I guess the first step in healing is to face everyone and say what has happened. Until now i have been pretty much hiding. Not really hiding but not doing well. I wont give huge details, but enough. Momens interview was to be sunday, Friday he informed me that he was not coming. He does have his reasons, huge reasons, however that doesnt stop the awful devastation. So visa is gone, he told them he didnt want it. Our marriage will soon be over as well, since of course i cant move there for many years. This is not my choice but his, again circumstances. He says he cant destroy my life any further by letting me stay in a marriage where we would be apart so much. So there you have it, approaching the one year anniversary, March 14th, our marriage will soon be finished.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I'm so sorry to hear this MH. I wonder why he decided to back out at the last minute? Just remember things always happen for a reason, hang in there and keep your chin up! Posted by Oldbag (Member # 9889) on :
So sorry Mystic. Its very brave of you to publish it here and it's the first step to healing.
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
Ooooh Sorry, it is a sad story.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
He has good reasons, I understand it mostly, but then again, I dont. Torn on that. I, myself, would prefer to stay in the marriage and work around things until such time we can be together but no one knows when that might be. I just have to accept his decision, nothing i can do to change it. I just dont know how to even begin to accept it or pick up the pieces or move on.. its not just me involved here. Husband and wife complete eachother, now , a huge part is gone. I dont want to let go, cant let go, not yet. I love him too much. Yes, I have to respect his wishes, doesnt mean that i can just stop loving and walk away.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Sad news MH, my thoughts are with you in this difficult time. Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
i am so sorry MH, it is so sad . i wish the best for you Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
MH I am so sorry. It is SUCH a difficult decision for them to up and leave and I really wish he had thought this through with you a lot more if he's backing out now. My husband and I were almost not married because of the seriousness of what his leaving means to his sisters and I'm glad he went through all those emotions before making his final decision.
We're here for you.
Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
chin up Mystic
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Take care Mystic. You know I'm here if you want to chat. x
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
His situation is more than just fears of leaving. I just wish things had not come this far, i wish he had told me when he first knew he would not be able to come instead of waiting until he would likely be here in a month. It would have been alot easier to accept, he didnt want to hurt me, couldnt tell me... but at this point was forced to, couldnt keep pretending he would be here any longer. Yes he loves me, but I guess somethings are bigger than that. I would not make the same choice but i know him, he would never be able to live with himself if he left now, not right now. Thank you all for being there, Yorkie, i am sure you will be reading this. I will be in contact soon, for now i just cant. I am not even working at the moment, took a leave. No, cant afford it but, I cant even go outside my house without folding.
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
Don't want to interfere in your personal life, but don't take a leave from work too long.
4 years ago something really bad happened in my life and I got strength from going to work. Work can be seen as a kind of 'distraction', being away from grief and sorrow. One has to be 'strong' at work, no dark thoughts there. When you come home, then you can cry and feel devastated.
Wish you all the best . It is just an advice, ok? Take care of yourself.
Posted by MissNoor (Member # 12549) on :
Oh my friend my prayers and thoughts are with you...but don't stay away from people who love you..remember I am here for u also...if u everyneed someone to talk to pm for my phone number........I can only imagine your pain...
Posted by CheezyPoof (Member # 8386) on :
I agree with Desertgirl. I find going to work during tough times gives me a kick in the pants to keep going.
Sorry for your situation. I hope you're able to heal and move on.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I tried work guys, I took one step in the door, customers everywhere, they looked up at me and i burst into tears and sank to the floor. Manager picked me up and took me to office. I just cant be around anyone. I thought that going would make me better, it made it worse. People there were so supportive of this whole process, constantly asking of him and how things were going. And its not even being around them, i cant be around any person, not people i know, not ones i dont know. My children are the only ones i can stand being around. I made my family leave me, i dont answer calls. I just cant. I cant go there or anywhere and pretend that I am ok
Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
oh mystic as i read your post my heart is breaking for you, pls try to stay positive. take some time out for yourself and just breathe. my thoughts are with you,
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
Oh MH, I just cannot put my thoughts into words of how I feel for you. I am so so terribly sorry.
You have many friends here on this board who are here for you, sometimes it is easier to express how you feel by writing (typing) than actually letting the words fall from your mouth, then it becomes more of a reality I know.
But I beg you, please use your friends on this board to help us to help you through this difficult time.
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
It's life...
Good that you are here with us instead keeping it all inside.
Now you probably aren't able to concentrate at work - but it WILL take your mind off your problems to a certain degree. Thanks to work, nice people I meet, I'm still sane.
All the best.
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
Mystic, here is a suggestion: focus on your children. They will bring you joy and with time things will get sorted one way or another. Trust me your children will bring you joy if you let them.
Also, see your family doctor for some help.
You need to be healthy for your children, they need you more than anyone else.
Remember, they only have one mother and it is you!
Your doctor will help and everyone here will give you support.
Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
It will take time huni, this is for sure, but when you are ready for us were all here for you with open arms, i think you will find you have really got alot of friends here that care deeply, more than you think. I was terribly worried and have truelly thought the whorst things that have happened to you. im truelly heart broken for you, and wish you all the strength, you really need it, i wish i was there to help, in any way i can, Dont forget im here for you, anytime day or night, never be alone. xxxxx
Posted by Khadija_Diagne (Member # 10149) on :
MH, Please don't shut everyone out. You should not stay locked up in your house very long. Remember your children need you to be strong. I understand your devastation, and I am really sorry. Keep close to your family now, don't shut them out. Right now stay in prayer, and remember Allah is the best of planners. You know how to find me if you need me.
---K
Posted by MK the Most Interlectual (Member # 8356) on :
Oh no.
Never in a million years would I have expected such a heart-wrenching end to such an eternal love saga of such two mentally-stable people.
Posted by Express lane Five beers or less (Member # 14028) on :
quote:Originally posted by MK the Most Interlectual: Oh no.
Never in a million years would I have expected such a heart-wrenching end to such an eternal love saga of such two mentally-stable people.
Been sarcastic really is like been happy because aguy you hate had cancer
support to be supported life is circle
i dont wanna get into any of this but you better then that mk cheers amr
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
I agree, say nothing rather than something sarcastic. It doesn't do any favours!
Posted by mlebev (Member # 13788) on :
so sorry to hear this it is so upsetting we are all here for u whenever u need to chat thinking of u mh xxx
Posted by Culture Club (Member # 13767) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I tried work guys, I took one step in the door, customers everywhere, they looked up at me and i burst into tears and sank to the floor. Manager picked me up and took me to office. I just cant be around anyone. I thought that going would make me better, it made it worse. People there were so supportive of this whole process, constantly asking of him and how things were going. And its not even being around them, i cant be around any person, not people i know, not ones i dont know. My children are the only ones i can stand being around. I made my family leave me, i dont answer calls. I just cant. I cant go there or anywhere and pretend that I am ok
I didn't recognize that my tear run down on my cheek when I read your post. I can understand your feeling now... oh.. i suggest you to cry anytime you can, and yes don't pretend to be happy. Everyone needs time for healing.
Are the men take their decisions on the feeling or a lot of thinking? I cannot understand why your husband took decision at the time he would have his interview? did anyone influence him? Sometimes men hide their real reasons behind the reasons they told you.
If you both love each other, why don't you both TRY HARD to work on that? TRY HARD and not just surrender with the circumstances and obtacles, cause you are NOT the victim of circumstances.
In my opinion, if you think he is the love of your life, fight to get him back.
Isn't love is higher than any obstacles?
Good luck for you and we all here are your friends and ready to give you impulses, support and pray. Once again good luck!
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Unfortunately the reason is not something either of us can fight against. Its not a fight i can win, and if he fought against it he would never forgive himself. We love eachother yes, but i cant ask him to go against it, and he simply cant. I am afraid that neither of us will have much happiness. Thank you for the support, I have thought and thought of ways around this problem but there just isnt a solution. Best wishes to all, including the ones that are so happy over this..
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Oh gosh.... MH who would have thought?! I am so sorry what happened. I didn't really understand why he gave up on you and on the marriage but I guess he has personal problems to deal with himself. I just wish he would have told you earlier - even when you went to visit him not long time ago.
MH, you got my e-mail address, please if you wanna talk I am there for you. All the best and hopefully you'll get over this traumatic time very quickly.
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Unfortunately the reason is not something either of us can fight against. Its not a fight i can win, and if he fought against it he would never forgive himself. We love eachother yes, but i cant ask him to go against it, and he simply cant. I am afraid that neither of us will have much happiness. Thank you for the support, I have thought and thought of ways around this problem but there just isnt a solution. Best wishes to all, including the ones that are so happy over this..
Everyone's been there, it's alright.
Just try to keep busy & focus on yourself like others said. All the best MH.
Posted by imagine (Member # 11591) on :
Oh mysticheart i am so sorry... I hope that you reach out to your friend online and IRL. Friends and family will always be the ones to pick you up when you fall, and you will come to find that their support and love is much greater than you could ever imagine. Please dont shut people out, it will only make things worse. I wish you all the best
Posted by miffmiss (Member # 14978) on :
I am so sorry to hear about you heart break. My world once crumbled around me. I locked the door and hid in my room for a weekend not speaking to anyone. In short my babys father brought another woman into my home and i found them together. If i thought that was bad i then found out he had not being paying the mortgage and we were going to lose the house. I know its a different situation but i felt i had lost everything all at once. My grandfather came to me and said 2 sayings that have always stuck with me. Get up put your face on a show the world your strong. If the outside is good the inside will heal and the other was yesterdays bread is old and gone, tomorrows bread hasnt been baked yet. Its todays bread that matters. Take everyday one at a time.
You have your friends and your family. Dont be afraid to lean on them. I hope you get through this ok. Vicci x
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
Mystic, I cant say anything everyone else hasnt said..so sorry you are having to go through this, time DOES heal. Posted by tootsie (Member # 13946) on :
Mystic- My thoughts are with you. We are here if you need to talk . Who knows what the future holds. I know it does not seem like it now- but it could be the best thing for you in the long run.
Posted by DawnBev (Member # 11276) on :
MH - sorry to hear you're going through this- its truly a horrid feeling and experience, but time does heal - and you will be stronger, eventually, it doesnt feel like it now, but take one day at a time
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Time does heal.
I am not so sure about it but perhaps it's because people deal differently with certain situations.
Posted by Exiled (Member # 14410) on :
These things happen mystic and while you are purposely ambiguous with the reasons dictating the circumstances of your situation, you and he were simply not meant to be if such a relationship deteriorated in a definite sense and overnight. And a 1-year marriage is overnight as far as I am concerned. You are better off because that is no life to live regardless of the factors that lead to his/your conclusion. If I were to take an intelligent guess then I would assume that the process of being together decided your fate but seriously marriage is predestined and foreordained by Allah (swt). So what I am saying here is that it was simply not meant to be but you are young and pretty so chin up.
Ever heard the classic rock 'n roll song 'here i go again, all alone on my own"? by whitesnake well this one is dedicate to you I mean spring is a week or two away - cheer up - there are many guys out there Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
What a DICK.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: What a DICK.
ROFL
That about sums up most of our thoughts. Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: What a DICK.
wow i am with you but at the same time mystic is hurting right now do we want to do this ********* yep he is a dick and you need to move on . we are all here for you girl Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
yup total knobjockey!!
Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
Sorry there Mickey.. but even if this dude were from Chicago, a bad breakup is the right time to call him like he is. He hurt her, and WORSE than that he allowed her to create a reality that included him. Dick move. WORSE is that he was capable of this the entire time and didn't let on that he was a DICK. Now this poor girl has got to come up with a way to explain to EVERYONE in her world why dude isn't going to be nesting in with her and romancing her across the midwest. She is a single Mom and those especially get "handled with care" because that is SUCH A BEAST of a job, and you don't get to string along single moms and then fake a pass to the left to get out of your promises when its GO time. She wears freaking hijab already.. and DUDE IS A DICK for mucking about in her mind and her emotions. I'll show her my support, by breaking both his knees. You go ahead and make her another cup of tea. All ways lead to healing.
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: Sorry there Mickey.. but even if this dude were from Chicago, a bad breakup is the right time to call him like he is. He hurt her, and WORSE than that he allowed her to create a reality that included him. Dick move. WORSE is that he was capable of this the entire time and didn't let on that he was a DICK. Now this poor girl has got to come up with a way to explain to EVERYONE in her world why dude isn't going to be nesting in with her and romancing her across the midwest. She is a single Mom and those especially get "handled with care" because that is SUCH A BEAST of a job, and you don't get to string along single moms and then fake a pass to the left to get out of your promises when its GO time. She wears freaking hijab already.. and DUDE IS A DICK for mucking about in her mind and her emotions. I'll show her my support, by breaking both his knees. You go ahead and make her another cup of tea. All ways lead to healing.
thats ok i am with you all the way in this one Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
Well im so proud of mystic heart for come ing here and telling her heart breaking story. she is a credit to all of us, Wht i cant understand is that this girl is the most loving , kind hearted person that you can meet. She will help anyone at anytime, before helping herself. I tell you know, hes a fool, cause shes great and any man would be a king to have her as his wife. Im sorry that she is in true pain now, I wish there was a solution, i hope her to have so much love in this world. I wish you so much love, and happiness in the future. I know time will take forever right now. And i know you think it wont go away the pain, but in time i hope you see the light.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Well forgiveness is not something i can give to him for bringing things this far. For knowing from the start that I told him if he cant or wont be with me here not to even start things with me. I wear hijab cause it is my choice, and if i ever go out of the house again that continues, my reversion wasnt for him. I really do not know what to think or do. I do know he has condemned me to life alone by walking away. Where i live there are no muslim men, no single ones at all, the women often talk of the fact there is no one to marry, unless you bring them from outside, and I cant move from this area, kids have to come first and right now, they have both me and their father in their lives pretty much daily cause we live around the same area. I know no one will want to move here to be with me. I cant even think of being with anyone else anyway. Take care all
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
you are in my prayers mh. Posted by CheezyPoof (Member # 8386) on :
Cosmo...you rawk on so many levels.
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: Sorry there Mickey.. but even if this dude were from Chicago, a bad breakup is the right time to call him like he is. He hurt her, and WORSE than that he allowed her to create a reality that included him. Dick move. WORSE is that he was capable of this the entire time and didn't let on that he was a DICK. Now this poor girl has got to come up with a way to explain to EVERYONE in her world why dude isn't going to be nesting in with her and romancing her across the midwest. She is a single Mom and those especially get "handled with care" because that is SUCH A BEAST of a job, and you don't get to string along single moms and then fake a pass to the left to get out of your promises when its GO time. She wears freaking hijab already.. and DUDE IS A DICK for mucking about in her mind and her emotions. I'll show her my support, by breaking both his knees. You go ahead and make her another cup of tea. All ways lead to healing.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Well forgiveness is not something i can give to him for bringing things this far. For knowing from the start that I told him if he cant or wont be with me here not to even start things with me. I wear hijab cause it is my choice, and if i ever go out of the house again that continues, my reversion wasnt for him. I really do not know what to think or do. I do know he has condemned me to life alone by walking away. Where i live there are no muslim men, no single ones at all, the women often talk of the fact there is no one to marry, unless you bring them from outside, and I cant move from this area, kids have to come first and right now, they have both me and their father in their lives pretty much daily cause we live around the same area. I know no one will want to move here to be with me. I cant even think of being with anyone else anyway. Take care all
Tonya, please don't see everything so bleak. You are so wrong. The right man would come and move to where you are. Then again maybe it's time that you look for another spot where you wanna settle down, it's the perfect time to do just that. And maybe you find later on a good Muslim man somewhere in the US and you make things work. You are pretty, smart, a very loving and giving woman any man could only wish for.
But right now please look after yourself. I know you are already a sensible person and such experience might just get you into depression. Just don't let it come to this. Go on a vacation if you can in the next few months, go and visit your friend you haven't seen in ages (I believe she's located in Florida?). Just do something.
It's okay to cry right now, cry as much as you want just don't blame yourself for the way things went. I mean you love this guy with all of your heart, you are so committed, you fly to Egypt over and over again and he decides to end the relationship in the middle of the visa process!! I am not sure if it is much for your comfort but as people say things happen for a reason and obviously your marriage wasn't meant to be.
Remember you are not alone. Talk to us if you need to speak to someone. We are here for you. And no he didn't condemned you to be alone. This marriage most likely has already come to an end, it's the final chapter for the both of you but your life goes on and you have so much to look forward to.
Many many hugs in this difficult time to you. Big
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Well forgiveness is not something i can give to him for bringing things this far. For knowing from the start that I told him if he cant or wont be with me here not to even start things with me. I wear hijab cause it is my choice, and if i ever go out of the house again that continues, my reversion wasnt for him. I really do not know what to think or do. I do know he has condemned me to life alone by walking away. Where i live there are no muslim men, no single ones at all, the women often talk of the fact there is no one to marry, unless you bring them from outside, and I cant move from this area, kids have to come first and right now, they have both me and their father in their lives pretty much daily cause we live around the same area. I know no one will want to move here to be with me. I cant even think of being with anyone else anyway. Take care all
You need a good year to cry, beat up your pillow and cry some more before even thinking of anything other than your children. Maybe this is God's way of granting them special time with you.
I agree that Cosmo's advice totally rocks. He is just one NASTY excuse for a human being as far as I'm concerned. Posted by citizen (Member # 1344) on :
Mystic, I'm really sorry for what's happened, but you seem to be a serial heartbreak victim. It's time to dig out that inner strength and say out loud: 'I DON'T NEED A MAN.' The last thing you need now is another one. You need recovery time. Happiness comes from inside not from being an 'other half' (I hate that expression).
You have so much in life, you're an independent woman, you have a job, home, three children, you have more than the vast majority of women in this world. Be grateful for that, and be grateful you got out of this more or less unscathed, you could have been left with another child.
Listen to "I will survive' and few times, singing along as loud as you can and get back to work. Collapsing on the floor is for Victorian women having the vapours, not for 21st century Western women.
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
mysticheart, I'm sorry that you are going through this. I think it would be a good idea to see a doctor and get on some antidepressants to help you through.
We don't know the whole story and why he has done this but it sounds to me that he may be feeling the same pain that she is.
Good advice TL.
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
MH i am really sorry for what has happened
I too think that for you to cry, cry and cry again is a good thing, to release your emotions
When terrible, terrible things have happened to me in the past, i keep to repeating to myself " i will get through this" and hopefully you do!
Stay strong, think of yourself and your kiddies
I would also like to repeat what Oldbag said - you are brave for sharing your story.
(((hugs)))
Posted by civil society (Member # 14880) on :
i am so sorry.
separating yourself from society only serves to make things worse. keeping busy is the key.
women tend to wallow in their sadness and depression. if it's not clinical, get yourself back by occupying your mind.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Problem with that civil society is, that no matter what i was doing, or where i was , for the last year he has been every thought, every breath. Everything i did, going to work, i thought of the fact i was preparing for him to be here, being at home, preparing home to share with him, being with my kids, soon i would be with them and him doing it together.... I have to gather thoughts yes, but i really just dont know where to start, cause now, every thought is, he is gone. He will never be here, never share our home, never share the moments with the kids, its just hard to just ... stop. I want to take a vacation away, time away , take the kids somewhere nice but... when i think of it, i think i cant, as much as i love the kids, i dont want to do these things with out the one i love. I want to share life with him. Eventually perhaps, right now i just cant see it. I guess i have to learn not to love him first
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
What you are feeling right now is natural. Every cell of your body is connected to your husband. Telling you to start a new life tomorrow would be irrational. It's a bit like mourning - you have to go through a 'cleansing' period, no matter how hard it sounds or will be. After a certain time you will see things in their right perspective. And although some wounds might never heal, you WILL be a stronger person because of this experience.
Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
1. Denial: The initial stage: "It can't be happening." 2. Anger: "Why me? It's not fair." 3. Bargaining: "Just let me live to see my children graduate." 4. Depression: "I'm so sad, why bother with anything?" 5. Acceptance: "It's going to be OK."
If you're going through the five stages, hey...at least you're on number 4 and there's a light at the end of the tunnel very very soon! :-)
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
I agree makbeta, what you are feeling right now is natural!
ExptinCAI quote:
If you're going through the five stages, hey...at least you're on number 4 and there's a light at the end of the tunnel very very soon! :-)
That is a great way to see it.
My thoughts are with you MH
Posted by Khadija_Diagne (Member # 10149) on :
quote:Originally posted by citizen: Mystic, I'm really sorry for what's happened, but you seem to be a serial heartbreak victim. It's time to dig out that inner strength and say out loud: 'I DON'T NEED A MAN.' The last thing you need now is another one. You need recovery time. Happiness comes from inside not from being an 'other half' (I hate that expression).
You have so much in life, you're an independent woman, you have a job, home, three children, you have more than the vast majority of women in this world. Be grateful for that, and be grateful you got out of this more or less unscathed, you could have been left with another child.
Listen to "I will survive' and few times, singing along as loud as you can and get back to work. Collapsing on the floor is for Victorian women having the vapours, not for 21st century Western women.
Yeah I was thinking of "I Will Survive" (gloria gannor??)
Posted by Khadija_Diagne (Member # 10149) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Problem with that civil society is, that no matter what i was doing, or where i was , for the last year he has been every thought, every breath. Everything i did, going to work, i thought of the fact i was preparing for him to be here, being at home, preparing home to share with him, being with my kids, soon i would be with them and him doing it together.... I have to gather thoughts yes, but i really just dont know where to start, cause now, every thought is, he is gone. He will never be here, never share our home, never share the moments with the kids, its just hard to just ... stop. I want to take a vacation away, time away , take the kids somewhere nice but... when i think of it, i think i cant, as much as i love the kids, i dont want to do these things with out the one i love. I want to share life with him. Eventually perhaps, right now i just cant see it. I guess i have to learn not to love him first
MH--- dont set yourself up to become a victim. Every step of you life, should not have been around your husband. I understand you were preparing for a life with him, but never ever breathe for him. i know this is all to late to say now. You are so much better than this. One day, this pain will go away, and when you are ready, you will move on from this. Learn from this one, ok Chicka! Continue being the wonderful mother to your children, and the beautiful person you are. Stay faithful, and know that what Allah has for you, it is for you.
And remember--- Every dog has his day! Wait for it!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
MH you sound devastated which is bothersome. You must understand that, while divorce is never fun, in this case it isn't devastating. It is possible to be thankful for small graces, you never lived together and were not as close as you might have been, your children didn't get attached before he decided to leave, he didn't take your money, he didn't use you for visa, etc. There are plenty of things to be devastated over, burns over 90% of your body, finding out one of your children has died or has a terminal illness, finding out a friend has cancer. You must try to keep things in perspective and know that perhaps you are mourning what 'could have been' and not so much what ever 'was'. Best of luck, stay strong. Posted by elizabethN (Member # 14096) on :
believe me god did you a favor. Seriously!
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
You know, Smuckers, anyone who experienced a real heartbreak before knows how it feels. It feels like your life is meaningless at the very moment. You feel unbelievable sad, devastated, hopeless. You feel like you lost everything what meant something to you. You think constantly about your situation, you feel pity for yourself, you might even start to blame yourself.
Of course for an outsider it's easy to say look it's not all that bad, be happy for this and that, what you have. But I certainly can understand what MH is going through right now.
Tonya, just remember you are not alone.
Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
mh listen to the QUEEN song friends will be friends,i did when my husband passed over and over and i knew i was not alone, you are not alone we are all here for you . chin up , a door closes another opens its the way of things. hold your children close , they are your life now. my thoughts are with you manx.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<There are plenty of things to be devastated over, burns over 90% of your body, finding out one of your children has died or has a terminal illness, finding out a friend has cancer.>
...or death of your loved one. Posted by ***** (Member # 14677) on :
MH so sorry to hear try to be strong, no words will ease your pain, take it one day at a time and in time the situation might change, he could have a change of heart
Posted by murray-mint77 (Member # 13080) on :
MH like so many others, i'm here for u x My thoughts are with u and i pray u feel better real soon x
My advice to you Pray and ask Allah to give you the strength to move on and forget what was not yours,the solution will not come overnight, even weeks but in time it will, stay strong x
Keep your faith real strong and Allah will prevail and give you the life you seek eventually just have faith in him and let him guide you.
You need no man, only your faith to make u whole.
I truly believe Things happen for a reason, only Allah knows why, but in the long run your life will become so much better than u ever thought possible. In time you will see this x
JUST STICK WITH IT and look after yourself x Good luck honey x Love and hugs to you xxxx
Posted by Exiled (Member # 14410) on :
Mystic you wrote about your relationship from the get go. I actually cheered for you when many here were mocking you and calling you all sorts of names. Would it be too much to divulge the reason given to you by your soon to be ex-husband. The reason to terminate your marriage?
I can not think of one reason why a man who supposedly loves his wife would do that. I can not think of one, unless he is going to do life in prison. You have been traveling back and forth to see this man and I know traveling all to well and I can confidently say that each trip cost a minimum of $2000 excluding the salary lost from the days you took off from work.
ES is a bizarro world where women pay for everything. You know in Arab countries this is 3ayib.
3ayib 3ayib 3ayib
And not only that it makes everything so much easier for the men and probably lessens the value of the relationship because they take it for granted - you know easy come – easy go. It is not easy to save a few thousand dollars to visit someone. You did all the work, you paid all the money, and you made all the sacrifices. Try to stay away from these kinds of relationships and as a man I am being truthful when I say it is best for you if a man comes to you rather than you flying across the world several times to be with one. There are certainly exceptions but I am talking in general. If this guy made the sacrifices that you made (and leaving your children alone from time to time is a great sacrifice) then he would not have dumped you in this manner. If this man was crazy in love with you as you are with him then he would have not dumped you. Paper love Mystic, don’t cry too much over paper love.
Posted by Shahrazat (Member # 12769) on :
'''.....as a man I am being truthful when I say it is best for you if a man comes to you rather than you flying across the world several times to be with one.....'''
This s right Exiled. If a man is really in love, he knows how to show it and if it s not a real love he doesn't sacrificce anything as he knows it will be finished one day.
I m really sorry for mh as I think she didn't deserve this after spending lots of money and having all her vacations with him in Egypt instead of spending her time with her kids.
But love is blind and she needs some time to heal.
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: Sorry there Mickey.. but even if this dude were from Chicago, a bad breakup is the right time to call him like he is. He hurt her, and WORSE than that he allowed her to create a reality that included him. Dick move. WORSE is that he was capable of this the entire time and didn't let on that he was a DICK. Now this poor girl has got to come up with a way to explain to EVERYONE in her world why dude isn't going to be nesting in with her and romancing her across the midwest. She is a single Mom and those especially get "handled with care" because that is SUCH A BEAST of a job, and you don't get to string along single moms and then fake a pass to the left to get out of your promises when its GO time. She wears freaking hijab already.. and DUDE IS A DICK for mucking about in her mind and her emotions. I'll show her my support, by breaking both his knees. You go ahead and make her another cup of tea. All ways lead to healing.
Quality.
Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
EXpat hitting us with the old Kubler-Ross scale of grief? BRILLIANT
Smucks and Exiled make too many good points to recap, and all I can add is this;
Life goes on. "Today you may not be what you want to be, or dream of becoming, but the one key to achieving your dream is determining not to quit".
And personally, I married myself a FOB Egyptian and the "reality" of living in the US and the social and familial expectations OVERWHELM what the average Egyptian man is used to doing in Misr. Himself lost his everloving mind for 2 years TWO YEARS! Everything from infidelity, to drug use, to arrest, to car accident, to extreme irresponsibility financially. I expected him to "get it together" much sooner than he was capable of doing. (AND Mine had lived in the US without me for 2 years before we married!)Now that isn't the norm for everyone.. and maybe your dude was "America Ready". But the level of patience and @sskicking it took to put my guy in the right frame of mind for a successful relationship was excruciating.
Did he even have a plan for how to make a living here? I bet he is such a pussy that he too has been playing "pretend internet love" and "holiday love" and was in no way prepared to move to the mid-west of America and step-parent your family. When you are mourning, remember you are grieving what "might have been", and not "what was". Because frankly I'd think you would welcome the end to this long distance garbage. And with this closure, you have the opportunity to make new choices. Best of luck to you, and renmember you always, always have choices. Do not sit on webcam and plead with this man to make you whole. in fact, I'd do a little bit of internet fasting, and avoid all contact with e-men completely. If you to talk to him, I dare you to call him a dick and close the chatbox. Men are like drugs, cold turkey works best.
Posted by SherryBlueBerry (Member # 13867) on :
Cosmogirl you couldn't have said it better!
My heart breaks for you MH but in the long run...you will see that it is better this way.
Grieve, shout, holler...do whatever it takes to make you feel better...but remember...the sun will still rise in the East...and set in the West.no matter our feelings.
You will survive dear...you have 3 reasons to do so!
Hugs...
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
In response to Smuckers, honey I know you mean best but My youngest was very attached to him, she had bought this book to teach writing in arabic, not an english word in it, she said momen would teach her when he arrived, she brought that book to me with huge tears in her eyes a couple days ago, said I guess now i will never know what it says.
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
I don't know how old your kids are but just want to say this; Don't involve them too much in this. (They probably have exams before the Easterholidays. They have to focus on school now.) Moreover, they have to feel safe, loved and protected. You have to provide a loving atmosphere at home, no matter how bad you feel yourself. The heartache will pass... I agree with Cosmogirl (although I don't know the expression 'cold turkey works best' ) Avoid chatting for a while, you have to invest time in other things now. Your kids are top priority, always... Posted by PeaceAtLast (Member # 14252) on :
**** him
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Believe me, i tell him often I will not forgive him and if he is lying to me about the reason, then neither I nor Allah will ever forgive him and he will never have peace.
Posted by Kleobatra (Member # 14882) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Believe me, i tell him often I will not forgive him and if he is lying to me about the reason, then neither I nor Allah will ever forgive him and he will never have peace.
Oh no! Don’t do this to yourself. Try to forgive! He’s the one that’s missing out on all the good things, like a wife that really loves him. Anger cost too much energy and doesn’t make anything better. In the end, one way or another, everyone gets what he deserves. So, do yourself a favour and don't spend too much thoughts anymore on this lowlife.
Posted by MK the Most Interlectual (Member # 8356) on :
quote:Originally posted by Express lane Five beers or less:
quote:Originally posted by MK the Most Interlectual: Oh no.
Never in a million years would I have expected such a heart-wrenching end to such an eternal love saga of such two mentally-stable people.
Been sarcastic really is like been happy because aguy you hate had cancer
support to be supported life is circle
i dont wanna get into any of this but you better then that mk cheers amr
You were not there when I was warning that bimbo not to fall for him.
That bozo does what he does on regular basis to get money and hopefully a visa. And when he found out that MizzTick hasn't got much to offer, he broke up.
I am not the slightest bit sorry for her and she does deserve all she gets.
I hate stupid women.
Posted by Kleobatra (Member # 14882) on :
Sorry MK, but I disagree. You don’t have to be stupid to fall into this kind of trap. You wouldn’t believe how many intelligent, grown up, people do anything to maintain the dream that somebody out there loves them. (Well, at least I didn't, untill I saw these thing happen to people I always thought were mentaly sane.)
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
quote:Originally posted by Exiled: Mystic you wrote about your relationship from the get go. I actually cheered for you when many here were mocking you and calling you all sorts of names. Would it be too much to divulge the reason given to you by your soon to be ex-husband. The reason to terminate your marriage?
I can not think of one reason why a man who supposedly loves his wife would do that. I can not think of one, unless he is going to do life in prison. You have been traveling back and forth to see this man and I know traveling all to well and I can confidently say that each trip cost a minimum of $2000 excluding the salary lost from the days you took off from work.
ES is a bizarro world where women pay for everything. You know in Arab countries this is 3ayib.
3ayib 3ayib 3ayib
And not only that it makes everything so much easier for the men and probably lessens the value of the relationship because they take it for granted - you know easy come – easy go. It is not easy to save a few thousand dollars to visit someone. You did all the work, you paid all the money, and you made all the sacrifices. Try to stay away from these kinds of relationships and as a man I am being truthful when I say it is best for you if a man comes to you rather than you flying across the world several times to be with one. There are certainly exceptions but I am talking in general. If this guy made the sacrifices that you made (and leaving your children alone from time to time is a great sacrifice) then he would not have dumped you in this manner. If this man was crazy in love with you as you are with him then he would have not dumped you. Paper love Mystic, don’t cry too much over paper love.
I agree with this 100% When a man loves a woman nothing stops him from finding ways to make the relationship grow.
Men that accept money from women are seen as 'children' to say the least/not real men! '3ayb' means shame..
Please focus on your children and give them attention and love, it will help you heal! I promise! if they see you are ok they will be ok.
Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
yes huni, time to focus on you and the kids, lets hope soon you will find the strengh to move on and be happy again. You deserve it for sure.
Posted by Dalia* (Member # 10593) on :
I forgot about this post, very sad. Talking about something coming back and biting you in the Ass. Too bad she never listened Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
I love the following saying:
"It will either make you or break you."
Most of us on this Forum have had some tough or even traumatic experiences in life. We could have been warned, could have had some premonitions...but there you go - life. But this is when we really learn. My life hasn't been a bed of roses either, but thanks to that I look at life in a more 'sober' way, so to say.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by MK the Most Interlectual:
quote:Originally posted by Express lane Five beers or less:
quote:Originally posted by MK the Most Interlectual: Oh no.
Never in a million years would I have expected such a heart-wrenching end to such an eternal love saga of such two mentally-stable people.
Been sarcastic really is like been happy because aguy you hate had cancer
support to be supported life is circle
i dont wanna get into any of this but you better then that mk cheers amr
You were not there when I was warning that bimbo not to fall for him.
That bozo does what he does on regular basis to get money and hopefully a visa. And when he found out that MizzTick hasn't got much to offer, he broke up.
I am not the slightest bit sorry for her and she does deserve all she gets.
I hate stupid women.
Ok, i will stand by for alot but i will make something clear. As bad as he has done to me, he did not take money from me, refused to let me pay for anything and in fact sent me money to help me pay for my bills. He did not look for the visa because fact is, he went to the interview, he told them that he didnt want it that he wasnt leaving egypt, they told him was he sure because they were prepared to give him the visa and he refused it. If he had wanted the visa he would have taken it, came then dumped me. That is not the case at all.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
MH, please don't justify yourself to an individual who calls you a *bimbo* - especially in a time where you are faced with such a hardship.
But you do, you try to explain and in a well manner. You are surely a classy lady all the way long.
Thinking of you.
Posted by elizabethN (Member # 14096) on :
so what was the reason for what he did? It has to be either he is married which my husband suspected when he met him or he has a child.
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
My dear Mystic!!!
After having been absent for a long time, on looking in here, I see these dreadful news... I am so very sorry to hear this, especially how you are suffering and sad now... How are you REALLY doing???? Deep inside??? And what are your thoughts / plans on dealing with this all, on how to put it behind you in the most constructive/ helpful for you way???
I herewith repeat some letters I wrote to you a year ago, when all of this was beginning (and sooo many people gave you kind and good advice out of CONCERN for you) -
the REASON I am repeating them is because right now, after what was predicted all along has happened, I think we are back to the CORE PROBLEM - WHICH, MY DEAR, IS SOMETHING INSIDE YOU!!!!! and that STILL needs sorting out, for YOUR own good...
So that a) you should never feel tempted to make such a rushed, dreamy decision again leaving yourself wiiiiiiiide open to future hurt, and b) so that NOW you can really deal with this, see it for what it was, put the blame where it lies and GET OVER THOSE 'LOVE' FEELINGS...
Note: Whatever the reason HE gives, whyever he is NOW unable to join you after all and does not want to continue with the marriage, is utterly irrelevant for proceedings. What is NOT irrelevant, however - this leading us to the core problem again - is that you still think you love him, hence are heartbroken and sad, you still 'understand' and you still make excuses for him... HOW ABOUT FINALLY LEARNING TO UNDERSTAND YOURSELF?????
How about you get real mad and angry, dear Mystic??? 'Understanding' of his (supposed) situation is neither here nor there, he LET YOU DOWN, very badly, and apparently quite unexpectedly, too, contrary to all things discussed previously.. If you only could get angry - instead of 'understanding' whatever foolishness he may be telling you, because, I am real sorry, it HAS TO BE foolishness, one does not marry for life and make plans to move elsewhere to so suddenly call it all off IF ONE WAS SERIOUS IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!! - it would be a great, so healthy step forward for you...
Last point of great concern, which makes me butt in here again - sweetie, I see with really the very greatest of alarm that you are talking about men - and how and where to meet them, shortage of Muslim men around you - AGAIN!!!!!!!!
Dear lost Mystic, please, please, please re-read my advice to you from before... I HOPE you can hear it this time round, may be even give it some thought and consideration, rather than feeling as hopeless as you did at least once before already ...
And IF you want to discuss it, talk about it, perhaps even let me help - as much as I can from afar over the net, bearing in mind that this would be NO substitute for real professional on-the-spot help - I'm here, okay... Do contact me privately, I promise I shall do my best - and I hope you NOW are able to see that everything I ever said to you was out of concern and well-meaning and perhaps not all that silly, either...
Much, much love to you, I wish you ever so much strength, INSIGHT and wisdom - DO THE RIGHT THING NOW, MYSTIC, TIME TO TURN YOUR LIFE AROUND ONCE AND FOR ALL!!!!
You are in my thoughts, look after YOURSELF, Bubble
It is hard to find the right words here to express what must be said... Or rather, hard to find the right words to get through to you - especially since I am convinced that 'getting through to you' is IMPOSSIBLE, sadly... Due to your oh-so-hopeful, non-realistic state of mind, which you are not going to shed until you get serious, professional help.. (This suggestion is meant very seriously, and nicely, it would be the BEST thing you ever did for yourself, I am saying this out of CONCERN for you, even though you will be unable to hear this, too...).
Look at you right now - you are not worried one little bit that your 'love' is not all you made him in your mind, and what you so WANT him to be, no, you are only deadly worried now that 'mean people' are going to 'forward things to embassies'and thus 'destroy his life'?!?!?! What crap - such an act would not destroy his life (provided anyone really were bothered to do so), what it MIGHT do is put a spanner in the works of your happy-happy dream...
Which dream has been worked out in all it's details (in your mind), all the way to the move to Egypt from the US in 11 years, when your youngest is 18... ALL this without one day of actually living together normal day-to-day life, in fact, without even knowing each other in person, what's worse, with someone whom you have been talking to only since September - with a break in December, during which time HE chatted up others, and YOU contemplated the merits of an old lover - and then you proclaim your interest, HE, waiting for this sooooo badly, only looking elsewhere while he thought he lost you, jumped with joy that his true love returned, and hey presto!!!on 8 Feb you two decide to marry...
I would like to say to you READ the above sequence of events to see how very crazy this all is, but unfortunately you will not be able to see that...
Presumably you now feel that it is you and him against the whole, bad, wicked world, deep, deep romanticism, ca?? What could be a greater proof of love than you sticking by him against all nasty, jealous people, professing your undying love, SHOWING everyone how wrong they are...
And naturally, in your condition, all queries and red flags are only to convince you MORE how very deeply romantic and wonderful this is, how worthwhile fighting for it...
Dear Mystic, I said the other day that for a whole multitude of reasons you should not enter into ANY relationship - let alone one like this!!!!! - for your own good.... MAIN reason being that currently (and probably for some time, due to your past) you do not live in reality, but a dream world.
A dream world where it is ESSENTIAL that you are married, this equalling (in your mind) validation as a lovable, adorable princess for the knight in shining armour, and after this, all will be roses forever more and they will live happily ever after in all eternity... The kind of stuff that soppy novels are made of, NOT real and normal life, no matter how much a couple love each other!!!
The actual MAN is not important to you - hence it is so easy to go from one to the other to the next, every time a problem occurs that does not fit into your dream scenario (all planned 11 years down the road already) you switch back to another one and ponder all over again, all of this turmoil in an incredibly short time span - THAT ALONE should show you that it is not THE MAN who is of the essence here, it is THE DREAM - MARRIAGE!!!!
Since you married so very young and had babies while yourself still one, this turning into an unpleasant, abusive relationship, too, you will now feel that life has not fulfilled it's promises and you are owed and DUE some own happiness now, kids will cope... This feeling of having given for so long, and now being entitled yourself, is very understandable and normal - but with you this wish has turned into desperation!!!! Desperation which makes you contemplate suicide (very worrying, pleeeeeeease get urgent help!!!), sit alone in your room crying (but your children don't notice, yeah, right... Mum's mood has NOOOO effect on them, they are happy bunnies...)AND which makes you the easiest prey for anyone out there...
But desperation and a wonderful DREAM are not good starting points for choosing a worthwhile partner for real life - but then again, he does not have to be worthwile, it just has to be a HUSBAND (knight in shining armour, off to fight the dragons..).
Dear Mystic, you have suffered a lot in your life and there has been far too much abuse - others in a similiar situation spent a long time in therapy coming to terms with this, and growing from it, to make their lives stable and HAPPY - YOU have firmly settled in your dream world, and I fear you will stay there until next time all comes crashing down around you and you will suffer AGAIN... (At which point there will be a mixture of two thoughts in your mind - a) you do not deserve better, everyone always told you so when you were young and treated badly; and b) NOW the ones who abused you and made you suffer before can feel REALLY bad, cause look what they made you into, hope they feel guilty now!!!! And no, sadly they won't, only YOU will feel the pain...).
Well, you and your children, who for a start will collapse in shock and feel very betrayed, ignored and shunted aside when Mum returns from holiday announcing she married a total stranger... (But THIS you know, which is why you are not telling them).
Dear, dear Mystic, I am truly sorry to hear about your life and all the suffering - but you MUST realise that only YOU can change this for the better, not through The Dream, but through GETTING HELP!!! NOW!!!! HOW could you have any relationship, even with the greatest man in the world, when you carry all this deep-seated pain and damage??? The VERY BEST THING you can do is to get immediate professional help (nothing wrong with that, in fact, a very brave step!!) to deal with all of that and HEAL - so you are ready and open one day for a new love, if you want one..
NO marriage at this moment will magically solve all problems and make the pain go, it will all be there UNTIL YOU CONFRONT IT!!!! So do not ADD untold future problems and misery to your life now, because that's what any new relationship, let alone marriage, would be..
And to Momen - whatever your motivations and intentions are, do not believe for a second that YOU will just get what you want and come out of this unscathed!!! You, too, will suffer seriously in this - but then, seems to be worth it for you, any reasonable, truly loving man would see this lady needs help of a different kind first, not YOU adding to the upheaval and misery that is her life..... As it is, prepare to REALLY battle things you never thought possible, a good time will NOT be had here by anyone...
Mystic, I wish you well - even if you will not be able to hear me now, all the more you need good wishes... Greetings and best wishes, Bubble
No, I don't know Mystic at all, only her writings here (which I soooooooo wish she would print out and show to a psycologist... All explained in one session, help can commence...). BUT I know and have professionally encountered others like her, and so can see the problem... The tragedy, of course, is that Mystic is far too deep into this dream and loss of reality, she TRULY believes she is on the right track to make all things great.. And therefore WON'T be able to hear any of us here, no matter what we say...
Dear Mystic, quite honestly, if I were near you I would TAKE you to a clinic for your sake and that of your kids, too - to first force you to look at all these issues, if after that, you still feel like doing this (but you won't), then that would be a different and more rational thing.. Right now it is anything but rational, and sadly Mystic will not be ABLE to see that...
Which makes it all the worse then if other foolhardy, well-meaning ladies - yes, I mean YOU, Rose - encourage her in this... Rose, can YOU not see that Mystic is acting purely out of pain and fear, NOT LOVE???????? (Even if it were love, not one serious thought behind this, umpteen chances for this to develop into disaster..). If you really WERE her friend, you'd encourage her to get help so she'll be okay soon!!!!!!!! And THEN she can marry whoever..
To all kind ladies here - Mystic CANNOT listen to all our advice for reasons above... There is a tiny, tiny chance that she MAY at least think about getting the help she should have - really, after all you've been through, Mystic, you are entitled to that and really ought to do it..
However, any and all talk about Momen will - in her condition - convince her MORE that this love is pure and needs fighting for.. Because it gives her a chance to write more crap like 'For you, my love, don't worry, you have explained all' which makes HER feel wonderful, sooooooooo loving, so romantic, soooo 'us against the world' - wrong approach!!!
She also will not stop writing here and/or elsewhere about it all, she NEEDS to see her own professions of love in writing (makes it more real in an unreal world) in order to prolong / deepen this love of loves........ Remember, it is not happening for real, so this is the only substitute, a way to keep dreaming... Probably a good thing, too, rather write only than DOING crazy things..
Again, Mystic - please please go and see someone now, today, BEFORE you go to Egypt... You won't regret it, promise you!!!
All the best, Bubble
posted 15 February, 2007 10:02 AM ________________________________________ Thank you all, dear Laura, MK and DawnBev...
Whhooohooo, I am a NICE person!!! Hooray!!! Thank you... Actually not so much, and definitely not all the time - however, I DO have training as a counsellor (like a therapist / problem solver) and when a person is just SCREAMING in pain (as is happening here in sad, depressed post after post) I can see it, is all.. As many of YOU have seen, too, and so tried to address it, unfortunately all in vain so far....
Where you, dear MK, are definitely RIGHT though, is that my posts to Mystic here are absolutely sincere and straight from the heart - NOT because I want to spoil things for you, Mystic, not because I am a cynic, or jealous, but because it SO UPSETS me to see you in such horrible pain (thinking about suicide, for goodness sake!!! And the next day you are FINE and a wedding will solve all??? PLEASE realise this is NOT normal behaviour and get thee to a therapist, you will be applauded by so many for taking that courageous step!!!).
I wondered whether I should even waste my time in writing this advice, since I greatly fear it will do no good, but in the end thought it must be worth one last try... Because - there is nothing wrong with you, Mystic, you have just suffered on your own for too long and now are sadly misguided, that's all..
But due to all my experience, dear Mystic, I am CERTAIN that if you continue with this plan, very, very soon after ALL problems you have will be far, far worse plus some new heavy ones added now... NO MAN is going to live up to your impossible, pie-in-the-sky expectations, simply because no man can make all good that has gone before!! It would be wrong to expect that of him, whoever he may be, too - your chosen one is not responsible for your baggage, neither could he do anything about your demons...
I suspect you shall answer me that you have no such expectations - wrong, you doooo, and the mere fact that you are hitching ALL on this 'I MUST have a 'loving' husband, nownownow even if he just pretends and I do not know him, who cares who he really is, I need loooove' is ample proof of that attitude - those expectations of yours especially under the circumstances now are BOUND to be disappointed and since this is your 'last chance' (in your eyes only) this will UTTERLY CRUSH YOU -
so much so that you will really be totally irrational and seriously suicidial, and attempt it again. Which would be very terrible and a sad waste, because you CAN have a nice future if you go about it the right way, AND it would be the most dreadful and selfish thing to do to your children!!!
So don't let it come to this - and it WILL, if you persist with THE DREAM - cool it for now, take your time first, GET HELP ASAP, cancel the trip for now, and don't think of knights and love (in the wrong place..), think of and work on yourself for starters.... It WILL make you feel better, good and actually strong, stable, content and not needy - wouldn't that be nice now, Mystic??? No longer pleading and begging for crumbs of affection from whoever happens to come along, no longer being dependent on someone else's 'loooove' or moods, no longer having to pretend all kinds to oneself...
Think about it, dear Mystic, wouldn't THAT be a great thing to strive for??? And after you've done all that, then you marry - only that your choice by then will be a good one, instead of driven by desperation, pain and longing only...
Well, that's more than enough from me now... So I am bowing out here, but I shall STILL think of you and wish you TRUE happiness (without this man for now) for many days...
TAKE CARE OF YOU - YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO.... Love, Bubble
Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
Bubbles... Are you seriously taking this opportunity to pat YOURSELF on the back?
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
geez people does "i told you so" make you feel THAT much better about yourselves even when saying it is actually kicking someone when they're down?????? Unbelievable!!! Now I remember why I left in the first place!! I totally thought this site had improved but when a person who is super sensitive like mystic is at her worst you all (well not all but the ones I thought were getting better) circle around waiting for their chance to kick her until she's practically dead!
Let the poor woman heal for God's sakes and if you don't have anything to say that will be soothing to her in the next few weeks perhaps hold back a bit!
Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
I personally think that if you get sound advice from people and you don't follow it, then they turn out right, you should just go. Not come back whining to them.
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
No, ladies, you have misunderstood totally... I am very sorry if it should come across as you, dear Cosmo, understood it!!!
And, Doodle, by no means is that supposed to be a 'kicking' post - what do you think I am??? - but rather a 'take the initiative, get mad, sort out life' post...
I was showing these letters to Mystic again, because a) I really am DEEPLY CONCERNED about you, sweet Mystic - I do NOT want you to go there, to that point, again (you know what I mean, it was truly worrying enough already before) - as I was worried about you last year. THEN you did not hear me, did not feel that my waffling on about something other than the man did at all apply, but perhaps now on re-reading it, you can see it better???? -
and b) what can be done now, how best to get through and over this, how to feel better soon, will all depend on how the core problem is dealt with - this core problem is what I went on about till blue in the face last year, and it remains the same... And so NEEDS FACING AND OVERCOMING so that same behaviour leading to all kinds is not repeated forever...
Dear Doodle, you say 'Let the poor woman heal' - well, EXACTLY!!!!!! But all healing will happen much faster and be REAL only if one knows oneself, and manages to throw overboard one's baggage...
I am terribly sorry that for whatever reasons (which I do not want to know, irrelevant anyhow) this has happened and you are so hurting now - alas, I remain convinced that this is the tip of the iceberg, there is far more to it than that, the REAL thing to be tackled is something else - I sooooooo wish for you to feel better and really be able to turn life around and first and foremost put this sad, tragic experience behind you now, I hate to think of you completely sad and unable to think of / do something else - but that's why THAT must be sorted, it would speed up the healing process NOW and make things better allround FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE...
Again, if I can help - I really am frightened that you might get toooo down again, though you sound like you are holding up bravely right now - please let me.... OFF this board, bad enough I had to put the reminders of 'core problem' here, I did this IN THE HOPE that this time you do hear me - trust me, I would be far, far happier if all was well for you, Mystic!!!!
I do hope that you understand my motivation as it was meant - and also know that the offer is sincere...
Thinking of you, wishing you lots of strength again, mch love, Bubble
Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
i think the point people are trying to make isn't "i told you so" but rather...you didn't want to hear it back then....would you PLEASE now reconsider and seek professional help?
because mystic, you seriously NEED to speak to a professional.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Betty, the only person my husband is married to is me. And no he doesnt have a child. Nice try.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Exiled: Mystic you wrote about your relationship from the get go. I actually cheered for you when many here were mocking you and calling you all sorts of names. Would it be too much to divulge the reason given to you by your soon to be ex-husband. The reason to terminate your marriage?
I can not think of one reason why a man who supposedly loves his wife would do that. I can not think of one, unless he is going to do life in prison. You have been traveling back and forth to see this man and I know traveling all to well and I can confidently say that each trip cost a minimum of $2000 excluding the salary lost from the days you took off from work.
ES is a bizarro world where women pay for everything. You know in Arab countries this is 3ayib.
3ayib 3ayib 3ayib
And not only that it makes everything so much easier for the men and probably lessens the value of the relationship because they take it for granted - you know easy come – easy go. It is not easy to save a few thousand dollars to visit someone. You did all the work, you paid all the money, and you made all the sacrifices. Try to stay away from these kinds of relationships and as a man I am being truthful when I say it is best for you if a man comes to you rather than you flying across the world several times to be with one. There are certainly exceptions but I am talking in general. If this guy made the sacrifices that you made (and leaving your children alone from time to time is a great sacrifice) then he would not have dumped you in this manner. If this man was crazy in love with you as you are with him then he would have not dumped you. Paper love Mystic, don’t cry too much over paper love.
WOW I'm impressed, great post! Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: In response to Smuckers, honey I know you mean best but My youngest was very attached to him, she had bought this book to teach writing in arabic, not an english word in it, she said momen would teach her when he arrived, she brought that book to me with huge tears in her eyes a couple days ago, said I guess now i will never know what it says.
Hindsight is always 20/20, I would personally never have involved my kids with a man when the deal wasn't for sure that he would live there.
What happens if he was turned down for the visa and couldn't end up coming? She would be in the same situation...and for what? Perhaps without meaning to you have taught her that marriage is not so important, since it comes and goes so easily with the people closest to her.
This young daughter is learning from you, watching how you plan and talk about things that aren't set in stone yet and then watch you have to be depressed when it crumbles. I know you don't mean that to happen but with each decision you have to ask 'how will this affect my child'...never ask children to deal with grown-up responsibilities....she pinned her future, the same as you, on this man she never met. Bad example. But live and learn and I agree with Cosmogirl, I would put away the internet for a long time, it sounds like you've had your fair share of heartbreaks, time to get back to what counts. Best of luck. Posted by CheezyPoof (Member # 8386) on :
I completely agree with Smuckers. I rarely discussed my husband to my children prior to his arrival. I didn't want to get their hopes up just in case it didn't happen. Prior to his visa being granted I went about my life as if he wasn't coming. I didn't want to get my hopes too far up either. I didn't change my name, I didn't rearrange my life...none of that. When his visa was in his passport I sat down with my boys and discussed his upcoming arrival. Why drag innocent children into something that may or may not be? It's really unfair to them. Now you have a mess to clean up, MH. Not only a mess for yourself, but a mess for your children. I don't mean to sound like I'm giving you a hard time but it's really something you should've considered.
I hope you all can heal from this soon. Like Smuckers said, you live and learn. Please keep this HUGE lesson learned in mind next time you look for a mate. And please for the love of everything sacred on God's green Earth...stay away from Egyptians!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: In response to Smuckers, honey I know you mean best but My youngest was very attached to him, she had bought this book to teach writing in arabic, not an english word in it, she said momen would teach her when he arrived, she brought that book to me with huge tears in her eyes a couple days ago, said I guess now i will never know what it says.
Hindsight is always 20/20, I would personally never have involved my kids with a man when the deal wasn't for sure that he would live there.
What happens if he was turned down for the visa and couldn't end up coming? Same situation, she would be in the same situation...
This young daughter is learning from you, watching how plan and talk about things that aren't set in stone yet and then watch you have to be depressed when it crumbles. I know you don't mean that to happen but with each decision you have to ask 'how will this affect my child'...never ask children to deal with grown-up responsibilities....she pinned her future, the same as you, on this man she never met. Bad example. But live and learn and I agree with Cosmogirl, I would put away the internet for a long time, it sounds like you've had your fair share of heartbreaks, time to get back to what counts. Best of luck.
Posted by *Souri* (Member # 9095) on :
I hope you all can heal from this soon. Like Smuckers said, you live and learn. Please keep this HUGE lesson learned in mind next time you look for a mate. And please for the love of everything sacred on God's green Earth...stay away from Egyptians!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think that is a bit too much . She was warned before not to fall for this guy but she did not listen. I also disliked her attitude especially when she received those " warnings signs" from others members and did not listen nobody is perfect She obviously made a mistake and hope that she will learn from it. Her story can be helpful to many others women who are about to make the same mistake, so don't be too cruel with her, and those nasty comments are not really necessary, those words can sometimes lead a fragile person doing terrible things !!! you never know
Hope you'll get better soon mysticheart
Posted by CheezyPoof (Member # 8386) on :
I wasn't trying to be nasty. Looking at her track record with the Egyptians I concluded that she doesn't have much luck with them.
You're right, nobody's perfect. But damn...after the 2nd Egyptian it was prolly time to look elsewhere.
I really wish MH the best.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I must agree with Cheezy, if my own husband broke my heart and left me to wallow you should be damned sure that I would not be anxious to meet another Egyptian man anytime soon. Not to take it out on Egyptian men, but honestly...I would want to take a year (or more!) to heal, think about what is most important in life, get my self esteem back and move on and watch my children grow and mature. If anything MH could use this as a great example for her children, how to dust yourself off and pick yourself up when things get bad, a sort of survivor-mentality. This only works if you don't keep making the same mistake, though. Remember, children watch & see EVERYTHING! Except when you ask them to do something~ Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Girls, seriously, it's a bitter thing what MH goes through right now. I am sure there is more to the breakup she might not want to tell and I don't think Momen is gonna join this conversation to clear things up.
MH is going through a traumatic time right now and she needs support so stop critizing and attacking her.
Seriously we should all be thankful that her husband broke up with her now, I am sure something bothered him immense with the relationship otherwise he would have taken the visa to join her and live together as a family in the US. This was a one lifetime opportunity to go to the States - if he was just a visa seeker - and I am sure he was very well aware of this fact. I am also sure that the embassy clerk was in disbelief that someone would deny to receive the visa; I don't think that happens very often.
Again MH is going now through a divorce, don't step on her but be with her. I am sure most of you have been at least once through a painful break-up in life. Give her a rest. She shared her life crisis with us ..... she needs your support.
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Dear Mystic!!
Hope you are doing okay… Main and – hopefully - most beneficial reason for you to re-read my letters – if you agree that my assumptions are correct, ie. that it is THE IDEA and THE DREAM which so attracted you, which you were/ are so longing for, and which made you act, then that actually bodes well for the future…
AND it also means that you do not have to be sad any more. Neither ideas nor daydreaming are reality, right?? Remember, you are mourning a wish, something THAT HAS NOT EVEN TAKEN PLACE YET!!!!!!!! (Aside from a very short time actually together, MOST of it was not real yet..). Do you see this?? You are mourning THE FUTURE, or rather, your dream of it.. (That’s all it was, so let it go…. No need to despair for this…). And hey, the future is in YOUR hands, so let’s tackle it!!!
And now that the dream is over, time to get with reality again and make it GOOD. Now, how to create the right foundations for the dream to become reality after all, one fine day – do try and consider this a chance. A great chance FOR YOU, to take CONTROL, to really once and for all TURN THINGS AROUND, to take time for yourself and demand that help you ought to have been given long before!!! DOOOOooo get rid off everything that is making you stand in your own way, sort this all out – you owe it to your kids, but most of all TO YOURSELF!!! – heal, feel good, strong and at peace in yourself – AND THEN… WHEN you are truly ready for someone else, right now you ought to get to know YOURSELF – and, see above, if NOW is not the time, when is???
This IS a chance to make everything better long-term – take it, please!!!
And DO try and get out of the house today, even half an hour!!! Go for a walk with the kids, let them talk if you must… But DO SOMETHING!!! Don’t give in to this, okay…
Big hugs, be better, Bubble
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by Tigerlily: Seriously we should all be thankful that her husband broke up with her now, I am sure something bothered him immense with the relationship otherwise he would have taken the visa to join her and live together as a family in the US.
That's what I was thinking. Be it an integrity issue of this man, indecision or any other reason he had in mind, better now than much later - would be even harder for all concerned.
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Totally agree, dear Schmuckers... ( Hope you are doing good, hi!!).
quote:If anything MH could use this as a great example for her children, how to dust yourself off and pick yourself up when things get bad, a sort of survivor-mentality. This only works if you don't keep making the same mistake, though. Remember, children watch & see EVERYTHING! Except when you ask them to do something~
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Ahhh! The Schmuckers name, love it! I'm doing well Bubblygirl, thanks, hope you are well, too.
TL, I know you mean well and I do agree with you in part, which is why I (personally) haven't gone all 9/11 on MH with what has happened. I don't believe in kicking someone when they're down. I am mostly just concerned for the children...I think it is best that MH does learn from this and I'm sure she will. On that note, I think when she went into this relationship there were FAR TOO MANY standing idly by encouraging her in a relationship that looked pretty murky to begin with...and now look where she is. I hardly think doing the same thing again, especially when a newbie could be reading is worth the risk.
I think MH posted what happened here to warn others and to hopefully reach out a little. She's a bigger person than I am, I would have stuck my head in the sand and remained hidden, I applaud her for having the courage...big hugs MH. Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Well said smuckers Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
tigerlilly, you're thinking like a normal, rational person. do you post your personal problems on the internet? do you fall in love and want to or do marry people you hardly know from half way around the world? repeatedly. you don't.
i know you're trying to help but mystic needs professional help. coming on here when things go wrong to get *internet support* is a symptom of the same problem as when she came on here when she fell in love, when the world was against them, etc.
it's a sickness, and as much as people have been trying to reach out to her for over a year - CLEARLY, a professional is needed for the sake of her health.
If any of you are really her friends, GET HER AN APPOINTMENT with a qualified counselor, for the love of god.
Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: TL, I know you mean well and I do agree with you in part, which is why I (personally) haven't gone all 9/11 on MH with what has happened. I don't believe in kicking someone when they're down. I am mostly just concerned for the children...I think it is best that MH does learn from this and I'm sure she will. On that note, I think when she went into this relationship there were FAR TOO MANY standing idly by encouraging her in a relationship that looked pretty murky to begin with...and now look where she is. I hardly think doing the same thing again, especially when a newbie could be reading is worth the risk.
I think MH posted what happened here to warn others and to hopefully reach out a little. She's a bigger person than I am, I would have stuck my head in the sand and remained hidden, I applaud her for having the courage...big hugs MH.
I agree with the first part about not kicking someone when they're down and I feel the devestation being experienced by MH.
I disagree that she posted here to warn others. Rather she is so depressed she doesn't know where else to turn for sympathey and support.
MH,
I've been devestated before and I have to agree with Bubbles about getting professional help. Only a true professional can help you discover why it is you continue to go down this path of choosing the wrong guys. Medication will also do wonders in assisting in your recovery to where you will at least get out into life again. This is not good that you do not want to leave the house or go to work. Your children are going to be affected by all of this and it's going to affect them as adults regardless of what you think right now. Children are smarter than we give them credit for. I should know. . .my mother suffered from extreme depression and it affected me as a child. I now understand later in life that none of it was my fault but her behavior affected the way I viewed life and myself.
I also know that in my darkness moments I prayed with an open heart and He heard me. I received answers almost immediately to let me know I was going to be ok. No matter what higher power we believe in (Allah, God) we have to keep our beliefs that they will hear our cries. They just need us to open our hearts completely to let them in.
With faith and professional help, you can end up a stronger person in the end. You are better off without this loser.
I have one question. . .how does anyone know that this guy actually went for an interview with anyone and didn't just make it up to make MH think he was "trying"? My gut tells me he made it all up. No way is someone going to go through the trouble of showing up for a visa and then tell the clerk he doesn't want it. There's more to this story than he wants to even admit to MH.
Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI: tigerlilly, you're thinking like a normal, rational person. do you post your personal problems on the internet? do you fall in love and want to or do marry people you hardly know from half way around the world? repeatedly. you don't.
i know you're trying to help but mystic needs professional help. coming on here when things go wrong to get *internet support* is a symptom of the same problem as when she came on here when she fell in love, when the world was against them, etc.
it's a sickness, and as much as people have been trying to reach out to her for over a year - CLEARLY, a professional is needed for the sake of her health.
If any of you are really her friends, GET HER AN APPOINTMENT with a qualified counselor, for the love of god.
Agree. Her friends should be very concerned about her lack of wanting to even leave the house and collapsing on the job because she is so distraught.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
If the one common denominator in this and the past failed relationships is YOU then obviously there is a problem. Perhaps professional help is the best thing and I don't mean that as an insult...most of us could benefit from time to time. But to try to figure out why you keep attracting men who end up the same way or how you keep finding yourself in failed relationships or abusive situations is the best thing you could do for both yourself and especially your children. If anything, do it for the chidren. Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
It always takes two to tango...
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
...only if both people know how to dance. Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
otherwise you end up with bruises.
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: If the one common denominator in this and the past failed relationships is YOU then obviously there is a problem. Perhaps professional help is the best thing and I don't mean that as an insult...most of us could benefit from time to time. But to try to figure out why you keep attracting men who end up the same way or how you keep finding yourself in failed relationships or abusive situations is the best thing you could do for both yourself and especially your children. If anything, do it for the chidren.
Repetitive failures in relationships are usually due to a lack of self confidence from the 'victim' who in general, falls easily in the trap of abusive people.
Learning how to appreciate one's self to gain a higher self esteem, usually helps when entering a new relationship.
Specific techniques on how to change old behaviors are extremely helpful. It takes a strong will, and most importantly an admission that there is an internal problem.
Mystic, if you wish to discuss this further, PM me.
In the meantime, please look at your children, and think how lucky you are to have them.
