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Author Topic: Im not sure about him
Mariya
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I really like him, even thought i told him that i love him. But anyway there is a story. I met him the first day i came to egypt, i thought i would have some relationship when i would be in egypt but noway with EGYPTION, but anyway it happened. he was not like other egy man, he is so much like european, very handsome, beautiful man. the firs time that we were going out together he would pay for everything, he says г are with egy man г dont have to worry about money. okay good, but the 2nd week i was there he started not to have money, prolly i made a mistake oneday i paid for us in the caffee, but it was like 20 pound, nothin to me, but he didnt even asked me for that, ive done it myself. some time i just like to show man that i have money, that i can take care of myself and if needed also of him, i like to be independent. but then i start to pay for myself in the bus, cuz he was always speaking about his money problems, then some times i paid for both of us. he is saying that he loves me and that he wants to marry me, i didnt think he would lie to me or use me, but now reading all this stories i start to worry. he wants me to come in summer, which i want too, cuz i i love to country, but he also wants me to live with him, wants to reant apartment and live together but for that you have to do orfi, which i dont wanna do just when i come. so im thinking that i will go but im also planning on gettin a job so i would work in a place where they will provide me with a place where to live, may be this way i can check his reall ententions. but for now i dont know, its very sad cuz we are really having good time together, we have so much in common and i miss him so much now, we speak everyday, sms and email, but if its all fake it will be very bad, and i dont know should i go to live there or not, PLEASE GIVE ME AN ADVICE
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jesse
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Mariya,
i am an egyptian women and i know egyptian men well enough to tell you that this is 90% fake and if u dont mind me asking about where does he live , at what univerity did he graduate from , what does he do for living and what is his financial status from all of this info you will be able to see through a guy here in egypt.
jesse

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anthropos
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Hi Mariya,

I understand your dilemma. It is so difficult to try to understand someone from a far and who is of another culture and language. And all the doubts increase because it is difficult to trust someone with electronic propinquity only.

I don't know if he is being fake. I am somewhat going through the same situation and somedays are better than others.

This is the eternal battle between the mind and heart. Your heart says let's go and your mind keeps you back. Maybe it is time to give the heart a vacation and think this completely logically. I think that we both know to what conclusion you will come then. The problem is that we are told to listen to our heart - to follow it. But if your instinct is telling you something else? Or is it only the environment, your friends? family? this idiotic forum? and you need to stick to your feelings - the easiest thing in the world is to run away...but is it worth it? you need to think carefully about everything - try to distance yourself a little bit - don't call him for a week, or just 2 days - reflect on what you want to do in your life - on your plans before you met him - imagine the future...

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ayman1980
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iam Egyptian man i can assure to you you should doubt any egyptian man asks you to do orfi marriage , [Mad] thats suspecious believe me
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Mariya
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dear jesse, thanks for reply, г know im only 19 hes 20, well 1st he said that he was 22 but then he said that its just all hes friends think so but really hes 20. we are both so young. i cannot imagine how he can already use me like that hes so young, but anyway everything can happen. hes from hurghada, hes still in college, getting his degree in tourisme
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Mariya
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also today i was tellin him that i have problems with money, so he said so he can send me money and how many do i need, well щасфгыу ш said that i dont need him to do that, but i dont know if i would say yes im not sure hw would send it.
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anthropos
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Mariya,

I think that you should try your best to keep money all together out of the relationship - it only causes confusion...if you need money ask somebody else - not him.

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Mariya
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i wasnt asking him, he just said that if i need it he can give it to me, he is so sweet with me, i cannot understand how can egy man be so nice to a girl, spend so much time with her, live, sleep, do everything together and in the same time lie to her, heart her feelings. when you live with a person that you like not even love you care about the person, right? how can you do all this stuff to this girl??? quran doesnt let them do so many things, they follow it, they are so fukin religious, but does quran let YOU treat girls like that????
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anthropos
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maybe they aren't really thinking that they are lying to you - maybe they say it as a routine - something that should be said to a girl to make her like you - cultural behaviour.

Believe me Mariya, I cannot understand it either but it seems that some people or cultures don't have a hard time being false - or superficial in their talk. It is superficial manners.

