posted
She wants to give up prayer as she feels shy before Allaah because she is committing zina
Question: I know that zina is an immoral and evil action, and I feel too shy to stand before Allaah in prayer after doing ghusl for janaabah because of engaging in zina (unlawful sexual relations). I ask Allaah for forgiveness. Believe me, I do not feel happy and content in myself because of what I am doing, but I am trying to soothe my conscience. Should I go back to praying or not, whilst continuing to commit zina?
Answer: Praise be to Allaah.
Undoubtedly zina is one of the major sins, one of the worst crimes, one of the most evil and immoral of actions. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And come not near to unlawful sex. Verily, it is a Faahishah (i.e. anything that transgresses its limits: a great sin, and an evil way that leads one to hell unless Allaah Forgives him)”
[al-Isra’ 17:32]
“And those who invoke not any other ilaah (god) along with Allaah, nor kill such person as Allaah has forbidden, except for just cause, nor commit illegal sexual intercourse and whoever does this shall receive the punishment.
The torment will be doubled to him on the Day of Resurrection, and he will abide therein in disgrace”
[al-Furqaan 25:68-69]
Hence Allaah decrees a severe punishment in this world for those who commit zina, namely the hadd punishment. Allaah says, describing the punishment for the unmarried person who commits zina:
“The fornicatress and the fornicator, flog each of them with a hundred stripes. Let not pity withhold you in their case, in a punishment prescribed by Allaah, if you believe in Allaah and the Last Day. And let a party of the believers witness their punishment.”
[al-Noor 24:2 – interpretation of the meaning]
But for the muhsan (one who is or has been married) who commits zina, the punishment is execution. It says in the hadeeth narrated by Imam Muslim in his Saheeh that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a previously-married man (commits zina) with a previously-married woman, (the punishment is) one hundred lashes and stoning.” (al-Hudood 3199).
Because of the abhorrence and obscenity of this action, even the monkeys are offended by it, and they carried out the hadd punishment of stoning on a monkey which committed zina, as was narrated in Saheeh al-Bukhaari from ‘Amr ibn Maymoon who said: “During the Jaahiliyyah I saw a monkey which had committed zina, so the other monkeys got together and stoned it, and I stoned it with them.” (al-Manaaqib, 5360).
How can an adult, accountable Muslim whom Allaah has honored with Islam be content to stoop to the level of animals and beasts which, whenever their desire is provoked, they satisfy it however they want? The seriousness of this sin is not limited to punishment in this world only, rather the punishment in the Hereafter is far greater and far worse. According to a hadeeth narrated by Imam al-Bukhaari from Samurah ibn Jundub, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Two (angels) came to me last night, woke me up and set out with me… until we came to something like a tannoor (clay oven), in which there was shouting and voices. We looked inside and saw naked men and women, towards whom flames came from beneath them. When the flames reached them, they cried out. I said to them [the two angels], ‘Who are these people?’… They told me, ‘As for the men and women in the structure like a tannoor oven, they are the adulterers and adulteresses…’” (6525).
If a person dies committing this sin, what will be his situation? What will he say to his Lord when he stands before Him for judgement?? Is this the way to give thanks for the never-ending, innumerable blessings of Allaah? Is this the way to give thanks for the blessings of good health? Do you think that Allaah does not see you when you are committing this great sin? Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Truly, nothing is hidden from Allaah, in the earth or in the heaven”
[Aal ‘Imraan 3:5]
Do you not know that these physical faculties with which you are disobeying your Creator will testify against you on the Day of Resurrection? Have you not heard the words of the Compeller (al-Jabbaar):
“Till, when they reach it (Hell-fire), their hearing (ears) and their eyes and their skins will testify against them as to what they used to do.
And they will say to their skins, ‘Why do you testify against us?’ They will say: ‘Allaah has caused us to speak.’ He causes all things to speak, and He created you the first time, and to Him you are made to return”
[Fussilat 41:20-21 – interpretation of the meaning]?
So our answer is that you must hasten to repent sincerely from this great sin, regret deeply what you have done, immediately give it up and give up everything that may lead to it. The causes of zina include the following:
1 – Unveiling and wanton display by uncovering the face, hair or any part of the body. It was narrated in the hadeeth that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There are two types of the people of Hell whom I have not seen… Women who are clothed yet naked, who have gone astray and try to lead others astray also. Their heads look like the humps of camels, leaning to one side. They will never enter Paradise nor even smell its fragrance, although its fragrance may be detected from such and such a distance.” (Narrated by Imam Muslim, al-Libaas wa’l-Zeenah, 3971).
2 – Being alone with a man who is not a mahram for you, because the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No man should be alone with a (non-mahram) woman unless her mahram is present.” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 3842).
3 – Beware of mixing with those whom you are not permitted to mix with, for zina only happens as a result of that. You must pay attention to your conscience and do not pay attention to the whispers of the Shaytaan when he tries to make zina look attractive and to make this crime seem insignificant. The Shaytaan has sworn by Allaah’s Glory that he will mislead the sons of Adam. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“[Iblees (Satan)] said: ‘By Your Might, then I will surely, mislead them all,
Except Your chosen slaves amongst them (i.e. faithful, obedient, true believers of Islamic Monotheism)’”
[Saad 38:82]
The Shaytaan has gained a victory over you in this way, but he will not stop at making you fall into this sin, rather he is striving to make sure that you will abide in Hell for eternity – we seek refuge with Allaah from that – by making the idea of giving up prayer on the basis of this false reasoning seem attractive to you.
Because giving up prayer constitutes kufr or disbelief in Allaah. In Saheeh Muslim it is narrated that Jaabir ibn ‘Abd-Allaah said: “I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say, ‘Between a man and kufr and shirk there stands his giving up prayer.’” (al-Eemaan, 116). And he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The covenant that differentiates us from them is prayer; whoever gives it up is a kaafir.” (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, al-Eemaan, 2545; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Sunan al-Tirmidhi, 2113)
So you have to pray a great deal for forgiveness, repent and make du’aa’. You have to pray regularly and pray a great deal, and strive to be humble and focused in prayer, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“and perform As-Salaah (Iqaamat-as-Salaah). Verily, As-Salaah (the prayer) prevents from Al-Fahshaa’ (i.e. great sins of every kind, unlawful sexual intercourse) and Al-Munkar (i.e. disbelief, polytheism, and every kind of evil wicked deed)”
[al-‘Ankaboot 29:45]
“And perform As-Salaah (Iqaamat-as- Salaah), at the two ends of the day and in some hours of the night [i.e. the five compulsory Salaah (prayers)]. Verily, the good deeds remove the evil deeds (i.e. small sins)”
[Hood 11:114]
You should not think that repentance is too difficult or feel that Allaah will never accept your repentance, for the Shaytaan is keen to sow the seeds of despair in your heart.
You should note that whoever repents, Allaah will accept his repentance and change his bad deeds into good deeds. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Except those who repent and believe (in Islamic Monotheism), and do righteous deeds; for those, Allaah will change their sins into good deeds, and Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.
And whosoever repents and does righteous good deeds; then verily, he repents towards Allaah with true repentance”
[al-Furqaan 25:71]
The gate of repentance is open, and no one can stand between you and repentance. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah will accept the repentance of His slave so long as the death rattle has not yet reached his throat.” (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, al-Da’waat, 3460; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh Sunan al-Tirmidhi, 2802).
