quote:Originally posted by Shareen: Exactly my point!! At long last I have found a post of yours ANM that I can wholeheartedly agree with. LOL Great post!
quote:Originally posted by newcomer: What is it about the University of Chicago that attracts all these beautiful, hyper-confident, single, Eastern European/Asian women, who after facing the most devastating tragedies in their own countries, manage to get to America at the age of 19 to study in the best school, and who at the same time as studying, manage to support themselves and their families to amazingly high standards of living; who only mix with beautiful people in intellectual circles; despite being in their late 20’s and either celibate/never having lost their heart to any man they love to discuss/give advice on the subject of love/relationships supporting their arguments with the latest academic theories, dissing anyone who falls in love with a man younger than themselves/or has a “filthy”/disreputable relationship by their standards; and who become very attached to Egypt related boards despite the fact that they have never visited the country and just have a few Egyptian friends in the States? Just wondering!
Interesting observation Newcomer, I'm so bored right now, I think I'll go look through the archives of that other young beautiful lady attending law school from Sarajevo.
quote:Originally posted by AnotherNewMember: Interesting observation Newcomer, I'm so bored right now, I think I'll go look through the archives of that other young beautiful lady attending law school from Sarajevo.
WOW you MUST be really REALLY bored, LOL
------------------ I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it
quote:Originally posted by AnotherNewMember: Interesting observation Newcomer, I'm so bored right now, I think I'll go look through the archives of that other young beautiful lady attending law school from Sarajevo.
I am sooooooooooo bored too!!!! How about those handsome young lads attending any school as long as they are half my age. Oh wait, damn, that would be illegal. I can't win!!!!
Ps. Sharing opinions and learning from each other does not mean ALWAYS proving I AM RIGHT NOT YOU, ya people here. (Ragazzi please don't kill, it is just my humble opinion... )
quote:Originally posted by AnotherNewMember: Interesting observation Newcomer, I'm so bored right now, I think I'll go look through the archives of that other young beautiful lady attending law school from Sarajevo.
Ahhhhhhh you mean Boy George is back? Omg..... I am so dumb sometimes
quote:Originally posted by lotusflower: My Egyptian husband is 9 years younger than me and most people think that we are of the same age - I told him he is ageing faster than me!!
My situation is similar..i'm 27 and my egiptian husband 20.. Everybody gives me no more than 25 and him no less than 25.. so in eyes of others people we are same age.. I hope it'll not change in future
quote:Originally posted by AnotherNewMember: Dream catcher just hit POST REPLY one time and wait on the page to reload.
BLUSH BLUSH..................cooks...........LOL my intention was not 2 post same post a million times............lol..........no i did not have a blonde moment..however, my puter............froze........then i thought msg had not gone through.............oooi vey..........then i had 2 delete a million post.eventually got so fed up and left..........but be4 that i was sitting like a poop paul trying 2 delete them.............then the more i deleted.........................flip...the more there were....geee.............just to tell tiger i enjoyed her SOH. what a mission..............i am exhausted.......harooooooooooo. The joys of modern technology..............lol.....i dont think so
[This message has been edited by dreamcatcher (edited 23 August 2004).]
Posts: 286 | From: south africa | Registered: Apr 2004
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quote:Originally posted by dreamcatcher: BLUSH BLUSH..................cooks...........LOL my intention was not 2 post same post a million times............lol..........no i did not have a blonde moment..however, my puter............froze........then i thought msg had not gone through.............oooi vey..........then i had 2 delete a million post.eventually got so fed up and left..........but be4 that i was sitting like a poop paul trying 2 delete them.............then the more i deleted.........................flip...the more there were....geee.............just to tell tiger i enjoyed her SOH. what a mission..............i am exhausted.......harooooooooooo. The joys of modern technology..............lol.....i dont think so
[This message has been edited by dreamcatcher (edited 23 August 2004).]
Great now I know Im not crazy ....I had the same problem yesterday...my PC just kept on deleting everything...and eventually changed my mind and did not reply!
Posts: 723 | From: South Africa | Registered: Jun 2004
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posted
To stick my spoke in - I would say that all the women here in Luxor (including me and others who think themselves immune) that marry their toy boys really did float down the Nile on a water biscuit. It is just that they were so blinded by luuurve to see that the biscuit was not only sinking but was dissolving around them.
If they think of it as a business deal they will be OK. They buy flats, cars and businesses. They buy the illusion of love from a very good actor. There is nothing wrong with that. Just keep enough money back so that you do not have to go back to your own country penniless and bitter. If you like Egypt make sure you have sufficient resources to stay.
