If he is getting your financial support, he will do anything you want. Any man from any culture would.

But Egyptian culture won't show romantic/sexual affection in public. Men and women even spouses don't cuddle in pubic.

In the west though, it can be normal. It depends how long he has been here and how acclimated he is to western society.

quote:

---

Originally posted by sonomod:
If he wants to have an honest relationship with you, he will show his honest feelings.

If he is getting your financial support, he will do anything you want. Any man from any culture would.

But Egyptian culture won't show romantic/sexual affection in public. Men and women even spouses don't cuddle in pubic.

In the west though, it can be normal. It depends how long he has been here and how acclimated he is to western society.

Don't freak out, if he gets his freak out in private with you. Thats what actually matters.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by confusedusgirl:
but his strong sense of self and being a man of his word make up for that. Plus he is very expressive when we are in private.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Samia:
Confused, take the word of Sonomod, she is completely correct.
Egyptian men, if they have respect for their woman, will not show affection in public...it's only done by disrespectful men( here in Hurghada, anyway..) Here it means... Look guys,I've good a tourist to **** !)
If a muslim guy respects a woman, he will be VERRRRRYYY affectionate in private, but definitely not in the street!!
So...congratulations.. you've got a respectful man!!

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by newcomer:
...Apart from the fact that he is doing it outside marriage! To show full respect for a woman an Egyptian man would wait until after they were married to show any affection.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by confusedusgirl:
Wow. All of your replies help me so much. But I am wondering, should our relantionship progress, will his family not like me instantly because I am not Muslim? I do not know much about the religion, but what I do know, I repect. I would consider converting to be with him, but I wonder if my not being born a Muslim will make it always an issue. His parents live here in the States as well, but are very traditional. I am Lakota Indian myself, so I am not Christian, but I do have beliefs that I have grown up with. However, we are taught that when you marry, the man leads the family, as does his faith. Would I have to renounce mine completely?
Again thanks for all of your replies! And you are right. He is such a good man!

---

IMHO you should never convert because of a man but because you believe in the faith. Only your boyfriend can tell you whether his famiy will be OK or not. You can not genralise about this.

quote:

---

Originally posted by confusedusgirl:
Wow. All of your replies help me so much. But I am wondering, should our relantionship progress, will his family not like me instantly because I am not Muslim? I do not know much about the religion, but what I do know, I repect. I would consider converting to be with him, but I wonder if my not being born a Muslim will make it always an issue. His parents live here in the States as well, but are very traditional. I am Lakota Indian myself, so I am not Christian, but I do have beliefs that I have grown up with. However, we are taught that when you marry, the man leads the family, as does his faith. Would I have to renounce mine completely?
Again thanks for all of your replies! And you are right. He is such a good man!

---

I am Lutheran (Prostestant) and my hubby pushed like crazy for the first year to get me to convert. Then someone wise told him it would only push me in te opposite direction. He was right.

And whether or not his family will accept you. It really depends. If they are educated and live in a urban area, let alone take their faith seriously (I mean actually reading the Quran for themselves, not fatwas or audiocassette recordings) then you might have a chance.

About 2 decades ago when Arabs came to the west in droves a Muslim man would accept just about anything. They grew up in the hippy 60's. And at that time with the civil rights movement and feminism coming about, Arabs had a very warm acceptance of western society. But after so many terrorism and regime changes in the Arab/Muslim world, the west started to notice the Arab/Muslim world in a negative light. Both sides fed off of half-truths and evil stereotypes. So young Arab/Muslim men now want to hold onto their culture and faith more than ever.

Second prong of this is, the west (especially USA) demands less assimulation. We can respect an immigrant to hold onto their culture and faith more than 50 years ago. There are laws to protect expresssion of culture and practices of faith that were never there before.

So I see a difference between a Muslim Egyptian man who has been here for 25 years. He drinks in bars, his wife raises his kids Christian, he doesn't eat pork though, he is very secular and doesn't pray. But he does have an open mind, and is much more true to Allah in ways the younger generation coming to the west could never grasp. My husband is almost the total opposite. Watching these two knock heads and be forced to work together I find many opportunities to point out how he can be an American while remaining an ardent Egyptian and modern Muslim.

Being educated on his culture and his faith, while trying to find similarities between the two, while respecting the differences (don't pay homeage to the differences, it bothers him more than you). After due time my husband will come home and ask questions of the bible and christian doctrine in order to find out what is Wahabism and what is the fact.

