posted
I don't understand some of the posts here. Why is it my business to say whether someone's relationship is real or not? Why do the men say that if all the others don't think like they do their is something wrong, that the man doesn't really love the women? Aren't we all individuals with our own likes and dislikes? Some men can adapt to the western culture more then others. Does that mean he is not for real? I think we can all tell in our hearts of we are truly loved or not. Give Egyptian men a break please!!!!
Posts: 1369 | From: California | Registered: Aug 2007
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bettyN, i think most people aren't being mean just for the sake of it, i know i am not. Unfortunately there are many women who have been left broken (hearted and financally). Of course not all egyptain men are bad (mine is the best) but i do feel that women should warned that there are some men who aren't really men and just use them and they should be careful.
Quote: I think we can all tell in our hearts of we are truly loved or not. ------- it is not always that simple unfortunately.
Maybe i should start a new topic ' what make Egyptain men great'
posted
that happens from all over tbe world not with just egyptian men. My husband was left with many debts from his first wife so it can happen both ways. We all have a gut feeling about things in life. That is what I mean by we can tell in our hearts if we are truly loved. Sure we all need to protect ourselves financially. That us why I did a pre-nup.
Posts: 1369 | From: California | Registered: Aug 2007
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No one except those in the relationship and those people that the parties confide everything in and Allah can know if the relationship is true or not. I know without a doubt i am loved though many on here would say that the relation is not real. And even if i remove everything he does for me to show me he loves me and all of his words, I have our mutual friends that see him without me that tell me how much he loves me. I agree with Betty, no one can judge anothers relation without seeing it first hand and none of us should tell someone that their relation isnt real if we dont have proof otherwise.
posted
Love is when he gets out of bed at 3am to go to the supermarket and get you a bar of chocolate without complaining... Love is when he cooks you breakfast every morning... Love is when he can tell you what you were wearing each time you met... Love is when you make a casual remark and think e isn't listening only for him to act upon it at a later date when you have forgotten about it yourself... Only you can know when he truly loves you...
Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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quote:Originally posted by habeeby: Love is when he gets out of bed at 3am to go to the supermarket and get you a bar of chocolate without complaining... Love is when he cooks you breakfast every morning... Love is when he can tell you what you were wearing each time you met... Love is when you make a casual remark and think e isn't listening only for him to act upon it at a later date when you have forgotten about it yourself... Only you can know when he truly loves you...
Very nice to read! Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by bettyN: I don't understand some of the posts here. Why is it my business to say whether someone's relationship is real or not? Why do the men say that if all the others don't think like they do their is something wrong, that the man doesn't really love the women? Aren't we all individuals with our own likes and dislikes? Some men can adapt to the western culture more then others. Does that mean he is not for real? I think we can all tell in our hearts of we are truly loved or not. Give Egyptian men a break please!!!!
You're asking why? Why should somebody ask a couple of strangers if her relationship is real? Why should somebody enter a messageboard to tell complete strangers about her relationship, no matter good or bad?
Did you ever think about that?
I wouldn't even think about talking here about my relationship in case of troubles. And I also feel no need to tell strangers I am so happy in my marriage. Why would I?
The only reason I should ask people here, is when I shouldn't find answers to my questions regarding Egypt. And I think this is the same for most of us...
Posts: 7202 | From: EU | Registered: Nov 2006
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quote:Originally posted by bettyN: I don't understand some of the posts here. Why is it my business to say whether someone's relationship is real or not? Why do the men say that if all the others don't think like they do their is something wrong, that the man doesn't really love the women? Aren't we all individuals with our own likes and dislikes? Some men can adapt to the western culture more then others. Does that mean he is not for real? I think we can all tell in our hearts of we are truly loved or not. Give Egyptian men a break please!!!!
It's just advice Betty, some may have more experience with the culture here than others. It's really not so black and white as you describe. Posts: 13440 | Registered: Feb 2006
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smuckers it is not anybody's business to tell another whether their relationship is real or not. Like habeeby says "only you can tell if he loves you or not". It is pretty simple, we should all keep our opinions about other relationships real or not to ourselves. It is just that, our opinion. Just because someone is Egyptian doesn't mean they know everything about everyone. Culture has nothing to do with love.