Allaah rejoices over this repentance. According to a hadeeth narrated by Imam Muslim in his Saheeh from Anas ibn Maalik, the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah rejoices over the repentance of His slave when he repents more than any one of you would rejoice if he were travelling in the wilderness and his camel which was carrying his food and drink wandered off, and he despaired of ever finding it, then he comes to a tree and lies down in its shade, thinking that he will never see his camel again, then whilst he is like that he sees it standing next to him, so he seizes its reins and says, ‘O Allaah, You are my slave and I am Your Lord!’ making this mistake because he is so happy.” (Baab al-Tawbah, 4932).
Finally, after you have repented you must cut off all the routes that may lead to evil, by means of the way prescribed in sharee’ah which Allaah has permitted, namely marriage. You should note that it is not permissible for a Muslim man or woman to marry a person who has committed zina unless he or she repents to Allaah. If he repents and gives up this sin, then it is permissible for you to marry him after he repents. Please see questions no. 11195 and 2627.
May Allaah help us and you to repent sincerely. And Allaah knows best. May Allaah send blessings and peace upon our Prophet Muhammad.
Islam Q&A
Posts: 1007 | From: http://www.sultan.org | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
um, pretty good answer i guess. a little lengthy to get to the actual answer of her question. Posts: 1967 | From: USA | Registered: Oct 2006
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quote: “Allaah will accept the repentance of His slave so long as the death rattle has not yet reached his throat.” (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, al-Da’waat,
What I don't like about Islam is that it teaches that Muslims, and all people, are Allah's slaves, instead of God's children. A person's surrender in Islam is as slave to master, and not surrender because of the love of child to parent as it should be.
Posts: 3188 | Registered: Feb 2007
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posted
Sigh, what I don't like about Christianity is that it produces evangelical knit twits like yourself
I jest.
Seriously though,I love that Islam teaches that its worshipers completely submit themselves to God- THATS a true believer, and a true follower. It takes alot for a person to overcome their egos and to understand that there is something bigger, and more powerful than them. And once we submit, God takes us into his arms. If we take a step towards him, he runs towards us (this is figurative, by the way) Its a beautiful feeling knowing that you are in the hands of God.
Posts: 1967 | From: USA | Registered: Oct 2006
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posted
Believers and followers of religion are just that. There is no proof that any religion is more true than the next or any prescribed route to God more guaranteed. Followers of religions can submit all they like, to anything they please. Most of the rest of the world is free to disagree and does. Posts: 2953 | From: Slightly south of Azkaban. | Registered: Aug 2006
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quote:Originally posted by sultan.org(In Makka ): How can an adult, accountable Muslim whom Allaah has honored with Islam be content to stoop to the level of animals and beasts which, whenever their desire is provoked, they satisfy it however they want?
Many other fatwas on this site keep telling us that a man's sexual desire is "the most disturbing thing for him", that women have to be ready for their husbands all the time, because suposedly his desire needs to be satisfied immediately and that a man can even beat his wife if she doesn't want sex. Others go to great length explaining that it's pefectly ok for a man to marry four wives and have sex with an unlimited number of female slaves because a man's sex drive supposedly is so strong that he can not be asked to constrain himself.
But here we suddenly read the opposite. Interesting.
quote: Because of the abhorrence and obscenity of this action, even the monkeys are offended by it, and they carried out the hadd punishment of stoning on a monkey which committed zina, as was narrated in Saheeh al-Bukhaari from ‘Amr ibn Maymoon who said: “During the Jaahiliyyah I saw a monkey which had committed zina, so the other monkeys got together and stoned it, and I stoned it with them.” (al-Manaaqib, 5360).
We have to stone people because someone supposedly saw monkeys stoning each other 1400 years ago??? That's the most bizarre thing I've read in a long time.
Besides, didn't they just say above that we should rise above the animal state? But now we should take monkeys as an example?!
quote:
“And those who invoke not any other ilaah (god) along with Allaah, nor kill such person as Allaah has forbidden, except for just cause, nor commit illegal sexual intercourse and whoever does this shall receive the punishment.
The torment will be doubled to him on the Day of Resurrection, and he will abide therein in disgrace”
[al-Furqaan 25:68-69]
This passage says that it's GOD who will do the punishing, not humans.
And did you know, sultan, that the Qur'an requires four witnesses who have seen the actual act? That means, in order for people to be subjected to any punishment for "fornication", they basically have to have sex in public. Why is this important fact not mentioned in this fatwa?
quote: May Allaah help us
May Allah protect us from the insanity of the people who issue such fatwas.
Posts: 3587 | Registered: Mar 2006
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quote: What I don't like about Islam is that it teaches that Muslims, and all people, are Allah's slaves, instead of God's children.
God doesn't have children. We are creatures of God. God created us for a purpose. the purpose is to worship God alone and not associate partners with God. The proofs of singleness of God are countless. If we are children of God, why does God make us get sick, die...? If we are real children to God, then we are Gods. This is impossible. we are NOT Gods. You can't restore the Life of a dead body.
quote: A person's surrender in Islam is as slave to master
God is our master. we Love and glorify our God. God doesn't have any competitors.
quote: There is no proof that any religion is more true than the next or any prescribed route to God more guaranteed.
There are countless proofs around you. Just Look at the sky and try to understand about how this sky was painted in blue color. everything around you certifies the singleness of God. God sends us countless messages in this nature. God sent us sacred books and prophets to be a system of our life. Is not this enough?
quote: Most of the rest of the world is free to disagree and does.
God is testing people. people who manage to pass the test and obey God will succeed and be saved in the judgment day.
quote:Many other fatwas on this site keep telling us that a man's sexual desire is "the most disturbing thing for him", that women have to be ready for their husbands all the time, because suposedly his desire needs to be satisfied immediately and that a man can even beat his wife if she doesn't want sex. Others go to great length explaining that it's pefectly ok for a man to marry four wives and have sex with an unlimited number of female slaves because a man's sex drive supposedly is so strong that he can not be asked to constrain himself.
But here we suddenly read the opposite. Interesting.
The Quote of the fatwa is talking about FORNICATION which is an illegal relation. Legal sex( inside marriage) is a good, pure and correct relation.
quote:We have to stone people because someone supposedly saw monkeys stoning each other 1400 years ago??? That's the most bizarre thing I've read in a long time.
Besides, didn't they just say above that we should rise above the animal state? But now we should take monkeys as an example?!
Monkey and Man are creatures of Allah. If Monkeys are applying the laws of God. why not Man? Man is granted more blessing than Monkeys by the way. It's bizarre that Monkey obeys God and Man doesn't. The laws of God are to be followed.
quote:That means, in order for people to be subjected to any punishment for "fornication", they basically have to have sex in public. Why is this important fact not mentioned in this fatwa?
The Fatwa is not a book. It's an answer to a question.
quote: May Allah protect us from the insanity of the people who issue such fatwas.
May Allah make you understand what is revealed from him.
posted
''We have to stone people because someone supposedly saw monkeys stoning each other 1400 years ago??? That's the most bizarre thing I've read in a long time.'' Dalia
Too too funny. Posts: 2953 | From: Slightly south of Azkaban. | Registered: Aug 2006
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posted
THIS MY ADVICE FOR ALL:if you do any sin don't leave your pray whatever this sin if sin from al kabaier don't leave your PRAY , the condations for al tawba -repentance- 1- leave it now,2-be so repentant from doing it before ,3- don't do it again and pray salat al twba , THANK GOD YOU MADE ME MOSLEM i didn't go to someone and confession coz when he is sin man for whom he have forgiveness !!! to another human can do sins ?