[/B][/QUOTE]

check this, this might help.... http://www.egyptsearch.com/forums/Forum10/HTML/000176.html

quote:

---

Originally posted by confusedusgirl:
Wow. All of your replies help me so much. But I am wondering, should our relantionship progress, will his family not like me instantly because I am not Muslim? I do not know much about the religion, but what I do know, I repect. I would consider converting to be with him, but I wonder if my not being born a Muslim will make it always an issue. His parents live here in the States as well, but are very traditional. I am Lakota Indian myself, so I am not Christian, but I do have beliefs that I have grown up with. However, we are taught that when you marry, the man leads the family, as does his faith. Would I have to renounce mine completely?
Again thanks for all of your replies! And you are right. He is such a good man!

---

Although Joshsua is scaremongering as usual, he does have a point in that taking the decision to become a Muslim is a serious one. Its a committment that has to be done wholeheartedly and with full understanding of the committment you are making, its not something to be done on paper just to get married. Islam is a way of life, not just "something you do on Sundays" and you need to truly believe in it before you decide to accept it.

Please try to understand more and more about him and the religion, and especially his expectation about your conduct in the future.

If you really want to marry him, my suggestion is to keep your present religion for the time being if you are a Christian. You can convert later after at least two to three years study of the religion.

Perhaps this man is God's way of leading you to Islam? I'm not saying it is and I'm not saying it isn't. But you should not ignore facts.

I was Christian previously (American born) and converted to Islam and have never been happier. It isn't for everyone, but then again, neither is Christianity or Judism.

But for sure don't do it just for him. Otherwise you will end up regretting it and resenting him. That isn't fair either way.

Also, be careful in this, once you have learned about Islam and you choose not to accept the words of God (Allah), it is forever (as we believe) branded within you that you ignored the words of God.

You will find many similiarities in Islam that you find in Christianity, stories you have known from the Bible are almost identicial within the Qu'ran and some practices and beliefs. It is not all that different once you start learning.

If you are interested, let me know and I will be happy to send you a copy of the meaning of the Quran (in English) my treat where ever you are. Just let me know.

Best of luck to you either way.
Salaam.

it would be my pleasure.
if you shoot me your email address I'll contact you privately that way.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Gail:
nooralhaq,

Would you be willing to send me a copy of the meaning of the Quran (in English)? I am very interested in learning more about it and the similarities between Islam and Christianity.

---

Hate to bud in here,
http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/2800 http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/3434 http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/7440

Is the Koran in english and this is a study guide:
http://www.bibliomania.com/4/-/frameset.html?info=true&queryText=Quran

quote:

---

Originally posted by Gail:
nooralhaq,
Thanks!

---

I can probably mail it out to you Monday or so Gail. Enjoy, and take care.

Salaam.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Gail:
nooralhaq,
Thanks for e-mailing me the information. Could you take a moment to delete my e-mail address from your last post? Thank you.

sonomod,
Thank you for providing the web sites. I don't consider it butting in. It was thoughtful of you to help me out.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by nooralhaq:
No, not at all. It is my gift.
Good luck.
Salaam.

---

I feel bad because for some reason I thought it was a smaller, pamphlet-type book and not a regular sized book. Did you buy this at my request? Please tell me because I want to pay for it. You spent a lot of money for postage as well. If I had known what the expense would be, I would not have asked (my mother taught us never to do that). You are awesome!!

quote:

---

Originally posted by Gail:
noor,
Yes! I got it on Wednesday, but I'm walking around in a fog right now. My apologies for not letting you know.

I feel bad because for some reason I thought it was a smaller, pamphlet-type book and not a regular sized book. Did you buy this at my request? Please tell me because I want to pay for it. You spent a lot of money for postage as well. If I had known what the expense would be, I would not have asked (my mother taught us never to do that). You are awesome!!

Also, I want to take the time to thank you for your advice about my "boyfriend." I have taken it and have not contacted him (although he has contacted me). And thanks for offering your e-mail in case I need to talk more. With the help of my family, my friends around home, and my EgyptSearch friends, I am feeling better. I know that it's not the most devastating thing that can happen to a person, but it certainly tore the wind from my sails.