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by Almaz.:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: If the one common denominator in this and the past failed relationships is YOU then obviously there is a problem. Perhaps professional help is the best thing and I don't mean that as an insult...most of us could benefit from time to time. But to try to figure out why you keep attracting men who end up the same way or how you keep finding yourself in failed relationships or abusive situations is the best thing you could do for both yourself and especially your children. If anything, do it for the chidren.
Repetitive failures in relationships are usually due to a lack of self confidence from the 'victim' who in general, falls easily in the trap of abusive people.
Learning how to appreciate one's self to gain a higher self esteem, usually helps when entering a new relationship.
Specific techniques on how to change old behaviors are extremely helpful. It takes a strong will, and most importantly an admission that there is an internal problem.
Mystic, if you wish to discuss this further, PM me.
In the meantime, please look at your children, and think how lucky you are to have them.
I think that's exactly what it is. And it might often stem from childhood (though not always) - feeling inadequate, having dominant parents...
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
bonzo quoted:- No way is someone going to go through the trouble of showing up for a visa and then tell the clerk he doesn't want it. There's more to this story than he wants to even admit to MH
I must i did think the same thing, or maybe he was turned down but didn't have the heart to tell you MH. Please listen to the advice given in good faith MH.
Take care of yourself and your little ones
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bonzo: I have one question. . .how does anyone know that this guy actually went for an interview with anyone and didn't just make it up to make MH think he was "trying"? My gut tells me he made it all up. No way is someone going to go through the trouble of showing up for a visa and then tell the clerk he doesn't want it. There's more to this story than he wants to even admit to MH.
Or he *is* getting it and isn't going to tell her. Unless she writes the embassy she will never know for sure. It is quite possible for him to get it and come here and just not tell her unless she has it set up that the embassy is to notify her when he gets the visa. Something to watch out for but she knows that. Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
You all really wanna know the reason, MOM! Moms health isnt so good and when faced with actually leaving her and the possibility that she die while he is away just ate at him. He simply can not leave his mom and have a chance that she die while he isnt there. That is that. She wants him in egypt with her and wants him in egypt for good and that is that. I lose out, again, to mom. I love the woman dearly, she loved me as well, just simple she doesnt want him leaving, though she didnt force it, he cant let her down and leave her
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote: originally posted by bonzo: I also know that in my darkness moments I prayed with an open heart and He heard me. I received answers almost immediately to let me know I was going to be ok. No matter what higher power we believe in (Allah, God) we have to keep our beliefs that they will hear our cries. They just need us to open our hearts completely to let them in.
I agree with this, and what many others have said here too but this stood out to ME.
Mystic, you converted to Islam and I hope sincerely it was for YOU and not FOR this man. Whether knowing him was what led you to Islam is irrelevant as long as you chose it for YOU.
Someone once told me when I converted that when you know Allah/God in your heart then there is really no NEED for a man, it was good advice.
Whatever his reasons I also agree this is better NOW than later. I know your every waking moment would have been filled with thoughts of him, in every situation you thought of him being there with you. Even shoping in the supermarket you would have thought of him being there with you. It was a daydream that you lived for a time and now its time to get on with real life with your kids.
We are all different and we react to things differently. There are many many great advices on here from different people and Mystic you should read them all and take from them what you can, even the ones that seem to say 'we told you so' as they are all out of concern for you and your welbeing.
I fully agree you need professional help. Dont take that in a bad way from anyone as its not meant that way. This has devastated you to a point the bottom has been blown out of your world, you can get help to put it back again and YOU can do it without a man, without THIS man. You are a super sensitive person Mystic, thats not a bad thing generally but it is when you are 'accepting' too much shite. I agree with whoever said get angry, you need to, then you will move on.
The reason he has given he would have known long ago, when this started, he should not have left it till now, the last minute, to tell you this. This is a good warning to many others here with the dream of having your man with you in your country, not all will leave Egypt no matter how much they say they want to, the family 'pull' is strong, much stronger than it is in the 'west'. MUM is always number one.
In your last post you say you lose out again, I dont agree. You have won more than you can see right now. Maybe you wont see it for years but this has happened for a reason. Sometimes we dont know or understand why God gives us these trials but there is always a good reason, He has better plans for you somewhere.
Go to your doctor and get some help and take 2 weeks to wallow, get signed off work for 2 weeks. feel sorry for yourself, get angry, cry, kick the doors, go out and throw sticks for your dogs, and stop 'accepting' shite. You are worth much more than this, more than he can give you. you need to KNOW this, you need to FEEL this, you need to DEMAND this. He lost, you won.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: You all really wanna know the reason, MOM! Moms health isnt so good and when faced with actually leaving her and the possibility that she die while he is away just ate at him. He simply can not leave his mom and have a chance that she die while he isnt there. That is that. She wants him in egypt with her and wants him in egypt for good and that is that. I lose out, again, to mom. I love the woman dearly, she loved me as well, just simple she doesnt want him leaving, though she didnt force it, he cant let her down and leave her
But, Tonya, why didn't you mention this from the beginning? Look I haven't sad anything bad about your husband although I didn't understand why would he put you through all this, that all this love he had for you seemed to be so suddenly over.
You have people assuming here things, ripping your husband apart, how many of them told you in the last 48 hours to seek psychological advise, they talked about 'abusive' relationship and all this crap?
Tonya, seriously I was so happy for you when I heard you found someone who you love and he loves you back and you are gonna get married again. That's all what you wanted - to have a steady man in your life again and be a completed family, right?
Please do yourself a favor and don't fall in love with someone so far away. Look in your own vicinity once you are ready. The boyfriend you had before you took also trips to Egypt and you wouldn't see each other for months. And he couldn't even commit to marry you after several years. Wasn't it the same situation that your boyfriend could not relocate because of his parents? Now you found someone, married this person but it turns out he will not join you.
Wasn't this issue clearly discussed before that Momen is gonna leave his mother and Egypt once he receives the visa? Doesn't he have any other family members who can take care of Mom? Is there no alternative???
For some reason I don't think we get the whole picture and that is fine as it should have been a private matter between the both of you from the beginning.
Now you need to accept his decision although it's so hurtful. Please move on from this heartbreak. And as someone else said what can't break you can only make you stronger. You are in my thoughts. Take good care of yourself.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: You all really wanna know the reason, MOM! Moms health isnt so good and when faced with actually leaving her and the possibility that she die while he is away just ate at him. He simply can not leave his mom and have a chance that she die while he isnt there. That is that. She wants him in egypt with her and wants him in egypt for good and that is that. I lose out, again, to mom. I love the woman dearly, she loved me as well, just simple she doesnt want him leaving, though she didnt force it, he cant let her down and leave her
I'm sorry to hear about his mother, but that hardly makes makes sense. If you are a married couple you work though the rough times and push past difficulties in life. Jumping ship because of a sick mother is hardly logical - especially if you have both made a commitment to each other. Can't things be put on hold for a while giving him time to care for her? Unless that isn't really the reason and he's using it an an excuse to cushion the blow to you. ? If you feel you 'lose out' to the mother, something is wrong in that. I would be suspicious, but that's just me. Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: You all really wanna know the reason, MOM! Moms health isnt so good and when faced with actually leaving her and the possibility that she die while he is away just ate at him. He simply can not leave his mom and have a chance that she die while he isnt there. That is that. She wants him in egypt with her and wants him in egypt for good and that is that. I lose out, again, to mom. I love the woman dearly, she loved me as well, just simple she doesnt want him leaving, though she didnt force it, he cant let her down and leave her
Mmhmmm
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
Good post/advice Ayisha.
mysticheart, I can understand his feeling the need to stay with his mom. When my mother was sick I spent every moment possible with her. To say he should of thought of this before is a bit harsh. We all would of, could of, should of done things differently at some point in our life.
Why not move to be with him during this time? He is your husband. Why do you expect him to make all of the sacrifices? This is just one moment in your life. Moments pass and things change, then life proceeds to the next moment.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I think the issue is her children cannot leave with her, they are far too young. I just can't see why they can't just wait, what's the rush to be together? If your husband's mother gets sick and could be dying you hardly divorce over it....I just don't understand seeing marriage as so throw-away. You work through it, you get past it, it's called commitment. Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
Well, people carry their young children all over the world. Children adapt, especially if they are loved. It would be an adventure for them. They can experience another culture. Sometimes we are only looking at one option and think all others are impossible. Then as time moves on we see how we could of done things differently.
I agree with you Smuckers. I don't think marriage is disposable, especially if you love each other. It is so difficult to find someone you truly love. There has to be other options than to end the marriage because his mother is sick.
I also know how it feels to have a sick mother. It's like time stops and the most important thing is to be with her.
Mistic is lucky to have a husband who cares for his mother. How could you respect a man who did other wise? I do not believe that means he doesn't love her. I think that if he left his mom and she dies while he is gone it could hurt the marriage.
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: You work through it, you get past it, it's called commitment.
This is sadly a word that is lacking in a lot of marriages these days, both in the West and also in the East.
In the West it's common because people want to be "happy" and if their partner doesn't fulfil them and give them what they want/need, then it's off to find the next one who can.
In the East, it happens very often with women who don't have families that will put pressure on the man to fulfil his commitment to the woman or with those woman who don't tie them down with a large deferred mahr (dowry) that will make them think twice about leaving when the first test comes to their marriage. It's an easy come, easy go attitude that is sadly very common.
Ok, if you get a good one, then these things won't make any difference, they will find a way to work out the problems in the marriage and will stick at it and work hard at it. But if you get one that turns out to be average or less after the initial "honeymoon" period has passed, then these things can make the man try a bit harder to work out a solution, and may even make a man out of some of them. There are some that should be let go anyway, but with a bit of encouragement some men can turn out to be decent if they are made to take more responsibility.
Don't forget that most Egyptian men have been pampered by their mothers (and sometimes their sisters too) and when they get married it may be the first time that they have ever had to take any real responsibility for anyone, including themselves.
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: Well, people carry their young children all over the world. Children adapt, especially if they are loved. It would be an adventure for them. They can experience another culture.
Bringing foreign children to Egypt isn't an easy option as they can't enter the public school system for free and good private education is very expensive.
In this case there are also the father's rights; a mother cannot just walk out with her children without his permission and she cannot leave them behind to go and live with a man in a foreign country...especially one who seems to think that marriage is so disposable.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold:
Mistic is lucky to have a husband who cares for his mother.
She doesn't anymore, that is the point. I would love to have a husband who would care for his mother and not chuck me away at the first sign of her demise. I would feel more lucky for that. However, I do hope his mothers health improves, it can't be fun to see your mother die - but it is, again, no reason for divorce.
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: She doesn't anymore, that is the point.
Actually, Smuckers, technically she does still have a husband. If he has declared Talaq (divorce), she will now be in her Iddah (waiting period) and is still his wife for the next three months. During this time, he can revoke the divorce. So if he can find a solution during this time, the marriage can continue. This is the whole purpose of the Iddah period, to save marriages from being ended hastily and giving time for problems to cool down so solutions can be sought.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Ah good point Newcomer - part of me hopes they can reconcile, the other part isn't so sure. That would be far too much for the children to take, this on again off again faux step-father they've never met that they are devestated over his not coming...the entire thing just boggles the mind. Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Hi, dear Mystic!!
Here's hoping that today will be a little better for you... But, vain hope, sadly, it is apparent that you have not taken one step forward in your recovery yet...
Why do I say that?? Because as yet you have not commented with one word on WHAT you are going to do, on what you plan for now, what your ideas are to cope with this disaster, on how to put it behind you...
The ONLY thing you tell us is HIS excuse - irrelevant, anyhow - fact still is, he LET YOU DOWN SUDDENLY!!!!! and so HURT YOU BADLY!!!! BUT - you are DISCUSSING this with HIM - WHYYYYYYY do you still talk / chat / view webcam with him???? What for??? Since he is not coming, and asks for the marriage to be over, WHY should you PROLONG all heartache through having contact still??? How will you possibly be able to put this behind you, if lovey-dovey assurances (more from your side, HE is not coming, right..) are still flying back and forth??
Look, whatever the reasons he gives now, and whatever one makes of them (and here a little aside to Of-Gold, aside from the fact that HE has apparently not asked for Mystic to move over - thank God!!! - or he did (knowing she can't, so that's playing), she can't, only in 10 years' time, when the youngest is 18...) - the fact remains that IT IS OVER. Sorry to put it down like this, but this is how it is - and that is the FIRST THING you must come to accept in order to heal.
(Which is why I say 'irrelevant' to reason. Never mind that. END RESULT is important, it's over...).
There is NO POINT, and it will be sooooooo bad for you, if you keep on hoping, if you think that may be this will change, something may happen - hard as it is for you right now, STOP LOVING!!!! (Loving WHAT, anyhow??? A man you do not know terribly well, who strung you along for a year and who now CRUSHED YOU??? Get the hell MAD at him!!!!). And then STOP all contact with him!!!
You MUST, you cannot possibly feel better and learn to think of life without him again, if he is still constantly there, intruding in your REAL life...
Dear Mystic, the only way forward is for you to make a conscious, real effort to NOT think about him, talk about him (definitely not TO HIM!!), dream of 'what could have been' - just decide every day that you set times aside to FORGET. To suddenly never think of him is impossible, but try some small amounts of time for starters. Do something completely different, force yourself to preoccupy your head with anything else - do the crosswords (anything that requires concentration is excellent for switching off temporarily), do go for a walk with the kids, help with their homework, let them talk to you if you can't think of something other to talk about...
Remember that there is faaaar more to life than this man - always has been, but now he does NOT feature anymore, HE decided that... The sooner you will ACCEPT this decision, the sooner you will be able to think of what is really the ONLY IMPORTANT THING HERE - YOOOUUUU AND YOUR KIDS!!!!
So, acceptance, grief, and then down to the nitty-gritty - how can you ensure that the future will indeed be better??? Sweet Mystic, I am getting the impression that you feel I am trying to tell you something is wrong with you, you are crazy or so - NOT SO!!!!! You are not crazy or have bad faults, you have just had a hell of a lot to deal with FOR TOO LONG, is all. And you did this on your own... Which is the hard, slow, and sometimes impossible way to go.
Now, KNOWING how very beneficial and positively life-changing therapy can be, how much it can help, and how it can pull one out of a rut and a PATTERN ONE REPEATS INVOLUNTARILY, I have to tell you again that I consider therapy NOW as a truly life-changing opportunity for you. It would be very brave and courageous of you to start this (cause it is scary at first), but you will FEEL the good of it real soon... AND it would set a wonderful example for your kids, on how to NOT simply let things happen to one, to NOT be at the mercy of someone else / events, but how to TAKE CONTROL AND RESPONSIBILITY!!
Please write and tell us what you are doing today to get your mind of him for a bit - one small thing will do, just do it!! And let us know, I am ready to cheer for you... You CAN do it!!!
Now go and cut some flowers, hug the kids, and feel better today... Much love to you, Bubble
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
It's a difficult call, I agree, but basically, they are still married and she cannot even consider thinking about anyone else until it is totally over and they haven't managed to work out a way to reconcile.
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bubblesperson: Hi, dear Mystic!!
Here's hoping that today will be a little better for you... But, vain hope, sadly, it is apparent that you have not taken one step forward in your recovery yet...
Why do I say that?? Because as yet you have not commented with one word on WHAT you are going to do, on what you plan for now, what your ideas are to cope with this disaster, on how to put it behind you...
The ONLY thing you tell us is HIS excuse - irrelevant, anyhow - fact still is, he LET YOU DOWN SUDDENLY!!!!! and so HURT YOU BADLY!!!! BUT - you are DISCUSSING this with HIM - WHYYYYYYY do you still talk / chat / view webcam with him???? What for??? Since he is not coming, and asks for the marriage to be over, WHY should you PROLONG all heartache through having contact still??? How will you possibly be able to put this behind you, if lovey-dovey assurances (more from your side, HE is not coming, right..) are still flying back and forth??
Look, whatever the reasons he gives now, and whatever one makes of them (and here a little aside to Of-Gold, aside from the fact that HE has apparently not asked for Mystic to move over - thank God!!! - or he did (knowing she can't, so that's playing), she can't, only in 10 years' time, when the youngest is 18...) - the fact remains that IT IS OVER. Sorry to put it down like this, but this is how it is - and that is the FIRST THING you must come to accept in order to heal.
(Which is why I say 'irrelevant' to reason. Never mind that. END RESULT is important, it's over...).
There is NO POINT, and it will be sooooooo bad for you, if you keep on hoping, if you think that may be this will change, something may happen - hard as it is for you right now, STOP LOVING!!!! (Loving WHAT, anyhow??? A man you do not know terribly well, who strung you along for a year and who now CRUSHED YOU??? Get the hell MAD at him!!!!). And then STOP all contact with him!!!
You MUST, you cannot possibly feel better and learn to think of life without him again, if he is still constantly there, intruding in your REAL life...
Dear Mystic, the only way forward is for you to make a conscious, real effort to NOT think about him, talk about him (definitely not TO HIM!!), dream of 'what could have been' - just decide every day that you set times aside to FORGET. To suddenly never think of him is impossible, but try some small amounts of time for starters. Do something completely different, force yourself to preoccupy your head with anything else - do the crosswords (anything that requires concentration is excellent for switching off temporarily), do go for a walk with the kids, help with their homework, let them talk to you if you can't think of something other to talk about...
Remember that there is faaaar more to life than this man - always has been, but now he does NOT feature anymore, HE decided that... The sooner you will ACCEPT this decision, the sooner you will be able to think of what is really the ONLY IMPORTANT THING HERE - YOOOUUUU AND YOUR KIDS!!!!
So, acceptance, grief, and then down to the nitty-gritty - how can you ensure that the future will indeed be better??? Sweet Mystic, I am getting the impression that you feel I am trying to tell you something is wrong with you, you are crazy or so - NOT SO!!!!! You are not crazy or have bad faults, you have just had a hell of a lot to deal with FOR TOO LONG, is all. And you did this on your own... Which is the hard, slow, and sometimes impossible way to go.
Now, KNOWING how very beneficial and positively life-changing therapy can be, how much it can help, and how it can pull one out of a rut and a PATTERN ONE REPEATS INVOLUNTARILY, I have to tell you again that I consider therapy NOW as a truly life-changing opportunity for you. It would be very brave and courageous of you to start this (cause it is scary at first), but you will FEEL the good of it real soon... AND it would set a wonderful example for your kids, on how to NOT simply let things happen to one, to NOT be at the mercy of someone else / events, but how to TAKE CONTROL AND RESPONSIBILITY!!
Please write and tell us what you are doing today to get your mind of him for a bit - one small thing will do, just do it!! And let us know, I am ready to cheer for you... You CAN do it!!!
Now go and cut some flowers, hug the kids, and feel better today... Much love to you, Bubble
very nice bubbles i wish you well also MH Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bubblesperson: The ONLY thing you tell us is HIS excuse - irrelevant, anyhow - fact still is, he LET YOU DOWN SUDDENLY!!!!! and so HURT YOU BADLY!!!! BUT - you are DISCUSSING this with HIM - WHYYYYYYY do you still talk / chat / view webcam with him???? What for??? Since he is not coming, and asks for the marriage to be over, WHY should you PROLONG all heartache through having contact still???
Hi Bubbles, just wanted to comment, as a Muslim wife, she is still married to her husband for 3 months after the declaration of divorce, and Islamically, there is still hope for a reconciliation during this time.
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Aaargh, ye Gods, dear people!!! Iddah-smiddah, is what I say to that... 3 months to find a solution?!?!?!!?! He had a year to plan for his aging mother and END MARRIAGE is all he came up with!!!!
Do you want poor Mystic to hope against hope that it will get magical suddenly after all??? This will only deepen and prolong all depreession by a few months...
Mystic, if HE is too much of a spineless coward to make the final cut, YOU DO IT!!! This is the rest of your life at stake here...
Love to all, Bubble
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
She cannot change what she cannot acknowledge.
I agree with Bubbles. Reconciliation is possible theoretically but logically not. He met her, romanced her quickly - she came and married him, he was not hesitant about that. He chooses to dump her and divorce so quickly, even turning his back on the dear children who grew to love him and hope for him? I think anyone who encouraged this poor girl to marry this man should step up and tell her to divorce him ASAP, get some therapy, go on a vacation WITH HER CHILDREN and stop looking for a man, at least for a LONG LONG WHILE. Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
I didn't say that I was hoping that they should reconcile or that I thought it would be for the best in this particular case, I was just stating a fact.
And whether you like the fact that Allah declared this 3 month waiting period in the Qur'an or not is irrelevant; it is a legal ruling in an Islamic marriage and needs to be taken into consideration when encouraging mystic to do anything.
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
I fully understand the situation with his MOM, but what sprang to my mind straight away is: Why didn't you say it earlier? I just don't get it...
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Dear Newcomer!!!
I did not mean anything against Allah's ruling - though perhaps I sounded disrespectful, sorry, no disrespect to ALLAH meant!!! - neither did I call THAT 'irrelevant', I MEANT that talking of 3 months grace will only lead to our Mystic hanging in there... For what??? A man who so acts on the spur of the moment, more than once, who is one second happy to attach himself 'for life', then to willy-nilly throw it all away, what is to be made of his seriousness and commitment???
It would be more than tragic - and this is all tragic enough already - if you, dear Mystic, were still to think that all will work out WITH HIM and so keep on waiting / hoping/ suffering even longer... What's happening to you is just bad enough, poor thing!!
Concentrate on making life better FOR GOOD - and that DOES mean cutting him out THIS MINUTE!!!! To save what is left of your heart...
(Hope this explains it better, APOLOGIES if I caused offense, dear Newcomer!!).
Love to all, Bubble
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
I admit it did sound offensive and it was me who said that what you or anyone else thought about Iddah was irrelevant, not that you had said that Iddah was.
But basically, whether anybody likes it or not, the situation is that as Muslims, mystic and this man agreed to get married to each other. Allah did permit Muslims to divorce, but He also laid down rules for this procedure, so that people wouldn't take it lightly.
He said that a man could declare a divorce and, if after three months he did not rescind this declaration, the marriage would be over. So, even though he has actually declared the divorce - which at this point we are assuming, but it seems from what mystic says that he has - he can at any time during these 3 months rescind it and mystic will once again be his wife, in the full sense of the word. And she will have no choice in this. So encouraging her to go off and forget about him at this stage could make it more difficult if he changes his mind, which - whether we like it or not, or we think it would be a good idea or not - he legally has the right to do.
This time would be better spent adjusting to the possibility that in three months that she will be a divorcee and free to do as she pleases, not starting to act as a divorcee.
Yes, mystic could divorce him, but she would have to go through the legal process with the courts to do that, and I am not sure whether, once he has declared Talaq, whether she can divorce him at this time or not.
This wasn't a western marriage between two non-Muslims, it was a Muslim marriage, and that should be borne in mind, however well-meaning people want to be.
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: You all really wanna know the reason, MOM! Moms health isnt so good and when faced with actually leaving her and the possibility that she die while he is away just ate at him. He simply can not leave his mom and have a chance that she die while he isnt there. That is that. She wants him in egypt with her and wants him in egypt for good and that is that. I lose out, again, to mom. I love the woman dearly, she loved me as well, just simple she doesnt want him leaving, though she didnt force it, he cant let her down and leave her
What the ƒuck??
These people don't love you, nor do they give a crap about you. 'I have to stay with my mommy'? Are you shitting me??
Most people in the arab world have no concept of love, whether it's altruistic platonic love between close friends or romantic love between a man and a woman.
If his wench of a mother truly "loved" you, if he really "loved" you, then you'd be together without any of this BS.
That is not the case however. Your eagerness to be loved has caused you to abandon your own mores and concepts of love and a relationship, and you adopted theirs, which is the polar opposite of what love/a relationship should be.
It's between a man and a woman, not a man a woman and his fuckin mama, she can ƒuck right off along with everyone else that's in the way. Nothing less is acceptable.
You've given way to much of yourself that's why you feel depleted, and you're still holding on to some twisted concept of love that they convinced you was good enough, even tho deep down you knew it wasn't.
Get yourself back MH, godspeed.
One word:
Tequila.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by VanillaBullshit:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: You all really wanna know the reason, MOM! Moms health isnt so good and when faced with actually leaving her and the possibility that she die while he is away just ate at him. He simply can not leave his mom and have a chance that she die while he isnt there. That is that. She wants him in egypt with her and wants him in egypt for good and that is that. I lose out, again, to mom. I love the woman dearly, she loved me as well, just simple she doesnt want him leaving, though she didnt force it, he cant let her down and leave her
Most people in the arab world have no concept of love, whether it's altruistic platonic love between close friends or romantic love between a man and a woman.
I don't know Vanilla, you seem like quite a loving sort of lad to me. Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
Hush fatso.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by VanillaBullshit: Hush fatso.
ROFL ahhh the love...
I do agree with the part though about 'his mother loved me'. How do you know? Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by VanillaBullshit: Hush fatso.
i love you vb. so discreet Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
Love means having emotional maturity, knowing when to let go, mutual respect - not acting on petty, whimsical bullshit that wastes everybody's time, which is what these folks did, waste MH's time.
He can go back to banging his sick mama til she gets better.
Yes, that was sick & wrong wasn't it? I don't give a ƒuck.
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
we still love you though vb
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
You're the bestest Micky Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
I suppose if the 'sick mama' charade didnt work , her next ploy would be to do the 'holding the breath' one or whatever worked in her tantrum
Welcome to the Egyptian style of emotional blackmail Mystic.
Drop him like a hot potato......
forget this man who 'never ' loved' you in the first place. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
VB that was kinda my point, I mean if she never really got to know the woman well, how does she know that his mom loved her? I agree with you though, IF she really loved her, she would encourage her son to be with his wife and begin their family and not turn his back on her....but sadly I really don't believe that's what any of this is about. I'm quite sure Mr. MH is up to no good. Sadly~
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
That's beacuse "Mr MH" is a straight up bitch.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Can't argue there.
Posted by murray-mint77 (Member # 13080) on :
quote:Originally posted by VanillaBullshit:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: You all really wanna know the reason, MOM! Moms health isnt so good and when faced with actually leaving her and the possibility that she die while he is away just ate at him. He simply can not leave his mom and have a chance that she die while he isnt there. That is that. She wants him in egypt with her and wants him in egypt for good and that is that. I lose out, again, to mom. I love the woman dearly, she loved me as well, just simple she doesnt want him leaving, though she didnt force it, he cant let her down and leave her
What the ƒuck??
These people don't love you, nor do they give a crap about you. 'I have to stay with my mommy'? Are you shitting me??
Most people in the arab world have no concept of love, whether it's altruistic platonic love between close friends or romantic love between a man and a woman.
If his wench of a mother truly "loved" you, if he really "loved" you, then you'd be together without any of this BS.
That is not the case however. Your eagerness to be loved has caused you to abandon your own mores and concepts of love and a relationship, and you adopted theirs, which is the polar opposite of what love/a relationship should be.
It's between a man and a woman, not a man a woman and his fuckin mama, she can ƒuck right off along with everyone else that's in the way. Nothing less is acceptable.
You've given way to much of yourself that's why you feel depleted, and you're still holding on to some twisted concept of love that they convinced you was good enough, even tho deep down you knew it wasn't.
Get yourself back MH, godspeed.
One word:
Tequila.
Sorry MH I have to totally agree with wat VB says above .....
MARRIAGE is only about the husband and wife. giving u such a poor excuse proves his true feelings and intentions SORRY x Don't get me wrong yes a person cares for his/her parents for sure and if that said person's parent is truly sick it is terrible to up and leave them,but wat? just call for divorce now? not work thru it with your partner?? To me thats too strange? But i have learnt alot from others mistakes and have heard this excuse made by so many men( not egyptian either) to their partners 'that their mother is sick/dying and they have to be there for her only...' when truly said mother, lives on for another decade or more!!! Thats not worth divorcing over? its just a sad excuse for quickly breaking up with someone and not stating the obvious real truth. Maybe Momens mother is real sick but in her heart surely she would want her son happy making his own family ???? Definately you do need to see a therapist everyone who goes thru traumatic situations would benefit from that i really hope you do hun x And when you come thru that your life will certainly pick up for the better cos you will be seeing clearly and not allowing your past to dictate to u x
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by VanillaBullshit: Hush fatso.
I love your sunglassed eyes. Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
If the 'mother' story is true, and if in fact she is DYING, it is not unusual for a son that is used to project his own neediness on to his mother, to identify with the mother to whom he has to 'refuse' a request without feeling bad about himself, to the point of destroying his family.
The mother selfishness and control syndrome is not seen as such in countries like Egypt, Italy etc.. but more like a very 'normal' situation.
In MH case, if indeed it is true that he chose his mother over his wife and over a new improved life, this man is not going back to MH, not even when the mother passes.
His decision/reaction shows him as the controlled son.
In circumstances where the son-mother relationship is not based under the control and selfishness of the mother, the son would just have to postpone his trip, explaining the situation to the Embassy, and to the wife, then wait till the mother gets better or passes, continuing the long distance marriage, as it would be more logical than destroying it.
Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
If there was a diagnosis and a prognosis then maybe the story could be believable. As it is there is none. It's non specific. If the mother is saying she will die, then of course that absolves her from the sin of lying because we all die at some point. She is calculating her soul into the equation also.
All areas covered...........
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
quote:Originally posted by harankash: If there was a diagnosis and a prognosis then maybe the story could be believable. As it is there is none. It's non specific. If the mother is saying she will die, then of course that absolves her from the sin of lying because we all die at some point. She is calculating her soul into the equation also.
All areas covered...........
Just saw smuckers' post on the other page; she added a link. MH's husband does'nt seem credible, to say the least.
Hoping MH wakes up, and gets on with her life.
Whether the 'mother' story is true or not, is not relevant anymore, the husband is not reliable and that is a huge weakness in anyone.
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
I agree Almaz, i read the other thread and to put it politely "he doesn't sound to nice" sorry MH but i totally think you had a narrow exscape!
One thing that i find very hard to beleive MH, is that your hubby went TO the embassy and when they went to GIVE him the visa he turned it down! Why, why why would he do that if he had already known he mum was ill?
Sorry MH this story doesn't ring true to me I wish you all the best i really do but please DO NOT waste anymore time on a guy who is either lying through his teeth or at best a gutless wonder.
Sorry don't mean to sound harsh but sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind Posted by BIC RUNGA ROXX (Member # 14666) on :
HOLY GUAQAMOLY... i must say that my curiousity is eating me up to know what kind of execuse he made up to pull out... damn..i hope it isn`t one of those funny stories Egyptians say when they arrive late to work.. ( sorry BOOOSS i had to bring my GRANDMA to the hospital..her water broke one hour before it was time for me to leave to work..!!! ) i would never think of divorcing the wife i love dearly over any reason than her cheating on me for example..or if she asked me for it and insisted...because she hates my gutttts... nothing of these 2 scenarios happened... wtf is his reason...???
look MH love is blind...but with some brains...and the help of your ES friends you can heal...and seek pro help...seriously.. any way...CHITTT did happen...now you should clean up the mess dear.. and start fresh...clean...with different vision about life...
and sorry for all that MH...i guess you are better off this way... you surely don`t need a man now in your life...your kids must come first..pull yourself together for their sake..try to get more power by praying and reading Quraan.. and please don`t think that all Egyptian men are creeps..and follow that warning in your heart ( STAY AWAY FROM EGYPTIAN MEN ) , or that will mean if an American woman had 2 or 3 times bad luck with American men...she must go to another country looking for a man away from USA..coz all American men are bad..!!! very not logical...
i would refrase the warning if you don`t mind.. STAY AWAY FROM BAD EGYPTIAN MEN...!!!
may Allah help you..
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:and please don`t think that all Egyptian men are creeps..and follow that warning in your heart ( STAY AWAY FROM EGYPTIAN MEN ) , or that will mean if an American woman had 2 or 3 times bad luck with American men...she must go to another country looking for a man away from USA..coz all American men are bad..!!! very not logical...
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Personally i think he is a gobshite who used her for the Visa.... Either he accepted it and is not telling her that and is dumping her to start his new life without her!!!!! Or he got refused and is not telling her this and is dumping her to find another Visa bride who he will be succesful with!!!!!! God help the next on because i think he will dump her to when he has got what he wants!!!!! As for the 'sick' mother, all i can say is - how come that always have a sick Mother when they want money, when they need to stay in Egypt or travel home alone. now sick Mother is reason for divorce also?????? I'm sorry Mystic it smells fishier than week old Mackerell... You need to pull yourself up off that floor and say 'this bastard will not beat me!'... He obviously was not the 'one' for you. concentrate on your life and your kids for now... Mr Right is out there somewhere and you will find him when you stop looking, if you go looking for him you will just keep finding Mr Wrong... Time will heal Mystic, but please don't enter into another relationship with a damaged heart it is recipe for disaster, give it time... Best wishes for your future x
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Habeeby: I'm sorry Mystic it smells fishier than week old Mackerell...
ROFL Not much literally makes me laugh, but this did! Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
quote:Originally posted by Habeeby: Mr Right is out there somewhere and you will find him when you stop looking, if you go looking for him you will just keep finding Mr Wrong...
so so true
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
Yes MH, please, no more Guidos.
Posted by foreignluvr (Member # 5854) on :
quote:Originally posted by Habeeby: Personally i think he is a gobshite who used her for the Visa.... Either he accepted it and is not telling her that and is dumping her to start his new life without her!!!!! Or he got refused and is not telling her this and is dumping her to find another Visa bride who he will be succesful with!!!!!! God help the next on because i think he will dump her to when he has got what he wants!!!!! As for the 'sick' mother, all i can say is - how come that always have a sick Mother when they want money, when they need to stay in Egypt or travel home alone. now sick Mother is reason for divorce also?????? I'm sorry Mystic it smells fishier than week old Mackerell... You need to pull yourself up off that floor and say 'this bastard will not beat me!'... He obviously was not the 'one' for you. concentrate on your life and your kids for now... Mr Right is out there somewhere and you will find him when you stop looking, if you go looking for him you will just keep finding Mr Wrong... Time will heal Mystic, but please don't enter into another relationship with a damaged heart it is recipe for disaster, give it time... Best wishes for your future x
Habeeby, I don't believe a visa is the case at all. If one recieves a marriage visa in the USA if they come on a K-3 which was Mystic's husbands visa type then upon arrival he must 1st adjust his status which can take up to 9 months. Then after two years upon arriving in the USA he would also have had to remove conditions as the marriage visa here is always a conditional visa based upon marriage. So it would not be at all easy for someone to accept a visa and come to the USA w/o the other one knowing. He would have never been allowed to stay that way. Also if for some reason he went to the interview and was given a 221(g) (a form that they want other evidence for the marriage or an intent to deny) the wife is also notified. I have no idea what really happened but I did want to clear up the visa issue as I am sure he did not receive it at his interview. Plus, most all men in Egypt go thru some sort of AP/AR after the interview and this can last months.
Good luck on your upcoming marriage. When is the happy day? Posted by BIC RUNGA ROXX (Member # 14666) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: You all really wanna know the reason, MOM! Moms health isnt so good and when faced with actually leaving her and the possibility that she die while he is away just ate at him. He simply can not leave his mom and have a chance that she die while he isnt there. That is that. She wants him in egypt with her and wants him in egypt for good and that is that. I lose out, again, to mom. I love the woman dearly, she loved me as well, just simple she doesnt want him leaving, though she didnt force it, he cant let her down and leave her
my fear is right then MH...sorry dear..i can tell you frankly this motha fucka is playing you...this story you can hear in any stupid Egyptian movie... don`t shed a tear over this arsshole.. throw him with his memories in the toilet and flush it all away... Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by VanillaBullshit:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: You all really wanna know the reason, MOM! Moms health isnt so good and when faced with actually leaving her and the possibility that she die while he is away just ate at him. He simply can not leave his mom and have a chance that she die while he isnt there. That is that. She wants him in egypt with her and wants him in egypt for good and that is that. I lose out, again, to mom. I love the woman dearly, she loved me as well, just simple she doesnt want him leaving, though she didnt force it, he cant let her down and leave her
What the ƒuck??
These people don't love you, nor do they give a crap about you. 'I have to stay with my mommy'? Are you shitting me??
Most people in the arab world have no concept of love, whether it's altruistic platonic love between close friends or romantic love between a man and a woman.
If his wench of a mother truly "loved" you, if he really "loved" you, then you'd be together without any of this BS.
That is not the case however. Your eagerness to be loved has caused you to abandon your own mores and concepts of love and a relationship, and you adopted theirs, which is the polar opposite of what love/a relationship should be.
It's between a man and a woman, not a man a woman and his fuckin mama, she can ƒuck right off along with everyone else that's in the way. Nothing less is acceptable.
You've given way to much of yourself that's why you feel depleted, and you're still holding on to some twisted concept of love that they convinced you was good enough, even tho deep down you knew it wasn't.
Get yourself back MH, godspeed.
One word:
Tequila.
VB you have such a soothing way with words ever thought of being a shrink yourself?
Posted by BIC RUNGA ROXX (Member # 14666) on :
i am sure he didn`t refuse to go to the interview and gave the Visa away... maybe he found another better chance with another visa bride...more younger..or with more money...or with no kids on her tail... what a jerk..!!!
Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
This guy should have thought about his mom before marrying MH. He moved way too fast and played on MH while she was still recovering from another depression. I don't believe the interview story nor the part about his mom's health not being "so good". What does *that* mean? My mom's health isn't "so good" either but I live in Europe and she's in the states. That doesn't make me an uncaring daughter. Just one who is living her ADULT life but still there if her mom ever needs her.
I looked at that thread Momen posted on about China. It reeks of "PLAYER" all over. If you look at his profile and things he posted, he certainly wasn't concerned about leaving his mom to move to CHINA.
Besides, what's up with this yahoo.co.uk account? When you get a yahoo acct in Egypt, do they give you one in the UK? Just curious.
I noticed he changed his pictures on his website, too. Funny. . .none have MH in them. Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by BIC RUNGA ROXX: i am sure he didn`t refuse to go to the interview and gave the Visa away... maybe he found another better chance with another visa bride...more younger..or with more money...or with no kids on her tail... what a jerk..!!!
Exactly! Agree 100%
Posted by BIC RUNGA ROXX (Member # 14666) on :
quote:Originally posted by VanillaBullshit:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: You all really wanna know the reason, MOM! Moms health isnt so good and when faced with actually leaving her and the possibility that she die while he is away just ate at him. He simply can not leave his mom and have a chance that she die while he isnt there. That is that. She wants him in egypt with her and wants him in egypt for good and that is that. I lose out, again, to mom. I love the woman dearly, she loved me as well, just simple she doesnt want him leaving, though she didnt force it, he cant let her down and leave her
What the ƒuck??
These people don't love you, nor do they give a crap about you. 'I have to stay with my mommy'? Are you shitting me??
Most people in the arab world have no concept of love, whether it's altruistic platonic love between close friends or romantic love between a man and a woman.
If his wench of a mother truly "loved" you, if he really "loved" you, then you'd be together without any of this BS.
That is not the case however. Your eagerness to be loved has caused you to abandon your own mores and concepts of love and a relationship, and you adopted theirs, which is the polar opposite of what love/a relationship should be.
It's between a man and a woman, not a man a woman and his fuckin mama, she can ƒuck right off along with everyone else that's in the way. Nothing less is acceptable.
You've given way to much of yourself that's why you feel depleted, and you're still holding on to some twisted concept of love that they convinced you was good enough, even tho deep down you knew it wasn't.
Get yourself back MH, godspeed.
One word:
Tequila.
VB...!! I totally agree with you on all that except asking a Muslim woman of healing using Tequila.. even if it is a joke...i think not propper.. sorry...had to say it..
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Dear All!!
By now Mystic must be regretting that she told us his given reason... What with speculation going wild now... Still, I agree, sounds totally like one of those stories, pretty weak one at that - BUT STILL, whatever, if this is true or not, whatever his real reasons are, it still comes down to one thing only - HE WANTS A DIVORCE!!!!
Again, that is the only thing of relevance here, and the only one for you to deal with, Mystic... My suggestions on that you already know... Best wishes for it...
But, one thing that came to mind now since Newcomer mentioned the type of marriage - thanks for sorting that so kindly with me, dear Newcomer!!! - you did not only marry Islamically, but internationally, too????? So whooooooooooo is paying for this divorce??? (It had better be HIM, else very soon now I shall feel inclined to send some heavies round... That would just be the pits if he will let YOU pay for this, too!!!).
Can an Egyptian divorce certificate be just translated and legalised and then the divorce is valid there (USA), too, or will this require a whole court thing in the States??? Hopefully not... Please somebody know??
Now, what are you doing today, dear Mystic?? Take care of you, BE STRONG, stay off the Net...
Much love, Bubble
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bonzo: This guy should have thought about his mom before marrying MH. He moved way too fast and played on MH while she was still recovering from another depression. I don't believe the interview story nor the part about his mom's health not being "so good". What does *that* mean? My mom's health isn't "so good" either but I live in Europe and she's in the states. That doesn't make me an uncaring daughter. Just one who is living her ADULT life but still there if her mom ever needs her.
I looked at that thread Momen posted on about China. It reeks of "PLAYER" all over. If you look at his profile and things he posted, he certainly wasn't concerned about leaving his mom to move to CHINA.
Besides, what's up with this yahoo.co.uk account? When you get a yahoo acct in Egypt, do they give you one in the UK? Just curious.
I noticed he changed his pictures on his website, too. Funny. . .none have MH in them.
Well, I'm in the dark about Momen...Why don't you post the link to his website? What is his name on ES?
If Mystic did start a relationship while depressed, that doesn't sound like a good way to begin. Was Momen the rebound man?
I really don't understand people who fall in love with who ever they meet. It doesn't happen that easily for me. I'm pretty tough on a man though and would never admit to myself much less him if I feel in love with him until there is no way left to deny it. By that time we are both sure.
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Hi Bonzo!!
Wherever you are, you simply open 'yahoo.uk' and open an account, no big deal, always possible..
And foreignluvr - yeah, 9 months etc - but what about arriving and immediately going underground, ie. illegal??? Happens all the time...
Be good, y'all, Bubble
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
why does everyone have to talk about this . she is sad thats all that counts right now , cant we have respect for MH 's feelings and not bout momen's it is MH that came for our support not the scum bags
Posted by DawnBev08 (Member # 14964) on :
true Mickey, but perhaps it might warn others who seem to keep falling for this crap, as I recall she was warned several times by some that knew him on here, but she didnt listen
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by MICKY A: why does everyone have to talk about this . she is sad thats all that counts right now , cant we have respect for MH 's feelings and not bout momen's it is MH that came for our support not the scum bags
Everybody is talking about this MICKY, because mystic decided to announce it to everybody on ES, knowing that many people had advised her against this marriage, and knowing how people on ES react to anything like this.
If she what she wanted was support, she would, like most people do, quietly tell their friends in private, when they are ready to cope with their reactions, she would not have announced it to the world and its neighbour on ES a couple of days after he had told her.
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
well thats her past . she needs our support now, you think Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by MICKY A: well thats her past . she needs our support now, you think
and i agree with you newcomer. it should have been in private . but maybe she thinks we are all her friends Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Hi dear Micki!!
Ey, I AM being nice... Trying hard at least, suggesting little things to get over / cope with heartache... Cause that she is distraught and tooo sad at this moment is clear.. As it was clear that she would go ahead and marry in the first place - however, no blame is due now for this, all part of the prevailing state of mind...
Which state of mind is out of sync, very seriously out, for a while already, right, Mystic - so, FIX IT!!!!! so nothing like this can ever happen again and you'll be so hurt...
Where is your daily report, please??? I still want to cheer..
Big hugs, Bubble
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I posted it because it was going to get out anyway. And I couldnt just keep it inside to sit there, It was my first step to try to get it out and start to heal at all. I should not have put the actual reason he did this, I love his mom dearly, and she should not be put on here. I hesitated for that reason in telling the real reason, and i just snapped when some of the responses suggested some things, i didnt think. She is a wonderful woman.
As for the reasons, I do not know what is true and what isnt. Allah and Momen are the only ones that know this....If what he tells me isnt true then Allah will deal with him and so will his conscience.
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bubblesperson: Hi dear Micki!!
Ey, I AM being nice... Trying hard at least, suggesting little things to get over / cope with heartache... Cause that she is distraught and tooo sad at this moment is clear.. As it was clear that she would go ahead and marry in the first place - however, no blame is due now for this, all part of the prevailing state of mind...
Which state of mind is out of sync, very seriously out, for a while already, right, Mystic - so, FIX IT!!!!! so nothing like this can ever happen again and you'll be so hurt...
Where is your daily report, please??? I still want to cheer..
Big hugs, Bubble
i do agree but i want to let MH know we are here for her Posted by DawnBev08 (Member # 14964) on :
Mickey, you have such a kind heart .............
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
i try i just put myself in her position and see what it feels like. there i don't want to be. thank god i have a genuine man thats loves me for me thats all. i feel for MH so much it hurts, maybe because i knew what he was like from the start and didnt want to say anything Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
MH wouldn't it have been an option for your husband to get the visa, you live in Egyptwith him and then he move to your homeland when his Mam DID die (sorry to sound so calculated and insensitive, but MH's hubby hasnt been exactly fair with her if he has not considered this alternative)
Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Allah and Momen are the only ones that know this....If what he tells me isnt true then Allah will deal with him and so will his conscience.
You are right about that, MH. I am a FIRM believer that what comes around, goes around. I have found taking the high road and moving on with life is the best revenge.
If you either try to seek revenge out of anger or even let him know you are completely a basket case because he left you, he is going to justify in his mind he was right in leaving you. . .but hold your head up, get yourself together, and move on. . .well, it will make him wonder if he made a wrong decision.
I promise you if you get yourself together and take the complete high road, it WILL be the sweetest revenge ever. It's happened each and every time with me & you will see for yourself. Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by MICKY A: well thats her past . she needs our support now, you think
True but support sometimes needs to be a reality check, too. It's sort of like the old saying about how the truth hurts but sometimes you need to hear it in order to heal.
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Okay then foreignluvr if it wasn't for visa i do not know why this asshole has played her but one thing is for sure he has played her like Vanessa Mae plays the violin!!!! All i can say is he should count himself lucky that Mystic is such a nice person cos i would have his nuts on a plate if it was me... Thanks for asking about my wedding, i feel so bad mentioning it on this thread so i will say one word - 7th...
Mystic have you ever tried Thai Boxing? If not i cannot think of a better time for you to take it up... It is great for the body, mind and soul... give it a go when you are feeling a little stronger...
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<If she what she wanted was support, she would, like most people do, quietly tell their friends in private, when they are ready to cope with their reactions, she would not have announced it to the world and its neighbour on ES a couple of days after he had told her.>
Absolutely agree,newcomer. Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
MH WHY DID YOU POST THIS? what were you thinking?????????????
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
MH I feel pretty confident that in your heart you know the reason he gave isn't genuine. With that being said, did you learn from this? If not, it was all in vain.
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
People here always say that people post here when things are going well. The 'BMD' syndrom. It takes a big person to come on and admit it's gone wrong. Pride is a big thing. I think everyone has had their say and it should be left at that. We all deal with things in a different way. That is the way of life.
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
MH WHY DID YOU POST THIS? what were you thinking?????????????
Maybe MH has nobody else to confide in. Judging from her far far earlier post she has not had a good time of it with her realtives; maybe she was looking for the support of her ES family, but did not take into consideration the backlash that has come with it?
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
quote:Originally posted by foreignluvr: Habeeby, I don't believe a visa is the case at all. If one recieves a marriage visa in the USA if they come on a K-3 which was Mystic's husbands visa type then upon arrival he must 1st adjust his status which can take up to 9 months. Then after two years upon arriving in the USA he would also have had to remove conditions as the marriage visa here is always a conditional visa based upon marriage. So it would not be at all easy for someone to accept a visa and come to the USA w/o the other one knowing. He would have never been allowed to stay that way. Also if for some reason he went to the interview and was given a 221(g) (a form that they want other evidence for the marriage or an intent to deny) the wife is also notified. I have no idea what really happened but I did want to clear up the visa issue as I am sure he did not receive it at his interview. Plus, most all men in Egypt go thru some sort of AP/AR after the interview and this can last months.
That's completely inaccurate foreignluvr. When a husband comes in on a K-3 he does not have to do a darn thing for two years. He could easly come in without her knowing it and live here for two years until he has to adjust status. He has two years to adjust his status.
Also, the people who are now interviewing for the most part are not going through the long AP hell that a lot of us went through. My guess is that if he did go through with the interview he would have passed and got the visa in less than a month for many reasons but the biggest being the amount of time she's stayed there each time she visited. A lot depends on who interviewed him also.
In addition, the 221 g does not mean the wife will be notified. For sure she can find out easily if she emails the embassy or calls DOS but if they do not have it set up for her to be the main contact then the only one they will be contacting is him.
Wanted to make all that clear. The system clearly is flawed in this respect.
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
I just want to add that this is why it is IMPERATIVE that she contact both the embassy and DOS and ask what went on and insist that the visa process be cancelled. Otherwise he will get his visa and land in the US under false pretenses.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: People here always say that people post here when things are going well. The 'BMD' syndrom. It takes a big person to come on and admit it's gone wrong. Pride is a big thing. I think everyone has had their say and it should be left at that. We all deal with things in a different way. That is the way of life.
It seems you have not read enough threads here,YAT.I have read more bad than good experiences here,to tell you the truth.I would even say that the opposite holds truth:a good number of those happy unions for years!!!read this well,i said YEARS!!don`t need to come here and waste time and energy since they are enjoying themselves at their fullest. Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
So Doodlebug he could be pulling a fast one? Well i thought so... All those ES members from the US do not be suprised if you bump into this lowlife in the future... Mystic please contact the Embassy and check this out, do not let him have the last laugh...
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
quote:Originally posted by Habeeby: So Doodlebug he could be pulling a fast one? Well i thought so... All those ES members from the US do not be suprised if you bump into this lowlife in the future... Mystic please contact the Embassy and check this out, do not let him have the last laugh...
Absolutely and he's a smart one. If he had kept it going until he got the visa then she'd definitely contact them when he went MIA but this way she'd have no reason to even suspect he'd go through with it.
I only know this because a friend of mine's husband came here on a K-3 and has been living here without her for a little while now. They don't even check at the airport that the wife is picking him up. It's the perfect scan. Of course he's only good for two years though AND he can't legally work but this other dude is working under the table, which we all know is easy enough to do. Can't drive either but he's in the city so no need for a license.
Seriously this guy is a slimey one. Sick mother my $@@**. My husband knew the consequences of leaving his sisters before we agreed to marry and it was a BIG azz decision on his part to even commit to me. If Momen didn't take it that seriously and make a mature decision about it be thankful he's no where near you life. You don't need someone that immature in your world.
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Sash, I've read here for 3 years and people come here initially when they have problems, but very few come here when everything has been fine, then come back to say things have turned bad.
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: ...She is a wonderful woman.
As for the reasons, I do not know what is true and what isnt. Allah and Momen are the only ones that know this....If what he tells me isnt true then Allah will deal with him and so will his conscience.
Don't count on his "conscience" bothering him, if he had one you wouldn't be here telling us he dumped you for his mommy.
You need to wake the ƒuck up and stop lying to yourself, stat.
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
we know the truth Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
All I can say, the whole story sometimes seems surreal to me. But it DID happen, and it should be a lesson, a warning to all those who take (such) decisions in the twinkling of an eye.
Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
Excellent information from Doodlebug on the visa process. Call the embassy now and find out the truth! Don't let him get away with this if he is pulling a scam on you. As far as his mother goes, she may be thinking he's leaving to join you and has no clue her precious son is doing otherwise. This guy wants his cake and eat it, too.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Guys, I hope you are finished soon discussing this failed relationship.
Posted by ***** (Member # 14677) on :
LOL@TL I am fairly new here and cannot believe how this saga continues, I really do not know what to believe anymore, seems as though MH has a long history with unsavoury men, I think she should be more discerning in her choice of men. I wish MH all the best
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
MH take a few months to heal, when the summer comes, take you and YOUR CHILDREN all on vacation somewhere and start to mend that relationship. I can only imagine what they have witnessed so far, they are slates and you write on their empty slates who they will become in everything you do, say and the choices you make. Teach your daughter(s) that it's better to be alone than to have a bad man, you are strong enough without him/them. Teach her how to survive and push on and learn from mistakes...I'm quite sure this will affect her in years to come, and I feel sorry for that. Best of luck.
Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
Very good advice, actually, there is really to much well said things on this thread. Good luck Mh, i really hope you are feeling better very soon.
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Good morning, dear Mystic!!
How are you today?? A little better, hopefully?? Or still hiding away from everyone, shutting out the world, not taking calls, just sitting in your room, moping, thinking and crying?? If so - STOP THAT NOW!!!!
You KNOW from experience that that is no good for you at all, that on the contrary, you will only get stuck in those hopeless thoughts and feel more and more down... DON'T allow that to happen, do not give in!!
You HAVE to get yourself out of this overwhelming depression - not just for yourself, but for YOUR KIDS, too!! Look, just over a year ago - before this whole thing started - you were ALSO so deeply down that you were hiding in your room crying for days on end... At the time you claimed your kids 'did not notice' and were not affected by this...
Sorry, but you are WRONG on that, of course your children will 'notice' Mom hiding and crying all day.. Yes, you have reason now to be sad - but tell me, is this how you want your kids to think of you??? Some weak-heart woman who is forever crying and hiding from the world?? Do you know what you are teaching them there?? Do you know how they must WORRY about you??
FOR THEM, as much as for yourself, you MUST GET OUT OF THAT ROOM TODAY!!! Just for a little while.. But DO try and get outside, do something today... Look, all staying in there will not make the problem go away, only that the longer you hide, the harder it will be to get back... So force yourself to be active (even just going grocery shopping or going for a walk) for an hour, then you may hide again for a bit, then you come out again...
No-one is expecting you to be completely normal and jolly straight away, but you have to slowly START to make things better again..
I'd really love to get a daily progress report from you - by all means, continue talking about HIM, too, to get rid off your hurt - I'm glad you are writing at all - but it would be great if you could mention something else, too!! See, you have no choice really, you will need to get used to life without him - so let's make a beginning, okay???
Besides, there are at least 3 practical things, which you ought to deal with asap - how is your work situation?? Are you covered with a sick-note?? If not, sort this out, otherwise another set of problems awaits you on coming out...
Then - doooooo call the Embassy to find out the current status quo. Just because your own details are a bit hazy - you originally wrote on Tuesday 11 March that 'his interview WAS SET FOR SUNDAY 9 March' but on Friday 7 March he called you to call it all off and ask for a divorce... So, did he ever still go for this interview, or did he leave it, knowing he would stay in Egypt??? I mean, the above details conflict with 'he told them to keep the visa' - how, on the phone on Friday, too?? Or when?? Whatever, for YOUR peace of mind, find out from them what happened!!
Also, IF he did get the visa intending to use it secretly - I am saying 'IF', okay, so just find out!!! - and he then DOES use it and something happens, this could get well expensive for the sponsor (your mother, right??). So for HER sake you need to know what's what.
And lastly, as mentioned yesterday - WHO is paying for this divorce??? Where and how will this take place?? You SHOULD look into this urgently, before you find yourself lumbered with a whole lot of expenses for something you never wanted in the first place!!! After all, an international divorce can be complicated and costly, so don't let him make a fool out of you on top of everything else...
All HARD and unwanted stuff to deal with, I know - but sadly very necessary, which is why it it so important for you to switch off a little in between...
So come on now, dear Mystic, pleeeeease get out today!!! And write and tell us about it!!!
Get better, much love, Bubble
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
Congratulations,Bubblesperson,you`re doing a great,down to earth job.No cutesy,nice/nice,fluffy words that lead nowwhere,but a usefull daily dose of professional,helpful advice. That is what a real friendly intervention.
Thumbs up and keep the good work!! Posted by elizabethN (Member # 14096) on :
this whole thing does not make any logical sense. He would of certainly had these feelings way before this about his mother. He just figured he didn't want to leave her at his visa interview? I don't think so. So he knows he is not coming here but goes to the interview and refuses the visa? I don't think so. When he met my husband all he talked about was his visa. So much that my hubby couldn't stand to be around him. I also heard where he lives in egypt men get married at a very early age. Anyways, none of this is making sense. We all have to cut the strings and leave our parents when we get married. This is a man who supposely works 18 hours a day so what company has he been to "mom"? Again, this makes no logical sense at all.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Of course it doesn't....
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Seriously who cares? I just hope MH gets over this trauma.... the sooner the better!!
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Enough men that would consider marriage as the ultimate solution when the mother passes away. They are the kind of men that want to be pampered, and when mother isn't there to do so, they are totally helpless. After reading it all, I advice you to inform the embassy anyway, maybe they can inform you about what happened for real. They cannot bring him back, guess you don't want that anyway, but this whole story is strange enough to get answers to your questions. Perhaps you will not find them, in that case you have to accept what happened,and go on with your life, how hard this may be. Don't transform your sadness to your children, because they will lose trust in relationships to. Collect all your power to be their parent, and don't make them part of this, it is damages them.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<When he met my husband all he talked about was his visa. So much that my hubby couldn't stand to be around him.>
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Yikes, that's telling...
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Hi Mystic!!
Where aaaare you?? Please check in, write something...
Bestest wishes, Bubble
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
I think MH has to work through a lot of things right now. Just give her some time.
Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
she should never have posted this here Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Of course, Tiger, definitely.. It would just be nice to see that she is around (and not collapsed), hence 'please check in' briefly...
Okay, tomorrow then, dear Mystic???
Thinking of you, hang in there!!
Much love, Bubble
Posted by MissNoor (Member # 12549) on :
And what if she collapsed? She has been to hell and back and one can not just give themselves a slap on the hand and continue on their merry way. She loved this man and it is not going to take overnight to forget! Mystic my paryers and thoughts are with you sweetie....
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Hi, dear Noor!!
I agree with you, naturally...
But if she collapsed, it would be reassuring to know that someone is with her and takes care of her.. Actually, either way it would be good to hear that she is not alone - not wanting to be hysterical or too panicky here, but our Mystic has actually attempted 'the way out' before, see... (That's all on here, too). Call me sthupid, but that has me very worried indeed, if such moods really, really set in, it is too easily done - that's why a 'check-in' would be so good.
Guess what I should ask here is whether anyone close friends with her has got her details and can find out she is 'around', that would be great!!!
If you see this, look after you, dear Mystic!! Hugs and best wishes, Bubble
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Let's just say as small details here and there have sank into my head i have hit the pissed as hell stage of this and pretty much he can ,,, nevermind, breathe, breathe, and do not be that way. Still pissed off though
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
((hug))
We are thinking of you MH.
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
(((hugs)))
Posted by Sparkle16 (Member # 13047) on :
Good Mystic....pissed off is a healthy reaction instead of all this "be a nice girl" s....! It is OK to get mad at someone who hasn't treated you well. You go girl! Get really mad..it will make you feel good.
Posted by Culture Club (Member # 13767) on :
quote:Originally posted by newcomer: I didn't say that I was hoping that they should reconcile or that I thought it would be for the best in this particular case, I was just stating a fact.
And whether you like the fact that Allah declared this 3 month waiting period in the Qur'an or not is irrelevant; it is a legal ruling in an Islamic marriage and needs to be taken into consideration when encouraging mystic to do anything.
And I am sure that she still gets "nafkah"/money from him for 3 months since he said talaq.
To vanish your sadness ya MH, please read quran any time you can and salat Tahajud, you can cry and share your sadness to Allah/God as a moslemah. It is better way for you now. Let everything to Allah, and do not think about what will happen in the future. "Que sera sera... what ever will be will be...the future is not ours to see... que sera sera... what will be will be...
In Islam, Mom is always number 1 for son, and for wife... husband is number 1. My husband really loves and cares his mom and as his wife, I also must take care his old mom.
I am still thinking and pray for you even I have chickenpox now .
Posted by Culture Club (Member # 13767) on :
quote:Originally posted by Almaz.: If the 'mother' story is true, and if in fact she is DYING, it is not unusual for a son that is used to project his own neediness on to his mother, to identify with the mother to whom he has to 'refuse' a request without feeling bad about himself, to the point of destroying his family.
The mother selfishness and control syndrome is not seen as such in countries like Egypt, Italy etc.. but more like a very 'normal' situation.
In MH case, if indeed it is true that he chose his mother over his wife and over a new improved life, this man is not going back to MH, not even when the mother passes.
His decision/reaction shows him as the controlled son.
In circumstances where the son-mother relationship is not based under the control and selfishness of the mother, the son would just have to postpone his trip, explaining the situation to the Embassy, and to the wife, then wait till the mother gets better or passes, continuing the long distance marriage, as it would be more logical than destroying it.
I agree with Almaz, that he can postpone it if he wants or maybe his mom asked him to marry other?
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Sweet Mystic!!
Bugged by strange insomnia, I got up again and thus see that you wrote in - hooray!! Great stuff!! Thanks for that!!
So, it's the 'really hopping mad' stage now, eh - breathe, breathe, you are right - still, that IS a good, healthy sign!! As was said by Sparkle, if someone treats you so bad and puts you through hell, you are definitely entitled to a fair amount of righteous anger - (even temporary hate and feelings of revenge, don't worry about that if it happens, it will pass soon enough, too, but it's still a whole lot better than just feeling raw with hurt) - for now go and beat some cushions or hurl them against the wall, screaming loudly, that's often a great release (for a while, at least - until things are truly back to normal in the days to come). Just let others in the house know what's going on ('anger management') if you go for that screaming thing behind closed doors...
Hopefully, with a mixture of that - anger, hiding, going out, meditation and prayer, all at their appropriate times - you'll find you are much better soon...
Sooo glad you checked in, still cheering you on, take care of you, Bubble
PS. I pm'ed you, did it arrive??
Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
Glad to see you are ok Mh
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
It seems you did not allow yourself time to grieve from the relationships previous to Mr. Mysticheart. So perhaps this is the *first real time* you are grieving ... and you need that to move on. Just to help you, there are 5 stages of grieving:
1-Denial- "this can't be happening to me", looking for the former spouse in familia places, or if it is death, setting the table for the person or acting as if they are still in living there. No crying. Not accepting or even acknowledging the loss.
2-Anger- "why me?", feelings of wanting to fight back or get even with spouse of divorce, for death, anger at the deceased, blaming them for leaving.
3-Bargaining- bargaining often takes place before the loss. Attempting to make deals with the spouse who is leaving, or attempting to make deals with God to stop or change the loss. Begging, wishing, praying for them to come back.
4-Depression -overwhelming feelings of hopelessness, frustration, bitterness, self pity, mourning loss of person as well as the hopes, dreams and plans for the future. Feeling lack of control, feeling numb. Perhaps feeling suicidal.
5-Acceptance- -there is a difference between resignation and acceptance. You have to accept the loss, not just try to bear it quietly. Realization that it takes two to make or break a marriage. Realization that the person is gone that it is not their fault, they didn't leave you on purpose. Finding the good that can come out of the pain of loss, finding comfort and healing. Our goals turn toward personal growth. Stay with fond memories of person.
Get help. You will survive. You will heal, even if you cannot believe that now, just know that it is true. To feel pain after loss is normal. It proves that we are alive, human. But we can't stop living. We have to become stronger, while not shutting off our feelings for the hope of one day being healed and finding love and/or happiness again. Helping others through something we have experienced is a wonderful way to fascilitate our healing and bring good out of something tragic. Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
I have kept up reading this mainly to see mystic posting. Alhamdulillah shes now getting angry! I also worried a bit as bubbles did, about the 'way out' but knowing mystic as she is, although a very sensitive lady she is a strong lady too under all that. only a strong lady would have shared this with everyone here and taken whatever she was given. She also has kids she is devoted to and THEY will keep her on the right road although it will be a rocky one, but she wont opt for 'that' way out. More of a crawl into a corner and cry/scream for a bit way out.
Mystic I would still like to hear you have been to see your doctor though, really you can get some help to free up your head a bit.
Dont know if you can get these in USA but BACH flower remedies are a natural way of helping, the Rescue Remedy is a concoction of different ones for major stress times, work great too although I didnt 'notice' how well until I stopped taking it Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
Yes they work good, and so does St johns wort, when you feel so low and depressed. Choose the drops rather than the capsuales.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
I'm afraid everybody around is expecting to much from MH. Only one week ago she told about what happened, so this is a relatively short time to recover isn't it? She will need her time, she will go through all stages in the time she needs. Nothing strange about that. And to MH: What at first sight looks and feels like a loss, might, on long term, help you to reach the biggest achievement in life. The nicest persons on earth are the ones who have expierenced a great loss and have been able to give it a place in mind. It forms the personality....
