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do you think the first impression you get of someone is important? some people say that the first impression is the most accurate, while others say that it can actually be very misleading. personally my first impression are always wrong. i met my best friend in the second year in university, she thought i was a nerd who wouldn't let her borrow her notes, and i thought she was arrogant because she was always talking about herself now we are best friends, although she definitly got the nerd part right, no denying that i did give her my notes though! we have a very famous saying in egypt "ma ma7aba el ba3d a3dawa" (friendship always follows hostility) anyway so how how important is the first impression to you?
Posts: 4446 | From: Egyptian in Sydney | Registered: Mar 2005
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Really it does base on your character and how your thinking is going, it does differ from one to other.
and as u said "ma ma7aba el ba3d a3dawa", thats really more happen nowdays
there are a ppl are clever to give u a bright impression at first meeting, but u will find later they are Empty, and not like u thought, other may show they are restricted or even R7'em, but they are not.
quote:Originally posted by 7aya: do you think the first impression you get of someone is important? some people say that the first impression is the most accurate, while others say that it can actually be very misleading. personally my first impression are always wrong. i met my best friend in the second year in university, she thought i was a nerd who wouldn't let her borrow her notes, and i thought she was arrogant because she was always talking about herself now we are best friends, although she definitly got the nerd part right, no denying that i did give her my notes though! we have a very famous saying in egypt "ma ma7aba el ba3d a3dawa" (friendship always follows hostility) anyway so how how important is the first impression to you?
Hmmm, I think my first impressions tend to be right (but not always). I just hope everyone keeps and open mind with people they've just met. This way, you could discover a gem of a person when you thought they were an old rock.
I mean, you never know when someone's having a really bad day the first time you meet them.
I do have a boss who lives by his first impressions, even when they are wrong, so this can unfairly prejudice him against a person forever. Bad reviews, bad assignments, you name it. Or the other way around -- he thinks the person is gold, when that person is the biggest goof-off in the office.
Posts: 8794 | From: 01-20-09 The End of an Error | Registered: Dec 2004
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for me, I am not so good at impressing people from the first time they meet me. so I think the first impression would not be that accurate. I think 7aya that it depends on the other person not you, some people just need time for their real personality (bad or good) to show up and some stay the same from the day one.
Posts: 149 | From: Cairo | Registered: Jul 2005
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I give the shitty first impressions unless I am trying to give a bad first impression, then I am shmashing!
I know that people do the dumbest things on first impressions. They are all tied up in knots when they first meet people, so I don't take alot of it seriously.
I wait 2 weeks and watch them interact with people, especially the people they have known for years. This is the best indicator.
Posts: 5744 | From: Minneapolis, Mn USA | Registered: Mar 2004
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I have been guilty of forming my opinions of people based on my first impression of them and in time i have often been proven wrong. I think the problem is that first impressions are usually based on superficial characteristics.. looks is a big one. But a lasting impression (to me) is made by the depth and quality of a persons character... something you often can not see when you first meet a person and something that can not be faked for long.
BTW 7aya i just sent you an email.
[This message has been edited by Leila (edited 24 August 2005).]
Posts: 201 | From: Australia | Registered: Aug 2005
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I always judged ppl by my 1st impression, but I know I’m stupid; I can change it by days. By the way I dont like this deep relations, so I don’t care about this first impression or second impression toz y3ney. However, my 1st impression t some1 who want 2 propose is always right. 4 nege: ha 3ashn 2ntey fhmney 3`alet 3ltool, I don’t like deep relations, but 4 couples, it has 2 be very deep, u know deep relations in Egypt , it means no privacy, u have 2 mention every thing 2 the other side, and if u don’t it becomes something like treason, so I have my best friend and my familes and these are enough Posts: 968 | From: www | Registered: Aug 2005
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snoozin you mean if your boss gets a bad impression of someone, he will always dislike them, no matter how nice they turn out to be? my god! so what do you think gives a good or a bad impression? the way you behave, dress, looks? how important are looks in a first impression? also how long do we need to really get to know someone? sonomod you say two weeks, but you know something i had this friend in uni, she was realllllly nice and friendly, and naturally we became very close. but 8 months later i disovered how nasty she is. 8 months! in egypt we say some people have bo3d nazr (can see ahead) and can tell if someone is nice or not not matter what the first impression is. leila i just got your email, thank you!
