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Author Topic: McCartney v McCartney
Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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It's a very sad world we live in when Sir Paul McCartney and his wife are facing divorce and all anyone seems to want to do is make jokes about her false leg. Personally, I think it's prosthetic.

News reports have confirmed that Paul McCartney has separated from his wife Heather Mills-McCartney. Mrs Mills-McCartney is said to be distraught over the split. "He has been my crutch for so long"! She said in an earlier briefing, "I have no idea why this has happened, I'm really stumped"

"She's running around in circles", according to a close friend, "she will need all the support she can get. It's not like its easy to walk out on a relationship like this"

After his break up with Heather, Paul was asked if he would ever consider going down on one knee again. Paul said he would prefer it if we called her Heather.

It is not known whether a pre-nuptial agreement was signed prior to the marriage. Paul McCartney is one of the richest men in the world, and if an agreement has been signed it is believed that she won't have a leg to stand on.

Rumours abound over the split which have suggested that infidelity may have been the cause. "She's terrible" a source stated, "always trying to get her leg over".

Another source has suggested that her battle with alcoholism was the cause. "Macca couldn't handle it anymore" a friend said, "he would get home at night and find her legless"

Many have attributed this to a problem which started with the present that Paul bought her prior to the wedding. He gave her a new prosthetic leg for Christmas but that was just a stocking-filler.

A miner in Africa has an accident and loses a leg. He says to his mate "I'm f---ed, who will want a one legged gold digger?" His mate says "try Paul McCartney"

Finally a poem by Sir Paul McCartney:
I lay upon a grassy bank
My hands were all a quiver
I slowly removed her suspender belt and her leg fell in the river

These jokes are funny but lets spare a thought for Paul please. Now she has left him, he's going to struggle to find another woman who can fill her shoe. [Razz]

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Malicious delight...

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“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.”

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bob the dog
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If I were him I would have told her to hop it long ago!!!!
(Sorry... but I met her once and she was horrible!!!!)

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al-Kahina
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Sorry here, a divorce is a very personal matter.

But if this article above (which is missing a hyperlink, sorry its so dreadful I am having trouble believing that it was printed) is so drenched with puns. Puns on a person's disability.

I can't believe it. There is no way in hell most of the western hemisphere would have lacked the decency to print such a Politically Incorrect article.

How low are so-called journalist/columnists willing to go?

This is completely sick!

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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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It is a joke you stupid cow! Get a life as per my other message. politically correct, my arse, we are so fuckin politically correct in the UK that the people who live in the UK are losing their rights and freedom of speech. Others see the funny side of this, except you. Even disabaled people have a sence of hunour. It is not an article and i will not post a link to my mailbox thank you very much. It was something that was made up by people for a laff. Get it, a laff. I am sure Sir Paul would even see the funny side. Heather Mills deserves all she gets to try and frame a legend like Sir Paul. So **** off Princess L and go and play with your dolls. Divorces like this are not personal when they are celebs, Ms Mills ahve made sure that she gets all the publicity she can, so get your facts right you stupid, stupid cow. Who the **** do you think you are, snotty cow?

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What a mean article and response.

Aduover, are you a woman? [Roll Eyes]

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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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No, i am not! Get bloody life and sense of humour. Go and kiss someones elses arse who is interested.
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quote:
Originally posted by aduover:
It is a joke you stupid cow! Get a life as per my other message. politically correct, my arse, we are so fuckin politically correct in the UK that the people who live in the UK are losing their rights and freedom of speech. Others see the funny side of this, except you. Even disabaled people have a sence of hunour. It is not an article and i will not post a link to my mailbox thank you very much. It was something that was made up by people for a laff. Get it, a laff. I am sure Sir Paul would even see the funny side. Heather Mills deserves all she gets to try and frame a legend like Sir Paul. So **** off Princess L and go and play with your dolls. Divorces like this are not personal when they are celebs, Ms Mills ahve made sure that she gets all the publicity she can, so get your facts right you stupid, stupid cow. Who the **** do you think you are, snotty cow?