Posts: 1369 | From: California | Registered: Aug 2007
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Of course culture has to do with love, it is part of it! Habeeby entered ES by this topic: I met my Egyptian Soulmate in March - he is the most perfect man i have ever met, sometimes i think too good to be true!!! Anyway i have returned to Egypt 5 times this year (can't get enough of his sweet words) i a now making plans to marry him in February. I can honestly say that i would never even consider an English man again - thumbs up to Arabian Princes -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ES is a public board and people can react on it. So, when somebody places a message, they know there will be reactions. I think it's not about positive reactions, but about the negative ones, right? People are asking questions, she answers. People get a certain impression by it, and warn her for possible disappointments. It is one of the results when you are telling private matters on a public board. She doesn't know the people, and they don't know her or her husband. Some are expierenced, some are not. I can understand that, when she is happy and in love, don't want to hear about the possible bad in her lover. BMID... Okay, let hers be different! I hope he is different! But don't come here to complain when people are trying to be helpfull by warning. When you can't stand that, you don't have to place your message! When I'm placing a topic here, stating the earth is flat, many people will come and say it is round. I can hold on to my opinion for thousands of reasons, and probably get irritated and claim that I didn't even ask for answers.... Sure, but then i had to keep my opinion for myself, and not share it with others! She wanted to tell her story here, and people react. Because it's a messageboard...
-------------------- “Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.” Posts: 7202 | From: EU | Registered: Nov 2006
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If you're going to open up your relationship and all the details attached to it on the internet, be prepared for questions, concerns, judgements...even nastiness. If you don't think you can handle these reactions, don't share intimate details with internet forum folks.
quote:Originally posted by ?????:
quote:Originally posted by bettyN: I don't understand some of the posts here. Why is it my business to say whether someone's relationship is real or not? Why do the men say that if all the others don't think like they do their is something wrong, that the man doesn't really love the women? Aren't we all individuals with our own likes and dislikes? Some men can adapt to the western culture more then others. Does that mean he is not for real? I think we can all tell in our hearts of we are truly loved or not. Give Egyptian men a break please!!!!
You're asking why? Why should somebody ask a couple of strangers if her relationship is real? Why should somebody enter a messageboard to tell complete strangers about her relationship, no matter good or bad?
Did you ever think about that?
I wouldn't even think about talking here about my relationship in case of troubles. And I also feel no need to tell strangers I am so happy in my marriage. Why would I?
The only reason I should ask people here, is when I shouldn't find answers to my questions regarding Egypt. And I think this is the same for most of us...
posted
There is nothing wrong with constructive criticism! I personally have been intrigued to hear different view points on my situation, it is food for thought It does not mean that i am going to act upon any advice i have been given i have a mind of my own but as my fiancee says ' you should never look fom one way try and look from many ways ' Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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<I wouldn't even think about talking here about my relationship in case of troubles. And I also feel no need to tell strangers I am so happy in my marriage. Why would I?>
Double thumbs up!
<ES is a public board and people can react on it. So, when somebody places a message, they know there will be reactions. I think it's not about positive reactions, but about the negative ones, right? People are asking questions, she answers. People get a certain impression by it, and warn her for possible disappointments. It is one of the results when you are telling private matters on a public board. She doesn't know the people, and they don't know her or her husband. Some are expierenced, some are not. I can understand that, when she is happy and in love, don't want to hear about the possible bad in her lover. BMID... Okay, let hers be different! I hope he is different! But don't come here to complain when people are trying to be helpfull by warning. When you can't stand that, you don't have to place your message! When I'm placing a topic here, stating the earth is flat, many people will come and say it is round. I can hold on to my opinion for thousands of reasons, and probably get irritated and claim that I didn't even ask for answers.... Sure, but then i had to keep my opinion for myself, and not share it with others! She wanted to tell her story here, and people react. Because it's a messageboard... >
*does happy dance and cheers* Posts: 1339 | From: Om Leito | Registered: Aug 2006
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posted
It's not about being prepared for advice, or criticism. But how is it anyones place to say hey, i know for sure your relationship is not real because he would not allow this if it were or he would not do this, or he should be doing that... if he is or isnt its not real... that is the thing. Sure its expected people will criticize or say its not right or give advice but to outright say the relationship is a farce is wrong unless you have hard proof otherwise
posted
mysticheart you are a wise person as i am also therefore i take interest in people's opinions but i do not take them to heart. Only i can now if this relationship is real or not and i have told my story and defended my man from the criticism he has received. Unforunately people are only human beings and will be judgmental of other people. Although i can understand why some of the things have been said i know that some of it may be down to how i have presented the situation which may not be in the best light. It has been said that if this man truly loved me he would not allow me to dance with other men but i know that he had no choice in this because and so does he. Not because i do not have respect for him but because he must accept my culture as i accept his and if he were to try and lay the law down he would lose me for sure, he does not wish to lose me so he begrudgingly accepts some of my behaviours. On the other hand i conform to some of his demands in that i cover up when we are together more than i normally would - COMPROMISE!!!
Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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posted
It's not anyone's place to say definitively that a relationship will fail because no one knows the future. But it is unreasonable to not expect harsh criticism/judgement on certain stories that have been told on ES and other forums. Like I said before, if anyone doesn't want to receive this type of criticism then their personal business is best left private. Even close RL friends may give harsh criticism on certain matters.
Choose what you share with the world wisely.
Posts: 2735 | From: my desk | Registered: Jul 2005
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posted
exactly habeeby, most of the relationships on this forum are not typical egyptian relationships they are relations that involve both cultures. Because of that there is always a compromise in what will be allowed and what wont and that doesnt mean a thing as far as the relationship being real or not, if anything it means the relationship is more real because there is a compromise going on.
quote:Originally posted by habeeby: as my fiancee says ' you should never look fom one way try and look from many ways '
This is very sage advice habeeby. This ability to try observing and evaluating situations from different angles is lacking in a lot of people. In a relationship I think it is important to be able to say to your significant other, would you want me to treat you the way you treat me. In turn you should be able to ask the same question to yourself. A relationship is it's own separate entity that needs to be nurtured, it does not exist inside a bubble.
Posts: 1879 | From: Going to Graceland | Registered: Nov 2006
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posted
I know Alchemist this is one of the things that i love about him. He is wise beyond his years and he always has 'good looking' (his words)when we have a problem. He is a very calm and quiet man who thinks before he speaks in contrast i am a loud, hyperactive person who speak before i think. He alwayds tends to bring me good advice in respect of this. Also what i adore about him is if he does not like something that i say or do he will say 'this is the different ways you can look at this, i bring you the advice now you make your decision and i will accept this but you should accept your decision also'. Tome this is a large part of any relationship - COMMUNICATION! I am in a relationship with a man whose first language is not English and who speaks six other languages, i like a lot of English people speak one but i can communicate better with him than i have done with any English man that i have been in a relationship with. Ohhhhhhh i miss him so much now Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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posted
ya know walid is a very handsome man im not all that beautiful i keep thinkin y would a sexy man like him want someone like me hes never had gf never married never sexual relations but yet he knows all my faults i hide nothin from him and still he loves me to some thats wrong not a good thing but ya know u should never tell someone their relation ship is good or bad its not yr place i cant tell u hey yr man is **** dont love him vice versa the human heart works in mysterious ways it knows who we are attracted to and who it wants noone has a perfect relationship no matter how they try and tell themselves its so perfect what yr perfect is may differ from someone else if yr hapy and love the man thats all that matters screw what others think i really care less what people think of me and mine as long as i am happy and he is happy so what we never met so what we talk all the time and see eachother in am so i know he is genuine person not a scammer i call his mom and sisters all the time we send eachother gifts they love me as i am and i them so what they are muslim that has nothin to do with the way i love walid in any relationship there is always obsticals to overcome!!!
-------------------- your ass is so tight when you fart only a dog can hear it.when you queef only a cat can hear that one. Posts: 9776 | From: You like If only mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood. | Registered: Jul 2007
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posted
My feelings are that if i went out on a Saturday night to a bar i would spend half the night fending off men who are looking for a quick sexual encounter and i have never done one night stands and never will. If i did meet someone who i was attracted to i would know as much about him when i met him as i do about Tito (my boyfriend). Who is to say that he is not going to spin me a yarn and break my heart, just because i met him in England does that make him more honest (guffaww) i think not. In fact in my experience Egyptian men do speak sweet words a lot of the time and therefore as our cuture is not used to this we instantly say listen to the crap he is trying to woo me with he is a scammer. However, i think that as an intelligent adult we need to be cautiouse at first until we know this person. Syrely you would adopt this strategy when entering into any relationship. But what when you find out that the sweet words are not to scam you but genuine feelings from the heart. In my case i soak it up and enjoy it, so i have a man that tells me i am beautiful when i know i am not, he tells me i have a voice like angels singing when i know this is not true, what is so bad about that ? I have been in a relationship with an Engishman who sat by the pool eyeing up the other women, Tito has never once looked in the direction of another woman when he is in my company - he says his eyes do not see any other woman because my name is on his heart. The fact that he is a muslim does not come into the relationship i respect his culture and beliefs and he respects mine.
Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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quote:Originally posted by bettyN: I don't understand some of the posts here. Why is it my business to say whether someone's relationship is real or not? Why do the men say that if all the others don't think like they do their is something wrong, that the man doesn't really love the women? Aren't we all individuals with our own likes and dislikes? Some men can adapt to the western culture more then others. Does that mean he is not for real? I think we can all tell in our hearts of we are truly loved or not. Give Egyptian men a break please!!!!
Betty its not about normal hard working Egyptian men in general. The problem revolves around Egyptian men working in the tourist resorts. 90% of those making relationships with foriegn women are players. So statistically speaking when somebody posts her relationship up like Habeeby did then the odds are well stacked against it particularly when she descibes behaviour that is culturally not normal in Egypt......ORFI marriage,.... dancing with other men,.... a job that is culturally unacceptable..... lying to his family about his work etc etc. Maybe her man is different....but it doesn't sound like it.... but by posting she invited comments and that is what ES is here for. She sounds like an intelligent lady that will do what is best for her but there is no harm in doing it with her eyes open.
Posts: 3809 | From: Paradise | Registered: Mar 2003
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posted
this isn't about any particular post in general. I am trying to figure out why people here are so quick to say their is something wrong with other relationships. The egyptian men say the other egyptian men are using the americans for other purposes. Most people seem to dog egyptian men real bad here. I am just wondering why?
Posts: 1369 | From: California | Registered: Aug 2007
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-------------------- “Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.” Posts: 7202 | From: EU | Registered: Nov 2006
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posted
so lets just say because they know their people they are all bad, right? One thing I can say is people think narrow minded.
Posts: 1369 | From: California | Registered: Aug 2007
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bettyN some people only look at a situation from one point of view, yes there are some bad egyptian men but not all. Yes there are some gullible european women but not all. Yes some relationships will end in a broken heart but not all. Unfortunatelly some people do not take all the different options into consideration, they make decisions from a single minded view point. If every european woman listened to the opinions that have been shared here in respect of egyptian men there would never again be any mixed marriages in Egypt - maybe these people work for the egyptian government and this is a pan to keep the blood ine pure ha ha ha Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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posted
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhahaha there is no pure bloodline in the 20th century noone is pure of nothin but **** hahahahaha
-------------------- your ass is so tight when you fart only a dog can hear it.when you queef only a cat can hear that one. Posts: 9776 | From: You like If only mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood. | Registered: Jul 2007
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posted
You know that old song something about the world being a melting pot - well i think that is a fantastic idea if we encourage mixed marriage in the future everybody will be the same colour, then we just have to find a way of dealing with different religions and different cultures i havn't though of a way yet of combatting that problem. Anybody got any ideas?
Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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posted
we will never in mylifetime have same color people hell i wont want a white man lol and as for religion i dont wanna foloow noones religion i wanna pray as i do not as what thers think i should
-------------------- your ass is so tight when you fart only a dog can hear it.when you queef only a cat can hear that one. Posts: 9776 | From: You like If only mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood. | Registered: Jul 2007
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posted
No Tina i wouldn't want a white man either yuk but nobody would be white everybody would be a lovely shade of brown that would get rid of the ideas that still exist in respect of white supremacy. In respect of religion i am an agnostic so i don't really care. I don't need a god to make me respect myself and others i do this because i am a 'such a nice person' ha ha
Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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posted
heheh ok slight shade of brown is fine with me nothin more sexy then a brown man in white tight levis and a nice white crisp shirt woooooooooohooooooo well i dont have a religion too but i do believe in god
-------------------- your ass is so tight when you fart only a dog can hear it.when you queef only a cat can hear that one. Posts: 9776 | From: You like If only mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood. | Registered: Jul 2007
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posted
hmmmmmmmmmmm grrrrrrrrrrrr sorry! still thinking about the cute broen habeeby in the levis, oh my!!!!!!
Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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posted
ooooooooooooooo yes levis and a nice tight asssss
-------------------- your ass is so tight when you fart only a dog can hear it.when you queef only a cat can hear that one. Posts: 9776 | From: You like If only mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood. | Registered: Jul 2007
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posted
The important thing in ES is exchanging information needed, sharing experiences, and little chit chat. ES is like a shoulder to cry on too for me because I like to express my thinking and feeling about anything.
Posts: 756 | From: ...be solution... | Registered: Jul 2007
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quote:Originally posted by habeeby: In respect of religion i am an agnostic so i don't really care. I don't need a god to make me respect myself and others i do this because i am a 'such a nice person' ha ha
Then you can't marry a true Muslim man ...ask him about this one and see what he says.
