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T O P I C     R E V I E W
kay in love
Member # 3444
 - posted
hi guys

sorry i have not been in touch for a while but university and stuff took over a bit!

thought i owed you the closeing chapter of my story being as you were all so helpful and tolerant, listening to me.

if you dont want to read a relationship story then i sugest that you go to anouther thread now. (some people seem very down on us broken hearted folk at the moment???) so at the risk of being called every thing from stupid to easy here goes.

well as some of my friends know i should be sitting in sunny beautiful egypt right now! but im not - im still in oxford and its snowing!
all was set for my trip- ticket bought, emails and texts going back and forth - counting the days........then..........he called and asked me to pospone my trip for a couple of months.....??????....why i asked ....because his buisiness was in trouble and he had to move out of his flat and he had no money.... i said i would go anyway and stay in a hotel but he said that was no good - we could not 'be' together unless we were married (marrage was the one thing he did not sugest - did not know if i was offended or relievd lol)........i was upset, especialy as my ticket was non refundable and i could not change the flight..........we did not speak for a week........ i became resigned that it was over and that i was not going.
then......he called and said could i still go?????? i said i could and and then he said i could no longer stay with his family but could i get a room so we could be together.....but i would have to pay for it as he had no money..........i explained that i had very little money and could only go in the first place because i could stay with his family - he was not pleased.
i felt hurt as i did not feel he was giving me full details of what was going on - some things he just would not explain.
he said that we could manage on very little and could get a room together as there was no point in me geting a hotel room because we could not 'be' together there..........this all sounded very different to what had been arranged..........so i said i could not go - he was upset and said if i did not go then he would not wait for me till the summer.......i said there was nothing i could do and if he could not wait for me then that was his disision.

we did not speak for a couple of days then he called again asking me to go - lots of sweet words..........by this time it was the night before my flight - i was resigned to the fact that i was not going to go and pay him to sleep with me - better to lose my ticket money than lose anything else!!!!

so here i am in the snow in england - a bit down but ok - a little older and maybe a bit wiser????

so thats it really......he has called me a few times but not much has been said.
im not sure how i got so carried away by the situation - im not given to falling in love with reckless abandon (maybe it was the sun!) - all i can say is that i still love egypt and will go back some day - i have not and would never change my feelings towards such a wonderful country and such great warm people just because i had a disagreement with one person.

hope i have not bored you all - thanks for listening and all the good advice.
much love to you all my dear friends
kay
XXX
 

Mimmi
Member # 3606
 - posted
Sorry to hear what happened, you must feel really down.
I am sure something better will be ahead for you just keep your head up.
 
wacobaco
Member # 3640
 - posted
kay, i may read a lot about that damn topic, fell hurt as egyptian male, but not participating much, coze the very little times i participated, i upset unintentionally those victims, whom those i think should share their hunters' bad deeds, the positive participation i did was calling for an imaginary Egyptians-foreigners society, and may it be true on a small scale.. at the same time i read lots of ur posts without participating, but after this post, i found myself eager to write to u to congratulate u, u saved us from other sad story, other disgraceful example of Egy men, and u safe ur self being other broken heart, u r tough girl.. objective and illuminating, i'd like to get to know such a character one day ..go ahead Oxford Brave.. cheers
 
MotherEgypt
Member # 3700
 - posted
i do not feel sorry for you ,,,and i wonder why did not you go ,,stay in cheap hotel room ,,enjoy the sun ,chat with a friend over a cold beer ,,get brown and come home happy ..

dear congratulations you have beaten your weakness.
welcome to Egypt whenever you decide to come ,,i can help you with this without paying for me to sleep with you ,,,

cheers
 

_
Member # 3567
 - posted

Why wasting your time with a person like that ........ thumbs up, Kayinlove, you showed him .......


MotherEgypt, what's wrong with you???????