(Ten years is nothing - it's anywhere between 20 and 40 years that I am talking about).
AND yes you can sleep with whoever you like here in Luxor without the police bothering you just as long as it is in his home (condoned by his family) or in yours (that flat that you rented for the week). The police stop the boys in the street when they see them with older women because they KNOW that in a few years time the door of their Offices will open and the woman will walk in and say "Help me. I've lost everything. He took it all". When what they really mean is that they gave him everything they had and now he has found someone else with more money.
NB: Why is there so much paranoia over who is who, who was once someone else but is now someone different again but will be yetanothernewcomer next week?
Does it matter if they have something intelligent and different to say. I think it only matters when people rejoin in order to specifically hide who they are so that they can insult others. Especially when it is mentioned under yet another set of aliases. Phew! After all that I shall just have to register. (Calm down Hasselchump I don't want you to have to start another line ).
Kat - shall I call myself Ermintrude? For the non-Brits on the Forum - Ermintrude was a dozy, straw-munching cow on Magic Roundabout. A friend of Dillon (Bob not Thomas) Rabbit. Glory Days.
quote:Originally posted by baida: My situation is similar..i'm 27 and my egiptian husband 20.. Everybody gives me no more than 25 and him no less than 25.. so in eyes of others people we are same age.. I hope it'll not change in future
I think you can get away with that one because you can bear him children.
quote:Originally posted by Luxorlover: NB: Why is there so much paranoia over who is who, who was once someone else but is now someone different again but will be yetanothernewcomer next week?
Does it matter if they have something intelligent and different to say. I think it only matters when people rejoin in order to specifically hide who they are so that they can insult others. Especially when it is mentioned under yet another set of aliases. Phew! After all that I shall just have to register. (Calm down Hasselchump I don't want you to have to start another line ).
Kat - shall I call myself Ermintrude? For the non-Brits on the Forum - Ermintrude was a dozy, straw-munching cow on Magic Roundabout. A friend of Dillon (Bob not Thomas) Rabbit. Glory Days.
Assalamu alaykum Luxorlover!
I think if you check my message you will see that I was just commenting on an incredible set of similarities between a current member and an old member, and not accusing anyone of anything and there is certainly no paranoia on my part, or any need for it. It is just so strange to keep on seeing even more similarities between the two of them emerging as time goes on, that’s all!
And to me it doesn’t matter whether insults are given under an alias or not, in both cases it’s unnecessary.
quote:Originally posted by Luxorlover: To stick my spoke in - I would say that all the women here in Luxor (including me and others who think themselves immune) that marry their toy boys really did float down the Nile on a water biscuit. It is just that they were so blinded by luuurve to see that the biscuit was not only sinking but was dissolving around them.
If they think of it as a business deal they will be OK. They buy flats, cars and businesses. They buy the illusion of love from a very good actor. There is nothing wrong with that. Just keep enough money back so that you do not have to go back to your own country penniless and bitter. If you like Egypt make sure you have sufficient resources to stay.
LL I think you and Carol have got it exactly right. If you can go into it as being a business deal and have no illusions then I guess it has a chance. I do love the bit about flaoting down the Nile on a water buscuit.
Here in Sharm my husband always call it the Sharm supermarket. Come and choose your man, pay the going price and off you go and have a happy life. Well for a few years anyway.
If anyone has any other illusions where the age gap is 20 to 40 years + and at the same time a large wealth gap...then they are just fooling themselves and are storing up a lot of pain for the future.
posted
Penny and LL that is the sad truth. I guess you do have to question the sort of person that would actually go into a relationship knowing that it was a business deal. You can almost excuse the young lads as their motivation is the perception of a better life. What really saddens me is that some people rather than take on board and attempt to understand the advice given to them by a far more knowledgable source on this subject choose to ignore it through their own arrogance. I don't know everything about every subject but after reading the posts here on ES I do sometimes feel as though I have a degree in it If people would only think logically about their actions these situations would never arise. I mean how you can liken the Egyptian culture to the UK is beyond me it really is. People need to open their eyes. Do you ever see an Egyptian couple where the wife is old enough to be the husbands mother - NEVER!
Posts: 156 | Registered: Aug 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: WOW you MUST be really REALLY bored, LOL
Actually I was j/k in one sense, and stating the obvious in the other. I think ANYTIME one comes to a forum (including myself) they must be bored and find it an interesting alternative to real life.
