Just i wanna mention that i'm totally understand the look of most of egyptians to other foreiners specially women,, i believe that we have different cultures than Europ... Most of egyptian men look 2 foreign woman as they r easy hunt for sex.. i agree that of course also some foreign girls help in this look,,anyway it has many reasons i'll not go into it,, i am just talking abt if there is bad egyptians so is it law for all egptians to be bad as well,,, I'm In True Love with some foreigner gurl,,, i really love her and wish that she could b my wife but the problem is that she discovered that Egypt is very danger place to live in,,i agree with some of this,,but sure not all, She is really good but she is afraid from ppl look and believes here,,she will not just put Hegab and try to live here, If anyone Could just show that Egypt its not that bad and that she can live here in safety specially that i am with her,So i'll be greatful, i don wanna lose a girl that really love because of some silly ppl here in my country..............thank u
Posted by karinfarid (Member # 3352) on :
dear Vito,
who would ask the love of our life to wear the Hajab being a non-Muslim in Egypt? In the beginning, everything seems strange and different in Egypt in the eyes of foreigners. What my husband did for a very long time in the beginning of our life in Cairo 1) he always tried to translate and explain everything that was said in front of me by his friends and family, so I would not feel anything 'funny' is being said. Once even he critized my mom in law for making a joke about a bad mother-in-law that included a 'bad'face. As I did not understand any Arabic he critized her (in front of the neighbours - kaman), explained and apologized to me. 3) he never left me alone for fear I may feel lonely and get homesick 4) he tried everything to read my lips for anything I might wish for 5) he did never push me or ask me to behave as if I were Egyptian, or Muslim 6) and we talked, talked, talked
I suggest: ask her to come and stay for a while to get to know the people and the country, she'll be conviced fast that Egypt is certainly not a dangerous place to live in! tell us more about her and her nationality, maybe we can come up with some Forums or sites where foreign ladies can meet each other to exchange information and experiences... or even meet her in person.
All the best and keep us updated,
salaam, Karin
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Really i'm first glad that u have a good person,also i respect what he did for u and i hope to do the same with her... seconde glad for answering me and get me some hope abt my problem, She is russian but really good one..she is 20 lives in Moscow. i knew many other foreigners from many places on earth and really she is good person, Also she came here many times and even she stayed for long time,abt 3 months here in Cairo and some in sharm,she used to study somethin here in universities,,, so she lived here for a while but still afraid specially if she will live forever or atleast for years,, Anyway She will come but the problem is to overcome her fear,,, so would u just tell me how many years u spent here and if u r happy with stay or not?? what r the problems that u might face here? and how u pass it and what is the worst in here? just to help her i have to know what she will face,,so u r good experienced person to ask u... thank u again Karin,,, ur arabic language is cool Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
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[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 23 May 2004).]
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
i think i know her well,,,we've been 2 years knowing each others,, just if u could help with the questions that i asked to Karin in the previous msg,,,i'll be thankful,,, just i wanna know problems that she might face in here in Egypt as well as good things,,,she is watching this forum,and i hope she gets something useful to make her feel little save and not to worry much..... thank u Katrina
Posted by akshar (Member # 1680) on :
You sound a really nice and loving guy and the fact you have made the effort to try and find her reassurance I think shows you as very thoughtful. Normally it is the women that do the research and i think you should tell your girlfriend that I said you are a really responsible man for doing this for her.
I am married to an Egyptian for just over a year now and living here in Egypt. I love it, there are many things I have had to adjust to but my husband has tried to make it as easy for me as possible. Also the rest of his family have taken me to their hearts and I truly appreciate their love and kindness and anything I have had to give up is worth it for this.
I don't wear hijab, i am not a muslim nor has my husband every asked me to. i do dress respectfully but in Western clothes although I do have some lovely galabeyas I sometimes wear.
So far I have found Egypt like coming home, certain things are bad and hurt but this is true in every country and the good foar out weigh the bad.
If you have the loving support of your husband and his family then your life here will be fantastic and I can't recommend it enough.
------------------ Jane Akshar UK Co-owner of www.flatsinluxor.co.uk Appartments and Tours in Luxor
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Akshar, thanx alot for ur words,it means alot to me,,and i hope it means also for her . i totally agree that any place in the world has the good and bad things,,, really here the good things is not little and i think its much more than bad things. I think here ppl atleast live in save,, freedome here has different meaning than european countries,but when u understand it well it will b enough... really u helped me alot showing for my girlf how it is not impossible to live in here,mayb also u helped me to show the same for other girls that want to live here or afraid from love with egyption.. i hope really that we all understand the type of people here in Egypt and how we have different minds and thoughts,as there r some bad ppl who lower the image of Egypt as there r good people who can b trusted, Tell Me Akshar what is ur country? and what things truelly u want here in Egypt but its not existing?i mean what is worth thing here in Egypt?
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
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Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Katrina, Thans alot,i'm not bothering myself or doing effort,,if i am not doing this for the one that i love and want so for who i'll do,, thanx again you have really put very clear points and advices that i should b aware of. Really i would never know this alone.. Abt Hejab i know it would b a shoke and will not put an end for this fear,i do agree with you,,, Just i did something and we had a fight,,,because i wanted to show her something bad but also has some truth abt Some egyption people,,,and i wanted only that i truelly love her and don't want to hide something from her before she move to here,,,,this something was an Email containing a link,,,Its abt Woman Travellers..then she was very very scared..and now i'm trying to relax her some and search for ways to get her trust in country back,,,,please go and visit this link and tell me waht do u think http://www.mytravelguide.com/city-guide/Africa-&-Middle-East/Egypt/Women-travellers Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
i live in Cairo,Mohndseen, And Its not that important for me to wear Hejab.
Posted by akshar (Member # 1680) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vito: Akshar, thanx alot for ur words,it means alot to me,,and i hope it means also for her . i totally agree that any place in the world has the good and bad things,,, really here the good things is not little and i think its much more than bad things. I think here ppl atleast live in save,, freedome here has different meaning than european countries,but when u understand it well it will b enough... really u helped me alot showing for my girlf how it is not impossible to live in here,mayb also u helped me to show the same for other girls that want to live here or afraid from love with egyption.. i hope really that we all understand the type of people here in Egypt and how we have different minds and thoughts,as there r some bad ppl who lower the image of Egypt as there r good people who can b trusted, Tell Me Akshar what is ur country? and what things truelly u want here in Egypt but its not existing?i mean what is worth thing here in Egypt?
What is there about Egypt that I didn't get in the UK. that is a big question.
In the UK it was all rush and hurry and material possessions. You worked long and hard but for what. You crammed your house full of gadgets and ornaments for what. There was never any time. I had a good job, I was an IT consultant and Chairman of my trade association. I appeared on TV and radio. BUT
when I was here I felt like I came home, the warmth and sincerity of the people, the history and culture, the simple life.
Then moving here and becomming part of Mahmoud's family what joy. I swear to God I have more love from my mother in law than from my real mother. A couple of times I have been ill and everyone dropped what they were doing and rushed round to my home to cook and clean and look after my daughter.