Posts: 88 | From: cairo | Registered: Feb 2007
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quote:Originally posted by sultan.org(In Makka ): The Quote of the fatwa is talking about FORNICATION which is an illegal relation. Legal sex( inside marriage) is a good, pure and correct relation.
You didn't understand the point I was making. I'll explain it again but I doubt you will get it.
The sheikhs on Islam-QA (and many others, for that matter) are creating rulings and loopholes in order to make fornication legal.
Having sex with female slaves, taking more than one wife just because out of the desire for sexual variety, having a mysiar / orfi marriage, telling wifes they are not allowed to refuse sex -- all this is nothing but fornication in my eyes. But it's made *legal* by mysoginistic sheikhs who think man's libido is so important that it needs to be catered to by any means. So they twist Qur'anic verses and come up with biased interpretations in order to make those things legal.
Those people are nothing but hypocrites; an unmarried couple having consensual sex out of love for each other is acting way more *moral* in my humble opinion than a man who forces his wife to have sex or a man taking a second wife because he's bored by his first one and wants some fresh meat, yet feels he's acting in accordance with "God's laws".
Posts: 3587 | Registered: Mar 2006
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quote:Originally posted by sultan.org(In Makka ): The Quote of the fatwa is talking about FORNICATION which is an illegal relation. Legal sex( inside marriage) is a good, pure and correct relation.
You didn't understand the point I was making. I'll explain it again but I doubt you will get it.
The sheikhs on Islam-QA (and many others, for that matter) are creating rulings and loopholes in order to make fornication legal.
Having sex with female slaves, taking more than one wife just because out of the desire for sexual variety, having a mysiar / orfi marriage, telling wifes they are not allowed to refuse sex -- all this is nothing but fornication in my eyes. But it's made *legal* by mysoginistic sheikhs who think man's libido is so important that it needs to be catered to by any means. So they twist Qur'anic verses and come up with biased interpretations in order to make those things legal.
Those people are nothing but hypocrites; an unmarried couple having consensual sex out of love for each other is acting way more *moral* in my humble opinion than a man who forces his wife to have sex or a man taking a second wife because he's bored by his first one and wants some fresh meat, yet feels he's acting in accordance with "God's laws".
Are you a muslim, Dalia? Have you ever read the quran or pronounced The Shahadah?
Posts: 1007 | From: http://www.sultan.org | Registered: Mar 2006
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quote:Originally posted by sultan.org(In Makka ): The Quote of the fatwa is talking about FORNICATION which is an illegal relation. Legal sex( inside marriage) is a good, pure and correct relation.
You didn't understand the point I was making. I'll explain it again but I doubt you will get it.
The sheikhs on Islam-QA (and many others, for that matter) are creating rulings and loopholes in order to make fornication legal.
Having sex with female slaves, taking more than one wife just because out of the desire for sexual variety, having a mysiar / orfi marriage, telling wifes they are not allowed to refuse sex -- all this is nothing but fornication in my eyes. But it's made *legal* by mysoginistic sheikhs who think man's libido is so important that it needs to be catered to by any means. So they twist Qur'anic verses and come up with biased interpretations in order to make those things legal.
Those people are nothing but hypocrites; an unmarried couple having consensual sex out of love for each other is acting way more *moral* in my humble opinion than a man who forces his wife to have sex or a man taking a second wife because he's bored by his first one and wants some fresh meat, yet feels he's acting in accordance with "God's laws".
Are you a muslim, Dalia? Have you ever read the quran or pronounced The Shahadah?
Is that the criteria for her being allowed answers to her questions?
Is that what a Muslim should say to anyone asking questions about Islam?
I am Muslim sultan, I have pronounced my shahadah, now would you mind answering those questions for me please?
Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote: The sheikhs on Islam-QA (and many others, for that matter) are creating rulings and loopholes in order to make fornication legal.
NO, Fornication is illegal on Islam while marriage is permitted.
quote: Having sex with female slaves
This is permited in Quran. I wish you understand that I said permitted not obligatory . Forcing A female slave into Sex is not Permitted in any way.
quote: taking more than one wife just because out of the desire for sexual variety
As long as the second and the first wife accept this, It's non of your business, Dalia. The Quran legalize this issue and not obligate it. Understood? Fact: Females are more than males. If every male marry one female. this is unfair. This is the laws of God in earth. None can alter them.
quote: having a mysiar / orfi marriage
Not permitted and You know. Search in Islamqa.com
quote: telling wifes they are not allowed to refuse sex
The prophet told muslim women it. Wives and Husbands should respect the desires of each others.
quote: an unmarried couple having consensual sex out of love for each other is acting way more *moral*
posted
So you are saying that sex outside marriage is not permitted, then you are saying sex with slave women is permitted, these are contradicting each other.
Didnt Islam abolish slavery?
As for this rubbish:
"As long as the second and the first wife accept this, It's non of your business, Dalia. The Quran legalize this issue and not obligate it. Understood? Fact: Females are more than males. If every male marry one female. this is unfair. This is the laws of God in earth. None can alter them."
There are very clear rules regarding taking more than one wife, having the desire for sexual variety is NOT one of them. Allah also says one is better for you, knowing it would be very difficult for anyone to comply with the rules if one does.
-------------------- If you don't learn from your mistakes, there's no sense making them. Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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posted
Sultan's sick idea of 'God' is so repulsive that it creeps me out. There is something seriously sick behind his ridiculous views. He seems to completely lack a shame gene and harms Islam everytime he copies and pastes more garbage. If he could think for himself, he might see how crazy his pitiful attempts at rational thought are. That isn 't going to happen on ES, as he can't answer the simplest of questions posed by Dalia, Ayisha and others who are a billion times smarter than he will ever be.
Posts: 2953 | From: Slightly south of Azkaban. | Registered: Aug 2006
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posted
A note about the female slaves. It always helps to have a deeper understanding: Islam did not abolish slavery outright but worked on reducing it by stages. At the time of the rise of Islam, having slaves; male and fenale was very common. Slaves were considered assets in financial terms and having sex with female slaves was a long established right.
The way Islam went about to abolish slavery by degrees is by (i) encouraging people to free slaves in return for Godly rewards in heaven (ii) Every sin had several ways of atonement, one of them would usually be to free a slave (male or female) (iii) Every female slave who had borne children to her master achieved protected status by which she was not allowed to be re-sold in the slave market anymore, although she did not officially get to be a free woman, her children would be free people and she would get to live with them and their father in priviliged conditions for the rest of her life
The result of these three strategies was that the circle of slavery kept on getting smaller and smaller until it was all but extinct. However, A look at history would tell you that , unfortunately Saudi Arabia insisted on holding on to the concept of slavery till the nineteen sixties! way after all countries signed to abolish slavery so dont get too hung up about fatwas from Saudi regarding this (Sorry, Sultan...fact is fact) It appears to me that some men were less eager to let go of pleasure chatels and financial assets for the promise of heaven than others.
