posted
Hello everyone.. I have spent the evening reading many of the threads in this forum and would like your opinion.
I am an american.. and yes, I met my guy online about a year ago. He is egyptian living in Egypt. We talked for a number of months online getting to know each other, and found that we had much in common, and grew closer as the months passed.
We finally decided we should meet. His work keeps him fairly busy, and mine permits me to be quite mobile (I travel often worldwide), so I went to meet him. I have always had a philosophy that it is best to meet face to face and get to know each other that way, and not rely on internet communications. As much as I felt for him already, I needed to know if we both felt the same things once we met.
On my first visit, I spent almost a month in Egypt. For both of us, the feelings we had for each other grew rapidly. He was very open about answering all my questions, and had plenty of his own. I have been married before, and have grown children. He has not been married. During my time there he was very attentive, and spent as much time with me as his work would allow (and it was actually a lot). We went out, and he introduced me to his friends. He joked a bit that his friends teased him that the american woman had kidnapped him. I was cautious in my manners, but did not repress who I am.. as I am a rather independent sort.
I returned again a month later after spending some time in another part of europe. We stayed in constant contact the entire time. It was during this second visit, that I realized how comfortable I had become there. With few exceptions, the experience was a good one for me. When I spoke to him about it he told me his own experience with having been uncomfortable with visitors in the past, and how relaxed and happy he was with me there. Then things turned more serious for us.. we discussed being together long term. A permanent relationship.. marriage.
All the "hard" questions came out for us both. Past relationships, my family ties in the US, his family, finances, children. How would we handle it all? The only thing we did not agree on, was finances. I do quite well, and I wanted to contribute. He insisted that he would support us, and I was to keep my income to myself. He wanted no part of it. It has taken me a number of months, and more discussion to accept that, but I have. We discussed religion, and he has no expectation of me converting to Islam. (although the more I learn.. the more I wonder about that.. it feels so right to me. He has not influenced me in this other than by his own example.. not his words)
He has a very nice rented flat, and a good job, however the recent economy problems have caused a reduction in his income, so we decided to wait until things improved a bit. Meanwhile I returned to the US to get details in order. All my paperwork and such. Those are all taken care of now, and everything is ready. Now I await the day I can return to Egypt.
In the time I have been with him, not once has he raised a hand or his voice to me. In everything we have done, we have done it as a partnership. He insists. LOL. Have I found the one man who does not expect me to wait on him hand and foot? I wonder.
It has been 5 months since I left, and we are still in constant contact, and love each other even more. His father passed away a number of years ago, but he has talked with the rest of his family about me a lot. His mother says she cant wait to meet me (the woman who got her son wanting to settled down) and plans to visit upon my return.
We are both looking towards the end of this wait..
posted
Hard for anyone to know the future and if/how he might change once you are married. Sounds like you've had some good discussions, which is probably more than many do.
Will he expect you to do all the housework and cooking? Will you be working while you are here or you will be at home instead? If you have children together, are you okay with them being raised Muslim, and helping in their education in that manner?
Does he expect you to dress conservatively? It happens sometimes that a man may be okay with how you dress before marriage and expect something different afterward. Also, for some mixed couples (the woman being Christian and the man being Muslim), the husband will want the wife to cover her hair even if she isn't Muslim.
If he won't let you contribute financially and his finances take a turn for the worse after you are here, what happens? You will live hand to mouth scraping by, or he will let you help pay for things?
Also, as so many people have stated so many times before, being here for a month or so on vacation is quite different than living here. If you are used to living in the States and all of the conveniences there, it can be quite an adjustment to live in Egypt full time, not just on vacation time. There's a high probability that you won't find the same products here that you liked in the states, and there are frequently power and/or water outages depending on where you live. Are you used to the heat and humidity? What about mosquitoes? They can be quite a problem (and I speak from personal experience on this one).
From what you wrote it sounds like things are good and I wish you all the happiness in the world, just make sure you have really thought through this move. Your man doesn't sound like he has any "flags" so to speak that I can tell from what you wrote, so maybe things will be okay. Some of us move here and love it and love our husbands very much, and some don't make out so well.
