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Originally posted by Saladin:
As we all know, the husband of the Saudi TV Anchor who beat her up got only 6 months in jail.
What is more shocking is that she pardoned him!!
Read the story at: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/3866969.stm

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Saladin, as a frequent visitor of BBC.com, I read this story when it happened. It is unbelievable! I believe he had to serve the full term and actually years ago.

When you take your private life to the public level as a public figure, what kind of message do you send to the rest of the Saudi women with similar problems? pardon beaters? Forgiveness is a virtue, I admit, the proof of pure and loving heart. At least she did not get back to this creep and will sue for custody of her kids. Should we judge her actions harshly? I do not know, but maybe from the stand point of her society, she has already taken a brave move? It is still her private matter

The father of OUR Children...is FORGIVEN...whatever he does. And usually...it is vice-versa...in terms of forgiveness only.. not taking them back. There are exceptions of course.

So, in this case.. she already did a super great step for the women of Saudi by creating the awareness, and taking that part of her life public, with courage...but at the end of the day, she forgave the father of her children...

Most women in the Middle East do. ( Most)

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Originally posted by katrina:
Saladin, as a frequent visitor of BBC.com, I read this story when it happened. It is unbelievable! I believe he had to serve the full term and actually years ago.

When you take your private life to the public level as a public figure, what kind of message do you send to the rest of the Saudi women with similar problems? pardon beaters? Forgiveness is a virtue, I admit, the proof of pure and loving heart. At least she did not get back to this creep and will sue for custody of her kids. Should we judge her actions harshly? I do not know, but maybe from the stand point of her society, she has already taken a brave move? Maybe it is still her private matter. ??????

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Originally posted by Monica:
Very important fact on Middle Eastern/North African/Arab culture.

The father of OUR Children...is FORGIVEN...whatever he does. And usually...it is vice-versa...in terms of forgiveness only.. not taking them back. There are exceptions of course.

So, in this case.. she already did a super great step for the women of Saudi by creating the awareness, and taking that part of her life public, with courage...but at the end of the day, she forgave the father of her children...

Most women in the Middle East do. ( Most)

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I guess, if he beat her to death, there would not need to forgive. Father of her children.. abuser... If he were indeed that father, he would not have beaten her... I cannot call him "father", husband, etc. he is a criminal, enough said. regardless of culture...Such mentality actually promotes further abuse and teaches kids exactly what? How about that?

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Originally posted by katrina:
I guess, if he beat her to death, there would not need to forgive. Father of her children.. abuser... If he were indeed that father, he would not have beaten her... I cannot call him "father", husband, etc. he is a criminal, enough said. regardless of culture...Such mentality actually promotes further abuse and teaches kids exactly what? How about that?

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Dear kate,

Remember we had pervious discussions on the concept of " negotiating power" and as Monica said, she probably has given up her right " power" to sue him in return of her children's custody.

We have also talked about how these communities especially in the gulf area are tribal communities. Therefore, whether to sue him or not is not a individualistic decision, it is more a communal one. Think about it from this perspective. This does not diminish the fact that he is a abuser and deserves the highest possible sentence.

Cheers

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Originally posted by kimo_the_maniac:
. She can't just base her decisions on sending messages to the public, screw the public.

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Originally posted by Mooly El Din:
Dear kate,

Remember we had pervious discussions on the concept of " negotiating power" and as Monica said, she probably has given up her right " power" to sue him in return of her children's custody.

We have also talked about how these communities especially in the gulf area are tribal communities. Therefore, whether to sue him or not is not a individualistic decision, it is more a communal one. Think about it from this perspective. This does not diminish the fact that he is a abuser and deserves the highest possible sentence.

Cheers

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Mooly, reading the article, I did suspect that she traded her right... I understand it as part of her rational decision under the circumstances and rules of the society she lives in, as you say. But simply forgive because he is still a father of her children, beats me, because guess what, he is not a good father and is not a good husband. The mentality that prevails otherwise, hell surely creates a vicious circle for this kind of problem.

Norms and conventions in our society shapes how we interact with each other, it gives us our unique character and defines the order of things. However, these norms and conventions can also bring down a great deal of harm onto an individual. This is when change needs to occur. Ms. Baz's photographs had planted the seeds of that change. It brought promise that no longer would domestic violence be swept under the rug. It brought the ugly face of a topic that so many people choose to ignore into our homes. It raised awareness and spurned discussions. These were the beginnings of change.

Of course there is a need to change a lot of ideologies in the community , to empower women, to eliminate social stigma and gender based violence. The need for social change is a Must. There is the need to exercise Rights, but rights are also related to the changing properties of political, cultural, values that have to do with dispositions of power in a given society. So in my opinion what is needed is not one single act against exercised violence, but rather a collective understanding of the right, which provide individuals with choice and hence possibility of diversity.

cheers