posted
well, you know the big secret in this is that women make men rich, and then can make them broke, heehee. Men like to have INCENTIVE, and a beautiful exciting woman is powerful incentive to pull it together and make something happen. We provide them with a feeling of usefulness, especially when they can succeed well in the SACK! Its just a good daily reminder of their ability to get the job done, a reminder of their power and ability. muahaha. cats outa the bag... but you ever notice what happens to guys when they get divorced after many years of marriage?
Posts: 1161 | From: wo xiang xiao bian ji si le | Registered: Oct 2005
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quote:Originally posted by ' Sharon Stone ': eaasalam - it's better to have none than some loser who can't even pay for our meal not to mention to provide for me and give me roof over head.
Sorry Sharon, I misunderstood you. I thought you meant RICH. But, if this is the case, you are right somebody like yourself cannot settle for less than that.
btw. Take it easy. Don't look for it, God will send you the ONE just right for you. Keep a possitive attitude in order to attract the same. Good luck for you for real.
Posts: 98 | Registered: Aug 2005
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posted
Sharon, you suprise me more and more. I mean you are trying to give people advise in love matters but obviously you can't figure out your own.
Look, I believe that you think too much, you make it difficult to develop a bond to any man. You always find things in a guy you don't like and then he is already out of the picture for you. Maybe you should not have to high expectations, date someone for a while (an intellectual as you are so you don't get bored too quickly having conversations), find someone who has similar hobbies as you do and everything will develop or if not don't be disappointed and move on.
And on your thread you suddenly don't talk about love and deep commitment and bonding spirituality - no you are talking about looking for a rich guy! I don't believe your words, I think you posted a hoax, you want to see people reactions on the subject. You are not that shallow, I really don't think so. And your statement that you just met so far more or less only losers in your life gives me the thought that you might be attracted to these kind of people because you like to help (help syndrome).
Hm, I am not a psychologist you are much more into these things now you tell me what's really going on in your mind? If you want a rich guy you should know where to find and attract them. But do you really want that? What about if this guy is a real bump, a real dork, would his money really satisfy you?
And BTW, don't define yourself over your husband if you have one in the future. Be a woman yourself, be independent, have your own roof over your head, pay for your own meals, don't expect a man coming along a way and give you a sweet and pampered life. And once you are married it is giving and taking, I would not want to expect that my husband pays for everything and everytime especially if I would have an own income.
Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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posted
sharon, are you talking about an egyptian man? because then, its his responsibility to be financial stable and to be able to take care of you and of a future family. this is very clearly stated in islam. Women are also encouraged to marry men who are atleast equal to or greater than the wealth and capabilities that they grew up with. And if a woman wants to work, she can, but her husband can never force her to, as this is his responsibility. it has nothing to do with being a gold digger or anything silly like that. its a neccesary part of life; but its important to make sure its not the only part.
Posts: 140 | From: TX | Registered: Aug 2006
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Tigerlily - your advices to me personally are off the mark.
Topic title is: " would you marry a man for wealth? ". I would be more interested to hear your response in regards of topic itself and questions asked in the very first post here.
I also have a feeling that you are using my own comments as the "100% scientific facts" from my life and because of me sharing my feelings about it - you seem to be taking advantage to use it to portray me as "incompetent" woman who can't help herself, thus can't help others.
Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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Sharon, I commented on your thoughts. I did not mean to offend you, if I did take it as an apology please.
Your are an intelligent woman so through my reply you should have figured out if I would marry for wealth or not. BTW, my family is not rich but we do have a decent lifestyle, if I want something I usually get it, we have multiply children to look after, my husband is working steadily, we are happy.
Now go and get yourself a Donald Trump! Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by ' Sharon Stone ': He has no hair, and he is double of my age (at least)
I think you can overlook that in regards of his fortune. Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Sumbula2: sharon, are you talking about an egyptian man? because then, its his responsibility to be financial stable and to be able to take care of you and of a future family. this is very clearly stated in islam. Women are also encouraged to marry men who are atleast equal to or greater than the wealth and capabilities that they grew up with. And if a woman wants to work, she can, but her husband can never force her to, as this is his responsibility. it has nothing to do with being a gold digger or anything silly like that. its a neccesary part of life; but its important to make sure its not the only part.
Hi ! I am talking about any man. Responsibility to be financally stable is for every man from every part of the world, otherwise in my opinion, he is not a man he is a child who needs to be taken care of.
I don't want to be his mother. If I want to take care of a child, I would rather adopt an orphan. Thanks for the comment that I am not a gold digger. You are right.
I want someone to be at least - as stable financially as I am, or more ( I would not be jealous ) and I am pretty good thus I am not going lower under any circumstance.
