- It’s allowed or not allowed to say “I love you” to your gf/bf during fasting (Ramadan) and why?! - It’s allowed or not allowed to have contact (sex) with your gf/bf after fasting?!
just want to hear your opinion! especially for those egyptian/muslim..
note: the guy is muslim, the girl is non-muslim Posts: 76 | From: "The Dessert" | Registered: Sep 2007
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During the fast you are to refrain from food, drink, smoking, sex. That is from sunrise to sunset. After sunset, anything goes. And I think it would just be a polite thing to do to not tempt the guy with trying to kiss during the fasting time. Would be kinda cruel...no?? And it would depend on how you said the "I love you" during that fasting time. If the girl's intention was to be tempting or alluring, then again...I would say that would fall into the cruel category.
Posts: 1103 | From: 6th of October | Registered: Jun 2007
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quote:Originally posted by mysterious girl: Hey guys, I have a few questions:
- It’s allowed or not allowed to say “I love you” to your gf/bf during fasting (Ramadan) and why?! - It’s allowed or not allowed to have contact (sex) with your gf/bf after fasting?!
just want to hear your opinion! especially for those egyptian/muslim..
note: the guy is muslim, the girl is non-muslim
LOL...if the man is a practising Muslim he is only able to say and do those things with someone he is married to, whether he is fasting or not; he would not have a gf/bf. And he would only be able to have sex with his wife after he had broken his fast. The woman's religion doesn't alter the situation, as he is a Muslim man it is the same for him no matter what.
The fact that he has a gf/bf that he is having sex with means that he has already broken "the rules" and is making his own rules up as he is going along.
Posts: 4576 | From: Cairo | Registered: Jun 2002
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quote:Originally posted by jean_bean: After sunset, anything goes.
really?.. why he told me that its not allowed to sleep with me after fasting because im just only her gf and were not yet married. Posts: 76 | From: "The Dessert" | Registered: Sep 2007
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quote:Originally posted by mysterious girl: Hey guys, I have a few questions:
- It’s allowed or not allowed to say “I love you” to your gf/bf during fasting (Ramadan) and why?! - It’s allowed or not allowed to have contact (sex) with your gf/bf after fasting?!
just want to hear your opinion! especially for those egyptian/muslim..
note: the guy is muslim, the girl is non-muslim
LOL...if the man is a practising Muslim he is only able to say and do those things with someone he is married to, whether he is fasting or not; he would not have a gf/bf. And he would only be able to have sex with his wife after he had broken his fast. The woman's religion doesn't alter the situation, as he is a Muslim man it is the same for him no matter what.
The fact that he has a gf/bf that he is having sex with means that he has already broken "the rules" and is making his own rules up as he is going along.
yeah, he is a muslim since birth (lol) i read in one article that muslim is not allowed to sleep with someone if they're not yet married..but some of them doing it..
im a non-muslim in our religion it also not allowed to sleep with someone before married its called pre-marital sex.
i therefore conclude that its not in the religion whether you are a muslim on non-muslim its in the person it self. Posts: 76 | From: "The Dessert" | Registered: Sep 2007
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Very smart conclusion mysterious girl. All religions are 'based' on 'almost' the same thing with a very similar goal at the end of the day: RESPECT. If you sleep or have pre-marital sex with someone, and then it does'nt work out, and you try another, and then another etc...it seems that self respect at one point is gone, wouldn't you say?
If you sleep or have pre-marital sex with someone and you become pregnant, and he denies his name to the child, and says he is not sure he is the father and other very cowardly things, and you have to prove it in court, and go through DNA and what not, what happens to your self respect?
And if a muslim man doesn't want to have pre-marital sex ONLY in the month of Ramadan, then he is a hypocrite.
Posts: 919 | Registered: Aug 2007
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quote:Originally posted by jean_bean: After sunset, anything goes.
really?.. why he told me that its not allowed to sleep with me after fasting because im just only her gf and were not yet married.
Moslems tend to follow religious rules more closely during Ramadan than they do around the year. This may be viewed as respect, weakness, or hypocrisy, but nonetheless that's what happens. For instance, some Moslems who drink alcohol would stop during Ramadan. In your boyfriend's case, the rule that he is breaking in general but is now following during Ramadan is the prohibition of sex outside of marriage.
This is a separate issue from the timing of sex during Ramadan. Abstaining from sex is part of the fast itself, so he would not be allowed to have sex with you during Ramadan any time after sunset until Fajr (which is about an hour before sunrise), even if you were married to him.
Posts: 374 | From: men gheir laff w dawaran | Registered: Sep 2007
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quote:Originally posted by Politically Incorrect: he would not be allowed to have sex with you during Ramadan any time after sunset until Fajr (which is about an hour before sunrise), even if you were married to him.
I meant the other way around , he would not be allowed to have sex with you during Ramadan any time after Fajr (which is about an hour before sunrise) until sunset even if you were married to him.
Posts: 374 | From: men gheir laff w dawaran | Registered: Sep 2007
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quote:Originally posted by Almaz.: Very smart conclusion mysterious girl. All religions are 'based' on 'almost' the same thing with a very similar goal at the end of the day: RESPECT. If you sleep or have pre-marital sex with someone, and then it does'nt work out, and you try another, and then another etc...it seems that self respect at one point is gone, wouldn't you say?
If you sleep or have pre-marital sex with someone and you become pregnant, and he denies his name to the child, and says he is not sure he is the father and other very cowardly things, and you have to prove it in court, and go through DNA and what not, what happens to your self respect?