They so appreciate me and care about me.
It is so safe here my daughter can walk down the street in complete saftey something she could never do in London. As she goes down she sees a cousin, an uncle relative after relative. Everyone knows her and says hello. She is so happy here.
I think Egypt has the secret that we in the West have lost, family life is the true happiness not a DVD player. I feel more femimine here, more cared for, more appreciated, more relaxed.
Of course I also love the history so that is a big bonus for me.
------------------ Jane Akshar UK Co-owner of www.flatsinluxor.co.uk Appartments and Tours in Luxor
Posted by maadi_guy (Member # 3075) on :
hey I think most of Egyptian men looking for foreigner women not for sex only but for manythings also like their personality, their beauty, their open minds and their independency.. so that believe me I'm an Egyptian man and I mean every word I say, those guys who are looking for foreigner women are teenage.. but adult men looking for foreigner women just for stable and longe tearm life.
Posted by gebo (Member # 3337) on :
Hello Vito,
First of all it’s an unbelievable thing you are doing now for this forum. I hoped that one day someone positive from Egypt will appear here and show another side of the coin. I write because you reminded me a man who I met in Egypt and those stories here were one of the hints which destroyed my internal order and I lost my faith in the person I met. So, it can be sometimes very powerful tool of influencing people’s minds. Of course his behaviour also caused it. Anyway, I believe that if 2 people really love, respect each other, they always find a way to communicate. So do you. So do I. I wish you all the best and I’m sure you will succeed in every field of your life.
All what I know is that we must trust other people. Not be stupid and blind etc. I have a problem with it, but TRUST is a key word.
Words are words but our doings always tell the truth. And you are doing it.
Again, I believe in you and the girl you love. Meeting a person you love and she loves you is happiness. Creating something good with his/ her is our choice, will, and work. If you want good relationship with one another you must stop for a while and talk to them and create your own picture of the world and relationship . I do believe that people can make miracles. We must remember you are 1 world and she is 1 different world. And now you need to create common world out of those 2 - despite all the differences.
By the way, I’m too busy to be here so often, but that’s right that Monica and all people here are great. Very individual and strong personalities who have both sensitivity and sensibility. All the best for both of you! And everybody here! PS The society we live in, create enormous load of negative thoughts. It influence everybody.That’s why it’s so difficult to change it. It takes time. But here is so much sunshine.
Posted by Monica (Member # 2621) on :
It is true that this forum needed/needs, more Egyptian men's respectable views and opinions, on how they treat their girlfriend/ wife to be.
More testimonials of well treated women like those of karin and Akshar are needed to at least IMPROVE, the reputation of our Egyptian men - which is, after all, highly linked to the intelligence of women that befriend them!
It's an insult to the intelligence of an Egyptian woman, when a foreigner questions the decency of her Egyptian/fiancé/ husband.
Thanks for your good words gebo, take care
Monica Vito: thanks
QUOTE]Originally posted by gebo: Hello Vito,
First of all it’s an unbelievable thing you are doing now for this forum. I hoped that one day someone positive from Egypt will appear here and show another side of the coin.
By the way, I’m too busy to be here so often, but that’s right that Monica and all people here are great. Very individual and strong personalities who have both sensitivity and sensibility. All the best for both of you! And everybody here! PS The society we live in, create enormous load of negative thoughts. It influence everybody.That’s why it’s so difficult to change it. It takes time. But here is so much sunshine.
[/QUOTE]
[This message has been edited by Monica (edited 13 March 2004).]
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Thanks alot Gebo i really did what i had to do and i think i am not the only person who would do this,,,alot of people really like to show some abt the positive and negative sides of our country and thoughts,,,, maybe the have no chance to participate in here,,but i'm sure that there is,,, I really think that the best thing to face ur problems not to run away from it,,, once i wrote this topic,,,i thought that i'll be attacked by others and will just sit trying to show them the truth,,,but what happened that i met alot of people who supported me and helped me in my problem.... Aakshar, U showed alot about the beautiful of Egypt families relation,,,,really here its amazing,when u r in trouble u will find many to help even if they don know u,,,people here love each others "in most cases " and they care abt eachothers,,,,i think in ur country the word "neighborhood" has different meaning here in Egypt,,, Thank u alot Akshar and thanx for all Mahmoud's Family,, and welcome in ur home Egypt Monica u r cool,,,, thanx i think we will tank each others alot... At last i wanna opinion abt the link that i put in perivious reply for Katrina
Posted by gebo (Member # 3337) on :
If you, Vito, we’ll not follow false ways, you will succeed. All the afford you do makes you more conscious what you really want in this life.…There are many people but there is only one person who we can make special and to whom we can be devoted truly… I hope I’m clear. It’s not brainwash, hopefully.
This is a Vito’s profile but ... Monica, you attract my attention - too. The most funny thing is that our name has something in common…I know you’ve got much more interest and experience with Egypt in general.
Anyway, Monica, I care of you, don’t take too much on your back! So do I. You are like the sunshine and you are very clever. Have you seen “Passion” by Mel Gibson? It’s so universal. This forum for me attracts very miraculous people. All the best
Posted by gebo (Member # 3337) on :
Vito, You see, this is one of the questions for me: why people who do something good expect punishment? You are involved into relationship with your heart and so far as you not use or “own” another person everything is all right. Well, this seems to be an international side so you’ll get a universal outlook. This side, for me, also attract sensitive people like never I experienced before. Those people here said many wise things and all what must be underlined again is that’s o far as you are with your girlfriend she will not experience any hardship. Never. Because she is with you and you protect her, It’s very powerful. So far as you are clean. My God.Stay like that.
Have a nice day
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Gebo, I really appreciate your words and i just wanna thank u,, People here r helping alot,atleast they get what i feel. They give me alot of advices and hints that i might not be able to discover or to act.. i do some but not all,i knew some but not all,, But really i feel now like i have everything clear in my mind and i have a certain aim to point to,,i feel that i am very close to success in relation with my girl,,,i am really still young and i lack the experience.i met here experienced people and they told me alot and i hope just that all go in the right direction. I hope i can unify the different worlds that we live in and i'll try to destroy all barriers between us, Hope to know more abt u Gebo,,if u wouldn't mind,i mean what do u think abt Egypt and egyptias. what is ur nationality? and how u get to this forums
Posted by gebo (Member # 3337) on :
Vito, I'm very happy I helped you a bit.
Egyptian are good people but I feel that money from tourist was priority in tourists places.I will write more about them later, however I will not write more about myself on the forum - it's not my intention to be know in the public. Maybe there are other sources of communication? Why am I here? Becuase I dreamt to see Egypt from my childhood, I saved money to go there, unexpectfully I met a man, he hurt me and I looked for explanation of this culture. take care
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Gebo, i'm so sorry for u,, About money, In all over the world and tourism city is built on tourisits money and all people working in this city has to search for ways to get moneys out of tourists,,its not bad its the way all the world businesses go,,but when it happens very much and with an illegal ways,so its really too bad,,,and untill now we don have this here,,maybe we have those in cities like hurghada or sharm,,,but in Cairo its not like this because its not a tourism cities,,,,Anyway as i told in first msgs,,,,as there r bad people as there r more good people on the other side,,,,it's not a majority here..... i knew u r from Germany,,,,, sorry again for u
Posted by akshar (Member # 1680) on :
Vito i appreciate your thanks and i am glad to have helped you. I have meet a few decent gentleman from Egypt on the internet and you are another. I wish you the very best in your life.
i think Egyptians are sometimes brainwashed by the media into believing what they have here is second best or not good enough and this is so far from the truth.