Posts: 3809 | From: Paradise | Registered: Mar 2003
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-------------------- your ass is so tight when you fart only a dog can hear it.when you queef only a cat can hear that one. Posts: 9776 | From: You like If only mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood. | Registered: Jul 2007
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quote:Originally posted by habeeby: In respect of religion i am an agnostic so i don't really care. I don't need a god to make me respect myself and others i do this because i am a 'such a nice person' ha ha
Then you can't marry a true Muslim man ...ask him about this one and see what he says.
Exactly what I was thinking. Posts: 13440 | Registered: Feb 2006
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posted
Just to say, when i met my fella in egypt it was one of the first serious questions he asked me " Do you neleive in God"
Posts: 306 | Registered: Nov 2007
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posted
I don't think was very clear about my beliefs - i am a christian and when you say do i believe in god, well i believe in a higher being whether you want to call him god, alah mohamamad, jehovah or what is irrelevant to me. I class myself as agnostic because i do not worship ina church i believe that i will be listened to wherever i am so if i wish to 'pray' i do so wherever i am. I live my life by certain principles which are my values - i do not use bad language, i live a clean life, i try to rspect people and treat them the way i would wish to be treated, i have empathy for other peole's situations of diadvantages and i try to be charitable but not in a monetary sense but in a practical way. I am not perfect, i am just a human being but i am not a bad person either. My fiancee has asked me this question and i have told him these things, at first he was a little uncertain about this but as time has gone on he says that he has seen i am a good person with a clear heart and that is the most important thing. I also think that he is a non-practicing muslim in that he does not pray (only during ramadam), he smokes, sometimes he will have a beer, and he is a masseur. i think that if he was a practicing muslim he would not be able to do this work as it is against the muslim beliefs.
Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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quote:Originally posted by habeeby: I don't think was very clear about my beliefs - i am a christian and when you say do i believe in god, well i believe in a higher being whether you want to call him god, alah mohamamad, jehovah or what is irrelevant to me. I class myself as agnostic because i do not worship ina church i believe that i will be listened to wherever i am so if i wish to 'pray' i do so wherever i am. I live my life by certain principles which are my values - i do not use bad language, i live a clean life, i try to rspect people and treat them the way i would wish to be treated, i have empathy for other peole's situations of diadvantages and i try to be charitable but not in a monetary sense but in a practical way. I am not perfect, i am just a human being but i am not a bad person either. My fiancee has asked me this question and i have told him these things, at first he was a little uncertain about this but as time has gone on he says that he has seen i am a good person with a clear heart and that is the most important thing. I also think that he is a non-practicing muslim in that he does not pray (only during ramadam), he smokes, sometimes he will have a beer, and he is a masseur. i think that if he was a practicing muslim he would not be able to do this work as it is against the muslim beliefs.
They both have no morals. They are perfect for each other! Posts: 525 | From: USA | Registered: Sep 2005
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posted
At last!!!! That's what i have been trying to say, 'we are perfect for each other' Posts: 1797 | From: By my husband's side | Registered: Nov 2007
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quote:Originally posted by bettyN: I don't understand some of the posts here. Why is it my business to say whether someone's relationship is real or not?
As soon as somebody posts on a public forum, it's anybody's business to give any opinion they like!!
Posts: 4238 | From: USA | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by habeeby: No Tina i wouldn't want a white man either yuk but nobody would be white everybody would be a lovely shade of brown that would get rid of the ideas that still exist in respect of white supremacy. In respect of religion i am an agnostic so i don't really care. I don't need a god to make me respect myself and others i do this because i am a 'such a nice person' ha ha
good for you two, Actually I am quite happy being white, for a long while I was brainwashed by society too, thinking that I must have a tan or I am ugly, but thank God (yes, I believe in God too) I am now perfectly happy with my whiteness. Incidently, there really isn't much different about an egyptian man who doesn't believe in God and any other men around the world that dont believe in God, Egyptian life is based on religion, that is where the values come from, and that it what most of us love about it. So if you are hoping for a man with good family values, but doesn't care about lots of other things, women, drink, etc etc there are plenty of 'brown' men wearing white shirts on your doorstep - save yourself the heartache of a long distance relationship!
Boy is life a test sometimes! Posts: 644 | Registered: Jul 2007
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yuk but nobody would be white everybody would be a lovely shade of brown that would get rid of the ideas that still exist in respect of white supremacy. In respect of religion i am an agnostic so i don't really care. I don't need a god to make me respect myself and others i do this because i am a 'such a nice person' ha ha
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