And if a muslim man doesn't want to have pre-marital sex ONLY in the month of Ramadan, then he is a hypocrite.
yehey! (clap..clap..clap..) my conclusion is smart -LOL
im not againts for muslim religion i respect them but i cnt get why during ramadan there's a lot of limitation then after ramadan they will do it again, back to normal.. but as i was saying its not in a religion its in the person itself.. Posts: 76 | From: "The Dessert" | Registered: Sep 2007
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quote:Originally posted by jean_bean: After sunset, anything goes.
really?.. why he told me that its not allowed to sleep with me after fasting because im just only her gf and were not yet married.
Moslems tend to follow religious rules more closely during Ramadan than they do around the year. This may be viewed as respect, weakness, or hypocrisy, but nonetheless that's what happens. For instance, some Moslems who drink alcohol would stop during Ramadan. In your boyfriend's case, the rule that he is breaking in general but is now following during Ramadan is the prohibition of sex outside of marriage.
yeah they need to follow it, so that allah will forgive them for all those sin that they made for the entire year.. but after ramadan they will start again to do a mistake.. Posts: 76 | From: "The Dessert" | Registered: Sep 2007
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Moslems tend to follow religious rules more closely during Ramadan than they do around the year. This may be viewed as respect, weakness, or hypocrisy, but nonetheless that's what happens. For instance, some Moslems who drink alcohol would stop during Ramadan. In your boyfriend's case, the rule that he is breaking in general but is now following during Ramadan is the prohibition of sex outside of marriage.[/QUOTE]yeah they need to follow it, so that allah will forgive them for all those sin that they made for the entire year.. but after ramadan they will start again to do a mistake.. [/QUOTE] I understand your reaction, but when all is said and done it will be God and God alone who decides for each of us whether our efforts were good enough or not. You never know what could tip the balance.
Posts: 374 | From: men gheir laff w dawaran | Registered: Sep 2007
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just only base on my observation yeah, i know at the end of this God will know if it is worth it or not
-------------------- "Don't go for looks; they can deceive. Don't go for wealth; even that fades away. Go for someone who makes u SMILE, because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright. Find the one that make ur HEART SMILE! :-). . ." Posts: 76 | From: "The Dessert" | Registered: Sep 2007
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quote:Originally posted by Politically Incorrect: I understand your reaction, but when all is said and done it will be God and God alone who decides for each of us whether our efforts were good enough or not. You never know what could tip the balance.
It might help to tip the balance, rather than knowingly doing things that are forbidden for 11 months of the year and hoping that one month of trying to avoid them will help Allah to forget the other months, to instead avoid those things for 12 months of the year and then do one month of additional good deeds to tip the balance for the occasional moments of weakness Posts: 4576 | From: Cairo | Registered: Jun 2002
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quote:Originally posted by newcomer: It might help to tip the balance, rather than knowingly doing things that are forbidden for 11 months of the year and hoping that one month of trying to avoid them will help Allah to forget the other months, to instead avoid those things for 12 months of the year and then do one month of additional good deeds to tip the balance for the occasional moments of weakness
I know you didn't mean it that way, but "help Allah forget" was unfortunate choice of words. God doesn't need any "help" to forgive someone, and He certainly does not forget anything.
There is no question that it is better to be good all the time. The question is, for someone who is not good all the time, is it better to at least try to be good during Ramadan.
Posts: 374 | From: men gheir laff w dawaran | Registered: Sep 2007
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My choice of words was intentional Politically Incorrect. I know that Allah doesn't forget, but when people try to be good for one month and are knowingly bad for 11, it looks as if they are trying to pull the wool over Allah's eyes.
Posts: 4576 | From: Cairo | Registered: Jun 2002
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quote:Originally posted by newcomer: My choice of words was intentional Politically Incorrect. I know that Allah doesn't forget, but when people try to be good for one month and are knowingly bad for 11, it looks as if they are trying to pull the wool over Allah's eyes.
You have a very good point here.
It is better to try and be good for the whole 12 months, it is just false otherwise. As you say god watches every thing
Posts: 643 | From: Over there | Registered: Aug 2007
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Pink Cherry: ''You have a very good point here.
It is better to try and be good for the whole 12 months, it is just false otherwise. As you say god watches every thing''
Agreed. If people on ES see straight through these types, you can bet it won't escape a much higher power !
Posts: 2953 | From: Slightly south of Azkaban. | Registered: Aug 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Korvin's: Having sex without marriage is forbidden by Islam in Ramadan and the whole year ...
It applies only for good moslem men who have strong commitment with their faiths and afraid of Allah.
Posts: 756 | From: ...be solution... | Registered: Jul 2007
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quote:Originally posted by Korvin's: Having sex without marriage is forbidden by Islam in Ramadan and the whole year ...
It applies only for good moslem men who have strong commitment with their faiths and afraid of Allah.
The ruling actually applies to all Muslim men and women, but it is only the good ones who try to carry it out Posts: 4576 | From: Cairo | Registered: Jun 2002
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quote:Originally posted by Korvin's: Having sex without marriage is forbidden by Islam in Ramadan and the whole year ...
It applies only for good moslem men who have strong commitment with their faiths and afraid of Allah.
What that supposed to mean? Please enlighten us here some more.
Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Angel Heart: [QUOTE]Originally posted by Korvin's: [qb] Having sex without marriage is forbidden by Islam in Ramadan and the whole year ...
It applies only for good moslem men who have strong commitment with their faiths and afraid of Allah.
you mean if one muslim involved in pre-marital or sex before marriage he is not a good muslim Posts: 76 | From: "The Dessert" | Registered: Sep 2007
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quote:Originally posted by Angel Heart: [QUOTE]Originally posted by Korvin's: [qb] Having sex without marriage is forbidden by Islam in Ramadan and the whole year ...