Let us know how things progress. =)
Posts: 1283 | From: Cairo | Registered: Feb 2006
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posted
You've read a lot, so I think you know what the red flags are... Your children are adult, so you're not a rookie anymore. When he is the same, he also will have his expierences,time will tell...
-------------------- “Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.” Posts: 7202 | From: EU | Registered: Nov 2006
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posted
All sounds ok so far, the only red flag is the internet thing as far as I can see, although saying that I met a number of wonderful men online from Egypt but none had any 'lerve' intentions so when we did meet it was as friends and I was escorted around Cairo by my 'brothers'.
As already stated things are VERY different living here to visiting, it can get extremely frustrating at times although Cairo is totally different to Luxor and more 'civilized' in the form of real supermarkets!
Dont burn all your bridges back home. If you are looking at moving here have a plan B as backup. You may think you know this man quite well but until you have lived with him a while you only know the surface of what he wants to show you.
You're grown up enough to know reasonably what you're doing so if you jump in feet first just keep one eye open
-------------------- If you don't learn from your mistakes, there's no sense making them. Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by LovedOne: Hard for anyone to know the future and if/how he might change once you are married. Sounds like you've had some good discussions, which is probably more than many do.
Will he expect you to do all the housework and cooking? Will you be working while you are here or you will be at home instead? If you have children together, are you okay with them being raised Muslim, and helping in their education in that manner?
Woot! replies and questions
Ok.. No he does not expect me to do all the housework and cooking. In his words "this is a partnership, you are not a servant"
I have 3 grown children already, and can not have more. He asked me "do you want children?". When I explained the situation, he was very pleased that I already had children, and expressed (in no uncertain terms) that he didnt want children of his own.. complete with details as to why he doesnt.
quote: Does he expect you to dress conservatively? It happens sometimes that a man may be okay with how you dress before marriage and expect something different afterward. Also, for some mixed couples (the woman being Christian and the man being Muslim), the husband will want the wife to cover her hair even if she isn't Muslim.
Yes.. I had wondered about this, and we discussed it quite a bit. He expressed that there might be some circumstances where I might be more comfortable with my hair covered, but that he had no preference. When he was showing me pictures of his family, his mother dressed did not have her hair covered, but was conservative in her dress. I am comfortable with that concept, and dressed accordingly while I was there.
quote: If he won't let you contribute financially and his finances take a turn for the worse after you are here, what happens? You will live hand to mouth scraping by, or he will let you help pay for things?
He will.. if it becomes necessary, he would just rather support us himself. He does not want to start our marriage in that arrangement however.
quote: Also, as so many people have stated so many times before, being here for a month or so on vacation is quite different than living here. If you are used to living in the States and all of the conveniences there, it can be quite an adjustment to live in Egypt full time, not just on vacation time. There's a high probability that you won't find the same products here that you liked in the states, and there are frequently power and/or water outages depending on where you live.
I have lived in various places outside the US much of my life. Power and water outages are not uncommon to me... same with products. I adapt well to changes in environment, and already scoped the markets when I was there before. My cookbook has already undergone revisions too (I like to cook.. cant help that). When it comes to visiting new places, I am not a classic tourist. I refuse to take pictures, and prefer to observe every detail of everyday life.
quote: Are you used to the heat and humidity? What about mosquitoes? They can be quite a problem (and I speak from personal experience on this one).
Good question.. answer, yes. It is actually hotter where I live now, than where he lives, and humidity has never been an issue for me. Mosquitos.. annoying, but are another fact of life even here.
quote: From what you wrote it sounds like things are good and I wish you all the happiness in the world, just make sure you have really thought through this move. Your man doesn't sound like he has any "flags" so to speak that I can tell from what you wrote, so maybe things will be okay. Some of us move here and love it and love our husbands very much, and some don't make out so well.
Let us know how things progress. =)
I will.. and thank you
I feel rather odd not having a single negative answer to your questions.. is that strange?
Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: All sounds ok so far, the only red flag is the internet thing as far as I can see, although saying that I met a number of wonderful men online from Egypt but none had any 'lerve' intentions so when we did meet it was as friends and I was escorted around Cairo by my 'brothers'.