You have a great country with many years of history and culture. Your warmth and generosity are amazing. You have some of the most amazing scenary the lush Nile valley, the stark deserts, the crystal Red sea. And yet so many yearn for what the West has to offer.
Honestly in my opinion the West has nothing to offer.
Today I went out and my daughter hadn't returned home. I left her a note saying i had gone to a lecture. The entire evening i did not even think about her. I wasn't worried or concerned. She left the house at 3 and I returned at 9:30. When I came home she was outside our flats with my mother and father in law drinking tea and chatting in Arabic. she hadn't even seen the note but knew where I had gone because my father in law said I went with a notebook so she remembered the lecture. The lecture was amazing and so enjoyable. Now where else could i have done that, no where in the West could I have gone out having no idea where my daughter was or leaving her alone in our flat.
------------------ Jane Akshar UK Co-owner of www.flatsinluxor.co.uk Appartments and Tours in Luxor
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Akshar, U have mentioned very good point that Egypt is characterized with,you were true when u said it is very save when u go out here in Egypt,,really its save even in the very late times,, i think this is good thing that exists in Egypt and egyptians themselves don't feel it much,,they just got used to it, Thanx again for ur participating and what you have said abt me,,, just Gebo said that Egyptians' priority is money specially in tourisits places,,,,so what do u think abt this???
[This message has been edited by Vito (edited 13 March 2004).]
Posted by gebo (Member # 3337) on :
Vito, I'm not from Germany, Russia etc.I just don't want to be "well known".
My story just happened. Don't feel sory.I just draw the right conclusion and I wrote you about it before. Nothing hapen without reason.
take care
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Gebo, Sorry i just didn't mean really,,,anyway i don care from where r u from,i care only abt the u r a good person,, And i hope really that u just learned something but not hurt in ur past relationship,,,,
Posted by gebo (Member # 3337) on :
Vito,
Of course, I’ve experienced and I still do - many beautiful moments and know some wonderful people. Otherwise I wouldn’t bother about anybody around me and do not write any messages. If people help you, you help them. Perhaps I’m not so “socialized” but the more experience I get the more open and sensitive for people around me I’m. Wish you the same. You know I want a man who will be with me for me, for love and have similar values not just a “somebody –husband”. Perhaps I’m also not – standard like in my mind. Sometimes it takes time. Education is also important for me, but it also cost some efforts.
PS The men I met in your country, will stay in my heart, doesn’t matter if we are together or not. Sometimes distance isn’t good for love. You are also really a good man. I so your profile.It’s great you want to explore the reality and understand it.
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Gebo, Thanks for ur Amazing music,i like it very much and i like this kind of music alot,i just if u have another interests and if u play other than singing,, also thanks for looking at my profile,hope u like it, U R totally right abt finding ur person,,its really true things that should be existed in a man or even a gurl,,,hope u really have a happy life with the one that u like... now i just new what is the similarity between u and Monica,, Hope we could be friends.... C ya
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
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[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 16 March 2004).]
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Posted by _ (Member # 3567) on :
No, Katrina, this wasn't very smart right now. You actually say that people in the Southern States - in more rural areas - are less educated. What do you mean in specific -not the "blacks", do you (as this is the area of the most population of black Americans in the United States????
As I am currently living in Alabama - one neighbor of Mississippi - I can't say that they are less educated. Yes there are people with more and less education but you find them anywhere, even in NYC.
I also can not agree with you on the term that people in rural areas more interested in seeing new faces. This is here definitely not the case. People like to stay by themselves, they are not interested where you coming from (and I am coming from Europe) and need a long time to warm up.
Not so in Egypt: People actually coming running towards you and bombarding you with questions and invitations.
By the way: To which other countries have you traveled?
By the way, of course in NYC no one looks at each other and its not because of time, no because its just simply that all Americans are more or less foreigners in their own country. You have all different-looking people in one place. The father or the grandmother came from Europe, Asia, Africa etc. Americans like to forget this sometimes....
[This message has been edited by Tigerlily (edited 16 March 2004).]
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
Lilly,
I did not mean blacks at all.. But for the sake of people interpreting it differently from what I meant, I deleted it.
I simply commented on the article Vito posted not what it is like in Egypt. As i can tell from other posts, it is not like that and that's why I said I think it is overrated.
Also, as far as NYC not looking at each other... as you can see it was a joke...
[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 16 March 2004).]
[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 16 March 2004).]
[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 16 March 2004).]
Posted by _ (Member # 3567) on :
Well I replied to your comments ..... and I am still wondering.....
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
quote:Originally posted by Tigerlily:
Well I replied to your comments ..... and I am still wondering.....
I have not time for haivng people twisting what I did and did not imply.
Posted by _ (Member # 3567) on :
Katrina, thanks for your reply. But I can see that you sent out comments of racial prejudice. Well you don't need to go into further details here.
Hopefully you don't feel the same about Egyptian people when you are coming to visit them one day .....
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Hey guys, its more simple than this,,,Katrina was only giving an opinion on the link.. Anyway thanks for both of u,,, i've read ur post Katrina before its gone I'll not interfer in ur country issues now,i'll just talk abt my country now., I believe that most of tourists that visit egypt go to historical places and somehow its all in a low class areas,,,,there most of people have low level of education and living conditions,,,sadly most of them also have the wrong idea about foreigners females and u know the rest from the topis,,,its true,, but also they r so friendly people and they all the time want to show their welcome to foreigners but sadly in a wrong way,,, Middle and high class people really aware of and respect the idea of the different cultures, believes, customs and attitudes between them and foreigners,,, we live in a country that has a mixed kinds of people and minds and thoughts,,,, About the money issues,,,in all tourism countries and cities people depend only on foreigners to get their interests from them,,,its a job that exisits in all over the world,,,but the problem when it becomes too over,,that people get annoyed and hate themselfes,,,it happens really only from a very little people and most probably in tourism places.. Also i am sure that we all believe that all countries and places have some bad sides and other good sides,,,so i hope that we always look to the good side of Egypt and compare it with the bad one to find out that its a reall good country and very save place people can live or visit,,,,,thanx again for all of u.
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 16 March 2004).]
[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 16 March 2004).]
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
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Posted by _ (Member # 3567) on :
Well, Katrina, how come if you didn't offend anyone with your post WHY did you delete it then????
Before you go and visit other countries you should make sure you treat everyone in your country with the same respect you want to get treated.
