Which of the following would you share your life with? I.For gals: 1. Someone who's capable of providing you with everything you want, but who you do not have feelings for? 2. Someone you love but are not sure of his feelings towards you? 3. Someone who really loves you, but can only provide within his capabilities?(Assuming the capabilities can provide you with a very good lifestyle, but not your dream world)
II. For guys: (Much Simpler) 1.Would you marry a girl who loves you or a girl you love? 2. Would you get involved with someone who's from a different social or financial rank than you?
Posts: 67 | From: Cairo | Registered: Sep 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Umslopagas: Question for all unmarried guys/gals II. For guys: (Much Simpler) 1.Would you marry a girl who loves you or a girl you love? 2. Would you get involved with someone who's from a different social or financial rank than you?
1- will be whom i love... after she loves me 2- probably the same or lower regarding financial, same or higher regarding morals\religion
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quote:Originally posted by Umslopagas: Question for all unmarried guys/gals
Which of the following would you share your life with? I.For gals: 1. Someone who's capable of providing you with everything you want, but who you do not have feelings for? 2. Someone you love but are not sure of his feelings towards you? 3. Someone who really loves you, but can only provide within his capabilities?(Assuming the capabilities can provide you with a very good lifestyle, but not your dream world)
Simple,
1) He must provide for me the lifestyle I grew up with, in my father's house. Its an Islamic principle of marriage and its a good marker for future sucess in the marriage. When you are courting and refreshly married it doesn't seem like a big deal, but in time if he can't provide for you at the same level you grew up with it will ruin his self-esteem. And unfortunately infactuation is more likely what you feel until the honeymoon is over. So you know how you feel about someone a good year after you have married them (even in western relationships when you've known someone for several years, people change after they marry).
2) Kinda a foolish question.... You must fit each other by social status, professional status and whether your two families agree on the match. Whether you love them or they love you isn't irrelevant, but its not the deciding factor.
3) Much the same as #1, but in the end you can have a quality of life you are accostumed to and be loved. Why are these questions asking a woman to choose between love and money? They are not exclusively separate!
Posts: 991 | From: My daughter is a stalker | Registered: Jul 2006
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posted
well it depends on one question, do you love #3?? if you do then #3, if you dont then i dont know, probably #2 but that is a risk.... one that i am faced with coincidentally.
posted
Which of the following would you share your life with? I.For gals: 1. Someone who's capable of providing you with everything you want, but who you do not have feelings for? ========================== If he can provide everything I want (and I want pretty much a lot - I deserve the best) I already like him a lot. I tend to like and love generous man.(Generous man is a giver and I like man who loves to give).
If he has it 'all' but he is cheap and can't provide for me, I don't respect him thus I can't love him. Thus there is no way in the world I would marry him.
If I REALLY REALLY REALLY like him and override my standards out of intuition or faith for him I would maybe date him to get to know him better and see if he will get financially more stable, 6 months at max and watch him closely if he is progressing or not (now he has 1 more reason - Me), and if he is still on the same level - I am gone baby. I have no time for losers and Love is just a talk, you got to prove it with acting responsible and being responsible. He must be educated.
2. Someone you love but are not sure of his feelings towards you? =========================== How can this happen? To love someone and not to know if he loves me too? LOL! You are funny. I know if a man loves me or not, but most importantly what matters is - do I like the way he loves me, and #1 (see above). So to answer your questions = NO.
3. Someone who really loves you, but can only provide within his capabilities?(Assuming the capabilities can provide you with a very good lifestyle, but not your dream world) ===========================
Not bad offer, however what do you mean "within his capabilities" which is by the way not my "DREAM WORLD"? I would go for this option "only" if I can't get the option in which a man loves me and can provide me my 'dream world'. I don't like to settle for less, but I would consider, it all depends on how far is this from my dream world. ( By the way thanks for posting such an interesting and thought provoking topic. I liked it. )
Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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posted
What i will gain in a wife or a girl i love her but she dont love me (if she dont love me so there are other reason make her engaged to me so when this reason disapear also she will disapear with her reason ), but in a condition of a girl love me , i would never engage to she if i wasnt love her What is the different between people (is the financial rank ? or the personality?) i saw alots of good personalities in several financial rank so the most important is the personality not the financial rank , the personality drive the future not money (money can goes in a second but personality stay for ever)
Posts: 248 | Registered: Aug 2006
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quote:Originally posted by mark2006: What i will gain in a wife or a girl i love her but she dont love me (if she dont love me so there are other reason make her engaged to me so when this reason disapear also she will disapear with her reason ), but in a condition of a girl love me , i would never engage to she if i wasnt love her What is the different between people (is the financial rank ? or the personality?) i saw alots of good personalities in several financial rank so the most important is the personality not the financial rank , the personality drive the future not money (money can goes in a second but personality stay for ever)
A wise answer from someone who weighs his pros and cons before taking a decision.