---

Gail, thanks to God you received it!
I would not dream of taking money from you, enjoy it when you get the chance!

quote:

---

Originally posted by LindseyRN:
I am an American emergency nurse who has most recently been in a serious relationship with a very attractive Egytian doctor. I also am a very touchy, feely person and have noticed so loud and clear that he displays absolutely no affection at all. None is public and some at home, lots during sex, of course. This is something that I'm having such a hard time with. I even asked him if it was part of his culture and he said no and that he would try harder and that he knew he was disappointing me. I'm lost. He sounds so sincere, after having this conversation several times he has not shown be any change with this. It makes me feel sorta like I'm trash and that he isn't taking my feelings into consideration at all. Please help me understand. He tells me that he hasn't been in a serious relationship at all really and that he's used to being single. But, my thoughts are that if he was really into me and and cared about me he would show me. He never calls when he says he will, i mean like hours late, if ever. I wonder at times if I didn't call him how long it would take for him to contact me........probably days! I'm beginning to wonder if "if it waddles like a duck and quacks like a duck, it's a duck" would be applicable here, meaning that he doesn't call and show me affection because he's really not that into me. That's a hard pill to swallow

---

I am suprised to here you say that he denied it was part of his culture. You would never see public displays of affection between an Egyptian married couple and even in the home it would only be if they were alone. Modesty is a very Arabic/Muslim trait and quite charming. As long as he is affectionate in private that is normal. As to whether he cares for you, only time will answer this question. Try the web site www.marriedtoanarab.com for more help and advice about Egyptian culture.

I do think it has indeed nothing to do with culture. I mean, you will find people like that in every country, unfortunately. But since it's so important to you, tell him you can't stand with his behavior anymore, that he really has to make efforts. You're not going to stay with someone who makes you suffer like this. And not calling when he's late or when he says he will is not a matter of showing or not affection, it's a matter of being rude or not. You deserve much better than that. Tell him again, very clearly, how important this affection side is to you, and then see if he really cares. And why not trying not to call him for a while? I know, it's very hard to do, but believe me, it works really well! It will help you see your situation clearer too.

One more thing to take in consideration is the fact he may feel guilty. I think you are not married aren't you? You know premarital relations are forbidden in our religion. What are your plans for the future? Maybe he will show more affection the day he is married. Just make sure you are the one he wants to marry...

quote:

---

Originally posted by akshar:
I am suprised to here you say that he denied it was part of his culture. You would never see public displays of affection between an Egyptian married couple and even in the home it would only be if they were alone. Modesty is a very Arabic/Muslim trait and quite charming. As long as he is affectionate in private that is normal. As to whether he cares for you, only time will answer this question. Try the web site www.marriedtoanarab.com for more help and advice about Egyptian culture.

---

If he is an Egyptian outside of the southern region (Not Saadi) then public display of affection are not mainstream acceptable behavior but it does happen. Take for instance Montazah Palace Beach and the corniche in both Alexandria Med. coast and Cairo along the Nile. Its just not in your face like the west they choose the time and place where they can get away with it.

Being that its post 9/11 and how Egypt deals with catastrophic illness/injury and how the west springs into action during a crisis he might be having trouble adjusting to the differences in how emergency health care is dispatched. Plus he might be osctricized in ways that are very evident. If doctors are going to give each other a difficult time they will be much more concealed, making the pain even worse. I have worked in health care for 2 years, prejudice is being protected as an American right and privilage, not many show compassion towards foreign doctors any more.

Plus you are forgetting that fornication, or adultry is considered sinful to the extreme to Arabs Christian or Muslim. So the possiblity of him feeling remorse and guilt is a huge thing to consider. Plus being a doctor he might be expected to marry someone handpicked from home or at least someone that would increase his family's social status. I dated a doctor from Pakistan and though the cultures are different the socail expectations are similar.

My brother-in-law is a pharmacist/doctor and when he announced his engagement all hell broke lose. Father in law spent 2 months living with his parents in the village and wouldn't come home until his son announced he was going to marry a female doctor, not a English teacher. Luckily I am his favorite daughter-in-law who managed to talk dad out of demanding my own husband finish medical school so I let him know he was embarassing and behaving like an ass. Male doctors are expected to marry up or marry a female doctor, its the platinum card status of marriage suitors and women cannot marry down, but a man can, if he does its really not okay.

Mind you keep this in mind, it might not be even close to whats going on in his mind, but discussing it might just make it worse. Observe!