-------------------- Noha Posts: 670 | From: alex living in leeds, UK | Registered: Jun 2005
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posted
Oh, forgot to say that I was taught at school at the age of 15 that this was the reason why Islam allowed sex with female slaves; it was a way of extricating more people from slavery without causing massive upheaval in the way of life that was already established.
Posts: 670 | From: alex living in leeds, UK | Registered: Jun 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: Allah also says one is better for you, knowing it would be very difficult for anyone to comply with the rules if one does.
The Quran contradicts itself:
On the one hand, it calls for the possibility of marrying four women at the same time
"But if ye fear that you shall not treat them fairly, then only one."
On the other hand, on chapter 4:129 we read:
"You will not be able to deal equally between your wives however much you wish to do so."
In his book, "The Itqan", the Suyuti says,
"In the first verse we understand that fairness is possible while in the second, we perceive that fairness is not possible" (Itqan, part 3, page 85).
This is an obvious contradiction which Muslim scholars, among them the Suyuti, realized and comprehended.
quote:From the Quranic point of view as well as according to Muhammad and the rest of the Muslims, "fairness is possible" to be practiced by the evidence that they got (and still get) married to four women. Even Muhammad’s companions and his successors did so. Therefore, "fairness" seemed to be possible for them because it is not reasonable that all of them, including ’Umar, ’Ali, ’Uthman and Muhammad violated the Quranic teaching.
Then why does the Qur’an say in chapter 4:129 that "fairness" is not possible? This is an obvious contradiction which Muslim scholars, among them the Suyuti, realized and comprehended. In order to solve the problem, the Suyuti argued,
"The first verse (meant) fairness in regard to fulfilling the pledges while the second verse is related to the heart’s inclination and it is not within the ability of a man to be fair in this matter."
The Jalalan (page 82) and Baydawi (page 130) agree with him. The Baydawi reiterates the same statement and adds,
"Muhammad himself was fair with his women in the matter of human rights, but in the inclination of the heart, he used to say to God, ‘Forgive me in regard to that over which I have no control.’"
Because Muhammad, according to all the scholars, favored A’isha over the rest and he did not harbor any inclination toward Sawda bint Zamea. The Zamakh-shari asserts Muhammad’s favoritism for A’isha and states that some people have interpreted the second verse to mean that you cannot be fair in love. Sheik Kashkak indicates in his book of "Opinions" (part 5, page 52), that some favoritism is permissible! Yet, the Zamakh-shari gives another significant opinion when he explicitly says in the Kash-shaf (part 1, pages 568 and 69),
"God has relieved you of (implementing) complete fairness to that which you are able to carry out because it is obligatory to treat the women equally in dividing their portions, expenses and pledges and many other things hardly uncountable. It is something which is beyond (human) ability even if they all were beloved. How would the situation be if the heart inclined toward but some of them!"
Then the Zamakh-shari indicated, "The second verse which indicated that you will not be able to be fair" could mean "to be fair in love" as in what happened to Muhammad and A’isha. Yet, we understand from Zamakh-Shari’s statement that "fairness" is not possible in division of portions, financial support, and pledges even if they were all beloved. How much harder it would be if the man’s heart was inclined to some of them more than others. He said what is really required is to abstain from being fully inclined toward one woman which would be conducive to neglecting the rest of them. Zamakh-Shari’s interpretation here is fully in congruence with the remainder of the verse.
Muslim scholars cited Muhammad as an example, and the issue became more complicated, for what would happen to the poor wife if her husband devoted his love to another wife? She cannot object because, based on the Qur’anic text and by the example set by Muhammad, her husband is innocent of any wrongdoing. The Qur’an asserts that you cannot, from an emotional point-of-view, treat women justly, and Muhammad himself has rejected the request of his daughter, Fatima, to treat all his wives alike and not to bestow on A’isha, his favorite spouse, more than the rest of them. He expressed his favoritism publicly several times. He planned to divorce Sauda (one of his other wives). Some said he already did then he reinstated her when she agreed to relinquish her night for A’isha.
posted
Perhaps using the whole verse and the verse preceeding it will help you understand better.
004.128 YUSUFALI: If a wife fears cruelty or desertion on her husband's part, there is no blame on them if they arrange an amicable settlement between themselves; and such settlement is best; even though men's souls are swayed by greed. But if ye do good and practise self-restraint, Allah is well-acquainted with all that ye do.
004.129 YUSUFALI: Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women, even if it is your ardent desire: But turn not away (from a woman) altogether, so as to leave her (as it were) hanging (in the air). If ye come to a friendly understanding, and practise self-restraint, Allah is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful.
-------------------- If you don't learn from your mistakes, there's no sense making them. Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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Don't worry, Undercover. Men would kill to prove that point....whatdya expect?
But the fact remains that the quran said u cant be fair even if u tried.....Men's ideas are one thing...what the quran says is something else.
But think about it, there are situations where the license for polygamy saves a lot of heartache and allows fairness to everybody...didn't you read Charlotte Bronte's "Jane Eyre"? A sick or mad wife and a husband who doesnt divorce her out of pity but falls in love with the governess, what can he do?
Posts: 670 | From: alex living in leeds, UK | Registered: Jun 2005
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If Monkeys are applying the laws of God. why not Man? Man is granted more blessing than Monkeys by the way. It's bizarre that Monkey obeys God and Man doesn't. The laws of God are to be followed.
Have you ever been to a zoo and watched monkeys? They also masturbate happily in public ... so by your logic I guess we should follow this example as well since they are "applying the law of Allah"?
Posts: 3587 | Registered: Mar 2006
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Nothing about stoning here ... quite the opposite.
The scientific name for the Bonobo is Pan paniscus. As their DNA is more than 98% identical to that of Homo sapiens [3], they are more closely related to humans than to gorillas. Another study on the similarity of critical DNA sites in human and Pan genes suggests that 99.4 percent are identical. (...)
Sexual social behavior
Sexual intercourse plays a major role in Bonobo society, being used as a greeting, a means of conflict resolution and post-conflict reconciliation, and as favors traded by the females in exchange for food. Bonobos are the only non-human apes to have been observed engaging in all of the following sexual activities: face-to-face genital sex (most frequently female-female, then male-female and male-male), tongue kissing, and oral sex. In scientific literature, the female-female sex is often referred to as GG rubbing or genital-genital rubbing, while male-male sex is sometimes referred to as penis fencing.
Sexual activity happens within the immediate family as well as outside it, and often involves adults and children, even infants. Bonobos do not form permanent relationships with individual partners. They also do not seem to discriminate in their sexual behavior by gender or age, with the possible exception of sexual intercourse between mothers and their adult sons; some observers believe these pairings are taboo. When Bonobos come upon a new food source or feeding ground, the increased excitement will usually lead to communal sexual activity, presumably decreasing tension and allowing for peaceful feeding.
Bonobo males frequently engage in various forms of male-male genital sex (frot). One form has two males hang from a tree limb face-to-face while "penis fencing". Frot may also occur where two males rub their penises together while in missionary position. A special form of frot called "rump rubbing" occurs to express reconciliation between two males after a conflict, where they stand back-to-back and rub their scrotal sacks together.
Bonobo females also engage in female-female genital sex (tribadism) to socially bond with each other, thus forming a female nucleus of Bonobo society. The bonding between females allows them to dominate Bonobo society - although male Bonobos are individually stronger, they cannot stand alone against a united group of females. Adolescent females often leave their troop of birth to join another troop. Sexual bonding with other females establishes the new females as members of the group. This troop migration mixes the Bonobo gene pools.