If woman who live with mom and dad can get a financially stable man and she did not achieve financial independency or anything on her own, why should I settle for any less?
Of course he needs to be not just financially stable, he needs to have high moral values, integrity, to be open minded, balanced, educated, wise, mature, good looking, social, artistic, intellectual, he needs to love to cook on a regular bases, and above all - to be compassionate and have a generous heart. Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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posted
i am everything you are looking for Sharon , i am a single guy with good job and i have a long hair as well , so i guess i am the one
-------------------- HandsUpHandsDown is that american woman who used to be known as "ana huna" in ES! Strange but true. Posts: 1123 | Registered: Oct 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Guest Of Life: i don't agree with you SleeplessInCairo you can't change how u r or how you deal with people you just look for someone who will accept you as u r , treat you nicely and love how u r beside for how long can she pretend what she's not? what if someone like the fake you, then you just turned back to what u really is? just be ur self, use ur head and think be4 u love if you r looking for a man, know the man should be the provider not the other way around. if he's not what u r looking for, then NEXT be4 it even start.
totally agree...........
Many people here are not qualified to offer their advice here. They are in sham marraiges. All I can say is I am very much like you. A giver, of my time and eveything else. This was never returned to me, not that I wanted it but when I needed it it was not forthcoming. It made me reassess my priorites. I never chased money, It never appealed to me. I looked for a soulmate. Someone who was like me in every way. I never found that person. I think that in the west everyone is obsessed with image, of the latest fashion, celebrity. If you find yourself buying celeb magazines, and having to buy the latest gashion, then something is wrong. We are being manipulated by the media, we are being brainwashed into thinking we must have!!! But in reality we dont need all that ****. You will find the people here who have it are the lonliest most unhappy people. Money cannot buy love. My ex husband is exceedingly wealthy, more you can imagine. Bu I did not know this in the beginning, and in the scheme of things it would not have mattered to me. He loved me...........so much............but the spark was missing. I did not fancy him.
I had it but was not happy. My son takes after me, money means nothing to him, he doesnt have to have the latest toy, he is very simple, but one day he will inherit it all. My worry is about the future. About women wanting him for his money. One day when you least expect it your soulmate will find you. Dont go looking, dont worry about all this.........it will happen. The thing is be true to yourself, pick friends wisely. Dont be so much of a giver. I found my soulmate after years of being with the wrong person, crowd. He is wealthy in his own right but he cares nothing about money, he is very spiritual, very understanding, educated, loving and everything that a soulmate should be. We have husbands and soulmates, the trick is to find your soulmate and make him your husband. Then you will find a peace and happiness that some folk here dont have and can only dream about.
One day hopefully you will see what I mean. You will find that person. Posts: 1500 | Registered: Dec 2005
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quote:Originally posted by egyptian-guy: i am everything you are looking for Sharon , i am a single guy with good job and i have a long hair as well , so i guess i am the one
Well you are lucky. I hope he was loyal and faithful to you ( man of honor and good morals )while he was with you at least. What I did change is that instead of me giving to potential partners, I instead give to strangers ( charity to needy ).
1. They don't know me yet they appreciate it more. 2. I fulfill my duty as a citizen to care about the world as a whole. 3. No problems, no worries, no bad feelings, no hurt on my behalf because I know that charity is more needed to needy strangers than any kind of support to a "healthy adult man" who could not make his life productive.
In other words, I replaced object of whom I am giving, and I am still authentic to myself. Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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posted
I truly believed that human nature of a man will appreciate giving, but I experienced just the opposite effect so I learned the lesson. I also saw that a woman is better off if she never gives to a man - just take, take everything you can even what you don't need, take from him and give to your loved ones too, don't feel sorry, never be so concerned about his finances because that's what they like, they like to be used financially and in any way possible because - the truth is - women know this - men love bitches. ( don't expect them to admit this fact ) When he spends money on you - he likes you more and he sees you as more worthy and valuable because dating or going out with you ( being engaged or married )is not cheap but costs him a lot.
Men only "use" financially and in any way available to them only 1 type of women: Compassionate giving women who understand everything and who mother them 24/7.
I just met a woman a few days ago who changed life of a guy who after he got what he needed told her simply that he wants to go back to his country and marry someone else. This never happened to me personally - but I can imagine her pain and how stupid she felt for giving so much to this idiot and loser. How many more cases not just with man from other countries but with men in your own city who are incapable of providing to themselves. Look around and you will see there are not many single men really who have the basics for the life ( appartment, good paid job, education, car, good background etc ).
Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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quote:Originally posted by egyptian-guy: i am everything you are looking for Sharon , i am a single guy with good job and i have a long hair as well , so i guess i am the one
Do we have a match ?????- oh we need some romance and passion inhere to keep the forum in balance...... Posts: 1215 | From: Nowhere | Registered: Feb 2006
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posted
lol tibe.. bored again today?? i think i will apply to every post today haha :-p
Posts: 712 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Aug 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Guest Of Life: a book - called " Twin Souls " - Finding your true Spiritual Partner by Patricia Joudry and Maurie D. Pressman, M.D
I met my best friend and we are exactly like this twin soul thing, only one thing wrong with this is - he's gay:((((
Posts: 61 | From: UK | Registered: Aug 2006
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quote:Originally posted by ' Sharon Stone ': More tea,
Well you are lucky. I hope he was loyal and faithful to you ( man of honor and good morals )while he was with you at least. What I did change is that instead of me giving to potential partners, I instead give to strangers ( charity to needy ).
1. They don't know me yet they appreciate it more. 2. I fulfill my duty as a citizen to care about the world as a whole. 3. No problems, no worries, no bad feelings, no hurt on my behalf because I know that charity is more needed to needy strangers than any kind of support to a "healthy adult man" who could not make his life productive.
In other words, I replaced object of whom I am giving, and I am still authentic to myself.
Yes I could almost say without a doubt he was faithful. I was too, but whilst he loved me I did not fancy him. I sort of loved him but that was not enough. But I do fancy my new husband. Like crazy and he is the same about me. We are so compatible, as I said money means nothing to me. I walked away from a fortune, it was very easy. I now have love and money. Both mine and my new husbands. Love cannot be bought, it has to be felt in the heart. Dont go looking for money, it wont bring you happiness. Look for someone who makes you feel special each and every day.
I give now to loads of poor folk. There certainly is no shortage of genuinely needy people here in egypt, and that makes me feel good.
As they say 'there are no pockets in your shroud'
Posts: 1500 | Registered: Dec 2005
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quote:Originally posted by more tea vicar ?: Love cannot be bought, it has to be felt in the heart. Dont go looking for money, it wont bring you happiness. Look for someone who makes you feel special each and every day.
Hello more tea, you have cool nickname.
How much a man accomplished in his adult age tells a lot about who the person is. Don't you think? I am becoming like those old fashioned traditional folks - who want not to be just happy and in mutual love but married "well" as well, and have a great life together. "Love alone" is not enough. ( Who is going to pay bills? )
I learned, a man can not make me feel special if he has no money to take me out on a date and have enough to pay for my needs, our needs... I live in such a world where money matters and happiness and quality of life is directly connected with it.
One man told me once, ( his g/friend left him for another wealtier man because she grew in poverty and her parents didn't want her to suffer again, he was not rich at all, he was poor as well so she married another one ): "Every person has a right to marry rich if they grew in poverty, people have right to change their future, there is nothing wrong to want to have better life."
I expected him to say - something else, but he did not. He was not angry at her, he understood her. So, at the same time, I don't want to marry poor and lower my standards. I don't want to change my life and work harder but less.
I was not raised to be materialistic yet I live in a materialistic world so I have better quality of life by being with wealtier man who loves me, then with poor man who loves me as much. So you see love would not be excluded. I can't live without Love but money, wealth, education, financial stability is important as much.
Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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quote:Originally posted by ' Sharon Stone ': ( Who is going to pay bills? )
I live in such a world where money matters and happiness and quality of life is directly connected with it.
"Every person has a right to marry rich if they grew in poverty, people have right to change their future, there is nothing wrong to want to have better life."
I don't want to marry poor and lower my standards.
. I can't live without Love but money, wealth, education, financial stability is important as much.
So if you want to lead a comfortable lifestyle the only solution you see is marrying someone with money? What happened to being responsible for your own life? If you want a particular standard of living, if you want to live in financial security, change your life for the better or whatever, then why don't you work on that yourself instead looking for someone else to give it to you?
No offense, but I find this attitude quite strange.
Posts: 3587 | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
Dalia I am responsible person. I have everything I need, and he needs to have as much as I do but not less. I hope this is more clear. Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Guest Of Life: i don't agree with you SleeplessInCairo you can't change how u r or how you deal with people you just look for someone who will accept you as u r , treat you nicely and love how u r beside for how long can she pretend what she's not? what if someone like the fake you, then you just turned back to what u really is? just be ur self, use ur head and think be4 u love if you r looking for a man, know the man should be the provider not the other way around. if he's not what u r looking for, then NEXT be4 it even start.
totally agree...........
