I was just wondering how you would reccomend responding to rude remarks on the street in Cairo? I normally try to ignore it while fuming inside, but feel as though Im letting them get away with their insults? I got a jilbaab on ebay and will try to avoid it by wearing that, would that work?
I was just wondering how you would reccomend responding to rude remarks on the street in Cairo? I normally try to ignore it while fuming inside, but feel as though Im letting them get away with their insults? I got a jilbaab on ebay and will try to avoid it by wearing that, would that work?
insha'allah it would work gigli. but if you still face the rude remarks , just ignore. unless if you were in a crowded place with people , you will have a good chance to spit on his face and do your best to make it look ugly enough - and you still can get away with it
[This message has been edited by Humanized (edited 11 October 2005).]
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and tel;l us how do you avoid getting raped in your own country? by the way what country is it ? and what is the percentage of raping there ?.. is that your turn to insult egyptians by asking stupied questions like this? ofcoursae you are asking to get help and you are not trying to hint that egyptian men are sude and give you bad remarks,, who will blame them a forigner women is in Egypt so it is a big deal...LOL
Posts: 1373 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Humanized: insha'allah it would work gigli. but if you still face the rude remarks , just ignore. unless if you were in a crowded place with people , you will have a good chance to spit on his face and do your best to make it look ugly enough - and you still can get away with it
he he he he I like the way you think It took me forever to find the jilbaab not in black! I hope it will work, its so embarrasing
[This message has been edited by Humanized (edited 11 October 2005).]
quote:Originally posted by mohsen1000: and tel;l us how do you avoid getting raped in your own country? by the way what country is it ? and what is the percentage of raping there ?.. is that your turn to insult egyptians by asking stupied questions like this? ofcoursae you are asking to get help and you are not trying to hint that egyptian men are sude and give you bad remarks,, who will blame them a forigner women is in Egypt so it is a big deal...LOL
I know my country has a problem with rape and especially rape on children. What do want? Are you saying there is no such things as sexual harrassment on the streets of Cairo?
quote:Originally posted by mohsen1000: and tel;l us how do you avoid getting raped in your own country? by the way what country is it ? and what is the percentage of raping there ?.. is that your turn to insult egyptians by asking stupied questions like this? ofcoursae you are asking to get help and you are not trying to hint that egyptian men are sude and give you bad remarks,, who will blame them a forigner women is in Egypt so it is a big deal...LOL
Ramadan Kareem guys
[This message has been edited by doudd (edited 11 October 2005).]
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well I did not say it does not exist in Cairo , what I meant to say that: you can use same attitude you used to use in your own country to defend yousself aganiost more dnager and therats .. I think this should not be hard to do .. if you try to think.. or are you only trying to say egyptians have bad behviour
Posts: 1373 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2004
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quote:Originally posted by mohsen1000: well I did not say it does not exist in Cairo , what I meant to say that: you can use same attitude you used to use in your own country to defend yousself aganiost more dnager and therats .. I think this should not be hard to do .. if you try to think.. or are you only trying to say egyptians have bad behviour
Even in my own country I dont wear provocative clothing. But on the streets of Cairo men do say appaling things even when Im walking with my fiance, which as would know does not happen for instance in London. I want to avoid this and simply asked for advise as to how to deal with it why it happens and blah blah bal without thinking as to why . If you dont want to answer my question no worries, go to the brainless me thread and bash away.
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no it won't work giggli. ive tried wearing everything and they still harrass me. i have many friends who are veiled and it still doesn't work. i know an american woman who tried covering and still she was getting bloody comments. i've tried everything from being quiet to shouting to even hitting them with my bag! its one of the things that drive me crazy about egypt. it really really really makes me angry!!!! at the moment one australian lady and two american ones are trying to make an awarenss campaign about sexual harrasment. they are trying to get funding from newyork. we've already had one discussion group, and inshallah will have more. so maybe you can join and help us turn this around. if you want more information email me at yasminefathy@hotmail.com
Posts: 4446 | From: Egyptian in Sydney | Registered: Mar 2005
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quote:Originally posted by gigli: Even in my own country I dont wear provocative clothing. But on the streets of Cairo men do say appaling things even when Im walking with my fiance, which as would know does not happen for instance in London. I want to avoid this and simply asked for advise as to how to deal with it why it happens and blah blah bal without thinking as to why . If you dont want to answer my question no worries, go to the brainless me thread and bash away.