As already stated things are VERY different living here to visiting, it can get extremely frustrating at times although Cairo is totally different to Luxor and more 'civilized' in the form of real supermarkets!
I think I may be about to say a bad word here... but he lives in Hurghada. He has a university degree, and moved there a few years back. He has been employed there in the same job since he first arrived. I know.. small markets.. but am used to that too I ran into some of the frustrations involved in "living" there, as he took me with him most the time, including some work related jaunts. Holy ####.. the price of electronics, lol.
quote: Dont burn all your bridges back home. If you are looking at moving here have a plan B as backup. You may think you know this man quite well but until you have lived with him a while you only know the surface of what he wants to show you.
Guaranteed I wont. In my job, I can work from anywhere as long as I have internet access. I have spent 6 months of the last 18 living outside the US. During both my trips to Egypt, I was able to continue working normally. My family has been very accepting, and if things were to go bad for any reason, I always have a home here too.
quote: You're grown up enough to know reasonably what you're doing so if you jump in feet first just keep one eye open
Always.. was reading some of the other threads about "groping". I had to laugh a bit.. even though its quite serious. Ever been groped by an Italian in Rome? Not so different. Then.. there was the bomb in my car in Germany. I tend to be very cautious, especially in new places. Call me a worry wort, but it serves me well.
Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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quote:Originally posted by MJ: Ever been groped by an Italian in Rome? Not so different. Then.. there was the bomb in my car in Germany.
A bomb? Where and why?
No groping men in Germany though!
Nope, no groping men in Germany, nor Cyprus, nor Sweden, no England.. couple in France though, lol. I think the italians just had a thing for blondes.. as both myself and my blonde friend traveling with me, got the same treatment.
As for the bomb, my ex was in the US military, and we lived in a small village. I had an old Volkswagon square back, and had stopped to talk to my landlord who had a civi job on the base. When I came out.. my car door which was locked when I went in, was ajar. I backed right off from it.. and called for help. Seems my coming out, had scared them off.. the bomb was under the seat, but not fully wired. Scared the daylights out of me!
Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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posted
You obviously have your head screwed on and have looked into things thoroughly. There is quite a few ladies here that have moved to Egypt for various reasons and I am sure they will be able to give you any advice or tips regarding living there full time. Wishing you the best.
Posts: 4476 | From: Scotland | Registered: Mar 2006
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quote:Originally posted by young at heart: You obviously have your head screwed on and have looked into things thoroughly. There is quite a few ladies here that have moved to Egypt for various reasons and I am sure they will be able to give you any advice or tips regarding living there full time. Wishing you the best.
Thank you.. I sure hope so! I have only myself to blame if I missed something obvious.
Before we met, I had been planning to move myself to Cyprus and make a new start, and had been studying greek for 3 years now. Have made many trips there.. then screeeech.. plans change, lol.
So basically.. new place, same investigative method. I hope it all works out for us, but will always have backup plans Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: All sounds ok so far, the only red flag is the internet thing as far as I can see, although saying that I met a number of wonderful men online from Egypt but none had any 'lerve' intentions so when we did meet it was as friends and I was escorted around Cairo by my 'brothers'.
As already stated things are VERY different living here to visiting, it can get extremely frustrating at times although Cairo is totally different to Luxor and more 'civilized' in the form of real supermarkets!
I think I may be about to say a bad word here... but he lives in Hurghada.
oohhhhhh bad word, red flag alert
I think you should not move, why should you move to the seaside with nice sea breezes when im stuck in the OVEN called Luxor 'snot fair Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by LatinaLover: u meet his mothr his famly face wid face?wht thir opnon wid tha rlationship?u talk wid thir in fone?
translation:
have you met his mother and the family face to face?
what is their opinion on your relationship and do you speak to them by phone? Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: oohhhhhh bad word, red flag alert
I think you should not move, why should you move to the seaside with nice sea breezes when im stuck in the OVEN called Luxor 'snot fair
Awww ... yes, its one of the things I love about Hurghada. And let me tell you.. after the muddy brown waters of the Gulf of Mexico (and even that is hours and hours away from me).. the Red sea is a real treat!
Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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quote:Originally posted by LatinaLover: u meet his mothr his famly face wid face?wht thir opnon wid tha rlationship?u talk wid thir in fone?
translation:
have you met his mother and the family face to face?
what is their opinion on your relationship and do you speak to them by phone?
I think I will reply to the translation!
Not yet. Mom lives in another country. She moved back there when his father died.. and the rest of the family is in Alex. I have not talked directly to his mother yet, but I have with his brother.
So far, the family has been very supportive of us, and I will be meeting them upon my return.
Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: All sounds ok so far, the only red flag is the internet thing as far as I can see, although saying that I met a number of wonderful men online from Egypt but none had any 'lerve' intentions so when we did meet it was as friends and I was escorted around Cairo by my 'brothers'.
As already stated things are VERY different living here to visiting, it can get extremely frustrating at times although Cairo is totally different to Luxor and more 'civilized' in the form of real supermarkets!
I think I may be about to say a bad word here... but he lives in Hurghada.
oohhhhhh bad word, red flag alert
I think you should not move, why should you move to the seaside with nice sea breezes when im stuck in the OVEN called Luxor 'snot fair
oh come on Ayisha, you know you are much more suited to living amongst the old ruins.You have so much in common Posts: 4476 | From: Scotland | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
why not talk wid her dirct MJ?he nevr talk wid her only 1 tim wid all ur vists wid him?how u know her true opnon and sure wid it?he can say wht want say but how u be sure wid it?wht his age?
Posts: 95 | From: Masr | Registered: Apr 2009
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posted
In addition to what he has told me, I only know what his brother had to say about it (the brother mentioned that he talked about me all the time to the family, we spent quite some time talking on the phone, both asking each other questions).
She does not speak english, and I do not speak arabic (yet), so I do not see how talking to her on the phone will help just yet Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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quote:Originally posted by young at heart: oh come on Ayisha, you know you are much more suited to living amongst the old ruins.You have so much in common
Dont they have old ruins in Hurghada?
Perhaps I should move there so they have some then
ps. you owe me 25LE Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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posted
All sounds good to me, obviously we are not a magic eight ball though. But, life is for experiences, no point sitting out home wondering "what if..." My advice (though think you are already doing it), is read as many horror stories as you can, no matter how dramatic and rare. Just so this will alert you to the earliest warning signs, if there are any to be had. As for covering your hair. I've met and spoke to many mixed religion couples (muslim/christian), and in all of those, the muslim husband did not expect his christian wife to cover her hair, and they don't. You have been to Egypt, so you know there are many women who don't cover their hair. As you two don't plan to have children, then really there is no problem with you two having you own individual beliefs and respect for them (when children come into the picture it can get a lil bit more "messy").
So, good luck with everything! I should have found me a Hurghada man, sounds so much nicer than polluted Cairo lol.
Posts: 2573 | From: England | Registered: Jun 2008
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posted
Both hubby and I are muslim and hes not said a thing when I decided not to cover anymore. Think hes glad he just has a soggy wife and not soggy hijabs all over the house as well
-------------------- If you don't learn from your mistakes, there's no sense making them. Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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posted
What age difference do we speak here - +/- 20 years??
Relationships of young Egyptian men with significantly older foreign women are much looked down by the locals as the young Russian chicks too.
MJ, just be aware there is much scam going on, many of these guys who work there in tourism incl. sales change gfs like shirts, some of them have even relations with more than one at a time.
I haven't read through the whole thread but is he considering to really marry you and planning a future together?
You know I always get a little cautious whenever I hear that a particular Egyptian doesn't want to have any children - regardless if female or male. Egypt overall is still very traditional which includes marriage AND children. You must be aware that this fact could change over the years, that he is longing for children so that's a risk you have to keep in mind.
Anyhow good luck with your man, btw I am married to an US Army officer in Germany who will retire within the next few months - we are happily counting down the days!! Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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posted
Sounds like a fairly good soul, you've seen how he is and you've seen Hurghada so you're not into any surprises, point is.. will you be able to adapt to a third world country ? With all the crappy culture and people ? Not everybody can..but many have done so. If you can, then go for it, you've nothing to lose, since you don't plan on getting any kids, the biggest problem in such situations..and always have a plan B, as stated above.