Many people here are not qualified to offer their advice here. They are in sham marraiges. All I can say is I am very much like you. A giver, of my time and eveything else. This was never returned to me, not that I wanted it but when I needed it it was not forthcoming. It made me reassess my priorites. I never chased money, It never appealed to me. I looked for a soulmate. Someone who was like me in every way. I never found that person. I think that in the west everyone is obsessed with image, of the latest fashion, celebrity. If you find yourself buying celeb magazines, and having to buy the latest gashion, then something is wrong. We are being manipulated by the media, we are being brainwashed into thinking we must have!!! But in reality we dont need all that ****. You will find the people here who have it are the lonliest most unhappy people. Money cannot buy love. My ex husband is exceedingly wealthy, more you can imagine. Bu I did not know this in the beginning, and in the scheme of things it would not have mattered to me. He loved me...........so much............but the spark was missing. I did not fancy him.
I had it but was not happy. My son takes after me, money means nothing to him, he doesnt have to have the latest toy, he is very simple, but one day he will inherit it all. My worry is about the future. About women wanting him for his money. One day when you least expect it your soulmate will find you. Dont go looking, dont worry about all this.........it will happen. The thing is be true to yourself, pick friends wisely. Dont be so much of a giver. I found my soulmate after years of being with the wrong person, crowd. He is wealthy in his own right but he cares nothing about money, he is very spiritual, very understanding, educated, loving and everything that a soulmate should be. We have husbands and soulmates, the trick is to find your soulmate and make him your husband. Then you will find a peace and happiness that some folk here dont have and can only dream about.
One day hopefully you will see what I mean. You will find that person.
posted
Very interesting. I am a man with wealth. How do I deduce if the woman is attracted by my wealth or not? I try not to lavish upon a woman, she thinks I am cheap. If I do, I get taken advantage of. What do I do?
@Albino_Eskimo: "When the relationship is young and children are being born & raised what I do in the home he could never accomplish even if he was a multi-millionaire." Could you clarify that? I have friends and family who were better raised by maids than they would have been by their mothers. I am not sure what you mean by your statement? That a multi-millionaire cannot replace a wife with staff? Thanks.
Posts: 345 | Registered: Aug 2006
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posted
Pardon me, Madame; if you find yourself tired it is most polite to excuse yourself rather than snore in the presence of company. Goodnight Perhaps I shouldn't have intruded on the "ladies" parlor.
Posts: 345 | Registered: Aug 2006
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posted
Oops sorry..I must've dozed off after reading yet another thread about utter crap that doesn't pertain to Egypt in the least.
Posts: 2735 | From: my desk | Registered: Jul 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Graf_Genn: Very interesting. I am a man with wealth. How do I deduce if the woman is attracted by my wealth or not? I try not to lavish upon a woman, she thinks I am cheap. If I do, I get taken advantage of. What do I do?
How do you look? Are you attractive? If yes, then money makes no difference because there will be always someone who will be attracted to you instantly.
However, if a man is unattractive and he is with hot looking woman, sure we may assume that he is either great in the bed, or he has plenty of money. Not many men and women fall for personality these days. It's either great looks or money, or both.
Thanks for your comment. I wish more men replied. Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Graf_Genn: Very interesting. I am a man with wealth. How do I deduce if the woman is attracted by my wealth or not? I try not to lavish upon a woman, she thinks I am cheap. If I do, I get taken advantage of. What do I do?
@Albino_Eskimo: "When the relationship is young and children are being born & raised what I do in the home he could never accomplish even if he was a multi-millionaire." Could you clarify that? I have friends and family who were better raised by maids than they would have been by their mothers. I am not sure what you mean by your statement? That a multi-millionaire cannot replace a wife with staff? Thanks.
Okay I'll try to clarify.
Statement: "When the relationship is young and children are being born & raised what I do in the home he could never accomplish even if he was a multi-millionaire."
Meaning: Its not so much replacing the wife/mother with maid, nurse, staff; as so much as a mother/wife can never be replaceable. It does matter how much money a man/husband/father makes, because being married and being a parent costs money.
The difference is whether the wife is the sole provider (virtually, because many Egyptian men could never provide according to the standards the western wife was raised in). According to my newly Islamist ex-husband, a husband needs to provide for his wife according to the living standard her father provided his household was she was growing up. Hence the extreme difficulty we had while being married. He as being a bad Muslim by expecting me to provide the basics and then some while he played dashing, handsome and opportunistic husband. The more radical he became the more it bother him that he could never measure up to my father's example of a provider.
Truth of the matter is Egyptian men when they marry western their western wives have absolutely no intention to provide the same level of lifestyle their father's had provided for them while raising them.
