From the devoutly religious to the seriously hedonistic, Egyptian youth are moving away from the middle. The winner is extremism, in all its forms.
By Nadine El Sayed
We have sex,” says 28-year-old Amina* when asked about her limits with her boyfriend.
“I don’t shake hands with guys,” says Doaa, a 22-year-old mother and student who decided to wear niqab at the age of 17.
Amina and Doaa, although close in age, both from upper-class backgrounds and moving in similar social circles, lead very different lifestyles.
(*Names have been changed to protect privacy.)
Amina’s days start off as she goes to work and end either hanging out with friends or clubbing the night away. Amina doesn’t stick to her curfew, but she does drink and smoke pot or hash, the substances she decided to stick with after trying “everything else.” Doaa’s day, on the other hand, revolves around taking care of her baby and going to the nadi (sports club) or visiting her parents — cafés are out of the question, she says, “because of the shisha, the things I see there and the music.”
While both might appear extreme on the surface, neither Doaa nor Amina are exceptions. Quite the opposite, in fact. Their divergent lifestyles are new norms among today’s ever-polarized youth, with moderates who once formed the middle ground systematically being pulled in one of two directions.
Mohamed Allouba Drinking and smoking up have become essentials to get the ‘party’ crowd started.
This divide is much sharper in the upper socio-economic classes than it is in the middle or lower strata. A social structure among the former that typically determined moderation as the dominant norm is eroding. Whether socio-cultural norms — imported or indigenous, from Western consumerism or post-migrant Wahabbism — are a tool of the rich or filtered ‘upward’ from lower and lower-middle classes (or all of the above), there is a distinctive transformation taking place among upper-class youth. Once the bastion of a so-called ‘middle ground,’ negotiating the space between religious conservatism and the wholesale assimilation of ‘Western’ values, they are now themselves defined by this dichotomy.
When looking at upper-class universities, clubs or social groupings, for example, it is hard not to notice that these privileged youth are increasingly divided into either the strictly religious or the ‘party kids’ — the ‘fundies’ or the ‘cool’ kids. One only has to stand on the streets to observe the contrast: girls wearing niqab driving expensive cars, trendy youth growing their beards, not shaking hands with the other sex, attending religious lessons, etc. Then there are those with the same educational and social background who veer in the opposite direction, choosing to lead a more open lifestyle, clubbing every night, drinking, smoking and having sex.
These two groups have little in common, and the middle ground between them is becoming wider and less populated.
Maha Abd El-Rahman, a professor of sociology at AUC, says youth have few alternative models to choose from — in fact there are only two available, she says.
“You have the religious project — a religious, cultural, economic and political project — and it is very attractive for a wide range of Egyptians, young people as well as old,” Abd El-Rahman explains. “This is because Egyptians are by nature very religious, understand the language of religion and sympathize with religious sentiments. On the other hand, you have the second extreme of people partying all night and drinking. [The latter] model is imported from the West and only the very upper members of the middle classes and upper classes engage in this lifestyle — it is a model of consumerism, of having fun.”
Mohamed Allouba What seems righteous enough for many isn’t doing the trick anymore for the ‘religious’ camp.
Abd El-Rahman is of the opinion that if youth had other alternatives, today’s social makeup would be completely different. “In a hypothetical, ideal society there would be different political programs and social projects going on and the young could be engaged in any of them — it’s not that Egyptian youth are uninterested in social and political issues, but for young people to realize what they are interested in, you have to provide them with options.”
The sociologist believes that this more open lifestyle is stereotypically associated with upper classes, while religious extremism isn’t. “What you’re describing as partying and drinking and having fun is, by necessity, associated with a certain socioeconomic level. You can’t go partying all night and drinking and dancing when you can’t afford it or when you have to wake up early in the morning to work at a factory. This trend is associated with the upper-middle class. However, extreme religiosity cuts across social classes; there is now religious consumerism for the poor as well as the rich.”
Hanging out with members of each clique, what becomes most apparent is not the sheer contrast between the divergent lifestyles, but that there seems to be no one standing between them.
Girls (and Boys) Just Wanna Have Fun
Mustafa, a 22-year-old student in his senior year at an A-class university, usually hangs out at a friend’s house “watching a movie and smoking” if he isn’t clubbing or partying. “If I am going to a party, I would leave the house at like 10 or 11pm and then if there is a free house we would go there before the party, pre-game. If not, we head straight to the party and drink there. I usually go home by 3am, unless the party is really good then I would stay longer,” he says.