Posts: 67 | From: Cairo | Registered: Sep 2006
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posted
The one to marry would be the one that loves you and that you love in return. In a perfect world he would be able to provide anything and everything you want in the material world. But this isnt a perfect world so simply put, it would be the guy that makes you happiest. If money and wealth is all that you need to make you happy you marry that one If love is what makes you happy it doesnt matter what financial status he has, you get a job and help and love each other.
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: The one to marry would be the one that loves you and that you love in return. In a perfect world he would be able to provide anything and everything you want in the material world. But this isnt a perfect world so simply put, it would be the guy that makes you happiest. If money and wealth is all that you need to make you happy you marry that one If love is what makes you happy it doesnt matter what financial status he has, you get a job and help and love each other.
Is a perfect answer! And the last sentence it be for me if I should choose.
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The perfect match never exists, what's important are 3 things:
1. Understanding --> She should be able to understand my life priorities, my interests and my moods, and I should be able to do the same and accommodate for them. 2. Compassion --> Definitely there must be some feelings involved or we'd both turn out to be hurting each other - intentionally or unintentionally - most of the time. 3. Mentality --> They should be mentally complimentary or compatible to each other, or in a while the relation would just either phase out or lose all point in it.
Social status cannot be ammended, if it's radically different, it won't work out. Unlike financial status which is constantly changing.
Please correct me if I'm wrong.
-------------------- When you take something for granted as your own accomplishment. The lord takes it away to show you that all is his making and that you have done nothing to deserve his gift Posts: 67 | From: Cairo | Registered: Sep 2006
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posted
I prefer "mutual love" but that wasn't a choice provided for us men. So I think it is more important for me that she loves me because then it is easier for me to trust her. When I trust someone I can be the best man I can be for them. When I do not trust them I am too worried about protecting myself and thus act more on that than on any other feelings.
Yes, I would be involved with someone from a different social and financial class than I. I have great friends from all social classes so I am not prejudiced in that regard.
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posted
I think you're missing an option for the ladies; take the idea of 'providing' out of the equation & I think it's just more important to find someone that there's a mutual connection with.
-------------------- Disclaimer: My posts are not meant to personally offend anyone. If you find yourself reading my posts repeatedly, you are kindly asked to seek the help of a professional Posts: 483 | From: cairo | Registered: Mar 2006
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quote:Originally posted by cairobug: I think you're missing an option for the ladies; take the idea of 'providing' out of the equation & I think it's just more important to find someone that there's a mutual connection with.
That's very true, I may have misphrased, but let me emphasise a point here, I doubt that with the current "dynamic" culture, anyone has time for feelings, currently we have - in most cases - either romance (as a means of changing the rhythm of life), physical attraction or financial security. Anyone here - honestly - knows of some couple that were married for another reason?
Posts: 67 | From: Cairo | Registered: Sep 2006
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quote:Originally posted by cairobug: I think you're missing an option for the ladies; take the idea of 'providing' out of the equation & I think it's just more important to find someone that there's a mutual connection with.
and if you chose to approach a relationship with an Egyptian guy by taking the idea (social norm) of "providing" from the relationship, then he won't be a man anymore.
And thus why Egyptian men are pitied for marrying foreign women.
Last night, late last night I went out and shopped for 3 weeks worth of food for the both of us. 4, no less than 4 somali taxi drivers slowed down to check out if I needed a taxi ride home with all those groceries. (I used a cart with a cardboard tote, via the light rail transit to get it all home). I came home to a grumpy, downright b*tchy ex-husband who glared at me.
Because I chose to so publically display that I went out on my own to buy groceries, use public transit and on top of it, without him (meaning I paid for it myself) I had shamed him.
Its not my fault those taxi drivers couldn't round up business and not gossip.
Posts: 991 | From: My daughter is a stalker | Registered: Jul 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Albino_Eskimo: Because I chose to so publically display that I went out on my own to buy groceries, use public transit and on top of it, without him (meaning I paid for it myself) I had shamed him.
Its not my fault those taxi drivers couldn't round up business and not gossip.
Very interesting.
Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Umslopagas: I may have misphrased, but let me emphasise a point here, I doubt that with the current "dynamic" culture, anyone has time for feelings, currently we have - in most cases - either romance (as a means of changing the rhythm of life), physical attraction or financial security. Anyone here - honestly - knows of some couple that were married for another reason?
Ums what has happened to your other topic about pain and suffering in Living in Egypt? I can't find it and I wanted to reply and read more...
Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Albino_Eskimo: Because I chose to so publically display that I went out on my own to buy groceries, use public transit and on top of it, without him (meaning I paid for it myself) I had shamed him.
Its not my fault those taxi drivers couldn't round up business and not gossip.
Very interesting.
Especially for a woman who hasn't know a guy to have his own residence or a stable job.