Bonobo reproductive rates are not any higher than that of the Common Chimpanzee. Female Bonobos carry and nurse their young for five years and can give birth every five to six years. Compared with Common Chimpanzees, Bonobo females resume the genital swelling cycle much sooner after giving birth, allowing them to rejoin the sexual activities of their society. Also, Bonobo females who are either sterile or too young to reproduce still engage in sexual activity.
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wow, just off to sainsburys then to play with the cashiers genitals in exchange for food!
-------------------- If you don't learn from your mistakes, there's no sense making them. Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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If Monkeys are applying the laws of God. why not Man? Man is granted more blessing than Monkeys by the way. It's bizarre that Monkey obeys God and Man doesn't. The laws of God are to be followed.
Have you ever been to a zoo and watched monkeys? They also masturbate happily in public ... so by your logic I guess we should follow this example as well since they are "applying the law of Allah"?
These Monkeys are imprisoned and this is illegal . Do you ever know that imprisoning Animals is not allowed?
You can Guess how Man ideology and fake civilization harm Animals. By the way, They inject toxins in animals sometimes to make such Shows in the Zoo.
Islam comes to order us to treat Animal mercifully.
Posts: 1007 | From: http://www.sultan.org | Registered: Mar 2006
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If Monkeys are applying the laws of God. why not Man? Man is granted more blessing than Monkeys by the way. It's bizarre that Monkey obeys God and Man doesn't. The laws of God are to be followed.
Have you ever been to a zoo and watched monkeys? They also masturbate happily in public ... so by your logic I guess we should follow this example as well since they are "applying the law of Allah"?
Islam comes to order us to treat Animal mercifully.
I'm glad you acknowlege that. So I assume you're also opposed to the unneccessary and cruel slaughtering of millions of animals during the Eid and the atrocious treatment of animals in slaughterhouses all around the world? And I take it you're a vegetarian as well or at least buy organic meat and dairy products in order to avoid unnecessary suffering of animals. And whenever you see someone cruelly beating his horse or donkey on the street in Cairo I'm sure you step up and give him a lesson in Islamic teachings regarding animals.
quote:Originally posted by Dalia*: Nothing about stoning here ... quite the opposite.
Science that rejects Islam teaching and authentic texts is corrupted.
This from the person who damages Islam with almost every sentence he copies and pastes.
Posts: 2953 | From: Slightly south of Azkaban. | Registered: Aug 2006
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As long as the second and the first wife accept this, It's non of your business, Dalia. The Quran legalize this issue and not obligate it.
Sisters in Islam welcome the decision of the Selangor Syariah Appeal Court Judgement in the case of Aishah Abd Rauf vs Wan Mohd Yusof Wan Othman. The judgement reflects the true spirit of the teachings of the Qur'an and true practice of polygamy. We would like to point out the popular misconceptions surrounding the Qur'anic verses on polygamy.
Many men believe that polygamy is a God-given right enshrined in the Qur'an; many believe that Islam, by allowing polygamy has found the ideal solution to men's alleged insatiable sexual drive; and many also believe that if a woman allows her husband to take on a second wife, she is assured of a place in heaven.
The Selangor Syariah Appeal Court judgment of Aishah Abdul Rauf v Wan Mohd Yusof Wan Othman brought to public debate these misconceptions which have been mistakenly elevated to be the word of Allah.
Let us point out what the Qur'anic verses on polygamy actually say: “If you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice, two or three, or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them) then only one” (Al Nisa'. 4:3).
A subsequent verse states: “You are never able to be fair and just between women even if that were your ardent desire" (Al Nisa', 4:129).
It is clear from this verse that:
First, the Qur'an does not give men the blanket right to have more than one wife. Polygamy is not a right, but a responsibility to ensure that socio-justice be done to orphans. What Allah has granted is in fact a restriction on existing practice of that time when men could marry as many wives they wanted.
Second, because polygamy is not a right, Allah placed conditions on its practice. There is an overiding concern for justice in this short verse. Conditions are set to ensure that justice is done.
Condition A: Polygamy is permitted within the context of war and orphans. It is permitted only if the men fear they would not be able to deal justly with the orphans.
Condition B: The man who wants to be polygamous must have the capacity to be fair and just to all his wives. The verse is a call for just conduct towards women, not a right for men to fulfil their alleged lustful desires or their ego. And just treatment here means more than a man's financial capacity to a support more than one wife. He must be fair in all ways, including the time, support and companionship he provides to the wives and children.
Condition C: If the man fears he cannot deal justly with all his wives, then Allah advocates that he should marry only one as this will prevent injustice. This is explicitly stated in the verse.
Third, it is often forgotten that there was a socio-historical context within which the verse was revealed. That context was a period of tragedy in Islam after the battle of Uhud when dozens of men from the still formative Muslim community in Medina were killed in one day. Numerous women and children were left without support. To deal with this problem, Allah revealed the verse permitting men to be polygamous. Given the tragedy of the battle of Uhud, Allah could have sanctioned the existing practice of unlimited polygamy; but instead, while allowing men to be polygamous, Allah restricted the number to four.
We wish to emphasise that the clear intention in the Qur'an is to restrict polygamy.
Unfortunately, in practice, the restrictions imposed in the Qur'an have often not been applied and the context within which the verse was revealed has been completely overlooked.
By stressing the need for just conduct toward women and the need for equal treatment of each wife and recognising the difficulty, if not the impossibility, of doing so (4:129), this verse, in fact advocates monogamy as the original and ideal state of marriage in Islam.
There is also nothing in the Qur'an to support the popular misconception that women who allow their husbands to take a second wife will go to heaven.
As far as our research shows, no authoritative hadith exists to support this misconception. Nevertheless, this belief is often used to persuade women that it is their religious obligation to accept their husbands’ polygamy. This is a destructive tactic to manipulate women into feeling that they would be bad Muslim wives if they object to their husbands’ polygamy. Finally, we would like to emphasise that it is reprehensible for Muslims to say that polygamy is Islam’s solution for men's alleged unbridled lust. Islam teaches self-control, self-discipline and self-purification. The solution to an immoral society, whether in the West or in the Muslim world, is not polygamy. The solution, as found in the Qur'an and the hadith, is a change of attitude from indulging in promiscuity to one of self-discipline and respect for the opposite sex. We urge our sisters and brothers in Islam to go back to the Qur'an and read its words carefully. To allege that the recent judgement of the Selangor Syariah Appeal Court is against Hukum Syarak is a gross denial of the true intent and spirit of justice so insistantly enjoined by the Qur'an.
Sisters In Islam Kuala Lumpur 20 August 1990 Published in: The Star, New Straits Times, Berita Harian and Utusan Melayu
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Many Muslim nations which now consider polygamy unconstitutional have justified such changes in legislation on the basis of the overall Qur'anic perspective on marriage, as well as on modern Islamic perspectives of marriage. The marriage of subjugation at the time of revelation was premised on the need for females to be materially provided for by some male. The ideal male for a female child was the father, and for the adult female, the husband. This economic perspective of marriage - as indicated by several verses discussed above - will also be reviewed here with regard to polygamy.