It applies only for good moslem men who have strong commitment with their faiths and afraid of Allah.
you mean if one muslim involved in pre-marital or sex before marriage he is not a good muslim
Or it could be seen as an excuse to have it because someone is not overly religious and most of all not afraid of god.
Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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To correct perceptions about Ramadan and fasting.
Ramadan is month in which a man and woman practice to refrain from all desires and pleasures to learn how to control themselves when the real challanges come up. It's sort of strict mental, spiritual and physical training that lasts for 30 days once in a year.
For instance, Ramadan and fasting teaches you how to be patient, how to wait to get something, how to apprecaite water after you don't drink it whole day, how to appreciate food that many don't have, how to forgive and repair family relationships, how to correct your behavior and improve your strength, your spiritual connection, how to control your desires, how to say no, how to control your habits, how to purify yourself, how to do so many things...
I fast for years, and I love it. This has nothing to do with fear, it's all about love. In other words people don't fast because they are afraid. They fast because they want to fast. During 30 days it's STRICT, it's supposed to be strict, how else you would know difference between having and not having, eating and not eating, it's "strict training that lasts 30 days".
Fasting is amazingly important because it streagthens your faith, it's incredibly powerful and I recommend it to everyone. Especially to Prince of Nothing, at least for 3 days I bet he can't do it.
Now look what I said, and what people wrote before me. How some see and interpret fasting is fascinating to me.
Posts: 1039 | Registered: Jun 2007
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quote:Originally posted by newcomer: It might help to tip the balance, rather than knowingly doing things that are forbidden for 11 months of the year and hoping that one month of trying to avoid them will help Allah to forget the other months, to instead avoid those things for 12 months of the year and then do one month of additional good deeds to tip the balance for the occasional moments of weakness
I know you didn't mean it that way, but "help Allah forget" was unfortunate choice of words. God doesn't need any "help" to forgive someone, and He certainly does not forget anything.
There is no question that it is better to be good all the time. The question is, for someone who is not good all the time, is it better to at least try to be good during Ramadan.
No one is good all of the time.
Posts: 3891 | From: No good deed goes unpunished. | Registered: May 2007
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Some people do good some don't, it's important that person tries his very best.
Fasting teaches you: self-discipline.
Ramadan is also a month of charity and forgiveness, a month in which Muslims focus to intensify humanitarian services, to practice patience and humbleness, to refrain from things ..
No sexual contact if married during the entire month of Ramadan.
He can tell you he loves you.
If anyone, through forgetfulness, does something that would ordinarily break the fast, his fast stands valid, provided he stops doing that thing the moment he realizes what he is doing.
For instance, you forget and drink water by accident.
On completion of the fast of Ramadan, the special charity known as "Sadagat-ul-Fitr" is given. This is duty, fasting is duty too.
You give to those who don't have, sick, poor, etc... often ANONYMOUSLY.
Posts: 1039 | Registered: Jun 2007
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So how are you self- restraining yourself from pleasure and sexual desires if you can have sex from aprox 7 pm until 4 am DAILY?
Don't you want to refrain from sex for the whole month of Ramadan?
We fast, in part, to give up our "wants", so how are you giving up anything if you can have sex when you usually have sex anyway!
When you don't have sex entire month you make a clear statement that your real submission is to God and not to the temptations of your body however strong they may be. That's one of the major reasons why do you fast in the 1st place.
Posts: 1039 | Registered: Jun 2007
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I think you don't do enough, and would not follow you in this.
If you can have sex from 7 pm until 4 am on daily bases for entire month of Ramadan, you don't restrain yourself from sex ( for enitre month of Ramadan ) since you are having it when you are usually having it anyway.
If you usually have sex between 4 am - 7 pm and then you are restraining yourself during these fasting HOURS I would say that's self-explanatory, now you are really fasting.
But you do not usually have sex between 4 am - 7 pm.
People usually have sex later between 7 pm - mornings ( working hours ( 6-7 am - til early evening are often taking all your time early in the day , etc.. )
So by you being able to have sex after 7 pm, you don't really restrain yourself.
Plus sex is not food. You can live without sex for more than 7 days, while you can't live without food.
Posts: 1039 | Registered: Jun 2007
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quote:Originally posted by lovingmylife: I think you don't do enough, and would not follow you in this. If you can have sex from 7 pm until 4 am on daily bases for entire month of Ramadan, you don't restrain yourself from sex ( for enitre month of Ramadan ) since you are having it when you are usually having it anyway.
Lovingmylife:
The restraint in Ramadan is specified by God and by God alone. The beginning of verse 187 in Surat Albaqara (chapter 2 of the Quran) reads "uhilla lakom laylata-lsseyami alrafathu ila nisa'ikom" (It is permitted at night for you to have sex with your wives).
Posts: 374 | From: men gheir laff w dawaran | Registered: Sep 2007
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"It has been made permissible for you the night preceding fasting to go to your wives [for sexual relations]. They are clothing for you and you are clothing for them. Allah knows that you used to deceive yourselves, so He accepted your repentance and forgave you. So now, have relations with them and seek that which Allah has decreed for you. And eat and drink until the white thread of dawn becomes distinct to you from the black thread [of night]. Then complete the fast until the sunset. And do not have relations with them as long as you are staying for worship in the mosques [for i'tikaf]. These are the limits [set by] Allah, so do not approach them. Thus does Allāh make clear His ordinances to the people that they may become righteous." (Surah Baqarah, 2: 187)
These are the limits set by Allah, if you insist on doing more than this you are making your own rules in the religion and you are not submitting to Allah.