And also to just be frank and say SARAJEVO, since people around here seem to be so afraid to say her name, as if it's going to make her reappear, or as if she ever left, or as if she is under another id, like so many other recycled ID's around here. Mine included.
quote:Originally posted by Carol_2004: Penny and LL that is the sad truth. I guess you do have to question the sort of person that would actually go into a relationship knowing that it was a business deal. You can almost excuse the young lads as their motivation is the perception of a better life. What really saddens me is that some people rather than take on board and attempt to understand the advice given to them by a far more knowledgable source on this subject choose to ignore it through their own arrogance. I don't know everything about every subject but after reading the posts here on ES I do sometimes feel as though I have a degree in it If people would only think logically about their actions these situations would never arise. I mean how you can liken the Egyptian culture to the UK is beyond me it really is. People need to open their eyes. Do you ever see an Egyptian couple where the wife is old enough to be the husbands mother - NEVER!
I am not really one for giving advice to people but the more I think about there is one possible solution to all this. That is to come and live in Egypt independantly of any man ...work or set up a business make a home but make it very clear you are doing it for yourself. Have a friendship by all means but keep it socially respectable and then just give it time. That way you loose nothing, if he truly loves you he will wait and if not you may have found the new life that you were looking for in any case.
posted
Carol please do not insult me further by making inuendos to other members aimed at me. You are so smug.I am not arrogant because I do not chose to take the your advice. But just so that you do not have any sleepless nights worrying about me. My friend is far to honourable to accept money from me.I would not demean him by offering it. He is like most Egyptians believes he should look after women.And he looks after his parents because he is the eldest son and that is his responsibility. He and his family have various shops (no doubt bought with money he has extracted from western sluts). He does not need my money Carol.If you had read one of my first postings, I said ,he has enough money of his own. So what are we down to now,Mmm sleeping with me.tut tut. My body, not bad for a fifty year old suppose I could pass for forty. So then we come to my personality.Yes that must be it,probably because I am just plain nice,I do not pass judgement on others when I do not know the facts and would certainly never offer advice unless I was asked for it. Well that must be it a 30 year old man loves a 50 year old woman, big deal,you will get over it,there are plenty left out there for you,I'll see what I can do.Now what sort of age would you like...12, 15, 21.
Posts: 343 | From: Wiltshire, England | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
Like I said before GeGe you know better than me. None of the comments in my last reply were specifically aimed at you don't flatter yourself. Would you prefer me to lie and say "oh no Ge Ge age in a relationship in the Egyptian culture doesn't matter". You obviously have concerns to have started this topic in the first place. I was merly replying with the knowledge I have gained from LIVING in Egypt. It was not advice aimed necessarily at you I was just passing on knowledge that I have. This knowledge is not actually my opinion. My opinion is that it should not matter as long as both parties are happy. My opinion is not what counts the FACTS are. If you don't want to hear the facts or opinions of others why post on a forum?
Posts: 156 | Registered: Aug 2004
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Please don't get upset by what comments come up here you did suspect what you were letting yourself in for when you started the topic. It's your life and only you can make your own decisions...just remember though most of what is written here is very well intentioned and based on real life experiences...you will see it for yourself when you come and live here. Even if we just open your eyes to what does go on then that can only be a good thing. Can I also just say sometimes these men seem like absolute saints to start with and the problems come much much later. Good luck be happy.
quote:Originally posted by Penny: Can I also just say sometimes these men seem like absolute saints to start with and the problems come much much later. Good luck be happy.
Penny
But Penny, can't you say this about most relationships that end up going bad? I hear my girlfriends here in the states whine all the time about these same issues - no matter if the man is older or younger. It's not just men. My male friends talk about the women they thought were sooooo wonderful until they realized they just liked them for their money, car, boat...etc. Relationships in general are hard and take a lot of work on both sides. GeGe, I say go for the gold, Girl, and don't look back. You and your love have as much chance of making it as anyone else.
posted
Of course some relaionships can work - BUT in seven years here I HAVE NOT SEEN ONE THAT HAS. (Small age gaps where children are a possibility are outside this field).
Please please please don't quote all the new relationships at me (anything under ten years). Give them time. It is business. That's what the men call it and they laugh about it between themselves. Many actually say that they have to get drunk to make love to their wives. (Honestly - and no I am not a fat ugly old woman who is jealous and afraid to look in the mirror - but I do accept that bikinis are for young women)
Also, the men themselves have many problems with their family, neighbours and friends etc., because everyone knows that they have married for money and have sold themselves. As they walk down the street, comments are thrown. "Jedda" is something that crops up regularly. Grandmother.