Humor is personal, no matter what the subject may be. There is a current tendency to make jokes about well known people. It is the most easy way to get laughers on your side.Because, the people themselves are not available to give suitable reactions back.
In this case you`re making fun about somebody`s unluck and somebody`s handicap. You can think it`s funny, but you can`t expect others to share your opinion and when they don`t, name them stupid cows.
In my opinion the stupid one has tipped the scales about himself.

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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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yeah, whatever, that hurts soo much.....NOT! Get a life and a grip. You dont have to read it if you dont want to but chose to anyway.If you found it that insulting and was that upset about it, you wouldnt have bothered to read it in the first place. It is taking the piss out of Heather Mills and not disabled people, for fucks sake, dont read it if it bugs you that much. Hypocrite. Write to Heather Mills if you are that bothered, Heather Mills Fan Club 12 St Lukes Road Hexham Northumberland NE46 2BB.
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[Smile] Think the one who is pissed off right now, is you, sir! I don`t care about Mr. or Mrs. McCartney, am not English so I guess both are far away from me anyway, but it is about morals en values. Humor is international, and what`s funny in England will be funny in other countries, in general.
And I think you`re making rather a big deal from something totally unimportant. You thought you were funny, but the lady`s don`t like it. What the heck...
Go out and enjoy your English girlfriends, maybe they have to laugh... and your day will be upgraded again.
Why acting difficult if it can be easy...
You`re simply not appreciated... Bad luck, and give it a try somewhere else. Maybe you will be succesfull...

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“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.”

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Automatik
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I am registered disabled - and I thought is was funny. I have a blue badge but I still refer to my parking place as a Crip Slot. Where has our sense of humour gone. If you cannot laugh in adversity then what is the point of it all. When things get tough you just throw yourself in the river instead of bumbling (stumbling) through.

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Everything for me - www.Luxor4me.com

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Ow, Luxorlover, think you made his day!

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“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.”

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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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Umm, who is actually making a big deal here, pot, kettle, black anyone? You and that scary Princess Crappy.

Disabled people still have a sense of humour you know, it is bigots like you that believe because they are disabled they cannot have any humour. Like i said, if you really have a problem, write to her fan club and complain cause i dont really give a shite what you think.

PS, dont you know the difference between wife and girlfriend? Obviously not! Maybe as your a wanker, you dont know the difference. you are really quite boring so please, pissoff and speak to someone who cares.

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yorkshire rose
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Sooo, Princess, you only seem to atract enemies,
Its time to be nice to folk i think

this has turned out to be a battle as usual

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Alison Faragalla

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English is not my first language, that`s why I don`t understand the nasty words... [Smile]

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“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.”

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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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i am not surprised, she is so stuck up. I can be nice but not to tossers who think they are far superior to everyone else, believe it or not i am not agressive to everyone. They seem to think disabled people have no sense of humour as they are well, disabled, and have a problem with anything and everything that they disagree with, they also think others should agree with them. Get what is well deserved i think. I wont lose any sleep over this and all I did was post a 'joke', whether they like it or not, it is a joke. I am really bored with this now. There is alot of double standards here.well, ??? you understood alot of everything else dont you? Maybe people with one day understand that people with disabilities are just like you and me, have the same thoughts and feelings, good and bad.
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al-Kahina
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quote:
Originally posted by Luxorlover:
I am registered disabled - and I thought is was funny. I have a blue badge but I still refer to my parking place as a Crip Slot. Where has our sense of humour gone. If you cannot laugh in adversity then what is the point of it all. When things get tough you just throw yourself in the river instead of bumbling (stumbling) through.

LL, normally I find half of what you say reasonable but this isn't one of those occasions.

You have all your limbs, you might not be able to walk very well and from what i remember its MS you've got.

Now there is a huge difference between a woman in her 60s who has all of her limbs, but has a degenerative disorder and a young woman who has lost a limb.