Mohamed Allouba Although recreational drugs are not as popular among girls as they are among guys, drinking is a pastime shared by all.
Hala, a 22-year-old law student, gives an example of a big night out. “It was New Year’s Eve and we were going to a party with friends. The guys picked me up at 10 and we went and bought liquor because it was cheaper than the liquor sold [where the party was] and we wanted to get drunk before getting there. We got there drunk and then drank some more. We danced and drank all night long until 4am. [Later] we went to an after party at one of the guys’ villas and went home at 7am. It was one hell of a night.”
Although drugs don’t seem to be as popular among girls as they are among guys, drinking is a pastime shared by all. “I’ve drunk, smoked everything — weed, hash, skunk I tried E [ecstasy] once, but I have only done cocaine on my gums and teeth,” says Mustafa.
Hala explains that while she likes drinking and smoking, she didn’t like hashish. Shahira, a 21-year-old whose curfew extends to 3am, explains that while she isn’t into drugs, she drinks as much as she wants: “I can drink all night, I have no limits.” Mai, 22, likes drinking, smoking and doing drugs.
While sex isn’t an issue with most, males seem to leave it up to the girls to set the limits. Twenty-on-year-old Tamer, who openly smokes, drinks and does drugs, explains how the type of girl he dates sets his physical limits. He classifies girls from those you take seriously and never even date to those he labels “sluts” — those you can go as far as sleeping with.
Shahira explains that love can make her go “a bit far” with her boyfriend. “I mean he can touch me anywhere; we kiss, we touch, we hug, almost everything except losing my virginity. If this happens I want to lose it with the right guy.”
Mohamed Allouba The new breed of religious youth lead lives that revolve around their beliefs.
Yasmine says that when it comes to her boyfriend, she has no limits. “We have sex,” says the 21-year-old.
Nessreen, 18, is more comfortable talking about her homosexuality than she is talking about her use of drugs. “I am a lesbian. The first time I discovered it was when I was 15; before that I was neither attracted to men nor women. By 15, I started noticing women not men, but I was always very shy and so I started dating a year later. I have sex with my girlfriend; when I was 16 or 17, I went through that slutty phase where I was just coming into my sexuality and my hormones were all over the place. Now I am in a calmer phase where it would be nice [to be intimate], but I am not bothered.”
Innocence Lost
The surprise is not that upper-class youth indulge in sex, drinking and drugs — it’s that they are now starting so very young, and not necessarily behind their parents’ backs.
“I had my first drink when I was 14 and I did it because I wanted to try it. I wasn’t influenced by my friends. [] I smoked cigarettes when I was in eighth grade and [started] smoking up [hash] in the beginning of my senior year. I was at a party and my friend had it so I was like, ‘OK I’ll try it’,” says Mustafa, who lost his virginity at the age of 13. “My parents know that I drink,” he continues, “but they’ve given up on trying to make me stop. Now their only opposition is [to] drinking and driving.”
Tamer says his first experiment with drugs, at the age of 14, was caused by his devastation over a girl he liked. Amina started drinking at age 16, while Shahira started smoking at the age of 12 and took up drinking at 13.
And while some deny peer pressure, many associate their foray into the world of drugs and booze with the influence or encouragement of friends. Hala, who had her first drink at the age of 18, decided to try it because “all my friends were drinking, so I said ‘Why don’t I try?’ I drank a little, then I found myself so happy and hyper — that’s how I started.” While Hala’s mother can know about a boyfriend or cigarettes, her dad, on the other hand, isn’t told anything.
Shahira, whose parents know nothing about her lifestyle, tells her mother only about cigarettes or a boyfriend. She admits that she can’t control herself around her friends — she is bound to do what they do.
Hala agrees. “I am the kind of person who is affected by others, and now most of my friends are drinking and dancing the night away — so how can I not?” she asks.
Although Amina’s initiation was with her friends, and experimenting with drugs was encouraged because “everyone did it,” she maintains that it was her decision and she takes responsibility for it. Amina’s parents know “everything” she does, but can’t object because she’s “old enough.”
Rania’s first encounter with drugs, at the age of 14, was also with her friends, but she denies that her peers influence her as “each has his own lifestyle.”
Nessreen has tried ecstasy and marijuana with her friends. Her parents know about her homosexuality, drinking and drug use, but are less tolerant of it; she says that they are in denial over the issue of her (homo)sexuality. “They still have hopes that I’ll get married one day,” she adds with a sigh.
