posted
Hi I've been an objective observer of this forum for quite a while now, but never really wanted to take part.
I just want to give a message to all these women that keep going on about meeting these egyptian men thinking they will be their love of their lives. I realise that i am only giving one perspective and you cannot generalise, but i would like to give a warning.
I have had a very loving relationship with a very western-type egyptian man here. We had an orfi marriage (although done by a sheik) although from very early on he wanted to marry me properly. I have lived here for three years (am English) but have never been keen on marrying anyone again in a hurry, even though his mother and him desperately wanted me to make commitment to him. He never needed to use me - i.e. wealthy family, good society members etc., but having learnt from bad past experiences i didn't want to rush anything.
After 8 months i discovered he was a heroin addict and then went into rehab. I got even more pressure then to stay with him, being the only one that could pull him through it according to his family and friends.
I have spent the past year having had many wonderful and then hideous times with him when he has relapsed. However, I stuck by the man cos i loved him truly. Then he totally sorted his life out - got a good job, got rid of bad acquaintances etc and i really thought that things would work out.
Then last weekend, after a minor argument on the phone, he decided (not on drugs - after drinking) that he would try and kick my door down, scale my building like spiderman and smash through my tiny bathroom window. Not only happy with doing this, he proceeded to puch me, then locked me inside my own flat, hiding my phone, keys, money etc. The only way i could try and get out was by shouting out the window. Through that, I managed to get him out but my landlord has chucked me out of the flat I dearly loved and lived alone in for 2 years.
What I'm trying to say is don't get mixed up in another culture so easily. These women that think they have met a 'perfect' man on holiday for two weeks, just wake up! I'm fed up of you writing stories on this site thinking you are so in love and crap like that.
No matter what you think, you can take the man out of Egypt but can never take Egypt out of the man.,
posted
I feel sorry for u, cause what happen to u..
And u are right, that women should be carefull ..do not trust everything.. And it is very difficoult to get ur marriage to work,if ur culture and religion is different..but it is not impossible..
I am lucky, we are doing fine with my egyptian husband. We also have many problems and difficoult choices to do..but our love is enough strong and deep. I think it help a lot,that my husband is older than i..he is ready for real love and family life.
posted
Yikes!! Sorry to hear your story... sounds like a real maniac. Of course, you find men like that the world over, not just Egypt. I do agree, however, that if you are far from your family/friends, it's even harder to deal with. I'm glad I met my fiance here in the states and then lived together with him here for about a year and a half. You're so right... knowing someone for two weeks or two months or just through the internet and then "giving up your life" for him is a bit fool-hardy (to say the least)!! Best wishes-stay safe.
quote:Originally posted by sphinxasis: Hi I've been an objective observer of this forum for quite a while now, but never really wanted to take part.
I just want to give a message to all these women that keep going on about meeting these egyptian men thinking they will be their love of their lives. I realise that i am only giving one perspective and you cannot generalise, but i would like to give a warning.
I have had a very loving relationship with a very western-type egyptian man here. We had an orfi marriage (although done by a sheik) although from very early on he wanted to marry me properly. I have lived here for three years (am English) but have never been keen on marrying anyone again in a hurry, even though his mother and him desperately wanted me to make commitment to him. He never needed to use me - i.e. wealthy family, good society members etc., but having learnt from bad past experiences i didn't want to rush anything.
After 8 months i discovered he was a heroin addict and then went into rehab. I got even more pressure then to stay with him, being the only one that could pull him through it according to his family and friends.
I have spent the past year having had many wonderful and then hideous times with him when he has relapsed. However, I stuck by the man cos i loved him truly. Then he totally sorted his life out - got a good job, got rid of bad acquaintances etc and i really thought that things would work out.
Then last weekend, after a minor argument on the phone, he decided (not on drugs - after drinking) that he would try and kick my door down, scale my building like spiderman and smash through my tiny bathroom window. Not only happy with doing this, he proceeded to puch me, then locked me inside my own flat, hiding my phone, keys, money etc. The only way i could try and get out was by shouting out the window. Through that, I managed to get him out but my landlord has chucked me out of the flat I dearly loved and lived alone in for 2 years.