Now after WW2 there were dances for young soilders to meet up with young ladies. Whats the chance that a soilder with all his limbs verses a soilder who is missing a limb got asked to dance first?

Allied Nations had the same kind of fraternization after WW2 and during the war. Yet States sided disabled vets/soilders who were missing limbs went to these dances while in Europe vets/soilders who were missing limbs didn't attend these dances.

Now I understand why.

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al-Kahina
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quote:
Originally posted by aduover:
It is taking the piss out of Heather Mills and not disabled people, for fucks sake, dont read it if it bugs you that much. Hypocrite. Write to Heather Mills if you are that bothered, Heather Mills Fan Club 12 St Lukes Road Hexham Northumberland NE46 2BB.

If you were after Heather Mills you would've gone after her persona or her actions, not related to her disability.

But you chose the lowest route possible.

The sewer.

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Yes, Aduover, I understood the intentions. What I don`t understand is that you`re making a lot of noise about something that isn`t worth.
Tell me another joke. Maybe I can laugh... [Razz]

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“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.”

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Automatik
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quote:
Originally posted by Princess_Leia:
quote:
Originally posted by Luxorlover:
I am registered disabled - and I thought is was funny. I have a blue badge but I still refer to my parking place as a Crip Slot. Where has our sense of humour gone. If you cannot laugh in adversity then what is the point of it all. When things get tough you just throw yourself in the river instead of bumbling (stumbling) through.

LL, normally I find half of what you say reasonable but this isn't one of those occasions.

You have all your limbs, you might not be able to walk very well and from what i remember its MS you've got.

Now there is a huge difference between a woman in her 60s who has all of her limbs, but has a degenerative disorder and a young woman who has lost a limb.

Now after WW2 there were dances for young soilders to meet up with young ladies. Whats the chance that a soilder with all his limbs verses a soilder who is missing a limb got asked to dance first?

Allied Nations had the same kind of fraternization after WW2 and during the war. Yet States sided disabled vets/soilders who were missing limbs went to these dances while in Europe vets/soilders who were missing limbs didn't attend these dances.

Now I understand why.


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Automatik
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What you have said is true. I do have all my limbs even though they do not work all that well. However, my brother only had one leg after his he lost one completely when it was torn off in an accident just as Heather's was.

All I was trying to say is that in this politically correct society we seem to have lost our sense of humour. Humour is important in all things and I am sure that Heather has made more than a few jokes herself about her condition.

In her autobiography (published in the Times a while back)she wrote that immediately after she lost her leg a nurse told her that she would not be attractive to men any more, she proved them wrong by having sex in her hospital bed with a more than willing male partner.

People without limbs have climbed Everest and accomplished things that many able bodied people would not have a hope of doing. The disabled seldom feel pity for themselves (if so they cannot cope and slip into depression) and they often find the pity that others feel for them to be intolerable.

So, laugh at the jokes - if they are good ones I am sure that Heather would too. I am sorry if this offends but humour is the way that most people cope with adversity.

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al-Kahina
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quote:
Originally posted by Luxorlover:
What you have said is true. I do have all my limbs even though they do not work all that well. However, my brother only had one leg after his he lost one completely when it was torn off in an accident just as Heather's was.

All I was trying to say is that in this politically correct society we seem to have lost our sense of humour. Humour is important in all things and I am sure that Heather has made more than a few jokes herself about her condition.

In her autobiography (published in the Times a while back)she wrote that immediately after she lost her leg a nurse told her that she would not be attractive to men any more, she proved them wrong by having sex in her hospital bed with a more than willing male partner.

People without limbs have climbed Everest and accomplished things that many able bodied people would not have a hope of doing. The disabled seldom feel pity for themselves (if so they cannot cope and slip into depression) and they often find the pity that others feel for them to be intolerable.

So, laugh at the jokes - if they are good ones I am sure that Heather would too. I am sorry if this offends but humour is the way that most people cope with adversity.