I have an Egyptian boyfriend who is also very sweet to me but these doubts come so often to me - maybe I should stop reading this forum, because there are many stories about bad Egyptian men here - but at the same time my logic is telling me not to stick my head in the sand and pretend that his love couldn't possibly be fake.

The problem is that we don't know how to "read" Egyptian culture or Egyptian men. We are ignorant and they know it....

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Charm el Feikh?
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hi Mariya... welcome to ES.

i feel for you. i dont have much experience with egy men, but the little i do have i find them to be sincere and trust worthy. i have an Egyptian man helping me a lot, we talk on line about everything. he wanted a relationship with me, but we are just friends. he tells me how he wants a relationship, that he always imagined he would marry a British girl, how much he adores the Scot's, and i believe he doesnt want to leave egypt... he doesnt care about a visa. of course i could be wrong but i really dont think i am. he is a great guy, sooo funny and kind, any girl that falls for him will be very lucky... who knows, it might even be me after all!

Anthropos, what you said is really ringing true with me at the moment "the eternal battle between the mind and the heart"... such a dilemma. for me personally the roles are completely switched (head says do it... heart isnt interested) but i can understand how people fall passionately and deeply in love if all systems are go!!!

any other time in my life and id tell you to err on the side of caution... but right now id love to be in love!! so i want to tell you to throw caution to the wind and go for it. it sounds like you dont have much to loose anyway... even if it doesnt work out so what?

live your life!!!

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Mariya
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dear anthropos, you are so right about soul and mind, this is what i feel now too, seems that we are in the pretty same situation. г know its not a problem for me to give him 20 pound, even 20 dollars,its what you do when you are together, you help each other. hes also lookin for a job for me for summer,but maybe i will not be staying with him for a while, even thought he really wants it. may be we should check our relationship and only then live together. also i know there egy man who only uses girls, but hello there are also normal ones!!!i mean there shoulod be, and who said that the one who was using other girls cannot fall in love with one someday, he wont use her than, right???its up to your heart!!!
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jesse
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ladies,
i feel that you have to know that any guy u get to know from hurghada or sharm el sheikh or anywhere in sinai you must must believe that the relationship is totally fake ...egyptian guys who go there to study or even to work in the tourism field are after almost one thing and it is to marry a foreigner and to let her work over there because foreigners get paid very high in hotels while the egyptians are really underpaid. i work in this field but in cairo and believe me marya this is a very obvious scheme get out of it while u can.

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anthropos
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yes, I think that there is a high probability that he is (or at least was in the beginning) trying to use you in this way, i.e. as access to easy money. But who knows maybe real feelings have developed in his heart for you - the question remains though whether this is something that you could forgive or if you would consider continuing the relationship on these false premises even if now the feelings could be genuine.

As Charm said - you haven't got anything to lose really, you just have to be sure that you can take of yourself in Egypt if all hell breaks loose

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Charm el Feikh?
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buy a RETURN ticket.... get a bit of cash in your pocket and go!!!

it will be a great life experience for you.

.....these 'gigolos'.... its a way of life... they even train in it, seriously.... and you know what, i dont blame them. who wouldnt like an easy comfortable life? i even admire them a bit for trying....

but they all still have hearts. they are not robots who cant fall in love. in fact the egyptians are so romantic they seem to fall in love at the drop of a hat!!! that being the case, if it was me, id look for someone who matches my requirements... then proceed to fall in love with them. is that fake? or just wise.

in fact i think ive just answered my own dilemma!

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Mariya
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charm el feich, thats true everybody has heart, nobody is inssure from falling in love, even egy gigolos!!!lol you right. also i was telling him that im not sure about his feelings and that he might find other girl while im gone, but he was saying that he has me in his heart and doesnt need anybody else. and then we didnt contact in 2 days so i decide to sms him and i say i hope she is better than me, and i told him that i fall in love with him was my mistake, so he said that i should trust him and the reason why he wasnt writing to me is that he didnt have credit on his phone and all hes saying to me is coming from his heart and i should beleave him. So what do you think if im telling him that i dont trust him and i think he might get other girl but hes still saying that he loves me, do you think gigolo would do that????
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anthropos
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Mariya,

All those things that he said to you when you confronted him it is as if they were taken out of my boyfriend's mouth! Are the clichés so strong there? Are the romantic lines to sweeten girls taught to these Egyptian guys in elementary school??