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by yorkshire rose: Yes they work good, and so does St johns wort, when you feel so low and depressed. Choose the drops rather than the capsuales.
St Johns Wart is great BUT NEVER take it if you are taking any other anti-depressant!! Its dangerous.
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Let's just say as small details here and there have sank into my head i have hit the pissed as hell stage of this and pretty much he can ,,, nevermind, breathe, breathe, and do not be that way. Still pissed off though
Good Girl mystic.
(Hugs)
Posted by DawnBev (Member # 11276) on :
agree with Ayisha re St Johns Wort - although herbal, it contraindicates with other herbal remedies etc, it can be very dangerous
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by ?????: I'm afraid everybody around is expecting to much from MH. Only one week ago she told about what happened, so this is a relatively short time to recover isn't it? She will need her time, she will go through all stages in the time she needs. Nothing strange about that.
I fully agree on that.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha:
quote:Originally posted by yorkshire rose: Yes they work good, and so does St johns wort, when you feel so low and depressed. Choose the drops rather than the capsuales.
St Johns Wart is great BUT NEVER take it if you are taking any other anti-depressant!! Its dangerous.
Good,good,Ayisha and DawnBev...im proud that you have this extremely important point on antidepressants sticking on your mind. Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
sash, I do consider myself quite an expert in the art of depression Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
And then you discovered the Honda Fourtrax quadbike, right? Posted by Karah_Mia (Member # 4668) on :
quote:Originally posted by desertgirl: And then you discovered the Honda Fourtrax quadbike, right?
No, Effexor XR.
Mystic - something just popped into my mind - if he did not want the visa, he would NOT go to the US embassy to just tell them that. If he DID go to the Embassy, he DID get the visa, period. Be careful - you are his sponsor and legally responsible for him if he makes it to the US, even if you are not aware of it.
Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
quote:Originally posted by desertgirl: And then you discovered the Honda Fourtrax quadbike, right?
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
too right desertgirl, no more depression Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Well at the moment am waiting on email from embassy, I have emailed them twice to ask what is going on but no response as thus far. I called DOS as well and was told to talk to my husband and find out cause they are unable to release any information due to privacy act?? Anyway, no i am not throwing pillows, I have contacted lawyers in egypt. What he did and is doing is wrong on so many levels and he knows it though at the moment he is busy trying to pretend he is the victim in front of a certain someone that knows he is married and is still staying with him in the flat. He thought he could fool me, and perhaps he thinks he can fool her as well, but he is doing the same cover with her as he did me, get a phone call and try to say as little as possible and in short tones so that as she listens she wont know what is really going on... Nice try for the cover dear. I shared some info with him and all of a sudden he doesnt want to be friends anymore, just wants out lolll, well, its not quite that simple, hence my contacting a lawyer. guess he thought oh, i will be nice and keep my wife hanging on the side in case this new prospective doesnt work out. Though he swears that this person is nothing and he would never ever be with her instead of me, that he would never leave me for someone else especially another foreigner as i am the very best person he has ever known,, at least this is what he was saying until she obviously was sitting there listening to him... Its ok, see the cheating, its what makes me strong cause I know full well i was a very good wife to him, the ONLY reason he walked away is because i wasnt the wife that would sit back and not question things that were noticed, or allow to be kept hidden when i did discover certain things. I demanded all his female friends know about me and well, poor guy, cant have a good wife and his play things as well.
Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
What happened to the 'dying mother' story?
Posted by Alchemist Shines On (Member # 12318) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Well at the moment am waiting on email from embassy, I have emailed them twice to ask what is going on but no response as thus far. I called DOS as well and was told to talk to my husband and find out cause they are unable to release any information due to privacy act?? Anyway, no i am not throwing pillows, I have contacted lawyers in egypt. What he did and is doing is wrong on so many levels and he knows it though at the moment he is busy trying to pretend he is the victim in front of a certain someone that knows he is married and is still staying with him in the flat. He thought he could fool me, and perhaps he thinks he can fool her as well, but he is doing the same cover with her as he did me, get a phone call and try to say as little as possible and in short tones so that as she listens she wont know what is really going on... Nice try for the cover dear. I shared some info with him and all of a sudden he doesnt want to be friends anymore, just wants out lolll, well, its not quite that simple, hence my contacting a lawyer. guess he thought oh, i will be nice and keep my wife hanging on the side in case this new prospective doesnt work out. Though he swears that this person is nothing and he would never ever be with her instead of me, that he would never leave me for someone else especially another foreigner as i am the very best person he has ever known,, at least this is what he was saying until she obviously was sitting there listening to him... Its ok, see the cheating, its what makes me strong cause I know full well i was a very good wife to him, the ONLY reason he walked away is because i wasnt the wife that would sit back and not question things that were noticed, or allow to be kept hidden when i did discover certain things. I demanded all his female friends know about me and well, poor guy, cant have a good wife and his play things as well.
Oh dear God, it's not Josette is it??!! Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
I'm sorry Mystic that you only saw this side to him now after all this time but at least it was before he came to live with you.
I really dont know what to advise you, as most has already been said. I just hope for you that you can meet someone in person first next time as the internet makes it very difficult to REALLY get to know someone, men and women, and since you appear to be a person with an open heart you leave yourself vulnerable to being hurt, or betrayed by men and women who are perhaps not as caring as you.
Its also very hard to really get to know each other and whether you are compatible, because when there is distance between you its easy to be swept away with the romance and who you hope that person is, rather than who they really are.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I knew it wasn't the mother, some things you can just feel. Although considering what she knew prior to marrying him I can't say she should be all so surprised.
Divorce him already MH and if I were you, I would never call him again. What is the point? Best of luck. Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
That is the story he still stands by, I know better. Small little details fit perfectly into what i have come to believe. Sure, he doesnt want to leave his mom, that much is true and her health is not good but, that just doesnt justify ending a marriage, not if you love that person. Just little things add up and fit into what i have come to believe, and now he is making a show in front of her to make her think he is the victim, that i am just a horrible woman that wont leave him alone looool.. Nope, but i am a woman that deserves something back.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
What do you deserve? Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
More than I will ever get for sure. One day he will look back and regret what he did to me more than he already does. He will see that he should have never let me go and that no one will ever be as good to him as i was.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: One day he will look back and regret what he did to me more than he already does. He will see that he should have never let me go and that no one will ever be as good to him as i was.
Mystic, that's what you like to think. But fact is you don't deserve such a creep. You have to think about yourself now, how to end this drama without getting too much humilated and hurt.
Is he really having another woman in his life???? Now I am getting mad!! Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Ha, i can give her name, her link to her facebook and more. And i did message her before she went to egypt and let her know that we are married and all that and i had no problems with him having friends and she responded rather curiously... but now that she is there and his behavior has suddenly changed to sooo cold and short with me and the fact that she is using the phone line for the mobile i had when i was there, ha, yeah, i know what is going on..
Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
is she from ES?
do you know her?
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Maybe one thing that will comfort you: She only will be abused, as so many others have been abused. She is having no problems with knowing you as the wife of and get involved with the mr., it only will be temporary.
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
What a RAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Name her and shame her MH. Spill it.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by harankash: is she from ES?
do you know her?
Yeah I wonder too!!
Posted by DawnBev08 (Member # 14964) on :
what creeps, both of them - grrrrrrrrrrrr
Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
The guy is a creep and jerk. . .plain and simple. I can't believe as a good Muslim he's shacking up with another woman when he's married to someone else. Better you found out now than to get him to the states & he takes all you have before you find out he's cheating on the side, too, and embarrassing you in front of your whole community. Talk about giving Muslims a bad reputation.
I'll be going to Cairo in May. . .want me to pay a visit? Maybe I can take a tour with him and then <bam!>. . .let him have a piece of my mind in front of everyone. Wow. . .that's a thought. . .hey, Momen. . .if you're reading this, be aware that you just never know when one of the people on one of your tours is going to go mental on you. Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
Did his mother know you was married some egyptians done even tell them until the embassy checks up on them then its all blazing .
Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bonzo: The guy is a creep and jerk. . .plain and simple. I can't believe as a good Muslim he's shacking up with another woman when he's married to someone else. Better you found out now than to get him to the states & he takes all you have before you find out he's cheating on the side, too, and embarrassing you in front of your whole community. Talk about giving Muslims a bad reputation.
I'll be going to Cairo in May. . .want me to pay a visit? Maybe I can take a tour with him and then <bam!>. . .let him have a piece of my mind in front of everyone. Wow. . .that's a thought. . .hey, Momen. . .if you're reading this, be aware that you just never know when one of the people on one of your tours is going to go mental on you.
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
Mo'men is a fuckin fast food joint.
Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
I'm sorry, but I'm not angry with him, I'm angry with YOU, mystic.
It was clear from his posts alone that he was a sleaze that was so slick, satellites could spot him.
So many posters wrote this. It was YOU YOU YOU who defended him to death, with your supportive posse of internet friends.
Stop focusing on what a jerk HE is, and start focusing on WHY YOU CHOOSE TO BE IN RELATIONSHIPS WITH MEN WHO ARE CLEARLY BELOW YOU.
GET PROFESSIONAL HELP.
ps And don't you dare play the victim card on us anymore with these posts.
You chose not to listen to good advice for a reason and it's time you did some self-examining.
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI: It was clear from his posts alone that he was a sleaze that was so slick, satellites could spot him.
I think ExptinCAI is right about this... Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
I mean, c'mon! Laura posted links where this guy was trawling on the net for any foreign bride. How many vowels do you need to buy before you get a clue?
This has nothing to do with that sleazebag mystic and frankly I had forgotten what I wrote on that post myself a year ago. It's really sad to be right but again, that's got nothing to do with your husband and everything to do with you.
You simply love being the victim and it's as awful to watch as a bloody car crash.
Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Ha, i can give her name, her link to her facebook and more. And i did message her before she went to egypt and let her know that we are married and all that and i had no problems with him having friends and she responded rather curiously... but now that she is there and his behavior has suddenly changed to sooo cold and short with me and the fact that she is using the phone line for the mobile i had when i was there, ha, yeah, i know what is going on..
I'd do it. You should send her a link to this website as well.
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Hi, dear Expat!!
While I agree with you in part - foolish, soppy, blindly romantic internet friends and too much defense - it is not right to blame Mystic now... Neither will it do much good, what's done is done, point is, how she reacts NOW!!
And why is it not right?? Because I swear to you (long distance diagnosis based on many writings, I'm certain enough it's accurate, so there) that in Mystic's condition AT THE TIME there was nothing else she could do. Do not treat this as a 'normal' situation with two rational, well-balanced people, it was anything but. Yes, she had lots of good advice and warnings, however, again due to then prevailing state she LITERALLY COULD NOT hear any of that. Would have needed a person on the spot to force her to immediate treatment, not possible from us. So, yeah, this was not good, but NOT actually her fault, if you see what I mean.
Anyhow, thing now is what Mystic will take and learn from this, and signs are hopeful...
No offense meant to you, dear Expat, but ill people just ARE different..
Dear Mystic!!
I am proud of you that you ARE now seeing things as they are - no longer making excuses, but recognising this and him for what it is. VERY well done!! In a way absolutely dreadful, on the other hand, now that you know this, you can see how misplaced any affection and sadness was / is - which means that you WILL be able to put this behind you so much quicker...
Calling lawyers instead of throwing cushions is - WOW!!! Yep, your strength is coming to the forefront, cheer, cheer, cheering, you are facing and tackling things, fantastic!!!
And on the visa - that worries me for sponsor - I am not sure how it works in the US, but in Europe you (sponsor) would need to write (not only e-mail, post with real signature) to Embassy and Immigration Control that you WITHDRAW the sponsorship forthwith, in which case the visa will be immediately cancelled. To avoid any future problems, it is imperative to put it on record with the authorities BEFORE he should enter the US that sponsorship is withdrawn - just in case he slips through... Also, a withdrawal requires a response from Embassy, so do let them know!! (By e-mail, while you express the signed letter).
Hope that all goes well, hang in there, continue like this!!! Much love, Bubble
Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
bubbles, you're very sweet but if you read through the previous posts, you will notice mystic sought people in a similar situation to hers and made friends with those posters and together with some kind hearted folk on ES, she received lots and lots of blind encouragement and support. She also received some harsh posts to shake and wake her.
She's made bad decisions and now she's getting support to the tune of...at least you found out now.
WTF. Seriously. She found out before she married him about his character and she still married him.
I applaud you for your efforts and I criticize people who know her in real life for NOT dragging this woman's behind to a professional counselor.
Those poor kids are going to be so screwed up!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI: I'm sorry, but I'm not angry with him, I'm angry with YOU, mystic.
It was clear from his posts alone that he was a sleaze that was so slick, satellites could spot him.
So many posters wrote this. It was YOU YOU YOU who defended him to death, with your supportive posse of internet friends.
Stop focusing on what a jerk HE is, and start focusing on WHY YOU CHOOSE TO BE IN RELATIONSHIPS WITH MEN WHO ARE CLEARLY BELOW YOU.
GET PROFESSIONAL HELP.
ps And don't you dare play the victim card on us anymore with these posts.
You chose not to listen to good advice for a reason and it's time you did some self-examining.
So true, unfortunately. Don't make it in vain anymore MH, learn from it and get SMART.
I also agree about the kids. If MH was smart she would also put the kids in therapy ASAP. As much as she may not think they are affected, TRUST ME I'm sure they are. Again, involving kids in adult situations is cruel. Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI:
She's made bad decisions and now she's getting support to the tune of...at least you found out now.
while i agree and understand why you are saying what you are, this is true ExptinCAI, because even though people may have told her these things in the past, she believed that she knew him better, and maybe she did, so even those close to her would not have been able to tell her. In fact those close to her seemed to say he was a 'doting' husband. I dont know, i've never met either of them, I can only comment on what is said here, but at least she has witnessed certain things for herself now that have made her see him in a different light.
As you say, sometimes people dont want to see the truth, there are lots of people like that on this board, and they have their own reasons for wanting to be hopeful, I agree that people need to love themselves first rather than looking to someone else to fulfil them, but people get hooked on needing others, whether as a result of societal pressure, experiences or habit, so in a sense they are still victims. Posted by civil society (Member # 14880) on :
contact the embassy for visa fraud and make sure he won't ever move to the usa let alone even visit.
Posted by CheezyPoof (Member # 8386) on :
MH, like Bubbles said, you must write a letter to USCIS and DOS to withdraw your petition and support papers. Please do this ASAP! Make an infopass appointment at your local USCIS center ASAP. Take a copy of the letter with you. Make your intentions known to anyone who will listen. Do not let this man enter the US with a fraudulent visa. We don't need more garbage here.
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Civil society, dont you think that is a bit harsh?
O.k so maybe this man is not as good a muslim as he ought to be, maybe he's a womaniser, maybe he lies, and he has let mystic heart down badly.
But he hasn't committed a crime, maybe he changed his mind and is none of the above, who really knows - only him and God.
people break up everyday, it shouldnt stop them leaving the country in the future or even give them a bad name for life.
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
I know, I know, dear Expat, and yes, this has been like watching a car with no brakes going downhill speedily, just heartbreaking / worrying / infuriating... The soppy 'friends' should feel ever so bad and guilty now - and hopefully learned to never, ever give 'advice' again - as for the 'harsh posts', some of them were from me, too, of which I now (seemingly cruelly, had to be done to 'move' something) reminded Mystic, in the hope she may now agree with the (desperate) NEED for therapy..
Because, big, fat YES, as soon as the practical things here (visa etc) are sorted, looking at WHY one acts so, is still the number one thing which WILL turn life around if you, Mystic, only do it...
Still, all blaming her now and making her feel bad and silly is not going to get her to go - by the way, Mystic, a therapist will NEVER tell you that, they only help for you to come to your own conclusions and know yourself far, far better. No need to be scared!!
But yeah, let's critise all those around in real life who just stood by, irresponsible 'friends'..
However, credit must now be given where it is due - our Mystic IS holding up far better than last time round, the anger, insight and actual taking concrete steps IS GREAT!!!! Keep it up...
Love to you, Expat, and yes, I appreciate where you are coming from.. To you love as well, dear Mystic... Bubble
Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI: bubbles, you're very sweet but if you read through the previous posts, you will notice mystic sought people in a similar situation to hers and made friends with those posters and together with some kind hearted folk on ES, she received lots and lots of blind encouragement and support. She also received some harsh posts to shake and wake her.
She's made bad decisions and now she's getting support to the tune of...at least you found out now.
WTF. Seriously. She found out before she married him about his character and she still married him.
I applaud you for your efforts and I criticize people who know her in real life for NOT dragging this woman's behind to a professional counselor.
Those poor kids are going to be so screwed up!
I was one of the ones who got accused as being too hard on MH when she first announced getting married. I agree that her true friends are guilty of encouraging her to "follow her heart" & marrying this guy.
Given that, no benefit for me to say "I told you so" because the writing was on the wall over a year ago. His picture alone screams "PLAYER" all over it.
Now with that said, I'm glad to hear she's not collapsed on the floor somewhere and at least is angry. I still think professional help is needed and as I've mentioned already in this thread, her kids are affected by all this drama even if she thinks she's fooling them. Take it from one who can speak from personal experience.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
This woman is not on ES that i am aware of. Though I know he has seen this thread as of a few days ago and i am sure he is watching it so with her sitting around , unless he is checking it when he is "away" from her, she is seeing it as well. How exactly they met i am uncertain of, I do know her brother is now his flatmate. She is american, and a student..lives in seattle washington well is from there anyway. Her phone number is a seattle number, she was in california when he arranged her tickets to come, which was part of his lies to me, i watched him do it, he said it was a favor for a friend.
Anyway, she can have him. He proved to be a very good liar and that is exactly what he is doing to her, He was not a good husband once i discovered some of the hidden things and he will never be. Yes his family and mom knew we are married.
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Dear Mrs!!!
I apologise if I say something you already know, buuuut - as someone with 8 years experience of living in Egypt, I can only tell you that sadly the numbers of scam artists specialising in the 'looove'-thing with unsuspecting foreigners are astonishingly HUGE, there are literally thousands of women so conned each year. FACT.
It is not out of the ordinary at all for a guy to accept a marriage / visa / invitation / sponsorship, go to different country and then hit the underground, oftentimes never even arriving with the lady - and when a woman finds out about such LIKELY intentions, I think she is entitled to feel betrayed and treated like fool and so STOP what there still is to stop...
ALSO, should such a scammer enter on a sponsorship so obtained, THE SPONSOR is legally responsible for any and all costs incurred by him - let's say medical bills, hospital, jail for being illegal before repatriation (once caught) AND repatration on normal scheduled expensive flight, sometimes even in company of (to be paid) officials. That is THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS, even tens of thousands, you are potentially looking at, so OF COURSE and MOST SPEEDILY Mystic needs to do all she can to protect HERSELF...
Be good, best wishes, Bubble
PS. Visa fraud and entry on fraudulently obtained visa IS a crime.
Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
What i dont understand if his mum knew you was married surely she would have seen at one point he was going to live in America hopefully has not happend ,so if he so concerned of leaving his mommy then how come he went ahead to marry you . And im seen from links he was going to live in china and cyprus did she make a fuss then or was that a scam to get women too .
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Ooooh, dear Mrs... BUT NATURALLY all of that nonsense (bet you he's not been to a Chinese, let alone China... Think he's a millionaire?!?! How would he have gone and got that visa???) was a scam for introductions, and the Mommy story suuuuuuch old crap heard millions of times...
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: More than I will ever get for sure. One day he will look back and regret what he did to me more than he already does. He will see that he should have never let me go and that no one will ever be as good to him as i was.
"He will regret, he will regret..."
Again this is normal that you feel this way. With time you WILL become completely indifferent and you won't give a damn what this guy is doing, where and with whom. He is not worth you. Full stop. I've been 'there' too, so to say.
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
There's a saying in Egypt:
Daill el kalb 3omroh mayet3edel!
A dog tail is never straight
and another one for this scum bag:
El watty, watty tool 2omroh
The low will always stay low
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bubblesperson: Dear Mrs!!!
PS. Visa fraud and entry on fraudulently obtained visa IS a crime.
Of course I know this Bubble, I do think she should stop the processes, I was referring to the remark that he should never enter the country again etc etc. I do know that many men marry for visas etc, but no one knows whether he has/was doing this, he may just have changed his mind, after all, if he had married for a visa surely he wouldn't have called it off?? he would have waited until he was in America.
Anyway, I dont know, I dont know him or her, but I dont think its healthy for Mystic to feel used either. He may have just simply changed his mind.
I just hope now that Mystic can be happy and get over all of this ASAP Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Surely if he had taken visa, then the authorities would check his place of residence. My friend married a Polish girl a long time ago, before Poland was in EU and the authorities came to their home to check they were actually living together as man and wife, the usual things, clothes in wardrobe, photos, 2 toothbrushes etc!
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: Surely if he had taken visa, then the authorities would check his place of residence. My friend married a Polish girl a long time ago, before Poland was in EU and the authorities came to their home to check they were actually living together as man and wife, the usual things, clothes in wardrobe, photos, 2 toothbrushes etc!
Correct. I know even certain 'examples' in person.
Posted by CheezyPoof (Member # 8386) on :
Not always the case. No one ever checked my husband's place of residence prior to or after he received his visa.
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: Surely if he had taken visa, then the authorities would check his place of residence. My friend married a Polish girl a long time ago, before Poland was in EU and the authorities came to their home to check they were actually living together as man and wife, the usual things, clothes in wardrobe, photos, 2 toothbrushes etc!
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Yes Makbeta, I thought so. I know this was UK and not America, but I would think checks would be made.I think it was about 14 years ago. Can't believe they've been married all that time!
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by CheezyPoof: Not always the case. No one ever checked my husband's place of residence prior to or after he received his visa.
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: Surely if he had taken visa, then the authorities would check his place of residence. My friend married a Polish girl a long time ago, before Poland was in EU and the authorities came to their home to check they were actually living together as man and wife, the usual things, clothes in wardrobe, photos, 2 toothbrushes etc!
In Britain it was commonplace though. There were a lot of 'paper marriages' so the authorities checked on the newly-weds just to make sure it was not another case of visa fraud. Sad but true. Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Oh ok, it must depend on the country or area.
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
We don't know that he 'called it off'. This is what he SAID, but it needs confirmation.
The place of residence can only be checked AFTER the supposed day of travel / entry. IF he does not arrive at the place of residence, since a) he did not tell sponsor he is coming (called off ALL, right), and b) went underground right away (perhaps straight to new friend??), then all that will happen is that authorities and sponsor now know he's a conman, but he's still in - and sponsor in trouble...
Also, DO read Doodle's informative post on what happens upon entry.
All of this is currently speculation, yes, but still falls under 'very necessary damage limitation control'.
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
Sorry Mrs i disagree, This 'man' is a low life to do this. I haven't been here that long and did not know of the troubles MH had had in her past and in how/why/what/where did she meet this guy until reading these past posts and getting an idea of what was the background to it all. He needs to be stopped as the others have said she will be responsable for him, this 'man' has no scruples or heart, it was ALL about him and him only. This is the ty pe of 'man' who will carry on and on and on.
Report him i say MH! He will at least be on the blacklist!
It is good to be angry MH but don't waste anymore money (on calling him) just leave him be. He will get his just desserts one day i am sure
I wish you all the best, your not the first most certainly not the last...... live and learn.....live and learn
Take care all Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
How do you know his mother knew you were his wife if you never lived here? Just from visiting? Does she speak English? Did you sleep in the same bed together under her roof?
I guess I don't blame you for being angry that as of this moment he is playing house with some other girl- but stop thinking you are the best he would have ever gotten...why are you still thinking that? Sounds like what this sort of man needs is a tough Egyptian woman who is going to kick his *** into shape...sorry to say. You were simply not that woman, call it fate (or luck!). Makes you wonder if there wasn't another woman while you were there with him, too. Yuk! Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
No one ever checked my hubby lived with me here in the uk. I think it may only be for people they may suspect. We did have 2 kiddies though
Saying that friends that i know have never been checked either where no kiddies were involved.
Maybe it is like bingo Some win (visits) some don't Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
Are you repeating yourself smuckers? Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<So many posters wrote this. It was YOU YOU YOU who defended him to death, with your supportive posse of internet friends.>
<blindly romantic internet friends and too much defense>
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<I criticize people who know her in real life for NOT dragging this woman's behind to a professional counselor.>
Those are NOT real friends. Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: More than I will ever get for sure. One day he will look back and regret what he did to me more than he already does. He will see that he should have never let me go and that no one will ever be as good to him as i was.
I know you would like to think that, but sadly that is not true. Many women say these exact words to make themselves feel better. Bottom Dwellers never feel regret for their behavior. They suck the life out of one victim and move on to the next with no remorse or regret whatsoever. You have to care about someone to have regrets and he doesnt have it in him. Men like this play on woman and are able to con them because they seek out emotionally damaged women,women with little to no self esteem. They rip through them and move on to the next without one bit of remorse. Why?? Because women like you allow them to thats why!!! Men only respect women who respect themselves. Men only Love women who love themselves, Bottom line.
Im gonna tell you for the last time-quit putting your whole life out there for sympathy and false validation. Go get therapy! I can guarantee with every penny I have until you learn you are important, you are strong and you are worth more than this sad existance that you have put yourself in that you will continue with the same kind of relationships. Healthy relationships are formed by Healthy people who love themselves. That is how to succeed and find real happiness and a quality man.
Oh yeah, one more thing. You may think Im saying this out of harshness as you have in the past but Im telling you because you really need people to be straight up with you, not absolve you. You may have had a bad hand growing up, I dont doubt it because of your patterns with men and your so obvious lack of self esteem and for that You do have my sympathy.That is the only sympathy I am going to give you. YOU are an adult woman and you have to take responsibilty to change/fix what is wrong inside of you. You cannot go through life playing the victim,it only holds for so long. This isnt the right way to live life mystic, if you are strong enough to constantly survive being beaten down then you are strong enough to get REAL help so you can have a normal life.
I believe you are that strong so face your weaknesses and turn them into strengths. Break the pattern and be an example for your daughter so she will never fall victim to a low-life scum-sucking bottom dweller!!Do not listen to fake sympathy, christ that is the worst thing you can do..Good luck!!! Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
< she was in california when he arranged her tickets to come>
Mystic...does this mean he bought her flight tickets and not yours????? Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: More than I will ever get for sure. One day he will look back and regret what he did to me more than he already does. He will see that he should have never let me go and that no one will ever be as good to him as i was.
I know you would like to think that, but sadly that is not true. Many women say these exact words to make themselves feel better. Bottom Dwellers never feel regret for their behavior. They suck the life out of one victim and move on to the next with no remorse or regret whatsoever. You have to care about someone to have regrets and he doesnt have it in him. Men like this play on woman and are able to con them because they seek out emotionally damaged women,women with little to no self esteem. They rip through them and move on to the next without one bit of remorse. Why?? Because women like you allow them to thats why!!! Men only respect women who respect themselves. Men only Love women who love themselves, Bottom line.
(...)
I believe you are that strong so face your weaknesses and turn them into strengths. Break the pattern and be an example for your daughter so she will never fall victim to a low-life scum-sucking bottom dweller!!Do not listen to fake sympathy, christ that is the worst thing you can do..Good luck!!!
True. True. True.
Now BREAK the pattern so that your child/children won't 'copy' you in the future, which they might do subconsciously.
They say that children of alcoholics often become alcoholics themselves. Children who were beaten by parents often resort to corporal punishment themselves when they are adults. The chain must be broken. And the first step is to realise and admit that there is something wrong with ... ME.
There's no reason to be too harsh on yourself though. Vice versa. Learn to love yourself more - now.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
Alhamdulillah she has seen the light!!!!!
Now Mystic has taken the jigsaw pieces she has obviously been getting during this marriage and is putting them together and seeing the bigger picture of what she married.
Bubbles is right, she couldnt listen before but bits of the jigsaw lodged in the back of her brain and are coming out now. I have been in exactly the same place, no matter how many tell you hes an arse you see a hero, until you reach the point she is now and sees he is in fact an arse. The other woman is just another victim of his, I feel sorry for her as soon she will be in Mystics shoes, there are probably many others. Now Mystic will start to heal, she knows she is better off, I hope.
I can see how some may be angry with her now, the 'we told you so' people, and I agree to a point but I think she knows that and knew that when she posted here. Fact is she didnt listen and learned for herself, im like that too, have to make my own mistakes.
I love the idea about creating havoc on a tour, I have been spitting at Spring Tours buses for a while now anyway Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
quote:Originally posted by Makbeta: True. True. True.
Now BREAK the pattern so that your children won't 'copy' you in the future, which they might do subconsciously.
They say that children of alcoholics often become alcoholics themselves. Children who were beaten by parents often resort to corporal punishment themselves when they are adults. The chain must be broken. And the first step is to realise and admit that there is something wrong with ... ME.
So true. This point can't be emphasized enough, your daughter WILL copy you, so think of what you want her to be like and be that.
Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
omigosh (in response to playing the field while with you). please get a set of std tests mystic. i can just imagine the attitude toward condom use in a marriage with an egyptian man (let alone a supposedly "good muslim" man who's not a "player")
IF his new *ahem* of his is reading this, please don't be so stupid as to not MAKE HIM PUT ON a condom. Even if all this is a lie. Just be safe, not sorry five years from now.
You ladies may get more than a broken heart if you don't protect your bodies.
Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: Alhamdulillah she has seen the light!!!!! I can see how some may be angry with her now, the 'we told you so' people, and I agree to a point but I think she knows that and knew that when she posted here. Fact is she didnt listen and learned for herself, im like that too, have to make my own mistakes. I love the idea about creating havoc on a tour, I have been spitting at Spring Tours buses for a while now anyway
Totally agree with you Ayisha, save for the fact that Mystic has now told us about the THIRD BAD MAN who has devastated her world IN A ROW, with TWO of the last ones being long-distance webcam relationships with Egyptians.
Where exactly has she "seen the light"? Because she's recognized this one is a jerk, finally?
That's not going to break her cycle.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8: < she was in california when he arranged her tickets to come>
Mystic...does this mean he bought her flight tickets and not yours?????
She gave him a credit card number that one could not be validated so he called and got another.. have no idea if he sent her the money ahead of time or not ,, i just know that he used a card from her to start with, then her fathers card. Lawyer is investigating that part as well for court to see what western unions were sent in his name other than to me in the last 6 months.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
Good luck,and never step back,MH.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI:
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: Alhamdulillah she has seen the light!!!!! I can see how some may be angry with her now, the 'we told you so' people, and I agree to a point but I think she knows that and knew that when she posted here. Fact is she didnt listen and learned for herself, im like that too, have to make my own mistakes. I love the idea about creating havoc on a tour, I have been spitting at Spring Tours buses for a while now anyway
Totally agree with you Ayisha, save for the fact that Mystic has now told us about the THIRD BAD MAN who has devastated her world IN A ROW, with TWO of the last ones being long-distance webcam relationships with Egyptians.
Where exactly has she "seen the light"? Because she's recognized this one is a jerk, finally?
That's not going to break her cycle.
I do need to clarify something in that as well. One of the 3 egyptian men i was with was not a bad man. No things didnt go perfectly , but , he was always honest with me at least. No, not Momen. But, that one was a very good man. He just changed from wanting marriage and to live here with me 5 years ago , to not wanting to live in the states. With him, I understand his reasons and for a time i fooled myself into thinking that i could do just the visits and be ok with no marriage. Over time i just wanted more and he couldnt offer more. He was and still is my best friend. I left him behind and didnt speak to him for more than a year now out of respect to my husband, however, he and I have started talking a while ago again. NO I AM NOT getting involved with him, he and I have been down that road now 3 times, we both care about each other greatly, but we know that at this point in our lives neither can give the other what we truly want, but we can however be wonderful close friends. He has been a huge huge help to me through all of this. As always, he has been the only person that knows just what to say to me to reach me and keep me sane. 2 were bad men, this one wasnt, just couldnt give me what i needed and wanted me there for him even though he knew he couldnt be what i needed.
Posted by Sparkle16 (Member # 13047) on :
What a sleaze bag!! You are so lucky that you didn't invest another more time or money in this creep. Don't waste another moment's thought on him.
Posted by Sparkle16 (Member # 13047) on :
Pardon me for saying this but why would you spend time and money on a lawyer trying to "right" this wrong. Do you really have the money! I don't understand why he married you? What is he getting out of this? If he has moved on to another person, he is not going to move to the US with her either. Have you been giving him money Mystic! What is he gaining from all this. Sex, maybe! But why get married. He can get that anyway. Visa, he has obviously had the opportunity to get visas before with other woman! Money, maybe....someone has to be giving him money. I think there is more to this then meets the eye. Don't spend anymore time or money on him Mystic. You will just get hurt even more and then be broke on top of it.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I didnt give him money, he never would accept it from me and always got upset with me if i took money out of the bank to spend instead of asking him for money. He was very insistant that i not spend anything. Things do happen, i dont think all of this is what he intended from the start,, just with all the pressure of everything and her coming along, well the grass looked greener i think, its ok. he can go on, i dont need him. Some where out there is some one that actually deserves me,, i know that sounds soo conceited and i truly dont think i am better than anyone but i do know that i always give my best to everyone, but i do demand respect as well. I give many chances to them if i find i am not being respected, i state what i want, i compromise, but i guess some see it as being pushy. Yorkie can tell everyone how much i give and how much he was my life, i didnt do him wrong, so, if he feels he wants to go , then go, his loss, whatever.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Mystic, why you didn't say straight out what happened?? It would have been so much easier to understand everything.
Anyway, be angry right now, but also clear everything in your favor, move on and never look back.
As I said earlier you don't deserve such a creep. Him and this other woman are both such losers in the whole thing and it won't last as someone previously projected out.
You deserve so much better and you know it. But seriously I would stay away from internet relationships from now on .... meet someone in real life in your area, don't rush into anything rather take your time to get to know someone well before making any plans.
Good luck and head up.
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Now everyone please dont misunderstand me, I am not saying that he is a 'good guy', but dont you think all of this reaction is a little one sided? He's now been written off as a cheat, fraud, money grabber, scammer, maybe has aids, lier.
He may well be all those things, but equally he may not be some of them. It is usual when people break up for someone to think the worst about someone else, but is it necessary? otherwise imagination run away with us and pretty soon he will be an axe murder too. I dont personally think that it helps Mystic to think that she has been scammed, that he always had bad intentions, that he never loved her, whatever...no one knows all of that.
Perhaps i am wrong and maybe he is all these things, I just think it IS easy to get a bit carried away. I'm not saying that his involvement with this other woman is right, AT ALL, but that just makes him a cheat, if thats what he has done. Pity he hasnt come on here to put his side of the story, because this has turned into a bit of a mothers meeting IMO.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Whatever the man may be or might have been, it does not matter to her, it does not matter to us. Everybody with a bit of knowledge about Egypt and Egyptians know these things happen, and those men exist. Everybody with a bit of rationalism knows the risk of being scammed is high. Everybody with a bit of expierence knows how to recognise them, people don't even have to be in a m/f relationship to get scammed, it happens in all forms and does exist in many ways. Just the fact being western and probably ready for offering benefits is enough. Anybody with a bit of expierence in the whole culture knows when to be cautius... Egyptians themselves are having a rather black and white view on that: people out of a certain class that are trying to get in contact only will do that when they think there is something to get for them...so: be carefull!! And the strange thing is, we are not used to spit on people just because they belong to a lower class, but after time, you're going to notice that you are doing exactly the same! Just because you're sick and tired of people who are trying to get in contact to benefit themselves, not because they like you that much. You'll start to think: Go away, I don't feel any need to talk with losers like you, or: Do I really have to talk with this dumbo? Not very respectfull, but it is exactly the same as they have in mind about you. They don't act like that, they act very respectfull. They accept behaviour from you what they would not ever accept from any Egyptian woman. Not because of respect, but because of the benefits they have in mind. I expect the whole western world will fall over me, with such opinions, but it really what I have expierenced. Most people I meet in Egypt I really don't want to know. Because they are not the ones they pretend to be. And they are thinking exactly the same about me...
Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
I just wish you loads of love and luck Mystic. I really hope i will see you back here again. i know it will take time. I do hope you will soon start to move on. It sounds like you are making a bit progress. I know for sure anyone that will have you in the future will be a very lucky man. hugs xxxxxxxxx
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I didnt give him money, he never would accept it from me and always got upset with me if i took money out of the bank to spend instead of asking him for money. He was very insistant that i not spend anything. Things do happen, i dont think all of this is what he intended from the start,, just with all the pressure of everything and her coming along, well the grass looked greener i think, its ok. he can go on, i dont need him. Some where out there is some one that actually deserves me,, i know that sounds soo conceited and i truly dont think i am better than anyone but i do know that i always give my best to everyone, but i do demand respect as well. I give many chances to them if i find i am not being respected, i state what i want, i compromise, but i guess some see it as being pushy. Yorkie can tell everyone how much i give and how much he was my life, i didnt do him wrong, so, if he feels he wants to go , then go, his loss, whatever.
Well, you gave him what then? Marriage, sex, companionship, hope of coming to America? What did he give you? Where was your respect? How did he show his intentions to you?
I really don't think giving respect until someone seems to not deserve it is the best thing, they earn it first and then you give it.
I must agree with what was said earlier, men really do gravitate to those who have more self-respect, who demand more and don't put up with any crap. I'm not talking about being kind and sweet, you can be those things and still stand up for yourself. It seems that while you DO SEEM TO BE a kind person, that you have a dilemma within yourself that tells you that you can't be strong and be kind, too. BULL.
God wants you to be good and kind, yes, but he also wants you stand up for yourself and demand that people treat you better. YOU REALLY DO TEACH PEOPLE HOW TO TREAT YOU. The very fact that you knew about his past and the things you were shown on ES about him prior to coming here anyway and marrying him and then sitting by while he purchased tickets for another girl and believed him...well I can't help but think this...why do you not like yourself? What is it about MH that you don't like? It really seems like you do things and make choices that hurt YOU. Of course he has his own responsibility in all of this, but if you chose to marry a man when all of those facts were put before you about him and then wanted to play the GOOD WIFE WHO CAN COMPROMISE AND BE KIND AND GIVE LOTS OF CHANCES...I must ask - what did he give you? Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by yorkshire rose: I really hope i will see you back here again.
I know you mean it good, Yorkie, I just hope she won't come to Egypt for a man next time.
Posted by CheezyPoof (Member # 8386) on :
So Happy-Theory of a Deadman
Put the bottle down, finally got somethin’ to say Take another look around and find someone else to play Needless to say .. That you’ve got problems There’s no fukin’ way .. that I’m gonna solve them It’s never the same .. every time you slip, then you fall down, down, down
Ever wonder what I been thinkin’ about? I been thinkin’ bout throwin’ you out
I’m so happy about you .. I’m fed up, so get up and get out I’m so happy now we’re through .. I’m fed up, so get up and get out I was so afraid, now you’re gone away Sent you packing, look who’s laughin’ now I’m so happy that I feel this way I’m so happy that I threw you away
Put your problems down and pick up what’s left of the pain Take a good look at yourself and see who’s really to blame Needless to say .. you got issues There’s no fukin’ way .. that I’m gonna fix you
It’s never the same .. ever since you went fallin’ down, down, down
Ever wonder what I been thinkin’ about? I been thinkin’ bout throwin’ you out
I’m so happy about you .. I’m fed up, so get up and get out I’m so happy now we’re through .. I’m fed up, so get up and get out I was so afraid, now you’re gone away Sent you packing, look who’s laughin’ now I’m so happy that I feel this way I’m so happy that I threw you away
I’m so happy about you .. I’m fed up, so get up and get out I’m so happy now we’re through .. I’m fed up, so get up and get out I was so afraid, now you’re gone away Sent you packing, look who’s laughin’ now I’m so happy that I feel this way I’m so happy that I threw you away
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart:
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI:
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: Alhamdulillah she has seen the light!!!!! I can see how some may be angry with her now, the 'we told you so' people, and I agree to a point but I think she knows that and knew that when she posted here. Fact is she didnt listen and learned for herself, im like that too, have to make my own mistakes. I love the idea about creating havoc on a tour, I have been spitting at Spring Tours buses for a while now anyway
Totally agree with you Ayisha, save for the fact that Mystic has now told us about the THIRD BAD MAN who has devastated her world IN A ROW, with TWO of the last ones being long-distance webcam relationships with Egyptians.
Where exactly has she "seen the light"? Because she's recognized this one is a jerk, finally?
That's not going to break her cycle.
I do need to clarify something in that as well. One of the 3 egyptian men i was with was not a bad man. No things didnt go perfectly , but , he was always honest with me at least. No, not Momen. But, that one was a very good man. He just changed from wanting marriage and to live here with me 5 years ago , to not wanting to live in the states. With him, I understand his reasons and for a time i fooled myself into thinking that i could do just the visits and be ok with no marriage. Over time i just wanted more and he couldnt offer more. He was and still is my best friend. I left him behind and didnt speak to him for more than a year now out of respect to my husband, however, he and I have started talking a while ago again. NO I AM NOT getting involved with him, he and I have been down that road now 3 times, we both care about each other greatly, but we know that at this point in our lives neither can give the other what we truly want, but we can however be wonderful close friends. He has been a huge huge help to me through all of this. As always, he has been the only person that knows just what to say to me to reach me and keep me sane. 2 were bad men, this one wasnt, just couldnt give me what i needed and wanted me there for him even though he knew he couldnt be what i needed.
We Dont really care!! I think you need to get past your perception that you need to explain your mess of a life to us. We are people on the Internet. You are turning away all the "real" people who could support you and turning to a bunch of faceless strangers on the Internet to give you "support". WTF is wrong with this picture??? You dont turn to your best friend Tiff, or your family??? You seriously have to see how phucked up that is somewhere inside you-you have issues with reality. BIG TIME ISSUES!!!
However, since you seem to have some kind of brain fart going on I will point something out to you. If this second (or 3rd or 4th whatever, cant keep track )was such a "nice" guy why did he let you make a mistake and marry momen?? Why didnt he come to "rescue" you???
Im gonna tell you why-because he was just like momen only you are now trying to build something in your mind . You forget that you came here and told us THE VERY SAME THING ABOUT HIM!! (Que violins) I cant leave my mom,blah blah blah. You are so good at fooling yourself it really is unbelievable to watch. Christ, I know more about your life than I do my best friend, sisters and the woman who lives below me and I've never set eyes on you in my life. Never had a nice chit chat or girl talk. Don't you see something wrong with this?????
Face the facts-the other one is just as momen. They both just found a better meal ticket or maybe they just realized that your an emotional trainwreck. I had promised myself I wouldnt post anything in your narcissistic thread, so I guess Im just as guilty as your bunch of internet friends who encouraged you to "follow your heart" and Who defended your foolish decision even when proof that he was a player was put right in front of you.Anyone with any self preservation and self respect would have beat feet in the other direction as fast as their boots could take them!!!
So Just knock it off already,your play for sympathy is starting to wear real thin. GO TO A THERAPIST FOR CHRIST'S SAKE!!!!
Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart:
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI:
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: Alhamdulillah she has seen the light!!!!! I can see how some may be angry with her now, the 'we told you so' people, and I agree to a point but I think she knows that and knew that when she posted here. Fact is she didnt listen and learned for herself, im like that too, have to make my own mistakes. I love the idea about creating havoc on a tour, I have been spitting at Spring Tours buses for a while now anyway
Totally agree with you Ayisha, save for the fact that Mystic has now told us about the THIRD BAD MAN who has devastated her world IN A ROW, with TWO of the last ones being long-distance webcam relationships with Egyptians.
Where exactly has she "seen the light"? Because she's recognized this one is a jerk, finally?
That's not going to break her cycle.
I do need to clarify something in that as well. One of the 3 egyptian men i was with was not a bad man. No things didnt go perfectly , but , he was always honest with me at least. No, not Momen. But, that one was a very good man. He just changed from wanting marriage and to live here with me 5 years ago , to not wanting to live in the states. With him, I understand his reasons and for a time i fooled myself into thinking that i could do just the visits and be ok with no marriage. Over time i just wanted more and he couldnt offer more. He was and still is my best friend. I left him behind and didnt speak to him for more than a year now out of respect to my husband, however, he and I have started talking a while ago again. NO I AM NOT getting involved with him, he and I have been down that road now 3 times, we both care about each other greatly, but we know that at this point in our lives neither can give the other what we truly want, but we can however be wonderful close friends. He has been a huge huge help to me through all of this. As always, he has been the only person that knows just what to say to me to reach me and keep me sane. 2 were bad men, this one wasnt, just couldnt give me what i needed and wanted me there for him even though he knew he couldnt be what i needed.
We Dont really care!! I think you need to get past your perception that you need to explain your mess of a life to us. We are people on the Internet. You are turning away all the "real" people who could support you and turning to a bunch of faceless strangers on the Internet to give you "support". WTF is wrong with this picture??? You dont turn to your best friend Tiff, or your family??? You seriously have to see how phucked up that is somewhere inside you-you have issues with reality. BIG TIME ISSUES!!!
However, since you seem to have some kind of brain fart going on I will point something out to you. If this second (or 3rd or 4th whatever, cant keep track )was such a "nice" guy why did he let you make a mistake and marry momen?? Why didnt he come to "rescue" you???
Im gonna tell you why-because he was just like momen only you are now trying to build something in your mind . You forget that you came here and told us THE VERY SAME THING ABOUT HIM!! (Que violins) I cant leave my mom,blah blah blah. You are so good at fooling yourself it really is unbelievable to watch. Christ, I know more about your life than I do my best friend, sisters and the woman who lives below me and I've never set eyes on you in my life. Never had a nice chit chat or girl talk. Don't you see something wrong with this?????
Face the facts-the other one is just as momen. They both just found a better meal ticket or maybe they just realized that your an emotional trainwreck. I had promised myself I wouldnt post anything in your narcissistic thread, so I guess Im just as guilty as your bunch of internet friends who encouraged you to "follow your heart" and Who defended your foolish decision even when proof that he was a player was put right in front of you.Anyone with any self preservation and self respect would have beat feet in the other direction as fast as their boots could take them!!!
So Just knock it off already,your play for sympathy is starting to wear real thin. GO TO A THERAPIST FOR CHRIST'S SAKE!!!!
::high five::
its alllll true. information overload over the internet - turn off your computer and get involved with whats really going on.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I dont want sympathy. My putting this here was first step to healing and getting this out of my system. Sure i find some support but most times i know that alot of people will come down on me. Fact is that no one can do anything to help me really unless they truly understand me. I have that one person that knows. I turn away from the family and Tiff because they just overload me, they feed me negative thoughts and i cant breathe when i talk to them. Momen didnt plan on this, i know he loved me, perhaps not now, but he did. But that doesnt change the fact that what he did was cruel and soo soo wrong. He should have ended this if that is what he wanted long ago, not wait and keep me believing he would be here. It just shows that when under alot of pressure he turns and walks away. My not being the quiet wife that will just turn and look the other way and demanding that i be known to EVERYONE that he talks to not just his family and the people he works with is what caused this, i pushed him, i cornered him. No its not my fault, he shouldnt have been talking to these people in the first place if they had interest in him or he them when he is married, in the very least it should have been made clear to them that he is married and unavailable but he didnt, he likes the attention, and well, yes i paid the price for it but in the long run, he is the one that looses. He lost more than just me.
Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I dont want sympathy. My putting this here was first step to healing and getting this out of my system. Sure i find some support but most times i know that alot of people will come down on me. Fact is that no one can do anything to help me really unless they truly understand me. I have that one person that knows. I turn away from the family and Tiff because they just overload me, they feed me negative thoughts and i cant breathe when i talk to them. Momen didnt plan on this, i know he loved me, perhaps not now, but he did. But that doesnt change the fact that what he did was cruel and soo soo wrong. He should have ended this if that is what he wanted long ago, not wait and keep me believing he would be here. It just shows that when under alot of pressure he turns and walks away. My not being the quiet wife that will just turn and look the other way and demanding that i be known to EVERYONE that he talks to not just his family and the people he works with is what caused this, i pushed him, i cornered him. No its not my fault, he shouldnt have been talking to these people in the first place if they had interest in him or he them when he is married, in the very least it should have been made clear to them that he is married and unavailable but he didnt, he likes the attention, and well, yes i paid the price for it but in the long run, he is the one that looses. He lost more than just me.
Hi Mystic, I think the point people are trying to make is that- by you expressing all of your emotions and thoughts online about this situation- you're just running away from reality. If you family or friends feed you negative thoughts- maybe you should listen. Just because you don't want to hear something doesnt mean that its not right.
Its like the people on this website who encouraged you to enter into such a serious, and quick relationship with Momen- even though it was VERY obvious that he was a loser, a leech, and that he was just looking to mess around. And hes doing the same thing now,hes still a leech, he was from day one. He didnt CHANGE.Don't try and justify your relationship with him- don't try and justify HIM- he sucks. He sucked from the beginning.
I think it would be better for you to take comfort in your family and in your friends. To go out and live! Forget about ES. You shouldn't even be talkig to Half the people on here who encouraged you to enter your relationship as haphazardly as you did. It was irresponsible, naive, and stupid, quite honestly- not just on your part.
Maybe it hurts to hear these things, but sometimes we just need a good slap in the face to wake us up!
Don't come on here seeking advice or comfort from these same people!
You must have other friends you can speak to. Honestly- if I were you- I'd make a date with a girlfriend. Go get coffee, or lunch, or watch a movie. Become more social. Its a type of healing in itself.
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
"Maybe it hurts to hear these things, but sometimes we just need a good slap in the face to wake us up!"
Exactly. Hurts but helps.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<information overload over the internet >
TMI:Too Much Information Syndrome Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote: Momen didnt plan on this, i know he loved me, perhaps not now, but he did.
I have some ocean front property in Nebraska I would love to sell you.
Posted by DawnBev08 (Member # 14964) on :
I know its really none of my business and yes I dont know him or you personally - but are you SURE he ever loved you??!?!?! Doesnt sound like it ............
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
This thread is not getting any better.
Posted by BIC RUNGA ROXX (Member # 14666) on :
OMG...i hope there wouldn`t be another round.. Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
quote:Originally posted by BIC RUNGA ROXX: OMG...i hope there wouldn`t be another round..
Posted by DawnBev08 (Member # 14964) on :
why are some women so desperate for a relationship / husband / whatever, that they will put up with anything?
dont get it Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I really think MH you should find out what REAL love is...it's a hellofva lot better than what you have been settling for. I don't know what you have been settling for, but someone saying they love you is a lot different from seeing ACTIONS of someone loving you. In the end, you've just gotta love yourself and stop worrying IF he will ever or did ever love you. I will tell you, NO he never loved you...if you take that personally you shouldn't. It should help you to let go, knowing that you are letting go of something that never really WAS. IF he loved you he wouldn't have led you on, he wouldn't have schmoozed up to your kids (gag), he wouldn't have let you go around telling EVERYONE, friends, family, kids, people online that he was coming and then not blink an eye at letting you think mommy wants him to stay while he's shacking up with Ms. California. Honey, open your eyes. His mom never knew you were married, he never would have been a good husband anyway, and in the end, you should cut your losses and find how to love YOURSELF...it's much stronger and you can always depend on it. Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
"His mom never knew you were married" I asked that question she said here she did ,the story changes i would say to her get yourself together have a rest and find a good old fashioned American if your muslim i know there are some wonderful texan men looking for a lovely american muslim lady .But first take a good year or two out and then if your up to it stay on own grown turf . Good luck .
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
"His mom never knew you were married" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Of course we don't know, but knowing the culture a bit, I assume this men is telling a lot of tales to his family. Somebody ever been by negotiations concerning marriages and break-ups between two families? I can assure this, it's not a case of saying "I devorce you" and the family agrees... It's more drama as an opera, and it certainly takes more time! In fact it's a stageplay with many characters, with anger, impressing, provoking, tricks, hypocricy, doublefacedness, and all under the protectance from God almighty...
Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
From one woman to another woman do you think it was wise to air it here .
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Dear Mystic!!
Good of you to continue to write in...
Here are two questions for you -
1) HOW and why do your friend and family give you 'bad thoughts'?? What do they say exactly to make you feel it is negative input for you??
2) ARE you going to get therapy now?? Simple yes or no will suffice as an answer...
Actually, I already know the answers (wanna bet?? I can write it down now already, so you know I won't make it up later) to both questions, but it would be enlightening to hear it from you....
Nonetheless, take care of you!! Love, Bubble
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Hi Tiger!!
quote:
This thread is not getting any better. -------------------------------------------------
This is not about the thread getting better - though IT IS 'getting better', since to the clear cut point now, instead of sympathetic meaninglessness - but MYSTIC getting better, ie. taking the chance now to sort out her life...
If you want to believe this will be best achieved if we all say 'oh, boohoo, sadsadsad, but Neverland is a real good place to be, carry on' - hmm, better scrap the second part of this sentence...
You mean well, but that is neither appropriate nor appreciated by the recipient, me thinks.
Best to you, Bubble
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
I think MH is on a lose-lose here. Some are telling her to stop posting her dramas and others are asking her questions and want to hear from her.
I really think we should leave her be now and let this thread go.
Hopefully she will get the help and support she needs elsewhere.
Take care all Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
happybunny, i think the questions that are being asked are about her welfare, her seeking help, her her her. what she posts about is him him him.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
For Mystic posting here and getting different comments and points of view IS therapy of a kind, not professional I know but it is therapy. Before professional people came along people with problems would talk to friends about it and hopefuly have enough friends with different thoughts and opinions to help them sort themselves out, a bit like writing something down making you feel better, a letter to a dead relative getting out what you never had time to say.
She is taking in all sides of whats said and its working away inside her head and inshaAllah some will bed in and grow as i think it has been doing. I think everything said here has great merit, all sides, all opinions, all ways of 'snapping her out of it', its all having some effect and something will work.
Posted by ***** (Member # 14677) on :
Whatever happened 2 once bitten twice shy??? Happens once, no biggie, happens twice, biggie, happens three times, time to call the men in white cloaks!!!!!! This on going saga is soapie. Some people just never learn, they enjoy hitting their heads against a brick wall. This reads more like a fairy tale with a lot of spin, lol, a few presidents could use a spin dr like this one, who knows if this story is true or not, I find it hard to believe, I think it is an attention seeking exercise
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
I understand what you mean but when i read things like "why did you post this" on one post and then on another "why don't you talk to us" i just think she can't win.
I personally think she is in denial about him and hopefully you are right Ayisha and she takes these comments as a kind of therapy.
Maybe its just me i would hate all this
Take care all Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Hi dear Mystic, again..
So sorry, but I simply can't jump over these plainly unrealistic, dreamland statements of yours -
quote: but i do demand respect as well.
quote: Oooh, muwhhhahahaha, excuse me while I have the laugh of the day... WHEN exactly is that then??
I give many chances to them if i find i am not being respected
quote: And just how long did it take for you IN ANY of these relationships to find you are not respected, and what - how much hurt - did it take?? What did you do as a result?? Get help, learn how to respect yourself, and get same from others in HEALTHY relationships?? Or instantenously you were off looking for a new knight in shining armour to fight your battles and make it aaaall good??
, i state what i want, i compromise, but i guess some see it as being pushy
PUSHY??? Pushy??? YOU, the 'Let me adore any man who comes my way giving me time of day, who cares he's an utter waste of time, I need to devote myself to a man' lady claims to be 'pushy' with the subject of adoration... (Now here I cry, this self-delusion is just too much!!). NEEDY I can see full well - incidentally, never anything better to chase any man away!! - but pushy?? What's more, with one of your beloveds, you'd have us believe?? Unfortunately, only thing I can see you getting 'pushy' over is if someone wanted to physically drag you to a doctor - 'Noooo, I do not need to go, all is well, all is well, stomp my foot, next one will make roses bloom, the sun shine and violins play forevermore'....
Mystic, I know that sounds really hard and you will not like it - but think about it!!! There is SUCH an obvious discrepancy between your VIEW of yourself / how you would like to be, and THE WAY YOU ARE (proven through your actions), it's pitiful - and as long as this image of yourself and reality do not meet somewhere, you will continue to have serious problems. Haven't you had ENOUGH ALREADY in your life???
Sincerely hoping you feel better, and rational, too, soon!! Hugs and best wishes, Bubble
PS. Now MY comments appear as quotes, not yours... How does one do this??
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Well, partly that's the price a person pays for too hasty decisions, without enough thought of the consequences. We all make mistakes, no one is immune - we learn this way - but sometimes you have to think more than twice - especially if children come into play.
One more thing, self-deception is a grave enemy - it's not only time-consuming, but also fruitless. What this man might think in the future (read: regret) is up to the stars. I used to waste lots of my precious time myself in the past. Damn.
Posted by Sparkle16 (Member # 13047) on :
This is my last comment because I don't think Mystic is even listening to us. She is just waiting for another loser to come along that "deserves her". I am getting mad now and this will probably be mean. No man would want you Mystic!! You could very well spend the rest of your life without a man!! What do you think about that! If it sends shockwaves through your system, then you need to decide "how much do I want a relationship (a good one) and work on being the type of person that a good man would love!!! That means being a separate person with your own interests, life perspectives and who VALUES HERSELF. Do you get this at all, if you don't please don't waste anymore airtime on your problems. It really is too much!!
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Be strong!!!!!!
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Yo, Sparkle!!
Patience, patience, hopefully in due time... It is, after all, quite something to happen and to take in and get over - this all coupled with breaking the (self-destructive) habits of a lifetime does not happen overnight, never mind just how deliriously happy that would make many of us... AND make Mystic happy, too, ultimately...
As for the next loser (oops, knight) this is what Mystic said 5 days ago -
quote:I do know he has condemned me to life alone by walking away. Where i live there are no muslim men, no single ones at all, the women often talk of the fact there is no one to marry, unless you bring them from outside, and I cant move from this area, kids have to come first and right now, they have both me and their father in their lives pretty much daily cause we live around the same area. I know no one will want to move here to be with me.
Phew, relief, goodie, goodie, goodie - no immediate real life danger then...
And though you, dear Mystic, finished that statement with 'I can't think of anyone else anyway', as I commented some days ago already, it is MOST ALARMING that you even had those thoughts so immediately after the break, in fact, once you had not even yet acknowledged to yourself that there was indeed a break for good - once again, it shows your ole, trusted pattern of getting on with the search again...
Which is just about the LAST thing on earth you need right now, how many more failures do you want before you see that this UNRESOLVED way of hopping from one to the next is NOOOOOT working and will never do so?? So PLEASE stay away from all charmers on the net!!
Whether 'therapy in a way' as our dear Ayisha says, or perhaps a 'holding up the mirror' so flaws in thinking can be seen, some of it here is surely taking hold in small steps...
Aside from that, I have to agree with the essence of your post, dear Sparkle!! So you see, Mystic - you want a GOOD man one day, SORT YOURSELF OUT!!!
Goodnight now, everyone, Bubble
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
His family did know we were married. His sister and i talked quite alot. They also know he has left me of course, and other details that i havent shared with all of you here. That i am not saying because of a bit of old fashioned superstition. No the bit is not something that is particularly good news, and is the reason he suddenly wants nothing to do with me any further, again running from his responsibilities is what he is best at. Anyway, I am ok, no, at the moment i am not looking to get involved. I am in the process of letting go and given my circumstances i cant just go and get involved anyway. I am starting to branch out a bit and try to find friends here in the states to get to know for the future. But as for being with anyone, no. I just cant trust and am really not in a hurry.
Posted by elizabethN (Member # 14096) on :
the fact of the matter is you were played. All he talked about was getting his visa to my husband and I talked to you about that. He is probibly on his way or here in the U.S. right now. Khairy says he will not stay in egypt one minute after receiving his visa. He has the money and works with travel agents. People need to pay attention to the red flags and not ignore them because the outcome is you will be hurt.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
He turned down the visa, that has been verified.And if it hadnt been the case, I would have contacted homeland security to have him blocked at entry.
Posted by elizabethN (Member # 14096) on :
good he is a real dirt bag and what comes around goes around.
Posted by elizabethN (Member # 14096) on :
I know how much you cared about him and I am so sorry for your hurt. These relationships are not easy and please take my advice and find a american man when you are healed.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
no thank you, i do not want any part of american men. married one for 13 years, dated 4 others, no way. When i am ready, my concentration will be through muslim dating sites, asian or middle eastern, Allah will guide me to what i need. I already belong to muslim friend sites and have began talking with people to be friends and keep studying and learning Islam.. perhaps in time things will work out there. But I cant get involved for several more months anyway so there is time for whatever that will happen to happen
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
You've already started to begin talking on muslim friend sites and you rely on Allah's guidance? That same Allah gave you brains, and he gave them to use them. What has happened, and also what will happen, is not because of incha-allah, you did it yourself! You made the wrong decisions, over and over again. There is not any God who did this to you, only you. And also only you are the one who can change this, if you want. It's nonsence to place this to the influence of God's. It should be better if you'd threw away your pc for a while, instead of making friends and talk about your expierences on whatever kind of sites. Just throw it away, look at your children and tell yourself that it's about time they get a responsable mother, who is giving them good examples about life and relationships, put your efforts in them instead as in a keyboard. Go to your family, because they are the ones who really care, even if you think they sound negative. Of course they sound negative, they see what is happening! You think you are a good mother, by stepping from one abusive relationship into the other and explain it as Allah's wish? The world must look completely upside down and twisted to your daughter. That friendly man she met on webcam now has made me mummy extremely sad, so the man was not who he seemed to be.... And it was not the first one!!! What kind of trust will she ever have in men? What kind of trust will she ever feel in mummy? What kind of trust will she ever feel in religion? You are the one who is taking away her trust, Mystic, by your actions, it is not Allah! You are making a mess of your life, and of your childrens life, and they are the ones who are always near to you...
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: no thank you, i do not want any part of american men. married one for 13 years, dated 4 others, no way. When i am ready, my concentration will be through muslim dating sites, asian or middle eastern, Allah will guide me to what i need. I already belong to muslim friend sites and have began talking with people to be friends and keep studying and learning Islam.. perhaps in time things will work out there. But I cant get involved for several more months anyway so there is time for whatever that will happen to happen
mystic, I know I am pointing out the obvious. You criticize American men but how has your relationships with Muslim men been going?
I would like to suggest that you take several years, not months before beginning a new relationship. Sounds to me like you need to find yourself rather than have a man define you.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Guys, this is leading nowhere. I am hopeful mystic got all your opinions now she really needs to work through everything. You know you can give only so much advise.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: His family did know we were married. His sister and i talked quite alot. They also know he has left me of course, and other details that i havent shared with all of you here. That i am not saying because of a bit of old fashioned superstition. No the bit is not something that is particularly good news, and is the reason he suddenly wants nothing to do with me any further, again running from his responsibilities is what he is best at. Anyway, I am ok, no, at the moment i am not looking to get involved. I am in the process of letting go and given my circumstances i cant just go and get involved anyway. I am starting to branch out a bit and try to find friends here in the states to get to know for the future. But as for being with anyone, no. I just cant trust and am really not in a hurry.
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: no thank you, i do not want any part of american men. married one for 13 years, dated 4 others, no way. When i am ready, my concentration will be through muslim dating sites, asian or middle eastern, Allah will guide me to what i need. I already belong to muslim friend sites and have began talking with people to be friends and keep studying and learning Islam.. perhaps in time things will work out there. But I cant get involved for several more months anyway so there is time for whatever that will happen to happen
Mystic, please say you're not what I think you are Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I don't get it, what do you think she is saying? Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Ayisha, I hope she's not either.... - not under these circumstances. Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Ye Gods above!!!! Oooh, Ayisha, same thought... But when could that have happened, surely there is no such thing as webcam pregnancy????? Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, pleeeeeeeeeeease say you are not, dear Mystic...
On-the-floor-Bubble-in-shock-and-finally-speechless
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Its quite common for women to think, almost hope they are when a relationship breaks up and they are not wanting to let go.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I can't figure out if this keeps getting better...or worse! Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
I will say one thing, Only Mystic can get 8 pages every time, EVERYONE is interested, even those who say 'stop writing here' Lets just hope she has a happy ending and we can try to make that 10 pages
ES needs Mystic as much as she needs us, personally I am glad she has come on here and braved all this, she cant be that weak, AND inshaAllah she will continue to talk it through, better to talk it all out with virtual strangers than bottle it up.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bubblesperson: Ye Gods above!!!! Oooh, Ayisha, same thought... But when could that have happened, surely there is no such thing as webcam pregnancy????? Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, pleeeeeeeeeeease say you are not, dear Mystic...
maybe she looked at a pregnant woman. I saw one the other day so I looked, will let you know if it worked Posted by citizen (Member # 1344) on :
^^^ it's true we can't resist mystic. I always say the same thing:
*** YOU DON'T NEED A MAN ***
but it always falls on deaf ears. she's already looking or planning where to look.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Come on, if it's indeed true then it's not the right moment for jokes here!!