What I'm trying to say is don't get mixed up in another culture so easily. These women that think they have met a 'perfect' man on holiday for two weeks, just wake up! I'm fed up of you writing stories on this site thinking you are so in love and crap like that.
No matter what you think, you can take the man out of Egypt but can never take Egypt out of the man.,
posted
Sphinxasis, please get the hell out of Egypt and start your life all over. Women believe they truly love a man, they give everything and put themselves last, if he is an addict they feel they are chosen to help him over everything. But its a wrong thought and all what you get is getting kicked in the end. You need to come to terms with this relationship, its over, its painful - but don't give up on yourself. You are a strong woman. Good luck.
[This message has been edited by Tigerlily (edited 01 June 2005).]
Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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What I'm trying to say is don't get mixed up in another culture so easily. These women that think they have met a 'perfect' man on holiday for two weeks, just wake up! I'm fed up of you writing stories on this site thinking you are so in love and crap like that.
No matter what you think, you can take the man out of Egypt but can never take Egypt out of the man.,
Don't lose everything you have too
Sphinx..I am very sorry to hear yor story.... and I agree with you. Everyday here in Hurghada you can hear the words "my man's different!" They hear the stories and choose to disbelieve them... all thinking they have found Mr. Wonderful! Egyptian men are very charming, and verrrrry convincing..and, unfortunately, very decietful!! I work with men like this... and many of them are proud of what they do with women! "This week.. My German wife is coming and bringing me a laptop computer....next week my Swiss wife is coming and bringing me a...... yes, she's old, and not good looking, but I f*** her for a week and she gives me everything!! etc. etc." Ok.... shoot me down for generalisng.... maybe it's the industry I'm in... and I know some women have found a good man.. but few and far between!!
Ladies.... please don't be in such a hurry to commit!!! There are also many non-Egyptian very unhappy women in Hurghada with small brown babies!!! Take care!!!
posted
Ouch, Samia, some people could think this was a racist comment but I doubt that. The little Egyptian kiddies are so cute. Would love to had one myself if I would have found the right guy. Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Samia: Babies of Egyptian 'husbands'.... women minus husband!!!
and is that what they call egyptian babies nowadays? "brown babies"? you're right tigerlily this is a racist comment. i dont know samia much, but from her posts she seems like a nice person. so i was surprised she would say such a thing. i'm sure she doesnt mean it. but please samia dont use it again, its not nice.
Posts: 4446 | From: Egyptian in Sydney | Registered: Mar 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Samia: Sphinx..I am very sorry to hear yor story.... and I agree with you. Everyday here in Hurghada you can hear the words "my man's different!" They hear the stories and choose to disbelieve them... all thinking they have found Mr. Wonderful! Egyptian men are very charming, and verrrrry convincing..and, unfortunately, very decietful!! I work with men like this... and many of them are proud of what they do with women! "This week.. My German wife is coming and bringing me a laptop computer....next week my Swiss wife is coming and bringing me a...... yes, she's old, and not good looking, but I f*** her for a week and she gives me everything!! etc. etc." Ok.... shoot me down for generalisng.... maybe it's the industry I'm in... and I know some women have found a good man.. but few and far between!!
Ladies.... please don't be in such a hurry to commit!!! There are also many non-Egyptian very unhappy women in Hurghada with small brown babies!!! Take care!!!
It must be some kind of unknown genetic stuff which make us Egyptian men naturally decietful? or could it be the side effects of eating much fuul?
