Hope it all works out. My two penneth: listen to ALL of the advice - the stuff you want to hear and the stuff you're not so comfortable with - think it over, ask your chap questions, lots and lots and lots and lots. See if you're happy with the answers... then you go right ahead and do exactly what you wanna because at the end of the day, it's your life I'm a great believer in trusting your gut and giving life a shake and getting everything you can out of it in the short time we're here
Good luck Posts: 1678 | From: New Egypt Forum - http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Dec 2009
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posted
But keep your heart open and your wallet shut
By which I don't mean don't pay your share if out or visiting, but his mother, auntie, grandad's cousin do not need operations at the most expensive hospital in Egypt and he doesn't need 15000LE to keep him out of prison simply because he was standing within half a mile of a fight.
And he doesn't need a cow - really.
Posts: 5593 | From: Egypt | Registered: Dec 2005
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And actually, he already owns two buffalo so no need to buy him any of those He gave his brother the money needed to finish his house last year and he is half way through building his own.
His family are very well... ooh, come to think of it the last time I was there his mum had a really bad cold, although there were no hints of hospitals. I did however give her some of my paracetamol & ibuprofen. Do you think she swindled me out of this?!
Seriously, joking aside I really appreciate all your help/advice (with the exception of some who clearly just like to rain on anyone's parade) and I do take it all in, even the not so good bits.
I'm glad you all had a good chat while I was away, has anyone tried the Avon SSS soft and fresh dry oil spray?? I've tried it and it worked for me, and I know others who swear by it too. Doesn't smell too bad either Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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posted
Well thank goodness you aren't dating someone from the UK. Administering drugs to his mother in law? Are you medically qualified? Are you insured? Good god, woman, are you mad? I smell a law suit in the making. Cue the anaphalactic shock
Sure I spelt that wrong but it's getting way too late for me...
You gotta do what you gotta do - don't let any one else try to tell you what that is - tis the whole point. You have to work that one out for yourself.
Ok, I'll say this. I met an Egyptian I rather liked about 18 months ago, and in all honesty, didn't have a clue what to expect. Talk about Venus and Mars. Not when we were together - not when we talked - we were on the same page. Scarily on the same page. Nah, the "differences" crept in when I talked to other folk at home and (particularly) when I read crap online. I considered converting (reverting?) what have you, changing all sorts about me to try to jump throught these hoops which I felt duty bound to jump through... but actually, looking back, I'm not sure were ever there. I read up on the religion and saw myself wearing a hijab, never eating pork and never drinking again. If you read about it and don't talk about it you'll scare yourself to death - particularly if you just read stuff online - I'd say DON'T READ ABOUT ISLAM ONLINE PERIOD (Daniel Pipes - don't even go there!). You'll stumble across all kinds of BS - music is banned, art is banned, smiling is banned, breathing is banned. This isn't Egyptians at all - not that I've seen. These people have probably the best sense of humour of any nationality I've ever come across. My fairly religious, T total Egyptian boyfriend (ooh I said the 'b' word) is now an ardent follower of Father Ted. Close second is Borat. Don't believe everything (or anything) you read online. They're adaptable, amenable, so kind - meh - you know all this for yourself, I'm sure, but there's a hell of a lot more to them than the brick wall you'd be led to believe. They're a lot more maleable than you might think
Talk about it. Read books - ah I started a Penguin one but then I got annoyed where the Sunnis and Shi'ites started falling out (why do all religions do this? My version is better - no it isn't - mine is? Can't be doing with it)... So I just started talking to him about it instead - let him tell you what it means to him. It doesn't have to be for you but you have to be able to live with it, at least.
Decide what you're going to compromise on (i.e. upbringing of any kids - someone's realistically going to have to give a bit - might seem a long way off but hypothetical discussions don't hurt). Decide what you're not going to compromise on (you know really - you shouldn't give up who you are. If you're marrying an Egyptian Muslim you're going to have to be understanding of his culture so if he's decided to marry a western Christian or aetheist or what have you - same thing follows).
Dalia gave me very good advice when I first arrived here with my little head spinning all over the place. Just stay true to yourself above all else then the rest of it should follow. Que sera sera and all of that. But ES is great for getting the background on Egypt. Don't be in a huge rush to get to the end - life's all about the journey Posts: 1678 | From: New Egypt Forum - http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Dec 2009
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quote:Originally posted by Sponge: Seriously, joking aside I really appreciate all your help/advice (with the exception of some who clearly just like to rain on anyone's parade) and I do take it all in, even the not so good bits.