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
But its unrealistic to expect someone who has gone from one relationship to another to go cold turkey for years while she tries being on her own. I know that is good advice to help her find herself, but it IS a natural human instinct to seek out a companion, better that she finds friends to talk to, or even some male attention if thats what she wants, but just keeps away from something serious or committed for the time being IMO.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Okay, I will stop writing in this topic, it has no use. I got a bit angry about the fatalistic attitude as it all has been God's wish, and the trying to excape on this by visiting muslim friends sites, I considered it as aking for problems. Enough for me, everybody is free to live the life in the way they want to, and this also means it's ouw own responsability. Finito.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by ?????: Okay, I will stop writing in this topic, it has no use. I got a bit angry about the fatalistic attitude as it all has been God's wish, and the trying to excape on this by visiting muslim friends sites, I considered it as aking for problems.
I agree. God's wish isn't for us to throw ourselves under a bus and then blame him when we end up crippled. Posted by citizen (Member # 1344) on :
I agree it's a human instinct, but it's also a human instinct to put kids number one till they're independent.
Having a companion is lovely, but to take ANY companion rather than be without is a recipe for disaster.
The old Egyptian saying 'It's better to live in the shadow of a man than a wall' which is used to persuade women to accept ANY man as they grow older, applies pretty well to Mystic.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Mystic, what will you do IF YOU ARE pregnant? Do you have any idea how this is going to impact your children!?? I can't believe you wouldn't have used birth control when you got married (and after!)....you were banking on him getting the VISA for sure, but what if he never did and you STILL ended up pregnant!? You couldn't go to Egypt to live because of your children from another daddy, and he couldn't be there. I never thought I would say this but...OY VEY !! Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Yes I agree Citizen, you should not settle for anyone, and you should put your kids first and enjoy every moment before they grow up and fly away
Smuckers you are right also, We still have free will, we still have tests, we either pass or fail them Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
I think we should wait if mystic is confirming our thoughts or not.
But mystic let me tell you one thing: You will have a very hard time finding a Muslim man who will accept you have already children with another man or even men. Not inside the US. Abroad yes but this always brings up the question if he's honest in his intentions.
I will tell you again find a good American man - regardless of his religion - in YOUR AREA who will love, treat and support you and the children just the way you wish. I am not telling you find one now but down the road - right now you have to work through some other things first.
Wishing you all the best.
Posted by Exiled (Member # 14410) on :
Enta eih mosh kfaya aalaik what are you (how cruel are you) Is it not enough Tegrahni haram aalaik enta eeih That you hurt me? Have pity. How cruel are you? Enta laih dimooai habeebi tehoun aalaik Why my love, is it so easy for you to bring me to tears Tab w laih ana radya enak tegrahni w roohi feek And why do I accept that you hurt me when my soul is part of you Tab w laih yaani eih radya beaazabi bain edaik And why am I accepting this torment at your hands?
Law kan da hob ya waili mino If this is love, my misery is from it W law kan da zanbi matoub aano And if I am to blame, I cannot say never again Law kan naseebi aaeesh fey gerah And if it is my lot to live in torment Hayaeesh fey gerah I shall live in torment
Mesh haram mesh haram enak tekhdaani fey hobi leek Have you no pity? Have you no shame that YOU CHEAT ME knowing the love I have for you Mesh haram elgharam wel seneen hayati w 3ashi eleek Is it not a shame, the passion and the years and longing that I am living for you? Daa awam wala kan leaaba fey hayatak yetdaweek Was the love lost completely? Or has it been a game Daa awam el hanan w hodni albi w amali feek Was the love and tenderness and my heart and faith in you all lost?
Law kan da hob ya waili mino If this is love, my misery is from it W law kan da zanbi matoub aano And if I am to blame, I cannot say never again Law kan naseebi aaeesh fey gerah And if it is my lot to live in torment Hayaeesh fey gerah I shall live in torment
P.S This particular translation is actually awful but better than nothing.
P.P.S having read it again it is actually not bad at all and very suitable lyrical wise
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
THE FEMALE OF THE SPECIES IS MORE DEADLIER THAN THE MALE
A thousand thundering thrills await me Facing insurmontable odds gratefully The female of the species is more deadly than the male
Shock shock horror horror Shock shock horror I'll shout myself hoarse for your supernatural force The female of the species is more deadly than the male
Oh she deals in witchcraft And one kiss and I'm zapped
Oh How can heaven hold a place for me? When a girl like you has cast a spell on me Oh how can heaven hold a place for me? When a girl like you has cast a spell on me
Frankenstein and Dracula have nothing on you Jekyll and Hyde join the back of the queue The female of the species is more deadly than the male
Oh she wants to conquer the world completely But first she'll conquer me discreetly The female of the species is more deadly than the male
Oh she deals in witchcraft And one kiss and I'm zapped
Oh How can heaven hold a place for me? When a girl like you has cast a spell on me Oh how can heaven hold a place for me? When a girl like you has cast a spell on me
Posted by CheezyPoof (Member # 8386) on :
The title of this thread is making the song, Here I Go Again by Whitesnake, play in my head.
Posted by Exiled (Member # 14410) on :
quote:Originally posted by CheezyPoof: The title of this thread is making the song, Here I Go Again by Whitesnake, play in my head.
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Exiled, that is a very apt song!!! and video. But SERIOUSLY lacking in girl power, she just crys and whinges about the slime ball, rolling around in bed and sitting on the toilet floor feeling sorry for herself and her misery!! I was waiting for her to push him out of the speeding car, along with his harlet in the back!! I wanted to see this women cut up all his shirts (while he was wearing them) and leave him standing in the street with only his pants!! ok forget the pants, nothing, zilch, nada...then we would see how funny he thinks it is Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I can't figure out if this keeps getting better...or worse!
worse... I just hope it is not true... maybe she meant something like; the next months I need time to be on my own...
Posted by DawnBev08 (Member # 14964) on :
can you really put a time limit on how long it will take you to heal?
a few months is not long - I needed a few years!!
Posted by SherryBlueBerry (Member # 13867) on :
I hate to see this thread end It has been my lunch time "soap opera" on the net for the past few days.
Just a few words for MH...I have done the net thing...been to Egypt 3 times...left last time with broken heart..but time heals...and you will survive. Don't be so quick to fall back into another relationship!
I am in my 50's and have decided that living alone is much better than living with an a$$hole..whether he be Christian or Muslim, American or Egyptian...there are good and bad in all walks of life. Egyptian men are no different than American men....they all think with their "little" head instead of the one on their shoulders!
Ooooops no offense ES men ) Love you all...I am beginning to love this place.
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Dear Mystic!!
I am beginning to see why family and friends - other than the (now) wonderful Egyptian who 'knows you best and is soooo comforting', only engage in negative input...
If this IS true - and Mystic, you have a habit of coming out with more and more 'hints' at more and more details, which later turn out to be heavy facts, so I assume this is what you wanted to tell, but not tell directly, again true to form - (and don't deny it now because you will get HEAPS of flak...) - they are probably absolutely horrified and are asking things like
'How will you cope with this???? If nothing else, financially??? In your job you must be on your feet!! And what after, the older ones will take care of it while you work?? Think they will LIKE this?? Think they should?? How will they adjust to this??' -
but again we shall not get an answer to THESE questions, simply because what is IMPORTANT is noooot one little bit in your mind, instead life-and-death matters like internet friend sites and THE QUEST (as soon as you have delivered, you are ready to go seeking again) ARE...
Well, I suggest a mighty poor person from a terrible 3rd world country who accepts ANYTHING to get out, somewhere far more terrible than Egypt, perhaps an Indian Untouchable or so, there are not many more options left...
As Tiger says, any available Muslim man in right age group, good, honest, hard-working, will be hard pressed accepting aging woman not divorced yet with 4 children from 2 different fathers - come to think of it, MOST men will be hard pressed there, never mind all the other rubbish you bring with you that would make anyone hang garlic at the door and windows and put up crosses everywhere for protection from Madame Superneedy-not-quite-there...
(But then, that is only your comfort for now, and NOT the real plan, isn't it... Just a back-up of sorts..).
Ooooh, Mystic, I am still stunned and toooo shocked - tell me, HOW CAN ANY ONE PERSON GET HERSELF INTO SUCH A HOPELESSLY TOTALLY SORRY MESS?!?!?!? What's next, the STD that comes with his parting present???? And your head is STILL in the clouds????
Last chance, PLEASE give ONE sign that you have understood the seriousness of your veryveryvery dire situation, please say ONE realistic thing, not about HIM and not about men generally, BUT ABOUT WHAT IS HAPPENING!!!
Such as:
1) I do not believe you that the 'non-visa' has been verified. So quickly suddenly?? How?? Why did they suddenly answer you, when first they did not and the Embassy hardly ever does, plus you had hardly time to withdraw the sponsorship??? Sorry, you are making this up.. (No reason to withdraw, however, he will need it later on, right??).
2) WHEN is the divorce, where, and who is paying??? But then, no need for you to answer that, either - because there will not be a divorce (in your head). The next revelation will be that you shall fly over in due course to show loooving Granny and sil, who are sooo giving him grief so long for treating you sooo bad the cutie-cute child, then HE realises what he lost - this goooood wife, no, the best wife ever - he cries heartily and swears all has changed, you forgive, and all is hunky-dory again....
That IS!!!!!! what is in your air-filled head, right?? Deny it all you want, but Mystic, I am reading you like a book - why and how, I had the (mis)fortune of having other clients like you and know how you tick... (Besides, most anyone here will by now, too...). Oh man, oh man, oh man, I can see the next chapter so clearly, I shall puke any minute now, this is making me ILL ON YOUR BEHALF - sorry for that, dear all...
3) Again, the therapy question, are you doing it... Buuut, that won't be necessary, ca, because nothing is wrong with you, and all will be wonderful when the little bundle is only here and HE sees the light and YOU can feel soooo great, good, benevolent, gracious and forgiving with your pure, pure heart - and the little family is off on a new start..
Now let's see what unrelated (to the questions and situation), unrealistic drivvel comes back from you now - in the meantime *I* shall do some heavy breathing, I need it now...
On second thought, don't trouble yourself, that IS the story, the end. (And yes, Tiger, I am sooo mean..).
Just-about-controlling-myself-and-feeling-sick- Bubble
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Dont forget Bubble that this whole thread is more for his benefit than anyone elses, perhaps to clarify some unanswered questions and provoke him into reacting, I'm quite surprised he hasn't actually. Its not about healing IMO, its about wanting answers.
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
1) I do not believe you that the 'non-visa' has been verified. So quickly suddenly?? How?? Why did they suddenly answer you, when first they did not and the Embassy hardly ever does, plus you had hardly time to withdraw the sponsorship??? Sorry, you are making this up.. (No reason to withdraw, however, he will need it later on, right??).
bubble, i don't believe that either it took me 3 months for them to withdraw my fiancee' petition, long ago. they aren't that quick Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
wow. bubbles cracked. you know it's bad when one of the nicest posters on here finally cracks.
bubbles, step away from the mystic thread. enjoy easter and smile a lot. ;-)
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: and other details that i havent shared with all of you here. That i am not saying because of a bit of old fashioned superstition. No the bit is not something that is particularly good news, and is the reason he suddenly wants nothing to do with me any further, again running from his responsibilities is what he is best at.
are you pregnant?
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Is anyone else clicking refresh, or is it just me? Posted by Sic Luceat Lux (Member # 12020) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: no thank you, i do not want any part of american men. married one for 13 years, dated 4 others, no way.
Yeah, we American men are bad to the bone aren't we?
Though to be honest, I think you'll have problems with men regardless of where they're from.
~Alistair
Posted by Karah_Mia (Member # 4668) on :
She probably means iddah, not pregnancy you gossip vampires you! Posted by Caterpillar. (Member # 14977) on :
lets hope so Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by doodlebug:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: and other details that i havent shared with all of you here. That i am not saying because of a bit of old fashioned superstition. No the bit is not something that is particularly good news, and is the reason he suddenly wants nothing to do with me any further, again running from his responsibilities is what he is best at.
are you pregnant?
Posted by CheezyPoof (Member # 8386) on :
MH, you have bad luck with men...PERIOD.
I have an Egyptian husband but I gotta say...Egyptian and other Arab men are WAY more complicated than American men, generally speaking. There are good American men out there but you don't seem to attract good men...period. American or otherwise. You teach men how to treat you and it seems you've been teaching them that you're a doormat.
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: no thank you, i do not want any part of american men. married one for 13 years, dated 4 others, no way. When i am ready, my concentration will be through muslim dating sites, asian or middle eastern, Allah will guide me to what i need. I already belong to muslim friend sites and have began talking with people to be friends and keep studying and learning Islam.. perhaps in time things will work out there. But I cant get involved for several more months anyway so there is time for whatever that will happen to happen
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by doodlebug:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: and other details that i havent shared with all of you here. That i am not saying because of a bit of old fashioned superstition. No the bit is not something that is particularly good news, and is the reason he suddenly wants nothing to do with me any further, again running from his responsibilities is what he is best at.
are you pregnant?
OMG Really?!
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
quote:Originally posted by Karah_Mia: She probably means iddah, not pregnancy you gossip vampires you!
nuh uh...iddah does not make sense with the Old fashioned superstition that she mentioned which I take to mean not announcing pregnancy until the 4 month mark has passed....
but that's gossip and gossip is bad bad bad.
Posted by Karah_Mia (Member # 4668) on :
quote:Originally posted by doodlebug: [nuh uh...iddah does not make sense with the Old fashioned superstition that she mentioned which I take to mean not announcing pregnancy until the 4 month mark has passed....
but that's gossip and gossip is bad bad bad.
Good point! Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by CheezyPoof: MH, you have bad luck with men...PERIOD.
I have an Egyptian husband but I gotta say...Egyptian and other Arab men are WAY more complicated than American men, generally speaking. There are good American men out there but you don't seem to attract good men...period. American or otherwise. You teach men how to treat you and it seems you've been teaching them that you're a doormat.
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: no thank you, i do not want any part of american men. married one for 13 years, dated 4 others, no way. When i am ready, my concentration will be through muslim dating sites, asian or middle eastern, Allah will guide me to what i need. I already belong to muslim friend sites and have began talking with people to be friends and keep studying and learning Islam.. perhaps in time things will work out there. But I cant get involved for several more months anyway so there is time for whatever that will happen to happen
There is no such thing as 'bad luck with men', there is something like 'making mistakes'. Also this can happen to everyone, only when it turns out the wrong way over and over again, there is something wrong with the one who makes decisions!
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
I think maybe her picker is broken. Once she has a good year devoted to herself then her picker can heal and she'll pick better men, if any at all. For me, if God forbid something happens with my marriage I'm going to be a cat lady. I love cats. Fluffy ones. Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Hi, my darling Expat!!
Oooh, such a lovely compliment, thank you, thank you!!! May I return it, though your feelings are clear to be seen, you express yourself wonderfully controlled, kind and thoughtful...
As do a number of members here, dear Smucky and Ayisha in particular spring to mind, Rumiecrazy did great (but did not get through, neither did our Sparkle) - sorry to anyone I leave out, there have been so many (potentially) helpful posts... (Do you VALUE this at all, Mystic, just how strangers feel with and for you????).
And noooo, Hamdulile, I have not actually cracked yet (nearly, but not quite yet...). It is only that I cannot begin to fathom HOW this can keep getting so much worse and worse and yet worse still literally by the minute - AND ALL DELIBERATE!!!!! Yeah, people create messes in their lives, people make mistakes - and I have surely pulled out my hair in frustration at some clients before, but I have NEVER, repeat NEVER, in a good 20 years come across such absolute resistance to help coupled with COMPLETE LACK OF REALITY!!!
Because again - I am not trying to be conceited, or extra clever, but this is soooo classic, like a textbook case of worst scenarios - I shall bet any - and everything I have that what I wrote above is EXACTLY and down to the last dot on the i's what is going on in Mystic's head...
(Hey, let's open a betting shop - I say I am right to the tune of one million dollars, you all say 'No way!!' and I shall be soooooooooo obscenely rich in 6 /7 months when the Granny-baby meeting takes place in Cairo, or at least is supposed to take place, who knows whether doors will be opened... Okay, okay, I will share, promise...).
Which quite frankly means that WERE I NEAR YOU, dear Mystic, I'd have you committed now for your own good. AND PREDOMINANTLY that of your children. You know, those young people whom YOU gave birth to, who need to rely on you, who need you fullstop, but who are learning everything they should NOT from you as to behaviour, and who do not feature in ANYTHING, unless they have tears in their eyes due to HIM.
Most sadly, I am being perfectly serious - if once again my assumptions / predictions are correct, then you have most seriously and also - WITHOUT IMMEDIATE IN-PATIENT HELP, forget out-patient therapy, this has gone waaaaaay too far - pretty irrevocably lost the plot, hence are NOT FIT TO LOOK AFTER ANYONE, LET ALONE CHILDREN.
Please, I BEG YOU, I BESEECH YOU and I beg again - I know my opinion is the last thing that matters to you, but for the sake of all else reading and writing and feeling with you here, SAY ONE SENSIBLE, REALISTIC THING to prove that YOU KNOW WHAT IS IMPORTANT IN THIS SITUATION....
Thanks again, dear Expat, guess you are right and I must relax now... Never good - and definitely not professional - to get so emotional myself, but - oooooooh and aaaaaaargh, rending of garments and pulling hair, you know...
Hi, dear Doodle!!
Yes she is, yes she is, read between the lines and remember this is what Mystic does, hint, small new fact, hint, another tid-bit, people guess, ooh, you are right, I did not want to say, you made me, new fact, hint again..
Only whether she will CONFIRM this now still, in light of what is then to be expected as in ****-hits-fan-another-28-pages, remains to be seen - plus there is still that 'superstition' which does not allow women to talk about this for a while for fear of bringing on the evil eye or so - a bit like it is bad luck to congratulate BEFORE a birthday...
AND I have now been really mean and evil with my reading (long distance analysis, but boy!!! you make it easy) of her above - which is so off-putting to now admit the happy (ahem no - 'not particularly happy news that make him run from responsibility', so only fairly happy news)truth, but that is called 'mirroring' feelings/ ideas with the aim that person concerned can now SEE problems / flaws / mistakes in own thinking, and re-consider, hence I felt I had to do this as a soon-to-be last try - alas, no longer so much out of worry for Mystic only, but mainly those three, soon to be four, total innocents who never asked for any of this business...
Love to you both, dear ladies, NOW I am switching off and stepping away as instructed.. Bubble, The More-or-Less-Uncracked
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bubblesperson:
Hi, dear Doodle!!
Yes she is, yes she is, read between the lines and remember this is what Mystic does, hint, small new fact, hint, another tid-bit, people guess, ooh, you are right, I did not want to say, you made me, new fact, hint again.. [/QB]
Say it is NOT true! Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Quote: but I have NEVER, repeat NEVER, in a good 20 years come across such absolute resistance to help coupled with COMPLETE LACK OF REALITY!!!
You didn't??? Well, there are worser stories, with Egyptian AND Western women! Want to know what was amazing me most by this cases? The MEN. The men who are guilty on this, for themselves are also that twisted, that disturbed, and that unhappy by all what they caused. But, for silly reasons they don't show that to the outside world. They even acting as if they are proud of it: "I had one that far that she wanted to kill herself". "I had one that had to get hospitalised in a mental institution for 6 months", or "I had one that left the country because of me". And in the meanwhile they don't know what to do, how to solve all the problems, how to turn up the stories so at least they would look right... They have to turn themselves around in numerous circles, their lies are causing new lies, and in the end they believe it themselves. They are totally retards, they fell into their own traps of lying and cheating; to their women, to their families, to their friends, because nobody may know!!! They don't know what to do with their bastard-children, they are running from one coverup into the other coverup and get exhausted in the end. They are making exactly the same messes as the women are doing, so, it's a cycle! The best thing a woman can do is stay far away from these kind of men, but for reasons they don't! They are also cycling, from one bastard to another. I think there will always be a cycle of this kind of women and this kind of men. You can give them advice as much as you want, but you better talk to a wall, it will have the same effect: none. There is a religion where people believe you have to pass certain stages with problems in life. If you handle them right, you will get rewarded with a place in heaven. If not, you'll have to get rebirthed again, to try again. As long as it takes to make it all right. Maybe they are in that stage...
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Dear All!!
quote: quote: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Originally posted by Bubblesperson:
Hi, dear Doodle!!
Yes she is, yes she is, read between the lines and remember this is what Mystic does, hint, small new fact, hint, another tid-bit, people guess, ooh, you are right, I did not want to say, you made me, new fact, hint again.. [/QB] --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Say it is NOT true!
SORRY dear Desertgirl and everyone else... The above statement is MY take / reading / analysis of Mystic's statements - everything else I said to her also falls under analysis / predictions based thereon (which is rather different to gossiping). It would be tooooooo fantastic if I were wrong WITH ALL OF IT - buuuuuut - just give it time and all will be revealed, it WILL, because WE (and perhaps HIM reading of his shame, certain people hope) are THE NEEDED LIFE-LINE AUDIENCE...
BUT NOOOO, she has NOT actually put in words yet that she is pregnant, only hinted strongly at it...
(Which incidentally is the reason for no total collapse so far, why collapse when there is HOPE?!?). So for the moment please forget aaaaaall about it, other than YOU, MYSTIC, please y'all ignore my waffling, I was just having a last attempt... With the ole sledgehammer, yes, because the time for anything else is now GONE (since TIME TO SORT THINGS OUT is of the essence now).
NOW-definitely-stepping-away-Bubble
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Hi, sweet, patient Questionmarks!!!
(YOU are one I forgot in my list of 'good people'... Guess there are still many more, sorry again..).
quote:There is a religion where people believe you have to pass certain stages with problems in life. If you handle them right, you will get rewarded with a place in heaven. If not, you'll have to get rebirthed again, to try again. As long as it takes to make it all right. Maybe they are in that stage...
That's Buddhism - and yes, may be they are - just a damned shame that OTHERS, innocent by-standers so to speak, also have to suffer because of such people/ actions. ALL people have something not so pleasant to learn in a life, some more so than others...
TERRIBLE what you say about those men - and naturally you are right, that is tooooo sick and disturbed... WHAT a thing to brag about, unbelievable!!
And yes also, with women or men trapped in wishful thinking, Neverland etc it IS ever so hard to get through or to help - but the reason I said I never experienced THIS sort of thing (okay, it's on the net, so does not really count) is because of THE COMBINATION of actually ACTIVELY FIGHTING HELP (on here it is only ignoring it, but in real life, uuuh, guess we would see a tigress clawing anyone who said the word 'therapy') AND this shocking, complete loss of reality - the more is revealed, the more apparent THE DEPTH of this reality loss becomes (so I have gone from recommending therapy to in-patient protective treatment), and whether I was just lucky so far or not, one of the two alone is one thing (and this I have all the time, naturally) but BOTH THESE FACTORS TOGETHER AND THIS SO STRONGLY...
Time to throw in the towel any minute nownownow - as some others wisely saw long ago - but see, Mystic, I am not sure myself WHY (I have asked myself this more than once), your story just really soooo touched me from the beginning last year already (as it did others), I felt such genuine empathy and GREAT worry for you, and sincerely wanted to help in any way possible.
THAT's why I have been on your back so much - it is TRAGIC BEYOND TRAGIC what you make of your life AND THAT OF YOUR POOR CHILDREN. But as long as YOU don't see that, nothing more to be said, I suppose...
Love to you, dear ???, I AM going now!!! Bubble
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Mystic, why you are doing this to yourself? Why this thread? Why you present us with every little detail of your failed relationship? Why do you want to humilate yourself further? This is very very personal stuff, mystic, and doesn't belong on a public forum IMHO. This thread is nothing but a human tragedy. Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
ROFL
...sorry I can't help it. Everyone has run wild with this thread, and now the rumor is that she is pregnant.
What a soap opera... Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by CheezyPoof: MH, you have bad luck with men...PERIOD.
I have an Egyptian husband but I gotta say...Egyptian and other Arab men are WAY more complicated than American men, generally speaking. There are good American men out there but you don't seem to attract good men...period. American or otherwise. You teach men how to treat you and it seems you've been teaching them that you're a doormat.
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: no thank you, i do not want any part of american men. married one for 13 years, dated 4 others, no way. When i am ready, my concentration will be through muslim dating sites, asian or middle eastern, Allah will guide me to what i need. I already belong to muslim friend sites and have began talking with people to be friends and keep studying and learning Islam.. perhaps in time things will work out there. But I cant get involved for several more months anyway so there is time for whatever that will happen to happen
That pretty much sums it up.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bubblesperson: Hi, sweet, patient Questionmarks!!!
(YOU are one I forgot in my list of 'good people'... Guess there are still many more, sorry again..).
quote:There is a religion where people believe you have to pass certain stages with problems in life. If you handle them right, you will get rewarded with a place in heaven. If not, you'll have to get rebirthed again, to try again. As long as it takes to make it all right. Maybe they are in that stage...
That's Buddhism - and yes, may be they are - just a damned shame that OTHERS, innocent by-standers so to speak, also have to suffer because of such people/ actions. ALL people have something not so pleasant to learn in a life, some more so than others...
TERRIBLE what you say about those men - and naturally you are right, that is tooooo sick and disturbed... WHAT a thing to brag about, unbelievable!!
And yes also, with women or men trapped in wishful thinking, Neverland etc it IS ever so hard to get through or to help - but the reason I said I never experienced THIS sort of thing (okay, it's on the net, so does not really count) is because of THE COMBINATION of actually ACTIVELY FIGHTING HELP (on here it is only ignoring it, but in real life, uuuh, guess we would see a tigress clawing anyone who said the word 'therapy') AND this shocking, complete loss of reality - the more is revealed, the more apparent THE DEPTH of this reality loss becomes (so I have gone from recommending therapy to in-patient protective treatment), and whether I was just lucky so far or not, one of the two alone is one thing (and this I have all the time, naturally) but BOTH THESE FACTORS TOGETHER AND THIS SO STRONGLY...
Time to throw in the towel any minute nownownow - as some others wisely saw long ago - but see, Mystic, I am not sure myself WHY (I have asked myself this more than once), your story just really soooo touched me from the beginning last year already (as it did others), I felt such genuine empathy and GREAT worry for you, and sincerely wanted to help in any way possible.
THAT's why I have been on your back so much - it is TRAGIC BEYOND TRAGIC what you make of your life AND THAT OF YOUR POOR CHILDREN. But as long as YOU don't see that, nothing more to be said, I suppose...
Love to you, dear ???, I AM going now!!! Bubble
Almaz named it 'denial'. The women are all in denial. With the right immediate back-up and support near to them, this could change into 'awareness'. But what if they are turned away because it is considered as 'negativism'? What if when every person with awareness is walking into the wall that they build around themselves? Then nobody is able to reach them... Then you'll get the selfdestructing people where we are talking about. In fact they should be ready for treatment by force. Because they are a danger to themselves and a danger to their children. What should have become of us, when our mothers stepped from one abusive relationship into the other? We should consider abusement as something that is incha-allah: bad, but part of life! While it isn't, because they are doing it to themselves! And MH? I think she will fee touched by our concernedness, but by the first sweet words of compassion, spoken by whomever & where-ever, he will be the good man again, and everything what he has done wrong in his life, is covered up because it was explained ( also a skill, talk good what's wrong) and there she goes again.... Buddhists are very patiënt people. They know what can happen in life, and they accept all. Some just need more time....another life....another chance....
Posted by Kleobatra (Member # 14882) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: ROFL
...sorry I can't help it. Everyone has run wild with this thread, and now the rumor is that she is pregnant.
What a soap opera...
The main reason I’m addicted to this message board is the real life soap opera aspect of it. With cliff hangers and all. Reading this topic I’m hoping this isn’t real, but sprung out of a vivid imagination. If it’s real, I can only feel deeply sorry for MH and especially for her children.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
You're not hoping it isn't for real, Kleobatra! Admit it, you want more juicy details! About what he said, what he did next, how his family reacted etc.... And you are knowing a whole lot more about Egyptian culture as only two holidays with a friend who fell for an also bad Egyptian! Feeling sorry for her and in the meantime it is great amusement: how people can act this stupid... Well, if you are really part of the culture you will know it all and more. People can be a whole lot more stupid as what we are reading here. Just go on like you are doing now, and you will discover...
Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
My gosh! Go away for a day and look what I've missed. . .possible pregnancy now? I guess I shouldn't be surprised because MH talked about wanting a baby with Momen shortly after she announced their impending engagement.
I'm also curious why you think your best friend and family are overloading you, MH? Someone already has mentioned it and posed the question but so far no answer. I can see why you think they are being negative when they've probably been telling you how screwed up the idea of marrying this guy was, you did it anyway, and now you are suffering from such extreme depression that they are concerned for the well-being of not only yourself but of your children. I can't believe someone hasn't called Child Protective Services yet and had your children removed until you get yourself together.
Very, very sad situation all around.
Posted by Kleobatra (Member # 14882) on :
quote:Originally posted by ?????: You're not hoping it isn't for real, Kleobatra! Admit it, you want more juicy details! About what he said, what he did next, how his family reacted etc.... And you are knowing a whole lot more about Egyptian culture as only two holidays with a friend who fell for an also bad Egyptian! Feeling sorry for her and in the meantime it is great amusement: how people can act this stupid... Well, if you are really part of the culture you will know it all and more. People can be a whole lot more stupid as what we are reading here. Just go on like you are doing now, and you will discover...
Hé, sorry! Don't mean to be rude to anyone. I'm no saint and I don't want to pretend to be an expert in Egyptian culture.
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Maybe writing about the latest events in her life is in some way cathartic for MH? There's nothing wrong with that. Well, if she has decided to bare her heart and soul SO OPENLY on a public forum, it's her choice... (but must think of the consequences later on)
However, if she needs or is susceptible to having other people around to constantly validate her internal attitudes and choices (and all the long threads indicate this scenario), this is a bad, bad situation indeed.
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
What struck me as funny is how others keep adding to the story without her saying anything. It reminds me of when we were kids in school and we whispered something in someones ear and by the time it went through the whole class it had changed.
Its amazing if you really stop and think about it how this world functions at all. With so many conflicting views and all of the things that can and do go wrong, how do we ever accomplish anything?
I guess it beats debating politics and religion. At least we are all wanting the same thing, to help MH... Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I didnt say i am dating, I have been a member of the muslim friend sites for awhile. I am only talking to people and continuing to learn. I am in no position to be dating anyone for quite some time to come. I am still married at the moment, not sure when that will manage to come to an end. As for the visa thing, its not that hard to pick up a phone and contact people to find out what happened at the visa interview you know. No, the petitions are not formally withdrawn, my lawyer is currently working on that. But embassy has been contacted as to what occured at the interview and also lawyer has put a notification on his name and passport number with immigration services so that if his passport is scanned at point of entry then he will be detained so he cannot enter with a visa obtained through me.(Lawyer did that little bit just in case the info embassy gave us was incorrect) And no, i do not hold any hope of reuniting with him. After certain occurances I do not wish to be with him, I would never be with someone that could turn his back on his responsibilities so easily, both to me and to Allah. He will answer to Allah for what he has done that is enough.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
And as for my family and the people i say feed me negative... its not exactly as you think. Its just they dont help, always the how can he do this to you, you gave him your life, you loved him so completely, you are so sweet and he does this to you.. why is he doing this, why now, why not before,,,, they just ask me questions that i dont have the answers to, it confuses me more. They tell me just to pick up and move on immediately find someone that deserves my love, and this and that.. I cant just pick up and move on, no, i am not going back to him but i cant just go on. I dont have the answers they look for, they are the same answers i look for and i ask him the questions and he answers but who knows if what he says is the truth or another lie to try to make things easier on me,,, though what he really means is easier on him... I just dont know... and i cant be around that .
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I didnt say i am dating, I have been a member of the muslim friend sites for awhile. I am only talking to people and continuing to learn. I am in no position to be dating anyone for quite some time to come. I am still married at the moment, not sure when that will manage to come to an end. As for the visa thing, its not that hard to pick up a phone and contact people to find out what happened at the visa interview you know. No, the petitions are not formally withdrawn, my lawyer is currently working on that. But embassy has been contacted as to what occured at the interview and also lawyer has put a notification on his name and passport number with immigration services so that if his passport is scanned at point of entry then he will be detained so he cannot enter with a visa obtained through me.(Lawyer did that little bit just in case the info embassy gave us was incorrect) And no, i do not hold any hope of reuniting with him. After certain occurances I do not wish to be with him, I would never be with someone that could turn his back on his responsibilities so easily, both to me and to Allah. He will answer to Allah for what he has done that is enough.
Something tells me he isn't sitting in his apartment right now shaking in his boots... (unfortunately).
What about you MH? What do you think YOU will have to answer to Allah for? Doesn't matter how flat you make a pancake, it still has two sides. Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Something tells me he isn't sitting in his apartment right now shaking in his boots... (unfortunately).
What about you MH? What do you think YOU will have to answer to Allah for? Doesn't matter how flat you make a pancake, it still has two sides.
I like that! "Doesn't matter how flat you make a pancake, it still has two sides."
Someone did defend Momen slightly on here earlier and this question you raise makes me wonder if MH's neediness, this inate desire to please & always be perfect, and being clingy made him realize what a mistake he had made in marrying her.
Ok. . .I had to play the devil's advocate on that one!
I still stand by my original assessment from over a year ago that the guy was a player. Just looking at his pictures gave me that vibe. The guy knows he's good looking and he uses that to his advantage to screw the ladies over. He's not going to settle down any time soon. . .he'll keep playing the games for sure. I wouldn't be surprised if he won't be one of the ones who takes on more than one wife, too.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I love the way Egyptians can see the photos of other Egyptians and really GET A FEEL for their character, I wish our own soceity was like that...unfortunately it is not. If you ever want to know about your guy, send the photo (a nice closeup showing his face) and wait for the response. Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
MH, you need to get ove this man, seriously. He doesn't want you anymore in his life, he chose someone else to be with. You can't force someone to stay married to you. Yes it's not a good time and it was not fair to you but that's how thing are and as it was said earlier by someone else better now than later. It's over and out and your family is right - move on. Best of luck.
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
OK, I'll be honest here, I also did not get a good impression from his photo's or body language in them, but this might have been due to the prior knowledge we had of him from here.
I have to say this out loud (and she's not going to like it). I also did not have a good feeling about the relationship between Mystic and Yorkshire rose, I stay out of YR posts because on the surface she is very nice to everyone, but I found the way she encouraged Mystic about this man was so 'unfitting' is the best word I can use to describe it and I'm sorry YR but because of that I didnt trust you. Because of this I felt more sorry for Mystic, who was placing her hopes in this man AND being encouraged by her 'friend' on here who seemed to have a loose grip on reality.
I think that people that spoke the truth were dismissed as being 'hateful' for no reason and hope was fuelled by YR and maybe others, I would be interested in why YR felt that this man was so genuine as she always declared.
As for Momen, well he is as he is, true to form I think, I dont think he has changed who he is which is why I am not coming down on him being that devious - I think people give others too much credit, when they are at the end of the day just selfish and not people worthy of much attention, lets face it, he had a website full of pictures of him and other women. Mystic just thought (hoped) like many women that this time it would be different - it wasn't/isnt different ENOUGH for him, he probably just gets bored easily, or thinks that there is a better offer (alot of men are like this)
IMO Mystic will do better just to accept this is just who he is, she hoped he was different, but he isnt, the years not wasted hopefully she will not repeat the same mistakes again.
YR- sorry if I got you completely wrong, but its how I see things, I know that you and mystic love each other but you loved each other before you met and i think its because you were probably one of the only people telling her how wonderful he was, and probably making excuses for him. just a hunch. You did not help her see things realistically and i think you gave her very bad advice on more than one occasion.
Posted by DawnBev08 (Member # 14964) on :
I think MH just has this desperate need to be loved - and so will believe anything from anyone, if its what she wants to hear -
she really needs professional help, seek counselling / therapy, it will be worth it in the end
have to go now, have a train to catch, be back on Monday
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
I am in no position to be dating anyone for quite some time to come.
.....pregnant? Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
She hasn't confirmed that so I hope it was nothing more than gossip.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs: OK, I'll be honest here, I also did not get a good impression from his photo's or body language in them, but this might have been due to the prior knowledge we had of him from here.
I have to say this out loud (and she's not going to like it). I also did not have a good feeling about the relationship between Mystic and Yorkshire rose, I stay out of YR posts because on the surface she is very nice to everyone, but I found the way she encouraged Mystic about this man was so 'unfitting' is the best word I can use to describe it and I'm sorry YR but because of that I didnt trust you. Because of this I felt more sorry for Mystic, who was placing her hopes in this man AND being encouraged by her 'friend' on here who seemed to have a loose grip on reality.
I think that people that spoke the truth were dismissed as being 'hateful' for no reason and hope was fuelled by YR and maybe others, I would be interested in why YR felt that this man was so genuine as she always declared.
As for Momen, well he is as he is, true to form I think, I dont think he has changed who he is which is why I am not coming down on him being that devious - I think people give others too much credit, when they are at the end of the day just selfish and not people worthy of much attention, lets face it, he had a website full of pictures of him and other women. Mystic just thought (hoped) like many women that this time it would be different - it wasn't/isnt different ENOUGH for him, he probably just gets bored easily, or thinks that there is a better offer (alot of men are like this)
IMO Mystic will do better just to accept this is just who he is, she hoped he was different, but he isnt, the years not wasted hopefully she will not repeat the same mistakes again.
YR- sorry if I got you completely wrong, but its how I see things, I know that you and mystic love each other but you loved each other before you met and i think its because you were probably one of the only people telling her how wonderful he was, and probably making excuses for him. just a hunch. You did not help her see things realistically and i think you gave her very bad advice on more than one occasion.
I think EVERY Western woman has to learn how Egyptians are handling this kind of men themselves. They are really not wasting any time, putting no efforts at all, in somebody who acts like that. There IS no benefit of the doubt in Egyptian culture. Doubt means stop it. They can act polight, but in the end their doors are closed. And some are clear like we use to be: I am sorry but I don't want to spend any more time in you. They know their people!!!! So, if somebody is warning another one, because he knows the man is bad, whatever kind of exploinations there might been given, don't take this as an excuse!!! I'm reading advices here about 'when you don't dare, probably you're going to miss the love of your life' or 'follow your heart'....any idea how many damaged women there are by such men??? Nobody will miss anything by such a low life loser, they THINK they do...they want to BELIEVE they do...thay are blinded by the light of their sweet-talking snakes... Just stay away by them...
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
"or thinks that there is a better offer"
Can we talk about this part of it?
I don't remember where I read this and I'm not certain enough with the details, but here's a summary of the story...
Some guys needed transportation and they found this other guy who said he'd get them some horses. Instead the guy showed up with a camel (or two, I don't recall). After riding on the camel(s) for a while, these guys asked why they didn't get the horses he said they'd have. The answer was, again a summary, that the guy said he'd received an offer for the horses that "was better for me" and took it.
I dunno. There's thems that say Islam doesn't say one has to be truthful all of the time. Maybe that's this guy's problem.
(I'm not hating, just putting it out there.)
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
justvisiting - interesting point, you are absolutely right, there are those who say that you dont have to be truthful, usually, those are the ones who are trying to bend the religion to suit their own ends IMO. You might lie to your wife about her cooking, but not other women or other more important things IMO.
with regard to your story about the horses and camels, women are not animals that can be bought and sold like horses and camels, therefore this does not apply. If the man gives his word to the same level of commitment as a marriage that he will get horses, then horses he should deliver. Otherwise the men may find they are soon riding on a dog, because maybe a camel is worth more than a donkey and a donkey is worth more than a dog - do you think the men would be happy to ride a dog? Do you think people will come to the man for horses again?
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Try to act the same to this kind of people. Don't feel the need to keep your already given word, because there was a better offer....they will freak out!!!!
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
"women are not animals that can be bought and sold like horses and camels"
Of course to you and me they aren't but methinks this fella has a different world view. No?
Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
quote:Originally posted by MICKY A: 1) I do not believe you that the 'non-visa' has been verified. So quickly suddenly?? How?? Why did they suddenly answer you, when first they did not and the Embassy hardly ever does, plus you had hardly time to withdraw the sponsorship??? Sorry, you are making this up.. (No reason to withdraw, however, he will need it later on, right??).
bubble, i don't believe that either it took me 3 months for them to withdraw my fiancee' petition, long ago. they aren't that quick
I know, but there is more than meets the eye Just as i was thinking she know says shes pregnanT.Have you had your 3talaks yet cause if you have you are going to wait at leat 3mnths in that time he can come back ,but dont you have to marry someone else to remarry Momen ,and the other bit is if you are pregnant and he dont want to come back ,you seriously want to marry another Muslim to bring up his kid you think then they are marrying you for love NO that will then be a visa user ,as for the American Embassy im sure they will start to think there is something so fishy here . I think if you need Es on your side you need to sit down and tell all the truth ,all of it dear Mystic Or take a long hard holiday away on ES desert island its unhabited at the moment .NO MEN !
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Justvisiting - It would seem that way, certainly. I also think that its about personality too, a matter of fact, pragmatic (this is what I want/this is what i'm gonna do) person with a romantic person doesnt usually work.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Camels...horses...dogs...how did this conversation shift!? Basic point: he won't change for you or anybody else.
The very idea that MH thought he would change or be different WITH HER shows a kind of selfish conceit IMO. (sorry MH just being honest)
I mean if you think about it rationally, he was a player in every aspect of his life, which was clear to see all over the internet. But yet he whispered a few sweet words in her ear and she wanted to marry him 2 months later. Why? Because she had the conceit to actually believe she was WONDERFUL enough for him to change. Wow, imagine the feeling when you realize it wasn't HIM but it was really YOU who was wrong. Sure, as MRS says he is what he is, you can't change that...but MH thought enough of herself to believe she could. That is egotism at it's WORST.
Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
Oh im just seen you are still married so sorry But it is a shame we cant have both sides but then its his privacy not ours to interfere with ,all im saying is Mystic dont go into these sites and even the holy ones everyone has an opinion believe me in how you should handle it and him .You need to take a look at yourown self and be postive cause you have children they are your sanctuary believe you need them and your friends that know you better than the ones here that only see you type and write we dont know you .All this topic is doing is making you Vunerable of the Month .Close pc down take a walk have a picnic with the girls stop wallowing what have could be to what not could be and what he is missing not your problem now ok .I just hope no clicking of fingers comes .
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
Just to show what a waste of breath/time/effort this thread has been:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I was avoiding all but that one person honey, nothing personal, he just knows how to handle me. Anyway i do need to talk to you, i sent you a text but it seems my texts to egypt are being delayed or lost altogether alot lately. And yes honey, i plan to return to egypt, i think in the summer, part of what i need to discuss with you. contact me as soon as you can , i am free all saturday, friday working
From the Happy Birthday Mystic-H x thread
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Yes Smuckers, there is a large element of that as well, I agree.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
Can I just butt in here and say that Mystic has NOT said she is pregnant!! I think I seem to have started this by highlighting a few comments of hers and asking 'I hope you're not what I think you are' or something along those lines. This has NOT been confirmed, this is propably totally WRONG to assume from that that she is.
And putting aside what we already KNEW about the guy before we saw his pics and the website, how the hell can you tell from a pic if a guy is a player?? someone said he was too good looking or something of the like, so is mine, so is Smucks, does that make THEM players? does good looks make a guy a player just because he is good looking? sorry but that dont make sense.
I had this right at the beginning of my relationship with my husband. Someone I knew met him for 5 minutes and decided he was a player based purely on his looks, she didnt take into account how shy he was or that she had not seen him at the disco before, she just spread various gossip to various people, including her own 'husband' who then warned mine about her! This hurt my husband deeply and did the 'injection' in me that she had hoped for. Well thank God it didnt work and she was wrong. But please stop this stupid 'hes good looking so hes bound to be a player' crap. OTHER things known about Momen at the time showed him to be a player, not his looks.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by newcomer: Just to show what a waste of breath/time/effort this thread has been:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I was avoiding all but that one person honey, nothing personal, he just knows how to handle me. Anyway i do need to talk to you, i sent you a text but it seems my texts to egypt are being delayed or lost altogether alot lately. And yes honey, i plan to return to egypt, i think in the summer, part of what i need to discuss with you. contact me as soon as you can , i am free all saturday, friday working
From the Happy Birthday Mystic-H x thread
Jeesh... Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I love the way Egyptians can see the photos of other Egyptians and really GET A FEEL for their character, I wish our own soceity was like that...unfortunately it is not. If you ever want to know about your guy, send the photo (a nice closeup showing his face) and wait for the response.
I'm American so I guess I must have that "special" gift.
Actually my earlier life I encountered many of these types when I worked as a bartender in clubs so I learned well.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Bonzo, I think it differs from culture to culture. So tell us, what is it about our fellow Americans that gives them away as 'bad' ? Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: Can I just butt in here and say that Mystic has NOT said she is pregnant!! I think I seem to have started this by highlighting a few comments of hers and asking 'I hope you're not what I think you are' or something along those lines. This has NOT been confirmed, this is propably totally WRONG to assume from that that she is.
And putting aside what we already KNEW about the guy before we saw his pics and the website, how the hell can you tell from a pic if a guy is a player?? someone said he was too good looking or something of the like, so is mine, so is Smucks, does that make THEM players? does good looks make a guy a player just because he is good looking? sorry but that dont make sense.
I had this right at the beginning of my relationship with my husband. Someone I knew met him for 5 minutes and decided he was a player based purely on his looks, she didnt take into account how shy he was or that she had not seen him at the disco before, she just spread various gossip to various people, including her own 'husband' who then warned mine about her! This hurt my husband deeply and did the 'injection' in me that she had hoped for. Well thank God it didnt work and she was wrong. But please stop this stupid 'hes good looking so hes bound to be a player' crap. OTHER things known about Momen at the time showed him to be a player, not his looks.
You can tell by body language, the eyes, and facial expressions. . .you obviously don't have much experience dealing with these kinds of people. A picture is worth a thousand words and after seeing the pictures of him on his website with his arms around all these women (one had his hand almost on her boob), it was obvious the guy thinks he's hot sh*t. I definitely didn't have to hear the rumors about him to tell right away this guy was up to no good. The fact that he's "good looking" by Egyptian standards had no bearing on my initial reaction to seeing this guy. There was just something in his face/body language that indicated he's cocky and full of himself.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I thought he looked like he was beat with an ugly stick, I saw NOTHING handsome in him whatsoever...just my opinion. Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
charma chameleon they come and go they come and go .
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
Bonzo, I agree those pics with his hands all over a woman show what he is but I said putting aside that, if there was just a pic of him on his own it cannot be deduced that he was a player.
I agree smucks, not good looking in my book but thank God we dont all find the same guys good looking Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
edited better off doing as a pm his email when googled is not so good when you catche it . so im erased if no one else has got before me Sorry last thoughts she dont need more crap here does she .
Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
edited to discusting of the momen80s email
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
erm, well mrs I just clicked to reply the one above the one above but you changed it, better leave it but totally confused now!
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
MH, You were fooling yourself from the beginning and this was expected from the start. I don't blame your husband, i blame YOU.
It's not all about Egyptians, there are some American women in this forum who lie and hide everything just to be with an Egyptian man so its not about Egyptian men only who try to hock up with a foreigner! at least Momen didnt hide anything.
Egyptians are the best either they were men or women, and I don't blame Momen he found a woman who was desperate for love and he didn't hide his past, he had a website already as you have said with pics of him and other women in his arms! what did you expect! He didn't lie or hide or pretend to be single while he is married with kids or widowed or dating someone!
All women here defend eachother, no matter who is right or wrong, all women here see themselves in MH, most of the women here want to get laid or get involved in a relationship with an Egyptian and when they see a western woman fails they all defend her and try to make the Egyptian side look bad while 90% of women here are full of ****.
MH, YR, m.e., Ana Huna, Locale, Vicky, MissSharm,....etc
Please get your head examined, you need serious and professional help.
Dear Momen, I don't blame you. You didn't fool anyone, you didnt hide your pics with other women and you didnt hide your website, they wanted to be fooled, they wanted to be used, they are so weak to admit that, they were despertaly looking for love that they couldnt find in their homeland.
They were looking for love in a different country, with different language and different traditions.
What are they expecting! The only thing they can get is one night stand with an egyptian or a fucked up relationship and its not only because of the egyptian men but i belive that 60% of the women in ES are white trash and that the main reason they couldnt get a man in their homeland!
Like what i have been reading on ES lately, a married woman hiding her kids and husband(s, an American woman in cairo sleeping around, A british woman came to egypt to marry a kid! 25 years younger than her.....etc
What the hell are you doing! Wakeup Western women on ES, You are scum not The egyptians. I work in Sharm and i see lot of western women, I can tell who is trash and who is not. unfortunatly 60% of the western women in this website are trash!
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: I agree smucks, not good looking in my book but thank God we dont all find the same guys good looking
I don't find this guy goodlooking either, I just was too shy to say this... so I am glad you did. About the pics with tourists... I happen to know one guy working in Hurghada. At the end of the quadride, all females WANT a pic with him. It is just to put in the album I guess as some kind of souvenir. So what can an Egyptian guy say?? No, thank you, I don't want to be on a pic with you. Of course not, that would be very impolite!! It is just THE WAY this guy holds these women in his arms , not the fact he is on pics with female tourists.
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
ouch thats not fair and i am not white trash, if my egy, husband heard you say that he would kill you. you dont know me so dont include me Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Here we go again....
I finally thought this thread is dying its well-deserved end but I was wrong.
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: MH, You were fooling yourself from the beginning and this was expected from the start. I don't blame your husband, i blame YOU.
It's not all about Egyptians, there are some American women in this forum who lie and hide everything just to be with an Egyptian man so its not about Egyptian men only who try to hock up with a foreigner! at least Momen didnt hide anything.
Egyptians are the best either they were men or women, and I don't blame Momen he found a woman who was desperate for love and he didn't hide his past, he had a website already as you have said with pics of him and other women in his arms! what did you expect! He didn't lie or hide or pretend to be single while he is married with kids or widowed or dating someone!
All women here defend eachother, no matter who is right or wrong, all women here see themselves in MH, most of the women here want to get laid or get involved in a relationship with an Egyptian and when they see a western woman fails they all defend her and try to make the Egyptian side look bad while 90% of women here are full of ****.
MH, YR, m.e., Ana Huna, Locale, Vicky, MissSharm,....etc
Please get your head examined, you need serious and professional help.
Dear Momen, I don't blame you. You didn't fool anyone, you didnt hide your pics with other women and you didnt hide your website, they wanted to be fooled, they wanted to be used, they are so weak to admit that, they were despertaly looking for love that they couldnt find in their homeland.
They were looking for love in a different country, with different language and different traditions.
What are they expecting! The only thing they can get is one night stand with an egyptian or a fucked up relationship and its not only because of the egyptian men but i belive that 60% of the women in ES are white trash and that the main reason they couldnt get a man in their homeland!
Like what i have been reading on ES lately, a married woman hiding her kids and husband(s, an American woman in cairo sleeping around, A british woman came to egypt to marry a kid! 25 years younger than her.....etc
What the hell are you doing! Wakeup Western women on ES, You are scum not The egyptians. I work in Sharm and i see lot of western women, I can tell who is trash and who is not. unfortunatly 60% of the western women in this website are trash!
And you are...?? A friend of Momen??
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
must be dg. but that really pisses me off for someone to come on here and say we are scums? they dont know us at all Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
Right! Mr Pacha, new member, expert in Western women is probably one of those guys who is insulting western women on a forum while in real life he is chasing prey in Sharm.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
I love ES, its better than Eastenders, Coronation Street, Home & Away and Neighbours all rolled into one Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
I just stopped eating my lunch to see what's going on further. Now back to my plate! Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
Well maybe he was let down by a western woman and she shited on him so he assumes we scum GOOD maybe you care to give us your websites i bet your looking at womans bodies through your two way glasses YOU HAVE HAD A BAD EXSPERIENCE MAYBE NEXT TIME YOU WILL GET IT RIGHT SOME WOMAN LIKE HEATHER OF ES POOR POOR SOUL NOW SHES A DOLL BUT DONT SHE HAVE IT BAD .
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
ROFL...
I'm so glad I have such a good seat... This show has everything, drama, romance, infidelity, murder...We could add a bit more adventure though.
Don't worry Micky, It's only 60%... Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by desertgirl:
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: I agree smucks, not good looking in my book but thank God we dont all find the same guys good looking
I don't find this guy goodlooking either, I just was too shy to say this... so I am glad you did. About the pics with tourists... I happen to know one guy working in Hurghada. At the end of the quadride, all females WANT a pic with him. It is just to put in the album I guess as some kind of souvenir. So what can an Egyptian guy say?? No, thank you, I don't want to be on a pic with you. Of course not, that would be very impolite!! It is just THE WAY this guy holds these women in his arms , not the fact he is on pics with female tourists.
Yes tourists may want a pic of them with their guide, but why on earth would a guide then want to make a website of himself with all those pics...a little egotistical dont you think?
And Pacha didnt say ALL western women, he/she said 60% and while 'white trash' isn't a word I would use, there is a 'type' of women on this forum that act in similar ways to each other.
Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: I love ES, its better than Eastenders, Coronation Street, Home & Away and Neighbours all rolled into one
quote:Originally posted by MICKY A: ouch thats not fair and i am not white trash, if my egy, husband heard you say that he would kill you. you dont know me so dont include me
Here you go Vader, you must of missed this scene.
Thanks for the link Smuckers... Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
i found this quote ^^LOL^
I live in egypt and you often see overweight, middle aged white women with a 20-year old well-built egyptian guy on her arm. Some of the time there may be money involved, but in a lot of cases the guys are really trying to get themselves a wife (i.e. passport).
Im not to huge but my husband is certainly not well built in fact i could squash him and its been 4years so this is well over steps it does it not
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Gosh, I was on page 9 a while ago and I can see it's page 10!! Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
Well you dont want to know what me and Ayisha found but her anti virus worked better than mine .I did publish it then i took it away discusting . Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
You guys, Momen is not ugly. This is Ugly. Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
LMAO!!! ^^^^
thanks of gold...i've been waiting for an appropriate time to post and add to this misery...maybe we can make it to 11 pages before 3pm today?
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
LOL.... did anyone pay attention to the love quote he posted on his website:
''Love is like the wind, You can't see it, but you can feel it taking you in its warm embrace like a soft blanket "
What a damn shame his blanket must have had many holes because the love feeling left him so fast!! Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: You guys, Momen is not ugly. This is Ugly.
Coffee went everywhere ,DONT COMPARE HIM TO MOMEN how the hell can he be a gigolo who the hell would he get for him to marry for a visa no comparrison here ,hes cutey . Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by MrsCoconut:
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: I love ES, its better than Eastenders, Coronation Street, Home & Away and Neighbours all rolled into one
i like her shes funny witty and great for eastenders i hope she has some luck soon .
I do get Eastenders on BBC Prime Its now on Mon - Thurs with omnibus at weekends when I catch up Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: ROFL...
I'm so glad I have such a good seat... This show has everything, drama, romance, infidelity, murder...We could add a bit more adventure though.
Don't worry Micky, It's only 60%...
Hands up all the other ladies joining me in the 40% Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs: [/qb]
Yes tourists may want a pic of them with their guide, but why on earth would a guide then want to make a website of himself with all those pics...a little egotistical dont you think?
[/QB][/QUOTE]
perhaps egotistical...but could also be perceived as smart business sense...create a website with pictures and testimonials and your business prospects go up...
just a thought!
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: ROFL...
I'm so glad I have such a good seat... This show has everything, drama, romance, infidelity, murder...We could add a bit more adventure though.
Don't worry Micky, It's only 60%...
Sorry,Of Gold,i got here before you and for such i have an arena seat. Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by walkingathinline: Originally posted by Mrs: Yes tourists may want a pic of them with their guide, but why on earth would a guide then want to make a website of himself with all those pics...a little egotistical dont you think?
perhaps egotistical...but could also be perceived as smart business sense...create a website with pictures and testimonials and your business prospects go up...
just a thought!
Of course they go up!! for the wrong reasons, isn't that called prostitution? I mean is he a tourist or a giggalo? Are they coming to Egypt for the pyraminds or an overfriendly guide? If that raised his business profile it was to a certain kind of client.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
He copied couple of testimonials from the website of his employer:
out of 13 pictures there are only 3 with his arm around someone...
i would sure like to hear from him at this point...like someone said earlier, there are two sides to the pancake, no matter how flat (or something like that)
OM!
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs: OK, I'll be honest here, I also did not get a good impression from his photo's or body language in them, but this might have been due to the prior knowledge we had of him from here.
I have to say this out loud (and she's not going to like it). I also did not have a good feeling about the relationship between Mystic and Yorkshire rose, I stay out of YR posts because on the surface she is very nice to everyone, but I found the way she encouraged Mystic about this man was so 'unfitting' is the best word I can use to describe it and I'm sorry YR but because of that I didnt trust you. Because of this I felt more sorry for Mystic, who was placing her hopes in this man AND being encouraged by her 'friend' on here who seemed to have a loose grip on reality.
I think that people that spoke the truth were dismissed as being 'hateful' for no reason and hope was fuelled by YR and maybe others, I would be interested in why YR felt that this man was so genuine as she always declared.
As for Momen, well he is as he is, true to form I think, I dont think he has changed who he is which is why I am not coming down on him being that devious - I think people give others too much credit, when they are at the end of the day just selfish and not people worthy of much attention, lets face it, he had a website full of pictures of him and other women. Mystic just thought (hoped) like many women that this time it would be different - it wasn't/isnt different ENOUGH for him, he probably just gets bored easily, or thinks that there is a better offer (alot of men are like this)
IMO Mystic will do better just to accept this is just who he is, she hoped he was different, but he isnt, the years not wasted hopefully she will not repeat the same mistakes again.
YR- sorry if I got you completely wrong, but its how I see things, I know that you and mystic love each other but you loved each other before you met and i think its because you were probably one of the only people telling her how wonderful he was, and probably making excuses for him. just a hunch. You did not help her see things realistically and i think you gave her very bad advice on more than one occasion.
Originally posted by mysticheart: Hey Yorkie sweety, contact me, i havent seen you online, need to talk to you. And by the way, my hotmail or msn is still the same, i didnt change that one hahaha only the yahoo sweety. Anyway need to discuss something
I'm so glad I have such a good seat... This show has everything, drama, romance, infidelity, murder...We could add a bit more adventure though.
Don't worry Micky, It's only 60%...
Hands up all the other ladies joining me in the 40%
Well, I was quite sure that I was in the 40% but then again, I do like to go to garage sales. And the part about wanting to get laid, does it matter if you are particular or is it that if you ever want to get laid it drops your class scores? I was also contemplating that the fact I am delightfully enjoying this thread may lower my score considerably... maybe not completely to lower class though.
OK Ayisha, I'm in! Gold proudly raises her hand to join Ayisha in the 40%. (better join while you can ladies, space is limited)
oops, sorry Sashyra, for spilling my buttered pop corn on you in your arena seat. Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
I cant believe walkingathinline is suggesting that I (moi????) am giving Momen (angel face) a bad reputation which is completely unjustified...I could cry, but I dont do that, I search the internet for PROOF that this man is not what he may seem, and I got a virus!!! I didnt even go near him and I get a virus!!! bloody typical!
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs: I cant believe walkingathinline is suggesting that I (moi????) am giving Momen (angel face) a bad reputation which is completely unjustified...I could cry, but I dont do that, I search the internet for PROOF that this man is not what he may seem, and I got a virus!!! I didnt even go near him and I get a virus!!! bloody typical!
i'm not suggesting anything...i never said YOU were giving him a bad reputation...where did i say that?? don't read between the lines or make assumptions...i just said that perhaps instead of ego, it was a business thing...again, JUST A THOUGHT
all i'm saying is there are two sides to every story and IN MY OPINION i don't see anything wrong with his website...(oh i'm sure i'll be crucified for that comment)
OM PEACE PEACE PEACE
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Exactly Makbeta:
quote from Missnoor(a friend of mystics):
Mystic.....Seek what is in your heart sweetie and if it feels good do it! Life is what you make of it and we have no one to blame but ourselves.......The trick is to learn from your mistakes! If you do the same mistake over, over and over then something is not clicking upstairs...Then that is where the problems arise...I wish you joy and happiness in whatever you decide to do.....Lucy
Walkingathinline
I know, I was just kidding, I forgot to add the smily face, there may well be nothing wrong with this one of his websites NOW, I was referring to back then, I tried to go and check if it was the same...but ended up with a virus, which like i said was typical!!! Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: MH, You were fooling yourself from the beginning and this was expected from the start. I don't blame your husband, i blame YOU.
It's not all about Egyptians, there are some American women in this forum who lie and hide everything just to be with an Egyptian man so its not about Egyptian men only who try to hock up with a foreigner! at least Momen didnt hide anything.
Egyptians are the best either they were men or women, and I don't blame Momen he found a woman who was desperate for love and he didn't hide his past, he had a website already as you have said with pics of him and other women in his arms! what did you expect! He didn't lie or hide or pretend to be single while he is married with kids or widowed or dating someone!
All women here defend eachother, no matter who is right or wrong, all women here see themselves in MH, most of the women here want to get laid or get involved in a relationship with an Egyptian and when they see a western woman fails they all defend her and try to make the Egyptian side look bad while 90% of women here are full of ****.
MH, YR, m.e., Ana Huna, Locale, Vicky, MissSharm,....etc
Please get your head examined, you need serious and professional help.
Dear Momen, I don't blame you. You didn't fool anyone, you didnt hide your pics with other women and you didnt hide your website, they wanted to be fooled, they wanted to be used, they are so weak to admit that, they were despertaly looking for love that they couldnt find in their homeland.
They were looking for love in a different country, with different language and different traditions.
What are they expecting! The only thing they can get is one night stand with an egyptian or a fucked up relationship and its not only because of the egyptian men but i belive that 60% of the women in ES are white trash and that the main reason they couldnt get a man in their homeland!
Like what i have been reading on ES lately, a married woman hiding her kids and husband(s, an American woman in cairo sleeping around, A british woman came to egypt to marry a kid! 25 years younger than her.....etc
What the hell are you doing! Wakeup Western women on ES, You are scum not The egyptians. I work in Sharm and i see lot of western women, I can tell who is trash and who is not. unfortunatly 60% of the western women in this website are trash!
Forgive me my humble opinion, but you seem to be quite familiar to Red Sea area's and what's happening there. Aren't you trying to sweep clean your street by stating that the women are trash? I know about the common opinion that Egyptian men have about Western women, but at the same time I know this is the opinion from someone who doesn't know better, or doesn't want to know better, because the opinion fits him very well. Please forgive me again, but your own compatriots from a bit higher educational level wrote a thesis about it; they made perfect analysis on everyone who is involved, the men, the women, the parents, the families, the social classes,the psychlogical aspects, the economical and financial situation and at last: health. So, mister naming himself to a rather dirty disco; tell me : Is this how you trying to talk white what's black in your heart??? I know very well you were not talking about me, and I know very well that it takes two to tango. The women that like themselve to get laid, well, of course there are such women! But there has to be an personality to make that done, and he has to be from the same kind of people! For every possible picture there is a frame, but at least don't be so hypocritical to blame it to only one side. Because in my humble opinion, forgive me my rudeness; you are as bad as the ones you are defending, mr. Pasha.... Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<better join while you can ladies, space is limited>
Still hesitating and wondering if you are one of the 40% decent ES ladies left????
Call us now at 1-900-000-000.Few spaces left and limited while they last!!! Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
I think I might like to try and be white trash for a while, Its a new experience Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Damn, where did I leave my trailer Posted by Anthropos (Member # 9410) on :
I can't be bothered to read all the posts.
Can somebody sum up what has happened?
All I know is that mysticheart's husband decided not to join her in USA and marriage is finished.
is the reason known?
RECAP please!
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
reason = sick mother
but we are now debating who is and isn't white trash, because 60% of us are white trash...is it you? there is not much room left in the 40%, you have to see sashyra for tickets Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by walkingathinline: out of 13 pictures there are only 3 with his arm around someone...
i would sure like to hear from him at this point...like someone said earlier, there are two sides to the pancake, no matter how flat (or something like that)
OM!
He changed the pictures he used to have on there when him and MH were first carrying on. The pics he had on there were with nice looking young western girls in bar/restaurant settings looking mighty cozy. The one he has up now are relatively tame compared to the ones he used to have there.