If you fear that you will not deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice, two, three or four. But if you fear that you will not be able do do justly (with them),then only one, ... to prevent you from doing justice. (4.3)
First, this verse is about treatment of orphans. Some male guardians, responsible for managing the wealth of orphaned female children, were unable to refrain from unjust management of that wealth. (4:2). One solution suggested to prevent mismanagement was marriage to the female orphans. On the one hand, the Qur'an limited this number to four, and on the other hand, the economic responsibility of maintaining the wife would counterbalance the access to the wealth of the orphaned female through the responsibility of management. However, most proponents of polygamy seldom discuss it within the context of just treatment of orphans.
In fact, as far as they are concerned, the only measurement of justice between wives is material - can a man equally support more than one wife? This is an extension of the archaic idea of marriages of subjugation, because fairness is not based on quality of time, equality in terms of affection, or on spiritual, moral, and intellectual support. These general terms of social justice are not considered with regard to just treatment with wives.
It is especially clear that this verse is concerned with justice: dealing justly, managing funds justly, justice to the orphans, and justice to the wives, etc. Justice is the focus of most modern commentaries concerned with polygamy. In the light of the verse 4:129 - "You are never able to be just and fair as between women ..." - many commentators assert that monogamy is the preferred marital arrangement of the Qur'an. Surely, it is impossible to attain the Qur'anic ideal with regard to mutuality ("They (feminine plural) are raiment for you (masculine plural) and you are raiment for them" (2:187)), and with regard to building between them "love and mercy" (30:21), when the husband-father is split between more than one family.
Finally, with regard to three common justifications given for polygamy, there is no direct sanction in the Qur'an. One is financial: in the context of economic problems such as unemployment, a financially capable man should care for more than one wife. Again, this assumes that all women are financial burdens: reproducers, but not porducers. In today's world a lot of women neither have nor need male supporters. For one thing, it is no longer accepted that only men can work, do work, or are the most productive workers, in all circumstances. With regard to work outside the home, i.e. paid employment, the market is based on productivitiy. Productivity in turn is based on a numer of factors, and gender is only one of them. Surely, polygamy is no simple solution to complex eoconomic problems.
Another rationale given for a man having more than one wife centres on the woman who is unable to have children. Again, there is no mention of this as a rationale for polygamy in the Qur'an. However, the desire for children is natural. Thus, consideration for the barren man and the barren woman should not exclude either from the chance of marriage, nor from the care and upbringing of children. What possible solution is mutually available when the wife or husband is sterile and the couple cannot have their own children?
In a world of war and devastation, there are still orphaned Muslim (and other) children who would benefit from the love and care of childless couples. Perhaps caring for all of the earth's children might be practised by Muslims in the light of global catastrophes still unresolved. One's own blood relations are important, but perhaps not in terms of the final judgement of one's ability to care and nurture.
Finally, the third rationale given for polygamy not only has no sanction in the Qur'an but is clearly un-Qur'anic as it attempts to sanction men's unbridled lust: that if a man's sexual needs cannot be satisfied by one wife, he should have two. Presumably, if his lust is greater than that, he should have three, and on until he has four. Only after this fourth are the Qur'anic principles of self-constraint, modesty, and fidelity finally to be exercised.
As self-constraint and fidelity are required at the onset for the wife, these moral virtues are equally significant for the husband. It is clear that the Qur'an does not stress a high, civilized level for women while leaving men to interact with others at the basest level. Otherwise, the mutual responsibility of khilafah (trusteeship) would be left to one half of humanity while the other half remains near the animal state.
Amina Wadud: "Qur'an and Woman. Rereading the Sacred Text from a Woman's perspective"Posts: 3587 | Registered: Mar 2006
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Just so you know; In Egypt, where the Islamic sharia'a is the origin of legislation according to the Egyptian constitution, the marraige contract allows you to put in it any conditions you may want to enforce. You could easily add a restriction on polygmy! This is based on the fact that, in Islam, a marriage in which the woman feels hard done by is unconditionally allowed annulment. This was the argument that passed it through the legislative committee. You can check a blank copy of marriage documents in Egypt if you want proof.
However, I must add that this law was introduced relatively recently so dont go looking for it in old marriage documents. At about the same time, a law guaranteeing unconditional annulment for women who apply for it was instated.
-------------------- Noha Posts: 670 | From: alex living in leeds, UK | Registered: Jun 2005
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Polygamy has been a very controversial issue in Islam. The Orthodox 'Ulama maintain that it is part of Islamic Shari'ah and hence men can take upto four wives, if they want to, without any reasonable cause even. The modernists and champions of women's rights, on the other hand, argue that polygamy is only permissible in certain conditions with the strict proviso for equal justice with all the wives. According to the modernists, man just cannot take more than one wife simply because he likes some other woman or gets enamoured of her beauty. They also argue that the Qur'anic norm is monogamy but polygamy is permissible in certain exceptionable circumstances with strictly enforceable condition for justice.
The orthodox 'Ulama justify polygamy on the grounds which have not been stated in the Qur'an. They argue that men's sexual needs are greater than those of women; secondly, they argue that women go through periods or give birth to children and it is not possible to have sexual intercourse with them during these periods and hence man needs more than one wife. They also argue that if a woman is terminally ill it is better to marry another woman rather than divorce her and make her psychological wreck. Also, if she is barren and cannot give birth to another child, it is better to take second wife without divorcing her and add to her woes. She already suffers from lack of children.
Of course, as pointed out above, these arguments are not there in Qur'an or sunnah of the Prophet (PBUH). These arguments have been invented by some 'Ulama to justify polygamy.
Apart from these arguments, they also argue that there are more women than men and hence polygamy ensures dignified life for women rather than life of infamy and breaching the limits set by Allah.
The modernists and those championing women's rights, on the other hand, rebut all these arguments. They argue that it is not at all biologically and scientifically proven that women's sexual needs are any less than that of man. It is her social conditioning, which makes her sexually less active. Given proper environment a woman will also be equally sexually active.
The champions of women's rights also maintain that man is not created a mere sexual animal that he cannot restrain his sexual activity during menstrual period of his wife or when she gives birth to a child. Thousands of men do so. All men are not prone to polygamous marriages. Most of them, on the contrary, are monogamous. They can restrain themselves from sexual activity even when their wives are ill for long time and cannot cohabit with them. Even when they are terminally ill, they can go without sexual activity and this sacrifice is worth making for a life time partnership. One cannot sacrifice this companionship just because she is terminally ill or is not capable of cohabitation. Those upholding women's rights argue that marriage is not all about sexual gratification only. The institution of marriage is much more than that. It is for life long partnership between the two, besides creating children and ensuring continuity of human life on earth.
This can be ensured with minimum sexual activity. In fact polygamy is a medieval institution, which was invented by man to fulfil his sexual lust and to keep women under his authority.
As for barrenness there seems to be some weight in taking another wife to procreate, as procreation is one of the objectives of marriage. But, in our society often blame is foisted on woman for failing to give birth to child. Man can also be barren and man often is. Unless it is medically tested one should not rush to the conclusion that woman is barren and hence man should take another wife to have children. Only and only when it is proved that a wife has medical problem in giving birth to a child or is completely barren she could be responsible for lack of child. Perhaps then there could be some justification for taking second wife. But thanks to modern scientific advances there are other possibilities: test tube babies. May be there is no ijma' so far about Islamic validity of test tube baby.