My boyfriend has been pressuring me VERY MUCH to marry soon and I have never understood this attitude with him - we are far away and we cannot stay together at this time for various reasons for example - yet he is almost insisting on this even though he is a pretty "modern" type of guy.

So I started to wonder about his reasons from all angles. He is relatively poor, he doesn't have a prestigious education. In other words from a practical view he doesn't maybe have as many opportunities available to him as some people do. So maybe he thinks of me and my country as an advantage - a benefit of sorts - but at the same time I truly believe that he can and that he does love me with all his heart. So I came to the conclusion that he is real in his feelings but that in his eyes I come also with certain benefits. I am not sure though whether these benefits are violating some holy rules of love. Maybe the adult way is to realize that all relationships are conditional in a sense.

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Mariya
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anthropos, yeah thats right, he might love you with all his heart, you are a nice girl, you have good time together and also you are a lucky ticket for him, love plus some opportunities-THE BEST!!! i mean a lot of girls do that with man, man can also do that, right, lets allowe them, anyway if they cheat on us we dont know, but when they are with us, they make us feel good, nice to us, good sex(PERFECT SEX I TELL YOU) as long as his nice to you, let him cheat. anyway you will stop love him once, i know it, its posible to stop loving a nicest guy, i had one, he was perfect but one day i understood i dont love him anymore. so we just stay with them, and then we leave our selfs!!! easy
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anthropos
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Yes I know Mariya - How can we ever know if they are cheating on us while we are in Europe and they in Egypt?? It doesn't make me feel good but I know, as you said, that when I am with him in real person he makes me feel so good, so protective and sweet and nice and the sex is not too bad either [Wink] . So I try to live with it and trust him - after all he can never know either what I am doing here.

Sometimes I wonder if I have chosen this long-distance relationship because I like picking up the telephone and hearing sweet words spoken to me at the end of the day and skipping all the other drama that comes with real life. Aren't I then using him as well?

But of course such a relationship hardly lasts and the feelings rub off and the sweet words aren't heard anymore, so it is either a choice of taking the plunge and sticking with your man because surely there will be a day when he won't say those sweet words or just going somewhere else...

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Karena
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I don't really like talking about my personal life but hey you all talk about Egyptian men being liars, cheats etc. I was married to the biggest English bast.... for 8 years and in the last 18 months of our marriage I knew something was wrong, the lies the deceipt, yes he was having an affair and too top it all she was "PREGNANT" hence I divorced him. I too have been on my own for a very long time and I now have an egy boyfriend who I met last September (was not even looking for a man) he was a friend of a friends boyfriend in Egypt and I have been to see him twice now and actually on my third visit in April. It took me a long long time to ever trust again and I do not give my all in any relationship but he is very special to me. He has never asked me for a thing not even marriage but tells me everyday that he loves me so much and makes me feel good. I am not going to rush into anything as I have a good life over here and he has never said he wants to live in England but if that is OUR wish in the end I will do everything I can to get him to come here and who knows maybe one day when I have had enough of the London life I might move to Egypt.

Mariya go with your instincts and even if you pay your way with somethings does it really matter. I do when I visit, its my holiday as well as his.

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anthropos
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Yes Karena bastards unfortunately can be found everywhere [Frown]

in my opinion however these Egyptian men really try to go the extra mile when one is with them in pleasing the woman and doing everything for her and that is something that I have not found in many European men even if by regular standards they could not be classified as bastards...

there is some certain charm with these egyptians that is hard to let go of....

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Karena
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Hi Anthrop, I am not saying that Egyptian men are bastards, "far from it", English men "yes" and I agree with your opinion entirely about Egyptian men they do go the extra mile to make you feel like your so special and pleasing you etc. And as long as they make us feel so good why would we want to let them go!!!!!
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Charm el Feikh?
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OK!!!! well since my last post here, some of you already know this, ive just found out that the man i was about to start dating (english) has a wife and child.... i found this out when she phoned me about it!!!!!

go to egypt.... quick.. what are you waiting for???!!!!!

