After Quasimodo's death, the bishop of the Cathedral of Notre Dame sent word through the streets of Paris that a new bell ringer was needed.
The bishop decided that he would conduct the interviews personally and went up into the belfry to begin the screening process.
After observing several applicants demonstrate their skills, he had decided to call it a day when an armless man approached him and announced that he was there to apply for the bell ringer's job.
The bishop was incredulous. "You have no arms!"
"No matter,"said the man. "Observe!" And he began striking the bells with his face, producing a beautiful melody on the carillon.
The bishop listened in astonishment; convinced he had finally found a replacement for Quasimodo.
But suddenly, rushing forward to strike a bell, the armlessman tripped and plunged headlong out of the belfry window to his death in the street below.
The stunned bishop rushed to his side. When he reached the street, a crowd had gathered around the fallen figure, drawn by the beautiful music they had heard only moments before.
As they silently parted to let the bishop through, one of them asked, "Bishop, who was this man?"
"I don't know his name," the bishop sadly replied,....... "but his face rings a bell"
WAIT! WAIT! There's more.............
The following day, despite the sadness that weighed heavily on His heart due to the unfortunate death of the armless campanologist, the bishop continued his interviews for the bell ringer of Notre Dame.
The first man to approach him said, "Your Excellency, I am the brother of the poor armless wretch that fell to his death from this very belfry yesterday. I pray that you honour his life by allowing me to replace him in this duty."
The bishop agreed to give the man an audition, and, as the armless man's brother stooped, picked up a mallet and struck the bells as beautifully as his brother. But as he finished, he groaned, clutched at his chest, twirled around and died on the spot.
Two monks, hearing the bishop's cries of grief at this second tragedy, rushed up the stairs to his side.
What has happened? Who is this man?" the first monk asked breathlessly. "I don't know his name," sighed the distraught bishop, but..."
( .. . Wait for it . . )
( . . It's worth it . ... .)
"BUT HE'S A DEAD RINGER FOR HIS BROTHER."
------------------ Regards, softouch
Posts: 29 | From: Houston, Texas, USA | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
llllloooolllll!!! They are so bad! But they made me laugh!!! lol...if you get more of those, please,please post them!!
Posts: 293 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
AND when the bishop get tired finding another new bell ringer,,he was thinking and thinking and then decide to chane the melody of the bells into VIBRATION function
Posts: 565 | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by softouch: Not on topic, but...
After Quasimodo's death, the bishop of the Cathedral of Notre Dame sent word through the streets of Paris that a new bell ringer was needed.
The bishop decided that he would conduct the interviews personally and went up into the belfry to begin the screening process.
After observing several applicants demonstrate their skills, he had decided to call it a day when an armless man approached him and announced that he was there to apply for the bell ringer's job.
The bishop was incredulous. "You have no arms!"
"No matter,"said the man. "Observe!" And he began striking the bells with his face, producing a beautiful melody on the carillon.
The bishop listened in astonishment; convinced he had finally found a replacement for Quasimodo.
But suddenly, rushing forward to strike a bell, the armlessman tripped and plunged headlong out of the belfry window to his death in the street below.
The stunned bishop rushed to his side. When he reached the street, a crowd had gathered around the fallen figure, drawn by the beautiful music they had heard only moments before.
As they silently parted to let the bishop through, one of them asked, "Bishop, who was this man?"
"I don't know his name," the bishop sadly replied,....... "but his face rings a bell"
WAIT! WAIT! There's more.............
The following day, despite the sadness that weighed heavily on His heart due to the unfortunate death of the armless campanologist, the bishop continued his interviews for the bell ringer of Notre Dame.
The first man to approach him said, "Your Excellency, I am the brother of the poor armless wretch that fell to his death from this very belfry yesterday. I pray that you honour his life by allowing me to replace him in this duty."
The bishop agreed to give the man an audition, and, as the armless man's brother stooped, picked up a mallet and struck the bells as beautifully as his brother. But as he finished, he groaned, clutched at his chest, twirled around and died on the spot.
Two monks, hearing the bishop's cries of grief at this second tragedy, rushed up the stairs to his side.
What has happened? Who is this man?" the first monk asked breathlessly. "I don't know his name," sighed the distraught bishop, but..."
posted
Absolutely fantastic, I LOL thanks!! I'm copying that and taking up the church tower on Sunday, when we next ring.
Posts: 85 | From: London England | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
What I'd like to hear now is some typical Egyptian jokes - Can anyone help??
Posts: 85 | From: London England | Registered: Mar 2004
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President Bush, Tony Blair a young schoolboy and a Priest were in an aeroplane when it got into difficulty...Unfortunately there were only 3 parachutes...President Bush says "As Leader of the Free World I think I deserve a chute" the others agree and he grabs one and jumps out of the plane...Tony Blair says "Well, I think as Prime Minister of Great Britain I too should have one..." The two left agree and he grabs one and jumps out...The Priest says "Well, my young lad, I'm old and you have your life before you, please, take the last parachute, I will stay here...." The schoolboy says "No, don't worry, we will be okay, there's 2 left" "But, how can that be?" asks the Priest..."Because, ......Bush grabbed my satchel!" ............. Oh well....tried....