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Tigerlily, You were right when you said that no one can judge a country or a place without living there,,,i really do agree, i've seen What Katrina wrote and really didn't feel any about racism, also by deleting her post i became more sure that she doesn't mean any of this,,,she erased it because if u saw some racism in it so maybe other people would see it too,,,so she has to delete it,,,if she believe in it ,,she would never do,,,, Feel free Katrina to send me,, thank u all
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
Vito, thank you so much! You are not only a sweet but quite an intelligent guy! Thank you for your support.
First, the intent of is was to help Vito understand what a person who did not grow up in Egyptian culture may view perceptions described in the artcile he attached. Perhaps the one he loves may relate to that and he could understand it better himself. This whole post is to help Vito to grow in his relationship and overcome difficulties growing it and have a happy end, not any other issues. So if smth may lead to such discussion, it defeats the purpose.
Secondly, in general in life, I do not to pick up fights that are not worth fighting. There are millions of other great things to do, different topics to talk about. If I see someone who forms a view, makes a conclusion by taking smth out of the context and its intended purpose, I just do not fight about it.
Moreover, I wanted to help Vito. Vito, you read it. So mission is accomplished right?
Love to all, kat
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Its accomplished successfully. I hope that i was not a reason for any fights,anyway i have also no time for fights,i respect tigerlily alot but just i wanted to show the importance of your help to me,and that u didn't mean any if Tiger thinks,,, So thanx again for your help and thanx for calling me intelligent, Tigerlily, why don't just you help and give me your opinion in this? i'll be very glad if i hear your point of view.. Thanks
Posted by _ (Member # 3567) on :
Actually I didn't read through all the postings ..... and when I saw Katrina's it just blew me. It's amazing that someone can think like that and bring it up to a forum. If she would have posted her opinion on an American board - she would have not gotten away with it that easily. And I really don't care if she's changing a line or erasing her whole wordening.
But to understand the difficulty between White and Black inside the United States - and in many areas rascism is hidden and they do not prefer even to live in the same neighborhoods - you really have to experience yourself.
But anyway this is a board about Egypt so lets keep it like that.
Have a good day!
[This message has been edited by Tigerlily (edited 18 March 2004).]
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Tigerlily, Thanks for your reply, this conflict exisits not only on the USA,but what i can tell you trully is that here we don have this problem at all, But also there is some kind of morale barriers between black and whites that can't be gone easily, Anyway if u really have something to say abt this,u can just tell,but please try not to attack a person for some words that i'm sure that she didn't mean,,, Thanks tigerLily,,, have a good day too
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vito: Its accomplished successfully. I hope that i was not a reason for any fights,anyway i have also no time for fights,i respect tigerlily alot but just i wanted to show the importance of your help to me,and that u didn't mean any if Tiger thinks,,, So thanx again for your help and thanx for calling me intelligent, Tigerlily, why don't just you help and give me your opinion in this? i'll be very glad if i hear your point of view.. Thanks
Vito,
You are the sweetest. Do not worry. You did not start any fights. Actually thanks for the article. It was interesting. I learned some Arabic words
I just read your other post. Don't worry. You are so sweet and you are right. Do not try to persuade. But it is very sweet of you, really. We are here to help you if you have any questions. Remember that
We want you to have a happy end love story
Katy
[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 18 March 2004).]
[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 18 March 2004).]
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Ok now i'll cry from Hapiness Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vito: Ok now i'll cry from Hapiness
WOW, Awesome. What is happening?
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
no nothing really,,,just kidding,, Its only great wht u said,,,, i'll never take a step back when i wanna ask u,,,,just wait for my question soon,,, thanx Katy
Posted by sonomod (Member # 3864) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vito: Just i wanna mention that i'm totally understand the look of most of egyptians to other foreiners specially women,, i believe that we have different cultures than Europ... Most of egyptian men look 2 foreign woman as they r easy hunt for sex.. i agree that of course also some foreign girls help in this look,,anyway it has many reasons i'll not go into it,, i am just talking abt if there is bad egyptians so is it law for all egptians to be bad as well,,, I'm In True Love with some foreigner gurl,,, i really love her and wish that she could b my wife but the problem is that she discovered that Egypt is very danger place to live in,,i agree with some of this,,but sure not all, She is really good but she is afraid from ppl look and believes here,,she will not just put Hegab and try to live here, If anyone Could just show that Egypt its not that bad and that she can live here in safety specially that i am with her,So i'll be greatful, i don wanna lose a girl that really love because of some silly ppl here in my country..............thank u
Well you're one of the silly ppl, if she doesn't want to wear a head scarf, she won't. Don't even try to pursuade her to. Understand what the Quran says about coersion, bullying her to cover her head is coersion.
Remember if these foreign women are giving out sex freely, remember THE MISR MEN ARE GIVING IT OUT FREELY TOO!!! Don't place the blame squarely on the woman, it takes a man and a woman to get it on. Take a look at that woman in Nigeria (Nawal) who had a baby out of wedlock. They are waiting to stone her as soon as her baby is weaned. She says it's her ex-husband's baby. Are they testing the paternity? Is a man going to be stoned as well? NO!!! this is why people don't appreciate Islam and find it degrading to women. Islam is not degrading to women, the pre-Islamic cultures that refuse to properly practice the Shria are the ones to blame. So don't go blaming the western woman, if you won't hold the Arab man accountable as well.
And trying to force her to live in Misr won't work either. I am moving to Misr out of my own will. He doesn't want me to go but I will. The Arab culture is crushing to the western woman. And if you haven't lived in western for at least 5 years and have tried to make American friends while living there you won't ever know how to relate to her.
For her sake and yours, give up, let her go, most of these relationships don't work.
I would know. It's a stiffling prison to married to an Arab (christian or muslim). I am far more used to patriarchial cultures and a loss of personal freedoms than most Western women.
------------------ Amy the Loud Norge-American
[This message has been edited by sonomod (edited 22 March 2004).]
Posted by sonomod (Member # 3864) on :
quote:Originally posted by katrina: Vito,
comment about wearing "Hajab". This would be quite a culture shock for a foreign woman in general and for a Russian woman as well. I know quite a few Russian women and Eastern Europeans as well. Many women there are very feminine and they take very good care of their appearance. It is not considered as lack of modesty.They dress smarter than majority of American women.
Watch it Katrina!! Where is the moderator here? I have seen alot of skin on my fellow students who are Russian in college. I don't consider their dress exactly smarter. Liz Claiborne, Talbots, and Anne Klein would be a shock factor for their mode of dress. Don't get me wrong many American's dress sloppy. But with amazing amount of expendable income and more American women in the high ranks of Management in American corporatation versus Russian women in Russian corporations, you can't really judge us without sounding childish. Besides I hear many Russian classmates speak of trying to meet a rich man to take care of her and not wanting to build a career. If I American woman said this in college, she would lose friends and men wouldn't speak to her anymore.
quote: I can not speak for Egyptian women as I have never been to Egypt, only saw Cairo, Luxor, Alexandria, and more on TV.
Russians are mostly Orthodox Christians. Out of respect and modesty to God and religion, Russian (or Orthodox Christians in general, copts probably do that, right?) women do cover heads with scarfs when visiting church, unlike people in other Christian denominations. I bet she would agree with that, but wearing the thing in public... Women in general dress smartly not to seduce or whatever, we want to look beautiful for ourselves!