Gigli, your question is quite understandable. I have experienced men at their 'best street demeanor' on three continents and definitely advice you to: IGNORE. Smile politely if you can't. Ask 'how may I help you'? in a most refine and elegant way: that usually catches them off guard. If you don't feel strong enough for the 'street talk', walk off and smile at all the attention you are getting. They should not be as obnoxious when you are with a man at your side. So far in my book the cake goes to Latinos for the most 'graphic' and bold comments about the women passing them by. Completely YUCK!
Posts: 2238 | From: Mother Earth | Registered: Jun 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Karah_Mia: [QUOTE]Originally posted by gigli: [b] Even in my own country I dont wear provocative clothing. But on the streets of Cairo men do say appaling things even when Im walking with my fiance, which as would know does not happen for instance in London. I want to avoid this and simply asked for advise as to how to deal with it why it happens and blah blah bal without thinking as to why . If you dont want to answer my question no worries, go to the brainless me thread and bash away.
Gigli, your question is quite understandable. I have experienced men at their 'best street demeanor' on three continents and definitely advice you to: IGNORE. Smile politely if you can't. Ask 'how may I help you'? in a most refine and elegant way: that usually catches them off guard. If you don't feel strong enough for the 'street talk', walk off and smile at all the attention you are getting. They should not be as obnoxious when you are with a man at your side. So far in my book the cake goes to Latinos for the most 'graphic' and bold comments about the women passing them by. Completely YUCK![/B][/QUOTE]
LOL definitely! I was just wondering 'omg what will things be like for me in Egypt? Once you mention Latinos I thought 'oh if I can handle them, I can handle anyone!'. Sometimes the things they say, I wonder which sub human amobe raised this person??
[This message has been edited by nooralhaq (edited 11 October 2005).]
Posts: 1706 | From: Dallas, Texas, USA | Registered: Nov 2004
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quote:Originally posted by mohsen1000: and tel;l us how do you avoid getting raped in your own country?
Rape and lewd remarks are two entirely different things.
Rape is a crime of violence that is not socially acceptable. Cat calls are a form of humiliation that seem to be socially acceptable (at least among men) in certain places. And as long as it's socially acceptable, women will have to find a way to avoid or at least minimize exposure to it.
Posts: 8794 | From: 01-20-09 The End of an Error | Registered: Dec 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Snoozin: Rape and lewd remarks are two entirely different things.
Rape is a [b]crime of violence that is not socially acceptable. Cat calls are a form of humiliation that seem to be socially acceptable (at least among men) in certain places. And as long as it's socially acceptable, women will have to find a way to avoid or at least minimize exposure to it.
[/B]
here where I am from when I hear the cat calls I just completely ignore it, it is much easier...however; I will admit now that I cover not only do I not hear anything but people will actually step aside and STARE at the white american freak who's all covered up.....oh well, can't have everything I guess....did you know I actually had one man in a grocery store once look at me (covered) and asked me, 'why do you wear this? Who is your God?' LOL
Posts: 1706 | From: Dallas, Texas, USA | Registered: Nov 2004
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karah, snoozin, and noor, believe me the sexual harrasment in egypt is a disaster. it will really get on your nerves even if you are the calmest person on earth! i bet the egyptians are even worse than the latios! although serendipity says the worst harrasment she got was in syria. definitly not going there!!
Posts: 4446 | From: Egyptian in Sydney | Registered: Mar 2005
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quote:Originally posted by nooralhaq: here where I am from when I hear the cat calls I just completely ignore it, it is much easier...however; I will admit now that I cover not only do I not hear anything but people will actually step aside and STARE at the white american freak who's all covered up.....oh well, can't have everything I guess....did you know I actually had one man in a grocery store once look at me (covered) and asked me, 'why do you wear this? Who is your God?' LOL
LOL! Actually, I'm glad they leave you alone. We've had some recent incidents of harrassment here against women who were covered, precisely because they were.
Posts: 8794 | From: 01-20-09 The End of an Error | Registered: Dec 2004
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quote:Originally posted by mohsen1000: what I meant to say that: you can use same attitude you used to use in your own country to defend yousself aganiost more dnager and therats ..
No, mohsen, you can't. The "danger" you might face in a big Western city is something completely different then the kind of harrassment you face here.
If you're a Western woman coming to Cairo you have no conduct of behaviour to deal with the harrassment on the streets because it doesn't exist in your homecountry.
When I first came to live in Egypt the harrassment would drive me insane and I felt very helpless because I couldn't come up with a "technique" to respond to it and I was asking similar questions - "How do you react? What's the best way to deal with it?" and so on. It has nothing to do with trying to make Egyptians look bad, so please don't be so defensive.