Here's a book I read about 2 years ago that really helped:

Understanding Arabs: A Guide for Westerners

Margaret K. Omar Nydell

Product Details:
ISBN: 1877864153
Format: Paperback, 264pp
Pub. Date: October 2002
Publisher: Intercultural Press
Edition Description: 3RD
Edition Number: 3
Barnes & Noble Sales Rank: 26,211
http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=u56JSEVBKg&isbn=1877864153&TXT=Y&itm=5

And that www.marriedtoanarab.com is a complete joke of a site. Very little has to do with Egyptian customs and manners. At least the book above notes that particular customs and manners are unique to certain nationalities and communities.

But hey he might surprise you and instantly ask you to marry him. Usually Muslims when in physical relationships bring up marriage quickly, if you don't take him seriously or if you demand to take it slow while continuing to enjoy a physical relationship he might think you are sleazy. Its a catch 22, sometimes the marriage proposal is to applease their guilt sometimes he really does want to get married without the complications of traditional courtship. Traditional Egyptian courtship is more dramatic than any Shakspearian play.

Good luck, things will change completely in a minute, and sex with love can be a massively exhausting courtship with Arabs. Start taking your multi-vitamin now.

Oh and have a good relationship with your mother or fake it, it can make all the difference. Mother like daughter to the extreme.

quote:

---

Originally posted by RaniaMe:
Dear Lindsey,

And not calling when he's late or when he says he will is not a matter of showing or not affection, it's a matter of being rude or not.

---

Its not considered rude to be a few hours late or not calling. That is a western custom to be ontime and call when not going to show up.

Why do you think Arabs/Egyptians are going to have the same attitude towards time and appointments that westerns do?

And in the medical profession being tardy is no big deal for a doctor, except when its with his superiors. Then you know he's having a hard time acclimating. I've seen it, it takes foreigners a long time in the medical profession to deal with the 'time factor'.

And of course women are expected to be accomodating and forgiving, so demanding this might actually create massive problems on top of the 'time factor' at work. Women are expected to be a man's oasis of stress-free environment. At least in courtship.

Anyway, the guy I'm seeing is not comfortable with public displays of affection. And I respect that completely. Think about it. If that's the way he was brought up, it isn't something that he will be able to change easily. Try to see things through his eyes. I wouldn't be offended unless he outright shuns you.

He is, however, extremely affectionate and caring when we're alone.

As for the calling when he says... this is one of my pet peeves. He will often say, "I'll call you later," which to me has ALWAYS meant later THAT DAY. To him it means later that day or the next day... I asked a couple of my male friends about it and they said that when they say it (and they're American, so it's not necessarily cultural) they mean what my guy means. Who knew? I've stopped getting upset by that. You have to pick your battles as they say.

But you're very right concerning doctors who have to marry someone from the same or a higher social class. I was a little shy to tell Lindsey about this, but she has to know it.

This is a valuable lesson for me to learn. I got upset a couple weeks ago because he said he would call me in thirty minutes and almost three hours went by! Now I understand.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Gail:
sonomod,
I'm so glad to hear you say that this sense of urgency when it comes to time is a Western thing. It explains so much!! Here in the states, at least on the East (where I live) and West coasts, people are always rushing around and living life at a fast pace. But in the Southern part of the US, life is lived at a very slow pace. People aren't slaves to the clock.

This is a valuable lesson for me to learn. I got upset a couple weeks ago because he said he would call me in thirty minutes and almost three hours went by! Now I understand.

One question though... why does he wear a watch if he's going to ignore it?

---

oooh I'm going to have to disagree with you.
I'm from Dallas and have been to the East Coast, West Coast, North, Midwest, other Southern states, believe you me, we are just as anal about rushing around and being on time as the next person. We consider it rude if someone is more than 10-15 minutes late.

quote:

---

Originally posted by akshar:
I am suprised to here you say that he denied it was part of his culture. You would never see public displays of affection between an Egyptian married couple and even in the home it would only be if they were alone. Modesty is a very Arabic/Muslim trait and quite charming. As long as he is affectionate in private that is normal. As to whether he cares for you, only time will answer this question. Try the web site www.marriedtoanarab.com for more help and advice about Egyptian culture.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by sonomod:
If he is an Egyptian outside of the southern region (Not Saadi) then public display of affection are not mainstream acceptable behavior but it does happen. Take for instance Montazah Palace Beach and the corniche in both Alexandria Med. coast and Cairo along the Nile. Its just not in your face like the west they choose the time and place where they can get away with it.