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
There's a recipe I read somewhere for white trash ice cream cake. I think you layer a large rectangular pan with ice cream sandwiches and then put cool whip or something on top.
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by doodlebug: There's a recipe I read somewhere for white trash ice cream cake. I think you layer a large rectangular pan with ice cream sandwiches and then put cool whip or something on top.
are you joining us for ice cream sandwiches then doodlebug?
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
nope I'm on a liquid only diet. Have to lose 5 lbs for my tubal reversal surgery. If I were though I like Skinny Cows better than normal ice cream sammiches. They're thicker. Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: Damn, where did I leave my trailer
Oh cheers Tiger! I knew I shouldn't have had that last bottle of Jack Daniels! :rolleyes:hiccup.
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
i am starting with grey goose with lime, i cant take much more of this thread coming to be with jd and young at heart
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
i don't drink alcohol but i'll bring my carnation instant breakfast!
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
You're all welcome in my palatial home!!!!!!!!!! Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
I will come as long as i can park my horse outside and dont annoy me or I'l burn your trailer down.
what I wanna know is how come you white trash can afford all these holidays in Egypt when I cant??!!!
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Your horse is welcome as long as he doesn't kick the dog, and upset the neighbours, I have my reputation to think of!!!! Its's because of the holidays that I live in a place like this Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: Its's because of the holidays that I live in a place like this
good point, so what your saying is... I'm paying for all your trips cant you at least go on the game? Egyptian punters only of course Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Well you know how it is, the Egyptian punters tend to want paying not the other way round Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: You're all welcome in my palatial home!!!!!!!!!!
Talking about The ES Big Big Meeting - there we are, girls!! Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs: I will come as long as i can park my horse outside and dont annoy me or I'l burn your trailer down.
what I wanna know is how come you white trash can afford all these holidays in Egypt when I cant??!!!
exactly, i don't live in a trailer Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Yes you can all meet at my place. But the first person to diss my wonderful home, gets tied to the truck for a bumpy ride!!!!!!!!!!! Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: Well you know how it is, the Egyptian punters tend to want paying not the other way round
1 egp
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Well, I mean how am I and the 8 kids supposed to survive!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
no silly, trailer trash dont KEEP their kids, you have them then sell them to the highest bidder - dont tell me they forgot to tell you, give Angelina a call, she might want some more, what colours do you have?
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Oh s...t, I didn't think of that(well I've not been able to think since 1985). Pick a colour, I'm sure I'll have one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
stepping out of trailer trash land for a minute, thats a good point i just made. Now why is it that Madonna or Angelina want a baby from another country yet they dont want to take a child on from America, one that is poor, homeless and an orphan. there must be some, but somehow I think they wouldn't consider it such a good deed would they? such a noble publicity stunt (I mean 'thing to do'). And the child would not be so 'exotic'. Wouldn't it be fairer to the child? it would have been from its own culture then too.
Anyway, back to trash land, I am sure thinking belongs elsewhere.
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
No I totally agree Mrs, I think this came up a few months ago here. It is very unfair that they basically buy a 'cute' baby from overseas and so many in their homeland must need a loving home. Same token I'm sure I couldn't go to a third world country and walk out with a baby just like that! Anyway must replenish my JD supplies! If any of you arrive before I'm back, the key is under the rock, make yourselves at home Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
I see the ES girls are having fun on Friday afternoon! Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: No I totally agree Mrs, I think this came up a few months ago here. It is very unfair that they basically buy a 'cute' baby from overseas and so many in their homeland must need a loving home. Same token I'm sure I couldn't go to a third world country and walk out with a baby just like that! Anyway must replenish my JD supplies! If any of you arrive before I'm back, the key is under the rock, make yourselves at home
i am coming Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
"the key is under the rock"
As long as it isn't a jagged rock that will tear my new maternity wedding dress I'll come.
Finding that dress was hard because they don't make too many white ones, and I deeeeeeeserve a white wedding dress. Besides, it goes with my husband's/cousin's truck - and the couch on the porch.
Posted by Sparkle16 (Member # 13047) on :
I said I wouldn't post again but I have to get my thoughts out there! Looking again at Momen's website from Smuckers "Honestly, I don't see anything inappropriate with a tour guide plastering pictures of himself with tourists". In Canada, we call this marketing!! If I looked at that website and knew nothing about Momen, I would think he was just marketing his business. No problem with that! I think his pictures are fine and I have taken pictures of people that I have met in my travels and have come to be special to me. No biggie...
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting: "the key is under the rock"
As long as it isn't a jagged rock that will tear my new maternity wedding dress I'll come.
Finding that dress was hard because they don't make too many white ones, and I deeeeeeeserve a white wedding dress. Besides, it goes with my husband's/cousin's truck - and the couch on the porch.
huh Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
I was pissing about the trailer trash comment.
There's nothing like painting all people with a really wide brush, huh?
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sparkle16: I said I wouldn't post again but I have to get my thoughts out there! Looking again at Momen's website from Smuckers "Honestly, I don't see anything inappropriate with a tour guide plastering pictures of himself with tourists". In Canada, we call this marketing!! If I looked at that website and knew nothing about Momen, I would think he was just marketing his business. No problem with that! I think his pictures are fine and I have taken pictures of people that I have met in my travels and have come to be special to me. No biggie...
i thought the same thing too, Sparkle...
someone said that he changed his website and now it is much more conservative than before...
but anyway...
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: MH, You were fooling yourself from the beginning and this was expected from the start. I don't blame your husband, i blame YOU.
It's not all about Egyptians, there are some American women in this forum who lie and hide everything just to be with an Egyptian man so its not about Egyptian men only who try to hock up with a foreigner! at least Momen didnt hide anything.
Egyptians are the best either they were men or women, and I don't blame Momen he found a woman who was desperate for love and he didn't hide his past, he had a website already as you have said with pics of him and other women in his arms! what did you expect! He didn't lie or hide or pretend to be single while he is married with kids or widowed or dating someone!
All women here defend eachother, no matter who is right or wrong, all women here see themselves in MH, most of the women here want to get laid or get involved in a relationship with an Egyptian and when they see a western woman fails they all defend her and try to make the Egyptian side look bad while 90% of women here are full of ****.
MH, YR, m.e., Ana Huna, Locale, Vicky, MissSharm,....etc
Please get your head examined, you need serious and professional help.
Dear Momen, I don't blame you. You didn't fool anyone, you didnt hide your pics with other women and you didnt hide your website, they wanted to be fooled, they wanted to be used, they are so weak to admit that, they were despertaly looking for love that they couldnt find in their homeland.
They were looking for love in a different country, with different language and different traditions.
What are they expecting! The only thing they can get is one night stand with an egyptian or a fucked up relationship and its not only because of the egyptian men but i belive that 60% of the women in ES are white trash and that the main reason they couldnt get a man in their homeland!
Like what i have been reading on ES lately, a married woman hiding her kids and husband(s, an American woman in cairo sleeping around, A british woman came to egypt to marry a kid! 25 years younger than her.....etc
What the hell are you doing! Wakeup Western women on ES, You are scum not The egyptians. I work in Sharm and i see lot of western women, I can tell who is trash and who is not. unfortunatly 60% of the western women in this website are trash!
this is what i meant about huh?
Posted by Sparkle16 (Member # 13047) on :
But, you know, really we have only heard one side of this story!! I am sure he has his reasons for what he did too. I don't believe he wants a visa. Why, he has a good job (relatively speaking) in Egypt with family and friends. Why would he leave? He meets lots of people who probably tip him well. I know for myself I have struggled with moving to another country and it is very difficult. Everybody I love is in Canada.
Let's play devils advocate and say Momen is a sleaze with woman for sure but Mystic is not a woman that I would want to strap myself to if I was a man. The emotional responsibility would be too great. Come on, the guy has never married and doesn't have children, why would he want someone with 4 or 5 kids. I just think Mystic has been telling us little stories. Do we know for sure that they are even married? This is the internet after all. Anyone enough from me. I am going out in the real world on a beautiful sunny Good Friday. Happy Easter everyone!
Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
That was me. . .he changed his website and it's MUCH more conservative now with his pix than it was when he was wooing MH. Most of the pictures then were him with all different kinds of women with his arms around them in bar/restaurant settings.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I'm sure they were ALL his customers...ahem, in some way or another. Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I'm sure they were ALL his customers...ahem, in some way or another.
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
"The only thing they can get is one night stand with an egyptian"
Does anyone else see the hypocracy here?
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
yes and he was 'marketing' himself in Cyprus, Australia and China... ahem Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
i am in the 40% , i am i am !!! Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting: "The only thing they can get is one night stand with an egyptian"
Does anyone else see the hypocracy here?
You are right.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by manx: i am in the 40% , i am i am !!!
Sorry to inform you are late.Sold out! Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
Hahaha... where is Mister Pacha btw? Busy in Sharm?? Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8:
quote:Originally posted by manx: i am in the 40% , i am i am !!!
Sorry to inform you are late.Sold out!
You must be kidding, Sash!! Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Have new supply of JD now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8:
quote:Originally posted by manx: i am in the 40% , i am i am !!!
Sorry to inform you are late.Sold out!
What do you mean, she is late? We only have 2; 3 if you are in, and the trailer trash is having all the fun... They have JD and some kind of ice cream thing. It's crazy over there....
.....gold throws a black sheet on, and grabs a bottle of wine... How good is your acting manx? We are going in cognito... I might be able to pull off an upper class white trash... Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
of gold. come to the party!!!!!!
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
Vodka and Red Bull for me girls Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
No probs advocate! pull up a chair
Posted by goingthere (Member # 14911) on :
Sorry, I have been lurking here for a few days, and have to say I am totally shocked and intrigued by all of this.
I followed a link to an older thread, which had a link to a still older thread and on and on. I found myself sucked into a drama that has gone on for 3 years it seems. I got lost in a labyrinth of chaos: ex-boyfriends, ex-husband living the driveway, I know that MH is a waitress in a restaurant that is one drive from her home and wears a white button-down shirt to work, I know the population of Roachdale, the nearest town to her, the median income, as well as the percentage of people who live there that are white, I know what her home is worth, how much she paid for it, and that there is a condemned house nearby dragging down the property value. There was an orfi marrige certificate(this one?, or a previous one?) that was signed without understanding what it was, and then ripped up, ending that marriage (or this one? or to start this one? There are children, and the possibility of another (speculation only, at this point). I know what the soon-to be-ex looks like (agreed not at all handsome), his job, and even the name of his former employer, I have seen his postings across the web, and his website. I know that they met here, and what she wore (or wanted to wear) to her wedding. Every aspect of their relationship seems to be available for public consumption, all carefully doled out to heighten the drama. And most likely carefully edited as well, to build the plot. And I must admit, an interesting plot it is. There was the declaration in April 2007 that MH was out of ES forever, "bye, bye". But now back here again, with a broken heart. I dont want to appear judegemental or cruel, but when every tiny detail of your life is available on line, that is a risk that you are taking everyone has an opinion, and many of us are willing to share it.
I am sure my interest in all of this places me securely in the 60% of scum. And that is OK with me, it is just someones opinion. However, if someone could summarize the details....maybe I could stop reading through these old threads, I am in danger of being addicted to ES and the the never-ending story provided by MH
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Can i come if i bring the cocaine, hashish and pills? But i couldn't get a babysitter so i have left my 7 kids home alone, they will be okay won't they? I have left some food in the kitchen for them? Don't think they can cook (the oldest is only 8) but never mind she is used to looking after the others... Can't afford the taxi fare so i will give the cabbie a quickie i'm sure he will be happy with that... Gues number 8 will be on the way but hell more state benefit to spend on alcohol and drugs... See you soon guys Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<Every aspect of their relationship seems to be available for public consumption, all carefully doled out to heighten the drama.>
<There was the declaration in April 2007 that MH was out of ES forever, "bye, bye".>
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Habeeby, No probs girl!!!!!!! Just don't make a mess in my lovely home, when no 8 decides to come!!!!. We will have another reason to have a small celebration. Bring the JD with you Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
And so Episode 127 of ES Street continues...
Here is the trailer for the next episode...
The 'good looking'? Gigolo Momen has received his Visa and now uses his latest naive westerner to accompany him to the US, that way he will not be stopped and asked to many difficult questions by immigration... His broken hearted ex trawls the internet looking for a new Muslim man to mend her broken heart... The ES junkies continue to speculate is MH pregnant? Will she seek therapy? Will she ever find a good man?
Tune in for the next episode, come on i know you will you are addicted Posted by goingthere (Member # 14911) on :
addicted yes, is there a 12 step program? support group?
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
young do you have yrself some of that Fox Sports on the teleeevision? I can't be comin over there if y'all don't have it 'cause I need to get me my NASCAR fix while I'm eatin' my ice cream pie. I should be good for a few hours. Filled the babies' bottles up with some boonsfarm apple wine so they won't be squakin' much when they sees that I'm not there. Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
YH i got a crate of JD i can afford it with benefits for 7 kids... Don't worry about me making a mess i've had that many kids they just drop out without touching the sides... comes in handy too when i wanna go shoplifting, just shove everything up my tush Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Doodle, ofcourse I have!!!!!!! Always keep cable going no matter what. The babies will be fine,wine will keep them from squakin hun !!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Unfortunately yes, the whole thing is real. I wish it weren't guys but it is. No, i am not perfect to live with, but the honest truth if it is that our marital problems did not start until I found some small things that he was hiding, I put pressure on him to set things right, I questioned him about possibly phone calls he might have been getting, i wasnt there of course to know, he was sick of being under suspicion as he called it, as I should just trust him and know he wasnt talking to that person instead of questioning him and making his life harder as i was told. Then during my trip there i noticed phone calls taken privately, though i decided that wasnt happening and stood there in the room where he left to to listen, in which i was promptly told i was behaving like a step mother, then the use of certain accounts that i was told he no longer used, and i confronted him on and again i was making his life difficult, it was only work after all... Basically people I did what he asked, however, when i saw that some people did not know we were married, i demanded that they did, i did insist on it and therefore , his definition of pushy,, when he got his packet from embassy he was hesitant in doing everything and getting it sent back in, stating he was worried about what he would do here and leaving everything, i told him then, he had a choice, either he wanted to be with me or he didnt, simple as that, he did the papers and then of course in the end, stated i pushed him to do them. Now granted when petitions were approved he was the one saying that our lawyer needed to hurry up and get the papers to us cause we didnt need to waste time.. but after i discovered the hidden friends that also didnt know about me, things changed, he was no longer so eager to come here. Of course, now the wife knew he was hiding things, and she was determined to know the truth and make sure every single person in his life knew about her.. so yeah, well there, that was his problem, loving little wife that allowed most things, would not allow that. She became insistant and told him wel you can either behave as married or divorce me. Either be with me or leave me. And my return to egypt this summer is for my daughter, not for a man.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
Large Brandy please someone and can I sit next to Habeeby?
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Habeeby ,O thats great, your an expert at not getting caught! Knew I could rely on you. My bottle is nearly finished hiccup ,So where is all the other ES members?
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Ayisha i know what your after you just want to sit next to me to find out what i've got up my tush.... or is it my crate of JD your after? Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
Habeeby, cocain is an upper class drug. I bet ya heart has some grass growing out back though, ya'll go ahead and toke...I will just inhale deeply...
Habeeby, are you getting laid? Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
What I don't get is why bother having a phone conversation in private while you're there? Seriously I have no clue what my husband's saying on the phone since it's all in Arabic. Do you speak Arabic or are all these women that he talks to English?
I also don't get how you both bumped into all these women that he didn't introduce you to as his wife. We never bumped into women. Ever. It was all men and the first thing he'd do is introduce me as his wife, which sometimes was a pain since that meant a simple hello turned into a 1/2 hour come have some tea and talk thing. lol
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Oh dam, you caught me out gold I don't need busted again!!!!!!
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Gold i am always getting laid thats how i get my coke you know the score a good blowjob and i get my coke for free
Doodle have you not learned yet to understand some of what is being said? I do not speak Arabic but when my hubby is speaking i can usually get the gist of the conversation... He laughs about this because when he has finished i tell him what he was talking about... I agree with you on one thing though if my husband was introducing me to women i would be suspiciouse... like you i only ever met men and was always introduced as his wife, then comes the food and the tea Lol
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: Habeeby ,O thats great, your an expert at not getting caught! Knew I could rely on you. My bottle is nearly finished hiccup ,So where is all the other ES members?
I`m on my way with a plate full of yummy Egy turnovers and finger food!!!! Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
habeeby I have NO interest in your tushy dear girl, but you did mention cocaine, hashish and pills I could do with a couple of vallium right now. JD will do if there is no brandy though.
Anyone have any skins??
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I wont give huge details, but...He does have his reasons, huge reasons, however that doesnt stop the awful devastation. This is not my choice but his, again circumstances. He says he cant destroy my life any further by letting me stay in a marriage where we would be apart so much.
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: She became insistant and told him wel you can either behave as married or divorce me. Either be with me or leave me.
Interesting how the actual reason is a complete turnaround of the first reason that was given Posted by egypte (Member # 14273) on :
Catch it before the posts disappear.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<Anyone have any skins??>
Shall i undertand potato skins,or are there any others i still don`t know about? Can`t you just do with some Frito Lays,Doritos or good ol`crunchy Cheetos???
Posted by egypte (Member # 14273) on :
Aww, the post naming Connie is already gone. Don't those two ever go to bed?
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Sorry Ayisha though you were after my pilfered goods Your welcome to share my stash of drugs what's your choice - uppers? downers? sideways? i have it all... and the skins or we could get really stoned and have a bong, what do you think? Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by newcomer:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I wont give huge details, but...He does have his reasons, huge reasons, however that doesnt stop the awful devastation. This is not my choice but his, again circumstances. He says he cant destroy my life any further by letting me stay in a marriage where we would be apart so much.
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: She became insistant and told him wel you can either behave as married or divorce me. Either be with me or leave me.
Interesting how the actual reason is a complete turnaround of the first reason that was given
Awwwwww...newcomer,how can you still not undertand it will all come in chapters,like succesful TV soaps???? Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
egypte they dont disappear, they are not uploaded if they are the disappearing type of post. That is one boring bitch fest on there anyway, talk about a woman scorned
sash I meant other skins its ok i found some
*grabs munchies off sash and hides behind habeeby*
Posted by egypte (Member # 14273) on :
For those who missed the link to the site that has got her all in a fit:
Oh that is great Sash, ready for some light refreshments!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
*gets bong out and passes to habeeby to fill it* Posted by egypte (Member # 14273) on :
No, he hacked it and had posted some new messages. But she deleted them now. There are at least 6 or 7 messages that were tehre a few minutes ago and now are not.
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Oh my trailer is rocking tonight . Remember not to upset the neighbours Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
*habeeby fills the bong and disappears in a cloud of fragrant hash smoke*
*cough* *cough* *cough* Oh my god that's good ****, here you go Ayisha...
*habeeby floats away on a cloud* Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Hey guys is this the BIG BIG MEETING you've all been talking about? Where's Yorky she wanted to be here?
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
The phone calls were in english, and i didnt bump into them. I had created a facebook account a few months back and searched as it always does for people in the address book that already had it, noticed he had one, sent a request, he never accepted me on it, i asked why , he said he never uses it, but during my stay i noticed that facebook was in my history on my laptop and there was a title to a message, that was all i could see, so i confronted him, was supposedly someone that sends him extra work, that he doesnt usually use it but the messages werent coming to his phone so she sent a message there. I let it go, a "friend" thought it not right that he didnt add me and messaged the women in the facebook, his friends, they all replied as friends only but didnt know he was married, cept one, she did, and then one contacted me directly asking me when we married and all kinds of questions, which is coincidentally the one that is there now staying with her brother who is my husbands flatmate... hmm I didnt want to argue but sent an email to him saying to add me to the account, he didnt, and a few days later informed me he wasnt coming. There... that is how i know they didnt know.
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8: Awwwwww...newcomer,how can you still not undertand it will all come in chapters,like succesful TV soaps????
So that's why we switched into the third person Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
yippie...a bong...
I wanna get laid, but Im a selfish lover, Im all about being adored.. gimmy, gimmy, gimmy Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Is that 'a man after midnight' as in Abba
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
*Gold takes the bong and sucks like a dyson* Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by egypte: No, he hacked it and had posted some new messages. But she deleted them now. There are at least 6 or 7 messages that were tehre a few minutes ago and now are not.
LOL its an old trick egypte. Post a few anti remarks, let a few see them, delete them and blame someone that you're having a go at for it all. I doubt there is actually more than one person ever posting on there, one with a warped mind and lots of identities as usual Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
This is so much more fun than debating whether Jesus is God or man. Or to cover or not to cover. Or is Bush an idiot or what....well, not really much of a debate there.... Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
someone take that bong off Gold Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by newcomer:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I wont give huge details, but...He does have his reasons, huge reasons, however that doesnt stop the awful devastation. This is not my choice but his, again circumstances. He says he cant destroy my life any further by letting me stay in a marriage where we would be apart so much.
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: She became insistant and told him wel you can either behave as married or divorce me. Either be with me or leave me.
Interesting how the actual reason is a complete turnaround of the first reason that was given
Thats because i accepted the first reason then as time went i decided that didnt sound right, that there was more to it, i asked him, have told him i dont believe it, and as time goes i have come to my conclusion just from little things he has said and things i saw.
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
I can see you are having a good time, girls. Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: *gets bong out and passes to habeeby to fill it*
i will fill i will fill Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
micky dont fill it with spaghetti Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by egypte: No, he hacked it and had posted some new messages. But she deleted them now. There are at least 6 or 7 messages that were tehre a few minutes ago and now are not.
oooh I just looked, thats not a very flattering pic Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart:
quote:Originally posted by newcomer:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I wont give huge details, but...He does have his reasons, huge reasons, however that doesnt stop the awful devastation. This is not my choice but his, again circumstances. He says he cant destroy my life any further by letting me stay in a marriage where we would be apart so much.
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: She became insistant and told him wel you can either behave as married or divorce me. Either be with me or leave me.
Interesting how the actual reason is a complete turnaround of the first reason that was given
Thats because i accepted the first reason then as time went i decided that didnt sound right, that there was more to it, i asked him, have told him i dont believe it, and as time goes i have come to my conclusion just from little things he has said and things i saw.
Here,Mystic,drink some booze.It might clear up your mind. Don`t forget to chomp on some yummy mezze,too!
*passes bucket full of booze and cold beers to Mystic along with the leftovers plate of mezze*
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: micky dont fill it with spaghetti
hashees all the way or i will fill it with grey goose Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
http://www.blogigo.com/CleanUpLuxor
Wow...what a Scary Mary!!! Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
I read your replies and laugh. Everyone is defending MH and everyone will defend any western woman in this forum and believe everything she says while she might be a liar or cheater or psycho. What is funny that you act as if you know each other while i am sure you have never seen each other before! lol
Believe the American woman who sleeps around or the married American woman who denies her lovely kids and her husband and all her past! or the American woman who went in 4 relationships with egy guys! or the British woman who is so desperate to find an Egyptian lover!! and dont believe any egyptian guy who for sure is more educated and more respectabel than most of the american women in this forum, you see this normal for american women to sleep around cheat lie pretend f**k but when an Egyptian man refuses to be with an American woman then he is wrong as if he is a slave he cant change his mind he didn't lie to her, he didn't use her for the so called visa, btw we don't want your visa shove it up your A** and F**k off Egypt is the origin and you are just a copy We are the origin of the world and sooner or later America will go down and you will come crawling for our visa and our men and our civilization
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
No thank you, Mystic will concentrate on reading Quran and trying to plan the trip to egypt for her daughter she promised. Gotta figure out how long in each place to stay and where we will go. Alex, Cairo and Sharm
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: I read your replies and laugh. Everyone is defending MH and everyone will defend any western woman in this forum and believe everything she says while she might be a liar or cheater or psycho. What is funny that you act as if you know each other while i am sure you have never seen each other before! lol
Believe the American woman who sleeps around or the married American woman who denies her lovely kids and her husband and all her past! or the American woman who went in 4 relationships with egy guys! or the British woman who is so desperate to find an Egyptian lover!! and dont believe any egyptian guy who for sure is more educated and more respectabel than most of the american women in this forum, you see this normal for american women to sleep around cheat lie pretend f**k but when an Egyptian man refuses to be with an American woman then he is wrong as if he is a slave he cant change his mind he didn't lie to her, he didn't use her for the so called visa, btw we don't want your visa shove it up your A** and F**k off Egypt is the origin and you are just a copy We are the origin of the world and sooner or later America will go down and you will come crawling for our visa and our men and our civilization
the funny thing is we dont need to crawl for yr men they come find us!!!!!! why is that????? most not for visa so dont go there!!!!!!! and most of us aint muslim!!! so tell me why does yr so called men prefer white women??
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
MH Just move on and try to forget about the whole experience, i am sure you are not like the other american women i have read about in this forum, the woman who denies her husband and family or the woman who sleeps around,....etc You are decent woman and i wish you the best. peace be upon you.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: MH, You were fooling yourself from the beginning and this was expected from the start. I don't blame your husband, i blame YOU.
It's not all about Egyptians, there are some American women in this forum who lie and hide everything just to be with an Egyptian man so its not about Egyptian men only who try to hock up with a foreigner! at least Momen didnt hide anything.
Egyptians are the best either they were men or women, and I don't blame Momen he found a woman who was desperate for love and he didn't hide his past, he had a website already as you have said with pics of him and other women in his arms! what did you expect! He didn't lie or hide or pretend to be single while he is married with kids or widowed or dating someone!
All women here defend eachother, no matter who is right or wrong, all women here see themselves in MH, most of the women here want to get laid or get involved in a relationship with an Egyptian and when they see a western woman fails they all defend her and try to make the Egyptian side look bad while 90% of women here are full of ****.
MH, YR, m.e., Ana Huna, Locale, Vicky, MissSharm,....etc
Please get your head examined, you need serious and professional help.
Dear Momen, I don't blame you. You didn't fool anyone, you didnt hide your pics with other women and you didnt hide your website, they wanted to be fooled, they wanted to be used, they are so weak to admit that, they were despertaly looking for love that they couldnt find in their homeland.
They were looking for love in a different country, with different language and different traditions.
What are they expecting! The only thing they can get is one night stand with an egyptian or a fucked up relationship and its not only because of the egyptian men but i belive that 60% of the women in ES are white trash and that the main reason they couldnt get a man in their homeland!
Like what i have been reading on ES lately, a married woman hiding her kids and husband(s, an American woman in cairo sleeping around, A british woman came to egypt to marry a kid! 25 years younger than her.....etc
What the hell are you doing! Wakeup Western women on ES, You are scum not The egyptians. I work in Sharm and i see lot of western women, I can tell who is trash and who is not. unfortunatly 60% of the western women in this website are trash!
If you think I am such a decent woman then why did you post this? Because momen did lie, and hide things. And i am sure there are still more lies that i havent discovered. His lies were what caused the problem in our marriage. I was not after sex, i was looking for a good muslim husband, i didnt mind the site because it was before me, he was looking just as i was.... I could have found a man in the states, i had a choice between people, i chose him from his words and actions to me then, i messed up with that for sure. I dont know any more, and i cant care anymore, I have to stop wondering the real reason he did all of this, why he would be so cruel and just concentrate on my current situation and dealing with what he has turned his back on. I will bury myself in Quran and prayer and know that Allah will take me where i belong
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
I didn't make this up! There are some American women in this forum who come to Egypt to sleep around, cheat, lie, deny their families back home!! what do you call this! Are you proud of them! Do you smile when you read about their stories in Egypt! and what do they do to Egyptian men! They are white trash and i am sure a woman who denies her kids and husband and travels to the other half of the world to sleep with Egyptian men, doesn't deserve to live!
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I cant speak for other women, I just know that what happened to me, while it was my choice of a man, was not my fault. I did as a wife should. And Momen is to blame for this. He lied, not me. What the others warned me of, well, he was looking for a wife, sure, i was looking as well. I cant blame him for what he did before me, the blame lies with what was done after our marriage.
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
So nice of you MH and i can feel that you are different than the other white trash american women in this forum. you are not a cheater or liar and you were honest from the start. You will be fine and everything will be okay. time to go to bed goodnight
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
ugh...Who exactly does not deserve to live? Are you referring to someone in particular Pacha_Sanafir? Because it sounded like you were talking about MH.
If you will read the thread carefully you will see that we are not all defending her, nor are we cutting down Egyptian men. There are several here who are very much in love with their Egyptian husband. The last part of the thread has become joking around, thats all, we are just playing.
Did you have a bad experience with an American woman?
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: I didn't make this up! There are some American women in this forum who come to Egypt to sleep around, cheat, lie, deny their families back home!! what do you call this! Are you proud of them! Do you smile when you read about their stories in Egypt! and what do they do to Egyptian men! They are white trash and i am sure a woman who denies her kids and husband and travels to the other half of the world to sleep with Egyptian men, doesn't deserve to live!
where are you from ? you don't even know American women it seems, try looking at all women in general, don't say all American woman.i am not one. my husband is coming sooner then i thought and we have a great marriage, so dont tell me we are all losers pissy :mad:oh i am sorry pache?????????
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
They are white trash and i am sure a woman who denies her kids and husband and travels to the other half of the world to sleep with Egyptian men, doesn't deserve to live!
A bit strong me thinks!! Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
When i read it, it read like he was talking to MH. When she mentioned she was muslim in her next post he changed and turned it on other women! Re-read it thats what it seems to me!
If you are western but muslim you are good if you are not muslim then you are white trash! Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by happybunny: When i read it, it read like he was talking to MH. When she mentioned she was muslim in her next post he changed and turned it on other women! Re-read it thats what it seems to me!
If you are western but muslim you are good if you are not muslim then you are white trash!
sorry that doesn't cut it with me. no one is trash unless your a hooker or the ones i saw in egy. trying to get my husband and bil to take sex for money. its all over the world not just whites Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
So is he defending MH now and degrading Egyptian men? He did specifically mention MH in a previous thread as one of the bad woman.
Maybe I shouldn't hang out with you bad American and English women, y'all are tarnishing my reputation...
.....I did have a good time at the party though, thanks... Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
Maybe I shouldn't hang out with you bad American and English women, y'all are tarnishing my reputation...
....Well as I am Welsh that must make me a good girl!! Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
I feel purrfect then!! Posted by Am I raping your virgin eyes? (Member # 14028) on :
quote:Originally posted by advocate: Maybe I shouldn't hang out with you bad American and English women, y'all are tarnishing my reputation...
....Well as I am Welsh that must make me a good girl!!
dudeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!! why you still up its too late
get back to bed now!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
well i am american and let me tell ya there are trash everywhere yes even trashy egyptian women so plz open yr eyes and dont generalize us cas u dont know us!! i have had men friends that go out every weekend and get laid in egypt with egyptian women!! just cas u dont see it doesnt make it not so!!!!!
Posted by MissNoor (Member # 12549) on :
HUMMM HE IS A SUSPICIOUS CHARACTER!!!!!! HE MUST HAVE BEEN BURNED BY A WOMAN AND IS VENTING...HUMMM
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
I think Pacha is Momen.
Posted by jazzylatin (Member # 14702) on :
think so too
Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
LOL. (doodlebug, your comments on this thread crack me up)
But isnt Pacha's spelling and punctuation and sentence structure,etc, much better than Momen's was?
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
I'll tell ya after Mickey finishes packin' that bong.
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by hibbah: LOL. (doodlebug, your comments on this thread crack me up)
But isnt Pacha's spelling and punctuation and sentence structure,etc, much better than Momen's was?
people can change!!! maybe it is him his a dick anyways!!
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
Pasha isnt momen, he is khaleel. I doubt momen cares enough to respond to this thread anyway. He left her and now he has a new woman-he's moved on. Bottom Line, end of story!!
Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
^^^ ::nods head in agreement:: (Even thought i dont know who khaleel is.)
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
Pretty obvious its the same. Khaleel had a very bad experience and posted about it. Compare it.
Momen doesnt care, mystic wont accept so she posts this thread to get his attention and garner sympathy. She is scripting it like a bad jerry springer episode- pregnancy cliffhanger to get the man's attention and everyone's on ES .
Momen is probably spending less time thinking about it than those on ES
Posted by Am I raping your virgin eyes? (Member # 14028) on :
Pretty obvious its the same. Khaleel had a very bad experience and posted about it. Compare it.
Momen doesnt care, mystic wont accept so she posts this thread to get his attention and garner sympathy. She is scripting it like a bad jerry springer episode- pregnancy cliffhanger to get the man's attention and everyone's on ES .
Momen is probably spending less time thinking about it than those on ES
sad but True
Younger women fine a s s more cash
answer is sorry hun i cant come its all your fault
any how we live to learn my advice is stop thinking about yesterday and think about future
mystic its none of my business and you are most welcome in egypt but wouldn't be better to save some cash for your girl and skip sharm and cairo same time or maybe even try Greece i been there fantastic loved the music and will always do
i dont think its a good idea to come to Egypt that soon after all of that happens
cheers amr
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I made her a promise 2 years ago that she could come to egypt sometime, I have to honor that request. A promise is a promise, i always keep them. No this person is not momen, their typing is way different. The one main difference to watch for is the ' momen never uses it, he always puts the punctuation as it,s instead of it's
Posted by Am I raping your virgin eyes? (Member # 14028) on :
fair enough have u ever been to el ain el sokna or alex mystic there is alot of nice places other then sharm or hurghada
regardless what i think of your x it doesn't matter its all about how u think about it and to be honest its a waste of time to think about it
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: Egypt is the origin and you are just a copy We are the origin of the world and sooner or later America will go down and you will come crawling for our visa and our men and our civilization
This guy is certainly a little too full of himself... Good night, Mister!
Who's Khaleel btw??
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I made her a promise 2 years ago that she could come to egypt sometime, I have to honor that request. A promise is a promise, i always keep them.
Well mystic, you promised your daughter two years ago and guess what she can wait another two years more. You have gone on numerous trips to Egypt in the meantime and never took her.
Don't spend so senseless your hard-earned money! Go with your daughter on a vacation to Disneyland and have some quality time with her on the beach and she'll be more than happy.
Seriously your daughter is just an excuse to come back to Cairo. Why would you wanna travel half around the globe again to a place which brings so much pain to you right now? Let it rest, heal at first and if you wanna visit Egypt again in a couple of years it's fine but for the time-being I think it's the worst idea you could come up with.
Posted by unsure (Member # 12244) on :
I agree totally with Tigerlily.
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
agree with Tigerlilly also. So here's my take on all this. Momen likes to mess about, he met a women who he thought had put up with **** in the past and was a bit of a soft touch so he would give it a try. The try worked, she fell in love, they got married very quick and she was willing to turn a blind eye to the previous attempts of his to find women, she also turned a blind eye to vicki jones etc. So she went on hoping. He went on feeding her titbits, probably liked her too cos she is a likable person, but she started to get too 'in his face', the thing started to become a reality, she was starting to hassle him over things she had previously tried to ignore. He realised that he wasn't going to get away with as much and it started to get on his nerves, he decides better call it a day cos she wants him to be committed and he's not getting away with it all so easily anymore. Because he doesn't wanna put all his eggs in one basket (in case this very thing happens) he continued to make female friendships (because it gives him plan b), at this point when future with Mystic looking too much like hard work he switches to plan b and gets closer to someone else.
Mystic knows all of this and wants to be pregnant because then she will have some control over this situation for once and there will be a 'bond' between them that she thinks will pull him back to her - because she is still hopeful that he will change and she is still happy to ignore the bits she doesnt like. (Even though being pregnant is the worst that could happen in this situation - she will ignore that thought and think it could be rosy)
I think that Pacha is either momen or someone close to him or them, this person knows alot about Mystic and all her friends, and is now being sickly nice to mystic (either out of guilt - momen) or because he wants to be the next mr mystic. O.k maybe its one of Mystic 'men friends'.
Thats my take on it all, although YR is suspiciously quiet.
I dont think Mystic is pregnant and I think that there will be episode 3 very soon probably with a blast from the past that will show her and her daughter 'around egypt' on her next trip - which WILL happen. There are many men waiting in the wings as we all speak, that would be quite happy to take advantage of someone so vulnerable as mystic (given that they know EVERYTHING), and Mystic will be happy to ablige), after she has finished with this thread.
There will be more, dont worry, because she will need to rub Momens nose in it. (and yes even his male pride WILL be bothered by all this, even if he has started to look elsewhere)
Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
Nice analysis Mrs
Pascha
? the new girl who has now moved in with him
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: ugh...Who exactly does not deserve to live? Are you referring to someone in particular Pacha_Sanafir? Because it sounded like you were talking about MH.
If you will read the thread carefully you will see that we are not all defending her, nor are we cutting down Egyptian men. There are several here who are very much in love with their Egyptian husband. The last part of the thread has become joking around, thats all, we are just playing.
Did you have a bad experience with an American woman?
After what I have read in this forum, I have been trying to avoid Americans in general men and women; I wanted to save my self the pain and regrets!
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
One time, in a house that I visited, a man asked me from which country I was. His second question was how my religion was. I answered both the questions. Then he asked if there were many Jews in my country. I didn't feel very comfortable with his clumsy questions in bad English. So, to end the conversation I told him there were not many Jews in my country because the Germans nearly killed them all during the second world war. "Yes there are!!! he started to state, in an accusing way. I just wanted him to back off, told him there were much more Muslims then Jews, but he couldn't stop his accusation and my nationality seemed to be the synonymous of a whole lot of badnesses that were part of this nationality. I Just became confused when he started to talk about sex, then I got angry. He took my nationality as a confirmation to label me as bad, wicked and connected it with his ultimate form of wickedness: jews. At that point my friend suddenly stood behind me told me we were leaving and go home. I was angry. I thought, however the man was from lower classes and clearly bad informed, was very insulting to me. I didn't do anything wrong, just having a certain nationality seemed enough to judge me. This Pacha-character is doing exactly the same. He is labeling a big group of people because of their nationality. He doesn't even know most of them, however I assume he knows one or two, and his opinion is that bad that he has made the same label suitable for every woman with that nationality. To ease himself, he forgets that he also has been part of the likely bad expierences. He makes the behaviours of one nationality completely white and the behaviours of the other nationality completely black. It comforts his bad conscience. It is wiping away all bad what has happened and makes it justified. There will be a logical psychologic exploination for this, it all will be explicable, but at the same time it is wrong. It is wrong and dumb. There are a whole lot wrong and dumb people, in every country of the world. We only have to keep that in mind, and for sure we know all very well, for what we are ourselves. I didn't feel adressed for one moment by the silly statements of Pasha. He obviously will have his own reasons why he is labeling the female part of a collection women as bad. And I think he has been part of them...
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
quote:Originally posted by ?????: One time, in a house that I visited, a man asked me from which country I was. His second question was how my religion was. I answered both the questions. Then he asked if there were many Jews in my country. I didn't feel very comfortable with his clumsy questions in bad English. So, to end the conversation I told him there were not many Jews in my country because the Germans nearly killed them all during the second world war. "Yes there are!!! he started to state, in an accusing way. I just wanted him to back off, told him there were much more Muslims then Jews, but he couldn't stop his accusation and my nationality seemed to be the synonymous of a whole lot of badnesses that were part of this nationality. I Just became confused when he started to talk about sex, then I got angry. He took my nationality as a confirmation to label me as bad, wicked and connected it with his ultimate form of wickedness: jews. At that point my friend suddenly stood behind me told me we were leaving and go home. I was angry. I thought, however the man was from lower classes and clearly bad informed, was very insulting to me. I didn't do anything wrong, just having a certain nationality seemed enough to judge me. This Pacha-character is doing exactly the same. He is labeling a big group of people because of their nationality. He doesn't even know most of them, however I assume he knows one or two, and his opinion is that bad that he has made the same label suitable for every woman with that nationality. To ease himself, he forgets that he also has been part of the likely bad expierences. He makes the behaviours of one nationality completely white and the behaviours of the other nationality completely black. It comforts his bad conscience. It is wiping away all bad what has happened and makes it justified. There will be a logical psychologic exploination for this, it all will be explicable, but at the same time it is wrong. It is wrong and dumb. There are a whole lot wrong and dumb people, in every country of the world. We only have to keep that in mind, and for sure we know all very well, for what we are ourselves. I didn't feel adressed for one moment by the silly statements of Pasha. He obviously will have his own reasons why he is labeling the female part of a collection women as bad. And I think he has been part of them...
Have you heard about any European woman coming to Egypt to sleep around and she is so proud of herself and announcing that in public! or any European woman who hides her family and denies her kids! Only American women do that and i bet they do more but they didn't tell anyone about their other adventures in Egypt! That made me run to the conclusion that 60% only of American women in this forum are trash!
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
well said ????? Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: MH, YR, m.e., Ana Huna, Locale, Vicky, MissSharm,....etc
Pacha, two of these are English. Initially you said western women, not american women. And if you think American women are so bad, how come Mystic is the only one that you are addressing as a 'poor innocent victim' ?
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir:
quote:Originally posted by ?????: One time, in a house that I visited, a man asked me from which country I was. His second question was how my religion was. I answered both the questions. Then he asked if there were many Jews in my country. I didn't feel very comfortable with his clumsy questions in bad English. So, to end the conversation I told him there were not many Jews in my country because the Germans nearly killed them all during the second world war. "Yes there are!!! he started to state, in an accusing way. I just wanted him to back off, told him there were much more Muslims then Jews, but he couldn't stop his accusation and my nationality seemed to be the synonymous of a whole lot of badnesses that were part of this nationality. I Just became confused when he started to talk about sex, then I got angry. He took my nationality as a confirmation to label me as bad, wicked and connected it with his ultimate form of wickedness: jews. At that point my friend suddenly stood behind me told me we were leaving and go home. I was angry. I thought, however the man was from lower classes and clearly bad informed, was very insulting to me. I didn't do anything wrong, just having a certain nationality seemed enough to judge me. This Pacha-character is doing exactly the same. He is labeling a big group of people because of their nationality. He doesn't even know most of them, however I assume he knows one or two, and his opinion is that bad that he has made the same label suitable for every woman with that nationality. To ease himself, he forgets that he also has been part of the likely bad expierences. He makes the behaviours of one nationality completely white and the behaviours of the other nationality completely black. It comforts his bad conscience. It is wiping away all bad what has happened and makes it justified. There will be a logical psychologic exploination for this, it all will be explicable, but at the same time it is wrong. It is wrong and dumb. There are a whole lot wrong and dumb people, in every country of the world. We only have to keep that in mind, and for sure we know all very well, for what we are ourselves. I didn't feel adressed for one moment by the silly statements of Pasha. He obviously will have his own reasons why he is labeling the female part of a collection women as bad. And I think he has been part of them...
Have you heard about any European woman coming to Egypt to sleep around and she is so proud of herself and announcing that in public! or any European woman who hides her family and denies her kids! Only American women do that and i bet they do more but they didn't tell anyone about their other adventures in Egypt! That made me run to the conclusion that 60% only of American women in this forum are trash!
To be honest, I don't know ONE American woman personally, Pasha, but I'm having enough sense to know that your statements are ridiculous. It is as ridiculous as the statements to man made to me, only because I was born in a certain country. Don't get me wrong, you are free to have all the opinions you want. But, at the same time, people will make statements for themselves about you! They are also free in this, you know... Tell me, how do you feel, when I'm telling you my opinion about YOU, as a person, not as an Egyptian man: I think you have been involved with American women, maybe some of your friends have been involved with them too. And they all ended in the same way: dissappointing. Dissappointments are based to your opinion. And to clean up your loaded conscience, you're all make them the bad ones... It doesn't matter to me!!! To me you are free to get involved with women from every nationality of the world, with Americans, with Germans, with Italians, with Russians, whatever. But at the same time, be very well aware of the fact, that you shouldn't. You shouldn't fool them. You shouldn't fool whatever kind of women. And if there suddenly women appear that are behaving in the same way as men are doing to them, it must be quite shocking to you. There are women that are fooling men, just like men to the same to women.... Yes, there are! In America, in Europe and in Egypt too. Egypt also has their part of bad women, and by expierence I even recognise them. But I am not going that far that I am labeling parts of an society as bad.
Posted by Dalia* (Member # 10593) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: Have you heard about any European woman coming to Egypt to sleep around and she is so proud of herself and announcing that in public! or any European woman who hides her family and denies her kids!
What about Egyptian guys who get married to an American or European woman while hiding the fact that they already have an Egyptian wife? What about the wifes who play along with it, pretending to be a sister or some other relative? Please don't tell us you've never heard of that. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I made her a promise 2 years ago that she could come to egypt sometime, I have to honor that request. A promise is a promise, i always keep them. \
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
I am talking about ES members, i have never heard of those men on ES. That's what we read on ES: "American woman sleeping around" "American woman doing taxi drivers" "American woman denying her kids and family" "American woman leaving her kids to sleep around in Egypt" "American woman sleeping with more than one ES member" "American woman taking nude pictures of herself, with a water bottle in her !!!!!" lol
Dalia, what do you call those women? Angels!
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
MysticHeart, do you kids a favour, tell your daughter you cant take her to Egypt because it wouldn't be much fun for you as you have now split up from Momen. Tell her that long distance relationships are not much fun and can end like this because people dont get to know each other very well. Tell her that it is natural, some relationships last, some dont, and that because of this relationship YOU HAVE LEARNT that it is much better to take it slow and get to know someone really well before you decide to get married. Then ask her where else she would like to go.
If you do all that she may have a hope of seeing reality instead of getting mixed up in all this 'fly accross the world' for a romance relationship. Tell her the relationship is over, and you are gonna pick yourself up and dust yourself off and get on with life because life is bigger than Momen. Maybe then she will do the same when her internet relationships fail.
Pacha, please answer this:
quote:Originally posted by Mrs:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: MH, YR, m.e., Ana Huna, Locale, Vicky, MissSharm,....etc
Pacha, two of these are English. Initially you said western women, not american women. And if you think American women are so bad, how come Mystic is the only one that you are addressing as a 'poor innocent victim' ?
there are women that NEVER talk about their sex life, Myself, Dalia, Smuckers, Ayisha, Newcomer, SWYS, I'm sure many more but cant list here.
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: I am talking about ES members, i have never heard of those men on ES. That's what we read on ES: "American woman sleeping around" "American woman doing taxi drivers" "American woman denying her kids and family" "American woman leaving her kids to sleep around in Egypt" "American woman sleeping with more than one ES member" "American woman taking nude pictures of herself, with a water bottle in her !!!!!" lol
Dalia, what do you call those women? Angels!
all the above are false for me. i am an American with a wonderful Egyptian husband. i think you are talking about 1 woman here, we are all not bad. and well respected thank you.so please limit your self to who you are referring, i am not one Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
quote:Originally posted by MICKY A:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: I am talking about ES members, i have never heard of those men on ES. That's what we read on ES: "American woman sleeping around" "American woman doing taxi drivers" "American woman denying her kids and family" "American woman leaving her kids to sleep around in Egypt" "American woman sleeping with more than one ES member" "American woman taking nude pictures of herself, with a water bottle in her !!!!!" lol
Dalia, what do you call those women? Angels!
all the above are false for me. i am an American with a wonderful Egyptian husband. i think you are talking about 1 woman here, we are all not bad. and well respected thank you.so please limit your self to who you are referring, i am not one
Micky A, I said some American women, I didn't generalize. BTW, I wanna see those nude pictures of that member lol I have read that there was a water bottle in her P****y!
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
why?you don't want to see that. its disgusting and its been deleted anyway .we don't need that filth on here
what do you call this then' Have you heard about any European woman coming to Egypt to sleep around and she is so proud of herself and announcing that in public! or any European woman who hides her family and denies her kids! Only American women do that and i bet they do more but they didn't tell anyone about their other adventures in Egypt! That made me run to the conclusion that 60% only of American women in this forum are trash!
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: MH, YR, m.e., Ana Huna, Locale, Vicky, MissSharm,....etc
Pacha, two of these are English. Initially you said western women, not american women. And if you think American women are so bad, how come Mystic is the only one that you are addressing as a 'poor innocent victim' ?
echo...echo...echo
is there anyone there?...there?...there?
Pacha...Pacha...Pacha
... ... Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
I cant believe that any woman can take a nude pic with a water bottle in her P***Y! She must be sick! Do you think a sane woman will ever do that! Wasn't she American! lol I want to see her sick pictures, Does anyone have the pictures?
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Pacha, There are stereotypes (as ????? said) about nationalities. Not long ago there was a thread about Russians.There are bad AND good people in each society. You only look at some fraction of society - don't generalize, please!
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
I still want to see the pervert pictures of the American woman on ES lol
Posted by Dalia* (Member # 10593) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: I am talking about ES members, i have never heard of those men on ES. That's what we read on ES: "American woman sleeping around" "American woman doing taxi drivers" "American woman denying her kids and family" "American woman leaving her kids to sleep around in Egypt" "American woman sleeping with more than one ES member" "American woman taking nude pictures of herself, with a water bottle in her !!!!!" lol
Dalia, what do you call those women? Angels!
Maybe you haven't been around long enough. I've also read about:
Egyptian men sleeping around Egyptian men denying / hiding their kids and family Egyptian men leaving their family to sleep around with women in the resorts Egyptian men sleeping with more than one ES member Egyptian men taking nude pictures of themselves and sending pictures of their private parts to forum members
So what's the point? ES is not the real world, ya pacha; the Egyptian men you meet on here or read about are not representative of all Egyptians; and neither are the women you meet in the resorts looking for an adventure, representative of all Americans.
You need to get out into the real world and not take all your knowledge from what you read on an internet board or experience in a holiday resort!
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
Some American women encourage Egyptian men to sleep with them, I don't blame Egyptians, American women sleep with anyone in Egypt. They even do taxi drivers and labors! What do you call a woman inserting a water bottle in her P****y? What do you call an American woman sleeping with taxi drivers? what do you call an American woman sleeping with more than one member here? A Goddess! An American Goddess lol
Posted by Dalia* (Member # 10593) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: Some American women encourage Egyptian men to sleep with them, I don't blame Egyptians
I do since it's their choice. Or are you suggesting all those ladies forced the poor guys into having sex with them?
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
I found the picture with the water bottle lol A nice lady sent me the link, I didn't find the pictures sexy at all! It's disgusting and she is ugly! maybe that's the only way she can hock up with men by stripping!!
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: What do you call...
...a sleeze who chases after internet porno while pretending to be so pious and moral? Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
quote:Originally posted by newcomer:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: What do you call...newcomer?
...a sleeze who chases after internet porno while pretending to be so pious and moral?
newcomer, thanks for introducing your self to the world.
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir:
quote:Originally posted by newcomer:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: What do you call...
...a sleeze who chases after internet porno while pretending to be so pious and moral?
newcomer, I didn't ask about you! I was asking about the American women who ... No need to tell us about your self now! but thanks anyways
I am not taking it personally, as nothing you have said relates to me; I just find your blinkered, prejudiced view of the world and how you relate to it narrow and lacking in insight into your position in it.
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir:
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: ugh...Who exactly does not deserve to live? Are you referring to someone in particular Pacha_Sanafir? Because it sounded like you were talking about MH.
If you will read the thread carefully you will see that we are not all defending her, nor are we cutting down Egyptian men. There are several here who are very much in love with their Egyptian husband. The last part of the thread has become joking around, thats all, we are just playing.
Did you have a bad experience with an American woman?
After what I have read in this forum, I have been trying to avoid Americans in general men and women; I wanted to save my self the pain and regrets!
I completely understand where you are coming from. I too had a bad impression from this forum except my bad impression was about Egyptians and Muslims. Sometimes the things I read that Egyptians and Muslims do made me cry.
- I read about how Egyptian men lie, steal, cheat, have sex with a different Russian woman every day, marry woman for visa then dump them once they get it.
- I read how the woman take it from behind to save their virginity, and that there are virgin prostitutes.
- I read how Muslims have sex with children, how they sell their young daughters to much older men for marriage.
- How young boys are used for sex and it is thought that it is just something that they will outgrow.
- I read how they don't think it is being gay if they are on top.
- I read about honor killings; about stoning woman who were raped; about how Muslims are suppose to kill anyone who is not of their religion.
- I read how in Islam rape is OK if she is not Muslim or is a slave or wife.
- I have read on ES about oppression of women and all kinds of crimes against humanity from Muslims.
I could probably think of more but I am sure this is enough for you to get the point.
Honestly, at first I thought that all the bad we hear and see in the media about Muslims is true. The problem was that I have Muslim friends and they don't act like this. It did take me some time to come to terms with what I was reading on ES.
I do know that I have dear Muslim friends who are not represented by the actions of Muslims or Egyptians that I have read about on ES. For all I know all other Egyptians and Muslims except my friends have this bad character but I couldn't deny my friendships because of what I read here.
Sometimes what we read in concentration can be over whelming to the point that we think it is the whole culture. The fact is that bad things happen in all cultures but not all people in a culture are involved in the bad things.
Maybe you should become friends with an American and see that we are not all like what you have read. Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
I dont have Americans friends but I would love to meet a stable and nice americans not sick ones.
Posted by Dalia* (Member # 10593) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: I cant believe that any woman can take a nude pic with a water bottle in her P***Y! She must be sick! Do you think a sane woman will ever do that! Wasn't she American! lol
I can't believe that any man would want to look at a pic of a woman with a water bottle inside of her. He must be sick! Do you think a sane guy will ever do that! Wasn't he Egyptian! lol
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
In the end, all Pacha's statements were just an excuse to find what he has been looking for : dirty pictures. He must have heard about them, became curious, placed some ridiculous arguments why a whole group should be bad, nad somebody is also stupid enough to give him an url where he can find the dirt he is so keen on. In the meanwhile he is preaching... If you should practise what you preach, Pasha, you should keep yourself far away from all what's dirty and bad. The repeating message in your posts was just a pornographic picture... a dribbling piece of the famous two-faced hypocrites.
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
Why do you have such a picture on your profile? You say that you want to meet nice people yet you have a picture like that on your profile? Maybe you are not a nice person.
Not good PS. Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
I didn't even look at his profile, otherwise I even shouldn't have answered. What a sick bastard...
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
I wanted to show you how pervert and sick American women can get? and i will keep this picture as a proof that you defend dirty, cheap and insane women that you have never met before and accuse Egyptian men just because they are Egyptians! you stand beside the western women whether they are wrong or right!
This woman with the water bottle, i assume, is living in a trailer, she is a white trash and she doesn't have a degree or a job! She might be a stripper! Don't tell me anyone forced her to dip a bottle in her p****Y and take a picture as low as this picture! this proves that she is nothing but a sharmouta!
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
...and what does it prove about you? Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
There are lots of pictures like that all over the internet Pacha, you are really not proving anything, and if men like you were not looking at pictures like that then they wouldnt even exist. Grow up, you are making yourself look very childish
Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
Is that a pepsi bottle ?
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
Those are the links i got! Are those pictures for the american member here or wrong ones!
I am soooooo not clicking on those links!
Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vader: Is that a pepsi bottle ?
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
Why! I wanna know if that's the woman on ES who is sleeping around or someone else! May be she will try to contact me! I dont want to get involved with her, she is married and has a family for gods sake! Are those pictures for the right person or someone kidding with me?!
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: I wanted to show you how pervert and sick American women can get? and i will keep this picture as a proof that you defend dirty, cheap and insane women that you have never met before and accuse Egyptian men just because they are Egyptians! you stand beside the western women whether they are wrong or right!
This woman with the water bottle, i assume, is living in a trailer, she is a white trash and she doesn't have a degree or a job! She might be a stripper! Don't tell me anyone forced her to dip a bottle in her p****Y and take a picture as low as this picture! this proves that she is nothing but a sharmouta!
Sure, keep them in your profile and at the same time tell everybody that you are interesting in meeting decent American women. No decent woman shall be interested in meeting YOU, or is that to hard to understand? But, of course I prefer it this way, it's more clear to the members. They now know exactly who they are dealing with...
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Why dont you just come right out and be honest Mr Pacha.
Anyway, if you get any women contacting you its simple, just ask if she is wearing a baseball cap? then you will know if its her or not
Just be very suspicious of a women who says she cant remember where she left her drink...
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
Those are the links i got! Are those pictures for the american member here or wrong ones!
They not the same people and why you print with babies not so nice to invade and bring children in it .
Posted by Dalia* (Member # 10593) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: This woman with the water bottle, i assume, is living in a trailer, she is a white trash and she doesn't have a degree or a job! She might be a stripper! Don't tell me anyone forced her to dip a bottle in her p****Y and take a picture as low as this picture! this proves that she is nothing but a sharmouta!
Wow, aren't you smart!
You can find tons of similar pictures of Egyptian and Arab women ... so you are just making yourself look like an idiot with your *proofs*.
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
Those pics are for the same woman but i think after the plastic surgeries it's hard to tell those pictures are for the same woman!!
Posted by Pacha_Sanafir (Member # 15024) on :
Now you forget abpout the main issue, Momen and MH... ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Have a great day!
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Plastic Surgeries!!!! ROFL
did she get the bottle stuck then?
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Personally, I don't believe some nice lady sent you theses pics! I think you're the ex just trying to cause as much humiliation as possible!
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
I still smell a momen, anyone else notice how he said 'momen and MH' not mystic, or MH and momen, he said momen first, yet really this post was more about Mystic.
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Hey Mrs, you're old nag is still here, lowering the tone of the neighbourhood! Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Thats a quality nag it will bring good to your trailer, if you leave her there and feed her..and me, wanna buy some lace?
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Now i'm confused who is the ugly woman with the pepsi bottle? Is she somebody from ES and why are those things posted on here? Oh my god maybe i had to much hash last night at the party!!!!!!! Can somebody explain please? Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
It's the hash Habeeby, go back to sleep dear, its all a bad dream...
Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
PEPSIIIII
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
By the way to the person who tidied up after the party, a BIG thankyou, the place hasn't looked this good in years Mrs do you want beans or eh beans? The choice is yours. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: Pasha isnt momen, he is khaleel. I doubt momen cares enough to respond to this thread anyway. He left her and now he has a new woman-he's moved on. Bottom Line, end of story!!
Sure on spot.Formerly known as Yanal. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs: Plastic Surgeries!!!! ROFL
did she get the bottle stuck then?
ROFL Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
and mazen, I think.
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
and J.D. or is it Man That You Fear?Lol
But on his e-mail he is Candyass... I know this because i blocked him His specility is asking you to come on line with webcam wearing your bikini while he jacks off Nice guy eh?
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Ooh nice Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Dont worry habeeby, he wont need you to go on line in a bikini, he has lots of pictures to keep him company on those warm cosy nights now.
Just him and ms pebsi, love is in the air
YAH, I'l take beans wi me beans, do you wanna buy a car? I found one last night?
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
I think we should give him new ES name - Mr Stickyhands... Lol Oooooh i feel quite sick now... Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: Have you heard about any European woman coming to Egypt to sleep around and she is so proud of herself and announcing that in public! or any European woman who hides her family and denies her kids! Only American women do that and i bet they do more but they didn't tell anyone about their other adventures in Egypt! That made me run to the conclusion that 60% only of American women in this forum are trash!
|Yes I heard about them, have you heard of how many egyptians are trying to get money or visa by sleeping with anyone, man or woman? shall we put a percentage on that?
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Yes please Ayisha... let's take a vote i say 89.5% - any advance on that????? Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
eewww just seen the pic on sadarses profile, ya sick bast!!
anyone notice the bottle was upside down? or was it me
Vader its not bebsi dont worry Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: By the way to the person who tidied up after the party, a BIG thankyou, the place hasn't looked this good in years Mrs do you want beans or eh beans? The choice is yours.
I just made hashbrowns with poached eggs, belgium waffles and fresh coffee if anyone's hungry. I know it's not white trash friendly food but it's still good!
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Habeeby: and J.D. or is it Man That You Fear?Lol
But on his e-mail he is Candyass... I know this because i blocked him His specility is asking you to come on line with webcam wearing your bikini while he jacks off Nice guy eh?
He`s all the same one.A one-man band.Yeah,Mazen is another of his nicks. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: Have you heard about any European woman coming to Egypt to sleep around and she is so proud of herself and announcing that in public! or any European woman who hides her family and denies her kids! Only American women do that and i bet they do more but they didn't tell anyone about their other adventures in Egypt! That made me run to the conclusion that 60% only of American women in this forum are trash!
|Yes I heard about them, have you heard of how many egyptians are trying to get money or visa by sleeping with anyone, man or woman? shall we put a percentage on that?
Yeah,i read of those,too.But as Smuckers mentioned previously there are 2 flat sides to a pancake....Smuckers,did i quote you correctly??? Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Doodle i would like some please
*Habeeby ties her napkin around her neck and waits expectantly*
Posted by Dalia* (Member # 10593) on :
quote:Originally posted by Habeeby: But on his e-mail he is Candyass...
Oh, that one! ROFL ... Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: I found the picture with the water bottle lol A nice lady sent me the link, I didn't find the pictures sexy at all! It's disgusting and she is ugly! maybe that's the only way she can hock up with men by stripping!!
God what's going on here? Who was on the pic? Not one of the ES girls, was it??!!
Alright.... I just saw them!! Listen you Schmuck if one person is trailer trash than it's you because you post that crap here on this forum.
Go and play with your wohres you loser! Yalla get lost, sick person you!!
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
*napkin tied round neck, knife and fork at ready*
pass it over doodle, im starving, been watching hubby cleaning the flat all day, well I helped a bit Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by Tigerlily:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: I found the picture with the water bottle lol A nice lady sent me the link, I didn't find the pictures sexy at all! It's disgusting and she is ugly! maybe that's the only way she can hock up with men by stripping!!
God what's going on here? Who was on the pic? Not one of the ES girls, was it??!!
Alright.... I just saw them!! Listen you Schmuck if one person is trailer trash than it's you because you post that crap here on this forum.
Go and play with your wohres you loser! Yalla get lost, sick person you!!
He says his occupation is in the leisure industry. Leisure is what people can do in their free time, but what's leisure industry?
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
The beans will keep till tomorrow! Count me in Doodle better keep some for Mrs or she'll be P.....d to miss out. Has the car got a good sound system, ie very loud Mrs, if so I'm interested Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Yeah ????? my thoughts exactly and picking user name of a night club, very pious I'm sure!!!
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
Get God Pasha!!
Allah will help you with your inner struggle!!
Porn is Bad, it is for sinners and freaks with damaged souls. The truth is out there brother, find it!!
By the way, Do you have the Coconut Dieties playing at your club??? Really Fab band , you should book them!!
Leisure Industry is a good career path and I wish you much success in your endeavors to making your way in life with booze and prostitutes
Remember : "Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away "
"One by one those pesky little garden gnomes are stealing my sanity, someone please shoot the little b*stards"
Drugs are Bad!! Step away from the Bong!!
*Words of wisdom from Rumi** Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Pasha is indeed a nightclub and sanafir means meeting-place in Arabic. Also, there is a Sanafir-hotel in Sharm,also known as Hotel Pacha, it's a wannabe Ibiza hotel, with lots of ( house and R&B)parties. Egyptians use to call it Hotel Saracir ( Hotel cockroach)
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir:
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: ugh...Who exactly does not deserve to live? Are you referring to someone in particular Pacha_Sanafir? Because it sounded like you were talking about MH.
If you will read the thread carefully you will see that we are not all defending her, nor are we cutting down Egyptian men. There are several here who are very much in love with their Egyptian husband. The last part of the thread has become joking around, thats all, we are just playing.
Did you have a bad experience with an American woman?
After what I have read in this forum, I have been trying to avoid Americans in general men and women; I wanted to save my self the pain and regrets!
thank god arent we the lucky ones!!!
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
They made me do it Rumi... I was perfectly happy just breathing the smoke filled air...
You know what peer pressure can do...
I would like some belgium waffles, with strawberries please. Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
i also find it funny out of all the women in this forum that are american he attracts only the nasty bottled women hahahahaha he was ousted by an american woman now he wanna come to this forum and take out his frustrations on us. hhhhhhhhhhhhhha i think not yr so ignorant u cant see that not all women are the same!!! oooo and fyi when u do marry an egyptian woman dude 10 to 1 u aint her first!!!
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Gold, don't you remember dancing on the roof of my wonderful home???????????????.I think Habeby was up there with you!!
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8:
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: Pasha isnt momen, he is khaleel. I doubt momen cares enough to respond to this thread anyway. He left her and now he has a new woman-he's moved on. Bottom Line, end of story!!
Sure on spot.Formerly known as Yanal.
Same suspicion i came to lastnight, Yanal. For one reason, in nearly every post he mentions a specific person, m.e., And its obvious now of course as the posts have concentrated on her and posting her pictures again. Yanal, leave her alone, isnt the time you just spent in the egyptian jail over all this enough? Or do you prefer you end up there again?