Hmmmmm..... who and what do you mean in specific? Seriously what kind of replies didn't sit too well with you?
You came on here and asked people for their opinions. If you wanted just to hear marvellous things you should have said so in your very first posting.
Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Monkey: Well thank goodness you aren't dating someone from the UK. Administering drugs to his mother in law? Are you medically qualified? Are you insured? Good god, woman, are you mad? I smell a law suit in the making. Cue the anaphalactic shock
Sure I spelt that wrong but it's getting way too late for me...
You gotta do what you gotta do - don't let any one else try to tell you what that is - tis the whole point. You have to work that one out for yourself.
Ok, I'll say this. I met an Egyptian I rather liked about 18 months ago, and in all honesty, didn't have a clue what to expect. Talk about Venus and Mars. Not when we were together - not when we talked - we were on the same page. Scarily on the same page. Nah, the "differences" crept in when I talked to other folk at home and (particularly) when I read crap online. I considered converting (reverting?) what have you, changing all sorts about me to try to jump throught these hoops which I felt duty bound to jump through... but actually, looking back, I'm not sure were ever there. I read up on the religion and saw myself wearing a hijab, never eating pork and never drinking again. If you read about it and don't talk about it you'll scare yourself to death - particularly if you just read stuff online - I'd say DON'T READ ABOUT ISLAM ONLINE PERIOD (Daniel Pipes - don't even go there!). You'll stumble across all kinds of BS - music is banned, art is banned, smiling is banned, breathing is banned. This isn't Egyptians at all - not that I've seen. These people have probably the best sense of humour of any nationality I've ever come across. My fairly religious, T total Egyptian boyfriend (ooh I said the 'b' word) is now an ardent follower of Father Ted. Close second is Borat. Don't believe everything (or anything) you read online. They're adaptable, amenable, so kind - meh - you know all this for yourself, I'm sure, but there's a hell of a lot more to them than the brick wall you'd be led to believe. They're a lot more maleable than you might think
Talk about it. Read books - ah I started a Penguin one but then I got annoyed where the Sunnis and Shi'ites started falling out (why do all religions do this? My version is better - no it isn't - mine is? Can't be doing with it)... So I just started talking to him about it instead - let him tell you what it means to him. It doesn't have to be for you but you have to be able to live with it, at least.
Decide what you're going to compromise on (i.e. upbringing of any kids - someone's realistically going to have to give a bit - might seem a long way off but hypothetical discussions don't hurt). Decide what you're not going to compromise on (you know really - you shouldn't give up who you are. If you're marrying an Egyptian Muslim you're going to have to be understanding of his culture so if he's decided to marry a western Christian or aetheist or what have you - same thing follows).
Dalia gave me very good advice when I first arrived here with my little head spinning all over the place. Just stay true to yourself above all else then the rest of it should follow. Que sera sera and all of that. But ES is great for getting the background on Egypt. Don't be in a huge rush to get to the end - life's all about the journey
Excellent post, agree with everything you said.
Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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And actually, he already owns two buffalo so no need to buy him any of those
Red flag!!
Just kidding
quote:I'm glad you all had a good chat while I was away, has anyone tried the Avon SSS soft and fresh dry oil spray?? I've tried it and it worked for me, and I know others who swear by it too. Doesn't smell too bad either
Heard this a lot, Avon Skin So Soft body cream etc keeps mozzies off.
Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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posted
When I was in Egypt in jan, my flat was freezing so I was going to bed fully dressed, so the mosquitoes went for my eyes and lips instead. Looked like I had had a beating!
Oh and monkey, I think I'd prefer to be with a man insisting I wear a burka, than make me watch father ted!