My ex works 80-100 hours a week. And he did live in his own home for a few years before coming to the USA.
Posts: 991 | From: My daughter is a stalker | Registered: Jul 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Umslopagas: I may have misphrased, but let me emphasise a point here, I doubt that with the current "dynamic" culture, anyone has time for feelings, currently we have - in most cases - either romance (as a means of changing the rhythm of life), physical attraction or financial security. Anyone here - honestly - knows of some couple that were married for another reason?
Ums what has happened to your other topic about pain and suffering in Living in Egypt? I can't find it and I wanted to reply and read more...
Wait a minute, what did happen to that thread. It sounds like a familar kind of thread.
Could you fill me in on the details?
Posts: 991 | From: My daughter is a stalker | Registered: Jul 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Umslopagas: I may have misphrased, but let me emphasise a point here, I doubt that with the current "dynamic" culture, anyone has time for feelings, currently we have - in most cases - either romance (as a means of changing the rhythm of life), physical attraction or financial security. Anyone here - honestly - knows of some couple that were married for another reason?
Ums what has happened to your other topic about pain and suffering in Living in Egypt? I can't find it and I wanted to reply and read more...
Wait a minute, what did happen to that thread. It sounds like a familar kind of thread.
Could you fill me in on the details?
For some reason it was moved to the romance section, beats me why that was done
Posts: 67 | From: Cairo | Registered: Sep 2006
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and if you chose to approach a relationship with an Egyptian guy by taking the idea (social norm) of "providing" from the relationship, then he won't be a man anymore.
And thus why Egyptian men are pitied for marrying foreign women.
Last night, late last night I went out and shopped for 3 weeks worth of food for the both of us. 4, no less than 4 somali taxi drivers slowed down to check out if I needed a taxi ride home with all those groceries. (I used a cart with a cardboard tote, via the light rail transit to get it all home). I came home to a grumpy, downright b*tchy ex-husband who glared at me.
Because I chose to so publically display that I went out on my own to buy groceries, use public transit and on top of it, without him (meaning I paid for it myself) I had shamed him.
Its not my fault those taxi drivers couldn't round up business and not gossip. [/QB][/QUOTE] -------------------------------------------- Sorry to hear that, I just have to say maybe I have a different impression on the men--from someone who isn't the norm. I always think men just have these strange issues that women can't understand, just all men in general. I do my own grocery shopping but it's my housekeeper who makes such a big deal about it.
Posts: 483 | From: cairo | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
Question for all unmarried guys/gals i'M SEARCHING FOR MULIM, WEALTHY , POLITE AND PRETTY WOMAN IS GREAT
Posts: 2728 | From: جمهورية مصر العربية | Registered: Sep 2006
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yes, sure. i'm virgin yet will i fast then breafast on an onion هصوم وافطر علي بصلة
Posts: 2728 | From: جمهورية مصر العربية | Registered: Sep 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Albino_Eskimo: My ex works 80-100 hours a week. And he did live in his own home for a few years before coming to the USA.
Albino I have met one guy recently and he has his own residence, drives brand new Mercedes ( black one ) and works as a Cab Driver.
We are friends. We went for lunch 2 times and dinner 1 time. He paid each 3 times. He is supporting his family and wants so desperately to be my boyfriend, fiance, husband eventually.
He already told me that when in relationship he offers all the following: - he works hard and gives everything he can, including his credit card to a lady to shop her clothes since he loves attending family parties - he brings a rose every time on a date, pays for everything all the time, opens the doors like a gentleman, and is loyal and faithful in all means - he wants to have children, is willing to learn and adjust to my culture in all means. - he cooks and have no problem of cooking for me in the future. - he also mentioned his package size is pretty large and he loves giving oral sex for 2 hours he says.
The only thing is, I don't date cab drivers.
In addition with living alone, working and functioning independently, a man who wants to be with me needs to be educated and have good paid and stable job as well.
Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Albino_Eskimo: Especially for a woman who hasn't know a guy to have his own residence or a stable job.
Hasn't know a guy to have his own residence and a stable, good paid job - at the same time. How many do you know that are not married and not considered elderly?
I do expect men to be responsible - and be finacially stable, and there are not many young mature men who fit this criteria.
You probably at one point had a couple of losers yourself, but you can't admit it. Maybe his financial stability wasn't a priority, maybe you did not have high enough standards, maybe it was your age... maybe you were in school, or blindly in love not thinking about realities of life.
So Albino, look around you will see it's not only men I know, it's men you know too. It's men all over. The problem is - who can admit... see?
Not many women would admit the fact they rescued their husband from living with his Mom and Dad, working low paid jobs, and not being able to buy himself a laptop, or to pay for his own education.
I don't need a Momy's Boy or Daddy's boy who gets it all for free, I want a man who has ability to do it on his own and without a help of his "wife", g/friend, fiance or whoever.
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