We will have to leave it to the conscience of the persons concerned whether they would like to have test tube bay or not. Similarly adoption is also not permissible in Shari'ah law. Here is some bind for a conscientious Muslim. One can say in such case (i.e., when it is medically certified that wife, and not husband, is barren) husband could be permitted to take second wife. The other alternative is to remain childless. Some might prefer that way. Only when a wife is proved to be medically unfit for conceiving the husband perhaps could seek her permission (without using coercion in any form) to take second wife and provided, he is capable of doing equal justice to both of them, as required by the Qur'an.
Another argument for polygamy is that rather than let women lead sinful life it is better that one takes them as co-wives. Firstly there are very few societies wherein there are many more women than men. Even if there are more women, it is marginally so. Only during world wars when millions of people were killed there were substantially more women, than men. But it was a temporary and not lasting period. Perhaps there could have been some justification for polygamy during that period. But it is not correct to say that prostitution is because of more women in society than men. There is prostitution even when there is excess of men over women. ?In India, for example, there is excess of men over women there being 1000 men for every 930 women and yet there is widespread prostitution. There are other reasons for prostitution than excess of women over men in a society. Prostitution has been in the world throughout history. In fact it is known as one of the oldest institutions in the world. Uneven distribution of wealth, migration of men to other countries or to urban areas in search of livelihood and extreme poverty in women's families, lax morals and organised crime are some of the factors responsible for prostitution. Mere polygamy, as some knively believe, cannot eradicate prostitution from the society. Even stringent law drives it underground rather than abolish it.
Thus all these arguments in favour of polygamy are hardly valid. These arguments have been invented for justifying polygamy; they hardly explain its existence. There are reasons other than the ones advanced above for persistence of this institution for so long. One must understand those causes and try, as much as possible, to control and regulate the institution of polygamy.
The Qur'an And Polygamy
Then one can justifiably ask why Qur'an permits it? Or what view the Qur'an takes of polygamy? One must take up the verses on polygamy in the Qur'an and explain them not merely as isolated verses but in the total spirit of the Qur'an. No verse of the Qur'an can be explained as an isolated verse. It is the context (in the light of asbab al-nuzul, i.e., occasions of revelation) and norms of the Qur'an which have to be taken into account in order to understand the real intention of the Qur'anic verses. Also, it is not enough to refer to one verse on the subject but all concerned verses should be taken into account. Often one verse is quoted to prove one's point of view. It is not proper.
There are two verses in the Qur'an as far as multiplicity of wives is concerned, i.e., 4:3 and 4:129. However, to take an overall view of Qur'anic spirit we will have to take more verses into account besides these two. Those other verses are equally important to determine the Qur'an approach to the controversial issue of polygamy.
First let us take the two verses which make direct pronouncement on polygamy, i.e., 4:3 and 4:129. The first verse, i.e., 4:3 appears to permit taking up to four wives while 4:129 seems to caution against hazards of multiplicity of wives. Needless to say both the verses must be read together in order to determine Allah's intention. While the first verse takes given context into account and seems to permit multiplicity of wives, the second one takes long term view and also the likely consequences of taking second wife and this verse tends to be more normative than the other.
The first verse says: "And if you have reason to fear that you might not act equitably towards orphans, then marry from among women such as are lawful to you - two or three, or four: but if you have reason to fear that you might not be able to treat them with equal fairness, then (only) one - or those whom you rightfully possess." (4:3). This verse could be interpreted differently. It is not very clear whether it means two or three or four at a time or during ones lifetime. If up to four was meant it could have said "upto four". But the Qur'an rather chooses more complex way of putting it.
Even if what is meant is two or three or four at a time, the Qur'an does not permit it according to the whims of a man. It lays down strict condition for treating all wives with equal fairness and if you have reason to fear that they cannot be treated with equal fairness then marry only one. Thus if one reads even this verse alone literally, it would be obvious that more emphasis is on equal and fair treatment rather than having more than one wife. And this should not be determined by husband alone whether he can treat his wives with equal fairness or not.
Here in this verse the words "if you have reason to fear that you might not be able to treat them with equal fairness" are addressed to whole Muslim society and hence society as represented by its judicial institutions ('adalah) will determine whether the person has capability to treat his second or third or fourth wife with equal fairness or not and also whether there is any need for it. Thus it is obvious that taking of more than one wife should be socially regulated and should not be an individual decision. Unfortunately often decision is made individually as if it is personal privilege and no social intervention can be tolerated. The Qur'anic spirit, on the other hand, does require social intervention as equitable and fair treatment of wives is very essential.
There is also debate whether equitable and fair treatment implies only equal maintenance and equal facilities to all the wives or it also includes equal love. Some commentators, especially of the Mu'tazilah persuasion insist that equal love is also a necessary condition for all wives.
And they argue that since equal love is humanly impossible (a man will always tend to love one of his wives more than the other wife or wives) polygamy is as good as banned by the Qur'an. Justice in treating all the wives equally is so important that the verse ends with the words alla ta'ulu (this is more proper that you may not do injustice.
Thus in verse 4:3 fear of injustice is stressed twice. Thus this moral dimension of polygamy cannot be taken lightly. Therefore, either it should be banned or should be strictly regulated or taking of second wife should not be left entirely to an individual. Social intervention is highly needed.
Also, the verse 4:3 should be read in conjunction with another verse on polygamy i.e. 4:129. This verse states, among other things, "Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women even if it is your ardent desire. But turn not away (from a woman) altogether so as to leave her (as it were) hanging (in the air). If ye come to a friendly understanding, and practice self-restraint, Allah is oft-forgiving and Merciful."
This verse is so clear on the question of justice and fair treatment with all wives that polygamy is almost impossible to practise. The words that you cannot do justice "even if it is your ardent desire" are so clear that there is no need for any further discussion. It is humanly impossible to treat all wives equitably (especially in matters of love) and one should not leave one woman hanging in the air and incline totally towards the other. Here it is important to point out the Qur'anic methodology in social matters like slavery, polygamy and similar other matters. At the first stage the Qur'an permits an existing practice with proviso for reforms and improvement so as to lessen its negative impact but subsequently it points out in no uncertain language that it is best be abolished. A good example in this respect is of slavery. The Qur'an first requires Muslims to treat slaves in a humane way and also encourages their manumission as compensation for not able to keep obligatory fast or for expiation of sins etc. Bu subsequently it says that "All children of Adam have been honoured equally (laqad karramna bani Adam) (17:70). Thus all children of Adam deserve equal dignity and some cannot be slaves and others master. This makes institution of slavery totally redundant. But the Qur'an first accepts institution of slavery with necessary reforms and subsequently makes it clear that it is against human dignity.
Similarly approach has been adopted for the institution of polygamy. First it is permitted with strict proviso for fair and equal treatment and cautioning against injustice against any of the wives. It is also important to note that this verse (i.e.4:3) has been revealed along with the verse pertaining to the problems of widows and orphans (yatam). This verse on polygamy begins with the words "If you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice, two or three or four…."
Thus polygamy was permitted by the Qur'an to do away injustice to orphans and widows (actually the Arabic word yatama includes widows also). The Arabs, as per Zamakhshari of Al-Kasshshaf (Vol. I, Beirut, 1977, pp-496), would marry orphans and widows with beauty and wealth (far in excess of four women) and then try to usurp their wealth and do injustice to them in treatment. The Qur'an, in order to save these orphans from such injustices (and hence it begins with the words (If you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with orphans….) those Arabs were permitted to marry up to four (thus reducing the number of wives one could take drastically) to avoid injustice to the orphans.