So in terms of Egyptian income he would need to be well off to be a proper Muslim husband.
Anything less he is a deadbeat.
Which is why we are now divorced.
Posts: 991 | From: My daughter is a stalker | Registered: Jul 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Graf_Genn: Very interesting. I am a man with wealth. How do I deduce if the woman is attracted by my wealth or not? I try not to lavish upon a woman, she thinks I am cheap. If I do, I get taken advantage of. What do I do?
And this part is a bit more simple.
You don't need to lavish upon a woman, unless you are seriously courting her. In respect to proper Egyptian engagements.
I don't know if you are Egyptian or western or what. If you provide what your ethnic background is and what country you were born and raised in, it would be easier to answer you.
I don't pay for dates, nor do I give out on the first date (no kiss either).
I don't like 4 star resturants, I get dragged to these establisments by my mother for punishment.
So if its romance you are seeking a nice clean, quiet, ethnic, plenty of ambiance, with excellent service in a resturant. A nice long walk along a scenic path, or a boat ride (prefer row boats). Flowers are a plus after the 4th date (on the first it is just asking for sex and don't appreciate the pushiness). I won't meet your mother until I like you. Much easier to meet your mommy after I have performed oral sex on you, even better after you have done the same (gives me a sense of power over your mother) and that won't happen until I know there is a future with the possibility of marriage on the near horizon (don't want your mommy's approval, I want yours).
Overall, I don't need to know your income until after a marriage proposal. Don't try to flatter me with suggestions of your affluence, it won't match the affluence I grew up amongst so don't bother.
Posts: 991 | From: My daughter is a stalker | Registered: Jul 2006
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posted
"Much easier to meet your mommy after I have performed oral sex on you, even better after you have done the same (gives me a sense of power over your mother)"
Brilliant.
As for me, I am Egyptian, though raised throughout Western Europe. I find it distasteful to speak much of personal wealth, but as this forum is anonymous I guess I feel comfortable saying that I was raised among the top 1% of Western wealth. I am doing quite well for myself, and not resting on what past generations have afforded me.
The whole topic is something I struggle with when dating. I do not have any sisters and my upbringing (and life as an adult) has made it rare to have "amor platonicus" with women, so I haven't been really to settle the issue. My mother of course is of the mind that only an Egyptian girl will be suitable, and even then she points out it is likely she will be after our wealth instead of my heart. When I am in Egypt it is even more difficult because the women are more openly interested in marriage, and money plays a huge role in marriage. So I naturally begin thinking that money may be the primary interest. I don't mind paying for dates or outings (even with male friends) but I don't like to feel taken advantage of. I do not like when someone asks to go to a particularly expensive place once they know I am treating. When that happens frequently I just find that I don't even trust the woman anymore. I am very impressed when a woman asks to go to nice place (not necessarily expensive) and then INSISTS on treating me. That makes me much more comfortable with paying. My dilemma isn't that I am not matching my own expectations, but that I don't know how best to figure if a woman is being sincere with me.
"Overall, I don't need to know your income until after a marriage proposal." This line made an impression, but at the same time knowing an exact income often isn't necessary for a person to mark one as "rich" and begin to change their behaviour.
How does a sincere woman behave, generally?
Thanks for the Albino_Eskimo guide to dating!
Posts: 345 | Registered: Aug 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Graf_Genn: "Much easier to meet your mommy after I have performed oral sex on you, even better after you have done the same (gives me a sense of power over your mother)"
Brilliant.
Thanks for the Albino_Eskimo guide to dating!
holly crap!!! where have i been???!!!
the sono guide to dating!!! shitt!! LOL!
Posts: 5642 | From: hellonearth.myfastforum.org Forum Index | Registered: Feb 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Graf_Genn: "Much easier to meet your mommy after I have performed oral sex on you, even better after you have done the same (gives me a sense of power over your mother)"
Brilliant.
As for me, I am Egyptian, though raised throughout Western Europe. I find it distasteful to speak much of personal wealth, but as this forum is anonymous I guess I feel comfortable saying that I was raised among the top 1% of Western wealth. I am doing quite well for myself, and not resting on what past generations have afforded me.
The whole topic is something I struggle with when dating. I do not have any sisters and my upbringing (and life as an adult) has made it rare to have "amor platonicus" with women, so I haven't been really to settle the issue. My mother of course is of the mind that only an Egyptian girl will be suitable, and even then she points out it is likely she will be after our wealth instead of my heart. When I am in Egypt it is even more difficult because the women are more openly interested in marriage, and money plays a huge role in marriage. So I naturally begin thinking that money may be the primary interest. I don't mind paying for dates or outings (even with male friends) but I don't like to feel taken advantage of. I do not like when someone asks to go to a particularly expensive place once they know I am treating. When that happens frequently I just find that I don't even trust the woman anymore. I am very impressed when a woman asks to go to nice place (not necessarily expensive) and then INSISTS on treating me. That makes me much more comfortable with paying. My dilemma isn't that I am not matching my own expectations, but that I don't know how best to figure if a woman is being sincere with me.