-------------------- Another one.... Posts: 2573 | From: England | Registered: Jun 2008
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Hi Sponge. I converted 2 years before meeting my hubby. I converted bcos I had been researching islam since my first trip to egypt back in 2006, something about it just spoke to my heart though at that time i did not even know how to say thank you in Arabic ! God only knows how i had such a reaction to islam since i never understood a word at that time.....since then i got more info from a local mosque, TRANSLATIONS ETC luckly i live in london so there are loads I believe this is the best way to find out more about islam if your english and have a mosque with sister or new muslim circles. I did not cover my hair at first, but i knew i would eventually. Coming from a british background i did find it hard only bcos my family are very closed with their view on all things different and they do get swepted up with all the bullsh!te that they hear from the media. I still have issues with my mother over this even though i've been muslim over 3 years now and went slowly with the transition (on my part). I truly believe anyone who ever thinks to convert to a different religion should do it bcos they believe in it not bcos of pressure by husband or inlaws etc or even just to ease/please them. There is no need to convert religion (unless u want to 4 yrslef) as it is allowed in the Qur'an for a male muslim to marry and have children with a woman of any religion or non religion as they believe any future children will take the religion of the father anyway.....in the future. I count myself very lucky i have been accepted with more than open arms and i am dearly loved by my hubby's family and i can honestly say i love them back just as much. They are not overly religious which is perfect as im not that strict either. Just have indepth talks with yr hubby to be about what he and his family expect of you in the future and see if u can accept it or not. Sometimes its not as bad as u imagine but its always best to get the right info from the horses mouth. I've learnt that lesson in more than one way, but believe me its more relevant within marriage. So many people have their views (esp bad views online) which are rightly thru the people they know or have met, but everyone is different and u must find the truth within your relationship not from how others are or have been. x P.S i would have been very worried if i was marrying into a strictly religious family, even being muslim before i met, im sure they would have expectations of me that i couldn't fullfil. But thats why u need to find out from him what is expected x x
Posts: 634 | From: the Moon........... | Registered: Mar 2007
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Dalia gave me very good advice when I first arrived here with my little head spinning all over the place.
Oh, really, I did?
quote:Originally posted by murray-mint77: it is allowed in the Qur'an for a male muslim to marry and have children with a woman of any religion or non religion
That's not quite correct. The Qur'an allows Muslims to marry people of the book, but says it's not okay to marry people who actively reject faith, so strictly speaking that would exclude atheists. Also, in contrary to the mainstream interpretation, the Qur'an itself does not prohibit Muslim women to marry men of other faiths. Scholars who say that this is forbidden usually don't refer to any scriptural sources but mainly base their reasoning on personal opinions about marriage and relationships.
Posts: 3587 | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
^^Yes that is the official wording as such..^^ (people of the book) but I feel to b honest it is far more accepted to marry one with no religion (to as far as atheist) than an idolator, (which does include the catholic religion) which is as far as im aware a religion of the book...thats why i don't like to state that term ''people of the book'' But that is just my personal opinion/view on things x
Posts: 634 | From: the Moon........... | Registered: Mar 2007
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quote:Originally posted by Dalia*: Originally posted by Monkey:
Dalia gave me very good advice when I first arrived here with my little head spinning all over the place. Oh, really, I did?
Something about it getting on your wick when egyptian men meet western women and the western woman assumes that she has to change everything about herself to conform, or is expected to change this that and t'other, because if they don't like you for who you are why doesn't the egyptian man marry an egyptian woman and cut out the faff. Something like that... I think. I remember getting a bug up my arse because I was in the gooey stupid phase and you were quite direct, but never a truer word was spoken - so thanks Posts: 1678 | From: New Egypt Forum - http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Dec 2009
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quote:Originally posted by murray-mint77: Hi Sponge. I converted 2 years before meeting my hubby. I converted bcos I had been researching islam since my first trip to egypt back in 2006, something about it just spoke to my heart though at that time i did not even know how to say thank you in Arabic ! God only knows how i had such a reaction to islam since i never understood a word at that time.....since then i got more info from a local mosque, TRANSLATIONS ETC luckly i live in london so there are loads I believe this is the best way to find out more about islam if your english and have a mosque with sister or new muslim circles. I did not cover my hair at first, but i knew i would eventually. Coming from a british background i did find it hard only bcos my family are very closed with their view on all things different and they do get swepted up with all the bullsh!te that they hear from the media. I still have issues with my mother over this even though i've been muslim over 3 years now and went slowly with the transition (on my part). I truly believe anyone who ever thinks to convert to a different religion should do it bcos they believe in it not bcos of pressure by husband or inlaws etc or even just to ease/please them. There is no need to convert religion (unless u want to 4 yrslef) as it is allowed in the Qur'an for a male muslim to marry and have children with a woman of any religion or non religion as they believe any future children will take the religion of the father anyway.....in the future. I count myself very lucky i have been accepted with more than open arms and i am dearly loved by my hubby's family and i can honestly say i love them back just as much. They are not overly religious which is perfect as im not that strict either. Just have indepth talks with yr hubby to be about what he and his family expect of you in the future and see if u can accept it or not. Sometimes its not as bad as u imagine but its always best to get the right info from the horses mouth. I've learnt that lesson in more than one way, but believe me its more relevant within marriage. So many people have their views (esp bad views online) which are rightly thru the people they know or have met, but everyone is different and u must find the truth within your relationship not from how others are or have been. x P.S i would have been very worried if i was marrying into a strictly religious family, even being muslim before i met, im sure they would have expectations of me that i couldn't fullfil. But thats why u need to find out from him what is expected x x
Mashallah murray-mint77 i'm so happy for you.