Where do you live and why it is important to you that she would wear this Hajab?
[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 12 March 2004).]
And as an American in Minnesota we dress beautifully for ourselves as well. I grew up in a upscale suburb and have a medical administrator for a mother. At 14 if I left the house to go somewhere in public she'd made sure my clothes matched, pressed, shoes polished, earings and a subtle amount of makeup and lipstick. As well as no hair out of place. No not the debutant look or a OC look, but I did look presentable. Jean and sneakers for occasional school use only.
For a woman or young lady to look appriopriate it enables her to prepare for a successfull life professionally, socially, and progressively.
When I was in Egyt last summer the village women who worked outside of the home in professional jobs looked the best, but always with a head scarf.
Scared me stiff to see so many women in their 50's not dressing to the 9's. Women here in Minnesota dress the best in their life in their 50's. Again expendable income and professional success. I saw nothing but black head dressings down to their knees! Major shock.
[This message has been edited by sonomod (edited 22 March 2004).]
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
delete
[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 23 May 2004).]
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
sonomod, It would be better to understand first then to start insulting people,i really don have time to write chunk of words to defend myself, just if u have time,try to use it in reading again and try to understand anything.u seem like u r fighting with yourself without any reasons. thanks,
Posted by kay in love (Member # 3444) on :
ok....... to sonomod i dont usualy get mad but right now i am totaly pissed off. - you come to this forum - make sweeping statements such as "It's a stiffling prison to married to an Arab (christian or muslim)." threaten people "Watch it Katrina!! " your posts seem to be filled with venom and discontent - all we hear is how wonderful minnesota is and how bad egypt is and how perfect you are! let me tell you something - the people here have shown me nothing but kindness and help - there are many examples of very happy marrages between arabs and non arabs (i also know of several in the uk) so your description of a stiffeling prison holds no water here. HOW DARE YOU say to anyone "For her sake and yours, give up, let her go, most of these relationships don't work. " how the hell would you know that - vito is not trying to force her to live anywhere - he is just trying to help the woman he loves understand his country, and in a very good way too. the way you speak about the us would put many people off going there which would be a great shame please know folks that there are many great people in the states - not everyone is a bigoted bully like sonomod (i did live stateside for a few years before you say anything) we all tend to speak from personal experience here so if you hate egypt i sugest you stay away and if you are in a "stiffling prison to married to an Arab" i sugest you get out of it - you never know if you listend to some one else for a moment he might feel the same about you.
vito my friend DONT GIVE UP until you want to........if you are half the man you show yourself to be then i think you will win.
as i said i dont often get mad - i am not going to say sorry for what i have written - i mean it
much love as always to my es friends around the word kay
Posted by karinfarid (Member # 3352) on :
hello vito,
I'm sorry I did not catch up with the thread the last few days, but I see the girls (Katrina, Kay, Monica, Tigerlily..) gave you all their support and encouragement you'll need inshaAllah.
I've been living in Cairo for 9 years and I have never regretted leaving Austria for my husband and Islam.
The biggest problem I had in the beginning was the language.. it is so frustrating if you don't understand anything being said around you, would have made me feel lonely, if my husband was not there always by my side translating and explaining.
What I did appriciate and still do above all, that there are no secrets between us. It is common in Egypt that spouses don't tell their partner a little secret concerning their family, so a few years down the line they won't hear from their partner, that 'you are just like your mother, uncle, brother...'. My husband told me a very well hidden secret about his father, for this he earned a lesson from his uncle - how could he tell me something like this? Even my mom-in-law had to gasp when she knew that I knew (they've been divorced anyway for many years).
Something funny, when we decided to get married, my husband's uncle run an investigation on me.. his position allowed him to, to see if I was not a Jewish spy after all. My mil took it easy, she said it would show over the time, if I want to stay only for the good weather or if I'm really in love with him...
I managed to learn Arabic over the time and Allah opened my heart towards Islam, so 1 1/2 years after my marriage I converted to Islam, and shortly after I dediced to wear the hajab alhamdulillah.
I think your fiancee is scared a little from all the stares and looks, that is something one has to get used to. Make sure with her, that if anybody says anything to her that causes a confusion or doubt about that person, to tell you, so you could clarify immediately. Be sure about your friends and their intentions.
What I had to learn is how to keep the distance to people I did not know that well, without being impolite, or what I thought was impolite. I found out the best way to answer many question you don't want to spend ages to answer, or that is simply not this persons' business, is with: alhamdulillah (thanks to Allah), and inshaAllah (if Allah wills).
Keep us updated and let us know any news from you inshaAllah,
salam, Karin
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vito: sonomod, It would be better to understand first then to start insulting people,i really don have time to write chunk of words to defend myself, just if u have time,try to use it in reading again and try to understand anything.u seem like u r fighting with yourself without any reasons. thanks,
Vito, sweetheart, do not worry. there will be plenty of moments like this in life. Who cares? it is just one pinion based on her own experience, remember that. remember the limitations of the advice offered. You just learn how to shake it off! smile and walk tall!
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Kay, Thanks alot for ur support,i really just shocked of what sonomod is doing, i could accept any criticism but if its has meaning or even related to what i said,but the problem that i opened the thread to see someone doesn't understand me at all and just insulting me,,,,,if i wanna force my gurl to stay here i would never be here now writing for u or the forum,,Thanks alot for your support, Krainfarid, I really miss your posts,,,i understand the problem of language,but i hope that u now get through.. please keep in touch. Katrina, I am not destroyed or depressed,i m just shocked,,,don worry abt me,,i believe in what i'm doing,,thanx Katy sonomod, U can find job easily,,try to get some other certificates in Cisco or oracle,,it will help alot in the egyptian market,,if u r interested i can help u. All guys in here, I have a big trouble now with my gurl,our relation is very strong even through distance but missing eachothers killing us,,,even if we don show this,but we feel strength of being away from eachothers like this,,i'm scared that this missing could affect our relation,,.. She is so sad that she wants me and doesn't find me beside her,i mean sometimes its not enough only to call her or message her,sometimes its a must to see me and feel that she is not lonely,,,i pass the same feelings,,, we just became more nervous,more jealous sometimes,,alot of pressures,,, i don know what to do to overcome this,Gebo helped me some in this,Gebo is a great person by the way,thanks for her. Thank u all
Posted by _ (Member # 3567) on :
Gosh, what a long thread and actually I did not read indepth .... but some thoughts for Vito:
Vito, your girlfriend is quite young, 20, from Russia, you said? Was this the first time she went abroad to another country, experienced another culture?
No doubt about that you both love each other very much. But the problems I see - you mentioned before - is that she is afraid to live in Egypt. What is she afraid about in specific?
You know you can't force her for anything because this would not be right. She has to come with her own will ..... otherwise - if she will not be happy living in Egypt - she will let you know this all the time. And you don't want an unhappy wife around you, right? Believe me its tough for anyone to move to a totally different county with another culture - some people never adjust.