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Karena
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I'm just packing my case now are you all ready!!!!! I will pick you upon the way [Big Grin]
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Charm el Feikh?
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packed!!! bring yer big hat.... im looking for a husband.... spring weddings are so lovely dont you think!?
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Tibe
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quote:
Originally posted by Charm El Feikh?:
packed!!! bring yer big hat.... im looking for a husband.... spring weddings are so lovely dont you think!?

Dont jump on the first guy that comes along just to have some one, but here in Denmark we have a saying: You should kiss a lot of frogs and the right one turns into a prince. (makes sence?)

I now have an egyptian boyfriend that makes me feel so much inlove and Im flying high but when I read a tread like this it make me feel very scarred and insecure, How could I ever be sure that his a prince and not a frog........ :-(
But then again, - if i dont try this i will never know if he really is the Prince.

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geminilion
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Maybe you should go and check the situation out. I agree that money should be left out of it and you should stop paying his way. Also, I wouldn't have sexual relations with him, just my 2 cents.
It's always hard when the heart is involved. As we all know the brain gets fried. Best wishes and I hope it all turns out ok.

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Charm el Feikh?
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Tibe.... dont worry, im not desperate for a man!!! ive only just started feeling like its time to date again, so i have the chance of being with someone in the future.

you sound like your feeling a wee bit insecure princess? none of us can ever know, and im sure some of the ones that are prince's turn back into frogs.

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santanesia
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I think that is funny when I see somebody answering
' Go , what do you have to loose?'
You can loose a lot of things one is 'time', because it never rewinds; self-steem, direction, and in a lot of cases the happiness of their kids that leave marks forever(I know that is not the case here, but I see there here a lot).

Yes I post the same answer in 3 diferent post because I think it belongs to them.

You are just 19 yrs old, why don't go back to school and/or concentrate more to have a better future?
You mentioned to get a job there where you can stay also. It is a job in a hotel or something like that? If you don't have school what Of job would you be getting?

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_Masrawi_
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I have to agree with santanesia ...

The guy is obviously playing ... and u do have a lot to lose.

Wanna have fun? Go spend a few weeks with him in the summer but do keep in mind that u r being conned ... that way you can't get hurt.

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Charm el Feikh?
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travel broadens the horizon. just cause the relationship doesnt work out doesnt mean she would want to turn back the clock.

go for a while... remember RETURN ticket.

you will gain so much just from independent living, being in a new country, everything! life isnt just about boys!

i agree with Masrawi... go for the summer.

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santanesia
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Travel broads the mind soecially if you go to 'travel' not to see if a relationship will work or not.
Go for the summer? Sure!!!! Move there? No!!!!
Travel through Eupope, Asia, visit your interests,
have lots of fun. That is just my opinion!

'just cause the relationship doesnt work out doesnt mean she would want to turn back the clock.'
I wish I was strong enough to say that, but I'm not.I was in a relatioship with a lot of read ligths like that and I stayed. Three and half years later, bankrupt emitinal and financial, I had to pick up my pieces and believe me , took a long time.I did wish that I could go back and be more mature.
All the red ligths were there, but I didn't want to believe.

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Elegantly Wasted
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ugh....
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Charm el Feikh?
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San... im sorry to hear that, truly i am. however i dont see those red lights in Mariyas story. mariya's red lights have more than likely come from reading ES and stories like yours... not all men are the same mariya, give yourself the chance to experience life... its not always sugar coated but hey, thats life!!!
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santanesia
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I'm very happy now and have been for 15 yeras now.
You don't see red ligths? I do.The red ligths that I see is a lot of small talk about money and he is thinking about orfi, so many things that I read in other posts that call your attention.
My story is like the stories of many womem, all over the world. Like your own story .That wasn't that much fun, i bet.

Have lots of fun but be carfull,that is it, for me!!!
I know that is not always sugar coated, but if a little bitter could be bittersuite!

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Elegantly Wasted
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Orfi is never a good idea. There's a reason why they call it a *f@ck paper*
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ExptinCAI
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Mariya, he doesn't contact you for 48 hours and you accuse him of having another girl?

Do you act like this with men that live in your town?
I doubt you are so jealous, mistrustful and jump to such conclusions when dating someone who lives near you.

You need to think about your behavior - it's not healthy. He may be truthful, but if you're jumping to such conclusions, in your heart you're doubting him.