Thus polygamy (without any restriction as to the number of wives) already existed in the society and also injustices to the orphans. Thus with this verse (4:3) the Qur'an, which considers justice as most fundamental moral category, tried to stop abuse of orphan girls' properties (and this was vitally necessary) on one hand, and injustices to the women who were taken as wives without restriction to any number, and not treated fairly and equitably. This verse thus accomplished two objectives in one stroke - justice to orphans and justice to helpless wives by restricting their numbers to four and requiring oral responsibility of equal and fair treatment.
But, the Qur'an was aware that this is not the ideal solution as far as women were concerned. Thus in the second verse on polygamy (4:129) it was made clear that it is not possible to do equal justice to all wives even if one ardently desired and so the men were cautioned not to leave the first wife hanging in the air (fatazaruha kal mu'allaqatin). Thus, if both the verses are read together - and one must - monogamy would be the norm and polygamy a merely permitted measure to meet the given situation.
Thus the real intention of the Qur'an, is to ultimately abolish polygamy albeit gradually. It is also to be noted that marrying orphans to misappropriate their properties was peculiarly an Arab phenomenon, not a universal one. And polygamy was permitted by the Qur'an only in that context. It has also been pointed out by some commentators that the verse 4:3 was revealed after the battle of Uhud when more than 10% of Muslim men population was killed and there were many orphans and widows in the society and they had to be taken care of. Perpetuation of polygamy forever was far from the Qur'anic intention.
Thus the noted translator of the Qur'an Abdullah Yusuf Ali also says in the footnote to the above verse (4:3), "The unrestricted number of wives of the 'Times of ignorance' was now strictly limited to a maximum of four, provided you could treat them with perfect equality, in material things as well as in affection and immaterial things. As this condition is most difficult to fulfil, I understand recommendation to be towards monogamy." (The Holy Qur'an, Abdullah Yusuf Ali, Vol. I, Hyderabad, India, n.d.pp-131)
More arguments can be advanced from other verses of the Qur'an if one takes the Qur'anic verses in totality as one must. The Qur'an uses the word zawj for husband and wife and zawj implies couple. So basically there should be one husband and wife - a couple - and not one husband and several wives. Adam, the first Prophet had one wife Hawwa'. The Qur'an also describes husband and wife as each other's garment (2:187). Also the Qur'an says, "And the believers, men and women, are friends one of another. They enjoin good and forbid evil and keep up prayer and pay the poor-rate and obey Allah and His Messenger." (9:71)
Whole spirit of this verse is of equality and friendship between men and women. Thus this noble spirit of the Qur'an in respect of man and woman does not admit of four women being lorded over by one man. Also the verse 33:35, which makes men and women equal in every respect hardly, can admit the institution of polygamy. Also, 2:228 establishes equality between men and women and can hardly admit of the polygamous marriages. Thus it will be seen that all these verses militate against polygamy. Polygamy can at best be an exception rather than a rule. As for the Holy Prophet's sunnah is also concerned he preferred monogamy over polygamy. He remained highly faithful to his first wife Khadijah as long as she lived though she was much senior (by fifteen years) to him. He never took a second wife in her lifetime. He was a very loyal and devoted husband. He married A'ishah only after the death of his first wife Khadijah. And A'ishah was the only virgin wife he took. All other wives were either divorcees or widows and were more in the nature of political and tribal alliances than marriages for fulfilling sexual needs. Had he so desired he could have taken young women as his wives. But he never did after A'ishah.
He also strongly disapproved of Hazrat Ali, husband of his daughter Fatima, taking a second wife during her lifetime. He was very angry when he learnt that Ali wanted to take a second wife when Fatima was around. All this goes to show that the Prophet (PBUH) also stressed monogamy and one must follow his sunnah in this respect also.
Today's Qur'anic approach to justice and equality is much more relevant than before. Women's rights are being greatly stressed and if their rights to equality are to be respected, and one must, polygamy should be permitted only in highly exceptional circumstances. Actually monogamy should be the rule. The Qur'an foresaw this 1400 years ago and stressed the concept of justice in sexual relations also and never accepted woman to be subordinated to man. The Qur'an, in fact gave dignity to woman by accepting her legal entity. However, through the ages she lost out to man in sexual politics. There is a great need to restore dignity to her which is a fundamental requirement of the Qur'an. She is an equal partner to man in every respect
posted
Excuse me how many wives did the Rasulullah (SAW ) have?
Excuse me how many wives did the Sahaabah (RA ) have?
Excuse me how many wives did the Tabieen (RA ) have?
Excuse me how many wives did the taba tabieen (RA ) have?
All of the knew the Quran and Sunna better than some Joe Smuck today telling you that:
quote:In fact (not) polygamy is a medieval institution, which was invented by man to fulfil his sexual lust and to keep women under his authority.
What a load of crap! Follow the best example the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) and his companions and you will be successful..NOT some Joe Smuck Commentator Yusuf Ali..LOL..Where is my Ibn Kathir Tafsir?
-------------------- 'Abdullah bin 'Umar said, "Allah's Apostle (صلى الله عليه و سلم) took hold of my shoulder and said, "Be in this world as if you were a stranger or a traveller." Posts: 2342 | From: Its not where I'm from but where Im going | Registered: Jul 2007
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posted
sands you are not a prophet, sorry to burst your bubble. The prophet married for political reasons and it was limited to 4. He already had more than 4 but wasnt allowed to get rid of any, but was to have no more. There are a few words after Allah allows you 4, read them without going fuzzy after you read you can have 4. It says ONE IS BETTER FOR YOU.
-------------------- If you don't learn from your mistakes, there's no sense making them. Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Somewhere in the sands: Where is my Ibn Kathir Tafsir?
Here is your twisted kathir on 4:3,
"(two or three, or four), means, marry as many women as you like, other than the orphan girls, two, three or four."
see he misinterprets 2, 3 or 4 to mean as many as you like. What a wonderful man, he has contributed so much in the changing of Allah's words. What a wonderful meeting he will have with Allah. Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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posted
Oh no wait! He now compares it to angels wings!
"(Who made the angels messengers with wings, - two or three or four) [35:1], does not mean that other angels do not have more than four wings, as there are proofs that some angels do have more wings."
wonder how many he saw to get to that conclusion?
Oh NOW he decides it does only mean 4
"Yet, men are prohibited from marrying more than four wives, as the Ayah decrees, since the Ayah specifies what men are allowed of wives, as Ibn `Abbas and the majority of scholars stated. If it were allowed for them to have more than four wives, the Ayah would have mentioned it.
Imam Ahmad recorded that Salim said that his father said that Ghilan bin Salamah Ath-Thaqafi had ten wives when he became Muslim, and the Prophet said to him, "Choose any four of them (and divorce the rest).''
hhhmmm so these women are divorced for doing nothing wrong??
methinks Mr Kathir and his 'scholars' still see women as cattle to be owned and abandoned, maybe they should try reading Quran?
-------------------- If you don't learn from your mistakes, there's no sense making them. Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: "(two or three, or four), means, marry as many women as you like, other than the orphan girls, two, three or four."
see he misinterprets 2, 3 or 4 to mean as many as you like.
I guess your understanding of what he meant depends how you read the commas in this English translation of what he wrote. There is more than one way to read that sentence.
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