[This message has been edited by Tigerlily (edited 23 March 2004).]
 

wacobaco
Member # 3640
 - posted
MotherEgypt .. SHAME ON YOU ...
aren't u the one who narrated, somewhere before, his sad experience about being beaten in Russia, and got the sympathy of all ESmembers? (even i think u deserve another welcoming one here)
then u got the encouragement of all of them again when u announced u r searching for a girl and a dog to marry ..oppp.. sorry i mean a girl to marry and a dog to buy .. but no luck !! (i'm not wondering now why u r fiasco)
what is that happening in this site? some come at the beginning and play the role of Angel ..then, just like that, turns to be Devil? .. is this some kind of a game?
MotherEgypt .. i think after all ur NICE posts ..
u would better change ur username here from MotherEgypt to MotherF***** MotherF***** ...pl ...behave urself...
CHEERS ..

 
wacobaco
Member # 3640
 - posted
MotherEgypt .. after re -reading ur post .. i doubt that i may misunderstand ur words .. but..put ur self in my shoes ..read ur own words ..
"i do not feel sorry for you ,,,"
"chat with a friend over a cold beer "
"i can help you with <<this>> without paying for me <<to sleep with you>> ,,,"
ur starting sentence wasn't the perfect start i believe .. but, regardless that, if i really misunderstood ur words .. and u wrote this with good intentions.. i think i owe u an apology ..
N: i tried to delete my previous post.. but wasn't allowed to.. so i thought i have to clear things out ..again if ur intentions r good.. pl..no hard feelings


 

MotherEgypt
Member # 3700
 - posted
Man , Man ,
No worries
like they said if you wanna live happily
there is 2 rules
1 ) do not worry about the small stuff
2 )Everything is small stuff

but the only thing i did not understand ,,,and i wonder what do you mean is ( put ur self in my shoes ) hey what is your feet size

Cheers Mate
 

Raymon
Member # 3727
 - posted
kay in love,

He doesn't deserve you ... that's it.

Forget him like you forget everything else. Not only you are better off without him, but also with wisdom you escaped a setup arranged for you, as prey.

I can really understand your feeling, and I understand that your pain is because you trusted him more than you loved him, but life is life. C'est la vie.

And pain is pain ... it is gonna take time.

Please think of it the other way down. What if you went there and he slept with you ... what after that.
You see, there are many sad stories about sad marriages, how about relationships based on desire.

I think you should consider yourself lucky ... or as Egyptians say “God loves you” to the extent that He let you know about that guy on time.

Take it easy on yourself ... weep sometime ... laugh sometime ... get busy sometime ... until your sadness gradually calms down.

Following are some advices by about.com … although directed to teens but I believe work fine for adults:

Here's How:

  • You may feel really low and completely unmotivated right now, but if you can force yourself at first to take these steps, it will get easier!
  • Give your friends a call and setup a time to do something fun.
  • Do the things you used to enjoy but were not able to do when you were dating your ex.
  • Throw yourself into the activities you've been thinking about getting involved in, but haven't had time for.
  • Let yourself be around your ex.
  • If you feel like you want to get back together, repeat steps 1-5.
  • If you're comfortable being around your ex and don't feel the need to slip back into your old relationship, congratulations! You have moved on with your life!

Tips:
  • When a person is in a serious relationship, sometimes s/he may put less effort into maintaining friendships. This means you're going to have to be the on to take the first step in repairing your friendships.
  • Sometimes a person can identify his/herself by the relationship (ex: seeing yourself as 'Ashely's boyfriend'). This can be hard to deal with when the relationship is over and you're left without an identity.
  • Getting over someone is a tough, but you'll learn a lot about yourself and the kind of relationship you want for the future.


You can also check these links:
http://enotalone.com/article/2445.html
http://www.inq7.net/lif/2003/nov/26/lif_25-1.htm
http://www.thespark.com/features/breakup/
http://www.lovingyou.com/content/singles/content.shtml?ART=breakup


------------------

Raymon www.youregypt.com

[This message has been edited by Raymon (edited 23 March 2004).]
 

katrina
Member # 3747
 - posted
.

[This message has been edited by katrina (edited 23 May 2004).]
 

esposible
Member # 2955
 - posted
Kayinlove you have made a smart decision. You should be glad it did not go further than that.
 
akshar
Member # 1680
 - posted
Kay how wise you are to see this as one isolated man rather than symptomatic of Egypt. I glad you can sepearate to two. He sounds like a sleasy bag and you are better off without him but that doesn't stop you being hurt by it all. I bet you hoped it would be a great relationship. I sorry that you proved to be a million times better person than him.

