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Author Topic: travelling in egypt with egyptian boyfriend. prblems with hotels?
lotusgirl
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Hello,
i was wondering if someone can help me. I am planning a trip to Egypt to visit a guy i met last time I was there. He is Egyptian. We are planning to go to Alexandrian, Cairo and Luxor together. Are we going to be able to stay in the same room in hotels? Or do we need 2 separate rooms. Can he even visit me in my hotel? Is he going to be harassed? What is the situation there? I know it's illegal for Egyptians to have pre-marital sex, but is it really enforced by hotels? Is police going to be stopping us if we try to go up to my room together. Are they going to come knocking on our doors at night? I don't even know if I'm going to want to have sex with the guy but I just don't want somebody else telling me that I can't. And I don't really want to disrespect or offend anyone either. please help/

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Chef Mick
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answer ...NO to the first 2, and yes to the rest
you wont be able to stay in the same room or even visit his or your rooms
good luck to you and stay safe

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lotusgirl
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Wow! really? even in nice hotels? even during the day? what if we just want to sit and chat together in the middle of the day? that's troubling! so we will not be able to spend any time together in private?
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Chef Mick
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before i was married to my husband , i had gone over to visit and NO HOTEL would let us stay together or visit each other in private....we had to wait till we got to his familys house to be alone., the next time i went we had got an orfi marriage license just to stay together. the 3 timed i went we were married, so we didn't have to worry anymore
your boyfriend has to be slick and knows where to go ..or else it will be a no go...sorry

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lotusgirl
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So, the orfi marriage license is accepted by the hotels? i thought it wasn't.
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Chef Mick
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it was for us. but that was in 2005 so they might have changed,but i dont think so.
we had a friend who was a lawyer draw up the papers within a day...then we were good to go [Razz]

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lotusgirl
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..and what do you mean "your boyfriend has to be slick and knows where to go" ? go where?
and is he going to be in trouble with the law?
thank you for your replies btw

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Chef Mick
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maybe he knows some places that you can go to be alone..but be very careful, as they are very strict there.
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lotusgirl
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thank you. but what can happen if we get "busted". [Smile] do we get arrested? is it serious? for both of us?
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Chef Mick
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you might have to leave the country and he could go to jail.you don't want to mess with the police there.
hopefully someone else on here can tell you more as i haven't been there for 2 years...and be patient ..all the ones who live there are sleeping so you might not get a reply till morning

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Clear and QSY
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quote:
Wow! really? even in nice hotels? even during the day?
After my husband and I got married (legal not Orfi), we went out to eat at the JW Marriot in Cairo. This is a 7 star hotel. We considered getting a room and staying the night, but then had to forget the idea because we had left our marriage papers at home. They would not have let us in the room together.

I did a websearch and came up with the 3 links below in which people are discussing this topic.

**********************************************

This topic has been discussed on this forum before:

Hotel question from Egypt Search- 2008

***********************************************

Lonely Planet - Can unmarried people share a hotel in Egypt

***********************************************

Apparently Jordan is not Egypt either. I had friends working in Cairo whose hotel wouldn't allow them to stay in the same room (she's Lebanese), so they had to have the captain of their ship legally marry them so they could get some work done. Granted, they weren't staying at the Four Seasons, but I'm sure it wasn't a "fleapit" by normal backpacker standards either.

in cairo, unmarried foreigners can share a room together. but egyptian men are not allowed to share a room with a female foreigner. i was staying in a middle range hotel. when i asked why this rule was in place, they said that this was to prevent the female tourists being exploited financially and sexually by egpytian men.

Source:

http://www.lonelyplanet.com/thorntree/thread.jspa?threadID=1369291&tstart=0&limit=1000

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Ayisha
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before we married there was a group of us staying in Cairo, they put us women on one floor and the men on another with a guard on our floor [Big Grin]

you dont need to be in a hotel room to talk privately or chat and get to know him, you can do that sitting in a cafe. He may know someone with a flat, if he does its classed as half a red flag, if he has his own shagpad its a full red flag. If you dont mind red flags go for it.

If 'caught' you wont be deported as you're western so already classed as 'loose' but he will get kalabosh for a few days possibly.

No problems sharing hotel rooms if he was not Egyptian.

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marydot
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orfi marriage license will be your better option. If it dont work out as you both planned either you or your partner can ripe it up.But if you are both serious then get married at the MOJ. Be careful as your not on your own home ground and the laws are different there compared to where you are.
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Cheekyferret
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Even us English folk who date English have problems at times if we are un-married. I recall the one time my partner had a new bowaab and he refused to let me in... he even hit my partner with a stick!!! It was all rectified as by the Madam but the bowaab was not best pleased. Probably jealous!!
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*Dalia*
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quote:
Originally posted by lotusgirl:
Wow! really? even in nice hotels? even during the day? what if we just want to sit and chat together in the middle of the day? that's troubling! so we will not be able to spend any time together in private?

Of course you can spend time together. Not in a hotel room, but in every café, restaurant, club etc.

I don't understand the problem though. If you guys want to be alone with each other, why doesn't your bf rent an apartment? There are countless places available in Cairo and Alex that can be rented on a short-term basis.

Btw., despite what is being said all the time, pre-marital sex is not against the law and nobody can arrest you for it. What's illegal is prostitution, so technically speaking, even if the police should knock on the door when a man and a woman are alone with each other, they don't have a case unless they can prove money has been changing hands.