Good Luck.. Posts: 3219 | From: Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone. | Registered: Nov 2005
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quote:Originally posted by young at heart: oh come on Ayisha, you know you are much more suited to living amongst the old ruins.You have so much in common
Dont they have old ruins in Hurghada?
Perhaps I should move there so they have some then
ps. you owe me 25LE
Not that I have found! I actually love old rocks.. my friends all tease me about it. For them.. its all old hat (they live with it every day).. so they chatter away on their cell phones while I act like a mountain goat, lol
Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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quote:Originally posted by weirdkitty: All sounds good to me, obviously we are not a magic eight ball though. But, life is for experiences, no point sitting out home wondering "what if..." My advice (though think you are already doing it), is read as many horror stories as you can, no matter how dramatic and rare. Just so this will alert you to the earliest warning signs, if there are any to be had. As for covering your hair. I've met and spoke to many mixed religion couples (muslim/christian), and in all of those, the muslim husband did not expect his christian wife to cover her hair, and they don't. You have been to Egypt, so you know there are many women who don't cover their hair. As you two don't plan to have children, then really there is no problem with you two having you own individual beliefs and respect for them (when children come into the picture it can get a lil bit more "messy").
So, good luck with everything! I should have found me a Hurghada man, sounds so much nicer than polluted Cairo lol.
I have read so many horror stories in the last day.. that I have been sitting here shaking all night. Questioning everything I know, have seen, been told, and experienced since this all started.
As for my hair.. he told me "if you choose to cover it I think it would look very pretty with your face, but I love seeing your hair"
Thanks for the good wishes Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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quote:Originally posted by Tigerlily: What age difference do we speak here - +/- 20 years??
Relationships of young Egyptian men with significantly older foreign women are much looked down by the locals as the Russian chicks too.
MJ, just be aware there is much scam going on, many of these guys who work there in tourism incl. sales change gfs like shirts, some of them have even relations with more than one at a time.
I haven't read through the whole thread but is he considering to really marry you and planning a future together?
You know I always get a little cautious whenever I hear that a particular Egyptian doesn't want to have any children - regardless if female or male. Egypt overall is still very traditional which includes marriage AND children. You must be aware that this fact could change over the years, that he is longing for children so that's a risk you have to keep in mind.
Anyhow good luck with your man, btw I am married to an US Army officer in Germany who will retire within the next few months - we are happily counting down the days!!
There is a 10 year difference. I am 46, he is 36. We look much the same age.
Yes.. his specific words are "permanent legal marriage".. and "once we do this, its permanent, be sure." Our planning has been long term, and we plan to go to Cairo to the MOJ.
He was quite adamant about his reasons for not wanting children, but I would rather not get into them here. He was open with me about it breaking traditional values, and expressed joy that I already have 3 children to love and cherish. I am quite aware that his feelings could change, and honestly it has worried me at times. I can either take his word for it based on his explanation which I believe, or worry myself sick over it for years. I dont think that worry would be healthy for either of us, but I will keep an eye on it.
Congrats on the impending retirement! Double digit midget yet?
Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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quote:Originally posted by Dzosser: Sounds like a fairly good soul, you've seen how he is and you've seen Hurghada so you're not into any surprises, point is.. will you be able to adapt to a third world country ? With all the crappy culture and people ? Not everybody can..but many have done so. If you can, then go for it, you've nothing to lose, since you don't plan on getting any kids, the biggest problem in such situations..and always have a plan B, as stated above.
Good Luck..
I can be happy in a hut with no running water or electricity if I had to, lol... oh yeah.. been there, done that.
It will be an adjustment... a big one. Praying I am up to the task, and I have strong belief that I am.
Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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He was quite adamant about his reasons for not wanting children, but I would rather not get into them here. He was open with me about it breaking traditional values, and expressed joy that I already have 3 children to love and cherish. I am quite aware that his feelings could change, and honestly it has worried me at times. I can either take his word for it based on his explanation which I believe, or worry myself sick over it for years. I dont think that worry would be healthy for either of us, but I will keep an eye on it.
