “He’s not paid enough” etc, you need to remember that your shelf life has a limit.
^ This is that "bad advice" from women creeping in here. Who says women actually have a shelf life? Have you seen how hot Stacey Dash STILL is? I think what affects a woman's prospects of getting her ideal man is whether or not she has children. A woman who has already allowed her womb to be used by another man to bring his seed into the world is going to find it more difficult to get a committed "good" (whatever that is) man on her side. My point is, there is no such thing as shelf life per se but is the product already in use?
quote: Seek a Brad Pitt lookalike, but understand that he will most likely cheat on you when times are hard in your relationship or in his life (and quite possibly with your sister).
*Sighs* Any and every man will cheat on you if the other woman is hot & sexy & offering it to him in a way that minimises conflict and trouble in his life. Most likely, he will cheat on you when times are easy and NOT when times are hard.
quote: you will have to accept that your vagina is the most valuable thing you have to offer a man. So every time you make it available for his exploration, you are giving HIM a gift. Not the other way round.
THIS here is the greatest fallacy in the document and reveals a MAJOR flaw in the thinking of the writer. If your funky hand is the most valuable thing you have to offer a man, what does that say about you or women in general? 'Getting some' is not difficult for most men, and at worst he can pay very cheaply for that which you think is so valuable. There is a certain connection that is not made until a man and woman have coitus and I think some women mistake this connection for a loss of power. The truth is, the nature of a relationship changes when man and woman combine but to think that this is where the value in a woman lies (from the man's pov) is very misguided because, well, it is. A woman gets an extra point for all the other positive things about her, like her intelligence, her ability to actually make the man happy (as opposed to just opening her legs), and her ability to cook and 'clean house'
quote: The magic wand, dear sisters, is our own virtue, the standards we maintain, and the quality of our own lives. By being patient, kind, loving, forgiving, mature, spiritual/religious/ethical, and responsible with our working lives, our friends and family members, and with the man that we love, we earn the right to hold him to those same standards. Whether he has always been an immature dog, is going through a phase, or has just never seen a good enough reason to grow up, a woman has the power to change that. So you see ladies, if your man is a dog, you should view that in part as a personal failure on your side.
Just wrong. I mean, women need to understand that a good man and a bad man are not distinguished by their appetite for women. Men in general WILL the need to sleep with multiple women and that is as likely to change as it is for dogs to stop barking and drooling. It's simply nature's way. Nature's algorithm and unfortunately, you can't rewrite it.
Can I get an Amen.
Posts: 1819 | From: odesco baba | Registered: Feb 2005
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posted
The Male Versus Female separation and distinction is a complete distraction. Both sexes are psychologically flawed, and neither can heal themselves while apart. Hence, the Jewish goal to promote and advance homosexuality, widening and extending the divide.
posted
The vagina is the passage way to a very sacred chamber, THE WOMB, that place is God's Laboratory for all human life, male/female, he/she. Women and men need to come to the understanding on the Sacredness of the Female.
THROUGHOUT THE EARTH the female has and continues to suffer the abuse of men and the abuse of societies that have not clearly understood the extreme importance and tremendous value of the female. In many societies when a female child is born there is great disappointment, and the female is looked down upon as someone so much less than the male, which leads to abuse, the lack of proper care, education, and cultivation of her gifts and talents, and lack of appreciation to Almighty (God) Allah for the gift of women.
The Holy Qur’an teaches us that both male and female have the same essence or come from the essence or being that is Allah, the All Wise God. He has given both male and female complimentary natures which, if acted on properly, help each mate to attain to fulfillment, perfect peace, and full development or perfection.
The disrespect of women is the reason that the earth and the world is in the condition that it is in. There cannot be a new world except that there is a new and better understanding of the female, which will give us (men) a clearer understanding of self and above all, a clearer understanding of Allah (God). In the Bible, Allah (God) declares, “Behold I make all things new.” The Honorable Elijah Muhammad has taught us that we cannot bring in a new world except that we accept a new idea that will give us a new way of thinking, and that new way of thinking based on an idea and word that comes directly from the Supreme Being will give us His Sight. We need to see life, creation and Allah (God) as He sees Himself and sees His creation. If we can begin to perceive reality as Allah (God) perceives it, then, and only then, will we treat Allah (God) and His creatures as they ought to be treated.
It is written in the Holy Qur’an, Surah 2, verse 138, “(We take) Allah’s (God’s) colour, and who is better than Allah at colouring, and we are His worshippers.” Since, it is the light of the sun which gives all things their color, then, we who follow the Light (Truth) sent down by Allah (God) begin to see or perceive reality as Allah (God) perceives it. We take His Colouring, which is His View.
What is Allah’s (God’s) view of the female? She is the manifestation of His attribute of mercy to the world. She is undeserved kindness to us, for, through her we are extended through the generations. It is only through her that we live again, and again, and again. It is only through her that we continue to move toward the true perfection that Allah (God) desires for His creation. She is the cornerstone of the family and therefore is critical in the whole process of nation and world building.
Allah (God) speaks to us saying that, we should reverence the womb that bore us. According to Random House Dictionary, reverence is, “a feeling or attitude of deep respect tinged with awe, veneration; a gesture indicative of deep respect; an obeisance, a bow, or curtsy.”
I repeat, we must reverence the womb that bore us. Since, the womb of our mother is sacred, then, this teaches us that the womb of every female is also sacred, for it is from her womb that all the Scientists, Prophets, Sages, Messengers, Kings, Rulers and Gods have come and will come.