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: They made me do it Rumi... I was perfectly happy just breathing the smoke filled air...
You know what peer pressure can do...
I would like some belgium waffles, with strawberries please.
The only good thing about this thread is that the belgian waffles get mentioned all the time .
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Young it is not the first time i have danced on a roof and i hope it won't be the last and as for Gold she was up there before me Lol Gold it was not peer pressure you were the leader girl..... OMG you are a dark horse
Mystic are you saying those horrid pictures were of m.e.? Why would any woman degrade herself this way? No wonder he did not respect her!!! What kind of man would she expect to attract with this type of picture? I think the type that she got Destiny is lthe name of a boat on the nile and we are the captains of our own boats ladies... Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Well Habeeby, you and Gold need to come and get the dents out of my roof asap, the JD is chilling for your arrival Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
who is m.e ???
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
I am not sure but I think she is the one with the strange storage room for the water bottle.
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
ok, I found her posts now, she seems quite sane to me. Well its up to her what she does with her body, she must have sent the pics to someone not put them up for the world to see, so that makes the person who put them up the sleaze, she's not really done anything wrong has she. AND she's pregnant? and by this guy who is putting up the private pics?
He should be so ashamed!! and what does any of this have to do with LML? I noticed she poked her nose in?
How did I miss this?? Mystic, you have to hand this thread over now this deserves another 10 pages, this M-A-Z-E-N is just a teensy bit bitter and twisted!
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
OMG I sooo should NOT have clicked on those pictures. Why would anyone send naked pictures of themselves to ANYONE on the internet????????? Good Lord this is going to take some serious work to get those images out of my head. Curiosity did kill a cat and I think it's going to be the end of me!!! blech blehc blech blech blech blech!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by cloudberry (Member # 11163) on :
These kind of writers you just cannot take seriously, a person using even a bit of his or hers brains don’t think this way. (I’m not American but I find this kind of thinking repulsive.)
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: They are white trash and i am sure a woman who denies her kids and husband and travels to the other half of the world to sleep with Egyptian men, doesn't deserve to live!
Ok, some of the Egyptians may not travel to the other end of the world, but if you think that for example these Luxor guys (NOT all, but unfortunately many!) not to mentions guys in Red Sea area are doing is OK. If so, oh well what can you say...typical brainless men thinking around here. Men can do anything (even if its immoral or against the Egyptian law) but when women are concerned...hmm. If you do not act like this it doesn’t mean there aren't too many men that do (in Egypt and elsewhere). These men here lie they are not married and are very proud of what they are doing.
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: After what I have read in this forum, I have been trying to avoid Americans in general men and women; I wanted to save my self the pain and regrets!
Could I say: “After what I have read in this forum, I have been trying to avoid Egyptians in general, men and women; I wanted to save myself the pain and regrets!” (But I don’t think all the men are bad, any wise person could not think like this about any nationality.) Few women are also capable of scamming you, although tiny things like asking 20 LE for a package of gum in a shop.
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: Some American women encourage Egyptian men to sleep with them, I don't blame Egyptians, American women sleep with anyone in Egypt. They even do taxi drivers and labors!
And what about some tourist area guys????? They are chasing you thinking you find them attractive or respectable (NOT!!!!!!!!!) as they would be God’s gifts on earth to women. They sleep with anyone with money or anyone with a skirt, no matter how old etc.
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: I dont have Americans friends but I would love to meet a stable and nice americans not sick ones.
Oh I wish this too. But nice Luxorian people, thanks. I don’t have any respect for the most guys working in touristic field here. Still I would *never* say all Egyptians are trash.
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: Have you heard about any European woman coming to Egypt to sleep around and she is so proud of herself and announcing that in public! or any European woman who hides her family and denies her kids! Only American women do that and i bet they do more but they didn't tell anyone about their other adventures in Egypt! That made me run to the conclusion that 60% only of American women in this forum are trash!
|Yes I heard about them, have you heard of how many egyptians are trying to get money or visa by sleeping with anyone, man or woman? shall we put a percentage on that?
Ayisha, again I think it’s the case of putting men above women, men can do this, women cannot!
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir:
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: ugh...Who exactly does not deserve to live? Are you referring to someone in particular Pacha_Sanafir? Because it sounded like you were talking about MH.
If you will read the thread carefully you will see that we are not all defending her, nor are we cutting down Egyptian men. There are several here who are very much in love with their Egyptian husband. The last part of the thread has become joking around, thats all, we are just playing.
Did you have a bad experience with an American woman?
After what I have read in this forum, I have been trying to avoid Americans in general men and women; I wanted to save my self the pain and regrets!
thank god arent we the lucky ones!!!
rock on Tina! ROFL!!! Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
What's with everyone having snarling tiger avatars. SRSLY choose new ones.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by desertgirl: I am not sure but I think she is the one with the strange storage room for the water bottle.
ROFL Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vader: What's with everyone having snarling tiger avatars. SRSLY choose new ones.
what's wrong with a tiger? dr. vader?
Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
Nothing really, but can't anybody choose a new one ? We have like 10 of them already.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
Mystic,dear,it`s about time you gather up all your broken pieces together and move on,since this Y-Anal took over your thread as a sorry excuse for shoving us again and repeatedly those private pics into our eyes, i kinda guess this thread will be deleted pretty soon. But well,at least we had some fun,too partied and danced on Young At Heart`s rooftop,and pulled together a sold out 40% of still remaining non-trash Western women. Posted by Khaleel (Member # 14859) on :
Pretty obvious its the same. Khaleel had a very bad experience and posted about it. Compare it.
pretty obvious there are lot of smartladies on here.ok.im a troll.ihve nothing in life to do then just loging onto es by differant names.i enter by the id&pw of khaleel then log out to use the id&pw of snafir.then creat a new mail to log in by the id&pw of mazen.then in midnight shows im using the mail,id,and pw of man that you fear.yanal is myoldest name but np i might think of using it again cause it iscool.j'd fit mymood more in mornings.who else ladies is me.pls remind me cause my sick minded not helping me to remember all my ids
ok.i willnot go with you too far lady not for anything axcept that i respect your man.
but tell me.doyou hve more strong proof then jst guessing.didyou meet me in real or even saw my picture.are you having my id or my pasport.did you meet me before in your country??!!!!
why then im a troll.but you.sashyra.swys.mk for instance are not the same person?
quote: Originally posted by Sashyra8:
Sure on spot.Formerly known as Yanal.
pheeeew.awwww.you amazes me detective shashyra.sureyou are working for fbi.arent you detective.so very smart.sure on spot Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
how shall we decide who has to change??
Posted by Khaleel (Member # 14859) on :
one more question.shouldnt you ladies get some life.the thread almost 16 pages.!!!!!!!!!!!!!no wonder.it seem thatmany find lot of fun in gossip about others life to feel better about their life.youall attacked mystic cause she wrote her personal info onpublic.but didnt you help her more to keep doing as long as you keep help this thread growing everymmnt Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
Pretty obvious its the same. Khaleel had a very bad experience and posted about it. Compare it.
pretty obvious there are lot of smartladies on here.ok.im a troll.ihve nothing in life to do then just loging onto es by differant names.i enter by the id&pw of khaleel then log out to use the id&pw of snafir.then creat a new mail to log in by the id&pw of mazen.then in midnight shows im using the mail,id,and pw of man that you fear.yanal is myoldest name but np i might think of using it again cause it iscool.j'd fit mymood more in mornings.who else ladies is me.pls remind me cause my sick minded not helping me to remember all my ids
ok.i willnot go with you too far lady not for anything axcept that i respect your man.
but tell me.doyou hve more strong proof then jst guessing.didyou meet me in real or even saw my picture.are you having my id or my pasport.did you meet me before in your country??!!!!
why then im a troll.but you.sashyra.swys.mk for instance are not the same person?
quote: Originally posted by Sashyra8:
Sure on spot.Formerly known as Yanal.
pheeeew.awwww.you amazes me detective shashyra.sureyou are working for fbi.arent you detective.so very smart.sure on spot
hmmm, interesting that you just popped up out the woodwork...
Posted by Mrs (Member # 14656) on :
Khaleel, dont worry, your not pacha, its o.k you haven't been typing in your sleep
Now be a good boy and change your avator to a tiger
Come on white trash, lets all be tigers Posted by Khaleel (Member # 14859) on :
Pretty obvious its the same. Khaleel had a very bad experience and posted about it. Compare it.
pretty obvious there are lot of smartladies on here.ok.im a troll.ihve nothing in life to do then just loging onto es by differant names.i enter by the id&pw of khaleel then log out to use the id&pw of snafir.then creat a new mail to log in by the id&pw of mazen.then in midnight shows im using the mail,id,and pw of man that you fear.yanal is myoldest name but np i might think of using it again cause it iscool.j'd fit mymood more in mornings.who else ladies is me.pls remind me cause my sick minded not helping me to remember all my ids
ok.i willnot go with you too far lady not for anything axcept that i respect your man.
but tell me.doyou hve more strong proof then jst guessing.didyou meet me in real or even saw my picture.are you having my id or my pasport.did you meet me before in your country??!!!!
why then im a troll.but you.sashyra.swys.mk for instance are not the same person?
quote: Originally posted by Sashyra8:
Sure on spot.Formerly known as Yanal.
pheeeew.awwww.you amazes me detective shashyra.sureyou are working for fbi.arent you detective.so very smart.sure on spot
hmmm, interesting that you just popped up out the woodwork...
sure.im a troll.thought it is pretty obvious.no?? Posted by vader. (Member # 14656) on :
NOW your confused Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<why then im a troll.but you.sashyra.swys.mk for instance are not the same person?>
Looollllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll....ROFL
That was a good one,Khaleel!!!!
Good Lord...you sure need to polish your skills!
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
There is only one Vader!! Now we have 2 of them??? (I did NOT touch the other girls' whisky!)
Who changed her name to vader.? Mrs?? Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
of gold lmao can just picture it now Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs: MysticHeart, do you kids a favour, tell your daughter you cant take her to Egypt because it wouldn't be much fun for you as you have now split up from Momen. Tell her that long distance relationships are not much fun and can end like this because people dont get to know each other very well. Tell her that it is natural, some relationships last, some dont, and that because of this relationship YOU HAVE LEARNT that it is much better to take it slow and get to know someone really well before you decide to get married. Then ask her where else she would like to go.
If you do all that she may have a hope of seeing reality instead of getting mixed up in all this 'fly accross the world' for a romance relationship. Tell her the relationship is over, and you are gonna pick yourself up and dust yourself off and get on with life because life is bigger than Momen. Maybe then she will do the same when her internet relationships fail.
Pacha, please answer this:
quote:Originally posted by Mrs:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: MH, YR, m.e., Ana Huna, Locale, Vicky, MissSharm,....etc
Pacha, two of these are English. Initially you said western women, not american women. And if you think American women are so bad, how come Mystic is the only one that you are addressing as a 'poor innocent victim' ?
there are women that NEVER talk about their sex life, Myself, Dalia, Smuckers, Ayisha, Newcomer, SWYS, I'm sure many more but cant list here.
I'm American and you can add me to your list of those who don't speak of their sex life online.
Posted by Dalia* (Member # 10593) on :
quote:Originally posted by doodlebug: I just made hashbrowns with poached eggs, belgium waffles and fresh coffee if anyone's hungry. I know it's not white trash friendly food but it's still good!
I LOVE hashed browns, is there any left?
I think I need to seriously work on putting on some weight, the last taxi drivers I encountered didn't seem too excited about me. I'm thinking about switching to bauwabs, but they seem to prefer well-rounded ladies with hijab.
Maybe I should just go to Sharm, they seem to be less picky there!!! Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bonzo:
quote:Originally posted by Mrs: MysticHeart, do you kids a favour, tell your daughter you cant take her to Egypt because it wouldn't be much fun for you as you have now split up from Momen. Tell her that long distance relationships are not much fun and can end like this because people dont get to know each other very well. Tell her that it is natural, some relationships last, some dont, and that because of this relationship YOU HAVE LEARNT that it is much better to take it slow and get to know someone really well before you decide to get married. Then ask her where else she would like to go.
If you do all that she may have a hope of seeing reality instead of getting mixed up in all this 'fly accross the world' for a romance relationship. Tell her the relationship is over, and you are gonna pick yourself up and dust yourself off and get on with life because life is bigger than Momen. Maybe then she will do the same when her internet relationships fail.
Pacha, please answer this:
quote:Originally posted by Mrs:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: MH, YR, m.e., Ana Huna, Locale, Vicky, MissSharm,....etc
Pacha, two of these are English. Initially you said western women, not american women. And if you think American women are so bad, how come Mystic is the only one that you are addressing as a 'poor innocent victim' ?
there are women that NEVER talk about their sex life, Myself, Dalia, Smuckers, Ayisha, Newcomer, SWYS, I'm sure many more but cant list here.
I'm American and you can add me to your list of those who don't speak of their sex life online.
Add me here,toooo!!!!! Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: Some American women encourage Egyptian men to sleep with them, I don't blame Egyptians, American women sleep with anyone in Egypt. They even do taxi drivers and labors! What do you call a woman inserting a water bottle in her P****y? What do you call an American woman sleeping with taxi drivers? what do you call an American woman sleeping with more than one member here? A Goddess! An American Goddess lol
Why don't you just name the person you're speaking of instead of generalizing about nationality?
That's just plain ignorant to do otherwise. Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dalia*: I think I need to seriously work on putting on some weight, the last taxi drivers I encountered didn't seem too excited about me. I'm thinking about switching to bauwabs, but they seem to prefer well-rounded ladies with hijab.
Maybe I should just go to Sharm, they seem to be less picky there!!!
Too funny, Dahlia*
Just when I think it can't get any worse on this forum, it does.
Pascha, you need to get a life. I think you've been rejected by one too many American women and you are a man scorned. You're probably jealous because the American women on this board who you accuse of being loose won't give you the time of day. Even women with pepsi bottles have higher standards! Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir:
MH, YR, m.e., Ana Huna, Locale, Vicky, MissSharm,....etc
Pacha, two of these are English. Initially you said western women, not american women. And if you think American women are so bad, how come Mystic is the only one that you are addressing as a 'poor innocent victim' ? --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
there are women that NEVER talk about their sex life, Myself, Dalia, Smuckers, Ayisha, Newcomer, SWYS, I'm sure many more but cant list here. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'm American and you can add me to your list of those who don't speak of their sex life online. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- and me too!!! Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
i am american and let me tell u somethin!! for one i would never ever let a man like you talk to me in that way !!! u for sure would get a fist upside yr narrow minded head so what a woman used u and what ever else!! doesnt make us all sluts whores and what ever trash but fyi most american women wont even give u the time of day!!! hahahaha u make me laugh!!!! i dont care even if i was 50 yr old or more no man talks to me that way in real life never has and never will!! we can kick ur asses in usa so now what are we?for defendin ourselves???
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
Pacha anyone with 1/2 a brain can see that it is not the same woman in those photos!
You keep saying how sick she is, how bad she is etc well why don't you shut the **** up about her! Why come on here and ask if people has the photos? You sure are sick!
No one knows who this women is right? lets not say it is m.e because some idiot makes it sound like it is. You know anyone can type in a name of someone and say it is them (eg it is "lostinlove") because not many of us know what eachother look like. Then everyone will start thinking it is lostinlove.
This guy has come here to start problems for the girl in the bottom 2 photos and is trying to convince us that the top photos are her. That sure is sad, YOU Pacha are sad.
I also think it is MAZEN
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
Yeah what is going on with vader and Mrs posts? I read them one time and they are vader, now they have turned into Mrs Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
Well, we can all do this happybunny. I will try... wait...
Posted by Vaderr (Member # 12450) on :
testing... 1,2,3 Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
NOOOOOOOOOO
BICHEZ SHALL DIE TONIGHT!
Posted by Desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
Don't worry... We know there is only one Vader!
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
No honestly
Vader you posted this right?
ok, I found her posts now, she seems quite sane to me. Well its up to her what she does with her body, she must have sent the pics to someone not put them up for the world to see, so that makes the person who put them up the sleaze, she's not really done anything wrong has she. AND she's pregnant? and by this guy who is putting up the private pics?
----------------------------------
Now it says Mrs posted it, it really doesn't sound like Mrs
Are you playing Vader? Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
It could have been anyone, happybunny. Did you see I could do that trick too? Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
No, that wasn't me!!!! Holy sh*t, I'm gonna go back to drinking pepsi while you sort this out.
When I'm back there'd better not be any impostors left!
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
"Don't worry... We know there is only one Vader!"
I agree DG Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
DuHHHH
I got it now!
Thanks DG
Thought something was strange it was mentioned in the religion forum
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
, sorry guys I really didnt mean to confuse EVERYONE, I was just messing, trying to confuse vader, so I changed it, then got sidetracked and didnt come back to the pc for an hour. I forgot I changed it until someone told me on MSN, still quite funny that you are all confused, dont worry I'll fade back into insignificance now Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
It's ok... confusing Vader sounds good to me. lol
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
But you know what the really weird thing is, look at this message:
quote:Originally posted by Mrs: MysticHeart, do you kids a favour, tell your daughter you cant take her to Egypt because it wouldn't be much fun for you as you have now split up from Momen. Tell her that long distance relationships are not much fun and can end like this because people dont get to know each other very well. Tell her that it is natural, some relationships last, some dont, and that because of this relationship YOU HAVE LEARNT that it is much better to take it slow and get to know someone really well before you decide to get married. Then ask her where else she would like to go.
If you do all that she may have a hope of seeing reality instead of getting mixed up in all this 'fly accross the world' for a romance relationship. Tell her the relationship is over, and you are gonna pick yourself up and dust yourself off and get on with life because life is bigger than Momen. Maybe then she will do the same when her internet relationships fail.
Pacha, please answer this:
quote:Originally posted by Mrs:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: MH, YR, m.e., Ana Huna, Locale, Vicky, MissSharm,....etc
Pacha, two of these are English. Initially you said western women, not american women. And if you think American women are so bad, how come Mystic is the only one that you are addressing as a 'poor innocent victim' ?
there are women that NEVER talk about their sex life, Myself, Dalia, Smuckers, Ayisha, Newcomer, SWYS, I'm sure many more but cant list here.
I'm American and you can add me to your list of those who don't speak of their sex life online.
I'm American and I don't have a... ugh, I mean don't talk about my sex life online... Posted by BIC RUNGA ROXX (Member # 14666) on :
so ...there was another looooooooooong round.. any way..the best thing about this thread is that i found someone who is a Pespsi freak like me..a pepsi mate.. i Love Pepsi Max not regular though...but the worst thing is to know that someone is doing herself with a pepsi bottle..YUCK...why on earth bring that up in here..?? and why didn`t she use a COKE..?? wierd ppl..!!!
Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
quote:Originally posted by BIC RUNGA ROXX: so ...there was another looooooooooong round.. any way..the best thing about this thread is that i found someone who is a Pespsi freak like me..a pepsi mate.. i Love Pepsi Max not regular though...but the worst thing is to know that someone is doing herself with a pepsi bottle..YUCK...why on earth bring that up in here..?? and why didn`t she use a COKE..?? wierd ppl..!!!
Word.
Pepsi max!!! Traitor!! PEPSI MAX IS NOT...PEPSIIIIIIIIII....
lol
Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
Does anyone remember a lady called "Arlene Graham"did she come in here ??
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by BIC RUNGA ROXX: so ...there was another looooooooooong round.. any way..the best thing about this thread is that i found someone who is a Pespsi freak like me..a pepsi mate.. i Love Pepsi Max not regular though...but the worst thing is to know that someone is doing herself with a pepsi bottle..YUCK...why on earth bring that up in here..?? and why didn`t she use a COKE..?? wierd ppl..!!!
maybe she didnt wanna cut herself on the coke bottle pepsi is plastic lol
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
After all that Pepsi and Coke talk I think I'll have only tea today.
HAPPY EASTER!! Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: I am talking about ES members, i have never heard of those men on ES. That's what we read on ES: "American woman sleeping around" "American woman doing taxi drivers" "American woman denying her kids and family" "American woman leaving her kids to sleep around in Egypt" "American woman sleeping with more than one ES member" "American woman taking nude pictures of herself, with a water bottle in her !!!!!" lol
Dalia, what do you call those women? Angels!
How idiotic. First of all, the number of American tourists in egypt pales in comparison to the number of tourists who go there from Europe. Americans want a beach and sun, we go to Mexico or the Carribeans- so how many Americans you've actually met, I'd like to know. And I'd like to know how you can suggest that that small percentage of women compares to the entire female population of the united states.
Second of all, in case you didn't know, Americans tend to be much more religious, conservative, and observant than Europeans as a whole. This includes the number of people who attend church weekly, the number of people who believes in the bible, etc.
So for you to suggest in any way that American women are more promiscuous than any other group of women is absurb.
How about we say that the majority of Egyptian men are liars, thieves, shameless, and cheap. That they'll give anything up just to get a piece of paper to get them out of a country they hate. If giving up any type of shame, any honesty, lying to a women, sleeping with a woman for the sake of gaining something from her with the intention of leaving her - a man who does that is the biggest Whore out there. And thats what Egyptian guys do, right? Sure looks like it according to this website
And yeah, I sure know of European women who are promiscuous. Come to think of it. I know Arab women who are as well. But more so its the men. Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
Thats my take on it all, although YR is suspiciously quiet.
Yes im quiet due to the fact got no net in my home, and spent last days in the hospital. ok is that enough of an explanation.
i dont need to be suspisious. On pancha, im married, and not sleeping around with any egyptian, hes my first and last. so take me of your list.
Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
cant belive this thread actually grew so long.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
No, and I can't actually even believe people are replying that ridiclous new poster either. Comeon people, let this thread die now, it's so boring already. Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: No, and I can't actually even believe people are replying that ridiclous new poster either. Comeon people, let this thread die now, it's so boring already.
Ok, what should we talk about now. Anyone like horror movies? I just saw one- shutter- it was alright, ending was good, but I saw a trailor for another one, The Strangers, which loooks awwwwwwwwwwwwwwsome.
Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
Ok House of wax was a good Horror actually excerlent, saw so many these days as my husband loves them. I do hate the ones that are so unreal, with fake objects in them. The hitchiker is really good as well.
Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
quote:Originally posted by yorkshire rose: Ok House of wax was a good Horror actually excerlent, saw so many these days as my husband loves them. I do hate the ones that are so unreal, with fake objects in them. The hitchiker is really good as well.
ooh, i loved the hitch hiker movie with sean bean? whatever is his name is, i like him, and it was an entertaining movie.
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
I loved the SAW films 1 was the best though Also wolf creek that was OHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
HE WAS HOT LOOKING FOR SURE, BUT MY GOD, WHT AN EVIL FELLOW. Didnt see the saw movies, hubby did and he loves them.
Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
Ok, I liked Saw 1, not really the rest, and i HATE wolf creek - thats the first time i've walked out of a movie, I was so disgusted by pornographic violance, blah!
And yes, the hitcher was hot.
Seriously, this new movie looks crazy good, i dont want to wait for it. apparently its a remake of a french film called "Ils".
Omg i saw wolf creek too, jesus, that was true story, i felt sick after looking at that. I was hoping all would come out safe, but wasnt ment to be. Yes it was disgusting and that pervert is still on the loose. The same kind of movie as that is the hills have eyes. Wtong turn, they are all the same kind of things Please look at House of wax. really its the best one i saw.
Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
That clip looks good too. Is it called the stranger. I do like true ones. The Amytiville horror is a good one too. Did you ever see the haunting on the discovery channel?
Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
quote:Originally posted by yorkshire rose: That clip looks good too. Is it called the stranger. I do like true ones. The Amytiville horror is a good one too. Did you ever see the haunting on the discovery channel?
is that that show where they recreate events where people say that they had ghosts in their houses?
Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
Yes it is, its great, my hubby is so sad, as hes seen the lot, now and prays they will make more. I love it too, actually there better than movies. You have to see it for sure. Our treat is downloading a movie and snuggling up and i get my head rub all through the film.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I'm scared... Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
*puts the light on for smucky*
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
Happy Easter to everyone! Posted by MrsCoconut (Member # 14823) on :
I saw scream last night "orange blood " just had croquettes and fish cake .
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
Happy Easter all Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Happy Easter, thanks for the light Ayisha. Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
well happy easter to you too Ayisha, glad to see you here Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
i loved the mist
Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
topic successfully hijacked. Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
quote:Originally posted by hibbah: topic successfully hijacked.
Pepsi or coke ?
Posted by redseaschool1 (Member # 13387) on :
quote:Originally posted by hibbah:
quote:Originally posted by Pacha_Sanafir: I am talking about ES members, i have never heard of those men on ES. That's what we read on ES: "American woman sleeping around" "American woman doing taxi drivers" "American woman denying her kids and family" "American woman leaving her kids to sleep around in Egypt" "American woman sleeping with more than one ES member" "American woman taking nude pictures of herself, with a water bottle in her !!!!!" lol
Dalia, what do you call those women? Angels!
How idiotic. First of all, the number of American tourists in egypt pales in comparison to the number of tourists who go there from Europe. Americans want a beach and sun, we go to Mexico or the Carribeans- so how many Americans you've actually met, I'd like to know. And I'd like to know how you can suggest that that small percentage of women compares to the entire female population of the united states.
Second of all, in case you didn't know, Americans tend to be much more religious, conservative, and observant than Europeans as a whole. This includes the number of people who attend church weekly, the number of people who believes in the bible, etc.
So for you to suggest in any way that American women are more promiscuous than any other group of women is absurb.
How about we say that the majority of Egyptian men are liars, thieves, shameless, and cheap. That they'll give anything up just to get a piece of paper to get them out of a country they hate. If giving up any type of shame, any honesty, lying to a women, sleeping with a woman for the sake of gaining something from her with the intention of leaving her - a man who does that is the biggest Whore out there. And thats what Egyptian guys do, right? Sure looks like it according to this website
And yeah, I sure know of European women who are promiscuous. Come to think of it. I know Arab women who are as well. But more so its the men.
Well put, as others have stated its obvious some American women hurt him, and he has an axe to grind, not much different than the women who have been hurt by Egyptian men and generalize all of them.
There are hardly any American women living in Luxor or the Redsea, where most of this sex tourism occurs. The few in Cairo all stay in their closed off Maadi community and most of them are married to American men - ambassadors and oil execs, not Egyptian taxi drivers. And the few scattered around Alexandria, are teachers that run away after the contract exxpires. Most of the Americans that I personally know here, are Egyptian with American citizenships that moved back.
ETA: Must we must admit the sector of them that do sleep around when they go to the Carribean and Mexico(of course not with the locals) but with American boys who went down for spring break sex, we know of "Girl gone wild" videos. But frankly speaking, if you can afford to vacation in the Carribean, surely you're not "poor white-trash" as he put it. Only the upperclass enjoy such luxury holidays.
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
<ahem>
Excuse me, but whatever gave anyone the impression an American woman can only have steaming hot illicit sex outside of the US border?
A$$ is E-V-E-R-Y-W-H-E-R-E and it's F-R-E-E.
Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
True!
Guess as an American woman I should really feel flattered that we have such a reputation as being HOT behind closed doors and know how to really please a man. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Well don't mistake things, American men are just as HOT, generally an American man can please a woman is very concerned about her sexual satisifaction...it almost validates him as a man. There are a lot of things said about American men and women, but one fact is that when it comes to intimacies - we all take it very seriously especially if we're with someone we love.
NOW as for those photos...that's just tacky, disgusting and the person who took them needs to have better judgement, and the person who ACCEPTED them needs to get back to basics. That isn't what sex is about...and please tell her to get her left nipple fixed. Thank you. Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vader:
quote:Originally posted by hibbah: topic successfully hijacked.
Pepsi or coke ?
Pepsi regularly, but Coke when its especially hot outside, with a straw. Posted by Dalia* (Member # 10593) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vader: Pepsi or coke ?
I'll have a cold Sakkara, thank you very much.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I miss Pepsi. Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
O RLY ?! I haven't had pepsi for two hours, how do you think I feel ?
Posted by Alchemist Shines On (Member # 12318) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I miss Pepsi.
Smucky, where do you live?? They have Pepsi in Egypt. That's it, I'm making a trip to bring you with Pepsi and peanut M&M's.
Maybe some lip balm too if you are good. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
LOL No, we have it but the anesthesia I had when I gave birth messed up my taste with any carbonated soft drinks! I can now taste the carbonic acid. Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
ya walid showed me a pepsi bottle and it was in arabic it just looked funny cas we dont have arabic on our pepsi bottles
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
ANYWHO, Alchemist do you plan to come back to Egypt again soon? Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Well don't mistake things, American men are just as HOT, generally an American man can please a woman is very concerned about her sexual satisifaction...it almost validates him as a man. There are a lot of things said about American men and women, but one fact is that when it comes to intimacies - we all take it very seriously especially if we're with someone we love.
True about American men, and if your in love with him its amazing... High Five Smuckers... Posted by Sic Luceat Lux (Member # 12020) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Well don't mistake things, American men are just as HOT, generally an American man can please a woman is very concerned about her sexual satisifaction...it almost validates him as a man. There are a lot of things said about American men and women, but one fact is that when it comes to intimacies - we all take it very seriously especially if we're with someone we love.
Well bless my stars and garters!
A woman actually said something positive on E.S about American men!
~Alistair
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
LOL Why the shock!? IMO Everyone has strong points. As it relates to Egyptian vs. American men each has his/her own (general) assets. I think if you could put some of the talents of the American man (mentioned above) with the sultry romantic nature of the Egyptian man (well known by most here) that would be a perfect guy.
But on a serious note, I must admit I accept romance coming from my Egyptian husband easier than I would an American man. If an American man flirted and gave me the words the Egyptian men do I would roll my eyes and think he was the biggest loser...why is that!?? Posted by Yana (Member # 11508) on :
gosh i spent like 2 hours reading all the posts. and such an ending :cry:
yalla i need some action
of course am sorry for MH, but well, that's life... after marrying live with u husband not 10000000 kms away.
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
quote:Originally posted by Yana: yalla i need some action
I'm guessing this has a different meaning in Armenia...
Posted by Yana (Member # 11508) on :
quote:Originally posted by VanillaBullshit:
quote:Originally posted by Yana: yalla i need some action
I'm guessing this has a different meaning in Armenia...
Not at all dear it depends on the "context"
Posted by Lumos (Member # 14589) on :
Just thought I'd add my tuppence worth, to ensure MH makes it into the 'Longest Thread Hall of Fame on ES'
In Mystics own words, when warned about marrying Momen:
" Please just stop and let me make my own choice in life if i marry him and he dumps me that is my choice and none of this is any of yours places to be doing anything about.''
Yikes MH, what a thing to say at such a time. Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
I guess she (MH) told us, huh?!? Posted by PeaceAtLast (Member # 14252) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Well don't mistake things, American men are just as HOT, generally an American man can please a woman is very concerned about her sexual satisifaction...it almost validates him as a man. There are a lot of things said about American men and women, but one fact is that when it comes to intimacies - we all take it very seriously especially if we're with someone we love.
True about American men, and if your in love with him its amazing... High Five Smuckers...
ew no they are not...the are lazy, stupid and nag like women. i will never go american looool
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
^^^^ I never dated any that fit that bill. The ones I always dated were work-alcholics, very smart, did the opposite of nag and loved to go out, spend money and wine and dine. The only draw back was the inability to commit (in general), otherwise American men are great. You just have to move in the right circles. Posted by Lumos (Member # 14589) on :
I agree, Smuckers. There are some attractive, loving, caring men in all countries. I don't think western men are afraid to commit... perhaps both sexes simply have more options available.
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by PeaceAtLast:
quote:Originally posted by of_gold:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Well don't mistake things, American men are just as HOT, generally an American man can please a woman is very concerned about her sexual satisifaction...it almost validates him as a man. There are a lot of things said about American men and women, but one fact is that when it comes to intimacies - we all take it very seriously especially if we're with someone we love.
True about American men, and if your in love with him its amazing... High Five Smuckers...
ew no they are not...the are lazy, stupid and nag like women. i will never go american looool
the first thing u have said i do acturally agree on!!!
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
I'm the one afraid to commit. Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: I'm the one afraid to commit.
Is that true of_gold? if it is that is a shame, try not to be afraid of what MIGHT happen, because for each day that passes your missing out on something good.
LUMOS!!!! good to see you back, missed you huni Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
It's true Mrs.
I know you are right. It will just take the right man.
What is this the therapy thread or something?
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
lol, yes therapy thread, that has a nice ring to it. You are an intelligent woman of_gold, I like reading your posts, you have nothing to be afraid of regarding committment because I am sure that in the future whatever came your way you would handle it well Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
Just be committed, not committed of Gold
Or you could be committed to being non committed
Or you could be non committed to being committed
So which is it and I will tell you how much E-therapy you will need. Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
Rumi careful girl, posts like that will get you committed Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: Rumi careful girl, posts like that will get you committed
Well it's no secret to my ES compadres that Im crazie . Everyone knows I am committed to being non committed.
By the way- I still insist I am NOT an ES addict!!! Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: By the way- I still insist I am NOT an ES addict!!!
Me too rumi, I just find it hard to 'close' the window sometimes Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Yea sure, even though this very thread is almost to 18 pages and we're still on it....MH is nowhere to be found and the topic isn't even about her anymore. Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
Thank you Mrs.
Well, Rumi, I want to commit, just want to be sure of who I commit to. It is not so much that I have a committing issue, as it is a making myself vulnerable issue. To commit is to make oneself vulnerable. In other words I need to establish a tremendous amount of trust. For me to do that means that I seek quality rather than quantity.
Being committed is another issue all together. Did you see The Shawshank Redemption? Being committed is like that. Basically you get screwed and then you have to crawl through caca to get out. I already have that t-shirt. Posted by Lumos (Member # 14589) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Yea sure, even though this very thread is almost to 18 pages and we're still on it....MH is nowhere to be found and the topic isn't even about her anymore.
Good for Mystic, if she is taking time to reflect and restructure her life without Momen. They can both move on then. Hopefully, this thread will stay as it has lessons for those rushing into marriage despite warnings or fears about their partner.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Mystic is trying to deal with her life. I miss him yes, but I no longer want him, not with the lies and all that. I want someone honest completely. I went to mosque friday, i had not been since he left me, I sat in the parking, I couldnt go in, I just couldnt face them, and tell them he left me like trash to be thrown. I sat in the truck and looked at the building, watched them go in watched them come out, and cried the entire time. I am just too humiliated, divorced not once but twice, though i divorced the first time,but, women are supposed to save the marriages, and i couldnt.
Posted by Lumos (Member # 14589) on :
Mystic, I've lost track of the men you have been involved with since I joined ES. The massacre count is high and has ex husbands, including an 'Orfi' one, ex boyfriends and your current husband, Momen. When will you learn to respect yourself, without using men as props?
If Momen was a one-off experience, I would have more sympathy - but it's just one in a catalogue of disasters and dramas. You insisted to the world that yours was a perfect and endless marriage, despite many warnings about Momen. It saddens me to see a woman describe herself as discarded trash, as it puts way too much power into the hands of a man. Please start to take responsibility for your own actions and leave Momen behind.
There are people on this forum who have suffered the death of loved ones and major turmoil, yet they don't behave as you do. I feel desperately sorry for your children, as watching their mother fall apart so often must be heartbreaking for them. You seem to be a hard working woman, who has gone through a lot, so you must have reserves of strength to draw on. You are a woman, not a weed, so learn from this and hopefully you will be truly happy in your next relationship.
Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
Good uck hun. Keep your chin up huni bigs hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Mystic is trying to deal with her life. I miss him yes, but I no longer want him, not with the lies and all that. I want someone honest completely. I went to mosque friday, i had not been since he left me, I sat in the parking, I couldnt go in, I just couldnt face them, and tell them he left me like trash to be thrown. I sat in the truck and looked at the building, watched them go in watched them come out, and cried the entire time. I am just too humiliated, divorced not once but twice, though i divorced the first time,but, women are supposed to save the marriages, and i couldnt.
Look I am happy as you seem to feel better. Just get over him, your marriage wasn't meant to be in the first place. Don't feel ashamed, there was nothing to save. All the best and take better care next time around. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Why are you breaking down unable to enter a mosque? What has it to do with HIM? He never went to that mosque with you, you don't have memories of it, nobody ever knew him...what is it? The marriage is over, it probably only lasted a few REAL weeks where you were together face to face, the rest was online and full of lies. What there is still to cry about I have no clue. I agree with Lumos, time to get busy living life instead of trying to find a man to validate to yourself that you are loveable. You want proof of that? Go home and hug your children, they love you and MORE than that they need YOU TO LOVE THEM, not be off trying to find a stranger to love.
Some people cannot see the forest for the trees. Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:
Some people cannot see the forest for the trees.
thats a new one on me, I always thought it was 'cant see the 'wood' for the trees' - meaning 'wood' of each tree, not 'wood', small forest?...lol, anyway, back to Mystic.
Nice to see you back again Mystic, unlike Tigerlilly I dont think you are getting over him. I think you are still wrapped up in believing he was what you hoped he was, that the whole relationship was as real and committed as you made it. Unfortunately both people have to want something to be real for it to work. As I think Smuckers said, you did not live together yet, so the relationship was still at courting stage, by western standards. I know that you loved him and you brought him into all your thoughts about everything, almost bought him into your day to day life through imagination, but he was never there - that is the reality and I think it is reality that you need to face. I'm not usually one to say think of what others go through, but sometimes you DO have to, as Lumos and Smuckers said, think of what you HAVE, not what you never really had. You have to separate the imaginary life you wanted with the real one you had.
I do hope that you have friends around you that are giving you a reality check 'get up and brush yourself down, look at reality' because that is what you need, rather than 'there, there huni, everything will be alright when the bad man goes' .
You wont be over him so quickly (or at least the dream you created) but it would be more healthy for you to admit that: 1. You are desperate to make a realtionship with an Egyptian/middle Eastern man work, you will TRY to put up with anything. 2. A Marriage will not be fully real until you live together as man and wife. 3. Until you live together as man and wife, the dream of each other that you may have is very fragile and can easily be shattered. 4. It is not in your childrens best interest to take them to Egypt while you have not accepted the above, Egypt is not a childrens holiday no matter how much you try and convince yourself.
Good luck and find some pragmatic friends. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
can’t see the forest for the trees
An expression used of someone who is too involved in the details of a problem to look at the situation as a whole: “The congressman became so involved in the wording of his bill that he couldn’t see the forest for the trees; he did not realize that the bill could never pass.”
I agree with Mrs. The marriage never really was anything more than a piece of paper and a few visits where he probably didn't even really ACT like a husband.
MH you lived in a fantasy world where you expected to marry him and things would work out happily ever after. You never saw him on a day to day basis, paid bills together, fixed broken toilets or changed burned out lightbulbs (in our case argued over who was going to change them )...you never picked out linens together and planned for birthdays/anniversaries/valentines days celebrations with each other/friends/family, you never had the discussions of spending some of the savings for something one of you really really wants...you never did much more than plan for him to leave the country and have some nice visits in Egypt ON YOUR DOLLAR!
What gets me is how much all of that money spent to visit him, stay in Egypt, help him with Visa and probably any cash you gave him would have been made MORE useful to going to your children...saving for their education, etc.
Again, you cannot see the forest for the trees and you never will until you realize that you keep chasing a dream that isn't going to work out...not in any man. My guess is that you are chatting up with some new ones right now, I wouldn't be surprised.
And why?
Because you are so desperate to make it happen with ANY man (as Mrs. said) who is Egyptian (arab?) or because you really feel unloveable for whatever low-self esteem reason? Your dignity does not lie in a man, that's what you do not understand...and your life isn't over if you don't find one to make things work out with...that's the other thing.
Please wake up. Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Dears the person Momen is now is not the person he was then, i see it clearly and i am not sitting around wishing to be with him. I wasted time with others doing that, sitting and hoping they would come back and missing them terribly and i have always let that control me i will not do this again.. now with previous relations i did a good job of hiding just how hurt i was from my children. This time i did not, for that first week, especially the first 3 days, they saw every bit of the pain. They were not here when i got the news, i didnt want them here, i fell completely apart yes, but my mother who is no where near me decided they should be with me. I didnt want them to see me that way but their father brought them. Yeah, for a week, the pain completely controlled me, i did nothing but lay and cry. However, anger finally set in, the realization that you know, if he is this way, then i dont want him. I will not hang on to what was and who he used to be. He is not that person so fine, i dont want him this way. As for what i am doing now, I am talking with friends that i have met,none of which are egyptian other than the couple egyptian friends i already had in the first place. I have decisions to make regarding certain things, but I am not going to rush. My situation is certainly not easy and no I will not be getting married any time soon as I cant do that with reason. Any future person I am with is going to have to move slowly. As for the mosque, i couldnt face them because the last discussion i had with them was about Momen coming, about his interview and his arrival. I couldnt face them to tell them that it wasnt happening, that i am divorcing.
Yorkie, honey, if you get online you can send from the computer to my phone, just right click and do send sms and put my phone number.. hugs honey wish i were with you through this time. and dont worry over me, yeah i still have tears from time to time but its not about wanting to be with him, its humiliation of a failed marriage. More concerning is you, please let me know anything i can help with.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
Mrs it is 'Can't see the wood for the trees' for us Brits, them foreigners over the pond say it differently (The American expression is "Can't see the forest for the trees")
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Ours is better. Posted by Alchemist Shines On (Member # 12318) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Ours is better.
Agreed, ours makes more sense. Posted by Lumos (Member # 14589) on :
quote:Originally posted by Alchemist Shines On:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Ours is better.
Agreed, ours makes more sense.
NOT!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
How frightfully interesting although i think you will find that you Americans are a little confused:
UNABLE TO SEE THE WOODS FOR THE TREES - From "Heavens to Betsy" by Charles Earle Funk (Harper & Row, New York, 1955): "Too beset by petty things to appreciate the greatness or grandeur; too wrapped up in details to gain a view of the whole. In America we are likely to use the plural, 'woods,' or possibly to substitute 'forest,' but 'wood' is the old form and is preferable . Yes, the saying is at least five hundred years old, and probably a century or two could be added to that, for it must have been long been in use to have been recorded in 1546 in John Heywood's 'A dialogue Conteynyng the Nomber in Effect of all the Prouerbes in the Englishe Tongue.' He wrote 'Plentie is no deinte, ye see not your owne ease. I see, ye can not see the wood for trees.' And a few years later, in 1583, Brian Melbancke, in 'Philotimus: the Warre Betwixt Nature and Fortune,' wrote: 'Thou canst not or wilt not see wood for trees.' The saying has cropped up repeatedly from then to the present, becoming, in fact, more frequent with the passing years."
Aha! - 1 point to the Brits! Posted by Lumos (Member # 14589) on :
"Aha! - 1 point to the Brits!"
Ah... but a nation with so many 'Sun' readers can't be wrong. Can they, Ayisha? Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
Our expression (Dutch language) is the translation of the American one.
"Door het bos de bomen niet meer zien."
bos= forest bomen = trees
Now you are puzzled!! Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
No huni i speak dutch too. Nice to have a few different languages Lived in holland for 6 years. By the way, i rather have lived in belgium. Love the country side. Love how the roads totally change as you go over the border.(Bump Bump)
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
You can't see the wood for the trees, ok, but what if it is winter and there are no leaves on the trees, therefore it would be quite easy to see the wood, in fact, that would be all you COULD see. HOWEVER, to imply that you could not see the entire FOREST because the trees were in the way makes more sense in getting the point across.
Sorry but I must say, in some things Americans improved the meanings. I'm sure it did come from having the immigrants with their translations. OF course some things we screwed up ( ) but in this one it was made better. It only sounds better to the Brits because you're used to it that way, but if you think about it logically the forest for the trees makes more sense. Thank you all for coming, and good night. Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Pinetrees, palmtrees, all trees without leaves-loss. (Is that a word???) Of course it is an expression that has been brought in by immigrants. I never saw Sitting Bull complain about a tree he isn't able to see anymore... Maybe he DID, after the consumption of to much firewater, but we can't take this seriously... Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
LOL poor sitting bull.... Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
So does this mean MH will not be posting at ES much more? I actually hope she stays around, and her husband wasn't the only link.
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Ours is better.
Agree with Smuckers!!! Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by desertgirl: Our expression (Dutch language) is the translation of the American one.
"Door het bos de bomen niet meer zien."
bos= forest bomen = trees
Now you are puzzled!!
Wooo Hooo! Formal endorsement. The Dutch side with the Americans! Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I knew there was a reason we loved the Dutch! Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
lol yep apple cake Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Someone should post a recipe for Apple Cake in the food section, I would love to have one ! Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Someone should post a recipe for Apple Cake in the food section, I would love to have one !
wella it is done just for you and ohhhhhhhh so easy Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: So does this mean MH will not be posting at ES much more? I actually hope she stays around, and her husband wasn't the only link.
I might not post alot but I am staying around, I do have friends still in egypt and also on this forum, though most of my friends have stopped posting here. I am really hoping to be able to bring my daughter there over the summer, just waiting to see how finances play out. Got an email from the .. not sure what to call him really, stating that he would have the papers back in less than 10 days and would send them to me but that i would be officially notified in 2 months. Everything is email now since he either no longer has a phone as he claims, which i dont think i believe, or changed his phone number which is more likely. I hope everything is very well with all here, Lumos, i thought i noticed something that stated you were having a hard time? If so i hope that whatever it is passes quickly and you are ok.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: You can't see the wood for the trees, ok, but what if it is winter and there are no leaves on the trees, therefore it would be quite easy to see the wood, in fact, that would be all you COULD see. HOWEVER, to imply that you could not see the entire FOREST because the trees were in the way makes more sense in getting the point across.
Smucky what a very BUSH way of thinking you have If its a lot of trees its a forest ok, but even without its leaves a tree is a tree!! and the forest still stands, leafless Saying you cant see the Forest coz of the trees is silly as the forest is still there, its the BIG thing, whereas the 'wood' is a more hidden thing like: "too wrapped up in details to gain a view of the whole." you wouldnt go into a forest and say 'look at all these bits of wood' would you? you would say 'look at all these trees in this forest though.'[/quote]
quote:Sorry but I must say, in some things Americans improved the meanings. I'm sure it did come from having the immigrants with their translations. OF course some things we screwed up ( ) but in this one it was made better. It only sounds better to the Brits because you're used to it that way, but if you think about it logically the forest for the trees makes more sense. Thank you all for coming, and good night.
I dont think in anything Americans 'improved' the meanings, even with the strange spelling, probably made things more confusing....I mean if i say to you 'do you want a check' what would you take it as? I would be wanting to check YOU for something or let YOU check something, YOU would expect money
Yes there were many things you screwed up Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
BTW, sorry to say there are many things we did improve and I have made the points of them before, however; I am far too tired now to remember what they are.
"Bush way of thinking"??? You should be tarred and feathered for that remark. Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:
"Bush way of thinking"??? You should be tarred and feathered for that remark.
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
It's dictionary time!
A "woods" describes the size of a group of trees.
Grove (smaller than woods and forest), then woods (bigger than grove, smaller than forest), then forest (bigger than grove and woods).
I'm voting for forest.
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
'Wood for the trees' gets my vote!!
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote: Smucky what a very BUSH way of thinking you have If its a lot of trees its a forest ok, but even without its leaves a tree is a tree!! and the forest still stands, leafless Saying you cant see the Forest coz of the trees is silly as the forest is still there, its the BIG thing, whereas the 'wood' is a more hidden thing like: "too wrapped up in details to gain a view of the whole." you wouldnt go into a forest and say 'look at all these bits of wood' would you? you would say 'look at all these trees in this forest though.'
Ayisha, Thats the point...you can't see the big, huge thing because of the little things in the way. Kinda like "Strain at a gnat and swallow a camel".
***Score Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
of_gold dont be bringing camels and gnats into it! Its confusing enough already Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
lol Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
MH let me clear it up ..
You call him a DICK. You say, "I got an email from the DICK".
We will all know who you are referring to.
And can you imagine an Egyptian tour guide without a phone? HA, what a DICK
Posted by Yowza (Member # 14400) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: of_gold dont be bringing camels and gnats into it! Its confusing enough already
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: MH let me clear it up ..
You call him a DICK. You say, "I got an email from the DICK".
We will all know who you are referring to.
And can you imagine an Egyptian tour guide without a phone? HA, what a DICK
Telepathy? Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
It's "can't see the forest through the trees".
I don't think MH's "ex" was her link to ES. She was posting way before her marriage to him and actually met him here on this board.
Posted by civil society (Member # 14880) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: MH let me clear it up ..
You call him a DICK. You say, "I got an email from the DICK".
We will all know who you are referring to.
And can you imagine an Egyptian tour guide without a phone? HA, what a DICK
Telepathy?
lol!!
Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
"That i am not saying because of a bit of old fashioned superstition. No the bit is not something that is particularly good news, and is the reason he suddenly wants nothing to do with me any further, again running from his responsibilities is what he is best at."
Pregnant aren't you. MORE KIDS.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Yikes. Posted by MK the Most Interlectual (Member # 8356) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: Mrs it is 'Can't see the wood for the trees' for us Brits, them foreigners over the pond say it differently (The American expression is "Can't see the forest for the trees")
Here we say it Can't See the Site for the Trolls and Stupid Women.
Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
BWAH!
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
I can't believe this thread is still running!! Although it has taken a few differnet twists and turns along the way!! Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by advocate: I can't believe this thread is still running!! Although it has taken a few differnet twists and turns along the way!!
If it`s a Mystic thread,it can run as long as her list of lurrvessssssssss! That`s what i call MysticMagic!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
abra cadabra Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
....and it goes on ...and on....and on!!! Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
My threads reach from 1 post (mine ) to 2 pages maximum. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
Everybody stay tuned.Coming soon:The Signing of Divorce Papers chapter.Read somewhere Mystic said the papers have arrived already. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I wonder how much she gets upon divorce...how much she had put in the contract to receive after divorce? What is this called in Arabic, mouakhar?|
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I said i didnt want anything upon divorce, they put in the marriage contract 100 le.. of course i didnt even get that. The divorce papers are here and in hand, he went and did it April 6th. Its over and done, He at the beginning of this telling me it was over said he would send me money to pay for the visa process that he cost me and now states he didnt force me to do it so he isnt sending anything. Its ok, he just keeps showing more and more what kind of man he really is... not a man at all. I am moving on with my life and i really wish i could say i hope he finds happiness but i dont, not at all. As of next week i will officially start dating, yeah yeah i know ,, all think i should wait but honestly, i am not going to waste my life sitting around alone, life too short. Though i am sticking to someone in the states already, though not american nor egyptian for that matter but at least he wont be needing me for a visa of any sort.
Posted by Shahrazat (Member # 12769) on :
Ohh! mystic, don't let this topic be another 18 pages If anybody wants to say something, please start a new topic Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: As of next week i will officially start dating, yeah yeah i know ,, all think i should wait but honestly, i am not going to waste my life sitting around alone, life too short. Though i am sticking to someone in the states already, though not american nor egyptian for that matter but at least he wont be needing me for a visa of any sort.
Have you finished your Iddah (waiting period following divorce) already?
Actually from 10th March to now, you couldn't have had three legitimate periods. As you will probably know by now, a Muslim woman is still considered as Islamically married to her husband until she has had three periods following a declaration of divorce, which wasn't made while she was having a period, or if she is pregnant, until she delivers the child.
You may be in a hurry to be with a man again...but as a Muslimah, you should also make sure that what you are doing is halal. Please read up more on this subject before you just follow your feelings blindly.
Btw. you are not "alone", you have your children; how must they feel when they hear you say that you don't want to waste your time sitting around alone with them~!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I said i didnt want anything upon divorce, they put in the marriage contract 100 le.. of course i didnt even get that. The divorce papers are here and in hand, he went and did it April 6th. Its over and done, He at the beginning of this telling me it was over said he would send me money to pay for the visa process that he cost me and now states he didnt force me to do it so he isnt sending anything. Its ok, he just keeps showing more and more what kind of man he really is... not a man at all. I am moving on with my life and i really wish i could say i hope he finds happiness but i dont, not at all. As of next week i will officially start dating, yeah yeah i know ,, all think i should wait but honestly, i am not going to waste my life sitting around alone, life too short. Though i am sticking to someone in the states already, though not american nor egyptian for that matter but at least he wont be needing me for a visa of any sort.
Ouch, you should have asked for MUCH MUCH MORE...not that he would have paid it, but if it were a large enough amount it would have shown how serious he was in the beginning...maybe.
Oh MH, I beg you to not begin dating already. WHY? You just received the divorce papers, let the ink dry first!! There is no rush, you need to get things right in your heart and head first...nothing good can come from rebounding so quickly with another guy no matter where he lives/what his nationality is or what his visa status is. You have to think of your kids, how healthy is this?
You have to stop trying to validate yourself through men, someone else's approval of you doesn't matter!! Please think. Also keep in mind that as a Muslim women you're not supposed to be really dating. I hope he is Muslim after all, unless this is why you were asking the questions in the religion section about whether it was ok for a muslim women to date a non-muslim man. tisk tisk tisk....you certainly like to jump from the frying pan into the fire my dear. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
Yup,told you girls....MysticMagic is back with more!!!!
*checks up on the popcorn bucket cooking in the microwave ready to pass it around the captive audience of the thread*
Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: As of next week i will officially start dating, yeah yeah i know ,, all think i should wait but honestly, i am not going to waste my life sitting around alone, life too short.
Oh, please don't, Mystic. Listen to what Newcomer says at the VERY least. What are you? 34? I didn't meet my husband until I was 36 I think -- after being single for 2 YEARS. You aren't wasting life. You are just living it in a different way.
I would highly recommend a several-year break from dating. It's amazing what it does for your self-esteem, how you can actually find out who *you* are, and not just in relation to whatever man happens to be in your life for the moment.
Focus on Islam. Read up on philosophy or self-help books. Take an art class. Join some cardio classes at the Y. Take your kids hiking or biking or just for an ice cream cone. Pick a state in the U.S. you never thought about visiting and just go!
But don't take a man. Please value who you are, and not how a man makes you feel for a few minutes....until it turns ugly again. You are worth more than that.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Originally posted by mysticheart:
As of next week i will officially start dating, yeah yeah i know ,, all think i should wait but honestly, i am not going to waste my life sitting around alone, life too short.
Posted by Dawn-Bev* (Member # 15190) on :
alone! you're not alone! you have children. precious children! think about them and their feelings too, dont let them get low self-esteem because of that
you dont need a man to feel complete and live a full life, having a partner is a BONUS
Posted by Snidely Whiplash (Member # 15126) on :
Put your kids up for adoption now b4 they realize there momma is a skeeze. prolly too late Selfish woman. Worst momma i ever heard of.
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
well, i wouldn't nominate MH as being the worst mother in the world... Susan Smith definitely ranks higher in that department (remember, she's the mother that drowned her 2 kids and then blamed a black guy for it)
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I wonder how much she gets upon divorce...how much she had put in the contract to receive after divorce? What is this called in Arabic, mouakhar?|
Women that do not have an education, a career, and a good financial future on their own, should never accept to marry without a hefty mo'2akhar
It is The PROTECTION against 'sudden' volcanos a.k.a Sudden Divorce... to be able to pay bills and bring up children, in case the man turns out to be a traitor.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
But like in her case he didn't even pay the measley 100 LE... If he won't pay that he certainly wouldn't pay a hefty amount of anything more.
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: But like in her case he didn't even pay the measley 100 LE... If he won't pay that he certainly wouldn't pay a hefty amount of anything more.
True.
That is why it is a big mistake getting married without someone that cares for us, that would look after our interest like a brother, a father a cousin ...
IMO getting married with someone from a different culture, in his country, without our family...not a good thing. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Well IMO anyone that's only going to ask for 100 LE doesn't much care about it anyway.
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
quote:Originally posted by Snidely Whiplash: Put your kids up for adoption now b4 they realize there momma is a skeeze. prolly too late Selfish woman. Worst momma i ever heard of.
MysticSkeeze
AAHAUHAUHAUAHUAHUAUAHUAHAUHAUHAUHAUHUAHAUH
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Well IMO anyone that's only going to ask for 100 LE doesn't much care about it anyway.
True again! Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8: *checks up on the popcorn bucket cooking in the microwave ready to pass it around the captive audience of the thread*
Could someone please pass the bucket this way.
Bucket of popcorn, I mean.
Yeah. Popcorn.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8: *checks up on the popcorn bucket cooking in the microwave ready to pass it around the captive audience of the thread*
Could someone please pass the bucket this way.
Bucket of popcorn, I mean.
Yeah. Popcorn.
*passes popcorn bucket to justvisiting*
Anyone care for something to drink?
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
it's kind of funny that the top of this pages starts with apple cake and ends with popcorn
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
ohhhhhh you know what sounds good? A caramel apple!
Ok, really back to MH...dating again (sigh).
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: ohhhhhh you know what sounds good? A caramel apple!
Ok, really back to MH...dating again (sigh).
No, more like back to the latest episode of "MH: Muslim when it's convenient." Normally I'm not one to take a jab at someone because of the way they practice their faith however sometimes people should be smacked upside the head with their Book.
It's one thing to talk the talk. Walking the walk is entirely different.
Less talking, MH. More walking.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: ohhhhhh you know what sounds good? A caramel apple!
Ok, really back to MH...dating again (sigh).
No, more like back to the latest episode of "MH: Muslim when it's convenient." Normally I'm not one to take a jab at someone because of the way they practice their faith however sometimes people should be smacked upside the head with their Book.
It's one thing to talk the talk. Walking the walk is entirely different.
Less talking, MH. More walking.
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:[/QB]
Oh, I'm not at all.
In fact, I'm rather looking forward to the sordid details of MH's new man who, because MH is Muslim is most certainly Muslim as well, either does not know or does not care that she is still, according to her religion, married, however he's not interested in a visa/GC so one can only speculate what THIS relationship is going to be about.
I can't wait to hear aaaaaaall about how this one used and abused her.
WUT-EV.
Posted by MK the Most Interlectual (Member # 8356) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: As of next week i will officially start dating
You thrive on getting spit at, don't you?!
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I am not violating any rules. I spoke with Imam and was informed that I can speak with men during the waiting period and also i can be spoken for for future marriage in this period, the limitation is that i cannot marry until after the 3 months is over. I have not been in my ex husband bed since mid feb. The Imam told me everything i need to know. I am free to date so to speak, but what i am doing is more like interviewing hahahahaha. My children are not involved, not until i know for certain there will be a marriage.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
and further, this dating i am doing is for intentions to find a suitable partner for financial purpose not love. As long as i can stand to look at the man and be around him,will treat the children well, he is good muslim, and can provide financially fine.
Posted by Miss Sharm (Member # 12405) on :
Mysticheart - Please, please read this thread from beginning to end and listen to the advice that some are trying to give to you.
You are not even out of this marriage properly yet and you are already talking about marrying someone again.
Take some time out from relationships altogether. You are still hurting from this last mariage/relationship and surely if you begin another one without recovering fully it will only lead to disaster. You need to have time in your life without men being the main purpose and then maybe you will realise that there is more to life than men/marriage/realtionships.
Learn to love and respect yourself and then others will do the same back to you.
Amanda x
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I am not violating any rules. I spoke with Imam and was informed that I can speak with men during the waiting period and also i can be spoken for for future marriage in this period, the limitation is that i cannot marry until after the 3 months is over. I have not been in my ex husband bed since mid feb. The Imam told me everything i need to know. I am free to date so to speak, but what i am doing is more like interviewing hahahahaha. My children are not involved, not until i know for certain there will be a marriage.
.....but there was a marriage with Momen.What are you talking about,then? Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: and further, this dating i am doing is for intentions to find a suitable partner for financial purpose not love. As long as i can stand to look at the man and be around him,will treat the children well, he is good muslim, and can provide financially fine.
Now *there's* a worthy goal. Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Yes there was a marriage with momen, that marriage legally ended April 6th. I have not been with momen since Feb 13th, and he told me he was not coming and things were over march 7th. It is nearing 2 months since his anouncement, 3 months since i have been with him and the Imam has said that i can "date" so to speak during the waiting period however can not marry, any man that i agree to can state his intentions to marry me in that time. However, i am not speaking of marrying at the moment, only interviewing so to speak prospective people for consideration of the future to enter into an agreement of marriage for financial stability and mutual benefit.
Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
I really hope this is all a joke.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
It isn't, she's deluding herself again. 'so to speak' this and 'so to speak' that...look honey, you're jumping back into the fire, call it whatever you want. Marrying for financial purposes? You haven't lost enough money already? Or are you planning to try to make up some of the money you've lost with the others through this new one?
Comeon, seriously, do you like put your children DEAD LAST ahead of your own wants and needs all of the time? This is just so sad.
Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: and further, this dating i am doing is for intentions to find a suitable partner for financial purpose not love. As long as i can stand to look at the man and be around him,will treat the children well, he is good muslim, and can provide financially fine.
Mystic you have gone all Egyptian woman on us
How much gold will you ask for and whats your favourite soap on the TV?
Hmmmmmmm that about covers it........
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Just looking to the future. One particular guy in mind, he mentioned the offer to me, not the other way. He is willing to move here to me, is already in states, doesnt need me for any sort of visa or immigration issue. He is looking for a wife to give him children and take care of his needs, must be a covering muslimah that sees to her prayers and fasting... Well i can provide for all of that... He has work offers that he can accept here that will provide decently for the family, has offered to buy a new home for us though i already own my own, I may work if i wish though it is not required, he will provide everything we need, including anything my children need, anything that i make from my work if i choose to remain working is mine to keep for whatever i choose. All in all i think not a bad offer. Still thinking on it, and have a couple others i need to speak to before making my final decision on which person would be best. The ones i am considering all offer about the same thing, just each is in various states of immigration status and from different countries, gotta decide as well which culture is best suited for me to live with.
Posted by MK the Most Interlectual (Member # 8356) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: the Imam has said that i can "date" so to speak during the waiting period
This Imam of yours ya Tonya- is his first name Adel?
Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
she's been hacked!!
Auto???? Posted by MK the Most Interlectual (Member # 8356) on :
^^ Shut it ya Allison ya Sokary.
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Oh my god what is happening here????? I know i have been away for 3 weeks but looking at these posts it must have been 3 years - or has mystic managed to condense years into weeks? Slow down girl... You are travelling at 100 miles an hour, take a deep breath and enjoy your children before they have grown and flown the nest...
Posted by Miss Sharm (Member # 12405) on :
Mysticheart - Ask yourself what you want out of a relationship? You seem so confused, one minute you want true love and now you are out to see what you can get financially.
I know that life is too short and that we all deserve to be happy but there are other ways than a relationship that can lead to happiness.
You are not even out of one relationship and jumping into another one.
Did you ever love Momen? From what I am reading here I can only conclude that you didn't because from what I understood if it was true love you would not even be thinking about another relationship so soon yet alone planning the next marriage.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Just looking to the future. One particular guy in mind, he mentioned the offer to me, not the other way. He is willing to move here to me, is already in states, doesnt need me for any sort of visa or immigration issue. He is looking for a wife to give him children and take care of his needs, must be a covering muslimah that sees to her prayers and fasting... Well i can provide for all of that... He has work offers that he can accept here that will provide decently for the family, has offered to buy a new home for us though i already own my own, I may work if i wish though it is not required, he will provide everything we need, including anything my children need, anything that i make from my work if i choose to remain working is mine to keep for whatever i choose. All in all i think not a bad offer. Still thinking on it, and have a couple others i need to speak to before making my final decision on which person would be best. The ones i am considering all offer about the same thing, just each is in various states of immigration status and from different countries, gotta decide as well which culture is best suited for me to live with.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
You sure you're not on LSD,Mystic? Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
This is totally unbelievable! Oh, my gosh! For anyone to publically admit their willingness to become a "legalized protistute" is beyond words.
I am convinced you need psychiatric help, MH, even more than I thought before. Your poor kids. . .I feel so sorry for them.
I'll take a maguerita. . .got any buttered popcorn left in that bucket????
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bonzo: This is totally unbelievable! Oh, my gosh! For anyone to publically admit their willingness to become a "legalized protistute" is beyond words.
I am convinced you need psychiatric help, MH, even more than I thought before. Your poor kids. . .I feel so sorry for them.
I'll take a maguerita. . .got any buttered popcorn left in that bucket????