This was something I enjoyed reading.
May allah guide you and bless you always Posts: 1048 | From: If you are given a blessing you may be envied | Registered: Oct 2008
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posted
Evening all, I want so much to quote loads of your replies but it'll take up too much room so all I'll say is:
Monkey, thanks for the huge input very interesting and good advice about learning about things.
Dalia, I'll second that on the advice you gave Monkey, really gives you a wake up call and makes so much sense. Oh, and I'm glad you helped her get that bug out of her ass, she sounds very happy for it
Murray-mint thanks for your insight into someone who converted, I'd like to know more at some point. Don't think I have too many mosques near me?!
and Ayisha, red flag with the buffalos then?! Do you think I should hold out till he gets a third?! Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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posted
Thank you Marydot im pleased u enjoyed it x I know i am one of the very very lucky ones and i hope my cut down version of my life so far helps some see there is a little light at the end of the tunnel (for some) not all turn into the road to hell though alot do sadly i think alot of those have to do with miscommunication and wishful thinking on both parts Posts: 634 | From: the Moon........... | Registered: Mar 2007
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quote:Originally posted by murray-mint77: I think alot of those have to do with miscommunication and wishful thinking on both parts
Do you know, the one thing that runs all the way through anyone's advice is all about the communication. Sounds so simple doesn't it but it's not that easy for a lot of people. Thankfully I've never had a problem talking about my feelings But if you don't just live round the corner, the phone isn't always the easiest place to discuss your life decisions
And when you both have worries so far apart (he is out of work at the moment and worries that his boss won't give him the time off he wants when I'm due to see him later this year, my worries are too long to even write on here!) it's hard to always keep things light. But we always manage to end our calls with a laugh so that keeps us sane Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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and Ayisha, red flag with the buffalos then?! Do you think I should hold out till he gets a third?!
Nooo! I would interrogate him as to who bought those 2, was it 1 woman bought the 2 or was it 2 women bought 1 each. If he gets a 3rd one he's definitely cheating on you with some rich bint.
I am of course pulling your leg Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: [QUOTE]Nooo! I would interrogate him as to who bought those 2, was it 1 woman bought the 2 or was it 2 women bought 1 each. If he gets a 3rd one he's definitely cheating on you with some rich bint.
I am of course pulling your leg
Hilarious!! Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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Consider others advice but don't base your decision on it.
Consider the religious difference but don't base your actions on it. Your understanding of his religion can be very different than his understanding and practice of it.
Don't let fear be your motivation.
If he is amazing then he is a rare find, don't take it lightly.
Examine yourself, your heart, your feelings....
Use your head BUT FOLLOW YOUR HEART! Your head lies, only your heart knows the truth. Trust Yourself. Posts: 770 | From: www.cafepress.com/tahrir_square | Registered: Jul 2010
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quote:Originally posted by D_Oro: My opinion is to examine yourself.
Consider others advice but don't base your decision on it.
Consider the religious difference but don't base your actions on it. Your understanding of his religion can be very different than his understanding and practice of it.
Don't let fear be your motivation.
If he is amazing then he is a rare find, don't take it lightly.
Examine yourself, your heart, your feelings....
Use your head BUT FOLLOW YOUR HEART! Your head lies, only your heart knows the truth. Trust Yourself.
posted
I look at it this way; right now divorce rates are at about 50%. This is for couples who have lived together for years, and then got married, couples who have dated for long periods and then married, couples who thought they knew each other inside and out, and then married, couples who were childhood sweethearts, went to college and then married, couples who thought they would be together forever.
There is NO guarantee a marriage will last forever.
If you are comfortable with him, love him, and trust him, then in my opinion, go for it.
My best wishes for the both of you Posts: 3291 | From: I DO believe in Karma! | Registered: Apr 2002
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quote:Originally posted by D_Oro: My opinion is to examine yourself.
Consider others advice but don't base your decision on it.
Consider the religious difference but don't base your actions on it. Your understanding of his religion can be very different than his understanding and practice of it.