And I hate to say it, but if your suspicions are this strong, they are probably right. Either that, or you're too insecure to handle a long distance relationship. Either way, it doesn't sound like you're happy.

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santanesia
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ExptinCai,
I think that when we are posting here, you are just observing and suddenly , you just hit the target in a angle that is so good that we miss...
She doesn't want to habe a long distance relationship...She is thinking about moving there.

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Mariya
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santanesia,you were speaking about me getting back to school and how am i going to get a job there with no aducation. i tell you i am in school but i go there only for taking exams twice a year, you know why, cuz i work a lot, okay. i worked in marriot hotel in saintpetersburg as a concierge, now i work in astoria which is one of the best hotels in my city, its a lot od succes for 19 year old girl, so im thinking i can find something to do in egypt, but may be some of you will be able to help me with that??? i need people who can help me please!!!
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Mariya
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yeah and actually i dont mind to experiance life, you know even if hes leying to me, i would like to know how it feels so in my future life i will not make a mistake like that!!! and actually im very nice girl( dont like to say that but you made me do that), cute and i think that a guy can fall for me. im not like you know ugly, old, rich american lady, that he can get something from me, okay. why do you think egy guy cannot also fall in love???
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MotherEgypt
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by jesse:
ladies,
i feel that you have to know that any guy u get to know from hurghada or sharm el sheikh or anywhere in sinai you must must believe that the relationship is totally fake ...egyptian guys who go there to study or even to work in the tourism field are after almost one thing and it is to marry a foreigner and to let her work over there because foreigners get paid very high in hotels while the egyptians are really underpaid. i work in this field but in cairo and believe me marya this is a very obvious scheme get out of it while u can.
[/QUOTE

Hey Jesse
i am in hurghada , working here when i was young
i used to hang around with forigners as normal
friends or when the flame hits and become
something more. but i never thougt of all of
this things you said , why are you freaking
them ?, me and all of my friends used to be
nice , caring and we even used to pay for them
with a pleasure , long ago i remember a friend
of mine stayed in my place to empty his flat for
some of his female friends to stay in cos they
could not afford a hotel , when i listen to this
stories i reall feel so bad it is more like
bashing me and my friends ,and look what
happened now once you try to approach a girl ,
she treats them really badly assuming that guy
is a thieve and low life and the rest of the bad things you
all used to write here , but i live here and i
hnow lots of guys just wanna find love and share
clean value life with some sweet girls , simply
they are just looking for a normal life , where
is love , honesty,dignity and care are leading
the relation to much better understanding and
may to family one day . yes i agree there is
many locals are enjoying this game wheather it
is money or sex and believe me they are not this
smart and if the girl is serious and just a
little smart she will find out about him in the
second date , but the problem is some of the
females are sure how bad her guy is but the
still wanna have it till the end for reasons may be are just concerning them and then they are back to complain while she knew from the first week how he will be acting and she still want it,

Maria

there is a lots of things you will need to know
about your guy in order to figure him out, his
manners, education , family back ground ,etc and
this you need to do anyway in Egypt, Russia and the rest of the world a relationship is the same everywhere , but i can find an excuse for you , if i am in russia it will take from me long time to make a difference between a normal russian girl , highly educated one,easy girl , nouve barouski or a prostitute , so you agree with me that will take time but for sure you will know
yourself , what if you slow down and you control
your emotion till you are sure about your guy ,
In Egypt location is very important to know things about any guy.i am trying to avoid genralization
here for Egyptian or Russians but the top places
for those kind of guys is Luxor , Qena ,Hurghada
(oregion hurghadian ,many guys from luxor and
qena are living here )and the same for sharm el
shaikh , but in hurghada and sharm you will find
many many nice guys from cairo,alex and lower
Egypt. usualy lower Egyptians are more educated
and they have some better manners and it is not
every body like this in upper or lower Egypt ,
so please do not take it as a rule it is more
like an total image from my own experience .
to make it easy for you ,it is the same difference
between a guy lives in teverskaya and he spend
his week end visiting boshkin meusem and end up
in cafeetom having a drink with a friend , or
another guy lives south of moscow in
krasnnogvardeyskaya meets his friends for a
joint then manage to get some money and spend
their night in (night flight) teverskaya ,,you
got it ?
In Hurghada the more nice people you will be
with ,the more fun and pleasure you will have ,
just becarfull when it comes of chosing your
friends our you company that you will hang
around with , because this what will build your
experience here in Egypt
well , for your guy it can be your chance to
change your life style and get your love life ,
and this things need us to struggle to get them
so do not reject it when it comes to you , it
deserves many tries and even some little pain .touch but do not hold , keep doing this till you
are sure the irion is no more hot then you can
hold.
take care