What's funny is that the same geenralizing happen the opposit way from those same men when they call british or western woman as .... you know, but both sides don't represent anything, as a tourist you get to meet few Egyptians and most of them are the ones who left their cities to find work in those places, so they are into business and ethics of business are very down in the whole world whether between Egyptians or non Egyptians. I have worked with Americans and British people and it's no different when it comes to business, many lie. Hurghada, sharm or whatever are business places where you meet people who gain money by living with tourists but most Egyptians got nothing to do with this industry and it's unfair to speak of them in such nasty way just because of self-experince, unless you don't mind the generalizing when it happen the other way as well?
quote:Originally posted by Serendipity: hehe and my exam is tomorrow shoft il hana ili ana fi
mine is tomorrow as well! I thought I'm kinda weird myself, good not to be alone bas bardo ya3ny enta bent we 3andik 7al tani, tegawezy we to'3ody fe il bait
quote:Originally posted by Troubles101: mine is tomorrow as well! I thought I'm kinda weird myself, good not to be alone bas bardo ya3ny enta bent we 3andik 7al tani, tegawezy we to'3ody fe il bait
heeeey! me sitting at home! poor husband..he would have to eat macaroni for breakfast, lunch and dinner! No its better for me to be a doctor..at least i wont poison anyone with my cooking Good luck tomorrow, and do like me whenever you get a bit weird write something here latin, english arabic...whatever gets in your mind. like talking to mr chinese dude f.ex
quote:Originally posted by Serendipity: heeeey! me sitting at home! poor husband..he would have to eat macaroni for breakfast, lunch and dinner! No its better for me to be a doctor..at least i wont poison anyone with my cooking Good luck tomorrow, and do like me whenever you get a bit weird write something here latin, english arabic...whatever gets in your mind. like talking to mr chinese dude f.ex
ya3ni howa hyakol 7aga ghairha lama teshtaghali? kwaiss enno hiaykol, fe zawgat tanya teshtaghal we tseeb il rigala takol fi nafsaha
quote:Originally posted by Troubles101: ya3ni howa hyakol 7aga ghairha lama teshtaghali? kwaiss enno hiaykol, fe zawgat tanya teshtaghal we tseeb il rigala takol fi nafsaha
hehe .. we women has got the power! tab ma hoa momkin yakol 3and abo shaqra 3ando fol we ta3mya, we sandwich we kooool 7aga we are in the modern world now.. the hardest work for you is to open the box and take out the pizza and put it in the oven. tada! pizza ready to eat.
takol fi nafsaha? ya3ni cannibals? ya lahwy! la2 la2 maysa7ish keda..we will serve some salt and chillisaus for them so it will taste better
quote:Originally posted by Serendipity: hehe .. we women has got the power! tab ma hoa momkin yakol 3and abo shaqra 3ando fol we ta3mya, we sandwich we kooool 7aga we are in the modern world now.. the hardest work for you is to open the box and take out the pizza and put it in the oven. tada! pizza ready to eat.
takol fi nafsaha? ya3ni cannibals? ya lahwy! la2 la2 maysa7ish keda..we will serve some salt and chillisaus for them so it will taste better
we howa il ragil yegawiz 3ashan fe il akhir yero7 abo shaqra wala abo samra? mish kida we bass, da kaman mish hayshoof mirato illa akhir innahar rag3a ta3bana we zah'ana kol youm, sha3raha mankoush we sikinit il matbakh 3alatool fe ideha ma3 inniha mabtitbokhshi aslan, we ba3deen tegeeb dastit atfal 3ashan torbotoh we mayfta7sh bo'oh khalis, we izza te3b we 7ab yekhlas minha, ya welo ya zalam lelo, takhod mino il 7aq we il mosta7aq wel mestakhabi wel nafaqah wel shaqah we akhrito masa7ah nafsyah. da meen il magnoon da illy yegawiz
posted
While I can understand you being frustrated with the holiday romances on here (by the way, it's been like this here for years... sucker born every minute as that old worn out saying goes)... I don't really think your story has anything to do with him being "Egyptian."