Don't let fear be your motivation.
If he is amazing then he is a rare find, don't take it lightly.
Examine yourself, your heart, your feelings....
Use your head BUT FOLLOW YOUR HEART! Your head lies, only your heart knows the truth. Trust Yourself.
Thanks to you... very wise words Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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quote:Originally posted by Laura: I look at it this way; right now divorce rates are at about 50%. This is for couples who have lived together for years, and then got married, couples who have dated for long periods and then married, couples who thought they knew each other inside and out, and then married, couples who were childhood sweethearts, went to college and then married, couples who thought they would be together forever.
Not a truer word spoken!!
quote:There is NO guarantee a marriage will last forever.
And again very true
quote:If you are comfortable with him, love him, and trust him, then in my opinion, go for it.
My best wishes for the both of you
Thanks Laura, everyone's posts are so helpful, it certainly gives me plenty of food for thought Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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quote:Originally posted by D_Oro: My opinion is to examine yourself.
Consider others advice but don't base your decision on it.
Consider the religious difference but don't base your actions on it. Your understanding of his religion can be very different than his understanding and practice of it.
Don't let fear be your motivation.
If he is amazing then he is a rare find, don't take it lightly.
Examine yourself, your heart, your feelings....
Use your head BUT FOLLOW YOUR HEART! Your head lies, only your heart knows the truth. Trust Yourself.
Thanks to you... very wise words
I have learned this the hard way... If your going to make a mistake, its better to error following your heart(IMHO), life it too short. Good luck to you. Posts: 770 | From: www.cafepress.com/tahrir_square | Registered: Jul 2010
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quote:Originally posted by D_Oro: I have learned this the hard way... If your going to make a mistake, its better to error following your heart(IMHO), life it too short. Good luck to you.
Not sure I understand this? Does this mean you think your head can sometimes talk you out of a good thing? Sorry if I seem a bit slow on the uptake Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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quote:Originally posted by D_Oro: I have learned this the hard way... If your going to make a mistake, its better to error following your heart(IMHO), life it too short. Good luck to you.
Not sure I understand this? Does this mean you think your head can sometimes talk you out of a good thing? Sorry if I seem a bit slow on the uptake
posted
The WORST thing is to end up regretting what you DIDN'T do, not what you DID do.
-------------------- If you don't learn from your mistakes, there's no sense making them. Posts: 15090 | From: http://www.egyptalk.com/forum/ | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: The WORST thing is to end up regretting what you DIDN'T do, not what you DID do.
Yes you are right and I feel like now it's time to start living my life. But I need to make sure I'm not jumping out of frying pan into the fire. I had quite a lot of problems with my ex and don't want to make those same mistakes again. This time I will think of myself, not making someone else happy Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: The WORST thing is to end up regretting what you DIDN'T do, not what you DID do.
Yes you are right and I feel like now it's time to start living my life. But I need to make sure I'm not jumping out of frying pan into the fire. I had quite a lot of problems with my ex and don't want to make those same mistakes again. This time I will think of myself, not making someone else happy
True.
It must be very hard when your partner is living in another country, i don't think i could cope with that distance thing.
Thank god I met my partner here in the uk.
Its early days yet
He lives in london too only 20 minites away from each other
so all is fantastic here Posts: 1048 | From: If you are given a blessing you may be envied | Registered: Oct 2008
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quote:Originally posted by marydot: [QUOTE]Its early days yet
He lives in london too only 20 minites away from each other
so all is fantastic here
I'm pleased for you Marydot
I'm starting to think as much as me and my partner love each other, the cultural differences may be too much
I hope when I visit him in September we can talk more about everything face to face as it's so hard over the phone. I hope we can work through things but if not then we have had happy time so far. It'll be very sad if it doesn't happen but I still want to give it the chance it deserves.
Only time will tell Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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posted
At least you will be making an informed decision
-------------------- Jane Akshar UK Co-owner of www.flatsinluxor.co.uk Appartments and Tours in Luxor Posts: 2791 | From: www.flatsinluxor.co.uk, Luxor, Egypt | Registered: Jan 2003
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quote:Originally posted by akshar: At least you will be making an informed decision
Yes I know you're right. Gonna hurt bad though if we realise it won't work But we'll live and better now than 10yrs down the line after making each other miserable.