"Overall, I don't need to know your income until after a marriage proposal." This line made an impression, but at the same time knowing an exact income often isn't necessary for a person to mark one as "rich" and begin to change their behaviour.
How does a sincere woman behave, generally?
Thanks for the Albino_Eskimo guide to dating!
Top one percent? Then you'd be a total pass for me. I grew up around old money prefer it to new money and for good reason. There's an old deleted thread in which I basically put someone to shame in a very dispicable manner for this. I won't repost.
I don't like the rich, which is why alot of my classmates parents liked me.
I prefer upper middle class with a good family reputation and history. A few quirky eccentrics in the family is necessary.
What I mainly focus on when determining if a guy is sincere is:
1) Isn't interested in me as a trophy girlfriend or trophy wife. I look the part, but my strong overpowering personality will ruin whatever fantasies they have.
2) Has a strong sex drive but isn't interested in me for primarily sex.
3) "She's a good investment", I don't like this kind of attitude. I don't look at men as a "good investment". If he appears to be able to put up with some of my more obessesive complusive anal retentive habits and extreme socialist views; in addition to be willing to spend a good five years of retirement in solitary confinement of an Alaskan hideout, then he's a keeper. I basically want to see the kids grow up right and start out on the right foot. I am not planning to take anything to the grave nor leave anything for the grandkids. If I manage to have my name on a plaque for anything I will learn to use a focking blow torch to torch my name off.
4) He must be partially socailly mal-adjusted. Partially disfunctional, proud of it and more than willing to voice it on a mountain top. Anyone who claims to be 100% holistically normal I will learn to hate. Because they are full of crap. No one is normal, no one is perfectly mentally sound. My mother used to make me copy out the MMPR (or something close to that acronym, basically a medical dictionary of psychiatric disorders, she was obsessed with it along with any suburban mother). I have learned we are all screwed up.
5) No fricking political or religious conservatives.
Those are my revised requirements. I am from Minnesota we are all this demented.
Posts: 991 | From: My daughter is a stalker | Registered: Jul 2006
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Man, you have your work cut out for you. Maybe you should focus on women who have similar wealth, or at least really well off, so they aren't slaving for your money? I would not want to be in your shoes. Any clever woman can act sincere until she accomplishes her goal. And that's not sexist, a man will/can do it too.
Good luck.
Posts: 8794 | From: 01-20-09 The End of an Error | Registered: Dec 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Graf_Genn: "Much easier to meet your mommy after I have performed oral sex on you, even better after you have done the same (gives me a sense of power over your mother)"
Brilliant. Thanks for the Albino_Eskimo guide to dating!
Brilliant? I hope other "wealthy" men are not having such a low values.
Now , let me ask you this question - have you acquired your 'wealth' by your hard work and education on your own, or you inherited it? Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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Man, you have your work cut out for you. Maybe you should focus on women who have similar wealth, or at least really well off, so they aren't slaving for your money? I would not want to be in your shoes. Any clever woman can act sincere until she accomplishes her goal. And that's not sexist, a man will/can do it too.
Good luck.
And a wealthy man or woman look to slumming it to escape the pressures of marriage. Or they are slumming it knowing they have a history and cannot marry their socio-economic equal.
Or its an easier study than even that. Having more income means power, power over others with less income. And being in a relationship with someone not your equal means you don't have to work on an equal relationship.
Over a few generations this powerplay is played out in the family through really badly matched marriages. Then as the family wealth dwindles a strange glow of wisdome and happiness takes over and the resulting offspring really don't give a damn anyway.
I have too many issues with power, so I'd rather be at my equal.
Posts: 991 | From: My daughter is a stalker | Registered: Jul 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Graf_Genn: "Much easier to meet your mommy after I have performed oral sex on you, even better after you have done the same (gives me a sense of power over your mother)"
Brilliant. Thanks for the Albino_Eskimo guide to dating!
Brilliant? I hope other "wealthy" men are not having such a low values.
Now , let me ask you this question - have you acquired your 'wealth' by your hard work and education on your own, or you inherited it?
And this is coming from a ES username that hasn't dated a guy who has a stable job and his own place?