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Mimmi
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quote:
Originally posted by Madame M.:
Orfi is never a good idea. There's a reason why they call it a *f@ck paper*

But here in the west you do not even need an orfi paper.
You can do whatever you want and it is nobodys business , so why is orfi so terribel.
I think orfi is a good thing when you are serious about the relationship but not yet quite ready to get married it is like an engagement.
And especially for westerns whats the big deal they could be with out any paper but the Egyptian partner needs one.
For 2 Egyptiens I think it is different because of the culture and if the girl is left by the boy later so that is not good.
But weserns are used to dating and living together so I see the orfi paper if the relationship is taken seriously like a kind of engagement and a possibility to get to know each other.
I don't mean that you shoud get orfi married if you go to Egypt for one weeks holiday and do that during that time but really if you are in love with someone and it is a serious relationship I can not see anything wrong in it, if both partners take it seriously and are commited to each others.
I know there are men and also women who do miss use the orfi thing

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Mariya
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Mother Egypt, thank you for a good advice
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MotherEgypt
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quote:
Originally posted by Mimmi:
quote:
Originally posted by Madame M.:
Orfi is never a good idea. There's a reason why they call it a *f@ck paper*

But here in the west you do not even need an orfi paper.
You can do whatever you want and it is nobodys business , so why is orfi so terribel.
I think orfi is a good thing when you are serious about the relationship but not yet quite ready to get married it is like an engagement.
And especially for westerns whats the big deal they could be with out any paper but the Egyptian partner needs one.
For 2 Egyptiens I think it is different because of the culture and if the girl is left by the boy later so that is not good.
But weserns are used to dating and living together so I see the orfi paper if the relationship is taken seriously like a kind of engagement and a possibility to get to know each other.
I don't mean that you shoud get orfi married if you go to Egypt for one weeks holiday and do that during that time but really if you are in love with someone and it is a serious relationship I can not see anything wrong in it, if both partners take it seriously and are commited to each others.
I know there are men and also women who do miss use the orfi thing

orfi is more like a word than a real document ,those guys are asking for this paper to put the girl in studied situation to make her feel it is so serious but most of the time it is not that serious feel and it cost nothing or it would cost if the guy is low life and charge her some $ to get this paper done, but why orfi if i just can stay with my girl friend without any problems , most of my friends nver done this paper and they have succesfull relations for years now and they are just waiting for the right time to have a real wedding !! where her family can come and join his family to celebrate reall wedding.
orfi comes up twice
when the egyptian economy geeting realy bad , and no chances for marraige expenses , so it was a new wave in the Egyptian community starting from 1990 , mainly at the universities then out to the streets ,
ecnomy , old ages without marraige and finally the families and thier high demands when it comes to wedding , this reasons are acceptable regardless if orfi is right or wrong ,

sharm and hurghada Orfi is for different reasons , the guys offer this to show his girl how serious he is about being with her so he would get more points , in some areas in hurghada where the very very local people live will not accept a man and woman in a flat without document , then orfi comes up again to stand for 1 week love story !!!
in 80 % in hurghada it would be no problem to live with your girl friend without any hassle but it is all depends where you will live , how is your guy looks like, does he look as a respecable man or just a junky or hibby guy you just got him out of the music box before meeting the land lord ,,it is more like a face control ,,,and this why some of them they stop acting normally and invite you for a cup of tea in his place but he offered you a cup of orfi instead.
orfi gives the relation a sort of commitment to the girl (only if she treats it seriously ) , and this required money to find a flat and rent, so it would be easy for the guy (if bad one ) to have a new place and no more sharing 5 or 8 people one flat , smart way to get extra money , hun we need to pay for the water , hun we need to pay for gas Etc ....etc

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marie therese
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If orfi would be a good thing, why hotels and other refused orfi married couple in order to save their reputation ?