I believe you should meet once more, maybe she can arrange to come for another three months to visit, experience more the culture, you have to explain to her many more things and you are able to find out whats moving her mind and why she is so resistant.
And please if she decides against you and doesn't get married to you and move to Egypt, don't feel bad about her. You both still have a chance to be together but maybe not in Egypt.
[This message has been edited by Tigerlily (edited 23 March 2004).]
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
delete
[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 23 May 2004).]
Posted by sonomod (Member # 3864) on :
quote:Originally posted by katrina: Vito, sweetheart, do not worry. there will be plenty of moments like this in life. Who cares? it is just one pinion based on her own experience, remember that. remember the limitations of the advice offered. You just learn how to shake it off! smile and walk tall!
That right not allowed to defend myself.
Yet that is so unnatural for me. I have a soul.
People misinformations reaffirms my worst fears of the young generation in Egypt.
And reaffirms my distrust in Europeans.
Why do American youths seem to have such old souls?
I'll stick around the older generation and avoid the young haters who are pro-Taliban.
Posted by homesick2 (Member # 3093) on :
quote:Originally posted by sonomod: are pro-Taliban.
Getting loony again are we!!!!!!
Posted by sonomod (Member # 3864) on :
quote:Originally posted by homesick2: Getting loony again are we!!!!!!
You's sound so much like some of the young people I met that thought the Taliban was the true Islamic socieity. And that if they tried to recreate a true Islamic society like the Taliban it would rid Misr of all evil American influences. This to my face, my first time in Misr.
Yah, they sounded like haters.
An older person about 70 came up to me in the street and apologized for 911 (which he didn't need to) and told be to be aware that Misr wasn't always like this, the young people scare him too.
Sweet hold chap. I cry when I remember these sweet mercies.
Posted by homesick2 (Member # 3093) on :
quote:Originally posted by sonomod: You's sound so much like some of the young people I met that thought the Taliban was the true Islamic socieity. And that if they tried to recreate a true Islamic society like the Taliban it would rid Misr of all evil American influences. This to my face, my first time in Misr.
Yah, they sounded like haters.
An older person about 70 came up to me in the street and apologized for 911 (which he didn't need to) and told be to be aware that Misr wasn't always like this, the young people scare him too.
Sweet hold chap. I cry when I remember these sweet mercies.
The reason i wrote you're getting loony is that you've started writing about the taliban out of the thin air and for the second time. What brings the taliban into this discussion?What exactly is the problem? you're getting carried away.It's ok to fel sorry for yourself but you're getting paranoid.
Posted by sonomod (Member # 3864) on :
quote:Originally posted by homesick2: The reason i wrote you're getting loony is that you've started writing about the taliban out of the thin air and for the second time. What brings the taliban into this discussion?What exactly is the problem? you're getting carried away.It's ok to fel sorry for yourself but you're getting paranoid.
Are you lucid?
How would you feel if someone walked up to you, your first time in America and said, "We've elected George W. Bush on his Neo-Natzi campaign to rid our country of Arab influences".
Now how does that feel?
Now imagine after spending the last 11 months spending most of your time working overnights, raising a baby single handedly, paying all the bills on your own and handing excess from your student loan (at least $5,000 in the last year), being yelled and cussed at for hours every third day, going without sleep for 48 hours or more at a time because on your husband's day off he won't watch the baby so you can sleep for 2 hours before work. Then to have someone of your husband's nationality to say its better to have a harsh utilitarian regime wipe out your culture's influence and put America 'in its place'.
Then to leave your daughter only because you don't know when you will lose it. Or when you husband fill finally beat you silly like he's promised and the authorities take the child away.
I am starting to wonder if my child is better off without me or my husband.
Posted by akshar (Member # 1680) on :
quote:Originally posted by sonomod: Are you lucid?
How would you feel if someone walked up to you, your first time in America and said, "We've elected George W. Bush on his Neo-Natzi campaign to rid our country of Arab influences".
Now how does that feel?
Now imagine after spending the last 11 months spending most of your time working overnights, raising a baby single handedly, paying all the bills on your own and handing excess from your student loan (at least $5,000 in the last year), being yelled and cussed at for hours every third day, going without sleep for 48 hours or more at a time because on your husband's day off he won't watch the baby so you can sleep for 2 hours before work. Then to have someone of your husband's nationality to say its better to have a harsh utilitarian regime wipe out your culture's influence and put America 'in its place'.
Then to leave your daughter only because you don't know when you will lose it. Or when you husband fill finally beat you silly like he's promised and the authorities take the child away.
I am starting to wonder if my child is better off without me or my husband.
Easy question to answer the child would be better off without you. I can not believe your attitudes and posts. Why on earth are coming to Egypt, please stay away. I don't want someone like you in my beloved Egypt. You give Westerners a bad image with your appaling attitude.
------------------ Jane Akshar UK Co-owner of www.flatsinluxor.co.uk Appartments and Tours in Luxor
Posted by sonomod (Member # 3864) on :
quote:Originally posted by akshar: Easy question to answer the child would be better off without you. I can not believe your attitudes and posts. Why on earth are coming to Egypt, please stay away. I don't want someone like you in my beloved Egypt. You give Westerners a bad image with your appaling attitude.
Okay I will par you with this....
Since the child is better off without me, do you agree with my husband and his friends that and infidel has no right to raise a Muslim child, that I will impair her ascent to paradise?
And Since I should stay away from Egypt, should I use my accumulated evidence of this sham marriage I was tricked into to have my husband petition thrown out so he can be charged with fraud, espionage, and treason; which is a new offense under the US patrioct act?
Why is okay for him to stay here and enjoy the progressive prosperity of the US when I can not see my child?
Does my husband give Arabs a bad image my being an unfaithful, negligent and abusive husband? Or is that what infidels deserve?
I bet you can answer half of my questions without turning into a hypocrit.
Posted by EgyptianDoc77 (Member # 3777) on :
quote:Originally posted by sonomod: That right not allowed to defend myself.
Yet that is so unnatural for me. I have a soul.
People misinformations reaffirms my worst fears of the young generation in Egypt.
And reaffirms my distrust in Europeans.
Why do American youths seem to have such old souls?
I'll stick around the older generation and avoid the young haters who are pro-Taliban.
she is judging young and old souls the way she like and pro-taliban, sonomod certainly ur mislead by ur bad experiences and ur such an offender
------------------ Dr.M.Lotfy Resident Doctor of Dermatology & Andrology
Posted by kay in love (Member # 3444) on :
sonomod
why would some one in egypt need to apologise for 9/11
my irish mates never felt the need to say sorry to me for the birmingham pub bombings
do you think that every irish person is ira? every spanish person is eta? every arab is taliban?
i feel so sad for your situation but you do need help.
you cant keep making such sweeping statements - do you not read the posts in reply to you? - a lot of the people here that relply are arab - they have treated you more kindly than the westerners - not everyone is like your husband - i was married to a jamacan - i had a terrible time but i still love the jamacan people - still have friends there - i have just been thru a bit of heartbreak with an egyptian but i still love the country i would never let my experience with one man colour my perceptions of an entire race.
so get some help - im sure there are organisations that could help you get away from this situation - dont just stay in side the bad times - if you try to help yourself then there is always someone else who will help you.
vito - sorry your thread keeps getting hijacked but i felt that i had to reply. keep in touch with your girl and follow some of the exelent advice you are getting. ask her if she would like to log on here as well - then she can explain her worries.
this is getting to feel like a family - i hope we all get an invite to your wedding vito?
much love kay
Posted by _ (Member # 3567) on :
Sonomod, you don't have to say anything good about anything.