He simply sounds like an addict and nothing in your post suggests his problems have anything to do with his nationality or his culture. So bag on him, bag on drugs, but what does his nationality to do with it?
quote:Originally posted by Serendipity: hehe .. we women has got the power! tab ma hoa momkin yakol 3and abo shaqra 3ando fol we ta3mya, we sandwich we kooool 7aga we are in the modern world now.. the hardest work for you is to open the box and take out the pizza and put it in the oven. tada! pizza ready to eat.
takol fi nafsaha? ya3ni cannibals? ya lahwy! la2 la2 maysa7ish keda..we will serve some salt and chillisaus for them so it will taste better
Posts: 1706 | From: Dallas, Texas, USA | Registered: Nov 2004
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posted
Salam everyone, I have had many of life's experiences in my Egypt, both good and bad. I fell in love with the people and the culture during my first visit in Feb 1997, 51 yrs old at the time, took a beautiful Nile cruise, thought I fell in love with a young man on the boat who never promised marriage. My second visit in that same year I was in Edfu the morning of the killings at Valley of Queens, having walked in the very spot of murders the previous morning. I saw men all around me cry after hearing the news. The majority are not murderers or crazy extremists but are just like the rest of us, trying to make a decent living. Unfortunately, female tourists run into young men who are not making much money, who have watched Western movies and rock videos, and are out to score big. The men in resorts have contests going on between themselves. They make points and money by scoring foreign women, the 'grandmother award' being quite high. They broadcast which person they will be trying for and their peers observe every move! But that is not the majority of the Egyptian population either. You see, the good ones have wonderful families, work hard, hope to get educated, and we never meet them. They are taken by their Egyptian women and stay taken. I moved to Egypt in June 2002 with every intention of staying there and finding a husband. Oh my, I was an idiot for the first 18 months. I had been married to the same man for 35 yrs, got divorced, and was in a big 'change of life' in every possible way. I had my heart broken half a dozen times and broke a couple myself. I lived in Alex, Mansoura, and then Cairo. I do not live with x-pats but always chose Egyptian neighborhoods. I have made the most wonderful Egyptian friends. Last summer and fall I became seriously ill and was forced to return to the States. During my second illness, I went to the Naser Institute and was hospitalized for 12 days receiving around the clock IVs. I was never allowed to see the bill because two of my closest Egyptian friends paid every LE of the bill. I also suffered from a terrible infection in my nose and developed a huge abcess which required a surgery in September last year. The doctor arranged for an MRI, operating room, etc. once again I never saw a bill. Alhamduleleh. The doctor offered his services free of charge because I am alone with no husband and he is a good friend of good friends. That kind of generousity is practically non-existant in the USA. So a heroin addict won't be very reliable no matter what country he's in. I can be murdered here in Florida for absolutely no reason, never mind the person having a 'cause'. What I am trying to say is that we are all human beings, we have basically the same instincts, we want a better life for our kids, we adore our grandchildren. And brown babies are beautiful. Yes our skin colors are different shades. Why is saying it racist? I have a wonderful friend in my life and when we put our hands together and observe the color difference we smile. I am living for the day I can return to my Egypt.
quote:Originally posted by sphinxasis: Hi I've been an objective observer of this forum for quite a while now, but never really wanted to take part.
I just want to give a message to all these women that keep going on about meeting these egyptian men thinking they will be their love of their lives. I realise that i am only giving one perspective and you cannot generalise, but i would like to give a warning.
I have had a very loving relationship with a very western-type egyptian man here. We had an orfi marriage (although done by a sheik) although from very early on he wanted to marry me properly. I have lived here for three years (am English) but have never been keen on marrying anyone again in a hurry, even though his mother and him desperately wanted me to make commitment to him. He never needed to use me - i.e. wealthy family, good society members etc., but having learnt from bad past experiences i didn't want to rush anything.
After 8 months i discovered he was a heroin addict and then went into rehab. I got even more pressure then to stay with him, being the only one that could pull him through it according to his family and friends.
I have spent the past year having had many wonderful and then hideous times with him when he has relapsed. However, I stuck by the man cos i loved him truly. Then he totally sorted his life out - got a good job, got rid of bad acquaintances etc and i really thought that things would work out.