The most of the guys there are bad guys, scooled in order to earn money by women. They learned that lovely words.

Mariya : you can loose much more than money, your dignity. How many girls are forced there to prostitution and are forced to drugs ? How many women finesh there totaly destroyed ?

And their friends, their familiy, even their wife will confirm you his big love in order that you feel sure.

Please take care.

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santanesia
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You are a concierge at age 19? You have to be very special.
Here in the Marriots in US and Brazil, you have to have years of experience to get that job, check the situation in Egypt.

MotherEgypt is very wise.

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ael_husseiny
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mariya

this young man really loves u

dont ever dought ur love to him

keep ur relation a secret , dont put it here for jealous men and woman who r still searching for a lover

go on and have fun, maybe this will be ur long lasted relation of ur life

samir

--------------------
samir

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_Masrawi_
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i am a jealous man still searching for a lover.

Lover characteristics:

Over 165 cms
Under 52 kgs
Blonde or Black Hair
Any color eyes (but prefer green)
Fair complexion (but must tan in the summer)
Must have a sense of humor
Must not be possessive.
Must not be jealous.
Must be fun.

Please PM Masrawi_the_jealous_man@fools_r_us.org for a more detailed and comprehensive list.

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marie therese
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Samir, yes, you are right, for many, many girls
such a relation is the last, because after such a 'happy' relation they are broken for the rest of their life no more able to have confidence in a man.

Mariya, in Russia there are many girls who can give you information. Have a look p.e. to dezy-house.ru
Take care

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Demiana
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Mariya,

When you both are that young, of course you have to be carefull, we all should, but there is nothing in this mails of your's that is troublesome or it should be the lack of understanding each other and looking at each other with stereotyped views.
If you want a relationship you should get to know each other and talk about you're feelings and you're insecurities. But most of all spent time together and see if you can be friends and lovers.
Can you go for a swim together, will he keep on alowing it to you even when you should get married? Will he accept you having you're own religion. Can you be friends even when married. What sort of live are the both of you looking for? Can you make plans together? Can you go along with his family? Will they accept you?
Of course there is always this unequality, where you come from a more wealthy country, don't ignore it, but there is more to life than that. And the orfi cases and you 'testing'. Just don't do that! A relationship should be build in trust.
Just don't get trapped. Take a long engagement, as long as you like. Egyptian man can be engaged you know. They can understand where you come from if you tell them that you both need time to decide whether you should proceed. Don't rush in to things and you will see what will come of this.
Don't assume things about Egyptian men, just see how he is, how his family is and his friends. Like you would do with men from you're own country.
I believe it is a very good idea to work in Egypt for a while. You can even study there if you can make some money. Don't invest to much financially in him, try to remain independent as long as you can. You have to define this relation together and try not to be ruled by stereotypes or to jump to conclusions.
I don't know what it is with some people nowadays. I know women married to arab men that live 'normal' lives and are married for 30 years or more! And don't have to dance to whatever stereotype or convert or strict religions or have to suffer demands from families other than they both are wanting to commit too!
We should stop this nonsens! Two worlds are coming together here and that can be beautifull if it is the two of you that can build a common life. Be you're own woman and don't act out insecurities, it won't work. Don't compromise on what you want!
If he is a fraud you will find out soon enough. He probably is just a young boy in love, very young boy in love with dreams of a special and happy and wealthy life together with you. To me that would be very attractive! Well, but then I am already married for over 10 years.

Demiana

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Demiana
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Sometimes you're insecurities can deceive you. If you feel bad about something you need to talk about it. It could just be some small wrong idea of how to conceive something. That's how cultural differences can work. You can feel hurt where someone just wanted to cheer you up! Talk about it and you will find out!
Some may say that doing 'orfi' is wrong and you are alarmed immediately. You're boyfriend may believe to do you a favour, and that 'orfi' is not that bad to westerners and that you both would need it to have a 'western' engagement. Talk about it! What does he mean by suggesting 'orfi' to you, not what does anybody else feel about 'orfi'.

--------------------
Fools blame everyone else, starting philosophers blame themselves, wise people don't blame anyone (Epictetus)

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