Just hard to think of it when your feelings are strong for each other and its your culture that gets in the way. You never know, I might be wrong. I always have been a pessimist!! Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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posted
My husband and i have been through some tough things, but i dont regret any of it. Its been worth all of it
Posts: 313 | From: maadi cairo | Registered: Dec 2007
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quote:Originally posted by adelly: My husband and i have been through some tough things, but i dont regret any of it. Its been worth all of it
Yes, I don't want to give up on us just yet. Maybe I'm just feeling down cos I'm missing him and it's another 21wks till I can see him again. Plus my work is so busy here so I'm always tired.
Thanks to all for your kind words xx
Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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posted
Hang in there and time will pass. Keep busy and keep in touch with ur beloved.
Posts: 313 | From: maadi cairo | Registered: Dec 2007
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quote:Originally posted by adelly: Hang in there and time will pass. Keep busy and keep in touch with ur beloved.
Thanks adelly. I think I have a tendancy to want to sort everything out on day one and to have so many difficult conversations (religion/family/children) one after the other, and on the phone where sometimes you can't always feel well, we're probably not doing it at the best time.
We still love each other even tho we've hit some tough disagreements so if we can keep communicating through those and then sit and speak face to face when we're together it'll be so much better. Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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quote:Originally posted by marydot: [QUOTE]Its early days yet
He lives in london too only 20 minites away from each other
so all is fantastic here
I'm pleased for you Marydot
I'm starting to think as much as me and my partner love each other, the cultural differences may be too much
I hope when I visit him in September we can talk more about everything face to face as it's so hard over the phone. I hope we can work through things but if not then we have had happy time so far. It'll be very sad if it doesn't happen but I still want to give it the chance it deserves.
Only time will tell
quote: the cultural differences may be too much
Why ?
Put aside the cultural differences for now, and learn more about each other,anyone can over come the cultural differences by learning and accepting new things that are different to your culture.
Stop worrying and it will be fine.
I cant say what will happen, because i just dont know, but take it easy, worrying about it will make it worse. Posts: 1048 | From: If you are given a blessing you may be envied | Registered: Oct 2008
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quote:Originally posted by marydot: [QUOTE]Put aside the cultural differences for now, and learn more about each other,anyone can over come the cultural differences by learning and accepting new things that are different to your culture.
Thank you. I just always want everyone to be happy and I worry that he feels his family won't be happy if he marries a christian (and a not very religious one at that!) but deep down I think that once they get to know me more and they know how I feel about their son then they would be happy for us.
He knows how I live in England and is prepared to come here when/if we marry so he can't be too set in his ways?? I think you're right marydot, we have to concentrate on each other and how we are together, before we lay down the ground rules and start having discussions every minute on the serious stuff. It can drag you down sometimes.
Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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posted
There is no need to decide whether you want to marry him right this second. Get to know each other, and when you KNOW you want to live with him for the rest of your life, and KNOW you can live with him, that's when you go for it. Now just continue getting to know each other, there is no rush. Cultural differences are important, it isn't just a case of a tea drinker with a coffee drinker. Our culture helps define who we are and has a major influence over pretty much every aspect of our life. So it's all very romantic talking about following the heart etc etc, but the honeymoon period doesn't last forever and so you have to be practical too. So take it extremely slowly, and just see where it goes.
-------------------- Another one.... Posts: 2573 | From: England | Registered: Jun 2008
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quote:Originally posted by weirdkitty: Now just continue getting to know each other, there is no rush. Cultural differences are important, it isn't just a case of a tea drinker with a coffee drinker. Our culture helps define who we are and has a major influence over pretty much every aspect of our life.
Yes wk, you're right. I imagine this happens a lot. Because you are so far apart and don't see each other often enough, the whole marriage thing seems the only way at first. But taking a step back is always a good idea and as much as I am a romantic, I'm also very logical so I hope I can meet the two in the middle Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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quote:Originally posted by marydot: 30 txt messages from my partner today since 8am this morning until now lol and he's only in the next town!!!
Wish the txts between UK and Egypt were as cheap as town to town!!
And you know the minute you threw the phone down the loo you'd be fishing it out to check for another msg Posts: 171 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2011
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UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!
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I'm a great believer in trusting your gut and giving life a shake and getting everything you can out of it in the short time we're here 
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He gave his brother the money needed to finish his house last year and he is half way through building his own. ![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
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God only knows how i had such a reaction to islam since i never understood a word at that time.....since then i got more info from a local mosque, TRANSLATIONS ETC luckly i live in london so there are loads ![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
But if you don't just live round the corner, the phone isn't always the easiest place to discuss your life decisions 
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