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To pursue or not to persue?
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by Penny: [QB] [QUOTE]Originally posted by Pillar: [qb] And the reason I felt that way about you was exactly the same as it is today. Because you were going to Egypt, to marry an ORFI marriage to stay together in an apartment so you could 'get to know him better'. You even said that you could not marry someone you had not had sex with. What I actually said is 'dont take your values and apply them on muslim society' In other words, dont go and get an orfi so you can have this man stay with you as boyfriend and girlfriend, because that is not allowed in Islam. I am a muslim, I stand by what I said, and your arguments since have proved that you do not consider it a marriage. Otherwise you would not be saying 'its just something Egyptian people do' to your friends, and then come here arguing how its a socially accepted marriage. It is not accepted IN ISLAM, your 'husband' Is a muslim. You USED it. THAT is what I am against. Women going and doing this and then making out to the world its 'what Egyptians do' I know many other people with ORFI's, do you know why they dont bother me? Because they accept how things are. They do not shout from the rooftops how their way of doing things is the right way and how the Islamic way is wrong. They also dont tell me to keep my Islamic opinion to myself - but of course we never get to that because they DO NOT have a SUPERIORITY COMPLEX! Which brings me right back to where we started. [/qb][/QUOTE]Pillar I honestly do not think WK is saying her way is best and the Islamic way is wrong. She is simply saying what is right for her personally and is accepting that may not be right for others. It sounds as though this ORFI that started as boyfriend/ girlfriend has grown into something much deeper and that should be respected. Many of us were right to warn her in the beginning of the pitfalls but you have to commend that she has gone and done the time and built something that could last and is right for her and her partner. I dont wish to get into an argument about whether ORFI is Islamically acceptable or not but there are many that will say it is, providing the right conditions are met. I have said it before and I will say it again most Egyptian's are not that bothered how you are married if they see a proper marriage and these two are moving towards this. Egypt is not some sort of perfect Islamic society, far from it, it is full of hypocracy...and to be honest a few OFRI contracts are the least of its problems. I really don't see why you find it necessary to be so hard on WK. [/QB][/QUOTE]
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