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Sashyra8
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Him or even you can rent a flat,and that will greatly diminish the probabilites of being bothered by morality law [Roll Eyes] enforcers.
It helps a lot the way specially him looks.Sorry to say,but remember that Egypt is a very class oriented society.Also,the classier,better the area *read expensive*,the less they will mess with you.
Last,but not least,remember that in Egypt ANYTHING can be bribed.

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lotusgirl
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quote:
Originally posted by Sashyra8:
Him or even you can rent a flat,and that will greatly diminish the probabilites of being bothered by morality law [Roll Eyes] enforcers.
It helps a lot the way specially him looks.Sorry to say,but remember that Egypt is a very class oriented society.Also,the classier,better the area *read expensive*,the less they will mess with you.
Last,but not least,remember that in Egypt ANYTHING can be bribed.

Do you mean, if i'm staying in a nicer hotel, like Four Seasons for instance, they will not bother us? And if he looks nice and clean cut, they won't harass him? I wouldn't risk bribing anyone. I wouldn't know how.
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Vesuvius
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quote:
Originally posted by *Dalia*:



even if the police should knock on the door when a man and a woman are alone with each other, they don't have a case unless they can prove money has been changing hands.

Does it count if the money came via Western Union? [Big Grin] [Big Grin]

Sorry couldn't resist, I'll go back into hibernation now [Wink]

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Sashyra8
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quote:
Originally posted by lotusgirl:
quote:
Originally posted by Sashyra8:
Him or even you can rent a flat,and that will greatly diminish the probabilites of being bothered by morality law [Roll Eyes] enforcers.
It helps a lot the way specially him looks.Sorry to say,but remember that Egypt is a very class oriented society.Also,the classier,better the area *read expensive*,the less they will mess with you.
Last,but not least,remember that in Egypt ANYTHING can be bribed.

Do you mean, if i'm staying in a nicer hotel, like Four Seasons for instance, they will not bother us? And if he looks nice and clean cut, they won't harass him? I wouldn't risk bribing anyone. I wouldn't know how.
The more stars the hotel,like 5 stars up,the less likely they will dare to mess up with the foreign client.
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lotusgirl
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quotes from another forum member from the thread "Hotel Questions":My daughter and I just stayed at a hotel in Cairo last summer and her fiancee, an Egyptian, just walked straight up to our room, we never had a problem and no one ever questioned anything. After work each night, he came right to the hotel and we all hung out and he came up to our room and people saw us together every day and not one person ever questioned him or me during our 3 week stay there.


I'm wondering which hotel in cairo this was.

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SherryBlueBerry
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lotusgirl I have been to Egypt on 4 different occasions and stayed with in my man's apartment. We never had any problems except once or twice we were stopped by the police and they asked me if I was his wife...I just said yes I am fine thank you and they left lol.

When we travelled to Hurghada and stayed at the La Pacha, we encountered a problem. The desk clerk said you cannot stay in the same room as the egyptian man. I told him I had paid my money for the week...and I intended to stay there regardless with my egyptian man! There was a mixed race couple standing beside me and I said...look at that black man and fair skinned woman...and I asked them if they were married and they said no. I told the manager that I would not move from the front desk and I would make sure that I went to the travel agent who booked my room and say they were dirty and had bugs...We argued back and forth until the big hotel manager came out front and wanted to know what was going on. I told him I was 50 years old...my man was 53 years old and I was not leaving. He asked Essam to give him his id to hold...and said now go to your room...haha. We went and about 5 minutes later they called the room and said now the egyptian has to leave..I said go to he|| and from then on we never encountered another problem.

When I checked out I told the guy...look at us good...we may be back next year! He said oh no...I hope not..hahahaha.

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FairyDust
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You can use an orfi in hotels or rent an apartment and may or may not have to give the doorman a little cash bonus. I have also had an egyptian man up to my room, you just don't have him walk in with you. Just tell him the room number ahead of time and let him walk in like he is staying there and knows where he is going and it will be ok, but if you have never done it and it makes you nervous then just do an orfi, it is easy simple and it works.
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tina m
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quote:
Originally posted by Vesuvius:
quote:
Originally posted by *Dalia*:



even if the police should knock on the door when a man and a woman are alone with each other, they don't have a case unless they can prove money has been changing hands.

Does it count if the money came via Western Union? [Big Grin] [Big Grin]

Sorry couldn't resist, I'll go back into hibernation now [Wink]

hahahaha
ya u can bribe that guard on yr floor to turn a blind eye huh??
is africa as strict as the arab countries?

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*Dalia*
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quote:
Originally posted by tina kamal:

ya u can bribe that guard on yr floor to turn a blind eye huh?

I have male friends over all the time and never had to bribe anyone. Never would, either. It's nobody's business who comes to my house.

quote:
Originally posted by Vesuvius:

Does it count if the money came via Western Union? [Big Grin] [Big Grin]

[Big Grin] [Big Grin] [Big Grin]
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_
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quote:
Originally posted by *Dalia*:
quote:
Originally posted by tina kamal:

ya u can bribe that guard on yr floor to turn a blind eye huh?

I have male friends over all the time and never had to bribe anyone. Never would, either. It's nobody's business who comes to my house.
Yeah it shouldn't be anyone's business but the truth is it's Egypt and your business is everyone's business - that's at least what they think.

And I remember it really depends on the neighborhood, the house and the bowab. I lived in a couple of places in Cairo and I had the easy going doormen as also the not so tolerant ones.

Of course in a building where they are used to foreigners it's easier to bring people up.

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