We had long discussions about kids before I got into my relationship and I understand my hubbys reasons for not wanting any. It does 'break traditions' but not everyone is the same, even here. This is between you and him and best to keep it that way, as if you put things here it can be picked apart till it gets to the bones then someone will still pick over the bones Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: We had long discussions about kids before I got into my relationship and I understand my hubbys reasons for not wanting any. It does 'break traditions' but not everyone is the same, even here. This is between you and him and best to keep it that way, as if you put things here it can be picked apart till it gets to the bones then someone will still pick over the bones
So very very true.. vultures we are! But still many valid points to consider, and things to keep my eyes open about Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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quote:Originally posted by MJ: As for my hair.. he told me "if you choose to cover it I think it would look very pretty with your face, but I love seeing your hair"
Good luck with that.
Mr. Wonderful said the same thing for a long time, until he decided covering wasn't even a religious matter anymore, but more of a cultural matter. Yeah. The culture. And even in the religious realm he's decided, all by himself, that he KNOWS it's not a choice and he's also decided that since neither of his sister cover, they have bad husbands.
Listen, it's no secret these men tighten up after they get married and they get even tighter as they get older. Mine is so tight he's in a knot. Just so ya know.
Posts: 758 | From: Here. There. Everywhere. | Registered: Mar 2008
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posted
Anything about the 'VISA' issue ? Anyone ?? Posts: 3219 | From: Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone. | Registered: Nov 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Dzosser: Anything about the 'VISA' issue ? Anyone ??
I'm not sure if I bit my tongue or if it got snagged on a biece of bobcorn.
Posts: 758 | From: Here. There. Everywhere. | Registered: Mar 2008
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quote:Originally posted by Dzosser: Anything about the 'VISA' issue ? Anyone ??
She has spend the day reading about all the issues, so obviously also that issue doesn't sound strange to her. Okay, YES, a financially independant woman with 3 adult children and 10 years older as her in Hurghada living boyfriend which she met online, could mean that he was out on a visa. But, regarding her traveling and working around the world, I guess she knows what's going on...above that, she doesn't sound na-ive or ignorant.
By the way, I don't understand where these women meet this people. Via-via like as friends from my friends on facebook? Chatboxes? Somebody I don't know, does not know my mailadress, and also can't appear on my Messenger...
Posts: 7202 | From: EU | Registered: Nov 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Questionmarks: [QUOTE]By the way, I don't understand where these women meet this people. Via-via like as friends from my friends on facebook? Chatboxes? Somebody I don't know, does not know my mailadress, and also can't appear on my Messenger...
quote:Originally posted by The Ministry of Common Sense:
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: I decided not to cover anymore.
When did that happen?
About 3 weeks or so ago.
I dont do this heat too well anyway and am still dripping without it. The only difference it has made is I get more TAXI and Caleche offers as im seen as a tourist again Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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By the way, I don't understand where these women meet this people. Via-via like as friends from my friends on facebook? Chatboxes? Somebody I don't know, does not know my mailadress, and also can't appear on my Messenger...
When Tut was a lad I used to frequesnt Yahoo Islam chat rooms. I met lots of nice peeps on there and there are millions of Egyptian men! When my friend and I came to Egypt in 2004 I met up with a young man who owned a tea company, a doctor, a guy who works for an oil company and all 3 were really wonderful, friendly and showed me cairo, markets, Mosques, the hanging church and all sorts, not one wanted any romantic involvement and not one wanted money from me. I was treated like a sister and a lady by all of them. I dont know about now as I didnt go to Yahoo rooms for a long time and thats just Egyptians I 'met'. One time I spent 8 hours talking to a Palestinian in Jordan who taught me games on pc and how to use a lots of shortcuts and make smileys best way to spend a Sunday in those days Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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*Met online *Works in Hurgadah (University of how to fleece older women) *Mother conveniently living outside the country *Doesn't want children *Age gap ..not a big one but still a red flag
All could just be perfectly Ok and you also sound like a lady that totally has her feet on the ground so that counts for alot...
But if it was me my biggest concern would be an existing wife and family which as he works in a tourist city would be living somewhere else in Egypt. If you can rule that one out then you 'won't need to blame yourself for missing the obvious'.