Being that its post 9/11 and how Egypt deals with catastrophic illness/injury and how the west springs into action during a crisis he might be having trouble adjusting to the differences in how emergency health care is dispatched. Plus he might be osctricized in ways that are very evident. If doctors are going to give each other a difficult time they will be much more concealed, making the pain even worse. I have worked in health care for 2 years, prejudice is being protected as an American right and privilage, not many show compassion towards foreign doctors any more.

Plus you are forgetting that fornication, or adultry is considered sinful to the extreme to Arabs Christian or Muslim. So the possiblity of him feeling remorse and guilt is a huge thing to consider. Plus being a doctor he might be expected to marry someone handpicked from home or at least someone that would increase his family's social status. I dated a doctor from Pakistan and though the cultures are different the socail expectations are similar.

My brother-in-law is a pharmacist/doctor and when he announced his engagement all hell broke lose. Father in law spent 2 months living with his parents in the village and wouldn't come home until his son announced he was going to marry a female doctor, not a English teacher. Luckily I am his favorite daughter-in-law who managed to talk dad out of demanding my own husband finish medical school so I let him know he was embarassing and behaving like an ass. Male doctors are expected to marry up or marry a female doctor, its the platinum card status of marriage suitors and women cannot marry down, but a man can, if he does its really not okay.

Mind you keep this in mind, it might not be even close to whats going on in his mind, but discussing it might just make it worse. Observe!

Here's a book I read about 2 years ago that really helped:

Understanding Arabs: A Guide for Westerners

Margaret K. Omar Nydell

Product Details:
ISBN: 1877864153
Format: Paperback, 264pp
Pub. Date: October 2002
Publisher: Intercultural Press
Edition Description: 3RD
Edition Number: 3
Barnes & Noble Sales Rank: 26,211
http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=u5 6JSEVBKg&isbn=1877864153&TXT=Y&itm=5

And that www.marriedtoanarab.com is a complete joke of a site. Very little has to do with Egyptian customs and manners. At least the book above notes that particular customs and manners are unique to certain nationalities and communities.

But hey he might surprise you and instantly ask you to marry him. Usually Muslims when in physical relationships bring up marriage quickly, if you don't take him seriously or if you demand to take it slow while continuing to enjoy a physical relationship he might think you are sleazy. Its a catch 22, sometimes the marriage proposal is to applease their guilt sometimes he really does want to get married without the complications of traditional courtship. Traditional Egyptian courtship is more dramatic than any Shakspearian play.

Good luck, things will change completely in a minute, and sex with love can be a massively exhausting courtship with Arabs. Start taking your multi-vitamin now.

Oh and have a good relationship with your mother or fake it, it can make all the difference. Mother like daughter to the extreme.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by confusedusgirl:
thanks to everyone for the insight shared. I have come to the conclusion that we are not for each other at this point in time. I was raised in a very emotional expressive family ( Lakota Indian culture) and it seems as if everything about us clashed. He thought I was too demanding, I thought him to removed. Culture is the same in what the expecations are for women, yet he still found me not supportive enough. I have come to the conclusion that while he was dating women outside of his religion, somehwhere in the back of his mind, he was most comfortable with someone from a background similar to his and was subconsiously breaking the relationship.
Thanks again. I will say that dating a man of such depth of charater will make it very hard to date an ordinary man.

---

So as you can see it is in their nature to pretend like there isn't cultural differences, but then act upon their cultural habits.

And my husband isn't affectionate much at all, its his nature to be reserved. But if I don't refer to him as tall, handsome and crabby at least twice a day he starts to scowl at me and demand to know why I am angry at him.

So he's a late alot, not intentionally, and he likes to pretend that he doesn't enjoy flattery and then gets pissed off when I don't keep that flattery coming. He's not your average Egyptian he lives in daily pain from a dislocating shoulder that doctors are skeptical about doing surgery on. So this personally is dictated by the level of pain he is in. Other wise its dictated by how many people call him a 'terrorist' on any given shift at work.