Posts: 4446 | From: Egyptian in Sydney | Registered: Mar 2005
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quote:Originally posted by 7aya: snoozin you mean if your boss gets a bad impression of someone, he will always dislike them, no matter how nice they turn out to be? my god! so what do you think gives a good or a bad impression? the way you behave, dress, looks? how important are looks in a first impression? also how long do we need to really get to know someone? sonomod you say two weeks, but you know something i had this friend in uni, she was realllllly nice and friendly, and naturally we became very close. but 8 months later i disovered how nasty she is. 8 months! in egypt we say some people have bo3d nazr (can see ahead) and can tell if someone is nice or not not matter what the first impression is. leila i just got your email, thank you!
Yep, that's exactly what I mean about my boss.
I don't know how long is long enough. I don't get really emotionally invested in a friendship for quite some time....maybe a year or so.....so I do think that's enough time to find out someone's character. And everyone has bad/weak points. I don't really think there are that many really wicked people out there (maybe I'm naive).
I mean, I have friends who are gossips. You find out, maybe you're hurt a bit or embarassed by what got leaked, then you know not to trust that particular individual with your secrets. That, thank goodness, is about the worst type of betrayal I've had by friends in years and years. And I hope, inshallah, that it stays that way.
Posts: 8794 | From: 01-20-09 The End of an Error | Registered: Dec 2004
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Any person is like a tea bag.You never know how strong h/she is until h/she gets into hot water
Posts: 715 | From: Egypt | Registered: Aug 2005
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I am really bad in first impressions. I dont know 7aya, you've met me so you be the judge But usually I hear that i look very arrogant Eventhough i never really am, i am just shy!
Posts: 2519 | Registered: Apr 2005
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Why u r edgy I didn t mean any bad thing, I mean you can t understand people well until you face a problem or a difficult situation or what ever with them then they will show the real face
[This message has been edited by doudd (edited 24 August 2005).]
quote:Originally posted by Serendipity: I am really bad in first impressions. I dont know 7aya, you've met me so you be the judge But usually I hear that i look very arrogant Eventhough i never really am, i am just shy!
That's interesting you mentioned the *arrogant* thing. There was a guy here at my job who was the most handsome man you have ever seen. The way our offices are set up, he had to pass through mine to go talk to another coworker who was a friend of his. He *never* said hello, how are you, nothing. So I thought he was arrogant. After all, he's handsome, an attorney, played semi-professional sport, had it all.
Turns out he was just shy. I felt so bad for thinking he was arrogant. That was my own lack of self-confidence showing through. And it's hard to think of somebody who has it all being shy! So now I never think of people who don't speak as arrogant, I assume they are shy until proven otherwise.
Posts: 8794 | From: 01-20-09 The End of an Error | Registered: Dec 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Serendipity: I am really bad in first impressions. I dont know 7aya, you've met me so you be the judge But usually I hear that i look very arrogant Eventhough i never really am, i am just shy!
hehe no i didn't think you were arrogant at all. actually in our first meeting i thought you were very shy! i thought why doens't sara talk like she does on ES?? but slowly you started to relax, but not arrogant at all. actually when you were talking about iraq your eyes watered a little and i thought you were going to cry. but then later i discovered that your eyes tend to water whenever you are talking about something you are passionate about. this is a very good quality. we have an egyptian actor called yehia el fakhrany who has the same thing, and its very nice! snoozin, i have this guy in my office, sits right next to me, who never says hello. i thought maybe he's arrogant but now after reading your post i'm starting to think maybe he is shy! he's american so maybe hes finding it difficult to blend in.
Posts: 4446 | From: Egyptian in Sydney | Registered: Mar 2005
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I totally neglect how I feel abt ppl the first time I meet them! I keep reminding myself that it's shallow, that I need more time to say what a person is all about, what he stands for! Sometimes it works But still, it's all about chemistry... some ppl click, some don't!!