While many parents are completely ignorant of their kids’ behavior, many are in denial and others are fully aware. They may also be leading an open lifestyle and therefore not terribly alarmed — or they may be against their kids’ behavior but want to be the “cool” parents or console themselves with the belief that it’s a normal development phase. Those who actually don’t know or are turning a blind eye tend to fall into the category of busy or uninvolved parents, who perhaps spoil their kids to make up for it. Even upper-class stay-at-home mothers tend to keep a busy social schedule, which amounts to the same result — kids left alone with a lot of money.
Finding God
At the other end of the spectrum, kids who turn to religion also maintain they did not give in to peer pressure, despite the strong influence of their friends. Although Doaa believes that friends influence one another, she says she took the decision to wear the niqab alone. She does reveal, however, that she now hangs out more with girls who share her lifestyle and beliefs.
Ali Mahmoud, a financial analyst and consultant who transformed from clubber and partier into a devout Muslim, argues that his friends were an influence. “My friends were definitely very influential throughout my experience. Before, through peer pressure, “I tried a lot of things I shouldn’t have. I don’t blame my friends for what I did because each person is responsible for his actions.”
Both Mahmoud and Doaa are representative of a new breed of upper-class Muslim, attending more religious lessons, avoiding places where there is smoking or music and leading a life that revolves around — and is constrained by — their beliefs.
Coming from what he brands “a good Muslim family,” Mahmoud relates that he “was a very curious kid and when I [reached] the age of high school, I guess it was time for me to experiment. So I did just that and I went astray and tried and did everything that came [into] my mind. I had no control over myself; desire took over. And anyone that stood in my way, [I] automatically registered as a hurdle I had to overcome. I had no respect for anyone, I had been in many fights, made connections with bad people and gotten into a lot of trouble. Then I enrolled in Modern Sciences and Arts University (MSA) and lived by myself for the first year. I had a ball. Every day, I did what I pleased with no supervision.
“One day I got into an accident. I almost died. You know when they say your life flashes before your eyes? Well, that didn’t happen. It was more like my ‘afterlife’ flashed before my eyes. What was lying ahead suddenly became crystal clear. And I was scared! And for eight hours I was unconscious and tripping like crazy. It was a wake-up call.
“After this accident I was scared for like two months. I quit drinking and stopped a lot of the things I used to do. But then I started doing everything again. I did it even more frequently than before. Months went by and I got into another accident. This time I stayed unconscious for even longer. I was out for maybe three days. During these three days, I experienced hell! I was not looking at it from [a distance], but I was experiencing all the types of torture and suffering firsthand. I felt like I was actually being whipped, and burned, and hung and smashed. It was a horrific experience. It was a sign.
“I began reading the Qur’an and attending lectures so that I could explain what happened to me. This was the turning point in my life.”
The Other Side of the Fence
While many see such a polarized dichotomy as a trend among upper-middle-class youth, the two camps don’t seem to mind each other in the slightest. “My best friend is a very religious girl,” begins Hala. “I admit sometimes she bugs me about my lifestyle, but I can deal with those kinds of people and I think they are totally doing the right thing, no doubt, but I don’t like them at all when they interfere in others’ lives.”
Amina also has many conservative friends and has “no problems with them whatsoever and they have none with me. Everyone has the freedom to do as they please, no judgments.”
Rania, a drinker and an all-night partier, says she usually hangs out in a place that is convenient for the whole bunch — for those who want a drink and those who don’t. However, she can only tolerate religious friends who can accept her. “I do have friends that are religious, but they are the type that accept other people with their different habits. They are who they are and they don’t criticize my lifestyle or tell me what to do. They accept that I’m different or more liberated and they’re fine with it, they don’t force their beliefs on me. But I cannot handle people who are strict and too narrow-minded to accept different people. I accept different types of people and don’t judge someone just because they think differently. My friends [who] are religious, they have my respect — and throughout our conversations we avoid religion-related discussions.”
Yasmine, too, says she has to watch her behavior around her religiously conservative friends. “I tend to not drink or smoke while I am with them and they tend not to be into religion that much when I am there.”
And while the two parties can get along, they often choose to keep a distance — or are forced to keep one. Rania explains that although she has conservative friends, she doesn’t hang out with them often because they lead different lifestyles and so have different hangouts.
“I have a lot of friends who aren’t veiled and my mother isn’t veiled, but I can’t be close friends with people who drink, do drugs or have sex because they will definitely influence me,” explains Doaa.
