posted
Hi everybody, i am reading your discusions and i hope you can help me. I had a short relationship with one egyptian - we met on my holiday in Sharm, on my third visit o Egypt i stayed with him in Alex one week and few days in his family in Cairo. Of course he wanted to marry me.. probably orfi not to have problems walking with me on streets but i refused that. His family was very lovely thoug i had a cultural shock for ex. his cousins came to see me and they where greeting me with words marhaba i love you, which was quite unexpected for me... Also he give me money to give them to his older brother, when i refused, saying that is not my money to give it his brother myself he said its our money as we are together and that ist better if i gavit it to his brother. Or he bought a mobil phone for his sister and gave it to me to give it to her for both of us saying i brought it from abroad with me for her... What do you think of that? I was very much confused, did he wanted his family to love me for giving them presents and ¨money?? Thank you Boadicea
Posts: 8 | Registered: Oct 2005
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quote:Originally posted by boadicea: Hi everybody, i am reading your discusions and i hope you can help me. I had a short relationship with one egyptian - we met on my holiday in Sharm, on my third visit o Egypt i stayed with him in Alex one week and few days in his family in Cairo. Of course he wanted to marry me.. probably orfi not to have problems walking with me on streets but i refused that. His family was very lovely thoug i had a cultural shock for ex. his cousins came to see me and they where greeting me with words marhaba i love you, which was quite unexpected for me... Also he give me money to give them to his older brother, when i refused, saying that is not my money to give it his brother myself he said its our money as we are together and that ist better if i gavit it to his brother. Or he bought a mobil phone for his sister and gave it to me to give it to her for both of us saying i brought it from abroad with me for her... What do you think of that? I was very much confused, did he wanted his family to love me for giving them presents and ¨money?? Thank you Boadicea
It is not bad to make the family loves you, by giving presents in the name of both of you,, but regarding the money thing was his brother getting married, was there a special occasion for that money given?
posted
his brother was ill at that moment, he had something with his back and had to stay in bed also he has his wife there and a new born baby.. I did not understand why he gives him money which came from the family business...
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quote:Originally posted by boadicea: his brother was ill at that moment, he had something with his back and had to stay in bed also he has his wife there and a new born baby.. I did not understand why he gives him money which came from the family business...
Well it is for the new born baby, it is an egyptian habit so don't worry and for the presents , by saying from abroad ,to make his family think , that you remember them when you are coming. Just another habit , meaning you are on my mind. He wants you to act as Egyptian
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anyway would i be expected to bring them some more expensive gifts? Such mobil phones or gold? I can not imagine myself bringing such a gift as a mobil phone to someone i never saw before, but for them i seem normal...
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quote:Originally posted by boadicea: anyway would i be expected to bring them some more expensive gifts? Such mobil phones or gold? I can not imagine myself bringing such a gift as a mobil phone to someone i never saw before, but for them i seem normal...
It doesn't need to be expensive;otherwise i call that exploiting Any thing just to say i remember you guys; there are lots of cheap nice things,and if you are visiting frequently,it is not a must
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thanks for your advices after what ive read on this web site i am affraid of egyptian men.... a little But i love egypt so much! I wish i could live there!!!!
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posted
Hi Sam, could u please elaborate on what would be an appropriate gift to say ' i remember u'......thanks
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posted
Hi Boadicea, As u read from the forum,there is much more strange men here in egypt..than ur friend. It is always a good sign,if u get to meet his family. But i dont like the way, how ur friend make it. He is one,who should give money or gift..It is not meaning,that u must proof ur kindnes with gift..
I never bring gift to my family in law. My husband bring usually something small to them,when we come from our trip from europe. Of course if i had money by my own,i could bring sometimes something..because my husband is really lazy to buy anything.. But i'm not working,so my husband is one who make our money..
Anyway, it is nice to bring something small,when u go visit to people, but not nothing expencive,if u are not millioner..
And dont marry so hurry It takes years before u really know,what kind of man he is .. orfi marriage if its just in paper,not go even to court is ok, because we know what is system here.. I dont understand why should foreigner marry so hurry,it is not her religion or culture habit..
I was living with my husband 2years with orfi marriage,then we were ready to make legal married contract.
And living in egypt is not the same than having vacation here.. But if u find nice work and good friends,it can be fun.
But living with egyptian man is other story..Even there is real love between u two, u both need to change a lot. And even u are coming to egypt, and u should respect the culture. It doesnt meen,that u are only one who give up ur old habits..no way..it must be clear to ur husband,that he is married to foreigner not to egyptian..if he want woman like his mother,it will not be foreigner one..
Anyway, good luck. And ask what ever u like, here is many of us, who marry egyptian man,a good man.
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Thank U everybody for your answers and opinions Puppy I am glad to hear that u are happy with your egyptian husbad and i wish i would have such gool luck as well. I love about egypt everything so much! I dont know what happend to me I love the country, people, language, culture, hot climate, listening to readings form Koran... But something is worring me about my boyfriend... i can not explain but i still dont understand why he doesnt want to marry an egyptian woman, that would be so much easier for him! anywhay thanks guys I appreciate your comments so much Posts: 8 | Registered: Oct 2005
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posted
Does he have money? good work? sometimes it is money problem to marry egyptian. with foreigner they dont must pay gold ,flat, wedding.. and they dont must marry girls family some egyptians are looking something different for their lives, sometimes it is ok,sometimes not..it is matter of their personality. Be careful, i hope he could be man of ur dreams. As my own experience, my own husband was not mr perfect..but luckily he is now. Love chanced him. After all difficoulties,our love is coming better on everyday. It is amazing.