------------------
Jane Akshar UK Co-owner of www.flatsinluxor.co.uk Appartments and Tours in Luxor
 

Shareen
Member # 989
 - posted
Kay
I am sorry things didnt work out for you, but you hurry and get your degree, go sledging if you have too and look to the future.
What happened, happened, and you can still go back to Egypt, but next time, it will be just for you! Take a friend, go and enjoy the hospitality, the sights, the food. Lose yourself in the hustle and bustle.
But above all, never let a man destroy your love of Egypt.
Take care
Best Regards
Shareen
 
ChilliSnail
Member # 3757
 - posted
Dear Kay

Alfa Mabrouk Habibti. Even though you are most probably feeling a lot of pain right now, you certainly have had a lucky escape. Shareen summed it all up in the last post. "Never let a man destroy your love of Egypt". Men come and go and can be crushingly disappointing but Egypt will always be there and will always be a soucre of wonder and beauty.

I even recommend Egypt to any female friends who are trying to recover from heartbreak to take a trip here. Nothing like being hassled 24/7 (hello, hello, where are you from my Queen, I love you, you have the most beautiful eyes, you are sooooo beautiful)to make you hate men and forget about that heartbreak.

May a thousand rabid fleas from a diseased camel infest the arm pits of this shebsheb wearing scoundrel.

Best of luck to you
 

kay in love
Member # 3444
 - posted
dearest friends

thankyou so much for your posts
how can i be sad when i have such friends?

much love to you all
kay
 

karinfarid
Member # 3352
 - posted
dear Kay,

I'm so sorry to read about the end of your story, it started out looking so bright and positive. But then I'm much more glad that you discovered the truth early enough, an end with a shock is better than a shock without end, says a german proverb

never let go of hope and your positive attitude, I'm sure someone who deserves you is waiting out there for you, and inshaAllah you'll find him sooner or later.

big hug and salam, Karin
 

maadi_guy
Member # 3075
 - posted
hey my dear friend be careful. I think he's just looking for fun, do u know him will? did you see him befor and spent with him alonge time??
if he really love you he'll ask you to marry him or at least to come to Egypt not to sleep together but to talk about your futureand arrange what will you do?
I think, sorry to say that, he didn't love you, he just thought that he can spend sometimes with you just for enjoyable.. it's really to bad to see someone like that.. he have a real relationship with someone who really loves him but he don't care.
try to talk with him directly and let him tell you what he think about your futur?? and let us know. don't sink in love, you've to think about your futur together first and when you be sure that he love you, you've to do anything to be together..
take care..
 
HisCrazyLover
Member # 3458
 - posted
I'm so sorry to hear this news Kay! I too have been away busy with life in general & have not been on the board for a while.

I'm so glad you got out basically unscathed. You are a bright woman wioth a whonerful personality & I am sure you will find the one God has picked out just for you.

Have faith my friend!

*hugs*

HCL

 

EgyptianDoc77
Member # 3777
 - posted
[QUOTE]Originally posted by kay in love:

kay

iam so sorry for all that but iam sure ull have the best, be patient , u deserve the best and surely ur a faithful person, and ur posts, not only this one shows the type of person u r, and the far bright sweet person u r..

may god bless u dear


------------------
Dr.M.Lotfy
Resident Doctor of Dermatology & Andrology
 

Penny
Member # 1925
 - posted
Dear Dear Kay

Realy sorry it did not work out. At least you found out early and were so strong and it only cost you the price of a flight.

All the best with your degree course. Hard work is always such a healer. Be proud of yourself you made all the right decisions and something good will come your way soon.

All the best
Bye for now XX
 

BoBBoSS
Member # 3456
 - posted
Kay

good choice , that is the strong Kay i want to hear about, go on girl, cheer up , u did the right thing, and the right thing always hard

------------------
BoBBoSS
 

kay in love
Member # 3444
 - posted
hello my friends

wont be here for a couple of weeks - going to stay with my family for easter break - and will have no web !!!!!!

i will be thinking of you even tho i wont be able to post - take care and i will be back soon

much love and thanks for being such wonderful friends - the world is a better place with you in it.
kay
XX
 




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