*passes popcorn bucket to Bonzo*
Posted by Yowza (Member # 14400) on :
*passes on the popcorn and marguerita, and gets chocolate*
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I loved him, that is the problem. I love and in return i am crushed. So my conclusion, better not to love and just make an arrangement instead. I dont get hurt that way.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I have always gone for love, its always been the basis of my relations. Yes i still love momen, however, he has proven not to deserve it. No i wont instantly stop loving him but i do know i love how he was, not who he is now. What he and i had isnt coming back, and im sick of being hurt and **** on. Therefore i have come to the decision that from here on, my life will be basically what alot of muslims do, marry for status and suitability. Find the one that can provide financially, that will be kind and fair, keep to his duties as a muslim husband and me provide to him as i should. Love doesnt need to be included in this, and maybe in time love will follow. Arranged marriage.
Posted by happybunny (Member # 14224) on :
why so soon?
I have never met anyone who has just got divorced (like a week) and who broke up a couple of months ago talk about finding someone else to marry - business like or not. Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I have always gone for love,
Try loving yourself first.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I have always gone for love, its always been the basis of my relations. Yes i still love momen, however, he has proven not to deserve it. No i wont instantly stop loving him but i do know i love how he was, not who he is now. What he and i had isnt coming back, and im sick of being hurt and **** on. Therefore i have come to the decision that from here on, my life will be basically what alot of muslims do, marry for status and suitability. Find the one that can provide financially, that will be kind and fair, keep to his duties as a muslim husband and me provide to him as i should. Love doesnt need to be included in this, and maybe in time love will follow. Arranged marriage.
and when the dust settles and your head starts to become reasonably straight, you will find yourself in a loveless marriage with a man you have to have sexual relations with, relations you can only do and enjoy if you love the man, how do you think that will affect you and your kids? No you wont be able to keep up the pretence and you will become physically ill at bedtime. Once your mental and emotional state reaches a point that it WILL affect you physically you will not be able to care for your children or yourself, or the man who will be making demands on you. One can 'act' in a relationship for a time, but not forever.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
1. What kind of man should marry you, knowing that you love somebody else? 2. What kind of man should marry you, knowing you've only made this choice because of the money? 3. What kind of man should accept such a marriage, knowing about your past? 4. What kind of example are you giving to your children? 5. What kind of future do you have in mind for your children? 6. Do you care about your children?
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
So, dear Mystic...
This post of yours below from 15 April IS really about you after all???
Member Member # 6838
Rate Member posted 15 April, 2008 04:34 AM -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I talk to alot of people online, mostly women, and one of my online friends decided to marry for convenience. Basically she is struggling financially on her own, pregnant with twins, ordered to stop working until after the birth of her babies which is late this year(father doesnt acknowledge their exsistance).. so faced with this she has decided to take an offer of marriage that involves the guy paying all her expenses during the pregnancy if she will marry him after the babies are born and give him what he wants sexually when ever he requests , and basically be a servant to him, cooking, cleaning, whatever. In return he provides financially. Does this seem wrong to anyone else? I know its kinda a necessity for her but it just seems like a form of prostitution only with a paper to say it legal. -------------------
Well, middle of Feb (last with Momen) until middle of May are 3 months and due to superstition you can't tell before the end of the first 3 months, you said... So we only got hints... And these twins will come at the end of the year, works out with the above time scale, eh.. So, another 2 weeks and we will then hear that it IS you who is pregnant???
Hence the great new need now for financial security and someone helping to look after you and children (soon to be 5)?? Fair enough, THAT need is understood, and generally speaking, under the circumstances, that's a reasonable quest - but honestly now, woman, before you rush into this, what sort of man - Muslim or otherwise - would marry you just like that without knowing or loving you, with FIVE children from other men, even while you are still pregnant and only divorced 5 minutes, especially after you have only chatted on the Net, and presumably not met in person yet?? WHYYYYYY would anyone do that??????????? (Seeing all the 'serious offers' come from guys okay with immigration..).
And WHYYYY would you believe all and everything that such a man - all total strangers and foreigners from different cultures, too!! - now tells and promises you, HOW DO YOU KNOW he is okay, good, honest, not crazy, no psychopath, no ulterior motives???? And he will REALLY provide, will really get a good job, will really buy a house???? Have you seen the educational (job) certificates, the immigration papers, a biiiig suitcase full of cash???? Without THAT I would not believe a thing, anyone can waffle all day long... (example Momen).
Oh, and don't you also need an international divorce?? Meaning even though Momen divorced you in Egypt and sent the paper, don't you still need to have this legalised in an American court?? Doesn't that take a while??? What I am getting at is, though you are divorced IN EGYPT, aren't you still married in the US??
I shall refrain from any further comment, am just really curious to hear the answers to those questions to see how you think on the future... Thanks!!
Regards and be healthy, Bubble
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Yowza: *passes on the popcorn and marguerita, and gets chocolate*
((smuckers considers starting to drink...))
Good lord, MH is preganant with twins??! I should write a book about this...MH can I have the rights to your story please? Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
I must've missed the bit where MH said she was pregnant with twins, I thought it was her friend? Posted by Dawn-Bev* (Member # 15190) on :
I really cant believe this
I think I prefer the made up stories and the trolls, cos this is so unbelievably crazy and sad
just plain weird
did you ever seek professional help?????
going headlong straight into another relationship always backfires - jeez, did you get over Momen that quick?
and going into a relationship for financial reasons??
sometimes that works for some people, but only if that have thought it out with a CLEAR head for some time
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dawn-Bev*: I really cant believe this
Me neither ... I do think it is a good script for a pulp novel. Posted by Culture Club (Member # 13767) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: ... Therefore i have come to the decision that from here on, my life will be basically what alot of muslims do, marry for status and suitability. Find the one that can provide financially, that will be kind and fair, keep to his duties as a muslim husband and me provide to him as i should. Love doesnt need to be included in this, and maybe in time love will follow. Arranged marriage.
Amin ya MH, you are really deserve to get better man you want. Just pray to Allah, believe and you will see that will happen before your eyes!
I always pray for your happiness with your new future King who will love you and your kids as the way you are. Once time you get that good King, please love him as much as you can, please care him as much as you can, please serve him as much as you can. And I pray you will be his "Malak"... his angel forever in this life and after this life. Amin ya Rab.
Posted by Culture Club (Member # 13767) on :
Oh yes, I will say to you .. forget about a man called Momen. Why should you still love him? why should? why should? do not ever think about him even once, he doesnt deserve a place in your heart!. (angry!)
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Culture Club:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: ... Therefore i have come to the decision that from here on, my life will be basically what alot of muslims do, marry for status and suitability. Find the one that can provide financially, that will be kind and fair, keep to his duties as a muslim husband and me provide to him as i should. Love doesnt need to be included in this, and maybe in time love will follow. Arranged marriage.
Amin ya MH, you are really deserve to get better man you want. Just pray to Allah, believe and you will see that will happen before your eyes!
I always pray for your happiness with your new future King who will love you and your kids as the way you are. Once time you get that good King, please love him as much as you can, please care him as much as you can, please serve him as much as you can. And I pray you will be his "Malak"... his angel forever in this life and after this life. Amin ya Rab.
God helps those who help themselves. It's one thing to ask God for help and another to ignore his warning signs and desires for you to use the brain that was given to you. I would suggest MH cut off completely from men, immerse herself in family and home, take some night courses at any local college and find out who she is without any man. Until she finds herself she will never know true happiness, at least not the way she is trying. She's still waiting for the Knight to ride up on the white horse...and it's time to wake up to reality.
Posted by citizen (Member # 1344) on :
Put us out of our misery, Mystic, is it you or your friend that's expecting twins???
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I have always gone for love, its always been the basis of my relations. i have come to the decision that from here on, my life will be basically what alot of muslims do, marry for status and suitability.
Find the one that can provide financially, that will be kind and fair, keep to his duties as a muslim husband and me provide to him as i should. Love doesnt need to be included in this, and maybe in time love will follow.
Arranged marriage.
There is no right way to do a wrong thing.
Posted by unsure (Member # 12244) on :
Well I will most likely get slammed for this but I must defend Momen a little. Yes we all could see the type of person Momen was and MH CHOSE to be with him, but as this thread goes on it's evident MH is not right. She may have showed signs of mental problems and momen wanted out.
Posted by airspeed (Member # 14660) on :
quote:Originally posted by unsure: She may have showed signs of mental problems and momen wanted out.
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I am not violating any rules. I spoke with Imam and was informed that I can speak with men during the waiting period and also i can be spoken for for future marriage in this period, the limitation is that i cannot marry until after the 3 months is over. I have not been in my ex husband bed since mid feb. The Imam told me everything i need to know. I am free to date so to speak, but what i am doing is more like interviewing hahahahaha. My children are not involved, not until i know for certain there will be a marriage.
I would suggest that you check with another Iman, who is properly qualified to give you a fatwa on this, as from what you have said, this one has overlooked some important aspects of your situation. And I am saying this knowing very well the qualifications of many of the "imams" in the States.
An Islamic divorce starts from the declaration of divorce, it has absolutely nothing to do with when the last time you slept with your husband; it is based purely on the date of the declaration of divorce.
Divorced women remain in waiting for three periods, and it is not lawful for them to conceal what Allah has created in their wombs if they believe in Allah and the Last Day. And their husbands have more right to take them back in this [period] if they want reconciliation... And when you divorce women and they have fulfilled their term, either retain them according to acceptable terms or release them according to acceptable terms, and do not keep them, intending harm, to transgress [against them]. And whoever does that has certainly wronged himself. And do not take the verses of Allah in jest... There is no blame upon you for that to which you [indirectly] allude concerning a proposal to women or for what you conceal within yourselves. Allah knows that you will have them in mind. But do not promise them secretly except for saying a proper saying. And do not determine to undertake a marriage contract until the decreed period reaches its end. And know that Allah knows what is within yourselves, so beware of Him. And know that Allah is Forgiving and Forbearing. (Surah Al-Baqarah, 228-235)
If a woman is observing Iddah following a revocable divorce (i.e. a first or a second divorce), it is not permissible to give even an implicit proposal or hint at proposing, because a woman who has been given a revocable divorce is still a wife...she is still Islamically married! So how can a man even talk about marriage to a woman who is still lawfully married when her husband has lawful rights over her...no matter what the husband has said or done, he is still lawfully her husband.
Clearly stating a marriage proposal, as you say that this man and others have done is not permitted, according to the Qur’an, no matter what that Imam said. It is not permissible for anyone other than your husband, i.e. Momen, to offer an explicit proposal to take you back in marriage during this time.
If you had been irrevocably divorced, i.e. after a third declaration of divorce, someone could make an implicit proposal, such as saying, “I want to get married” or “I would like you to consult me when your ‘iddah ends”. “Implicit” does not mean dating with a view to marriage, interviewing with a view to marriage, deciding which man will give you the best deal, or discussing the details of how and when you will get married after the Iddah!!
It looks like you are clinging onto the opinion of an Imam that has given you an opinion that suits what you want to do, rather than what is correct! As I said before, read around the sound sources and learn more about what you as a Muslim woman should be doing, before you get into this any deeper than you already have; for the sake of your religion, your sanity, and your kids!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Any Imam that says you can date should be suspect anyway.
So Newcomer, the Iddah doesn't begin until the declaration of divorce has been stated? And nobody can make a marriage of offer until the Iddah ends (3 months later)?
What if the woman is pregnant? Can an offer of marriage still be made?
Also MH, even if you THINK you are out of your Iddah you cannot be trolloping around with some guy...at least not by yourself. Definitely can't be alone with him - I hope you remember that. Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Any Imam that says you can date should be suspect anyway.
So Newcomer, the Iddah doesn't begin until the declaration of divorce has been stated? And nobody can make a marriage of offer until the Iddah ends (3 months later)?
What if the woman is pregnant? Can an offer of marriage still be made?
Also MH, even if you THINK you are out of your Iddah you cannot be trolloping around with some guy...at least not by yourself. Definitely can't be alone with him - I hope you remember that.
Even if a couple have been living apart for years, the divorce, and therefore the Iddah (which is the waiting period following divorce or death), doesn't begin until the actual divorce has been declared, or the death occured.
Btw. if the divorce is declared while the woman is having a period, it doesn't count...if it is declared at that time, it has to be said again after she has finished her period, and the timing for the Iddah starts from that declaration.
No one can make an offer for marriage or even discuss another marriage until the Iddah has finished, because the woman still comes under the rulings as a wife until the end of that time. A hint can only be given to a woman who has been irrevocably divorced, i.e. after a third divorce, but an offer cannot be made until the end of the Iddah.
The Iddah ends for a divorced woman by the third period following the declaration of divorce. There are different interpretations as to what the Arabic words used for this means...some interpret them as meaning that it can be at the beginning of the third period following the declaration, others interpret it as meaning when she has finished her third period.
If the woman is pregnant, the Iddah ends whenever she deliveres her child/children; whether or not this is before or after the usual approximately three month Iddah.
The Iddah for a widow, btw. is four months and ten days.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by unsure: Well I will most likely get slammed for this but I must defend Momen a little. Yes we all could see the type of person Momen was and MH CHOSE to be with him, but as this thread goes on it's evident MH is not right. She may have showed signs of mental problems and momen wanted out.
Now i can say i truly see this.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<trolloping around with some guy>
ROFL Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by newcomer:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Any Imam that says you can date should be suspect anyway.
So Newcomer, the Iddah doesn't begin until the declaration of divorce has been stated? And nobody can make a marriage of offer until the Iddah ends (3 months later)?
What if the woman is pregnant? Can an offer of marriage still be made?
Also MH, even if you THINK you are out of your Iddah you cannot be trolloping around with some guy...at least not by yourself. Definitely can't be alone with him - I hope you remember that.
The Iddah for a widow, btw. is four months and ten days.
That's interesting, why do you think it is longer for a widow? Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: That's interesting, why do you think it is longer for a widow?
Not sure exactly. My guess is that widowhood would traditionally be more of an emotional sadness in most cases than divorce and that a widow would need longer to grieve than a divorcee from a bad marriage.
And those who are taken in death among you and leave wives behind – they, [the wives, shall] wait four months and ten [days]. And when they have fulfilled their term, then there is no blame upon you for what they do with themselves in an acceptable manner. And Allāh is [fully] Acquainted with what you do.
Um Habiba narrated that the Prophet said, "It is not lawful for a Muslim woman who believes in Allah and the Last Day to mourn for more than three days, except for her husband, for whom she should mourn for four months and ten days."
Um 'Atiyya narrated: "We were forbidden to mourn for more than three days for a dead person, except for a husband, for whom a wife should mourn for four months and ten days (while in the mourning period) we were not allowed to put kohl in our eyes, nor perfume ourselves, nor wear dyed clothes, except a garment of 'Asb (special clothes made in Yemen). But it was permissible for us that when one of us became clean from her menses and took a bath, she could use a piece of a certain kind of incense. And it was forbidden for us to follow funeral processions."
(Both taken from Al-Bukhari)
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8: <trolloping around with some guy>
ROFL
Perhaps that was the wrong word, I might have said 'galloping'. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8: <trolloping around with some guy>
ROFL
Perhaps that was the wrong word, I might have said 'galloping'.
Noo,nooo,i like this one.It's spot on describes the situation perfectly. Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
Things to think about when remarrying:
1) If you are in a completely messed up situation, do you really want a man who's attracted to a woman in a messed up situation? 2) Just because he's Muslim doesn't mean he's a good guy. 3) There are men who prey on emotionally-troubled single moms just to get to the kids and molest them. 4) Just because he's in the states doesn't mean he doesn't need immigration help that marriage to an American would provide.
Truly, just stay single until your kids are grown and/or out of the house. Please.
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I have always gone for love, its always been the basis of my relations. Yes i still love momen, however, he has proven not to deserve it. No i wont instantly stop loving him but i do know i love how he was, not who he is now. What he and i had isnt coming back, and im sick of being hurt and **** on. Therefore i have come to the decision that from here on, my life will be basically what alot of muslims do, marry for status and suitability. Find the one that can provide financially, that will be kind and fair, keep to his duties as a muslim husband and me provide to him as i should. Love doesnt need to be included in this, and maybe in time love will follow. Arranged marriage.
Why do you have to marry so quickly?
Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
quote:Originally posted by harankash: she's been hacked!!
Auto????
So do tell Mystic how much gold are you worth?
Posted by Bubblesperson (Member # 12454) on :
Thanks, dear Newcomer, for those interesting explanations!!
So, in other words, if it IS our Mystic who is expecting twins (and not her friend, once again I am reading between the lines... BUT the time scale makes sense, her 'I can't say the whole news until after 3 months' superstition fits here, and 'the father does not acknowledge expected twins' fits with 'Once again Momen is running from his responsibilities', ca..), then Mystic's Iddah does not end until after the birth at the end of the year???
And so she couldn't possibly get married now??? Now a Muslim man - those candidates - would know that, ca??? Makes it even more weird that he should propose... For why, for what...
Dear Mystic, if it IS you who is indeed pregnant, I'm not quite sure what to say, happy news or not... In a way both... But, what I AM sure about is that for your other kids a new sibling (or two) is quite enough change already, forget the new man for now...
Or are you really that worried about coping financially??? Is there no other way??
Oooh, do come on now please, do put us out of our misery and TELL!!!! the 3 months is nearly up...
All the best, Buubble
Posted by Shahrazat (Member # 12769) on :
Hey MH, why do you do this to yourself?
Why do you tell all the things you live and than making people commenting about yourself, your kids, your moral values and your psychology?
It must be much more harder to read these things than the thing that your husband made you live.
I m sure there are some people here who did lots of mistakes in their lives. But they are clever enough to not share these things with others.
Please don't make this to yourself and your family..
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Yes We Can: Things to think about when remarrying:
1) If you are in a completely messed up situation, do you really want a man who's attracted to a woman in a messed up situation?
That is perfectly said. Do you honestly think she will listen for the (what is this?) 3rd or 4th time? Nope, MH will come on and say she's a big girl again and knows what she's doing THIS TIME and is smarter now and taking it a different way (even though if you blinked you would have missed the last breakup).
Please tell us when you marry the new one, when it ends and how he did you wrong, ummkay? Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:
quote:Originally posted by Yes We Can: Things to think about when remarrying:
1) If you are in a completely messed up situation, do you really want a man who's attracted to a woman in a messed up situation?
That is perfectly said. Do you honestly think she will listen for the (what is this?) 3rd or 4th time? Nope, MH will come on and say she's a big girl again and knows what she's doing THIS TIME and is smarter now and taking it a different way (even though if you blinked you would have missed the last breakup).
Please tell us when you marry the new one, when it ends and how he did you wrong, ummkay?
.....and that She knows She's nice and deserves Better Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Ohhh yea I forgot the 'nice' thing...that's my favorite. I wish I had a FLIPPENDO wand...where are Alchemist or Lumos when I need them.... Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bubblesperson: And so she couldn't possibly get married now??? Now a Muslim man - those candidates - would know that, ca??? Makes it even more weird that he should propose... For why, for what...
Hi Bubblesperson!
Any man who would propose to a Muslim woman, knowing that she is still in her Iddah, either has as little knowledge as mystic does about Islam or is one who bends the rules to suit himself. Not an ideal potential candidate in either situation!
Many men prey on new Muslimahs, because they are more vulnerable than those who either have experience in the Muslim world and know what to look out for and know their rights, or those who have Muslim families who can support them when/if things go wrong. They rely on their naivete, their keenness to be seen as good Muslimahs and so they are not as questioning and don't protect themselves in the same way born Muslimahs do...as witnessed by mystics last marriage...and their isolation.
Leaving aside the Iddah question, a man proposing to a new American Muslimah who is already divorced and has a bunch of kids, when there are hundreds of single Muslim women in the States who want to get married, is either an absolute angel and paragon of virtue or has an underlying agenda and needs to have his background checked out very thoroughly!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Yes, there are many Muslimahs in the states (single and no kids!) who are looking for husbands. While I think it is noble to take one saddled down with kids and a freshly signed divorce decree, I can't imagine why they wouldn't want the single/no kids convert. Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bubblesperson: So, dear Mystic...
This post of yours below from 15 April IS really about you after all???
Member Member # 6838
Rate Member posted 15 April, 2008 04:34 AM -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I talk to alot of people online, mostly women, and one of my online friends decided to marry for convenience. Basically she is struggling financially on her own, pregnant with twins, ordered to stop working until after the birth of her babies which is late this year(father doesnt acknowledge their exsistance).. so faced with this she has decided to take an offer of marriage that involves the guy paying all her expenses during the pregnancy if she will marry him after the babies are born and give him what he wants sexually when ever he requests , and basically be a servant to him, cooking, cleaning, whatever. In return he provides financially. Does this seem wrong to anyone else? I know its kinda a necessity for her but it just seems like a form of prostitution only with a paper to say it legal. -------------------
Well, middle of Feb (last with Momen) until middle of May are 3 months and due to superstition you can't tell before the end of the first 3 months, you said... So we only got hints... And these twins will come at the end of the year, works out with the above time scale, eh.. So, another 2 weeks and we will then hear that it IS you who is pregnant???
Hence the great new need now for financial security and someone helping to look after you and children (soon to be 5)?? Fair enough, THAT need is understood, and generally speaking, under the circumstances, that's a reasonable quest - but honestly now, woman, before you rush into this, what sort of man - Muslim or otherwise - would marry you just like that without knowing or loving you, with FIVE children from other men, even while you are still pregnant and only divorced 5 minutes, especially after you have only chatted on the Net, and presumably not met in person yet?? WHYYYYYY would anyone do that??????????? (Seeing all the 'serious offers' come from guys okay with immigration..).
And WHYYYY would you believe all and everything that such a man - all total strangers and foreigners from different cultures, too!! - now tells and promises you, HOW DO YOU KNOW he is okay, good, honest, not crazy, no psychopath, no ulterior motives???? And he will REALLY provide, will really get a good job, will really buy a house???? Have you seen the educational (job) certificates, the immigration papers, a biiiig suitcase full of cash???? Without THAT I would not believe a thing, anyone can waffle all day long... (example Momen).
Oh, and don't you also need an international divorce?? Meaning even though Momen divorced you in Egypt and sent the paper, don't you still need to have this legalised in an American court?? Doesn't that take a while??? What I am getting at is, though you are divorced IN EGYPT, aren't you still married in the US??
I shall refrain from any further comment, am just really curious to hear the answers to those questions to see how you think on the future... Thanks!!
Regards and be healthy, Bubble
No, this is not about me. This woman has already done the marriage and actually is doing well in the situation.
Posted by Almaz. (Member # 14025) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Yes, there are many Muslimahs in the states (single and no kids!) who are looking for husbands. While I think it is noble to take one saddled down with kids and a freshly signed divorce decree, I can't imagine why they wouldn't want the single/no kids convert.
Because some of these 'morons' that look for a bride online, want a woman that can PRODUCE BABIES like a little machine, and if she has some already it is proof she can conceive.
Plus, some also put a cheaper 'price tag' on divorced women. They think they will get away with anything, on a cheaper scale, than with a never married before younger woman.
They think that they are doing the divorced woman a favour.
Beware of those online HUNTERS!!!
Many stories end up with the woman being brutalized, and treated like an animal.
There are a lot of patients - as far as I know - needing psychological help in Cairo, after suffering from such behavior, following an online marriage of convenience.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
Culture Club, you are asian correct? Which country do you come from?
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Uh oh, Mystic's intrested in an Asian, I'll bet anyone 100 to 1. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Uh oh, Mystic's intrested in an Asian, I'll bet anyone 100 to 1.
Good Lord,girl..we had the same exact thoughts. Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
She is only a pretend muslim and uses only Islam to suit her so explaining why she is soo wrong doesn't even bother her, so I'd save your breath Newcomer because she really isn't a muslim , it's only a role she plays..
She will get exactly what she deserves in life because she doesn't care on bit about her children, they are just an afterthought. Shame I didn't know her in real cause I would call child services on her in a minute, people like her really shouldn't be allowed to breed. She is the perfect example of why we have the vicious cycle of social problems, she can phuck her kids up and they will continue the same cycle they learned from mommy dearest. The son will end up despising her someday and will treat women in the fashion his mother is treated.
As for momen, well Im actually starting to feel sorry for him. Even a bottom dweller deserves better than a retarted half wit He probably realized that selling your soul for a visa when he doesn't have to is just not worth it...
Please stop coming on here and making us nauseated, I personally hope you rot for what your doing to your kids. The dog and oral copulation threads are much better reading than the story of your twisted life .
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<she doesn't care on bit about her children, they are just an afterthought.>
More than afterthought,she acts like they are a side effect. Posted by nasrcity (Member # 15037) on :
i think the children should be taken into care at least they would get some kind of a life and her looked up in a nut house
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: She is only a pretend muslim and uses only Islam to suit her so explaining why she is soo wrong doesn't even bother her, so I'd save your breath Newcomer because she really isn't a muslim , it's only a role she plays..
I don't feel it is up to me to make that judgement call, as to whether she is a Muslim or not, only Allah knows whether she is or not, the level of her faith, and what her real intentions are.
As she has said that she is a Muslim and that she is new to the faith, what it is up to me to do is make sure that she has as accurate information as I can give her, give her reminders, and then the rest is up to her.
I also wanted to share the information with anyone else who might be curious about what the actual rulings were on divorce and the Iddah period in Islam. So no breath wasted rumi Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by nasrcity: i think the children should be taken into care at least they would get some kind of a life and her looked up in a nut house
A Foster Care Home for the children would be a better choice for them. Posted by nasrcity (Member # 15037) on :
i agree sachyra they would have a better up bringing
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
Newcomer didn't waste her breath, it was actually interesting for me to know specifically. I was able to discuss it with my husband tonight, we had a good conversation about that.
Although, I must admit that much of what RUMI wrote is true, at this point you've just gotta feel sorry for those kids. I don't care who you are, there is no way you could hide all of this crap from them, this is just to the point of being obscene. It's just too bad MH doesn't realize it.
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I am free to date so to speak
MH, exactly what is a "so to speak" date and how does it differ, exactly, from any other type of date?
When I first read MH's heart-wrenching story, I really did feel bad for her. But the more she puts her fingers on her keyboard, the more I feel sorry for this Momen guy.
Think about it.
MH values a husband who will swoop in and rescue her from a life of drudgery - working for a living to take care of herself and her children. She wants a gravy train, a dude who will put a roof over their heads, food on the table, pay the bills, and hand her money for a new dress now and then. In return, MH will put out on demand.
Maybe - just maybe - the perpetually villified Momen decided that the kind of life MH wanted for him wasn't a life he wanted for himself, so he tried what he believed was a gentlemanly way out of the marriage and blamed it on his mother. Then, when that didn't work, he resorted to "another woman," knowing that MH would find that behavior completely intolerable.
Yeah. Maybe - just maybe - Momen decided that the woman of his dreams isn't the type who would give it up for a new dress now and then.
So, because MH is hell-bent on getting the fattest wallet she can find, and in spite of the fact that - imagine! - men are smarter than she gives them credit for, she's "interviewing" potential paychecks. Note that she is not dating, because that would be haram. Instead, the rules have been changed to benefit her particular situation, and she is allowed to date but only if she dates "so to speak."
Does anyone else see the absurdity in this, or shall I go on?
Before anyone tries to give MH credit for having an original thought, know she's not the only one out there hunting, er, interviewing. There are many, many, MANY American woman (I cannot speak for the rest of the West), Muslim and otherwise, who actively seek marriages with Muslim Middle-Eastern men because they want the same thing MH does. They, indeed, interview potential candidates.
Once word gets out through the grapevine or at the Mosque that there is a woman who is available, men who "need a wife" line up and these women start picking and choosing. The guy who is most likely to capture her heart 1.) already has a wife back home who he will visit for months at a time so she can have the bed to herself, 2.) works, (extra points for those with a job that keeps them out of the house into the night while earning the best paycheck), 3.) enjoys hanging out with his buddies at the Mosque because if he's not home he's out of her hair, 4.) believes his sister is the best cook in the world because the more the sister cooks the less she has to, 5.) is eager to have children because then she's got him hook, line, and sinker, and 6.) has the money to pay for his own visa/GC problems, if he has them (and many do).
MH is not that special.
Popcorn is losing its luster. Does anyone know how to make caramel corn in the microwave?
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
< But the more she puts her fingers on her keyboard, the more I feel sorry for this Momen guy.>
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I can make it WITH peanuts or walnuts added!
Sadly, I've got to say I can't help but agree. I don't think it is right that Momen entered the marriage not knowing what he got himself into and then found out 'later' but that is the luck of the draw. IMO he is the one who got off clean, he had to pay nothing, he got some free sex, got a new woman and a possible OTHER visa, and he doesn't have to be saddled down with someone else's kids. Ummmm yea, I'm sure he's crying in HIS pillow every night. Posted by nasrcity (Member # 15037) on :
to be honest momen and her can take care of themselves but them poor kids u have to feel sorry for with a mother who is a raving nutter
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
Popcorn & caramel bars aren't cutting it anymore, I'm breaking out the Southern Comfort.
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by VanillaBullshit: Popcorn & caramel bars aren't cutting it anymore, I'm breaking out the Southern Comfort.
I know how to make an awesome Southern Comfort Manhattan!
Anybody want one?
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
NO But I'll have a virgin anything... Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: NO But I'll have a virgin anything...
me too i want a virgin pina colada!!! extra whip cream!!!
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by VanillaBullshit: Popcorn & caramel bars aren't cutting it anymore, I'm breaking out the Southern Comfort.
I know how to make an awesome Southern Comfort Manhattan!
Anybody want one?
Make mine a double.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
If it's about asking what we want to drink,i choose a sparkling bubbly white wine. Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
A sweet red for me please... Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I'll have a wimpy virgin daiquiri...damn it! Ok, seriously this story is driving us all to drink~
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
I'm absolutely convinced MH is NOT the type that has been described above. There might be some missing skills in how to classify potential partners, there might be some missing skills in independancy, there might be some missing skills in awareness, but all that can be described to her 'not knowing herself'. As soon as she gets aware of the fact that she is missing some skills that are needed to live a happy life, she can work on that, and she will be able to love herself after that. Just saying : 'I deserve better' is not the same! She doesn't need to go on the internet, she doesn't need to publish her thoughts on messageboards, she even doesn't need to visit imams. All what's needed is to get clear what she is in real, and which points are her vulnerabilities, so she can be prepared. She might need another person to make this clear, preferable a professional, and then she can start to make things better...
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
?????
yea, good luck with that. Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by VanillaBullshit:
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by VanillaBullshit: Popcorn & caramel bars aren't cutting it anymore, I'm breaking out the Southern Comfort.
I know how to make an awesome Southern Comfort Manhattan!
Anybody want one?
Make mine a double.
Mine too please. Have you got the little umbrellas too?
*passes smucks a cigarette as im sure she needs one badly now*
*opens Pringles*
"I love and in return i am crushed. So my conclusion, better not to love and just make an arrangement instead. I dont get hurt that way."
I have read this a few times. I am a patient woman who can sympathize with your situation....or should I say I 'could' sympathize at the beginning....but you seem to be doing enough of that for yourself.
The above statement is from a person that is overly feeling sorry for herself as she is a 'nice person' and a 'good muslimah' who can provide everything a good muslim man needs. A woman who I bet my last LE is able to turn on the tears like a tap (faucet in American). Mystic you have a severe dependancy problem. A man will smell that a mile off and backtrack like mad, as Momen did.
"I have always gone for love, its always been the basis of my relations. Yes i still love momen, however, he has proven not to deserve it."
OK maybe he didnt, neither did you. You need validation constantly that you are 'nice' and 'wonderful' and 'more deserving' and you do it well for yourself. I 'had' a friend like you who HAD to be centre of attention ALL the time. People had to jump up and throw their arms round her to show how happy they were to see her, she constantly reminded everyone of how 'deserving' and 'nice' and 'wonderful' she was. She 'had' many friends.....for short times....as everyone ends up backing off! Even her man had to ignore calls and have yet another relative die in Safaga every month so he was could get a break until she had a tantrum which backfired on her. Really the population of Safaga has decreased drastically in the last year! They are no longer together.
You dont go for love Mystic, you go for illusion and validation every time.
"No i wont instantly stop loving him but i do know i love how he was, not who he is now. What he and i had isnt coming back, and im sick of being hurt and **** on."
You liked how your fantasy was of him, you didnt 'love' him. You liked how you 'thought' he was in your fantasy. Who he is now is who he has always been and what you had with him was an illusion, a fantasy, this happens a LOT with distance relationships and you haven't spent enough time actually 'with' him to know the difference, so no its not coming back as it was never there in the first place. Do you daydream about many other things a lot too?
"Therefore i have come to the decision that from here on, my life will be basically what alot of muslims do, marry for status and suitability. Find the one that can provide financially, that will be kind and fair, keep to his duties as a muslim husband and me provide to him as i should. Love doesnt need to be included in this, and maybe in time love will follow. Arranged marriage. "
OK you read a book about the ideal Muslim marriage and you think that will sort everything out, yes I thought that when I was a freshy too, the 'ideal muslim' does not exist. The ideal Muslim marriage does not exist....and no thats NOT a cue for you to be the first!
You have been Muslim 5 minutes Mystic and you think you can do all the 'wifely duties' as a good muslim wife and fast and pray and and and..... have you ever tried a 30 day fast mystic? no food, no water, no cigs, no sweets, no breathing in haram smells, no bad thoughts, no mixing with any who could make you break your fast which even covers your thinking! Im not saying you cant do it, but to be totally honest now I dont think Islam is high in your mind right now if it has ever been at all. You are trying a new 'style', a new 'community' to see if you can get what you want and need to make you feel validated and 'nice'. Possibly an Asian now? take my advice and go for a British Pakistani fanatic, lots of them in UK you could grab online or on the dating sites for Muslims. They will have you a fanatic in no time with a bomb strapped to your ass at Heathrow. Then Mystic will be validated a martyr, how 'nice', because thats the role you're playing Mystic. If your faith meant as much to you as you would have people believe then you would not need a man mystic, you would never 'need' a man to validate you. You would be too full of a better 'love', a better 'belonging' and a better 'security' than any man could ever give you.
"No, this is not about me. This woman has already done the marriage and actually is doing well in the situation."
So on 15th April, 13 days ago, she was still single and pregnant and now shes married and doing ok? I dont think 13 days is any time to say they are doing well do you? Please stop playing us for stupid, yes we have a life on ES but we have brains and lives OFF ES, This IS about you OR you are trying to make it look like it 'might' be you to gain more 'oh poor mystic' 'oh look what men do to me' 'oh woe is me!' from people here and possibly you are doing this to your friends in real life if you have any left.
"one of my online friends decided to marry for convenience. Basically she is struggling financially on her own, pregnant with twins, ordered to stop working until after the birth of her babies which is late this year(father doesnt acknowledge their exsistance).. so faced with this she has decided to take an offer of marriage that involves the guy paying all her expenses during the pregnancy if she will marry him after the babies are born and give him what he wants sexually when ever he requests , and basically be a servant to him, cooking, cleaning, whatever. In return he provides financially."
Honestly I despair, if i knew you in real life right this minute I could slap you and shake you, but if I had known you in real life while all this was happening I would have backed away by now knowing there was nothing I could do or say to make you wash the shite from your rose tinted glasses. You are a victim and you seem to LIKE it that way. For phuk sake GROW UP and take responsibility for your actions and your kids and let THEM have a turn at centre of attention. You are not the only woman in the world been hurt and you wont be the last, grown ups move on children wallow in self pity. You are a mother, an adult, its time you acted like one, a wishy washy single mum is NOT a good role model for kids. We all make mistakes but the idea is to learn something from it, you dont.
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha:Have you got the little umbrellas too?
But of course!
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha:You are trying a new 'style', a new 'community' to see if you can get what you want and need to make you feel validated and 'nice'.
I'm not entirely sure "validated" and "nice" have anything to do with it. If they do, it's within the realm of posturing for her new "audience."
Just as it's not "nice" for a man to use a woman for a visa, it's not "nice" for a woman to use a man to escape from her responsibilities. Somehow, in their own twisted sense of reality, these women who marry for nothing more than a meal ticket believe their status is higher than other women - those who work for a living to provide for their children.
Are you gonna share those Pringles?
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: A woman who I bet my last LE is able to turn on the tears like a tap (faucet in American).
we know what a tap is...it's where the beer flows from!!! LOL!
boy, i have sure missed Yuengling! another bonus of being back in PA for a bit! Posted by LovedOne (Member # 10222) on :
quote:Originally posted by newcomer: Even if a couple have been living apart for years, the divorce, and therefore the Iddah (which is the waiting period following divorce or death), doesn't begin until the actual divorce has been declared, or the death occured.
Btw. if the divorce is declared while the woman is having a period, it doesn't count...if it is declared at that time, it has to be said again after she has finished her period, and the timing for the Iddah starts from that declaration.
No one can make an offer for marriage or even discuss another marriage until the Iddah has finished, because the woman still comes under the rulings as a wife until the end of that time. A hint can only be given to a woman who has been irrevocably divorced, i.e. after a third divorce, but an offer cannot be made until the end of the Iddah.
The Iddah ends for a divorced woman by the third period following the declaration of divorce. There are different interpretations as to what the Arabic words used for this means...some interpret them as meaning that it can be at the beginning of the third period following the declaration, others interpret it as meaning when she has finished her third period.
If the woman is pregnant, the Iddah ends whenever she deliveres her child/children; whether or not this is before or after the usual approximately three month Iddah.
The Iddah for a widow, btw. is four months and ten days. [/QB]
If I read this right, if she is pregnant then it will be some time before she can entertain any mans offer of marriage.
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by newcomer:
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: She is only a pretend muslim and uses only Islam to suit her so explaining why she is soo wrong doesn't even bother her, so I'd save your breath Newcomer because she really isn't a muslim , it's only a role she plays..
I don't feel it is up to me to make that judgement call, as to whether she is a Muslim or not, only Allah knows whether she is or not, the level of her faith, and what her real intentions are.
As she has said that she is a Muslim and that she is new to the faith, what it is up to me to do is make sure that she has as accurate information as I can give her, give her reminders, and then the rest is up to her.
I also wanted to share the information with anyone else who might be curious about what the actual rulings were on divorce and the Iddah period in Islam. So no breath wasted rumi
Your right newcomer. It's just extremely insulting when people take on roles for convinience-then wonderful well meaning sincere, experienced people with great advice try to help someone who has no intention of taking it seriously . As for judging, well karma is karma, and bad people with bad intentions have to hold account for that. That being said,I am one of those who always enjoys your posts Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
Aiysha a very good post with lots of points that I think are right on the money. I think we should all address one more issue- how a retarted half wit can get 20 pages of posts.
Thinking about it we are all actually giving her what she wants-to be the center of attention. When the attention starts to turn away she comes up with another "tidbit" to keep interest. If we continue to give her the attention she wants then we are aiding and abetting. Look, she even gets bubblesperson to come back and post "just for her".
We are all in agreement that we are sick of her, she has lost sympathy (which I've pointed out to her that is what happens with women like her), we all think she is a pyscho stalker leech with only one mission in life-land a man, she is a rotten mother who should never breed again, and Momen is a lucky man . What we need to do is stop giving this wackjob this kind of attention.
Crack is Whack!!
I would like to participate in your southern comfort bender ,vb, unfortunately when I was 17 I thought I was smart and drank way too much. I got sick as hell and to this day if I smell it I feel Ill. I'd prefer Mango Margarita's . Got some lime and salt? "Ewe" wanna to do some shots?? Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by LovedOne:
quote:Originally posted by newcomer: If the woman is pregnant, the Iddah ends whenever she delivers her child/children; whether this is before or after the usual approximately three month Iddah.
If I read this right, if she is pregnant then it will be some time before she can entertain any man's offer of marriage. [/QB]
That's right LovedOne, and it also means that her "friend" shouldn't be married now. If the man wanted to help her during her pregnancy, he could have done so by supporting her financially and in any other way she may have needed support, but not as a husband; that proposal should have come after the delivery.
Glad to have been of some use somewhere rumi and smuckers Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by Yes We Can:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I have always gone for love,
Try loving yourself first.
Posted by dia001 (Member # 12044) on :
This is getting all too boring !!!
Just let us all know MH when the twins are due.
I wonder if you spend as much time with your children as you do looking for potential financially secure men !!! and of course writing your Posts to ES.
Get a life woman and learn as a Mother your children come first.
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
quote:Originally posted by dia001: This is getting all too boring !!!
Just let us all know MH when the twins are due.
I wonder if you spend as much time with your children as you do looking for potential financially secure men !!! and of course writing your Posts to ES.
Get a life woman and learn as a Mother your children come first.
I totally agree, well said "dia001".
Although she will start thinking you are her former husband using a different nickname or one of his friends.
You should address your post "dia001" to all the selfish women out there who forget about their kids and look for their own pleasure.
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
quote:Originally posted by Miss Sharm: Mysticheart - Please, please read this thread from beginning to end and listen to the advice that some are trying to give to you.
You are not even out of this marriage properly yet and you are already talking about marrying someone again.
Take some time out from relationships altogether. You are still hurting from this last mariage/relationship and surely if you begin another one without recovering fully it will only lead to disaster. You need to have time in your life without men being the main purpose and then maybe you will realise that there is more to life than men/marriage/realtionships.
Learn to love and respect yourself and then others will do the same back to you.
Amanda x
Well said Amanda.
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
Dear MH,
Why not try to live your life as if you are already married and your husband is working abroad, try to live life as it is, with your kids, your friends (online and offline) without thinking of men and relationships, get busy with your kids take them out talk to them, and good men will come your way.
What is it that you exactly miss about being with a man! Is it sex! Is it love! Passion!
Try to understand yourself first before getting involved in another relationship! You have to understand what you want from a relationship before starting a new relationship where you will be the victim once again and you will be used for sex, visa, money,...etc!
Going in a new relationship without understanding yourself and what you want will make you subject for abuse and use once again.
Good luck MH and take your time dear, life is very short but its much better to live this short life in peace instead of living this short life suffering and being miserable!
Posted by nasrcity (Member # 15037) on :
yes she should put her kids first instead of what seem to be flirting like a headless chicken on the net . to only give herself and those poor kids another lot of heartache. u need to sort ur life out mystic and stop acting like some teenager you have children who depend on you what a way to show kids how to carry on
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
All of us are looking for love, who doesn't want to be with a nice partner who loves him/her and takes good care of him/her, we all need love and we are all looking for someone to love.
I will be so happy to find that person too but i won't be looking around, until i find my better half i will just live life as it is and make the best of every moment and enjoy.
Life is like a train, it passes by many stations, it passes by stations on bad and good neighbourhoods
Just keep your train moving and forget about the bad stations and stay attached to your seat, looking from the window, you don't have to talk to the passengers in the train, you don't have to tell them how you feel or what you are looking for, keep looking around but at the same time keep moving, and when you find that lovely station just stand up and find your way out of the train.
Posted by nasrcity (Member # 15037) on :
well said youngegyptianguy
Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
MMMM Pringles! Crunchy!
Mystic, I had a change of heart this weekend and think you should ABSOLUTELY marry the next Muslim guy that walks past you. Make sure he has the bruised forehead of a devout man, and the teremity to bathe daily.
Marrying strangers is always a good idea!! yOU ARE THE smartest woman ever, and you are capably handling all your issues! Good Job and Good Luck!
I'd love to send a care package for the little ones. When are they due? If it would help, we will take the foundlings in and raise them as a brother to our son. I have experince with adoption, and well Mister K is a lot of things, but a quitter he is not, so he'd be a splendind adoptive father.
Stay in touch!
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<instead of what seem to be flirting like a headless chicken on the net.>
ROFL Posted by Lumos (Member # 14589) on :
MH is in danger of becoming an ES cartoon character. I honestly used to wonder if she was a troll, as I had difficulty believing that women behave as she does. Sadly, she is quite real and quite the manipulator. She is good at it too. The sympathy card, she plays to perfection. She is the heroine in her own story - the brave victim of bad bad men, the world over. I used to have some sympathy for her, as did others. It was wasted. Her children are the ones I feel so sad for. Imagine having a mother who spends $12500 dollars on a man (by her own admission), yet tells ES that she can only afford to treat her kids to a restaurant meal once a year (oh, but the kids get to choose anything they want from the menu)? It seems like only weeks ago, MH was telling us how she couldn't breathe without Momen - now she is bartering for sex in a marriage with a man she doesn't love? What the hell must her poor children think? If we are confused, how must they feel?
I am sick of MH telling us all what a lovely, nice person she is - when her actions betray her as a selfish woman with the emotional maturity of a fourteen year old girl. I have seen her lie and cover for one of the biggest trolls on ES, showing me that she is far from 'nice'. This is one reason I never bought in to her 'pious' muslim act. Decent people don't lie for psychos, whatever their faith is or isn't. She appears to use Islam as little more than a marketing tool. I have nothing but contempt for the way she tried to brandish her faith to beat Momen with.
MH doesn't want to change or learn from anything said here. She doesn't need love, she needs drama and attention. It doesn't matter at all if it's negative.
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
MH and many other women used this forum to lie and pretend to be someone they are not and we all believed them while most of them are 120% fake.
They used everything they can, from religion to emotions, to make them appear as saints.
At the end, we don't know her or know her husband or know any other member here, how the hell can we judge this member or that! and according to what! why the hell shall we believe MH or any other member!
Let anyone say what they want, we are not buying anything.
Well said Lumos.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Bullshit, YEG ! The fact that we don't know who is behind a nick and therefor we wouldn't judge, counts for you as it counts for me. Perhaps you also are not what you pretend to be here, either. We all make judgements based on what somebody wites down, and sometimes we get the feeling being fooled because the stories are to unlikely. The only argument you could use against these women is the fact that we're only hearing one side of the story, but again this is the case on every problem-advice institution. If I'm visiting a shrink because of my problems in case of a far away-lover, he/she also can't do anything else as advicing the person regarding her/his side of the story. Stating that these women are not all all the ones they claim to be, counts also for the men in question who are blamed for not being the noes they claim to be. If you're having objections against one sided stories and are doubting about the rate of truth in their stories, you better leave this kind of boards alone.
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
quote:Originally posted by ?????: Bullshit, YEG ! The fact that we don't know who is behind a nick and therefor we wouldn't judge, counts for you as it counts for me. Perhaps you also are not what you pretend to be here, either. We all make judgements based on what somebody wites down, and sometimes we get the feeling being fooled because the stories are to unlikely. The only argument you could use against these women is the fact that we're only hearing one side of the story, but again this is the case on every problem-advice institution. If I'm visiting a shrink because of my problems in case of a far away-lover, he/she also can't do anything else as advicing the person regarding her/his side of the story. Stating that these women are not all all the ones they claim to be, counts also for the men in question who are blamed for not being the noes they claim to be. If you're having objections against one sided stories and are doubting about the rate of truth in their stories, you better leave this kind of boards alone.
Mr/Miss/Mrs 5 Question Marks,
Relax and take it easy (5 question marks), believe what you want to believe. as simple as that!
Posted by Lumos (Member # 14589) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: MH and many other women used this forum to lie and pretend to be someone they are not and we all believed them while most of them are 120% fake.
They used everything they can, from religion to emotions, to make them appear as saints.
At the end, we don't know her or know her husband or know any other member here, how the hell can we judge this member or that! and according to what! why the hell shall we believe MH or any other member!
Let anyone say what they want, we are not buying anything.
Well said Lumos.
YEG, I'm sure you'll agree that some men on ES are far from saints either. Perhaps it's because there are fewer men that we see fewer 'Love Gone Wrong' tales from them, what do you think? You are right about it being natural for people to seek love and it's easy to make mistakes. Making the same ones over and over again takes a lot of dedication though, doesn't it?
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Do I sound upset? This is the western way to express and maybe I might have made another impression to you, but I'm perfectly relaxed, thank you! And of course I believe what I want to believe.. Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
????? have a great day
Posted by Yowza (Member # 14400) on :
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: MMMM Pringles! Crunchy!
Mystic, I had a change of heart this weekend and think you should ABSOLUTELY marry the next Muslim guy that walks past you. Make sure he has the bruised forehead of a devout man, and the teremity to bathe daily.
Marrying strangers is always a good idea!! yOU ARE THE smartest woman ever, and you are capably handling all your issues! Good Job and Good Luck!
I'd love to send a care package for the little ones. When are they due? If it would help, we will take the foundlings in and raise them as a brother to our son. I have experince with adoption, and well Mister K is a lot of things, but a quitter he is not, so he'd be a splendind adoptive father.
Stay in touch!
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: All of us are looking for love, who doesn't want to be with a nice partner who loves him/her and takes good care of him/her, we all need love and we are all looking for someone to love.
I will be so happy to find that person too but i won't be looking around, until i find my better half i will just live life as it is and make the best of every moment and enjoy.
Life is like a train, it passes by many stations, it passes by stations on bad and good neighbourhoods
Just keep your train moving and forget about the bad stations and stay attached to your seat, looking from the window, you don't have to talk to the passengers in the train, you don't have to tell them how you feel or what you are looking for, keep looking around but at the same time keep moving, and when you find that lovely station just stand up and find your way out of the train.
Good post, YoungEgyptianGuy. Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
Just a few things to add to this post
Ayisha - bless your heart you have finally flipped, you were being so patient x
Smuckers - I have been unable to think of anything else since I read 'peanut and walnut popcorn' I beg you for the recipe.
Rumi - ditto with the southern comfort story, my very first boyfriend used to drink it, once i got too drunk on it and never ever could stand even the smell of it again!
cultureclub - when I read your posts the first thing that jumped to my mind was 'o.k so this is one of the prospective new husbands', this was confirmed by Mystics question to you. If this is true please do not wrap this up in Islamic piousness and accept that Mystic is very vulnerable now and it would not be Islamic to take advantage of someone in a vulnerable state.
Mystic - there is nothing I can say that hasn't already been said before. Before long your children will have left the nest, you wont be able to turn back the clock and hold their hand on the way to school, or play with them in the garden, have a hug whenever you want one, look at their little smily faces or listen to the way they understand the world and the little stories they tell. I love my husband immensly but nothing compares to those times that we share with our children. I ditto everything everyone has said to you and urge you to re read all these posts and previous ones all on the same subject. So many people give you their time to try and make you see things clearly, so many people, in their own way trying to help you. They dont have to do that, they could ignore you but they dont. Be grateful for that and all the other things you have and stop looking for something else, because that is just greed.
Posted by Rashaa (Member # 15206) on :
21 pages and counting :-)
Posted by Miss Sharm (Member # 12405) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: I will be so happy to find that person too but i won't be looking around, until i find my better half i will just live life as it is and make the best of every moment and enjoy.
Good words YoungEgyptianGuy - We all need to make the best of the life that we have been given and life it to the full.
Mystic, please do not go looking at every guy as though they are potential marriage material because you will come across as being desperate and some of the guys will read the signals and sadly take advantage of you.
Seriously, Mystic, not that you will listen to me or others, take some time out and away from relationships and least of all offers of marriage because it will only lead to disaster and do you really think that you can live the next years of your life in a loveless marriage?
Momen might be over you but can you really say that you are over him? I know that you seem to be craving so much love and attention but can you not get that from your kids and friends? Believe me there is more to life than relationships and marriage.
Take time, a lot of time and think and think and think again what is important to you. Do you really think of yourself so low and 2nd best that you want to get involved in an arranged marriage with a guy that you do not know.
I am sure that you will not listen to the advice on here, or you will only listen to what you think is nice and want us all to say. Well, you have been told Mystic.
Amanda x
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I have a feel chopsticks are in order.....
Posted by Snapdragon (Member # 9036) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: She is only a pretend muslim and uses only Islam to suit her so explaining why she is soo wrong doesn't even bother her, so I'd save your breath Newcomer because she really isn't a muslim , it's only a role she plays..
She will get exactly what she deserves in life because she doesn't care on bit about her children, they are just an afterthought. Shame I didn't know her in real cause I would call child services on her in a minute, people like her really shouldn't be allowed to breed. She is the perfect example of why we have the vicious cycle of social problems, she can phuck her kids up and they will continue the same cycle they learned from mommy dearest. The son will end up despising her someday and will treat women in the fashion his mother is treated.
As for momen, well Im actually starting to feel sorry for him. Even a bottom dweller deserves better than a retarted half wit He probably realized that selling your soul for a visa when he doesn't have to is just not worth it...
Please stop coming on here and making us nauseated, I personally hope you rot for what your doing to your kids. The dog and oral copulation threads are much better reading than the story of your twisted life .
PERFECT...I LOVE IT! Posted by civil society (Member # 14880) on :
i find it extremely interesting that everyone is so willing to harp on women (not just mh) for 'not paying attention to their children' when there are also men that father children and just walk away w-out ever even looking back. those that live in glass houses...
Posted by Culture Club (Member # 13767) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Culture Club, you are asian correct? Which country do you come from?
Yes, I am Asian non Arab. I come from Indonesia. Is there anything I can help you?
Posted by gab (Member # 14577) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Just looking to the future. One particular guy in mind, he mentioned the offer to me, not the other way. He is willing to move here to me, is already in states, doesnt need me for any sort of visa or immigration issue. He is looking for a wife to give him children and take care of his needs, must be a covering muslimah that sees to her prayers and fasting... Well i can provide for all of that... He has work offers that he can accept here that will provide decently for the family, has offered to buy a new home for us though i already own my own, I may work if i wish though it is not required, he will provide everything we need, including anything my children need, anything that i make from my work if i choose to remain working is mine to keep for whatever i choose. All in all i think not a bad offer. Still thinking on it, and have a couple others i need to speak to before making my final decision on which person would be best. The ones i am considering all offer about the same thing, just each is in various states of immigration status and from different countries, gotta decide as well which culture is best suited for me to live with.
In your dreams lol Posted by DawnBev08 (Member # 14964) on :
interesting point Civil Society - re we harp on about women not looking after their kids right, and men are <nearly> always abandoning theirs without a second glance -
wonder why that is :
maybe because we are so used to men abandoning their kids, its become part of the norm
and / or
mothers are supposed to be THE nurterer (spelling??) - who would never abandon their kids - that all-emcompassing mothering instinct
what do others think?
but what really bugs me is when there is an article in a magazine about a single dad raising his kids, by golly, all on his own! wow! how does he manage it!! women have been doing this for years - and dont get a pat on the back - we get slated for the wrongs and ills of society etc
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Culture Club:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Culture Club, you are asian correct? Which country do you come from?
Yes, I am Asian non Arab. I come from Indonesia. Is there anything I can help you?
Jackpot. Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by DawnBev08: interesting point Civil Society - re we harp on about women not looking after their kids right, and men are <nearly> always abandoning theirs without a second glance -
wonder why that is :
maybe because we are so used to men abandoning their kids, its become part of the norm
and / or
mothers are supposed to be THE nurterer (spelling??) - who would never abandon their kids - that all-emcompassing mothering instinct
what do others think?
but what really bugs me is when there is an article in a magazine about a single dad raising his kids, by golly, all on his own! wow! how does he manage it!! women have been doing this for years - and dont get a pat on the back - we get slated for the wrongs and ills of society etc
Traditionally the women are the ones who are taking care of the children, just like female animals are doing the same. It is in their gens partly, but also societies still see it as a womans job. I know enough men who are raising their children, and they all do a marvellous job. Most of the time they are offering much more structure and rules to the children as a single woman does. Though, it isn't an ideal situation, a child has to be raised by a mother and a father. When you're talking to people who have been raised up by a single parent, they all admit that they've missed something. Sometimes it cannot be avoided, in case of the mother/father died, but in case of divorce, it's another story. In case of several divorces, I think all the children are marked, and they all will get problems in their own relationships. When the parent isn't capable to have an relationship, the children get the wrong example...
Posted by civil society (Member # 14880) on :
i agree with both of you. i also believe it is a sign of the man's character as to what he does with his child/children. if he runs or if he remains involved speaks volumes about him.
i, too, know children being raised by their fathers. they are highly involved fathers and are doing a great job. i think divorced parents CAN do a good job, but it's up to the parents to maintain a level of maturity to make it work. it's those parents that are a rarity.
Posted by DawnBev (Member # 11276) on :
this is the main reason why when I divorced from Sam's dad - I decided Sam's emotional wellbeing was paramount - I stayed on reasonably good terms with him, it was hard at first, but after a couple of years, it was 'nothing' -
I dont think I could have coped with the stress of everything if there were arguments and fighting -
I think I missed out financially, I think I would have got a better settlement had I gone to court, but we wanted to avoid lawyer's costs. I just moved out and moved on .........
Sam gets on well his step-mother, as I do, and their 6 yr old often stays with us - he and Sam are inseparable - I have some photos of them together I've posted before -
he's staying with us for the weekend in a couple of weeks.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I have a feel chopsticks are in order.....
do you mean you are cooking chinese for us or wanting to play the piano?? Posted by DawnBev (Member # 11276) on :
at the end of the day, I think I get the best deal:
I still get to spend his money
whereas the second wife has to sleep with him!!!!!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I have a feel chopsticks are in order.....
do you mean you are cooking chinese for us or wanting to play the piano??
cooking. Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I have a feel chopsticks are in order.....
do you mean you are cooking chinese for us or wanting to play the piano??
Posted by harankash (Member # 14248) on :
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:
quote:Originally posted by Culture Club:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Culture Club, you are asian correct? Which country do you come from?
Yes, I am Asian non Arab. I come from Indonesia. Is there anything I can help you?
Jackpot.
Somebody`s found a new niche/forum/board A fresh,understanding newbie pops in to rescue the "nice" woman from the bullies. Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I have a feel chopsticks are in order.....
do you mean you are cooking chinese for us or wanting to play the piano??
cooking.
I really miss battered chicken balls and sweet and sour sauce
and Warburtons bread
and real fish and chips
and
and
and
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
Just a quick check on ES (from Egypt ) Can't believe it's page 21!!!
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Makbeta: Just a quick check on ES (from Egypt ) Can't believe it's page 21!!!
Have a great time,Makbeta!! Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8:
quote:Originally posted by Makbeta: Just a quick check on ES (from Egypt ) Can't believe it's page 21!!!
Have a great time,Makbeta!!
Thanks. See yaaaa!
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
Makbeta!! You are in Egypt and you didn't tell me!! Who is going to post songs in the music thread now?? Just kidding, have a great time!! Enjoy and relax after all those working days.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
What would be the perfect song to go with this story for this thread? Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
here i go again on my own , goin down the only road i've ever known ... here i go again but can't for the life of me remember the group Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by civil society: i find it extremely interesting that everyone is so willing to harp on women (not just mh) for 'not paying attention to their children' when there are also men that father children and just walk away w-out ever even looking back. those that live in glass houses...
It's not about harping on a woman, civil society. If a man came on here and posted over the past 3 yrs of constantly running off for a month every 6 months and leaves his children, spends 12,000 dollars on vacations to meet women yet only takes his kids to the park and dinner "once a year as a special treat" to "conserve money" then he would get the same crap. Mystic has clearly posted these things many times in a public forum, I don't think that it is too out of the ordinary for a forum mostly with women(many of us mothers) too find this unacceptable behavior.
I have been divorced for almost 7 years and my children come first before a man , bottom line. It is my responsibilty and their happiness is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING to me . I couldn't imagine making my children go without so I could use the money to go land a husband . I make sure they have everything, I take them on trips first, I want them to have fun and a lifetime of memories. Who I will spend my future with knows this and expects it, bottom line. How could you expect any less of a woman you are considering marrying and possibly having more children with???
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
One more point I forgot to make-as a parent you are responsible for your child's safety and emotional well being. A woman who constantly has shown that she is mentally unstable the way MH has done on here, being emotionally immature will pass this on to her children unfortunately. How right is that-it is emotional abuse and will have lasting damage to her children.
We all make mistakes, no one is the perfect parent, but those who exhibit behavior that can permantely damage a childs pshyche, then they should not be allowed to do it. Advocate can tell you as she is a social worker how this affects children-attachment disorders, low self-esteem, the list goes on.Very heartbreaking as our children are our future, they are very precious and should be taken care of. Just because we as humans are able to breed doesnt mean that some people should Posted by davieschristopher (Member # 15225) on :
quote:Originally posted by manx: here i go again on my own , goin down the only road i've ever known ... here i go again but can't for the life of me remember the group
Whitesnake kicks azz my friend! Love that song! Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
yup , cool azz rock chick i is mate
Posted by davieschristopher (Member # 15225) on :
I hear you. I am a big fan of all kinds or music EXECPT country and gospel! Ewwwwwwww.....lol Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
gangsta and rap... hip hop and garage Ewwwwwwwwww Posted by Bonzo (Member # 12594) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv:
quote:Originally posted by civil society: i find it extremely interesting that everyone is so willing to harp on women (not just mh) for 'not paying attention to their children' when there are also men that father children and just walk away w-out ever even looking back. those that live in glass houses...
It's not about harping on a woman, civil society. If a man came on here and posted over the past 3 yrs of constantly running off for a month every 6 months and leaves his children, spends 12,000 dollars on vacations to meet women yet only takes his kids to the park and dinner "once a year as a special treat" to "conserve money" then he would get the same crap. Mystic has clearly posted these things many times in a public forum, I don't think that it is too out of the ordinary for a forum mostly with women(many of us mothers) too find this unacceptable behavior.
I have been divorced for almost 7 years and my children come first before a man , bottom line. It is my responsibilty and their happiness is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING to me . I couldn't imagine making my children go without so I could use the money to go land a husband . I make sure they have everything, I take them on trips first, I want them to have fun and a lifetime of memories. Who I will spend my future with knows this and expects it, bottom line. How could you expect any less of a woman you are considering marrying and possibly having more children with???
Bingo. . .
The other concern about MH and her hunt for a man would be the fact these men may intentionally seek women with young children for their own sexual gratification (pedophils).
Great. . .MH finds a man with money to provide for her and her kids & all she has to do is spread her legs when he wants. I don't think it's ever that simple. What a miserable life. I'd much rather struggle financially than be at some man's beck and call because he has the money.
How many times have you heard of the step-fathers abusing their step-children. MH would be the type of person who is so afraid of being without a man that I see her possibly being in denial if told of any abuse or her children would be scared to tell her because they know their mom would never take their side for fear of losing her man.
Extremely sad situation.
Posted by cbrbddd (Member # 3891) on :
Boulevard of Broken Dreams . . . I walk a lonely road The only one that I have ever known Don't know where it goes But it's home to me and I walk alone
I walk this empty street On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams Where the city sleeps and I'm the only one and I walk alone
I walk alone I walk alone
I walk alone
My shadow's the only one that walks beside me My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me 'Til then I walk alone
Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah
I'm walking down the line That divides me somewhere in my mind On the border line Of the edge and where I walk alone
Read between the lines What's fu*ked up and everything's alright Check my vital signs To know I'm still alive and I walk alone
I walk alone I walk alone
I walk alone
Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
That was actually green days only good song..
Posted by civil society (Member # 14880) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vader: That was actually green days only good song..
noooooooooo way! they had a bunch of awesome stuff. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I liked some of green day's stuff.
Rumi and Bonzo are (sadly) right in this. There is an entire spectrum of this crap on here it seems, what the heck ever happened to the mother putting her life in harms way to protect her child? Seems now some just make sure they have clothes, food and someplace to sleep and think their jobs are done.
BTW my vote for the appropriate song would be:
"Just A Girl"
Take this pink ribbon off my eyes I'm exposed And it's no big surprise Don't you think I know Exactly where I stand This world is forcing me To hold your hand 'Cause I'm just a girl, little 'ol me Don't let me out of your sight I'm just a girl, all pretty and petite So don't let me have any rights
Oh...I've had it up to here! The moment that I step outside So many reasons For me to run and hide I can't do the little things I hold so dear 'Cause it's all those little things That I fear
'Cause I'm just a girl I'd rather not be 'Cause they won't let me drive Late at night I'm just a girl, Guess I'm some kind of freak 'Cause they all sit and stare With their eyes
I'm just a girl, Take a good look at me Just your typical prototype
Oh...I've had it up to here! Oh...am I making myself clear? I'm just a girl I'm just a girl in the world... That's all that you'll let me be! I'm just a girl, living in captivity Your rule of thumb Makes me worry some
I'm just a girl, what's my destiny? What I've succumbed to Is making me numb I'm just a girl, my apologies What I've become is so burdensome I'm just a girl, lucky me Twiddle-dum there's no comparison
Oh...I've had it up to! Oh...I've had it up to!! Oh...I've had it up to here!