Sorry I didn't ever consider sexual pleasure fullfillment and mastering of one of the most blessed gifts God has given Man and Woman as a "low value". But I can guess by many of your comments here Sharon that you are Catholic. I am a Lutheran. And a healthy marital relationship requires good healthy sex. Which is the same as in Islam.
Oral sex isn't haram, its an acquired taste for people who are comfortable with their bodies and understand that God wants them to be happy. Posts: 991 | From: My daughter is a stalker | Registered: Jul 2006
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posted
@Sharon Stone I said "brilliant" because I thought it was amusing, not because I thought it was a shining example of morality. As for values, as far as men of my affluence go I am the most principled of my peers. That is not to say my values match yours, but you can believe me when I say that if you have an issue with me remarking "brilliant" to Albino_Eskimo's comment you would be appalled by the rest of us Also I had clearly stated that my wealth comes from both estate and my own efforts. My parents are still alive, so I have not inherited a great deal; just what my mother's parents could bequest me upon passing. Tax-free, of course. The rest is my own earning. I was raised among wealth and have been taught to flourish and not squander, so I am not "new money" and do not have the attitudes of that type.
@Albino_Eskimo After reading your response about money being power in a relationship I found myself to be rather naive on that point. I never really considered that if I marry a woman who really loves me there might be an issue of her feeling inequity due to money. I am hoping for a love marriage where we are partners, not engaged in a power struggle. I may have wrongly assumed that a woman would not feel threatened by a man from a different socio-economic background if I made an effort to consistently express that I loved her regardless. I am not one to really flash wealth about, I find it extremely distasteful, and I may have figured that because of that aspect of my personality a woman would not be intimidated by any financial differences.
@Charm Is your love real??? Posts: 345 | Registered: Aug 2006
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@Albino_Eskimo After reading your response about money being power in a relationship I found myself to be rather naive on that point. I never really considered that if I marry a woman who really loves me there might be an issue of her feeling inequity due to money. I am hoping for a love marriage where we are partners, not engaged in a power struggle. I may have wrongly assumed that a woman would not feel threatened by a man from a different socio-economic background if I made an effort to consistently express that I loved her regardless. I am not one to really flash wealth about, I find it extremely distasteful, and I may have figured that because of that aspect of my personality a woman would not be intimidated by any financial differences.
If you think you have the "personality aspects" to ward off this type of relationship friction then that means she won't be a part of your entire life. She'll be a precious item you'll keep in your pocket and bring out only when no one is around. Hence you are not thinking of your peers.
The lover, BF/GF, fiancee, or spouse attitude isn't the killer; its everyone elses atitude.
I have been out of high school 13 years now. I watched junior high and high school sweethearts break up after 10 years of marriage and 3 kids because the "gold digger" status hadn't worn off during that time. Eventhough they had grown up together.
I do have confidants
And Graf_Genn, it sound like you don't have one of these life long loves "gold diggers" so you'll actually have a much more difficult time finding someone outside of your clique who will be able to withstand the abuse.
Take Snoozers advice marry one of your own.
Posts: 991 | From: My daughter is a stalker | Registered: Jul 2006
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posted
She can still be a part of my entire life because I have friends from all situations. All levels of wealth, all races. My two best friends are middle class and lower class. So my actual friends wouldn't make a problem of it, neither would my family. Business peers, and especially their wives, probably would. That isn't something I really had considered until now, but I have witnessed it a lot. (For some reasons (which seem obvious) wealthy women with poor attitudes are easily threatened when wealthy men are attracted to poor women with healthy attitudes.) Naively I never even considered that it could happen to someone who I was involved with... my colleagues and their spouses are definitely a catty bunch at times. I do not consider them friends though.
In the case of your friends who divorced because the "gold digger" accusation hadn't faded, who was it that instigated the divorce? The more affluent of the couple, or the accused?
Posts: 345 | Registered: Aug 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Albino_Eskimo: And this is coming from a ES username that hasn't dated a guy who has a stable job and his own place?
I See. I was not materialistic ( money was not important to me, but now it is ). Very young people focus on Feelings not on reality of Life.
I did not even thought about him having fency car ( that is actually paid out ), to own his business (that actually works well), a house in the nice area ( not necessarily credit cards, huge morgage, and loans thus huge debt ), furniture ( Ikea is fine with me ), great education ( it doesn't have to be Harvard but good private University ) or anything else. All I cared is if he loves me or not and when will I see him again.
I was not looking for money and financial stability, I was looking for Love and passion and emotional intensities but now I matured so I don't want Love with no Money ( I want both ) , because I changed my views. Men I accountered lately had nothing to offer me except 'sweet talk', and high expectations of what they can get from me. I can't respect a man who wants me to be his Mom, Mrs.Provider or Pamela Anderson.