Then last weekend, after a minor argument on the phone, he decided (not on drugs - after drinking) that he would try and kick my door down, scale my building like spiderman and smash through my tiny bathroom window. Not only happy with doing this, he proceeded to puch me, then locked me inside my own flat, hiding my phone, keys, money etc. The only way i could try and get out was by shouting out the window. Through that, I managed to get him out but my landlord has chucked me out of the flat I dearly loved and lived alone in for 2 years.
What I'm trying to say is don't get mixed up in another culture so easily. These women that think they have met a 'perfect' man on holiday for two weeks, just wake up! I'm fed up of you writing stories on this site thinking you are so in love and crap like that.
No matter what you think, you can take the man out of Egypt but can never take Egypt out of the man.,
posted
[QUOTE]Originally posted by aunti: [B]Salam everyone, I have had many of life's experiences in my Egypt I am living for the day I can return to my Egypt. -----------------------------
posted
Aunti, I agree with your post 100%. I hope your health improves and you will soon return to Egypt to be happy forever.
Ps. Egyptian culture has nothing to do with behavioral abnormalities of a crack head. To put it 'bluntly' : see the addict of any sort, steer as clear as you can girls. The number of cured by love is close to zilch. If someone is to be cured, he/she will be because it is their decision, not our will to make them be so.
[This message has been edited by Karah_Mia (edited 01 June 2005).]
posted
From My experience, I can say that not only the egyptian men of touristic areas are in this way but also the egyptian men are livingin Cairo or other city with little tourism. Yes, they are very able to sell dust, but behind all this there is only falsehood.
Never have trust in them please. man for man, is always better take a man of your country.
posted
[QUOTE]Originally posted by aunti: [B]Salam everyone, I have had many of life's experiences in my Egypt, both good and bad. I fell in love with the people. I lived in Alex, Mansoura, and then Cairo. I do not live with x-pats but always chose Egyptian neighborhoods. I have made the most wonderful Egyptian friends. I was never allowed to see the bill because two of my closest Egyptian friends paid every LE of the bill. I am living for the day I can return to my Egypt.
Thank you aunti, you are so honest, Egypt is waiting for you. Best wishes, Ibrahim.
quote:Originally posted by 7aya: and is that what they call egyptian babies nowadays? "brown babies"? you're right tigerlily this is a racist comment. i dont know samia much, but from her posts she seems like a nice person. so i was surprised she would say such a thing. i'm sure she doesnt mean it. but please samia dont use it again, its not nice.
Sorry... wasn't meant as a racist comment... just as I would say a black person or white person! My point was there are too many women getting pregnant too quickly.. without getting to know their man first!! And I agree with Tiger... their big brown eyes could melt ice!!!
quote:Originally posted by Troubles101: we howa il ragil yegawiz 3ashan fe il akhir yero7 abo shaqra wala abo samra? mish kida we bass, da kaman mish hayshoof mirato illa akhir innahar rag3a ta3bana we zah'ana kol youm, sha3raha mankoush we sikinit il matbakh 3alatool fe ideha ma3 inniha mabtitbokhshi aslan, we ba3deen tegeeb dastit atfal 3ashan torbotoh we mayfta7sh bo'oh khalis, we izza te3b we 7ab yekhlas minha, ya welo ya zalam lelo, takhod mino il 7aq we il mosta7aq wel mestakhabi wel nafaqah wel shaqah we akhrito masa7ah nafsyah. da meen il magnoon da illy yegawiz
mmmm... its seems like you've got experience (good luck on your exam today)
posted
In the tourist busines no matter where you go there will be men like those. In Italy they do have the same problem. Many norwegian girls has gotten a broken heart cause of them. so in Spain, and in Portugal and in greece and in turkey and in tunisia.. etc. No matter where you will travel, there will be people who wants to take advantage of you, specially when youre kind and with a good heart. We shouldnt hate every man,just cause we had some bad experience with some of them. Seven, what you said is true, yes you will find bad guys also in cairo BUT you will find them also here in Norway, and In London and everywhere. If we are unlucky to get across men like that and get broken hearted we should learn from it and move on and try to be more carefull next time. This is not only for the men, its also for the women too. Posts: 2519 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
Serendipity - I agree. It seems that when people go on vacation they want to experience romance and fantasy. It happens everywhere just like when we're younger and we go away for spring break after high school and college. We expect to have fun and should realize that it is what it is. I guess some people just forget that and get convinced that it's the real thing.