Does PRChick live here? I thought from an earlier posting that she lived in the States - which is an entirely different proposition. I have never visited the States and would not give advice on what is acceptable there.
Patience here is lengthy and when it comes to money it is almost infinite. I am not saying this because my relationship went wrong. It did not go wrong. He is still hovering in the background and would move in tomorrow if I would let him. He rings several times each day to tell me how much he loves me. He denies that he ever took a penny from me or that he has ever been 'unfaithful'. Of course, he is an "honest and honourable man". As all the men that marry older women are. I could choose to believe him. I could continue the dream. All I did was wake up and try applying some damage limitation.
If Gege and others apply the damage limitation early then they will be OK. If not then they suffer for their foolishness. Not the foolishness in falling in love - that is out of their hands - but in believing their own fairy tales. Because it really is total illusion and they will find themselves a mirage in their own lives.
BUT IF YOU KNOW THAT AND ACCEPT IT THEN GET ON WITH THE RELATIONSHIP AND ENJOY ITS PLEASURES WHILE THEY ARE ON OFFER. Let's face it, none of us would have had the same chance to grab at youth again in Europe.
(Again please don't tell me about all the offers - I have them too - but only a few are from men twenty plus years my junior whereas here the offers flood in from all areas).
Just the observations of someone who lives here and has heard tales of woe from hundreds of different women who lived in Never Never Land until their wings got burned. Never Never land is a nice place though even though it contains second and third wives (which the women do accept regardless of how much they swear that they will not).
You pays your money and your takes you choice. But, you will pay the money.
Edited for this bit: If age does not matter, why is everyone horrified at 40 plus year age gaps? (Or even a fifty plus age gap that I know of),
[This message has been edited by Luxorlover (edited 25 August 2004).]
posted
I agree with all you say LL. I am very astute.The minute I am asked for money I will be gone.It is as simple as that. I am old fashioned and have old fashion values. I have not gone imto this with my eyes closed,why does a young hansome very charming man want me,that is what I am finding out.But there is no way anyone in this world will extract my hard earned cash from me...well maybe my daughter but then she was born with a health warning on her. I am not stupid.No rose coloured specs here. I will just enjoy it for as long as it lasts. Well I must go and catch my flight now.I have an appointment with my doctor in Cairo. he is 20 years my junior,but then you already know that dont you.I will try and keep up in Cairo.Good topic though,was'nt it!
Posts: 343 | From: Wiltshire, England | Registered: Mar 2004
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The thing to remember is that when you are young money means little as whatever you lose you can earn back - but you can't when you are older and an old age in poverty is not a pleasant thought. Only risk what you can afford to lose. Keep that money for your daughter - she is the one that deserves it.
Another thought is that no matter how old you are there will always be another young man (in Luxor) waiting to take over from the one that went
Keep a lock on your purse and a safety net under your heart and you will do fine.
quote:Originally posted by Ge Ge: . Well I must go and catch my flight now.I have an appointment with my doctor in Cairo. he is 20 years my junior,but then you already know that dont you.
posted
Could not resist one last look before I go to airport.Thankyou so much really for all your advice.Whatever you have said Carol I have taken on board.Where are you in Egypt.Maybe on my next visit we can meet up,and you will see I am not a wrinkled up old prune(only joking). I will be back in a few days and going to Cairo first week October.
Take care.
Posts: 343 | From: Wiltshire, England | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
I never said you were a wrinkled old prune and never thought it. I actually admire you. You have obviously worked hard in your life to have multiple homes and a business and would be someone I would seek advice from or listen to your knowledge on such subjects because you would know the facts. I know nothing about business or buying homes but I do know about Egyptian men and their culture. Be careful and my advice would be don't do it. As LL said establish yourself in Egypt as an idividual don't do anything with this man and never never believe him if he says he doesn't want children etc. In the UK at the moment but if our paths cross in Egypt I would love to meet you.
Posts: 156 | Registered: Aug 2004
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posted
I know of one couple who are married about 12 years who commute between England and Egypt (winter months in Egypt). She is from London and now in her late 60's, he is Egyptian , circa.37 years. Believe it or not they appear to be a couple "in love" and apparently met when he took her out for a trip on his fellucca so many years ago and then got married within a few days (orfi). They then arranged a legal marriage with the Ministry of Justice in Cairo. Who knows maybe age does not matter. 30 year age gap here!!!!