So in order to not be Politically Correct one must be insensitive?

I mean seriously when is making fun of a person's disability considered good taste?

I thought Brits were always all about "good taste" and what is proper?

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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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Look Princess, stop bumping your gums and get over yourself.

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Ayisha
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quote:
Originally posted by Luxorlover:
What you have said is true. I do have all my limbs even though they do not work all that well. However, my brother only had one leg after his he lost one completely when it was torn off in an accident just as Heather's was.

All I was trying to say is that in this politically correct society we seem to have lost our sense of humour. Humour is important in all things and I am sure that Heather has made more than a few jokes herself about her condition.

In her autobiography (published in the Times a while back)she wrote that immediately after she lost her leg a nurse told her that she would not be attractive to men any more, she proved them wrong by having sex in her hospital bed with a more than willing male partner.

People without limbs have climbed Everest and accomplished things that many able bodied people would not have a hope of doing. The disabled seldom feel pity for themselves (if so they cannot cope and slip into depression) and they often find the pity that others feel for them to be intolerable.

So, laugh at the jokes - if they are good ones I am sure that Heather would too. I am sorry if this offends but humour is the way that most people cope with adversity.

agree here, the majority of people with some form of disability do still have a sense of humour and good one to Heather for not losing hers!

I know a lady who has lost a leg too, she is one of the most wonderful women I have met with the greatest sense of humour. Her disability has not affected her life or loves, probably DUE to her great sense of humour.

There is a huge difference in laughing AT someone and laughing WITH someone. [Big Grin]

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al-Kahina
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quote:
Originally posted by Ayisha:
quote:
Originally posted by Luxorlover:
What you have said is true. I do have all my limbs even though they do not work all that well. However, my brother only had one leg after his he lost one completely when it was torn off in an accident just as Heather's was.

All I was trying to say is that in this politically correct society we seem to have lost our sense of humour. Humour is important in all things and I am sure that Heather has made more than a few jokes herself about her condition.

In her autobiography (published in the Times a while back)she wrote that immediately after she lost her leg a nurse told her that she would not be attractive to men any more, she proved them wrong by having sex in her hospital bed with a more than willing male partner.

People without limbs have climbed Everest and accomplished things that many able bodied people would not have a hope of doing. The disabled seldom feel pity for themselves (if so they cannot cope and slip into depression) and they often find the pity that others feel for them to be intolerable.

So, laugh at the jokes - if they are good ones I am sure that Heather would too. I am sorry if this offends but humour is the way that most people cope with adversity.

agree here, the majority of people with some form of disability do still have a sense of humour and good one to Heather for not losing hers!

I know a lady who has lost a leg too, she is one of the most wonderful women I have met with the greatest sense of humour. Her disability has not affected her life or loves, probably DUE to her great sense of humour.

There is a huge difference in laughing AT someone and laughing WITH someone. [Big Grin]

Could you possibly find anything in Heather Mills autobiography that mirrors this:
It's a very sad world we live in when Sir Paul McCartney and his wife are facing divorce and all anyone seems to want to do is make jokes about her false leg. Personally, I think it's prosthetic.

News reports have confirmed that Paul McCartney has separated from his wife Heather Mills-McCartney. Mrs Mills-McCartney is said to be distraught over the split. "He has been my crutch for so long"! She said in an earlier briefing, "I have no idea why this has happened, I'm really stumped"

"She's running around in circles", according to a close friend, "she will need all the support she can get. It's not like its easy to walk out on a relationship like this"

After his break up with Heather, Paul was asked if he would ever consider going down on one knee again. Paul said he would prefer it if we called her Heather.

It is not known whether a pre-nuptial agreement was signed prior to the marriage. Paul McCartney is one of the richest men in the world, and if an agreement has been signed it is believed that she won't have a leg to stand on.

Rumours abound over the split which have suggested that infidelity may have been the cause. "She's terrible" a source stated, "always trying to get her leg over".