I've had all sort of comments made after a first meeting. From witty, cunning, smart to boring, dull ..from fat to skinny and, well...ppl see what they want to see!!!! I gradually started to stop worrying abt ppl who like or dislike me based on 1st impressions...for wrong reasons mainly! Now, i give more weight to ppl who really know me , and like or dislike me for RIGHT reasons!!!!
Asoom...don't worry abt me! I fully understood what u said. How abt trying something new? "You set your own rules!!!" Yaani, meet ppl ..make as many acquaintances as u want. Draw the line, and right there they stop!!
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I was trying to make a first impression with someone. Trying to be graceful, sauve, and ran straight into a metal pole!!! Ended up with a black eye ...
Posts: 816 | From: On top of a dog house | Registered: Sep 2004
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quote:Originally posted by 7aya: do you think the first impression you get of someone is important? some people say that the first impression is the most accurate, while others say that it can actually be very misleading. personally my first impression are always wrong. i met my best friend in the second year in university, she thought i was a nerd who wouldn't let her borrow her notes, and i thought she was arrogant because she was always talking about herself now we are best friends, although she definitly got the nerd part right, no denying that i did give her my notes though! we have a very famous saying in egypt "ma ma7aba el ba3d a3dawa" (friendship always follows hostility) anyway so how how important is the first impression to you?
Dear 7aya if i would say it in a scientific terms. i would say your sub-consious have a great experince of ppl and situation and he saving it somewhere and recall it when he need. So when u meet someone the first impression u got is from your previous experince with other ppl. i mean for example his forehead have a lot of wrinkles and this feeling always connected with angry which make u hate him and in contrary if his face is similling that always connected with happy minutes so u like him. or may be his nose look like someone u hate or did something bad to u so u hate him. but all of that happend in your sub-consious in seconds and without u notice that.
Best Regards mohamed
[This message has been edited by MohdAnwar (edited 25 August 2005).]
posted
Come to think of it, I actually never cared for first impression. Its a bit hard to explain, but I just pressume that this person is good untill proven wrong like snoozin said.
Posts: 2519 | Registered: Apr 2005
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Mmmm,about first impression here in my country we have a famous words,ill try to translate it correct:By the cloths you meet,and by the mind u leave!Ya3nee... The first impression in our eyes is from what we see....maybe clothes,manners,way of talking...things like this,and after u know this person u can change this first impression!Especially if its wrong....coz always on the first meet the people act abnormal...they feel shy,or dont talk a lot,or talk too much,trying to show off themselves as they are not in real!Its even funny...!Rare u`ll find natural people,who expose themselve as they really are! 7aya i know what u mean,the first day i meetmy best friend i thought only bad things for her,that she show off herself coz her parents are rich...far more rich than we were by that time...and after that i realised that she is lovely person,and she is my best friend now! Posts: 1134 | From: NoNe oF uR BuSiNeS | Registered: Jul 2004
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You know diana and 7aya, the same thing happened to me and my bestfriend. we went to the same high school together. and we used to hate eachother! she would always get on my nerves and she always thought that I was arrogant. But one day we just sat down and talked and suddenly we found out that there is no need to kill each other. From that day the whole school knew that if I was walking around alone that meant i was looking for her and the same with her! that was the old days but still today we have managed not to strangle eachother Posts: 2519 | Registered: Apr 2005
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I have an intuitive nature that has yet to fail me. I give a person 5 minutes to make an impression, in this 5 minutes I can tell if they are shy, dishonest, outgoing, mean, sincere, serious- minded, etc. And I can see behind the social masks they wear. The eyes never lie.
And Mohamed is correct, frown lines, smile lines, mannerism, etc. tell you a lot about a person.
I once hired a young lady against my better instincts, everything about her on the interview made me uncomfortable, she could never make eye contact with me. Resume was impressive, others were impressed, so I went against my better judgement. Months later, we discovered she committed a lot of fraud, had lies on her resume, and almost cost us our business. I never went against my instincts again.
And although both barely make eye contact, there is a way to differentiate between a shy person and a dishonest person, just in the way they divert their eyes. Shyness is totally different from shame!
UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!
now we are best friends, although she definitly got the nerd part right, no denying that 
Eventhough i never really am, i am just shy!
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