[This message has been edited by Gail (edited 02 June 2005).]
posted
I hear the same stories every week, week in and week out but if I try and convince the women that they are on a hiding to nothing (and most of them are although there are a few exceptions) then I am told that I am Egypt bashing. Every woman who has had a relationship in Egypt is with the one honest man there - but realy they know that they are not. It is far more comfortable for them to place their head in the sand than face the cold harshness of reality.
Posts: 2235 | From: Jail | Registered: Jun 2004
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Thanks for the concern, but pleased to say I am not going to let this bad experience drive me out of the country. After a lot of effort this week I have found wonderful 'safe' flat with a great landlady to move into on Saturday. I also got offered another job this afternoon which I really wanted. I am certainly not going to let him get me down. Coincidentally, I do realise that there are men like him all over the world. The only reason I warned women from different cultures about egyptian men is that his response to what he did to me was because I was his 'wife' and that entitled him to do whatever he wanted to do to me in this country (that the police couldn't touch him etc) Also, i did not meet him in a tourist resort. I have been living in Cairo for many years and met him here. I suppose i felt very bitter about the experience after it happened and wanted to get it off my chest!! Incidentally, if you are married here to an egyptian, do the police ever stick up for the women in cases of domestic violence?
posted
I say that because those women should know better. We all know how some Egyptian men are and that it is unlikely to work out. Besides ,we all know most men don't want to raise the children of some other man, and much less a baby of another race.
So no brown babies for me!
[This message has been edited by vinoetu (edited 02 June 2005).]
posted
[QUOTE]Originally posted by vinoetu: [B]Well I don't want any brown babies.
I do want brown babies, but can not- he is blonde. perhaps, then , I will have to seek the assistance of a brown Egyptian hunk in the very near future?
quote:Originally posted by sphinxasis: Wow - what a response!
Thanks for the concern, but pleased to say I am not going to let this bad experience drive me out of the country. After a lot of effort this week I have found wonderful 'safe' flat with a great landlady to move into on Saturday. I also got offered another job this afternoon which I really wanted. I am certainly not going to let him get me down. Coincidentally, I do realise that there are men like him all over the world. The only reason I warned women from different cultures about egyptian men is that his response to what he did to me was because I was his 'wife' and that entitled him to do whatever he wanted to do to me in this country (that the police couldn't touch him etc) Also, i did not meet him in a tourist resort. I have been living in Cairo for many years and met him here. I suppose i felt very bitter about the experience after it happened and wanted to get it off my chest!! Incidentally, if you are married here to an egyptian, do the police ever stick up for the women in cases of domestic violence?
Great, that you are full of power and you are looking forward after that bad experience. But be careful, if he is that kind of troubled man he's not going to give up, he will try to find you.
Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by salama: [QUOTE]Originally posted by vinoetu: [B]Well I don't want any brown babies.
I do want brown babies, but can not- he is blonde. perhaps, then , I will have to seek the assistance of a brown Egyptian hunk in the very near future?
posted
Be aware, if you have an own child, you want more!
Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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posted
Sphinxaxis - from experience I would say that the police seldom act on behalf of the women in cases of domestic violence but this is not because they do not care. It is because they know that the majority of women will withdraw the complaint the next day and make all their efforts just a total waste of time and energy.
Posts: 2235 | From: Jail | Registered: Jun 2004
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UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!
and my exam is tomorrow 
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