Get out of your horrible marriage and chill out ........ but don't blame another culture for its failure.
Stay in the USA, live in an area where you feel comfortably and go on with your life.
Don't forget you just live once.
Posted by sonomod (Member # 3864) on :
quote:Originally posted by kay in love: [B]sonomod
why would some one in egypt need to apologise for 9/11
my irish mates never felt the need to say sorry to me for the birmingham pub bombings
do you think that every irish person is ira? every spanish person is eta? every arab is taliban?
B]
Strange, talk about jumping to conclusions.
I never said they needed to apologize. If you look at what in brackets () I refered to the fact that he didn't need to.
No the eta is not entirely fully a spanish group. Don't ask, the magazine Mother Jones did an impose on it a few times.
Read posts throughly, otherwise you miss something.
No arabs don't normally support the Taliban unless they want to piss off an American in total culture shock.
The Taliban was created in Afghanistan with the financial help from exiled Saudis, Syrians, and Egyptians. Mainly to buy off officials and for guns.
Yet, of course at one time Irish were searched extensively at Boston Airport.
Now in Brazil they only document American visitors and no one else.
Go figure.
Posted by akshar (Member # 1680) on :
quote:Originally posted by sonomod: Okay I will par you with this....
Since the child is better off without me, do you agree with my husband and his friends that and infidel has no right to raise a Muslim child, that I will impair her ascent to paradise?
No my answer was not from any religious reason but your child would be better of without because you have so much hate in your heart. It is not good to raise a child in this kind of atmosphere.
And Since I should stay away from Egypt, should I use my accumulated evidence of this sham marriage I was tricked into to have my husband petition thrown out so he can be charged with fraud, espionage, and treason; which is a new offense under the US patrioct act?
Why is okay for him to stay here and enjoy the progressive prosperity of the US when I can not see my child?
This has nothing to do with your potential move to Egypt. Comming here will resolve nothing for you. I suggested already you get professional help. You need it badly. Once you have that then make a decision about your future. But with your attitudes you should never come to Egypt.
Does my husband give Arabs a bad image my being an unfaithful, negligent and abusive husband? Or is that what infidels deserve?
You are confusing Arabs and Muslims. I don't generalise about people. I am Christian and my Muslim husband is not unfaithful, negligent or abusive. And if he was it would have nothing to do with his country of origin or his religion.
I bet you can answer half of my questions without turning into a hypocrit.
Well I amswered all of them. You made the assumption that I was Muslim because I stuck up for Arab men and this shows so many things about you.
For God Sake get some help
------------------ Jane Akshar UK Co-owner of www.flatsinluxor.co.uk Appartments and Tours in Luxor
Posted by sonomod (Member # 3864) on :
quote:Originally posted by akshar: Well I amswered all of them. You made the assumption that I was Muslim because I stuck up for Arab men and this shows so many things about you.
For God Sake get some help
And your a second wife which even my husband considers an impaired choice.
I got help, two different psychologists. and I am on meds.
I am 8000 miles from my daughter. Even my mother who wasn't even a good influence on my life growing up, comment that I am a good mother.
I made all the sacrifices, did all the work and coward while he rants.
Besides both psychologists suggested divorce. Noting that my husband is not vested or even handling a small portion of responsibilities.
Your rants help me divise a understanding to avoid some of the more poignant and brutal remarks I have recieved from Muslim and Arab women here and in egypt. They were not as openly aggressive and one sided as you, so I see exactly how their clogs turn. Not to say all the hatred is formed alike in the same fashion.
I know now to stay the heck away from the young women. If was funny to watch my sister-in-laws father and mother tell her to get a life and stop being so mean. Her mother is a good cook and is pretty. Though the youngest son is a major of American philosophy before 1820. That explains why their perceptions are so poisoned and squeed.
There is nothing like being uninformed to make you confident.
Posted by akshar (Member # 1680) on :
quote:Originally posted by sonomod:
Your rants help me divise a understanding to avoid some of the more poignant and brutal remarks I have recieved from Muslim and Arab women here and in egypt.
I know now to stay the heck away from the young women.
There is nothing like being uninformed to make you confident.
Wow are you uninformed I am not young, Arab or Muslim.
Look you have managed to offend, annoy and insult most of the members of this board. I think this says so much about you and the issues you have to deal with. I would talk this over with the Dr's you are seeing and try and see the pattern here.
------------------ Jane Akshar UK Co-owner of www.flatsinluxor.co.uk Appartments and Tours in Luxor
Posted by sonomod (Member # 3864) on :
quote:Originally posted by akshar: Wow are you uninformed I am not young, Arab or Muslim.
Look you have managed to offend, annoy and insult most of the members of this board. I think this says so much about you and the issues you have to deal with. I would talk this over with the Dr's you are seeing and try and see the pattern here.
How about insulting me? Why is it that it is the perception that women are constantly at fault and that men don't have responsibilities.
Face the facts it is common perception in the west that arab women are not treated as equals. Arab women up untill the last 5 decades have lived separate lives from men.
300 NGOs can not be wrong. Check your facts, Islamic professors who happen to be women themselves see a major room for improvement. Even male clerics in the Arab world.
Pre-Islamic culture is still King and it overpowers people's religious sensibilities. There is a spiritual, cultural, and religious Islam as well as Christian counterparts of the three.
Possible denial for you is a way of coping, studying your reactions allow me a route to insulate myself from harm.
Posted by shumza (Member # 913) on :
And are you taking your meds?
Posted by sonomod (Member # 3864) on :
quote:Originally posted by shumza: And are you taking your meds?
Disable my account.
I can tell if yous weaving the fabric that Jack Van Impe cuts his cloth of controversy from.
Talk about reinforcing negative stereotypes.
Posted by shumza (Member # 913) on :
Isn't it ironic that a second wife(which your husband considers an impaired choice)is respected and treated much better than you, a super intelligent middle class American woman?
Askar when was the last time your dh promised to beat you silly?
Wow, two shrinks????? Aren't you special.
[This message has been edited by shumza (edited 24 March 2004).]
Posted by HisCrazyLover (Member # 3458) on :
Oh My GODNESS!!!!!!!!!
unbelieveable my firends... Please do as my mother taught me... Ignore this "touble maker" and "If you have nothing nice to say, PLEASE dont say anything at all!"
Now to get back on the topic........
I am so glad you turned to ES members to help you in your need The one thing I can tell you is this......
Love that is true & strong can overcome even the thickes walls, the most strong boundries. Believe in your feelings, remind her to have faith in you that you will care for her. Remind her to have Faith in God.