If my past really matters, I was engaged with very good guys who were well known, popular in my community, respectable, recognized, educated - but that was couple of years ago my dear. One is my ex, we are still in touch yet we have seperate lives - he was all I wanted, he made crucial mistake, we broke up, now he is my friend until further notice. Maybe we direct movie or write a book together ( we talked about it today as the matter of the fact )
Another one I left, I cared about him but he was way more into me and he wanted to marry. I wasn't ready. Maybe I made a mistake, but at that time I did not feel it, so I respected my feelings and he married someone else out of heart brake rather than out of love for her. So that's over too. Both of them were famous and in pretty good shape financially, and they were my best candidates so far. I meet many men who match my criteria but they are usally married and I don't want a married man. My comment about sex and values in dating that you are talking about will follow. Posts: 989 | Registered: Aug 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Graf_Genn: She can still be a part of my entire life because I have friends from all situations. All levels of wealth, all races. My two best friends are middle class and lower class. So my actual friends wouldn't make a problem of it, neither would my family. Business peers, and especially their wives, probably would. That isn't something I really had considered until now, but I have witnessed it a lot. (For some reasons (which seem obvious) wealthy women with poor attitudes are easily threatened when wealthy men are attracted to poor women with healthy attitudes.)
Naively I never even considered that it could happen to someone who I was involved with... my colleagues and their spouses are definitely a catty bunch at times. I do not consider them friends though.
In the case of your friends who divorced because the "gold digger" accusation hadn't faded, who was it that instigated the divorce? The more affluent of the couple, or the accused? [/QB]
You are on a learning curve here, good.
But refering to someone was "poor" or "lower" still isn't best form. You could use the term Balady or common classes and still get your point across.
In the case of your friends who divorced because the "gold digger" accusation hadn't faded, who was it that instigated the divorce? The more affluent of the couple, or the accused?
For all the couples I know in this situation it was amicable. The more "common" or "middle class" of the couple is the petitioner (the person who files for divorce) and the respondant (the spouse who is being divorced) is the one who is more affluent.
If the more affluent of the couple were to be the person who files for divorce then its a real nasty divorce, because it would certainly paint the more "common" or "middle class" spouse as a gold digger.
You don't understand this, but it illustrates what part of the learning curve of "political correctness" or just plain class sensitivity you are on.
Because this is the view from the more "common" side of the fence and its a view that must be explained to the more affluent, when its never been explained to them before.
Posts: 991 | From: My daughter is a stalker | Registered: Jul 2006
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posted
One of my best friends married a well to do man with a good career. He left her and kids for someone half her age. Since he provided for her and kids during most of their married live, he had to share his money with her after his marriage, especially since they have a disabled child she is taking care of. It left her hartbroken for his treason and she has not married again. And in this case she is culturally his mate, educated and had a good career and income before marriage. They were a good couple and nice friends to be with. Those are to simple assumptions if you advise someone to marry their own kind.
Posts: 1419 | From: Amsterdam, Netherlands | Registered: Aug 2003
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All I can say aside from all the bullshit, is the right girl can be rich or poor. It does not matter which background she comes from.
When you are affluent, and your prospective love interest or prospective spouse isn't it does matter what background she comes from.
Its not a black and white issue of whether she/he has money or not.
The economic history of her/his community comes into play.
You are still focusing solely on how people in your clique will perceive her. You haven't begun to focus on how people in her clique will perceive you.
I studied economic history of the USA, and alot of current socio-economic politics that is current is deeply rooted in the entire history of our nation.
A Texan woman who hails from Oil Range and watched some Texans work their rears off to get their oil rigs in the 1950s off the ground and to turn a profit might be abivilant about marrying a high school sweetheart whose family bought out their neighbors and then sold out to Shell or Exxon for millions.
A Minnesotan from the northern mining towns might not be so taken with a metals and polysythentics sales man from LA.
People aren't rich for a reason. Only a certain few can be rich. The rest of us go through cycles adapting to the changing markets and these cycles are created by the rich themselves.
I was lucky growing up. The school I went to was filled with kids with parents from the small farming communities and peppered with children whose grandparents and great grandparents had made their money before 1930 in wheat and lumber. The relationship between farmers and the fat cats of Minneapolis was good for a hundred years before the great depression.
But the two never crossed their blood lines in marriage because of the strong respect.
Over time the trust funds evened out and many of those trust funds were let to charitable organizations while the heirs decided to live normal middle class lives and struggle like the rest of us. Those are the happy ones now. Those are the ones who aren't divorced.
Posts: 991 | From: My daughter is a stalker | Registered: Jul 2006
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