If you don't believe it's a problem go out with any foreign woman and follow her with a few steps distance while she takes a walk through Cairo and you will soon know what everyone is talking about ...
[This message has been edited by Dalia (edited 11 October 2005).]
quote:Originally posted by Dalia: No, mohsen, unfortunately it won't work.
If you're a Western woman coming to Cairo you have no conduct of behaviour to deal with the harrassment on the streets because it doesn't exist in your homecountry.
When I first came to live in Egypt the harrassment would drive me insane and I felt very helpless because I couldn't come up with a "technique" to respond to it and I was asking similar question - "How do you react? What's the best way to deal with it?" and so on. It has nothing to do with trying to make Egyptians look bad, so please don't be so defensive.
If you don't believe it's a problem go out with any foreign woman and follow her with a few steps distance while she takes a walk through Cairo and you will soon know what everyone is talking about ...
Thank you. You said what I was *trying* to say, only much better. Yeah, there are some lewd remarks made here or there in America. But nothing like I saw in Cairo. We're just not used to it.
Posts: 8794 | From: 01-20-09 The End of an Error | Registered: Dec 2004
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People usually get what they deserve. You may call it destiny or fate but there is always a meaning to everything that happens to you. Try and find out. God sends you messages, will you ignore them?
the prophet once told one of his wives: "there is nothing i can do to help you to please god"
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For me I don't care,I mean as a western girl yes when Iam in Cairo men try to talk to me,but most of the time I don't understand what they say, and when they talk to me in English: Sorry no comprendo!!!! I can tell you after 5 mins trying to talk to me in all languages they know, they give up quilkly!!!! ( this is for the ones who insist), otherwise, I often listen some music,and really don't know what happen into the outside world!!!
I usually have my music on, and don't notice or listen to that
quote:Originally posted by Snoozin: LOL! Actually, I'm glad they leave you alone. We've had some recent incidents of harrassment here against women who were covered, precisely because they were.
lovely...I just wish I could go to Sam's one day without people staring at me from behind racks of food. Many people are very nice though and will go out of their way to make eye contact, say hello, etc., I find TOO many African Americans try to say 'Salaam Alaykom' to me....which really throws me off. Although I did have a group of men standing around once staring at me and laughing Which was not worse than the Mexican man in the grocery store who came up to me, put his face about 2 inches from mine and made KISSING noises while staring right at me.
Posts: 1706 | From: Dallas, Texas, USA | Registered: Nov 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Columbo: People usually get what they deserve. You may call it destiny or fate but there is always a meaning to everything that happens to you. Try and find out. God sends you messages, will you ignore them?
So are you saying God is telling me Cairo is not a place to live in as a woman?
quote:Originally posted by 7aya: no it won't work giggli. ive tried wearing everything and they still harrass me. i have many friends who are veiled and it still doesn't work. i know an american woman who tried covering and still she was getting bloody comments. i've tried everything from being quiet to shouting to even hitting them with my bag! its one of the things that drive me crazy about egypt. it really really really makes me angry!!!! at the moment one australian lady and two american ones are trying to make an awarenss campaign about sexual harrasment. they are trying to get funding from newyork. we've already had one discussion group, and inshallah will have more. so maybe you can join and help us turn this around. if you want more information email me at yasminefathy@hotmail.com
Excellent you hit them with your bag?! ha ha ha ha I wish I could have seen that! I think that your awareness campaign is an excellent idea to stop men bahaving in this derogatory way towards women. I will mail you. It all starts with youth. I feel so disrespected and dirty when they say vile things! You are right it is sexual harassment. How does the law work in regards to this issue?
quote:Originally posted by gigli: Excellent you hit them with your bag?! ha ha ha ha I wish I could have seen that! I think that your awareness campaign is an excellent idea to stop men bahaving in this derogatory way towards women. I will mail you. It all starts with youth. I feel so disrespected and dirty when they say vile things! You are right it is sexual harassment. How does the law work in regards to this issue?
by the way, what kinds of things are they saying??
Posts: 1706 | From: Dallas, Texas, USA | Registered: Nov 2004
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quote:Originally posted by 7aya: karah, snoozin, and noor, believe me the sexual harrasment in egypt is a disaster. it will really get on your nerves even if you are the calmest person on earth! i bet the egyptians are even worse than the latios!
I'd prefer the harassment in Spanish - just sounds better.
Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by gigli: Im sorry but other than sharmootah etc, I cant bring myself to say those words in public. But if someone said that to your mum, youd kill them
well forgive me, what is sharmootah? can anyone give me some examples of what I might hear when I get there? I like to be prepared for anything....it can't be THAT bad could it?? Is it bad names or sexual things or what?? By the way, how old are these guys, sounds like a bunch of kids that would do that.
Posts: 1706 | From: Dallas, Texas, USA | Registered: Nov 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Dalia: [QUOTE]Originally posted by nooralhaq: [b] well forgive me, what is sharmootah?
A whore.
quote:Originally posted by nooralhaq: By the way, how old are these guys, sounds like a bunch of kids that would do that.
Roughly spoken any age from about 8 to sixtysomething.
[This message has been edited by Dalia (edited 11 October 2005).][/B][/QUOTE]
omgggggggg! Are you serious???!!?? If my son ever speaks like this I probably kill him or have his father do it. (ok not seriously don't start attacking me for child abuse, figure of speech, figures of speech). What those men need is a good a** beating in front of everyone, make them think twice about making those comments.
Posts: 1706 | From: Dallas, Texas, USA | Registered: Nov 2004
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quote:Originally posted by nooralhaq: omgggggggg! Are you serious???!!?? If my son ever speaks like this I probably kill him or have his father do it. (ok not seriously don't start attacking me for child abuse, figure of speech, figures of speech). What those men need is a good a** beating in front of everyone, make them think twice about making those comments.
My habibi is a strapping strong tall man. They even say it in front of him. THe amount of times he almost beat someone is amazing. Even older men dressed in suits at posh establishments. then they argue back not even an apology
quote:Originally posted by nooralhaq: Lol....well they all sound pretty desperate if you ask me.
I think they think theyr quite the man. God alone knows how they came to that conclusion, but sometimes its so bad that it feels wrong to just ignore it
quote:Originally posted by gigli: I think they think theyr quite the man. God alone knows how they came to that conclusion, but sometimes its so bad that it feels wrong to just ignore it
I wonder what they would do if the girl walked up to them, and gave them a quick swift kick with the knee between the legs? Do you think that would be socially acceptable? I might try that one
Posts: 1706 | From: Dallas, Texas, USA | Registered: Nov 2004
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Noor, you will have much "kicking" to do then.
Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by nooralhaq: I wonder what they would do if the girl walked up to them, and gave them a quick swift kick with the knee between the legs? Do you think that would be socially acceptable? I might try that one
Id love to hit them but what would they do? maybe theyd hit back! I think its up to the government to control this as it should be illegal
quote:Originally posted by gigli: Id love to hit them but what would they do? maybe theyd hit back! I think its up to the government to control this as it should be illegal
I was wondering the same thing...what *would* they do?
Posts: 8794 | From: 01-20-09 The End of an Error | Registered: Dec 2004
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quote:Originally posted by gigli: Id love to hit them but what would they do? maybe theyd hit back! I think its up to the government to control this as it should be illegal
they won't hit you back, they will be too busy searching for their manhood up in their stomachs. I grew up with an older bully brother, trust me, when you kick them there, they immediately fall to their knees with their heads down holding themselves, when this happens, immediately raise your knee stright up hitting them in the forehead, if you're lucky in the nose, they will go back and be out for the count
Posts: 1706 | From: Dallas, Texas, USA | Registered: Nov 2004
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quote:Originally posted by nooralhaq: they won't hit you back, they will be too busy searching for their manhood up in their stomachs. I grew up with an older bully brother, trust me, when you kick them there, they immediately fall to their knees with their heads down holding themselves, when this happens, immediately raise your knee stright up hitting them in the forehead, if you're lucky in the nose, they will go back and be out for the count
Hee hee. When I worked in the jail, that's *exactly* how they taught us to *defend* ourselves. Kick (although preferably knee) to the crotch and then when they are down, kick them hard in the face. Really oogs me out to think about it, but it was better than the other option they gave me, gouging their eyes out with a pen. Yuck!
although I'm sure I would do whatever I had to at that point....