Posts: 4576 | From: Cairo | Registered: Jun 2002
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quote:Originally posted by newcomer: "It has been made permissible for you the night preceding fasting to go to your wives [for sexual relations]. They are clothing for you and you are clothing for them. Allah knows that you used to deceive yourselves, so He accepted your repentance and forgave you. So now, have relations with them and seek that which Allah has decreed for you. And eat and drink until the white thread of dawn becomes distinct to you from the black thread [of night]. Then complete the fast until the sunset. And do not have relations with them as long as you are staying for worship in the mosques. These are the limits [set by] Allah, so do not approach them. Thus does Allāh make clear His ordinances to the people that they may become righteous." (Surah Baqarah, 2: 187)
These are the limits set by Allah, if you insist on doing more than this you are making your own rules in the religion and you are not submitting to Allah.
Agreed and also note that god will punish you if you left your wife without giving her needs as its clearly stated on quran as well maybe you can help me newcomer on that one
YOU CANT forbid you wife from having sex with u for more then x days as i remmber as that would be hager any how i think this will sort it out
د. أحمد الحجي الكردي أ. د. أحمد الحجي الكردي خبير في الموسوعة الفقهية، وعضو هيئة الإفتاء في دولة الكويت
تاريخ النشر 2007-05-17 عنوان الفتوى حكم هجر الزوج لزوجته دون سبب شرعي السؤال ماحكم هجر الزوح لزوجته دون سبب بالفراش والمحادثه. الفتوى بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم الحمد لله رب العالمين، والصلاة والسلام على سيدنا محمد خاتم الأنبياء والمرسلين، وعلى آله وأصحابه أجمعين، والتابعين، ومن تبع هداهم بإحسان إلى يوم الدين، وبعد: فلا يجوز للزوج أن يتعمد هجران زوجته أبدا، قصرت المدة أو طالت، لأن ذلك نوع إيذاء لها، وهو حرام شرعا، وقد أمر الله تعالى الأزواج بالإحسان لزوجاتهم، ومنعهم من الإساءة إليهن، والهجران من أشد أنواع الإساءة، ولكن لو حدت بالزوج ظروف قاهره دعته إلى نوع من الهجران، كالمرض أو السفر مثلا، فلا يلام في ذلك، وعلى الزوجة في هذه الحال أن تصبر وتحتسب. وكذلك يباح للزوج أن يهجر زوجته إذا قصرت في حق ربها أو في حق زوجها بغير مبرر ونصحها ولم يفد النصح، ولكن بمقدار ما يردعها عن تقصيرها ويعيدها إلى الطريق الصحيح، لكن ينبغي أن لا يطيل الرجل هجر زوجته أكثر من اللازم لإصلاحها، لأن ذلك مضارة، وهي ممنوعة شرعاً. قال تعالى : (وَاللاتِي تَخَافُونَ نُشُوزَهُنَّ فَعِظُوهُنَّ وَاهْجُرُوهُنَّ فِي الْمَضَاجِعِ) (النساء:34). والله تعالى أعلم.
quote:Originally posted by newcomer: if you insist on doing more than this you are making your own rules in the religion and you are not submitting to Allah.
LOL! Are you aware of what you just said? Posts: 1039 | Registered: Jun 2007
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هجر فراش زوجته وتفرغ للصيام والقيام فماذا كانت النتيجة ؟؟
جاءت امرأة إلى عمر بن الخطاب رضي الله عنه في مجلسه فقالت : يا أمير المؤمنين ، إن زوجي يصوم النهار ويقوم الليل 0 فقال عمر : نعم الرجل زوجك إذا 0 وكان في مجلسه كعب فقال : يا أمير المؤمنين إنها شاكية ، تشكو مباعدة زوجها 0 فقال عمر لكعب : مادمت قد فهمت شكواها فاقض بينها وبين زوجها 0 فأرسل في طلب زوجها ، فلما جاء الرجل قال لـه كعب : إن امرأتك ما شكت من قلة طعام ، أو كساء وإنما تشكو مباعدتك إياها في فراشك 0 فقالت المرأة : أيهـا القاضــي الحكيــم أنشــــده ألهى حليلي عن فراشي مسجده ونهــاره وليلــه لا يــرقــــده فلست في أمر النساء أحمده فلما سمع الزوج كلامها قال : زهدني في فرشها وفي الحلل أني امرؤ أذهلني ما قد نـــزل في سورة النمل وفي السبع الطول وفــي كتـاب الله تخــويف يـجـــــل فلما انتهى الزوج من كلامه ، أجابه كعب على البديهة : إن لهـا حقا عليـك لـم يــزل في أربع نصيبها لمن عقـل فأعطها ذك ودع عنك العلل ثم قال لقد أحل الله أن تتزوج مثنى وثلاث ورباع فلك ثلاثة أيام بلياليها ، ولزوجتك يوم بليلته 0 فقال عمر رضي الله عنه : والله ما أدري من أيكم أعجب ، أمن كلامها وحسن توريتها ، أم من فهمك لما أرادت ، أم من حكمك بينهما اذهب يا كعب فقد وليتك قضاء البصرة 0
هذه حكاية امرأة بسيطة عاشت في صدر الإسلام الأول ، لم تتلق دروسا في الحرية والمساواة والمطالبة بحقوقها على أيدي الكفار في دول الغرب ومع ذلك تقف بكل جرأة أمام أعلى سلطة في الدولة لتشتكي زوجها الذي انشغل عنها بالعبادة وليس بشيئ آخر 0