Mahmoud also found his social network changing after he changed his lifestyle, “just because my interests and priorities have changed. It’s like when you have a friend who loves cars and all they talk about is cars, but you hate cars and don’t want to hear anything about them. Eventually you will move apart because there is nothing in common to share. This was the case.”
In Moderation
Although sex and drugs were not involved, Omneya Abdel Hamid, 23 and a mother of two, also led an ‘party’ lifestyle before turning to religion. “I am a graduate of CAC and I didn’t have any religious background. I had just graduated from school and I was in Marina in the summer of 2002 and everyone was getting veiled. There was a religious movement, and it just hit me that I never thought about doing something other than for myself, so I started reading a lot. I thought ‘I am going to do it [wear the veil] and see how it goes — if it isn’t what I expect, I am going to take it off; I am very flexible.’
“Then I bounced from extremes. At the beginning, it was something very strange to me and I didn’t know anything and I didn’t really know what is right and what is wrong. I didn’t have any friends who had done this before. For me it was really difficult because I come from a very different background, the total opposite — bikini-wearing, [etc], and it didn’t sound logical to me.
“At the end I realized that it’s not the right thing because obviously I can’t think like that. I can’t think that the whole society is wrong and everything is haram. Just the whole idea that everything becomes suddenly wrong and judging people or myself based on what they are wearing or what they look like — it becomes just a facade of religion. It isn’t all about looks, and it is so difficult and illogical to put a lot of pressure on yourself”
So, the question remains, what is moderation? As in the case of Abdel Hamid, there still exists a middle ground, although it is becoming less popular by the day. There are still youth who aren’t out partying — but who do keep a varied social life. There are people who can go to the occasional party, attend to their religious duties and maintain an open-minded or tolerant attitude toward difference. These people are usually engaged in non-religious social activities, and despite the pressure they receive from both extremes, manage to stand their ground.
Of all the people interviewed for this article, Abdel Hamid is the only one to have found this middle ground. “I became moderate. I don’t wear the same clothes and I don’t look the same, but I feel the same. I even feel better, like I am closer to God. There is a new side of me with God that no one has to know about or judge. I have to show Islam and portray the good side of Islam in a positive way, because a lot of people haven’t been doing so. Even to me, when it was all so new, what I saw I didn’t like. I was dragged into it and I was kind of brainwashed. But then I was like, ‘No, I don’t think Islam is like that.’ It is a lot easier and it is something that is universal and should be applicable everywhere.”
With more and more youth moving toward either extreme, the situation for those in the middle becomes difficult, and moderates are becoming increasingly marginalized, with few options to choose from. Abd El Rahman argues, “This is, of course, not to say that there are only two extremes and there is nothing in between; other young people engage, or try to engage, in alternatives, but it is hard.”
The solution seems simple, yet hard to apply: Give the youth something to be engaged in. Political and social organizations seem to attract many moderates, and extracurricular activities at universities tend to have many middle-ground students engaged in them. Such programs provide them with a productive way to spend their time and meet like-minded people. Unfortunately, these organizations or activities are not widespread, with few universities offering extracurricular activities.
One is troubled by a recurring question: If it is hard to stay in the middle, and alternatives are not supported, how long will it be until the middle disappears? et
posted
Very poorly written article in general, but I felt compelled to comment on some of the ludicrousness in it:
quote: “You have the religious project — a religious, cultural, economic and political project — and it is very attractive for a wide range of Egyptians, young people as well as old,” Abd El-Rahman explains. “This is because Egyptians are by nature very religious, understand the language of religion and sympathize with religious sentiments.
Wrong. Egyptians are not religious “by nature”. Egyptians are conformists by nature. The wide-spreading religious image that we are seeing in Egypt is nothing but a mirage. The truth is that the majority of the so-called religious are displaying what I call “religion for show”. When it comes to the principles of Islam, you will find that very few abide by. “Ildeen mo3amla” … ever heard that one before?
quote: The solution seems simple, yet hard to apply: Give the youth something to be engaged in. Political and social organizations seem to attract many moderates, and extracurricular activities at universities tend to have many middle-ground students engaged in them. Such programs provide them with a productive way to spend their time and meet like-minded people. Unfortunately, these organizations or activities are not widespread, with few universities offering extracurricular activities.
The statement above must have been either uttered by someone who was high or someone who has never spoken to a teenager in Egypt … From the absurdity of it, I am forced to assume it was both.
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