According to Random House Dictionary, sacred is, “devoted to some deity or to some religious purpose; consecrated; entitled to veneration or religious respect by association with divinity or divine things; holy: regarded with reverence; secured against violation, infringement etc; properly immune from violence, interference, etc.” How many women see themselves and their wombs as sacred? If the womb is sacred, then the passageway through which the seed of life enters the womb is also sacred.
In the Bible, St. John, Chapter 10, verse 9, Jesus says, “I am the door: By me if any man enter in, he shall be saved, and shall go in and out, and find pasture.” Jesus is to Allah (God) as the passageway to the womb. Jesus is the Eternal Door to Allah (God). Therefore, as Jesus is sacred so is the passageway to the womb also sacred, because it is the eternal door to the womb.
That which is sacred must be safe and not violated. Women all over the earth, due to an improper view of self, have violated themselves and allowed men and society to violate them.
It is unthinkable that a person of righteous bearing would go into a mosque, synagogue, church, or cloister and profane that which is sacred. Any person who violates the sacredness of the house of Allah (God) is considered uncivilized, savage or a heathen. We know it is improper to violate the sacred house of Allah (God), and, as Muslims we are exhorted by Allah (God) to protect all houses where Allah’s (God’s) name is remembered. How much more sacred is the womb of our mothers and the wombs of our female children and the wombs of the females in our society? How much more protection should be placed on the female? How much more should she and we guard her chastity? How much more should we be taught and encouraged not to violate the sacredness of the channel that leads to the sacred chamber where Allah (God) Himself works with women to bring about the answers or solutions to all human problems?
From this day forward, everyone who reads this article is responsible to act in accord with its truth. We must never mistreat women, abuse women, or beat our wives. We must treat women with the greatest of respect and honor believing that they are sacred. The female, believing that she is sacred, should never allow herself to be violated, disrespected, and dishonored and, must never violate and dishonor herself. If the female will see herself as sacred and, if we, the males, will see our females as sacred, then, perhaps we can reverse criminal tendencies in our children and bring forth from this sacred chamber called womb, children in the image of Allah (God); children made like the Great Prophets, Sages, Kings and Rulers of righteous bearing.
Prophet Muhammad gave us the criterion to judge the best of men. He said, “The best of you is he who is kindest to his mother and his wife.”
THIS CRITERION SHOULD NOT ONLY apply to our mothers and wives, but, to all our female children as we move toward basic nation building through the institution of marriage.
The process of marriage begins first with a natural attraction to some physical characteristics of the male and the female which please each other. This natural attraction then leads to a desire to be closer to that person whom we are attracted to, which leads to communication to get to know each other beyond the physical points of attraction.
Premarital sex is forbidden
Among the righteous, those of high moral values, premarital sex is forbidden. In this world premarital sex is the order of the day and anyone who forbids premarital sex is looked at as archaic, old fashioned, and not thinking in the best interest of the individuals. However, 50percent of all marriages in America end up in divorce. Therefore, we need to take a careful look at the approach to marriage and weigh it by the standard given to us by Allah (God), the Best Knower, through His revelation of the scriptures that are among every people.
Premarital sex is discouraged among the righteous, because it interferes with the pursuit of knowledge of the parties who are attracted to each other or who must determine whether this attraction that has led to communication will give us a sure knowledge that this is the mate that they are willing to devote their entire lives to. Sex is powerful. It is a natural hunger in the male and the female even as the desire for food and water.
This desire for sexual expression, if fulfilled before adequate knowledge of the individuals is gained, clouds the mind and disallows us to make the best judgment that we are capable of making. Sexual expression is so powerful that it can cloud our minds from seeing anything but the pleasure that we derive from sexual expression. Then, the participants do not enter into a marriage contract with a sober mind. When we are drunk from the passion of the fulfillment of pleasure, this impedes our ability to make proper judgment. A drunk driver with faulty judgment can end up being a menace to society. Drunkenness impairs judgment. Therefore, we are asked not to drink and drive. Allah (God) however, demands that we do not drink for in all things good judgment and proper decisions are what bring blessings to our life. We are the sum total of the decisions that we make. Bad decisions lead to the destruction of the life force. Good decisions lead to fulfillment of the aim of life. Most marriages are made on the basis of sex and, therefore, when the sex drive diminishes there is nothing of substance to hold the marriage together, because it was made from a physical, rather than a spiritual desire.
Among the righteous, courtship is chaperoned. This is done to keep the parties who are attracted to each other from entering into premarital sex, which then stops the process of courtship. In the word courtship is the word court. By definition we mean a place where justice is administered and a place where the process of finding the truth which forms the basis of justice and judgment.
When two people are courting they are bringing evidence to either support their intention to be engaged, or evidence that they should look in other directions. This process of finding out as much as we can about each other is necessary in forming good and proper judgment.
The individuals are the jury that must render a decision and the individuals must become the judges that ultimately make the decision that he or she is the right one for me. Cross examination is a part of court procedure, which allows direct testimony to be challenged to see if the persons are telling the truth, for it is only truth that will permit us to make good judgment. The more truth we know about each other, our characteristics, ways, strengths and weaknesses, it is the more right we can be in making a decision if we should become engaged to be married or not.
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Any and every man will cheat on you if the other woman is hot & sexy & offering it to him in a way that minimises conflict and trouble in his life. Most likely, he will cheat on you when times are easy and NOT when times are hard. ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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