فأي امرأة من نساء هذا العصر المتحررات والمتعلمات تستطيع أن تذهب إلى القاضي أو الحاكم أو ألأمير أو حتى تعين محاميا لاستعادة زوجها الذي انشغل عنها بالسفر والسهر مع الأصدقاء وارتكاب المحرمات 0 أنها بالتأكيد لن تتنازل بسبب غرورها وليس حيائها ستأخذها العزة بالإثم أن تطالب زوجها بالعودة إلى سكنه ، ولكنها لن تتردد في اتخاذ الأخلاء والأصدقاء لتمارس معهم المحرمات 0
وهذا الواقع تؤكده الكثير من جرائم الخيانة الزوجية التي تنجم عن ابتعاد الزوج عن معاشرة زوجته إما بسبب الخلافات بينهما ، أو انشغاله عنها بالمحرمات والسفر وقضاء أغلب أوقاته مع الأصدقاء 0
إن الكثير من بنات ونساء هذا الزمن لديهن جرأة كبيرة لا شك في ذلك ولكنها جرأة في اتخاذ الأخلاء والأصدقاء والاختلاط بغير المحارم والتخلي عن الحجاب الإسلامي 00 وهي باختصار جرأة على الله 0 وليست في الأمر بالمعروف والنهي عن المنكر بل أن بعضهن لا تجرأ على أن تقول لمن يتحرش بها ويؤذيها بالكلمات أو الحركات " اتق الله " 0 قال تبارك وتعالى : {كُنتُمْ خَيْرَ أُمَّةٍ أُخْرِجَتْ لِلنَّاسِ تَأْمُرُونَ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ وَتَنْهَوْنَ عَنِ الْمُنكَرِ وَتُؤْمِنُونَ بِاللّهِ وَلَوْ آمَنَ أَهْلُ الْكِتَابِ لَكَانَ خَيْراً لَّهُم مِّنْهُمُ الْمُؤْمِنُونَ وَأَكْثَرُهُمُ الْفَاسِقُونَ}آل عمران110
فما رأيكم إخواني الأعزاء .. أخواتي الكريمات في مطالبة الزوجة بعودة زوجها إلى بيت الطاعة إن صح التعبير والذي هجر فراش الزوجية لأي سبب !!؟؟ وهل ترون أن ذلك مقبولا من الناحية الاجتماعيا ؟؟ وما هو موقفكم في حال رفعت أختك أو ابنتك دعوى للسلطات المسئولة للمطالبة بحقها الشرعي في معاشرة زوجها ؟؟
"It has been made permissible for you the night preceding fasting to go to your wife [for sexual relations]"
1) The night preceding fasting would mean what? "The night BEFORE fasting", Is that before the 1st day of fasting, or any day of fasting? It's not specific.
2) It did not say "entire month" of Ramadan.
3) No guideliness for woman.
4) "for sexual relations", sexual relation to a woman doesn't necessarily mean having sex.
5) "go to your wife" did not specify in what circumstances. Is it because the wife asks for it thus "go to your wife" as to please her ? Or is it "go to your wife" and made love to her ( if she wants, if you want, if both of you want, if nobody wants... no specifics at all. )
6) Also it did not say "let the wife go to you" Huge difference.
I can only understand this as if woman wants it, then to a man is permissable ( to go to your wife ) 1 night before the actual 1st day of Ramadan, but in no way to say that people can simply have sex entire month of Ramadan. Apsolutelly not, because this would beat the whole purpose of fasting.
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D demanded. هبة قطب أستاذة الطب الجنسي والشرعي بجامعة القاهرة الأزواج بعدم الانقطاع عن العلاقة الحميمة في رمضان بحجة إفراد الشهر كاملا بأيامه ولياليه بالعبادة، مؤكدة أن ممارسة الجنس بين الزوجين في وقت الإباحة صدقة مضاعفة الأجر. Heba Qutb professor of medicine and forensic sexual Cairo University couples not to drop intimate relationship in the month of Ramadan ground personnel fully بايامه nights and worshiping, stressing that sex between spouses in the time permitted for charity double pay.
وأكدت د. She d. هبة وهي أول طبيبة عربية تتخصص في أمور العلاقات الجنسية أن أفضل أوقات الأداء الجنسي بعد صلاة التراويح. It is the first gift of Arab doctor specializes in matters of sexual relations that the best times of sexual performance after prayers التراويح.
وقالت لموقع"العربية نت ": لا رهبانية في الإسلام، وهذه مسألة محسومة بالقرآن الكريم والسنة النبوية. She said the site "Arab Net": No Sisters in Islam, an issue settled Holy Koran and the Prophet year. النفس البشرية لا تصبر، ويرى بعض الفقهاء ذلك من تمام العبادة، فالرجل عندما يأتي زوجته يؤجر أجر صدقة، ومن ثم فالأجر مضاعف في رمضان. The human psyche is not patient, and the view of some scholars that fully worship, the man came when his wife lets pay Zakat, and hence wage multiplier Ramadan.
بروتوكول الجنس في رمضان Protocol sex in Ramadan
وأوضحت أن بروتوكول العلاقة الجنسية في رمضان، يبدأ أولا من الالتزام بالمواعيد المباح فيها ذلك وهي من أذان المغرب إلى أذان الفجر، أي من الإفطار إلى الإمساك، والعلاقة الجنسية بين الزوجين مستحبة جدًّا في هذه الفترة حتى لا ينقطع الود بينهما طوال الشهر بحجة تخصيص ليله للعبادة فقط. The protocol sexual relationship in Ramadan, starts first of timeliness permissible where it is the ears of Morocco to the ears of dawn, from breakfast to grasp, and the sexual relationship between the couple very welcome in this period so as not to drop cordiality between them throughout the month pretext allocation night of worship only.