Posts: 8794 | From: 01-20-09 The End of an Error | Registered: Dec 2004
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quote:Originally posted by nooralhaq: they won't hit you back, they will be too busy searching for their manhood up in their stomachs. I grew up with an older bully brother, trust me, when you kick them there, they immediately fall to their knees with their heads down holding themselves, when this happens, immediately raise your knee stright up hitting them in the forehead, if you're lucky in the nose, they will go back and be out for the count
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You only have to do it once, they get the lesson quite quickly. However I was also pretty passive agressive, in the real heat of anger, I would take the brothers toothbrush and clean the toilet with it....I would nicely replace it back where it belongs and smile the next time I saw him brushing his teeth Posts: 1706 | From: Dallas, Texas, USA | Registered: Nov 2004
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quote:Originally posted by gigli: My habibi is a strapping strong tall man. They even say it in front of him. THe amount of times he almost beat someone is amazing. Even older men dressed in suits at posh establishments. then they argue back not even an apology
Thats weird. My FIL is is 6'2" and in his late 50s. When I go about town in Shebin or in Cairo I have him by my side.
If any guy starts to open his mouth to say something rude a person next to the young bastard smack him or start screaming at him to be polite.
Most of these young Amms don't have a chance to make a remark.
Yet I think most people know what position my FIL holds and how many Hajjs he has made. You don't insult a DIL of a man like that.
But if I am out after dark with my SIL then the comments come. But I have never been called a sharmoota by a guy, just women, along with the snear "Nancy Ajram".
Posts: 5744 | From: Minneapolis, Mn USA | Registered: Mar 2004
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by sonomod: [b] Thats weird. My FIL is is 6'2" and in his late 50s. When I go about town in Shebin or in Cairo I have him by my side.
If any guy starts to open his mouth to say something rude a person next to the young bastard smack him or start screaming at him to be polite. ] Quote. Sonomods post ends
Mine starts You see habibi could pass for italian etc. so maybe they think he doesnt understand what they say? I myself am 6 foot, but it doesnt seem to intimidate these guys. Just the way they look makes me feel like having a bath.I really think the only way to stop this would be to try and find out what makes them do this. Is it low self esteem?
[This message has been edited by gigli (edited 11 October 2005).]
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dalia why don't you want to believe that egyptian women suffer from this too? and for egyptian girls its even worse because we actually understand the vile that is coming out of their mouth
noor you want to know what they say? are you ready? well it could be something as ya gameel (beautiful) ammar (pretty) mouzza (babe) ya abyad (white girl) sub7an ma abda3 (god has spent alot of time on you) they could also make fun of you, of something you are wearing, if you are wearing glasses they might raise their hands and ask you to count the fingers, if you are limping they might tell you, we hope you make it to the end of the road. it also can be very sexual, they might refer to your genitals and tell you what they want to do with it, oh babe i want to lick your **** or fondle your **** my penis is big you will like it, etc. it could also be playful like they will stop you and ask, where is micky mouse bridge??? well i hope you now have an idea of what us women face while walking in the streets in egypt. its not pretty is it??
Posts: 4446 | From: Egyptian in Sydney | Registered: Mar 2005
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quote:Originally posted by 7aya: dalia why don't you want to believe that egyptian women suffer from this too? and for egyptian girls its even worse because we actually understand the vile that is coming out of their mouth
noor you want to know what they say? are you ready? well it could be something as ya gameel (beautiful) ammar (pretty) mouzza (babe) ya abyad (white girl) sub7an ma abda3 (god has spent alot of time on you) they could also make fun of you, of something you are wearing, if you are wearing glasses they might raise their hands and ask you to count the fingers, if you are limping they might tell you, we hope you make it to the end of the road. it also can be very sexual, they might refer to your genitals and tell you what they want to do with it, oh babe i want to lick your **** or fondle your **** my penis is big you will like it, etc. it could also be playful like they will stop you and ask, where is micky mouse bridge??? well i hope you now have an idea of what us women face while walking in the streets in egypt. its not pretty is it??
Thank you 7aya, I've asked my fieance but he refused to tell me what kinds of things they say, I now see why. How cruel those mean things !!! BTW, that mickey mouse comment ... lame!
Posts: 183 | From: Dallas, Texas USA | Registered: May 2005
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quote:Originally posted by 7aya: dalia why don't you want to believe that egyptian women suffer from this too? and for egyptian girls its even worse because we actually understand the vile that is coming out of their mouth
Hmmm ... ?!? I might have said in another thread regarding this subject that foreigners suffer more from harrassment, but I don't remember saying I don't believe it happens to Egyptian women as well; I know it does.
And, btw, some foreigners understand very well what they are saying. I am sometimes surprised at how openly people (men as well as women) talk about you in your presence because they automatically assume you don't understand them ...
UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!
Many people are very nice though and will go out of their way to make eye contact, say hello, etc., I find TOO many African Americans try to say 'Salaam Alaykom' to me....which really throws me off. Although I did have a group of men standing around once staring at me and laughing 
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