Being Arab in America right now isn't pleasant. And I see Arabs trying much more vigorously to seclude into their community and preserve their cultural traditions while becoming more socailly conservative. But this is a different state and things are going haywire here in so many different ethnic communities anyway.

i would also be very interested in getting the meaning of the koran in english- my email is listed- thanks so much

i dont want to generalize all egyptian men cause everyone is their own person, but i know that with my fiance the time thing became a big issue. in america, as u know- if u say u will do something at a certain time- then u better do it unless u have a good excuse not to. when i first met my fiance, he would say- ill meet you at this time (on the computer) and show up like an hour or two late and wonder why i was upset. however, i have to say i am so blessed because he saw how this upset me and he has made such an amazing effort to be on time or even early. he told me that the time thing is not that big a deal there. like i said- i dont want to generalize all egyptians- so anyone reading this- please dont take offense- i am just saying what i have experienced.

quote:

---

Originally posted by LindseyRN:
I am an American emergency nurse who has most recently been in a serious relationship with a very attractive Egytian doctor. I also am a very touchy, feely person and have noticed so loud and clear that he displays absolutely no affection at all. None is public and some at home, lots during sex, of course. This is something that I'm having such a hard time with. I even asked him if it was part of his culture and he said no and that he would try harder and that he knew he was disappointing me. I'm lost. He sounds so sincere, after having this conversation several times he has not shown be any change with this. It makes me feel sorta like I'm trash and that he isn't taking my feelings into consideration at all. Please help me understand. He tells me that he hasn't been in a serious relationship at all really and that he's used to being single. But, my thoughts are that if he was really into me and and cared about me he would show me. He never calls when he says he will, i mean like hours late, if ever. I wonder at times if I didn't call him how long it would take for him to contact me........probably days! I'm beginning to wonder if "if it waddles like a duck and quacks like a duck, it's a duck" would be applicable here, meaning that he doesn't call and show me affection because he's really not that into me. That's a hard pill to swallow

---

Otherwise, if you mean that you are living together simply like two roommates who are also having hot sex but that's about all that connects you, then isn't it just a convenience relationship maybe? I did not know Egyptians are capable of one, they seem so craving for emotions, but maybe a different culture (i.e. when they live somewhere in the West) reconditions them, too?

Because if he loves you, if he is crazy about you, how can he then be indifferent in his behaviour? And it is one or the other, I believe. My boyfriend sometimes hates me, but he even hates me passionately, and I even love him hate me because you know it must really be deep love if you cannot help it even against things that make you mad :). I just need to feel him and I automatically think "oh, it probably isn't so important at all" and I forgive him, and it seems that he does the same. It's the best relationship roller-coaster I've been in, really, am enjoying every moment of it, because he loves me but stands his own and it is so rare among men I think. Though he is just so horrible, he tickles me, it's just the most horrible thing I know, and then we have these water fights with cold water (as cold as it gets in Egypt :) but he is coming to my country soon, ho-hum..hum..hummm.. :), I almost hold my own in these. All-in-all I feel I'm with big strong very kind being who also has a most amusing strong temper and really how much excitement can one even expect from a relationship?? considering my main previous complaint was that men in my country are so boring if they are trustworthy, while if they are not boring they are not trustworthy either. And they are not fun of the playful kind. Now I'm all satisfied and over.

(Writing it just for mutual exchange of experience, my dears, not for boasting, or OK maybe just a tiny little bit :) because am really really so happy partly also because I've always believed that if you want more in life then you just have to be patient and, so-to-say, wait it out, contrary to people who either lose faith or find it easier to go for a convenience solution or a less satisfying solution of simply having a life companion, love or no love. Or then maybe some have lower expectations and are indeed even happy with less. Who knows indeed, everyone may even not have the luck of meeting HIM in the wide world, so what do you do, stay an old lonely ront? But in my case I waited out and was not satisfied with less because I really did not want one of these relationships and these families that to my mind did not seem to add any value to one's life, where they just pretend everything is alright while secretly everything is crumbling, and, since divorce is relatively more difficult in our cultures here and a strong signal something is wrong with you and thus to be avoided at all costs if you are a weak self-protectional person, one of the weaknesses of our mentality here, then he takes a lover and she finds a "soulmate" and children who see and know all get an altoghether wrong picture of what love really is, or even they will never know what it is and then also cannot express it themselves. A total disrespectful wasting of each other.

So - if you have any faith and hope then just wait out until you find a man who is madly in love with you because why settle for less - or are you less??? ;) There is one rule about that - NEVER, EVER let youself believe you are not worthy of the best treatment, because as a human and even from the more beautiful and gracious side of these - you are!

No harm in trying it out in the meanwhile - you will know better what it is what is not worth of your time and effort. I have about one strong rule abou tit: does the person I am with, make me be a better person or a wors person. If he behaves in a way that turns me into a nagging bitch then bye-bye, I do not wish spend my life being a nagging bitch. I wish be a smiling fairy.