The only way you are going to know for sure if he is married or not is from his indentity card. Now our dear administrators of this site have suspended the search facilty but there is somewhere a posting by Akshar with pictures of what a married and single persons ID card looks like. Anyone know where to find it?
Posts: 3809 | From: Paradise | Registered: Mar 2003
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quote:Originally posted by The Ministry of Common Sense:
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: I decided not to cover anymore.
When did that happen?
About 3 weeks or so ago.
I dont do this heat too well anyway and am still dripping without it. The only difference it has made is I get more TAXI and Caleche offers as im seen as a tourist again
You little rebel!! Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Penny: But if it was me my biggest concern would be an existing wife and family which as he works in a tourist city would be living somewhere else in Egypt. If you can rule that one out then you 'won't need to blame yourself for missing the obvious'.
The only way you are going to know for sure if he is married or not is from his indentity card. Now our dear administrators of this site have suspended the search facilty but there is somewhere a posting by Akshar with pictures of what a married and single persons ID card looks like. Anyone know where to find it?
That thread's from waaaaaaaaaaay back when, yes?
There's no sure-fire way to know if he's not already married, even from his identity card because maybe he didn't change his card.
If a visa ever becomes a topic of discussion, that's where the truth about marriage will come out - even previous ones (marry, divorce for the sake of marrying a westerner and getting the visa, divorce, re-marry first wife - we all know the drill).
Posts: 758 | From: Here. There. Everywhere. | Registered: Mar 2008
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quote:Originally posted by MJ: As for my hair.. he told me "if you choose to cover it I think it would look very pretty with your face, but I love seeing your hair"
Good luck with that.
Mr. Wonderful said the same thing for a long time, until he decided covering wasn't even a religious matter anymore, but more of a cultural matter. Yeah. The culture. And even in the religious realm he's decided, all by himself, that he KNOWS it's not a choice and he's also decided that since neither of his sister cover, they have bad husbands.
Listen, it's no secret these men tighten up after they get married and they get even tighter as they get older. Mine is so tight he's in a knot. Just so ya know.
I appreciate the warning on that. I am quite familiar with it. I dont even want to get started on my ex.. *shudder*.
Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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quote:Originally posted by Dzosser: Anything about the 'VISA' issue ? Anyone ??
She has spend the day reading about all the issues, so obviously also that issue doesn't sound strange to her. Okay, YES, a financially independant woman with 3 adult children and 10 years older as her in Hurghada living boyfriend which she met online, could mean that he was out on a visa. But, regarding her traveling and working around the world, I guess she knows what's going on...above that, she doesn't sound na-ive or ignorant.
By the way, I don't understand where these women meet this people. Via-via like as friends from my friends on facebook? Chatboxes? Somebody I don't know, does not know my mailadress, and also can't appear on my Messenger...
VISA issue.. hrmmm.. He has a valid US tourist visa, I have seen it, but has not used it. While we have discussed eventually coming to the US, we have also discussed moving elsewhere. Right now, the plans are to stay in Egypt for 1-2 years at least.
As for messengers.. Only people I know can message me. We met on facebook through a mutual freind.
Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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quote:Originally posted by Penny: Ok you have a few red flags there:-
*Met online *Works in Hurgadah (University of how to fleece older women) *Mother conveniently living outside the country *Doesn't want children *Age gap ..not a big one but still a red flag
All could just be perfectly Ok and you also sound like a lady that totally has her feet on the ground so that counts for alot...
But if it was me my biggest concern would be an existing wife and family which as he works in a tourist city would be living somewhere else in Egypt. If you can rule that one out then you 'won't need to blame yourself for missing the obvious'.
The only way you are going to know for sure if he is married or not is from his indentity card. Now our dear administrators of this site have suspended the search facilty but there is somewhere a posting by Akshar with pictures of what a married and single persons ID card looks like. Anyone know where to find it?
I would be interested in seeing those examples. That is something I could knock out pretty quickly when I get there.
We will be traveling to Alex to meet the family shortly upon my return. His mother will be flying in, and his brother and family live there. Alex is where he was born, and lived until a few years ago.
Posts: 46 | From: Hurghada | Registered: Jun 2009
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