Posts: 263 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Dec 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Enigma: Hi Sam, could u please elaborate on what would be an appropriate gift to say ' i remember u'......thanks
That is a hard question cause im not used to be Egyptian I rarely practiced that nice habit, very bad for my bocket
But i would say it depends on whom you wanna say you are on my mind; It can be perfume,watch,some thing for the kids, or whatever you think appropriate for that person
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Puppy, they have a family business, i think if he wanted an egyptian wife he could afford that, at liest i think i dont know how expensive that is. I asked him that of course, he said that egy women become fat and dont care about themselves after marriage and that he wants a western girl... He himselves tryies to be like a western guy, but he has never been abroad, so he tries to be more modern then western people themselves! He is also from a big family he has about 11 sisters and brothers. He said he bought a house with swimming pool in Alex lately... But i dont understand if that is a family house or his own house. He said he has a car, but than the rest of the family would drive it... Its so confusing for me. Puppy where did u meet your husband, in egypt or in your country??
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posted
Hi, I met my husband here in hurghada. But he is not working with tourism.. Anyway, i made mistake,because i moved so soon to egypt..I didnt take time to think, or learn anything from culture ,language and so.. Of course i made right choice, cause it was easier for me to move here than for my husband move TO finland..and we are really madly in love.. But even love is most important thing in my life, i really miss back to my country,and i feel many time so unhappy here,even i have my lovely husband..it is just not enouht for me, i need to have also my "normal life" aroud me ..
Anyway,many foreigner wifes are happy here,good for them..i hate myself,that i dont feel comfortable here, but it is really hard to change my personality,it doesnt fit with this country..
Just warning, men(my own husband including), are really talking much things,that will never really happen.. And small white lies are part of daily life. This is really hard for me..i cant lie..and i hate,if my husband lies to me,even small thing.. I think it is very selffish way to do, if u dont want hurt somebody,u just lie...I like to tell the trueth,even it could hurt and make problem..but i'm enough strong to solve it.
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Puppy thank u very much for your reply... u know in fact i broke up with my bf long time ago.... sometimes i regret it, somethimes i think i made the right decision, espec after what i have read in these forums it was very informative for me. But as you see i still can not forget him and i fall in love not only with him but with the country as well... anyway i keep my fingers crossed for you to be happy in Egypt with your husband whome u love so much and who loves so much You! Egypt is a fascinating country, try anything which would make u happy to be happy bcz i think even u find it a bit difficlut to live there u Love your husband and u want to be with him, so just try to enjoy yourself and be happy in Egypt! I wish u all the best and lot of love and happines. Yours Simona Posts: 8 | Registered: Oct 2005
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posted
Boadicea Thanks. I hope same to u. Sometimes it is just better to try forget the past..and look for the future. I wonder many times, if i was marry finnish man,,,how could be my life now.. When i have very bad day, i wonder,why i marry egyptian man..why i make my life so difficoult.. Love is crazy thing..my hearth is full of it, so my brain are not working
It is much easier to be fall in love with country, believe me..u can come to have a nice holiday, u can have ur dream.. when ur dream come true, it is not dream anymore,and sometimes trueth is not even near the dream..sometimes it luckily is what u was dreaming. u never know, sometimes it is good to take the risk, it can be painful or no..who knows.
posted
Hi to all, this is my first posting but I have been reading this forum for a few months with big interest - different sections and thanks to all members I got realy a lot new informations, found answers to my questions. And this subject also - I found interesting new points and explenations - I also have friends in Egypt and try hard to understand - constantly I am discovering new coultural differecess it makes me sometimes so confused and coused a lot of faiths. Especcialy i like Puppy's (the nick name is due to your love for dogs? :-)) comments I would like to thank you for sharing your personnal experience on this forum. Realy I like your way of writing - it seems to be honest and direct even when you write about very personnal issues (relations etc.) - I just want to say that it made me fill I am not alone with my problems and way of thinking - i mean so "European" way of thinking despite of love to Egypt :-) many thanks and take care Margo
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posted
Hi Margo I'm happy if i helped u feel as a "normal".. That's why i share my personal life here. I dont want that people get over confused with culture,religion and other things..After all,only personalities matter, that marriage/friendship can work or no..
And yes, i love animals..i have 2dogs..other one called as margo
if u want write email for me, my adress is :sekasuhde@yahoo.com
Posts: 263 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Dec 2004
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for ex. his cousins came to see me and they where greeting me with words marhaba i love you, which was quite unexpected for me... Also he give me money to give them to his older brother, when i refused, saying that is not my money to give it his brother myself he said its our money as we are together and that ist better if i gavit it to his brother. Or he bought a mobil phone for his sister and gave it to me to give it to her for both of us saying i brought it from abroad with me for her... What do you think of that? I was very much confused, did he wanted his family to love me for giving them presents and ¨money?? Thank you Boadicea
I rarely practiced that nice habit, very bad for my bocket 
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