Love that is ment to be & blessed by God will be. I speak from experience on this matter. I was belssed with meeting & falling in love with the man I believe Allah intended me to be with.
I am American, he is Egyptian, we have rown together in so many ways & each day I thank God for this wonderful experience. We had many things to overcome as well, but each day little by little we worked it all out.
God bless you & your love... best of luck & remember to have faith!
regards,
HCL
Posted by kay in love (Member # 3444) on :
ok guys
my last word on this
i love egypt
i only met kindness and hospitality from the egyptian men and women that i met
i had a bad experience with one man - and that entailed no abuse apart from a few sweet words - and i cant even start to feel anger towards his country or men in general
finally - i love this forum and the friends i have made - if some folk cant see that there are good PEOPLE here then they are blind
much love kay
Posted by akshar (Member # 1680) on :
quote:Originally posted by shumza: Isn't it ironic that a second wife(which your husband considers an impaired choice)is respected and treated much better than you, a super intelligent middle class American woman?
Akshar when was the last time your dh promised to beat you silly?
Shumza thanks for that it made me laugh and I needed that. I think I shall leave sonomod to herself. We have all given her good advice but she is not listening because she has so much hate inside her. How sad
------------------ Jane Akshar UK Co-owner of www.flatsinluxor.co.uk Appartments and Tours in Luxor
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
OOOOPEs.. Did i miss something?!!! I just went away for one day to be back and find my thread changed to ,,,,, really don know how to describe it,,, Anyway i'm sorry that i'll not be able to be involved in this discussion,i'll b very poor guy,, Tigerlily, Katrina, Thanks alot, 1st i know my gurl over 2 years now,,spent together abt 3 pure three months.she is comming again on july for 2 months, The next visit will be special,i'll introduce her to my family that i told them already abt her,will arrange our future for our relation, She is somehow rich in her country,her father has a flight company and i think it will be the only problem for us,because he is rich and he doesn't like me alot,anyway he loves his daughter alot and will not disappoint her choice,i hope. in the distance we r connecting through sms.i'll not lie in this but i think if she is here i'll not talk 2 her much more than i am talking to her now through sms,everything we do has to be live transmitted through sms,my brother joke abt this and he says" 24/7 live transmetting" ..long call every week,,, our relation is true not just for fun,i really mean it,,just we r not in hurry abt marriage.we intend to do it,but after making sure that this relation will last and strong enough to continue,,also she will not be able to come here in Egypt before finishing study that will end in abt 2 years...so i think its enough for both of us to assure our love and that we can truelly live together,,, Sorry for the Taliban thing,, I trust u people and i trust how u r loving this country and how u see Egyptians,,, Thanks alot Katy for the links i'll make sure to check them all, Just one more question. She trusts me but she jealous alot,,how can i overcome this? i'm really very faithful Thanks alot guys,and sorry for not interfering in the other topics in here,,,also sorry for my weak english.... ViTo,
Posted by EgyptianDoc77 (Member # 3777) on :
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Vito: [B]OOOOPEs..
salam vito
i dont think someone who is not concerned to be real enough and faithful would simply post a personal stuff overhere this way so i believe ur a real guy and much interested and inshallah may allah bless ur relation
vito if its meant to be it will be beggad, and if its for good inshallah god would help u much. Just be faihtful and know that god is ur witness, if ur seeking her for the good and for a pure relation god knows all and certainly pray for him and go ahead and why dont u " estekhara" and go ahead and just accept whats meant to be at the end
barak allahu fik and may allah give u much as ur intentions are...
be bald, go get ur princess and remember to not fall off ur horse :
salam ya 7obby
------------------ Dr.M.Lotfy Resident Doctor of Dermatology & Andrology
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
Dr.m.lotfy, Thanks alot for your advice i think i should do so, also don worry i'm good in riding horses,,, Salam ya 7oby
Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
[QUOTE]Originally posted by EgyptianDoc77: [
be bald, go get ur princess and remember to not fall off ur horse :
But will she still love him with no hair ......... sorrrrry could not resist that one.
Posted by EgyptianDoc77 (Member # 3777) on :
quote:Originally posted by Penny: [QUOTE]Originally posted by EgyptianDoc77: [
be bald, go get ur princess and remember to not fall off ur horse :
But will she still love him with no hair ......... sorrrrry could not resist that one.
hehehehee, thats funny , being oriented to baldness as part of my work i rather typed " bald " than type " bold" hehehehehe
but thx god it was meant to draw a smile on ur cute face penny.... : hehehehehe
be safe
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
u draw a smile on her face but u removed the hair from my head.... where r u Katrina ?!!!
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
delete
[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 23 May 2004).]
Posted by katrina (Member # 3747) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vito: u draw a smile on her face but u removed the hair from my head.... where r u Katrina ?!!!
hey, buddy, what do you mean? hehee
Posted by Vito (Member # 535) on :
katrina, I know its amazin thing to be back to ur past or atleast some memories from ur past,,i hope u r enjoying ur stay in Chicago, Thanks for valuble advices i really felt little relax and i'm sure u r true,,just patient is the only solution for me now,,, Ur question abt age is very hard for me to answer,, i'll be 22 on june.. I've ur emil and will contact u,,hope to hear from u always Yours Sam,
Posted by hassancheb (Member # 4863) on :
quote:Originally posted by sonomod: Okay I will par you with this....
Since the child is better off without me, do you agree with my husband and his friends that and infidel has no right to raise a Muslim child, that I will impair her ascent to paradise?
And Since I should stay away from Egypt, should I use my accumulated evidence of this sham marriage I was tricked into to have my husband petition thrown out so he can be charged with fraud, espionage, and treason; which is a new offense under the US patrioct act?
Why is okay for him to stay here and enjoy the progressive prosperity of the US when I can not see my child?
Does my husband give Arabs a bad image my being an unfaithful, negligent and abusive husband? Or is that what infidels deserve?
I bet you can answer half of my questions without turning into a hypocrit.
Let's see, he's "negligent, unfaithful, abusive, and you're in a fraudulent sham marriage"..... But "at least he was never a busboy"!
Posted by egyptianbeast (Member # 7516) on :
quote:Originally posted by sonomod: How about insulting me? Why is it that it is the perception that women are constantly at fault and that men don't have responsibilities.
Face the facts it is common perception in the west that arab women are not treated as equals. Arab women up untill the last 5 decades have lived separate lives from men.
300 NGOs can not be wrong. Check your facts, Islamic professors who happen to be women themselves see a major room for improvement. Even male clerics in the Arab world.
Pre-Islamic culture is still King and it overpowers people's religious sensibilities. There is a spiritual, cultural, and religious Islam as well as Christian counterparts of the three.
Possible denial for you is a way of coping, studying your reactions allow me a route to insulate myself from harm.
quote:Originally posted by hassancheb: Let's see, he's "negligent, unfaithful, abusive, and you're in a fraudulent sham marriage"..... But "at least he was never a busboy"!
Alright I'll sink to your level hasselchump You are a massive bitch.
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