Another source has suggested that her battle with alcoholism was the cause. "Macca couldn't handle it anymore" a friend said, "he would get home at night and find her legless"

Many have attributed this to a problem which started with the present that Paul bought her prior to the wedding. He gave her a new prosthetic leg for Christmas but that was just a stocking-filler.

A miner in Africa has an accident and loses a leg. He says to his mate "I'm f---ed, who will want a one legged gold digger?" His mate says "try Paul McCartney"

Finally a poem by Sir Paul McCartney:
I lay upon a grassy bank
My hands were all a quiver
I slowly removed her suspender belt and her leg fell in the river

These jokes are funny but lets spare a thought for Paul please. Now she has left him, he's going to struggle to find another woman who can fill her shoe.

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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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totally Ayisha (and may i say what a beautiful name you have, will keep in mind for my unborn daughter). I think we live in a sad, sad world if we think that the disabled are not as worthy as abled bodied to possess a sense of humour, humour is what makes the world go round and keep us sane. It is only the opinionated bigots such as the Princess Snotty that believe disabled people shouldnt be worthy of a laff! I wish she would blow herself up, glad to help even at xmas. I dont even know her but hate her already, i bet she is a huge housebound heffer who uses a PC as her only outlet to outside life. A very bigoted waste of a wank.

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cock

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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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ohh pissoff snotty cow, go and cut and paste someone elses quotes you waste of time. Do you know Heather Mills personally? NO. Do we care what she says in her autobiography, NO. Do we give toss for you, NO. What part are 'you are an areshole' dont you understand.

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al-Kahina
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What pulls at the British female more:

1. Heather Mills is a bitch?

2. Heather Mills married the man most British women have spent their lives sexually fantazing about?


I had heard that Pricella Presley has been terrorized by female fans of Elvis Presley for 1. marrying and having the sole child of Elvis, 2. for breaking Elvis's heart.

Could this be the same ideology?

If Pricella Presley was missing a limb would an American say the same about Pricella as Brits remark about Heather Mills?

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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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God, i cant believe snotty cow actually thinks i care, i have my own family to care about. Just drop dead. She is soooooo boring now.

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cock

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Why would a British guy make so much fuss about another British man's wife? The only logical reason is he wants Paul all for himself..... [Cool]

I am just not used to a guy gossipping like that, it's more a female trait. Attention everyone, nasty he-bi*ch on board! [Big Grin]

Is this considered humor? [Razz]


Hey, did you find a botox doc yet in Sharm?

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Ayisha
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quote:
Originally posted by aduover:
totally Ayisha (and may i say what a beautiful name you have, will keep in mind for my unborn daughter). I think we live in a sad, sad world if we think that the disabled are not as worthy as abled bodied to possess a sense of humour, humour is what makes the world go round and keep us sane. It is only the opinionated bigots such as the Princess Snotty that believe disabled people shouldnt be worthy of a laff! I wish she would blow herself up, glad to help even at xmas. I dont even know her but hate her already, i bet she is a huge housebound heffer who uses a PC as her only outlet to outside life. A very bigoted waste of a wank.

thank you adouver, but you will find our princess doesn't like ANYONE to laugh about anything. She is hurting to everyone else MUST hurt and she will do everything in her royal power to make it so [Big Grin] As you describe her so well i assume you have seen her picture? [Wink]
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al-Kahina
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quote:
Originally posted by aduover:
God, i cant believe snotty cow actually thinks i care, i have my own family to care about. Just drop dead. She is soooooo boring now.

If you are so concerned about your family why post an article about a private British citizen on an egy-board?

Seriously I don't know what this thread has anything to do with Egypt in the first place.

And why do you have to be so nasty? Have you posted a single post under this "aduover" username that hasn't been in a mean insulting manner?

Got another username to post only nice comments?

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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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what pulls Princess snotty more?