وأضافت أن هناك شكوى من الطرفين بامتناع الطرف الآخر عن ممارسة الجنس في رمضان اعتقادًا أن ذلك تقرّبٌ من الله، وأنا أرى أنه فهم خاطئ يؤثر سلبا على علاقة الزوجين وعلى حبهما أيضا للعبادة، فنحن لا نريد أن يتململ الناس من رمضان إحساسًا منهم بأنه يمنع شهواتهم الطبيعية كأن تعتاد المرأة أن يبتعد عنها زوجها في هذا الشهر فتبدأ عندها مرحلة القلق كلما اقترب دخوله. There were complaints from the parties excluding the other party from having sex in the belief that this Ramadan closer to God, and I believe it wrong understanding adversely affect the relationship of the couple and also the ages of worship, we do not want to يتململ people of Ramadan sense that prevents them natural شهواتهم The women learn that away from her husband this month, then begin a concern whenever approached him.
وتساءلت: ما دام القرآن والسنة حللا اللقاء الجنسي بعد أذان المغرب، فلماذا نسعى إلى تقييده. She wondered: Since the Koran and the Sunna analyzed after meeting sexual ears Morocco, why seek to restrict. نريد أن يظل الناس على حبهم لرمضان، معززين هذا الحب بالأفعال والتصرفات. We want to keep people on the love of Ramadan, enhanced this love in deeds and behavior.
الممارسة الجنسية أثناء الاعتكاف Sex during retreat
وبالنسبة لأيام الاعتكاف في العشر الأواخر من رمضان والتي ينقطع فيها الزوجان عن العلاقة الجنسية أوضحت د. For ten days retreat in الاواخر of Ramadan, which interrupted the couple on the sexual relationship d explained. هبة قطب: الجهاز العصبي يقوم ببرمجة نشاط الجسم الجنسي عند الزوجين في أيام الاعتكاف على عدم الممارسة، وبالتالي لا يشعر أي منهما بالحرمان. Heba Qutb: nervous system based programming object sexual activity in the days when couples retreat not to practice, and therefore does not feel any deprivation of them.
وضربت مثلا بالصيام عن الطعام والشراب في النهار، فالإحساس بالجوع والعطش يكون أقل بعد التعود على ذلك بسبب ما يقوم به الجهاز العصبي من برمجة، بينما الإنسان لو تأخر غداءه مثلا في غير رمضان لشعر بالجوع الشديد. For example, fast from food and drink in daylight, Relief hunger and thirst after less familiarity with it because of the nervous system of programming, while rights if the road was delayed for example, in non-Ramadan great hunger for poetry.
وأشارت د. She d. هبة إلى أن المشاكل الجنسية في رمضان لا تزيد عنها في غير رمضان، لأن الناس يشعرون أنهم أقرب إلى الله وإلى التصرف بحكمة وعقلانية نحو حل مشاكلهم. Gift to the problems of nationality in Ramadan only in the non-Ramadan, because people feel they are closer to God and to act with wisdom and rationality towards solving their problems.
وضربت أمثلة بنوعية هذه المشاكل الجنسية الرمضانية، مثل شكوى الزوجة من هجر زوجها لها في رمضان وانقطاعه للعبادة، أو رفض الزوجة لقاء زوجها في ليل رمضان بدعوى أنه يجب تأجيله إلى بعد انقضاء رمضان إكرامًا له وحرصًا على تخصيصه للعبادة فقط، بل إنها ترفض حتى تقبيله لها، معتبرة أن القبلة تفطر، مع أن الرسول صلى الله عليه وسلم كان يقبِّل وهو صائم. Examples and quality of these problems nationality Ramadan, such as a complaint from the wife deserted her husband in Ramadan and disconnection of worship, or the wife refused to meet with her husband in the night of Ramadan grounds that it must be postponed to after Ramadan sake and the sake of it earmarked for worship, but it refuses to even 569 , arguing that Kiss wrenching, with the Prophet peace be upon him had accepted a صاءم.
وأضافت: لا مشكلة في التقبيل في نهار رمضان إذا علم الزوجان بأنهما يستطيعان أن يملكا نفسيهما ولا تتطور الأمور إلى أكثر من ذلك، لكن ما دام اللقاء الجنسي مسموحا به بعد الإفطار فمن الأفضل تأخير المقدمات القوية إلى بعد الإفطار للابتعاد عن الإثارة التي قد تؤدي إلى ما يبطل الصوم. She added: Kissing is not a problem in the day of Ramadan if he knew the couple that they can not develop themselves يملكا things more, but as long as the meeting sexual allowed after breakfast, it would be preferable to delay introductions strong after breakfast away from sensationalism, which may lead to nullifies fasting.
وعن الوقت المثالي لممارسة الجنس بعد الإفطار قالت د. And the ideal time for sex after breakfast d said. هبة قطب: لا توجد أضرار صحية للممارسة بعد الإفطار مباشرة، لكن الأداء لن يكون جيدا، وإن كان ذلك يتوقف على كمية الطعام ونوعيته على مائدة الإفطار. Heba Qutb: There is no damage to healthy exercise immediately after breakfast, but the performance will be good, although that depends on the quantity and quality of food on the breakfast table.
وأشارت إلى أنه لا يجب الفصل بين النشاط الجنسي وأي نشاط آخر ومن ضمن ذلك نشاط الجهاز الهضمي، فاللقاء الجنسي يحتاج لمجهود دورة دموية وتوافق عضلي عصبي. She pointed out that there must be separation between sexual activity and any other activity that activity is within the digestive system, held the sexual needs of effort bloody cycle agrees muscular nervous. الإنسان يحس بالخمول والكسل بعد تناول الإفطار، ومن ثم فإن الأداء الجنسي لا يكون سليما لعدم حدوث ضخ دماء بالشكل المطلوب لعملية جنسية ناجحة، بسبب إنهاك الجهاز الهضمي، خاصة إذا كانت العناصر الغذائية التي تناولها غير خفيفة. Rights improve inactivity and idleness after the breakfast, therefore, sexual performance is not sound for not pumping blood as a requirement for citizenship process successful, because of fatigue digestive system, especially if it dealt with nutrient-light.