[This message has been edited by Linnet (edited 06 April 2004).]
Posts: 85 | From: London England | Registered: Mar 2004
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Latest on a recent survey performed by the United Nations.
Last month a worldwide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was:
Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world.
The survey was a huge failure ....
In Africa they didn't know what 'food' meant. In Eastern Europe they didn't know what 'honest' meant. In Western Europe they didn't know what 'shortage' meant. In Egypt they didn't know what 'opinion' meant. In the Middle East they didn't know what 'solution' meant. In South America they didn't know what 'please' meant. In the USA they didn't know what 'the rest of the world' meant.
After being happily married for 60 years, the couple nominated for "Marital Bliss Award" went for an interview .... They had to interview man and woman separately...
Q: what do you think is the reason you're still happily married after 60 years?
A (Man): well, this goes back to our honeymoon....we were in that scenic place to where you can only get on a horse....on the way up my wife's horse stopped for no reason,,, she slapped him on the butt, he moved moved she said: "well that's a first." After a while it stopped again ,,, again my beloved wife slapped him, he moved she said "that's a second". When the animal stopped for the third time my wife dismounted, shot the horse in the head and said "and THAT was a third"......By that time I was screaming "what the hell have you done, the poor animal, now we'll have to pay for that too? are you nuts?" .... She just looked at me very coolly and said "Well, THAT"S A FIRST".....
posted
Linnet ... thank you … hope your laughter last long.
Rimo ... you reminded me of a very famous proverb that is also an Egyptian advice to newly-wed grooms: "Edba7laha El-otta" which means "slaughter the cat" for your wife. It wants to say that you have to slaughter that sweet little creature at the wedding day for your wife to know how strong you are ... after that she will respect you all life long.
If course, it is only a proverb … hahaha something similar to the horse.
quote:Originally posted by Raymon: Linnet ... thank you … hope your laughter last long.
Rimo ... you reminded me of a very famous proverb that is also an Egyptian advice to newly-wed grooms: "Edba7laha El-otta" which means "slaughter the cat" for your wife. It wants to say that you have to slaughter that sweet little creature at the wedding day for your wife to know how strong you are ... after that she will respect you all life long.
If course, it is only a proverb … hahaha something similar to the horse.
Egyptian here Raymon I'm familiar with that proverb....Still I don't get it, why the cat? we have some funny proverbs don't you think?
[This message has been edited by Rimo (edited 08 April 2004).]
Why cats? Because women love cats a lot ... it is the cutest creature to their hearts, as I believe. Slaughtering a cat would give the impression that the man is too cruel to be show kindness for such cute creature, and hence the lesson to wives has more effect.
Also, some have likened women to cats who are very cute and nice, but can really hurt if you touched her ... "Those who will play with cats must expect to be scratched."
From some Internet sources: Why do women love cats? They're independent, don't listen, don't come when you call them, like to stay out all night, and when they are home they just want to be left alone to sleep. In other words, every quality that women hate in a man, they love in a cat. --------------------------------------- Quote: "Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea." -- Robert Heinlein ----------------------------- Check for that book: The Feline Mystique: On the Mysterious Connection Between Women and Cats at: http://enotalone.com/books/0312316100.html
Why cats? Because women love cats a lot ... it is the cutest creature to their hearts, as I believe. Slaughtering a cat would give the impression that the man is too cruel to be show kindness for such cute creature, and hence the lesson to wives has more effect.
Also, some have likened women to cats who are very cute and nice, but can really hurt if you touched her ... "Those who will play with cats must expect to be scratched."
From some Internet sources: Why do women love cats? They're independent, don't listen, don't come when you call them, like to stay out all night, and when they are home they just want to be left alone to sleep. In other words, every quality that women hate in a man, they love in a cat.
Hey Raymon, Thanks for the detailed reply two more questions here: 1-why this link? I like it btw, did you design that webpage? 2- also I got this joke from therer "When you see a man opening the door of his car to his wife, you must know there is something new: either the wife or the car." what is it with men and their cars? why is it everytime I see a woman about to close the car door or take out her lipstick "in the car" i see a man wince beside her?
posted
Sorry Rimo … I have had to travel outside Egypt and couldn’t follow EgyptSearch for few days. Yes, youregypt.com is my site … “i see a man wince beside her” haha … I think cars for men are like dogs for human beings. I think a man, specially unmarried spouse, would look to his car as a faithful friend, and that it is all what is left for him in this world.
Take that as an example: Q: Why would women be better off if men treated them like cars? A: At least then they would get a little attention every 6 months or 10,000 miles, whichever came first.