1. Her next KFC
2. Her new thruster vibrator
3. A Mars bar

All methinks.

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cock

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Ayisha
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quote:
Originally posted by aduover:
what pulls Princess snotty more?

1. Her next KFC
2. Her new thruster vibrator
3. A Mars bar

All methinks.

apparently its her shower, cant be bothered to search for the post though. [Big Grin]
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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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what another usernamne, like you? Pissoff, your just a snotty jumped up cow who needs a good slap. If you noticed, many of my posts are aimed at YOU! find some other arse to lick.

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al-Kahina
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quote:
Originally posted by Tigerlily:
Why would a British guy make so much fuss about another British man's wife? The only logical reason is he wants Paul all for himself..... [Cool]

I am just not used to a guy gossipping like that, it's more a female trait. Attention everyone, nasty he-bi*ch on board! [Big Grin]

Is this considered humor? [Razz]


Hey, did you find a botox doc yet in Sharm?

how many British guys do botox?

I thought British guys aspired to look aged and dignified.

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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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Ayisha, wouldnt waste a wank on her like i said before let alone your time. I am against violence towards women but god, she would push me to the limits. She is probably a bedridden 40 stoner who hasnt got out of bed for the past 10 years, full of bedsores and pisses and shites herself as she cant even get to the tiolet. I know her type, no friends, no family, no life.

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cock

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quote:
Originally posted by Princess_Leia:

And why do you have to be so nasty?

visions of pots and kettles come to mind here [Roll Eyes] [Roll Eyes]
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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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it is for my wife, slapper! She want Botox, not that she needs it, she is beatiful, slim and has a wonderful sense of humor. Who the **** are you anyway?

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cock

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al-Kahina
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quote:
Originally posted by aduover:
what pulls Princess snotty more?

1. Her next KFC
2. Her new thruster vibrator
3. A Mars bar

All methinks.

Never owned a vibrator, ate KFC a few times in my life (organically raised as a child, vegetarian for most of my twenties only had fast food a few times before I graduated from high school), mars bars I don't think they sell those anymore in the USA besides don't eat candy much.

Try something else. You could berate me on how many apple cakes I eat which I have made 4 times in the last year.

Besides how on earth did you come up with a list like that? What inspired you, whats underneath your bed, or your pillow right now?

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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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I think Princess Snotty is getting back what she dishes out and doesnt like it one bit. Hopefully, she will have a cardiac sometime later today, the only opinion, she wants to hear is her own,why do you feel the need to justify yourself above?
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Amy Johnsons Manky Flappers
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tigerlily, if you bothered to read this thread properly, you will see that it is about having a sense of humour! Princess L is just getting her hair off because nobody agrees with her, apart from the regular brown nosers I am not the one who made all the fuss, i am just simply defending what i said the the 'joke' i posted. I am simply gonna ignore snotty face now as i cant be arsed. She seems to take great pleasure out of arguing with others and being nasty, but just like a spoiled child, she has a tantrum when things dont go her way and others disagree. Whether you agree with this 'joke' or not it entirely up to you, but please, let others who enjoy it have their say and respect that, I respect your point but what i dont respect is a snotty attitude. How many times do i have to say it is a joke? How many times do i have to say abled bodied people are NOT the only ones with humor? How many time do i have to say it is not about Heather Mills personally, i dont know her or care for her either? Anyone who thinks a divorce is private when there is soo many lies printed in the press and most if it leaked from Ms Mills herself? It is about as private as the posts on here. I hope this clears things up now for good.
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To be continued.
Next week in ES:
* How Aduover burns his tongue by eating to hot Christmas-pudding...
* His wife gets mad because he is spending to much time sitting behind a computer, and throws him out...
* Princess Leia didn`t do her good deed for Christmas and decides to show mercy on the poor speechless chap and takes him home ( He can`t answer anyway)...
* While doing dirty (Can`t talk anyway) in the bathroom somebody`s ringing at the doorbell...

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“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.”

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