متى يلتقي الزوجان ؟ When the couple meet?
وأوضحت: إذا أفطر الزوجان على عناصر غذائية خفيفة فيمكن لهما الممارسة بعد الإفطار بعشر دقائق، أما إذا كان الإفطار على المحشيات والمحمرات وغير ذلك من العناصر الدهنية الثقيلة، فهو يحتاج إلى عدد من الساعات لكي ترتاح المعدة ويتم الهضم، وهذا يختلف حسب نوعية الأكل، فكلما احتوى الإفطار على دهون أعلى كان الأداء الجنسي أسوأ لأنها تستغرق وقتا أطول في الهضم. She explained: "If افطر couple elements of food can be a light for them practice ten minutes after breakfast, but if the breakfast المحشيات and المحمرات and other elements fatty heavy, it requires a number of hours in order to comfort the stomach and digestion are, and this varies with the eating quality, the more breakfast included on the highest fat sexual performance was worse because they take longer in digestion.
والوقت المثالي للممارسة حسبما ترى د. The ideal time for exercise as it deems d. هبة بعد العودة من صلاة القيام، حيث يكون قد تم الهضم بصورة أكبر وارتاحت المعدة نتيجة المجهود البدني في تلك الصلاة. A donation after returning from a prayer, where digestion has been more satisfied stomach and the result of physical effort in those prayers.
وتنصح المقْبلين على الزواج بتأخير الزفاف إلى ما بعد رمضان بسبب احتياجهم إلى عدد مرات أداء أكثر في اليوم الواحد مع شهوة جنسية عالية، وهذا يلزمه مجهود لا يكفي معه فترة ما بعد الإفطار إلى الإمساك. And advises prospective marriage delay the wedding until after Ramadan because of their need to perform a number of times more per day with a high sexual lust, and this necessary effort is not enough with the post-breakfast to grasp.
posted
I disagree with Heba Qutb professor of medicine and forensic sexual Cairo University for couples.
She is trying to find the way how to have sex and not to effect fasting after.
If sex was meant to be allowed for entire month of Ramadan, then she would not have to find ways how to do it and when.
It would be perfectly arranged by itself.
But it's not.
I already gave explanation why I think having sex during the entire month of Ramadan would beat the whole purpose of fasting.
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ولكن ايضا هذة الزوجة لها من حقوق الكثير حتى في رمضان ولو ان العلاقة ممنوعه تماما في رمضان او حتى مكروهه لذكر الله عز وجل ذلك ..
ولكن الله تعالى قال في سورة البقره الايه 187 : (( أُحل لكم ليلة الصيام الرفث إلى نسائكم هُن لباسٌ لكم وأنتم لباسٌ لهن علم الله أنكم كنتم تختانون انفسكم فتاب عليكم وعفا عنكم فالآن باشروهن وابتغوا ما كتب الله لكم وكلوا واشربوا حتى يتبين لكم الخيط الابيض من الخيط الاسود من الفجر ثم أتموا الصيام الى اليل ولا تباشروهن وانتم عاكفون في المساجد تلك حدود الله فلا تقربوها كذلك يبين الله اياته للناس لعلهم يتقون )) صدق الله العظيم
هجر فراش الزوجية
زوجتي تهجر فراش الزوجية في شهر رمضان بحجة العبادة، والتقرب إلى الله تعالى فما حكم الدين في ذلك؟
هذه الزوجة آثمة؛ لأنها تعكر صفو الحياة الزوجية، وإذا كانت تريد أن تسمو بعبادتها لتتقرب إلى الله عز وجل بالامتناع عن تحقيق الغرائز أثناء رمضان فإننا نقول لها: اعلمي أن الله تعالى أحل المعاشرة الزوجية ليلا في رمضان. قال تعالى: {أحل لكم ليلة الصيام الرفث إلى نسائكم}. ولتعلم كل زوجة أنها إذا كانت تمتنع عن زوجها؛ لتخلص نفسها للعبادة طوال شهر رمضان من باب التقرب إلى الله ورغبة في الحصول على الدرجات العلا والفوز بأجر الصائمين، فإن العلاقة الزوجية قد جعلها الله تعالى لونا من ألوان القربات، قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم: “وفي بضع أحدكم صدقة” فقال الصحابة يا رسول الله: أيأتي أحدنا شهوته ويكون له فيها أجر؟. قال لهم: أرأيتم لو وضعها في حرام أكان عليه وزر؟ قالوا: نعم قال: فكذلك إن وضعها في حلال كان له أجر”. ولهذا نقول: ما دامت الزوجة تريد أن تتقرب إلى الله تعالى بالعبادة فإن العلاقات الزوجية تعتبر لونا من ألوان القربات إلى الله، وللإنسان أن يتقرب إلى الله بأنواع متعددة من أنواع الطاعات؛ لينال الفوز والسعادة في الدنيا والآخرة، والله أعلم
(and eat and drink until the white thread (light) of dawn appears to you distinct from the black thread (darkness of night), then complete your fast till the nightfall. ) Consequently, they were very delighted.'' Al-Bukhari reported this Hadith by Abu Ishaq who related that he heard Al-Bara' say, "When fasting Ramadan was ordained, Muslims used to refrain from sleeping with their wives the entire month, but some men used to deceive themselves. Allah revealed:
(Allah knows that you used to deceive yourselves, so He turned to you (accepted your repentance) and forgave you.)