Posts: 48 | Registered: Jun 2004
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posted
But as you said they spend half their time in England - I take it that he now has a British passport.
Posts: 2235 | From: Jail | Registered: Jun 2004
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quote:Originally posted by lotusflower: I know of one couple who are married about 12 years who commute between England and Egypt (winter months in Egypt). She is from London and now in her late 60's, he is Egyptian , circa.37 years. Believe it or not they appear to be a couple "in love" and apparently met when he took her out for a trip on his fellucca so many years ago and then got married within a few days (orfi). They then arranged a legal marriage with the Ministry of Justice in Cairo. Who knows maybe age does not matter. 30 year age gap here!!!!
Thanks for that little story.
This thread became really weird. GeGe received many advises, opinions and - sadly - even insults. At the end of the day these people are all adults and can live their lives however they want. Its their right of privacy.......
Posts: 30135 | From: The owner of this website killed ES....... | Registered: Feb 2004
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posted
Privacy is forfeit as soon as a posting is made on the internet. To expect otherwise is to run with the hares and chase with hounds. Which is what a lot of moderators do quite unprofessionally.
Everything that is posted on internet forums (photos, personal details, etc) is in the public domain.
GeGe posted her story - privacy ended. She knew what to expect (she only has to look at some other lines to see what happens when the claws get sharpened) and I get the impression that she actually enjoyed the debate.
[This message has been edited by Luxorlover (edited 26 August 2004).]
posted
Lotus its like LL said he has his British passport no doubt. And I'm sure that there is an Egyptian wife tucked away somewhere or at least in the pipeline. It's so sad the whole thing but it is the TRUTH and the FACTS which everyone for some reason wants to deny. Why deny the enevitable it just causes more pain in the end. But khalas you can only say the same things so many times. Yes these people are all adults but maybe they should start thinking like them.
Posts: 156 | Registered: Aug 2004
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posted
Lotus. I think I know who you mean, I see them when them come to luxor and they seem ok together but I have to agree with Carol and LL. I dont know about Carol but LL and I have lived here for a few years now and have had our eyes well opened.
Have you moved over here yet? If not when are you coming
quote:Originally posted by Luxorlover: Privacy is forfeit as soon as a posting is made on the internet. To expect otherwise is to run with the hares and chase with hounds. Which is what a lot of moderators do quite unprofessionally.
Everything that is posted on internet forums (photos, personal details, etc) is in the public domain.
GeGe posted her story - privacy ended. She knew what to expect (she only has to look at some other lines to see what happens when the claws get sharpened) and I get the impression that she actually enjoyed the debate.
[This message has been edited by Luxorlover (edited 26 August 2004).]
posted
I am 30 years old and I would not consider to marry a younger man in Egypt. In my opinion the men don't do it. Not a real lasting marriage.
I know an Egyptian girl who is 34 and she was courting an Egyptian man of 30. They discussed marriage but at the end of the day he refused because of her age. She is still with the age where she could still give him kids but he could not handle the fact that she was older.
I do not know any Egyptian marriage where the girl is older.
This is just my opinion but please advise me if I am wrong.
Also when you live here you see what the male part of these 'happy' unions do while their 'wives' are in Europe for 48 weeks of the year. A man here who marries a woman much older than himself who is in another country most of the time - married for money. Even if they are in this country most of the time - the men still married them for their money.
I know of several 'marriages' where the husbands goe to their family home every night even though they have been with their European wives for years. The European wives are the day job - and it pays lucratively.
posted
Thats another thing I really don't get. How can any person seriously believe that they are in a real marriage when they only spend a few weeks of the year with their husbands. It's just not normal in western culture or Egyptian. Being married is about sharing your life with someone not a few weeks here and there.
Posts: 156 | Registered: Aug 2004
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posted
Getting back to the original question. I think age difference does matter in a relationship in Egypt when the woman is older. It is considered normal here in Egypt for the man to be older. In some cases the man can be 15-20 years older and classed as normal. I think the average age difference is that the man is 5-7 years older than the girl.
The men have to be financially ready to marry which is usually around 30-35 years old and can provide a home for his future wife and family.
quote:Originally posted by Luxorlover: Joshua - perhaps, as this is a line that relates more to women than men, it might also say that women make more posts than men do.
It might also say that women can carry a discussion for a long time without getting into foul language and insults and having it deleted. .
If you can quote me insulting copy and paste it here/if you can't then there is only one thing you can do! I leave it to you to guess...
UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!
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