`Ali bin Abu Talhah narrated that Ibn `Abbas said, "During the month of Ramadan, after Muslims would pray `Isha', they would not touch their women and food until the next night. Then some Muslims, including `Umar bin Al-Khattab, touched (had sex with) their wives and had some food during Ramadan after `Isha'. They complained to Allah's Messenger . Then Allah sent down:
(Allah knows that you used to deceive yourselves, so He turned to you (accepted your repentance) and forgave you. So now have sexual relations with them)'' This is the same narration that Al-`Awfi related from Ibn `Abbas.
Allah said:
[وَابْتَغُواْ مَا كَتَبَ اللَّهُ لَكُمْ]
(. ..and seek that which Allah has ordained for you (offspring),)
Abu Hurayrah, Ibn `Abbas, Anas, Shurayh Al-Qadi, Mujahid, `Ikrimah, Sa`id bin Jubayr, `Ata', Ar-Rabi` bin Anas, As-Suddi, Zayd bin Aslam, Hakam bin `Utbah, Muqatil bin Hayyan, Al-Hasan Al-Basri, Ad-Dahhak, Qatadah, and others said that this Ayah refers to having offspring. Qatadah said that the Ayah means, "Seek the permission that Allah has allowed for you.'' Sa`id narrated that Qatadah said,
posted
Nowhere it says "you can have sex entire month of Ramadan". I already gave couple of remarks on 2 of translations that some of you offered. And how many translations are you going to offer? 201?
I was given mind, body and soul unique to me to think, feel and use my intellect on my own. You too. You have a choice to 1) think or to 2) follow. I chose to think.
I am not stupid to do whatever anyone tells me and blindly follow. I don't copy and paste bunch of fragmented sentences with someone else's personal interpretation to make a point. I use my own mind to see what makes sense, and what doesn't, and I evaluate.
I know that personal interpretation may be personal and biased, thus I am not eager to jump in and say - yes! I know what makes sense out of sentence and what doesn't!
I am thinker on my own and I am given free will to chose the best for me to self - actualize myself in all levels. That's the whole point of religion, and I do not think that having sex during Ramadan serves you to learn self-discipline. If it does, good for you.
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posted
You are perfectly entitled to choose what you want to do and if you can find a husband who will agree to this, that is up to you and it is your choice that you are responsible for. However, this is your own personal interpretation of that verse from the Qur'an and the scholars of Islam have all interpreted this verse in a different way to you based on their knowledge of the Arabic language and the example set by the Prophet (peace be upon him) in his Sunnah.
And yes, I was perfectly aware of what I said above. Allah gave us the guidelines for ibadah and if we create our own rules in addition to or by changing His, we are saying that we think we know how we should worship Him better than He does.
Btw. that "bunch of fragmented sentences" was the Arabic version of the Qur'anic verse I quoted above and the tafsir of it from Ibn Kathir Posts: 4576 | From: Cairo | Registered: Jun 2002
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posted
You have to read to understand and learn from your own book what ever you Muslim or none after reading and learning you make choices no one know it all if you will be stupid to just say i wont do it because people say you need to do it just saying no because people say is actually is totally been blind and stupid as you refuse to read and understand the wisdom of the explanation its all logic i can see you pointed at us who trying to help as we stupied and blind follow and copy and past bunch of fragmented sentences to make point maybe you need to see for your self and read before u think because thinking and judging about things you don't know any thing about is totally stupid and blind follow ur own mind with no logic you cant make an argument about quran nor the hadis and el sa7ba Remember the core of Islam is Holy Quran And Hadis & Sona For prophet Mohamed any how may god light your pass every thing u can argue about and say what ever just dont expect us to stay and say yes when you trying to miss lead people regarding Islam
amr
-------------------- Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach him how to fish and you get rid of him all weekend. -- Zenna Schaffer Some folks are wise and some otherwise. -- Josh Billings Posts: 1499 | From: Dark Side of the Moon | Registered: Aug 2007
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posted
Ok then it's their personal interpretation against MINE. Scholars of Islam are not given authority to claim 100% accuracy. They may attempt to interpret something but we are talking about people whose interpretations are influenced by their own set of values, experiences, opinions and ideas, thus their interpretations in no means tells us that's excatly what Allah meant.
In Islam you are encouraged to think on your own.
Newcomer I think you are very new to Islam and you are thought by someone how to think and believe. I, in the other hand gained all my knowledge through personal connection with Allah, and real experience. I am born into Islamic religion in which all my family members as far as I can recall are born Muslims. I was encouraged to think, analyze and use common sense.
Nobody gave me bunch of fragmented sentences and without any explanations ordered me to believe. That's not what Islam is about.
I have graduated both Islamic and public elementary school attending them at the same time for 8 years. The point is how to have an argument that is common sense and convincing enough without having to copy and paste someone else interpretation.
The point is newcomer, how do you as individual with God given intellect interpret and understand what's common sense, and can you rely upon your God given abilities. Can you feel Allah?
Anyway, the worst thing you can do is to say "Allah said this and Allah said that". As you see in my posts I have never claimed Allah said anything as I am not in any way authorized to speak on His Behalf. You are in no way His Agent or authority to claim or represent anything on his behalf and judge anyones faith or loyalty.
I also read some of your other interpretations and you are totally off. You interpret things way more culturally than islamically.
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To each their own interpretation of the Words of God! And it is between YOU and GOD after all!
When we express our 'understanding' or 'interpretation' to those that never read , learned, studied, understood the Qur'an, it is better if we always mention that it is our interpretation, so that the people that are listening, understand that the Qur'an has many interpretations, and that as long as we are in PEACE with ourselves, at the end of the day that is what counts.
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, he would not be allowed to have sex with you during Ramadan any time after Fajr (which is about an hour before sunrise) until sunset even if you were married to him.
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