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
Cypress Hill - Stank Ass Hoe
[Sen Dog] Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Once again, ha ha ha We back, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
[B-Real] Now all these new nigas tryin to bust grips Keep tryin, I'm shittin all over yo tapes And yo CDs, you see these Niggas wit the weed leaves, you need these Hill biggas to bust trigga, sicka sicka The rhyme spitter spittin over the transmittor I got double platinum records on the wall While you got double cheeseburgers in yo toilet stall Cats wanna try me, you must be high Cause you havin fuckin +Illusions+, no lie, what you usin? Gimme some of that shït (shït), you fakin it Any little title you got, I'm takin it You can't have it, you didn't earn it Spit on yo name, shït on it, and burn it Suckas wanna floss and play the big boss What movie you livin in and how much did it cost? What role are you playin? I'm only sayin You're the record gettin played and I'm DJ'in Playin you, playin you, and playin you Decayin you, I'm tyin and breakin you (ah ha ha)
[Chorus: B-Real (Sen Dog)] You're a weak ass hoe Punk slow yo role You're nothin but a clone With nothin to show You're a weak ass hoe Need a style of your own You're a weak ass hoe You're a weak ass hoe (Punk ass nigga) Leave me alone (Carbon copyin muthafucka) Punk nigga wit no flow (You ain't shït) You're a weak ass hoe (ƒuck your little record, punk) You're a weak ass hoe (Eat a dick)
[B-Real] Now look at her over there (damn), lookin all fine Shakin her ass, tellin me to grab from behind Please don't mind me, you'll find me Rollin the pine trees, women askin to sign these Well OK, but you're gonna get me in trouble Nice ones, I gotta be out on the double I'll be in that corner table wit my homies Gettin stoney tryin to avoid the phonies Huh, what you askin? Do I got plastic To buy you and yo friends drinks? Do I have assets? Do I got a big home? Do I live alone? Can I use yo cell phone?, feelin my bone She wanna ride me, she wanna tie me Around her tiny little finger and ride me blindly I don't think so, you stink, hoe The chain in yo brain is missin a link, hoe Please back up, I know you look good But that ain't enough to get half of my stuff, bitch (ah ha ha, that's right, you're a stank hoe!)
[Chorus: B-Real (Sen Dog)] You're a stank ass hoe Tryin to get dough Leave me alone Cause you can't roll You're a stank ass hoe Nut ridin pro You're a stank ass hoe A stank ass hoe Leave me alone (Broke ass hoodrat) You can't roll (You can't roll) You're a stank ass hoe A stank ass hoe (Stank ass hoe) You're a stank ass hoe (Dick suckin tramp) (Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha) (Bring it back homie, come on, huh)
[B-Real] Here goes another example to begin it With a twist (yeah) like pussy I'm in it When I look at me, I look and see How long it took for you to throw the book at me Damn that shït hurts, but I put in work These niggas are like germs, over the counter they lurk And smirk when you fall down, but I calm down And put the anti-bacterial assault down Kill germs that wanna test, they want the best Comparin you to me is like a nigga to the cess Never settle for stress, or wack rappers I'm rockin the outta the West and rockin the East (?)
[Chorus: B-Real (Sen Dog)] (Punk ass nigga) You're a bitch ass hoe Knockin on my door Leave me alone Cause you got no soul You're a bitch ass hoe (Trick ass hoe) Need to find a place to go You're a bitch ass hoe (Punk ass niggas) You're a bitch ass hoe Don't touch the microphone You're a bitch ass hoe (Eat a muthafuckin dick) You're a bitch ass hoe Leave me alone Got no place to go You're a bitch ass hoe (Trick ass hoe) [humming]
Posted by Snidely Whiplash (Member # 15126) on :
and how do that song relate to this thread? Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
For some reason that Buckcherry song comes to mind....
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
Yesssssssssssssssssss!
Page 22!
I did it!
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bonzo:
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv:
quote:Originally posted by civil society: i find it extremely interesting that everyone is so willing to harp on women (not just mh) for 'not paying attention to their children' when there are also men that father children and just walk away w-out ever even looking back. those that live in glass houses...
It's not about harping on a woman, civil society. If a man came on here and posted over the past 3 yrs of constantly running off for a month every 6 months and leaves his children, spends 12,000 dollars on vacations to meet women yet only takes his kids to the park and dinner "once a year as a special treat" to "conserve money" then he would get the same crap. Mystic has clearly posted these things many times in a public forum, I don't think that it is too out of the ordinary for a forum mostly with women(many of us mothers) too find this unacceptable behavior.
I have been divorced for almost 7 years and my children come first before a man , bottom line. It is my responsibilty and their happiness is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING to me . I couldn't imagine making my children go without so I could use the money to go land a husband . I make sure they have everything, I take them on trips first, I want them to have fun and a lifetime of memories. Who I will spend my future with knows this and expects it, bottom line. How could you expect any less of a woman you are considering marrying and possibly having more children with???
Bingo. . .
The other concern about MH and her hunt for a man would be the fact these men may intentionally seek women with young children for their own sexual gratification (pedophils).
Great. . .MH finds a man with money to provide for her and her kids & all she has to do is spread her legs when he wants. I don't think it's ever that simple. What a miserable life. I'd much rather struggle financially than be at some man's beck and call because he has the money.
How many times have you heard of the step-fathers abusing their step-children. MH would be the type of person who is so afraid of being without a man that I see her possibly being in denial if told of any abuse or her children would be scared to tell her because they know their mom would never take their side for fear of losing her man.
Extremely sad situation.
Bonzo`s concerns brought this sad real story to my mind.Everyone should take a look:
Maybe we should be going for that song which Edith Piaf sings: "Non, Je ne regrette rien" . . . because when it comes right down to it, you have to move on with your life!
No! No regrets No! I will have no regrets All the things That went wrong For at last I have learned to be strong
No! No regrets No! I will have no regrets For the grief doesn't last It is gone I've forgotten the past
And the memories I had I no longer desire Both the good and the bad I have flung in a fire And I feel in my heart That the seed has been sown It is something quite new It's like nothing I've known
Posted by Pothead_Barbie (Member # 15091) on :
u guys are nerds lol
Posted by davieschristopher (Member # 15225) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting: For some reason that Buckcherry song comes to mind....
I love Buckcherry! "Hey, you're a crazy bitch, but you fukk so good...." My favorite song! Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pothead_Barbie: u guys are nerds lol
thats so funny classic!!ya dont hear that too often anymore!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by davieschristopher:
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting: For some reason that Buckcherry song comes to mind....
I love Buckcherry! "Hey, you're a crazy bitch, but you fukk so good...." My favorite song!
Posted by cbrbddd (Member # 3891) on :
Smuckers, we are being over run by adolescents . . . so they think it is ok to call a woman a B*tch and talk about f*cking all the time. This kind of stuff bores me to tears . . . there are more things to life than talking so ugly about those around you.
Oops . . . i'll probably get it now!
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
i'm telling you all, i said it before, ES theme song should be Jimmy Buffet's "Fruitcakes"...
Fruitcakes in the kitchen Fruitcakes on the street Struttin naked through the crosswalk In the middle of the week Half-baked cookies in the oven Half-baked people on the bus Theres a little bit of fruitcake left in everyone of us
quote:Originally posted by cbrbddd: Smuckers, we are being over run by adolescents . . . so they think it is ok to call a woman a B*tch and talk about f*cking all the time. This kind of stuff bores me to tears . . . there are more things to life than talking so ugly about those around you.
Oops . . . i'll probably get it now!
Excuse me, I said I like the song. That doesn't mean I disrespect a women like that. I see a women as more than a 'fukk' but a life long partner. Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
davieschristopher, can I call you dave or chris, choose one please, the original is too long and so is 'new fella with beer'
Posted by Lumos (Member # 14589) on :
"Theres a little bit of fruitcake left in everyone of us"
Yeah, but some have all of their currants missing. Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
call him DC AYISHA I DO .. Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Nope I still think "The lunatics have taken over the asylum" by The Specials, has to be in with a chance Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
lord i remember it well. Y.A.H
Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
da dum da dum da dum.. or maybe happy house .. siouxie and the banshees Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Oh sioxsie and the Banshees, Yes!!
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
*waiting patiently for MysticMagic to come back with fresh new luuuuv adventures under her sleeve* Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: davieschristopher, can I call you dave or chris, choose one please, the original is too long and so is 'new fella with beer'
I agree, too long of a name ~
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8: *waiting patiently for MysticMagic to come back with fresh new luuuuv adventures under her sleeve*
Nope.
I don't think she'll be back. I think she's said everything she wants her almost but not quite but then again it doesn't matter ex-husband to read.
She's off to the next one.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
She will always be back ~
Posted by davieschristopher (Member # 15225) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: davieschristopher, can I call you dave or chris, choose one please, the original is too long and so is 'new fella with beer'
Hey, yeah, call me either or. I don't really care as long as I know you are directing it toward me! DC is a good one I would suppose! Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8: *waiting patiently for MysticMagic to come back with fresh new luuuuv adventures under her sleeve*
Nope.
I don't think she'll be back. I think she's said everything she wants her almost but not quite but then again it doesn't matter ex-husband to read.
She's off to the next one.
I bet anything she must be on an Oriental board/forum with Culture Club. Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
He is not my almost but not quite ex, he is my exhusband, legally april 6th. I spoke with a different Imam about when i am considered divorced in Islam, he says nothing to do with papers, it goes from time of seperation. The wait is 3 menstrual cycles from time of seperation.. Seperation Feb 13th , I have had 3 already going on 4th so, waiting period is over. I told Imam that he didnt inform me of intention to divorce until March 7th and he said didnt matter because the intention was in his heart. The whole waiting period is designed to ensure no pregnancy.So he advised that to be safe to wait about 2 more weeks to consider the waiting time officially over, however did advise that it is ok that i have began the search as long as a marriage does not take place before the waiting time is over, so. that makes 2 imams from different states that have said same. And anything i have to say to momen i email to him so i dont need to post here for him to know anything.
Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
quote:Originally posted by desertgirl: Makbeta!! You are in Egypt and you didn't tell me!! Who is going to post songs in the music thread now?? Just kidding, have a great time!! Enjoy and relax after all those working days.
OMG This thread is not dead yet??!!
Here I am in Egypt and find my life without ES (especially my Music Thread) simply unbearable!! Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: He is not my almost but not quite ex, he is my exhusband, legally april 6th. I spoke with a different Imam about when i am considered divorced in Islam, he says nothing to do with papers, it goes from time of seperation. The wait is 3 menstrual cycles from time of seperation.. Seperation Feb 13th , I have had 3 already going on 4th so, waiting period is over. I told Imam that he didnt inform me of intention to divorce until March 7th and he said didnt matter because the intention was in his heart. The whole waiting period is designed to ensure no pregnancy.So he advised that to be safe to wait about 2 more weeks to consider the waiting time officially over, however did advise that it is ok that i have began the search as long as a marriage does not take place before the waiting time is over, so. that makes 2 imams from different states that have said same. And anything i have to say to momen i email to him so i dont need to post here for him to know anything.
so the 'separation' time is from when you left Egypt? Going by this then, if a man and woman are not actually living together, as in the man works away, and he then says he wants a divorce after being away 6 months, there is no waiting time as its all been done beforehand?
newcomer any advice on this?
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
That is the way they both explained it to me, because the whole purpose of the waiting period is to ensure there is no possibility of pregnancy, and if you have not been living together sharing the same bed or having intimate relations there is no possibility
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
MysticHeart......weeeeeeeee!!! Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
hi tonya how ya been?
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
That makes no sense...I think separation means when you were separated as the divorce was declared. Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: That makes no sense...I think separation means when you were separated as the divorce was declared.
Smuckers, let me break it down for you: According to the two virtual Imams who advised MH about such matters on two individual message boards with domains domiciled in two different states it's not the date the divorce was declared, but the date she decided the Evil Momen might have found divorce an option in his heart.
Now that might not have been the answer MH would have received if she could have dragged her grieving self out of her car in the parking lot of her own Mosque, walked in, and had a face-to-face, honest, and open discussion with an Imam there, but this answer works for HER, so that's the way it's gonna be.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
lol
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
May I suggest that you also verify the qualifications of this second Imam to give you a Fatwa, as anyone who has studied Islamic law to any depth will tell you that it is only Allah who knows what is in a person’s heart and that legal rulings are made on what is apparent not on what is assumed.
The linguistic definition of Talaq (divorce) is “setting free” or "undoing of, or releasing from a knot" and in the view of Islam, divorce means the immediate and future annulment of the marriage contract. There are no specific prescribed words in the Quran that are to be used by a husband to pronounce divorce to his wife. However, the words, either declared in writing or verbally, should convey the intention of the husband to dissolve the marriage , such as saying: “I hereby divorce you!” or indirectly saying, “I hereby consider you unlawful to me!”
If you read the Islamic law books, you will see many discussions about the conditions of the lawfulness of a declaration of divorce, such as that it can’t be pronounced during menstruation, and, if it is, it has to be said again during a period of ritual purity after the menstruation and without having had intercourse. The divorce then starts from the second declaration, not the first intention. There are other discussions about under what conditions a divorce if lawful when pronounced during anger or intoxication or a time of insanity. There is never any discussion about how do we guess when he first intended to do it, because that is a non issue. When the husband intended to do it is not the issue, the issue is whether he intended it when he declared it!
The waiting period isn’t only to see whether the woman is pregnant or not, if that were the case, post-menopausal woman would have no `Iddah, but they have to wait for three months from the declaration. It is something prescribed by Allah following the death of a husband or a declaration of divorce.
As to searching for a new husband while still in `Iddah, please go and ask that Imam, as you are still considered to be under the ruling of a wife when you are in your `Iddah, how it can possibly be ok to be looking for another husband?! I know that you are new to Islam and things seem confusing, but you really do need to find people with sound knowledge to advise you, and it would appear that the Imams near you either do not have good knowledge, or what is possibly more likely, that they don’t know how to express it clearly in good English.
And I’ll leave you to continue the research now...and may Allah be your Guide and then those with sound knowledge!
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: She will always be back ~
Smuckers was right... She must have a crystal ball. Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
MH, why the rush to marry? Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
thanks newcomer
MH, paltalk or yahoo 'imams' dont count
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: thanks newcomer
MH, paltalk or yahoo 'imams' dont count
whats paltalk and imams????? u know some women do enjoy the comforts of having a man around wethere it be for love money or companionship! who are we to tell her she cant do that!if it makes her happy i am happy for her!! as long as he is good to her he may just be the one for her!! but mystic dear i dont agree with somethings they say! dont spend no money on him!!let him be the giver!! let him come to u!!!
Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal: if it makes her happy
But it doesn't. That's the point.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: That makes no sense...I think separation means when you were separated as the divorce was declared.
Smuckers, let me break it down for you: According to the two virtual Imams who advised MH about such matters on two individual message boards with domains domiciled in two different states it's not the date the divorce was declared, but the date she decided the Evil Momen might have found divorce an option in his heart.
Now that might not have been the answer MH would have received if she could have dragged her grieving self out of her car in the parking lot of her own Mosque, walked in, and had a face-to-face, honest, and open discussion with an Imam there, but this answer works for HER, so that's the way it's gonna be.
For your information, my information was in person not on net. I went to my local imam first and asked, then i went to a masjid in new hampshire while i was there and discussed the matter.. So before you open your mouth stating i found the info online, maybe you should ask me where i got the info
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal:
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: thanks newcomer
MH, paltalk or yahoo 'imams' dont count
whats paltalk and imams????? u know some women do enjoy the comforts of having a man around wethere it be for love money or companionship! who are we to tell her she cant do that!if it makes her happy i am happy for her!! as long as he is good to her he may just be the one for her!! but mystic dear i dont agree with somethings they say! dont spend no money on him!!let him be the giver!! let him come to u!!!
Trust me sweety, i have not spent nor will i spend one penny on him. He made a trip to see me and meet me in person, he paid everything including food and gas, he wanted me to meet with his brother and sister in law and several of his friends so that i was more comfortable in him saying he is how and who he is. He also put me through on a phone call to his mother and sister in indonesia. He paid my ticket there, paid the hotel which was not a hotel, it was a spa resort called wentworth by the sea, as well as took me to a few malls and insisted on buying things for me. Soooo no, i am not spending anything at all, he however has spent a small fortune. The next plan is for him to come back here memorial day weekend and meet with my children and their father. He has spoken with my mother and sister already, as well as my best friend in florida. And why the hurry? Not really a hurry, we are planning and discussing possible future plans, but for my part its financial support, for his, he wants a muslim wife and children. i have asked why he has chosen me over others that might not have children. He says that he has not met anyone that has the same gentle heart and caring that i do, that i am honest and open about everything while others try to hide things from the past. He is offering much more than i have asked for.
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
good for u mystic!!i hope yal will be happy!!!
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
He doesn't have a father anymore? For what reasons he went to the US, and how does he make a living?
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote: Trust me sweety, i have not spent nor will i spend one penny on him.
Yes, you will.
quote: He made a trip to see me and meet me in person, he paid everything including food and gas, he wanted me to meet with his brother and sister in law and several of his friends so that i was more comfortable in him saying he is how and who he is.
Which part of the states did he travel from? Jumping in your car and renting out a hotel room doesn't count.
quote: He also put me through on a phone call to his mother and sister in indonesia.
I should join Psychic friends hotline.
quote: He paid my ticket there, paid the hotel which was not a hotel, it was a spa resort called wentworth by the sea, as well as took me to a few malls and insisted on buying things for me.
investment.
quote: Soooo no, i am not spending anything at all, he however has spent a small fortune.
If you consider that a small fortune I hate to see how much savings you have in your bank account. However, considering how much you asked from Momen I'm not surprised.
quote: The next plan is for him to come back here memorial day weekend and meet with my children and their father.
So you've met him in person once and now you're going to ok him to meet your kids and ex husband and get them to 'OK' this guy? If I have a guess I would say he needs something from you, citizenship? MH never tells us the full story so I try to read between the lines...what is he, in the country illegally?
quote: He has spoken with my mother and sister already, as well as my best friend in florida.
And that tells us ... what?
quote: And why the hurry? Not really a hurry, we are planning and discussing possible future plans, but for my part its financial support, for his, he wants a muslim wife and children.
The ink isn't even dry on your last divorce and you're already parading him around your family and friends but...no it isn't a hurry. Right. He wants a muslim wife and children, the fact that he is choosing one who is so quick to jump into...whatever...after her last divorce and your history with men tells me he's taking what he can get. The fact that you have (how many?) kids and he's willing to support them without even really knowing you either says a lot.
Are you both totally off your rocker or what??
quote: i have asked why he has chosen me over others that might not have children. He says that he has not met anyone that has the same gentle heart and caring that i do, that i am honest and open about everything while others try to hide things from the past.
how long did he look, 4 hours? I'm sure that spoke right to your ego, someone telling you how great and nice and 'gentle' you are. Jeesh~
quote: He is offering much more than i have asked for. '
I don't doubt that but it doesn't mean it's worth it. I just think you haven't been accustomed to asking for much for yourself in the past. Now you're settling for...what the hell is this?
I need a bucket...and not popcorn! Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
Mystic, have you looked here for him yet? I'm not trying to be mean. It's the very LEAST a woman with children should do before bringing a completely strange man into their home. Personally, I'd recommend at least a year of getting to know him before letting him meet the kids. No, scratch that. I'd personally stay single until my kid was 18, although I know that's expecting too much from most folks. But please think this through with your head and your children's best interests at heart.
This is truly crazy. I'm not one to spoil your fun Mystic but what you are doing really is crazy. Its one thing to want male attention, but to bring a stranger into your kids lives as a prospective step dad is insane, after a month or so of the last one ending. What are you teaching your kids? can you tell me that? This is so rebound and I cant believe you cant see it, i'm beginning to think you must be lying about somethings and not as honest as you say you are.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: *passes bucket to smucky*
*settles down for next episode*
Ooopsssssssssssssss......xcuse me for being late for the round,Ayisha. *grabs bucket from Smucky and offers a chunk of her caramel-peanuts-popcorn bar* Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
*shares dark choc Toblerone from new shop in Luxor with sashyra*
*passes spliff with 'CHILL MAN' in glitter on side to Mrs*
ahem, sashy, that bucket you got from smucks wasnt a popcorn bucket you know Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.: This is so rebound and I cant believe you cant see it, i'm beginning to think you must be lying about somethings and not as honest as you say you are.
Please replace the word THINK with HOPE...
((keep the bucket, I'm having my coconut cream pie))
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I have met him in person twice, he flew to me from new hampshire for 3 days, then flew me to new hampshire to him for 4 days. He knows everything about my past and when what occured. His father died several years ago , his mother has asked that he send me to indonesia to her though for now i am refusing to travel, and he came to the US 8 years ago for college, he and his twin. He works in a factory 4 days a week and holds a second job as well. A small fortune, well, he managed to spend nearly what i make in a month for me to be there for 4 days and is currently insisting that i allow him to help me pay my bills and do some small repairs that my house needs but i am refusing any of that for now. He is certainly persistant on my allowing him to support me and my children, always asking if there is anything at all that any of us need. He was involved with a girl back home for several years, the intention was to return home and marry, however it was found that she was sleeping with men so they broke off last year, since then he has looked here in states for a wife but says that he hasnt found what he looked for until me. The ones he found were not covering and lied to him about things, didnt keep with prayers, had a problem in having his mother come visit if they married,he gave various examples of why he didnt choose them. He says that i am muslimah, covering, keeping with prayers and fasting, would be more than happy to have any of his family to our home, honest and loyal is enough for him, the fact that i am beautiful is a bonus(his perception, not mine). He understands that I am not long divorced of course but understands that there is no reason for me to hold on to the past and not move forward and that i am seeking financial stability. He is willing to move here with me and hold 2 jobs to support us and me not work at all, but i have told him that it is not my wish that he work 2 jobs, that i will continue to work and it is my wish that he only work in one place as i would feel guilty if he was working himself to death while i sat home. His friends spent alot of time with he and i together and told me that they see that he is happy and that he treats them very well so that they can only imagine how he will treat me if i become his wife. If i were saying this relation was about love, sure yeah, it would be crazy, but its not, its about coming together for financial purpose and his needs as well. Love relations havent worked out for me so now its time to try out the side of practicality relation and see if love perhaps comes later. Not much different than an arranged marriage. Just for the sake of you asking if i had checked that link for him, i just did, he is not there. As well as he has never been with a woman intimately so i have no worries there either
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
Empty the bucket quick you guys I need to be sick in it! I can't believe all this! Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
I need financial security too, is his twin married?? can you fix me up? Seems its pretty easy for me to divorce hubby and as he went away to work last saturday we can say thats one week of the waiting period over with. Can you ask quickly though as hes due back any minute Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: I need financial security too, is his twin married?? can you fix me up? Seems its pretty easy for me to divorce hubby and as he went away to work last saturday we can say thats one week of the waiting period over with. Can you ask quickly though as hes due back any minute
ROFL
I can't believe this MH story is a real one anymore. Who wants to get married to a guy you met TWICE?? Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
hey DG I didnt meet the twin yet but if hes rich and Muslim what the hell. I will go to Indonesia and meet the family and report back to MH, always fancied going there
Seems its pretty easy for me to divorce hubby and as he went away to work last saturday we can say thats one week of the waiting period over with. _________________________________________________
Ayisha i think i should take priority over you as i have been away from my habeeby for 9 days and i want financial security too! Please can i have the twin if he is single? Posted by cloudberry (Member # 11163) on :
So there is no love involved, does someone REALLY think then all marriages last Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
they aint gonna get married in 2 days come on guys!! y cant yal just be happy for her if thats what makes her happy??
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by Habeeby: Quote: ________________________________________________
originally posted by Ayisha:
Seems its pretty easy for me to divorce hubby and as he went away to work last saturday we can say thats one week of the waiting period over with. _________________________________________________
Ayisha i think i should take priority over you as i have been away from my habeeby for 9 days and i want financial security too! Please can i have the twin if he is single?
Sorry habeeby, hubby has arrived in Edfu and is getting a car from there, I have to act quickly. I will have the twin even if hes married Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
exactly tina, the marriage will not be immediately. There are still things to consider, i want to see how he interacts with my children, how he is when he is in my home area as last time i didnt allow him to my home, i kept him an hour away from home around my work area. I have seen how he interacts with one of his friends children, those children adore him and he was soo good with them. The babies were so excited to see him when we arrived and were constantly climbing on him and hugging him. If the marriage is to occur its still a few months off
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
thats good!!!
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Quote: _________________________________________________ originally posted by Ayisha:
Sorry habeeby, hubby has arrived in Edfu and is getting a car from there, I have to act quickly. I will have the twin even if hes married _________________________________________________
*Habeeby begins to pack furiously in the hope that she can out run Ayisha* Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Quote: _________________________________________________ originally posted by MS:
If the marriage is to occur its still a few months off _________________________________________________
'A few months' that's okay then i am sure that you will know everything about this man in a few months - that really sounds like the foundations for a life long marriage!!!
Are you totally mad???? Sorry guys i have to change the channel from this soap opera for a few minutes it is making my head all mussy!!!!
*Habeeby leaves and will hopefully return with a clear head*
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
*Distracts Smuckers and swipes the pie*
*Virtually urfi's the twin*
Back off, ladies! HE'S MINE!
*Smacks Smuckers hand away from the pie - unless she wants the task of emptying the bucket*
Posted by Yowza (Member # 14400) on :
*scratches head in disbelief*
Posted by davieschristopher (Member # 15225) on :
Hold on one minute, WHERE'S THE PIE? NO ONE TOLD ME THERE WAS PIE! I WASN'T INVITED? LOL Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: its about coming together for financial purpose
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
*Habeeby returns hoping that this was all a bad dream, reads the thread and begins to cry with frustration*
MS i am so frustrated that you are happy to become a brood mare for a price. Where is your self respect? How can you ever respect any man if you cannot respect yourself?
Justvisiting congratulations!!! you win the twin... You and MS are sisters now Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: exactly tina, the marriage will not be immediately. There are still things to consider, i want to see how he interacts with my children, how he is when he is in my home area as last time i didnt allow him to my home, i kept him an hour away from home around my work area. I have seen how he interacts with one of his friends children, those children adore him and he was soo good with them. The babies were so excited to see him when we arrived and were constantly climbing on him and hugging him. If the marriage is to occur its still a few months off
F'king unbelieveable, Mr Indonesia 2008. I'm lost for words, like Smuckers said I can only hope that this is all made up.
Sasyhra, Smuckers, Ayisha, a question to you, are we living on a different planet to these people?
Yes MH, take advice from Tina, she is definately the best person here to listen to, after all she is a wonderful role model for parenting and marriage advice.
Beautiful, nice, over momen, arranged marriage Mystic, enjoy your life.
Posted by Dawn-Bev* (Member # 15190) on :
totally lost for words!!!!!!!!
but I'll have some of that pie if there is any left Posted by Yowza (Member # 14400) on :
I like pie. Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: exactly tina, the marriage will not be immediately. There are still things to consider, i want to see how he interacts with my children, how he is when he is in my home area as last time i didnt allow him to my home, i kept him an hour away from home around my work area. I have seen how he interacts with one of his friends children, those children adore him and he was soo good with them. The babies were so excited to see him when we arrived and were constantly climbing on him and hugging him. If the marriage is to occur its still a few months off
F'king unbelieveable, Mr Indonesia 2008. I'm lost for words, like Smuckers said I can only hope that this is all made up.
Sasyhra, Smuckers, Ayisha, a question to you, are we living on a different planet to these people?
Yes MH, take advice from Tina, she is definately the best person here to listen to, after all she is a wonderful role model for parenting and marriage advice.
Beautiful, nice, over momen, arranged marriage Mystic, enjoy your life.
ahole mrs u dont know me!!! and im happy for her !! just cas u dont live like the rest of us doesnt make u any better then the rest of us!!!! yr a bad woman!!! we dont have to live the life u live mrs!!! we are all human we all have our own lives!!so what if its not the life u choose so freakin what!!! i would bet ur life isnt all that perfect when u come on here tellin people how bad they are!!!! u need to check yr own before u can bash someone elses!!!
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: exactly tina, the marriage will not be immediately. There are still things to consider, i want to see how he interacts with my children, how he is when he is in my home area as last time i didnt allow him to my home, i kept him an hour away from home around my work area. I have seen how he interacts with one of his friends children, those children adore him and he was soo good with them. The babies were so excited to see him when we arrived and were constantly climbing on him and hugging him. If the marriage is to occur its still a few months off
F'king unbelieveable, Mr Indonesia 2008. I'm lost for words, like Smuckers said I can only hope that this is all made up.
Sasyhra, Smuckers, Ayisha, a question to you, are we living on a different planet to these people?
Yes MH, take advice from Tina, she is definately the best person here to listen to, after all she is a wonderful role model for parenting and marriage advice.
Beautiful, nice, over momen, arranged marriage Mystic, enjoy your life.
You forgot Rumi Mrs. I don't want to be left here alone with "them" . Please, Please I beg you don't leave me, let me catch a ride with you back to reality! Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting: *Distracts Smuckers and swipes the pie*
*Virtually urfi's the twin*
Back off, ladies! HE'S MINE!
*Smacks Smuckers hand away from the pie - unless she wants the task of emptying the bucket*
Now THERE is a LADY I like!!!! Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
Does your new husband know that the only reason you want to be with him is for his money! I don't get this! If it's about money then he can get married to anyone since there is no feelings between both of you and as long as he will be paying!
This is so weird and complicated, there is something about this man!
Hmmmm....We can only wait and see! and of course wish you good luck.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: exactly tina, the marriage will not be immediately. There are still things to consider, i want to see how he interacts with my children, how he is when he is in my home area as last time i didnt allow him to my home, i kept him an hour away from home around my work area. I have seen how he interacts with one of his friends children, those children adore him and he was soo good with them. The babies were so excited to see him when we arrived and were constantly climbing on him and hugging him. If the marriage is to occur its still a few months off
lol ohhh Mystic, you still - you JUST don't get it. That is the worst thing of all, that you really don't get it at all. I'm beyond feeling sorry for you, I pity you and feel sorry for your children. Good luck with this new venture. My guess is you've participated in a pyramid scheme before. Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.:
Sasyhra, Smuckers, Ayisha, a question to you, are we living on a different planet to these people?
Sadly no, its the same one just a different 'space' Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Yowza: *scratches head in disbelief*
Are you calling me a liar?
Look, Yowza, I consulted with authorities higher than you will ever know: INeedPapersFixed366497^3, MyMotherLovesYouIPromise, and ReallyINeverMarried. They all told me urfi by posting it on a message board in front of complete strangers is, indeed, a legal and binding marriage. If it wasn't, I would have never dedicated my heart and soul (not to mention physical "prowess" *wink, wink*) to them for the duration of two days and one night each. I'm NOT that kind of girl.
Sorry, Dawn-Bev, DC ate the last of the pie.
*Martinis, anyone?*
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv:
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: exactly tina, the marriage will not be immediately. There are still things to consider, i want to see how he interacts with my children, how he is when he is in my home area as last time i didnt allow him to my home, i kept him an hour away from home around my work area. I have seen how he interacts with one of his friends children, those children adore him and he was soo good with them. The babies were so excited to see him when we arrived and were constantly climbing on him and hugging him. If the marriage is to occur its still a few months off
F'king unbelieveable, Mr Indonesia 2008. I'm lost for words, like Smuckers said I can only hope that this is all made up.
Sasyhra, Smuckers, Ayisha, a question to you, are we living on a different planet to these people?
Yes MH, take advice from Tina, she is definately the best person here to listen to, after all she is a wonderful role model for parenting and marriage advice.
Beautiful, nice, over momen, arranged marriage Mystic, enjoy your life.
You forgot Rumi Mrs. I don't want to be left here alone with "them" . Please, Please I beg you don't leave me, let me catch a ride with you back to reality!
((whisks all the non-crazies off to reality with pie))
Posted by Yowza (Member # 14400) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by Yowza: *scratches head in disbelief*
Are you calling me a liar?
Look, Yowza, I consulted with authorities higher than you will ever know: INeedPapersFixed366497^3, MyMotherLovesYouIPromise, and ReallyINeverMarried. They all told me urfi by posting it on a message board in front of complete strangers is, indeed, a legal and binding marriage. If it wasn't, I would have never dedicated my heart and soul (not to mention physical "prowess" *wink, wink*) to them for the duration of two days and one night each. I'm NOT that kind of girl.
Sorry, Dawn-Bev, DC ate the last of the pie.
*Martinis, anyone?*
More like *scratches head in disbelief* at the MH saga. Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv:
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: exactly tina, the marriage will not be immediately. There are still things to consider, i want to see how he interacts with my children, how he is when he is in my home area as last time i didnt allow him to my home, i kept him an hour away from home around my work area. I have seen how he interacts with one of his friends children, those children adore him and he was soo good with them. The babies were so excited to see him when we arrived and were constantly climbing on him and hugging him. If the marriage is to occur its still a few months off
F'king unbelieveable, Mr Indonesia 2008. I'm lost for words, like Smuckers said I can only hope that this is all made up.
Sasyhra, Smuckers, Ayisha, a question to you, are we living on a different planet to these people?
Yes MH, take advice from Tina, she is definately the best person here to listen to, after all she is a wonderful role model for parenting and marriage advice.
Beautiful, nice, over momen, arranged marriage Mystic, enjoy your life.
You forgot Rumi Mrs. I don't want to be left here alone with "them" . Please, Please I beg you don't leave me, let me catch a ride with you back to reality!
((whisks all the non-crazies off to reality with pie))
Rumi's Mood: Validated and Lovin Smucks for not leavin her behind . We have pie now lookin for Alchemist cake girl to bring on board. We need chocolate and lots of it!!
(( Rumi looking down and blowing big rasberries at the nut jobs who aren't taking the first sane flight out of MysticLand ))
Posted by cloudberry (Member # 11163) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: exactly tina, the marriage will not be immediately. There are still things to consider, i want to see how he interacts with my children, how he is when he is in my home area as last time i didnt allow him to my home, i kept him an hour away from home around my work area. I have seen how he interacts with one of his friends children, those children adore him and he was soo good with them. The babies were so excited to see him when we arrived and were constantly climbing on him and hugging him. If the marriage is to occur its still a few months off
lol ohhh Mystic, you still - you JUST don't get it. That is the worst thing of all, that you really don't get it at all. I'm beyond feeling sorry for you, I pity you and feel sorry for your children. Good luck with this new venture. My guess is you've participated in a pyramid scheme before.
Exactly. If you think of it, fine, if you decide to do this yourself. But there are kids, what kind of picture they will get about relationships after this. They will probably follow the same pattern.
Like I said, it's ALL about how you let other people treat you. If I would have people (men) treat me bad I guess I would be where you're now, dunno. I have a family member who bumps into these kind of men all the time, a man after man. Others saw some of them were seriously disturbed but she didn't Till this day and she's just not a happy person most of the time.
Even though your marriage takes place after months it doesn't mean that loveless marriage is working any better than one filled with love. It's not a quarantee he's gonna treat you RIGHT. In my eyes if you don't love/like someone there's greater risk of not caring about the other person. Just IMO.
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
Rumi, i'm sorry honey, love you, kiss kiss, I wouldn't leave you behind
Tina: You're right, I'm sorry, It's now evident to me that I have alot to learn from you and Mystic. My life is far too normal and uneventful for it to be right, I think I live in a fantasy world. I would like you to give me some advise about my life and how I should live it.
Please tell me what I should do...with all your knowledge and understanding of the world it would be selfish not to share it with me. Tell me should I divorce my husband and meet someone else tomorrow over the internet? We could have a relationship for 10 years without ever seeing each other or I could just move him in tomorrow, what would be best? Should I give up work and go on benefits? Or find a different man to pay my bills? Should I put all my children in care?
Oh please tell me Life Coach Tina, I want to change my life, I'm so lost and want to join the 'others'
Posted by Miss Sharm (Member # 12405) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: Does your new husband know that the only reason you want to be with him is for his money! I don't get this! If it's about money then he can get married to anyone since there is no feelings between both of you and as long as he will be paying!
Mystic......surely this is no better than actually prostituting yourself out to the guy....to be there for his needs. I believe there has to be some feeling there to share the most intimate expereince that you can with another human. As you have said before Mystic, it is your life and you will live it as you see fit....just makes sure that you are 100% happy with the situation and don't forget your children in all of this.
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.: Rumi, i'm sorry honey, love you, kiss kiss, I wouldn't leave you behind
Tina: You're right, I'm sorry, It's now evident to me that I have alot to learn from you and Mystic. My life is far too normal and uneventful for it to be right, I think I live in a fantasy world. I would like you to give me some advise about my life and how I should live it.
Please tell me what I should do...with all your knowledge and understanding of the world it would be selfish not to share it with me. Tell me should I divorce my husband and meet someone else tomorrow over the internet? We could have a relationship for 10 years without ever seeing each other or I could just move him in tomorrow, what would be best? Should I give up work and go on benefits? Or find a different man to pay my bills? Should I put all my children in care?
Oh please tell me Life Coach Tina, I want to change my life, I'm so lost and want to join the 'others'
i never said i wanted u to live the way others live!!!nor would i tell someone how to live their lives. what i am saying is if ya can't agree with someones life and the way they live it why do u wanna say its bad? maybe its bad for you but maybe not bad for them!!! how do yal know this man mystic has met will not be good for her in the long run?? noone can know!! only time will tell!!!
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: We need chocolate and lots of it!!
*Passes chocolate martini to Rumi*
*Flashes 60s peace sign to Yowza - it's all good*
So!
How 'bout them Yankees?
*Desperately trying to figure out how to break it to Mr. Wonderful he will be co-husbanding with some rich dude from Indonesia*
*Cops a peek at the pie Smuckers has behind her back*
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
Tina, In fairness to you, I should lay off you. I'm sorry, and I do mean that.
Seriously Tina, no one here wants to see Mystics life fall apart or her kids. Everyone here tries until they are blue in the face to get her to take things one step at a time. Its because we care that we say these things.
It would be easy to say, 'yeah good one, give him a try', but Mystic repeatedly makes the wrong decisions and that is so frustrating to sit by and watch. I'm beginning to think that she makes this stuff up because it really is unbelievable.
Why would anyone, less than 2 months after the love of their life relationship ended want to go and marry someone for some cash? Why? think about it Tina.
How lonely can one person be that they have to rush into something like this NOW. She hasnt been on her own for years and years, she has children too. This isn't about a grown woman just throwing herself at any Tom Dick and Harry, she has CHILDREN living with her that deserve more thought than they are getting. When people arrange marriages its when families know each other, not with complete strangers.
Even paedophiles/serial killers/abusive men, have a good side that they can show people if they want.
Come on Tina, look at the past 3 years of Mystics life revealed here on ES and tell me you think this is a good idea.
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
well i have been here 1 yr all i know about is momen! and sure he was a mistake i see that! but she also said she will take it slow with this man as well!! she isnt a bad woman and yes some women tend to attrack foul men!! as she explains so afr so good noone can tell if he will be bad or not! we must let her live her life and although everyones advice is goood!! only mystic and make her own choices!! she will be with him no matter what anyone says to her!so why can we not give her the congats that she needs? and everyone here knows alot of women marry for financial gain!!maybe one day they will love each other!he looks like a good man!! but noone knows him !! and i already told her its a bad idea to go to indonesia!!! she knows nothin of the country or the people!!! we can ask her to be cautious!! but will she?? we will see in time what really prvails!!!
Posted by davieschristopher (Member # 15225) on :
Well, if she was really here to get help, she wouldn't be posting sob stories all the time (no disrespect, but Mrs. HAS a point if she would listen, she would be better off). Than again, I haven't always listened either (mom can vouch for that one LOL), so I have no reason to post this, but I have to say something. I will keep my mouth quiet about this thread from now on!
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: If the marriage is to occur its still a few months off
If you don't want to take any of the advice we have given you up to now, and you think that you now are the expert on Islamic marriages, I would suggest that you take this piece of advice very seriously.
Instead of just interviewing for your second Muslim husband, I would suggest that you do a series of interviews and work out numbers three, four, and five. For one thing, it will save us having to have this conversation again when you realize that you have no idea how to function as a typical wife in a loveless arranged marriage, which is probably what will lead to the end of this one. And secondly, because the way you are heading is down the same road as so many other new Muslimahs have headed, all whipped up in the thrill of having a line of men they think they can choose from, most of whom move on when they realize that what they really wanted was a girl from back home who knew how to look after them like their mother did. And they do so leaving their new Muslimah wife behind with yet another child from yet another father, desperate to find yet another man to support their ever growing blended family.
You are not only playing with a religion that you know very little about yet, which is serious enough in itself, but you are also playing a game that you haven't spent a lifetime learning the rules of, like the women these men think they don't want. The only way you will survive this game is by listening to people who have more experience than you.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I have two pies, black current and coconut cream pie.
I fear that in 5, 10 or 15 years time MH is going to be over momen (which she clearly is NOT now) and she will regret this decision to marry a man she hardly knows. Of course, that's IF it lasts 5 years - the odds aren't good. Imagine in 10 years time she is well over Mr. M and realizes she doesn't need anyone to lean on for financial reasons much less give sex and children to easily in exchange for financial support. By then it is too late, and she is stuck in the mud, and wants love and romance and probably by then it will be too late. Of course by then she will be on an Indonesian message board and would hardly bother coming here.
I must agree with Newcomer (you are hardly a newcomer anymore are you? ), you seem to be getting yourself in a situation that you can't see very far down the road with. It seems you are taking bits and pieces of what you 'believe' and twisting them just enough to where they suit you and the other bits you leave to prove as a reminder that you are a 'covering muslimah who prays regularly'. Yippie, you cover and pray...not that I mean to trivialize that but comeon, do you really think that's all it's about? This guy is not on the level with you if he makes you think that's all her cares about, honestly. If you choose to believe that you are setting yourself up for failure and a lifetime of misery, not to mention what happens to your kids. We are not women who can enter into loveless marriages easily, as Western women we are almost indoctrinated to believe that unless the marriage brings us happiness it isn't worth being in. How long do you really think you can keep up the facade before Western Mysticheart comes out? Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
You are right DC, its almost showmanship, she doesn't want advice because she thinks she is right.
Tina, before Momen there were others, which is fine, its understandable people take a while to find the right one sometimes. Its not so much about the number of men. Its the drama involved. Perhaps if internet relationship no.1 didnt work out, MOST people would consider that a warning, but no, no.2 then no.3 (I believe, someone will correct me if I am wrong).
Everyone warned MH about Momen, that he wasn't the man she was making him out to be, not a settling down, religious, devoted husband...quite the opposite in fact. No she didnt listen, so how good a judge of character is she really?
It isn't safe to jump into relationships with people you meet on the net, of course there are some good ones, but so many are headcases, and its really hard to tell unless you spend alot of time with them - in person.
I'm not saying they are bad people AT ALL, but the speed at which things happen and the lack of planning, logic, forethought and care for her childrens emotions is scary, totally unhealthy.
And she will NOT take her time. She hasn't already, she is not a 'take you time' person, so mark my words in three months this complete stranger will probably be living with her and her kids. God only knows what the future could hold there.
so sad
We shouldn't roll a dice and keep our fingers crossed when it comes to our families, or our safety.
Posted by cloudberry (Member # 11163) on :
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal: but she also said she will take it slow with this man as well!!
Slow...? Slow would be that she would have been alone for a while after being badly hurt and divorced! Not even _thinking_ a man. I am sure you cannot find a one single shrink who thinks rushing into another relationship is healthy especially when you'are feeling obviously not well yet!!!!!
They say that when you are able to be alone (she's not alone anyway, she has children) then you're being capable of being in a relationship. How they call a person who always has to have someone beside them?
Posted by cloudberry (Member # 11163) on :
I also find it very disturbing that she is revealing half of her life here on internet. Not good at all Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
great post Newcomer and so right!
MH is a new Muslim with children. I dont know the ages and sexes of the children but these will be expected to live as Muslim children, without choice as their mother and step-father are Muslim. What if he decides to go back to live in Indonesia? What if he decides the girls need cutting? Does he actually have residence in USA or is he still there for study?
This is the first time she has been a 'single' Muslimah, she converted through Momen, it IS overwhelming all these men lining up to 'marry' you without meeting you or knowing you, just because you're a new Muslimah. This is one reason it is normally advised not to consider marriage for 2 years, to get to know the religion and YOUR place in it.
MH do you know anything about the culture of Indonesians?? I know its the largest population of Muslims in the world and Raihan are lovely singers, but the rest I have no idea.
I pray for your kids sake this IS a decent man and will treat you right and you will be back in 5 years saying how wonderful it all is and you both found love, but its more likely you will be back telling us you are in more shite than you could ever have imagined. Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Quote:
How they call a person who always has to have someone beside them?
needy cloudberry...
Posted by citizen (Member # 1344) on :
I think Mystic is in debt, that's the only logical explanation for marrying for money. Last year she was desperate for love, this year she is desperate for money.
Mystic, may I suggest, since you're 'interviewing' men for marriage that you choose one that doesn't want kids? Maybe he's already got grown kids or something. Then if things go wrong, only you get hurt and you'll be able to recover quickly and look for another new man.
If you have kids with this one, and something goes wrong, you'll be saddled for 18 years bringing them up. This will cause you more heartache and make it more difficult to find another man.
Since you're doing cold calculations here, think about and discuss with this man what will happen if the marriage fails.
Posted by cloudberry (Member # 11163) on :
quote:Originally posted by Habeeby: Quote:
How they call a person who always has to have someone beside them?
needy cloudberry...
Yes... I had to go and look for the word, I guess it is "codependancy", an addiction to relationships.
"Co-dependency is a learned behavior that can be passed down from one generation to another." Source: NMHA, National Mental Health Association
Posted by Yowza (Member # 14400) on :
I've been told more than once, that Indonesia is one of the most dangerous places to go. I'm not sure if it's true. I'd check it out though.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I think newcomer pretty much struck a chord when she said to interview a few...not one. If you are looking for a job that can have you living at the level finanically most comfortable for you, do you interview with one and grab it, or make several interviews and choose from your offers? Why grab up the first fish that bites because you got a nibble? That might just be a really hungry fish~ Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: and he came to the US 8 years ago for college, he and his twin. He works in a factory 4 days a week
What's his degree in, that he's working in a factory?
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<how great and nice>
Don`t forget this are the key magical words,Smuckers. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<says that he hasnt found what he looked for until me>
Good Lord...this line is soooooo tired i never imagined women were still impressed by it!!! Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: I need financial security too, is his twin married?? can you fix me up? Seems its pretty easy for me to divorce hubby and as he went away to work last saturday we can say thats one week of the waiting period over with. Can you ask quickly though as hes due back any minute
Move over,Ayisha.You have married twice already,while im still going to look for a second!
*raising hand higher looking for hard-solid financial stability*
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<Yes MH, take advice from Tina, she is definately the best person here to listen to, after all she is a wonderful role model for parenting and marriage advice.>
ROFL
Mrs.,don´t forget in the kingdom of the fake nicey-nice this persons are a commodity,very much looked after for "true" friendship. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Yowza: I've been told more than once, that Indonesia is one of the most dangerous places to go. I'm not sure if it's true. I'd check it out though.
Yeah,it is a danger zone at the moment.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Yes We Can:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: and he came to the US 8 years ago for college, he and his twin. He works in a factory 4 days a week
What's his degree in, that he's working in a factory?
I really have a concern that a factory worker is exactly a financially desirable man able to support a family consisting of 3 children and maybe some more to come.
...unless he´s the owner of the factory,of course.
Posted by Yowza (Member # 14400) on :
quote:Originally posted by Yes We Can:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: and he came to the US 8 years ago for college, he and his twin. He works in a factory 4 days a week
What's his degree in, that he's working in a factory?
Exactly! Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8:
quote:Originally posted by Yes We Can:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: and he came to the US 8 years ago for college, he and his twin. He works in a factory 4 days a week
What's his degree in, that he's working in a factory?
I really have a concern that a factory worker is exactly a financially desirable man able to support a family consisting of 3 children and maybe some more to come.
...unless he´s the owner of the factory,of course.
The market isn't exactly overcrowded, I'm afraid...
Posted by miffmiss (Member # 14978) on :
OMG i got bored of this post ages ago but how could i have missed this new stuff.
MH why oh why would you want to marry a guy you dont love just for money. I am a single mum too and i could never live in a loveless marriage or let my daughter live in a loveless house. It is just cruel on everyone involved. Financially i am screwed. I work stupid hours just to pay the bills and the more i work the more i pay out on childcare costs but i made the choice to leave because i wanted happiness over security and it was getting to the point that my daughter did not like me even hugging family memebers because she had never seen anyone get that close to me cos her dad sure didnt. You will really regret this one day. Sorry i do not mean to be so judgemental because that is not my normal style but this is a car crash waiting to happen and i dont want to see you with another 25 page thread about a broken heart again. Get over one emotional mountain before you even attempt the next one.
Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
Mystic, a factory worker?
One word.
NAFTA.
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
I'm sure someone already brought this up, so please pardon the redundance, as I have tried like hell to stay away from this thread and haven't been reading it and refuse to go back and read, what 24 or 25 pages?...but now, somehow, I have been defeated and must post...it's like a train wreck I can't keep my eyes off of...
Mystic, you began another thread entitled "just wondering what most would do" a few weeks ago...here is your first post from that thread:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I talk to alot of people online, mostly women, and one of my online friends decided to marry for convenience. Basically she is struggling financially on her own, pregnant with twins, ordered to stop working until after the birth of her babies which is late this year(father doesnt acknowledge their exsistance).. so faced with this she has decided to take an offer of marriage that involves the guy paying all her expenses during the pregnancy if she will marry him after the babies are born and give him what he wants sexually when ever he requests , and basically be a servant to him, cooking, cleaning, whatever. In return he provides financially. Does this seem wrong to anyone else? I know its kinda a necessity for her but it just seems like a form of prostitution only with a paper to say it legal.
so, i guess you have changed your mind now? or have just you accepted prostitution? i mean, by YOUR own definition you are pursuing a "form" of prostitution, no? if you have changed your mind, what brought you to that decision? what suddenly made you feel that it is OK, when just a few weeks ago, it wasn't?
OR...were you just testing the waters on the forum before you dropped your big bomb?
I'm curious, why do you come to a forum asking a bunch of strangers, many of whom make fun of you, for advice about such important life decisions?
I sincerely hope that you and your children are healthy and happy and I have no judgment of you or your decisions, I am just curious as to WHY???
My apologies if you have already answered these questions.
OM
Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I have met him in person twice, he flew to me from new hampshire for 3 days, then flew me to new hampshire to him for 4 days. He knows everything about my past and when what occured. His father died several years ago , his mother has asked that he send me to indonesia to her though for now i am refusing to travel, and he came to the US 8 years ago for college, he and his twin. He works in a factory 4 days a week and holds a second job as well. A small fortune, well, he managed to spend nearly what i make in a month for me to be there for 4 days and is currently insisting that i allow him to help me pay my bills and do some small repairs that my house needs but i am refusing any of that for now. He is certainly persistant on my allowing him to support me and my children, always asking if there is anything at all that any of us need. He was involved with a girl back home for several years, the intention was to return home and marry, however it was found that she was sleeping with men so they broke off last year, since then he has looked here in states for a wife but says that he hasnt found what he looked for until me. The ones he found were not covering and lied to him about things, didnt keep with prayers, had a problem in having his mother come visit if they married,he gave various examples of why he didnt choose them. He says that i am muslimah, covering, keeping with prayers and fasting, would be more than happy to have any of his family to our home, honest and loyal is enough for him, the fact that i am beautiful is a bonus(his perception, not mine). He understands that I am not long divorced of course but understands that there is no reason for me to hold on to the past and not move forward and that i am seeking financial stability. He is willing to move here with me and hold 2 jobs to support us and me not work at all, but i have told him that it is not my wish that he work 2 jobs, that i will continue to work and it is my wish that he only work in one place as i would feel guilty if he was working himself to death while i sat home. His friends spent alot of time with he and i together and told me that they see that he is happy and that he treats them very well so that they can only imagine how he will treat me if i become his wife. If i were saying this relation was about love, sure yeah, it would be crazy, but its not, its about coming together for financial purpose and his needs as well. Love relations havent worked out for me so now its time to try out the side of practicality relation and see if love perhaps comes later. Not much different than an arranged marriage. Just for the sake of you asking if i had checked that link for him, i just did, he is not there. As well as he has never been with a woman intimately so i have no worries there either
naaaah. don't do it. i'd stay away from the fobs if i were you, for now atleast. you don't seem to have a good track record with them.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Yes We Can: Mystic, a factory worker?
One word.
NAFTA.
What is that? Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by hibbah:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: not there. As well as he has never been with a woman intimately so i have no worries there either
naaaah. don't do it. i'd stay away from the fobs if i were you, for now atleast. you don't seem to have a good track record with them.
what are fobs??
Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal:
quote:Originally posted by hibbah:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: not there. As well as he has never been with a woman intimately so i have no worries there either
naaaah. don't do it. i'd stay away from the fobs if i were you, for now atleast. you don't seem to have a good track record with them.
what are fobs??
Fresh Off the Boat.
Recently arrived immigrants who lack ties to the host country, i.e. a study job, residency, family, friends, etc.
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
NAFTA stands for north american free trade agreement
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by hibbah:
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal:
quote:Originally posted by hibbah:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: not there. As well as he has never been with a woman intimately so i have no worries there either
naaaah. don't do it. i'd stay away from the fobs if i were you, for now atleast. you don't seem to have a good track record with them.
what are fobs??
Fresh Off the Boat.
Recently arrived immigrants who lack ties to the host country, i.e. a study job, residency, family, friends, etc.
thanks!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8: <says that he hasnt found what he looked for until me>
Good Lord...this line is soooooo tired i never imagined women were still impressed by it!!!
Of course, she gets to still feel like the sweet nice perfect gal while also feeding her ego into thinking he's been SEARCHING AND SEARCHING for 8 years in the states for a covering Muslimah who prays and fasts and she is the first he's come across. OHHH Mystic, I wish I were a used car saleswoman in your area, I could make loads of cash off of you. Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
Mystic, if this is about money, why not take out a home equity loan and pay off your debt? Or use some to put liquid savings aside?
Isn't your ex-husband living on your property? (If I'm confusing postings, I apologize). Increase his rent. Take on a border if you have an extra bedroom.
There are a variety of ways to help solve financial problems without relying on a man.
Posted by hesmydream (Member # 12617) on :
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal:
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: exactly tina, the marriage will not be immediately. There are still things to consider, i want to see how he interacts with my children, how he is when he is in my home area as last time i didnt allow him to my home, i kept him an hour away from home around my work area. I have seen how he interacts with one of his friends children, those children adore him and he was soo good with them. The babies were so excited to see him when we arrived and were constantly climbing on him and hugging him. If the marriage is to occur its still a few months off
F'king unbelieveable, Mr Indonesia 2008. I'm lost for words, like Smuckers said I can only hope that this is all made up.
Sasyhra, Smuckers, Ayisha, a question to you, are we living on a different planet to these people?
Yes MH, take advice from Tina, she is definately the best person here to listen to, after all she is a wonderful role model for parenting and marriage advice.
Beautiful, nice, over momen, arranged marriage Mystic, enjoy your life.
ahole mrs u dont know me!!! and im happy for her !! just cas u dont live like the rest of us doesnt make u any better then the rest of us!!!! yr a bad woman!!! we dont have to live the life u live mrs!!! we are all human we all have our own lives!!so what if its not the life u choose so freakin what!!! i would bet ur life isnt all that perfect when u come on here tellin people how bad they are!!!! u need to check yr own before u can bash someone elses!!!
Wow, Tina, you said some things I agree with. We do have some self-righteous, pious and cruel queens around here.
I can't say I agree with or disagree with MH, but I do know she's doing this out of hurt.
But I like her, and I hope she makes the right deciosion for herself. Whatever that decision may be. Ultimately, she will do as she pleases.
She already knows all the negatives without being cruelly reminded of them. She also has some reasons for doing this that are "good" in her eyes.
Whatever her decision, right or wrong, I will be her friend because I believe she's a good person.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Didn't this same thing happen about this time last year? Everyone warning her, and seeing what she couldn't (wouldn't?) see? Then in February she was back with the 'yes you were right' sob story and now once again she can't see the forest for the trees (or the wood for the trees whatever...).
MH how many times are you going to trust your own judgment? Can you not see by now it SUCKS in a horrible way? If I were you I would sign over a power of attorney for everything I owned and allow SOMEONE (anyone!) to handle every affair of my life. You need to be saved from yourself~
Posted by Dawn-Bev* (Member # 15190) on :
what about the children ????????
have you not stopped to think for a minute and consider their emotional wellbeing?
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dawn-Bev*: what about the children ????????
have you not stopped to think for a minute and consider their emotional wellbeing?
Oh please, allow me to answer for her...ummmmm no.
Posted by hesmydream (Member # 12617) on :
I could be wrong. But she may think of this as being good for her children.
A stable, supportive man in their lives, and their mother traveling a lot less without them.
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by hesmydream:
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal:
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: exactly tina, the marriage will not be immediately. There are still things to consider, i want to see how he interacts with my children, how he is when he is in my home area as last time i didnt allow him to my home, i kept him an hour away from home around my work area. I have seen how he interacts with one of his friends children, those children adore him and he was soo good with them. The babies were so excited to see him when we arrived and were constantly climbing on him and hugging him. If the marriage is to occur its still a few months off
F'king unbelieveable, Mr Indonesia 2008. I'm lost for words, like Smuckers said I can only hope that this is all made up.
Sasyhra, Smuckers, Ayisha, a question to you, are we living on a different planet to these people?
Yes MH, take advice from Tina, she is definately the best person here to listen to, after all she is a wonderful role model for parenting and marriage advice.
Beautiful, nice, over momen, arranged marriage Mystic, enjoy your life.
ahole mrs u dont know me!!! and im happy for her !! just cas u dont live like the rest of us doesnt make u any better then the rest of us!!!! yr a bad woman!!! we dont have to live the life u live mrs!!! we are all human we all have our own lives!!so what if its not the life u choose so freakin what!!! i would bet ur life isnt all that perfect when u come on here tellin people how bad they are!!!! u need to check yr own before u can bash someone elses!!!
Wow, Tina, you said some things I agree with. We do have some self-righteous, pious and cruel queens around here.
I can't say I agree with or disagree with MH, but I do know she's doing this out of hurt.
But I like her, and I hope she makes the right deciosion for herself. Whatever that decision may be. Ultimately, she will do as she pleases.
She already knows all the negatives without being cruelly reminded of them. She also has some reasons for doing this that are "good" in her eyes.
Whatever her decision, right or wrong, I will be her friend because I believe she's a good person.
REGARDLESS OF WHAT THE OUTCOME MAY be if and when is does or doesnt work out i will still like her the same and be here for her as well!! just some people need to make their own mistakes in life inorder to go forward and say wow i really screwed up!!! then maybe they will realize what assholes they married and either be alone or find a better man! like chris is did not come home tonught! hes out with a girl!! i dont like that cas he keeps makin this stupid mistake by sleepin with every jane and mary out there!! but i will not hate him cas i love my son!! all i can do is tell him hey i dont like it. but he must make his own mistakes!! hell at least this one is his age but regardelss i do not like it! he cant take care of himself he doesnt need to be with no girl or woman!!!same with mystic! she should wait a while to know him better and never go to indonesia! but she is my friend and i will stand by her decision!! right or wrong!! and sorry for callin ya an ahole!!!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Tina you are right, her mistakes are hers to make. The thing that erks most people here is that she is involving children...which is why some of us are giving her advice (for the 10th time), some are trying to jolt her into reality by harsh words, some merely sitting back in awe at the incredible irresponsibility a mother of (three??) and a woman in her mid 30's possesses. If she wants to keep messing up her own life that IS her business, but in my opinion when you carelessly drag children along with you it crosses the line. MH why don't you sign custody over to your ex husband if you're going to continue this way? You once said you put them first in everything, but most people here have yet to see that. Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
i completly understand that!! didnt she also say he isnt around her kids yet?? if im mistakin sorry but i think thats what she said?
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by Yes We Can: Take on a border if you have an extra bedroom.
Taking in a boarder is a dangerous advice in this case IMO. Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dawn-Bev*: what about the children ????????
have you not stopped to think for a minute and consider their emotional wellbeing?
The children can go into two directions: the same as mummy did, because this is considered as normal, or, becoming extremely cautius against anything what has to do with relationships and marriages, because this always seems to go wrong. I'll guess that the holiday trip to Egypt will be exchanged to Indonesia (because I cannot imagine that the newcomer would like a visit to Egypt with this story in the past) Also great, Indonesia has a great culture and history. One advantage: the children will become informed about all kind of cultures, around the whole world. Maybe next stop on the trip will be a Carribean island, or Tibet, Russia or whatever kind of nation where desperate man are selling themselves to Western women. New game for the children: My mummy goes on a trip and she takes with her: An Egyptian gigolo. Next: My mummy goes for a holiday and she takes with her: An Egyptian gigolo An Indonesian factory-worker My mummy goes on a trip and what shall she bring us this time???? Exciting... Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
Wow some of this is really bitchy,
why do you all invest so much time in someone who will do exactly what she decides no matter what you say.
She's not listening guys, she never does, it's her life and her family and her choice how she lives it.
Is 24 pages and ES record??????????
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
No, not quite. We keep trying in the hopes that a light will go off in her head and save her children heartache she is sure to cause them. I think children are worth that...but to be honest I don't hold out much hope with her track record.
Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
quote:Originally posted by desertgirl:
quote:Originally posted by Yes We Can: Take on a border if you have an extra bedroom.
Taking in a boarder is a dangerous advice in this case IMO.
For the boarder? J/K
I was thinking someone like a college student. It's done around here pretty regularly and I've never heard of any problems.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Is there much difference between a boarder and a man you don't know being around your kids? Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Is there much difference between a boarder and a man you don't know being around your kids?
Female boarder?
OK, everyone thinks this is weird.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Anyone, you still don't know them. Would you leave your son around a woman you didn't know? I hear of many females who end up being pedophiles. I wouldn't want anyone around my child that I didn't know well, but in my opinion this goes back to the same 'I hardly know him and want him to support us finanically' deal MH has with this new mealticket. She doesn't know him, he doesn't know her. He could be psycho...even if she doesn't find any record on him. Knowing someone for a couple of months and only meeting him twice is fine if it's JUST YOU but to bring him around your children and move him into their home is just....creepy. Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Anyone, you still don't know them. Would you leave your son around a woman you didn't know? I hear of many females who end up being pedophiles. I wouldn't want anyone around my child that I didn't know well, but in my opinion this goes back to the same 'I hardly know him and want him to support us finanically' deal MH has with this new mealticket. She doesn't know him, he doesn't know her. He could be psycho...even if she doesn't find any record on him. Knowing someone for a couple of months and only meeting him twice is fine if it's JUST YOU but to bring him around your children and move him into their home is just....creepy.
I understand what you're saying. I guess I'm just used to it around here -- the locals (Annapolis) take in Naval Academy boarders all the time during the summer and other breaks. And my brother, for example, rented out a basement apartment (separate entrance).
OK....let's go back to that home equity loan. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
LOL She might be tapped out and can't get a loan. Usually a sane person depletes all of their options before getting desperate. Marrying for cash is pretty desperate if you ask me. My guess is she is in debt, has horrible credit, couldn't get arrested and probably lives off credit cards and pays only the minimum balance monthly. Imagine marrying into that? Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
*thinking seriously here to sign up tina kamal as her counselor/life-coach/role-model to follow*
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by ?????:
quote:Originally posted by Dawn-Bev*: what about the children ????????
have you not stopped to think for a minute and consider their emotional wellbeing?
The children can go into two directions: the same as mummy did, because this is considered as normal, or, becoming extremely cautius against anything what has to do with relationships and marriages, because this always seems to go wrong. I'll guess that the holiday trip to Egypt will be exchanged to Indonesia (because I cannot imagine that the newcomer would like a visit to Egypt with this story in the past) Also great, Indonesia has a great culture and history. One advantage: the children will become informed about all kind of cultures, around the whole world. Maybe next stop on the trip will be a Carribean island, or Tibet, Russia or whatever kind of nation where desperate man are selling themselves to Western women. New game for the children: My mummy goes on a trip and she takes with her: An Egyptian gigolo. Next: My mummy goes for a holiday and she takes with her: An Egyptian gigolo An Indonesian factory-worker My mummy goes on a trip and what shall she bring us this time???? Exciting...
Posted by Miss Sharm (Member # 12405) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: No, not quite. We keep trying in the hopes that a light will go off in her head and save her children heartache she is sure to cause them. I think children are worth that...but to be honest I don't hold out much hope with her track record.
Even if you do not want to listen to the advice and concerns that are being given to you Mystic then that is uour choice but don't say we didn't warn you. It also might make some others who are contemplating a simialr situation to stop and think. So even though you might be about to jump into the fire Mystic you might have saved some others from getting burnt!
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Miss Sharm:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: No, not quite. We keep trying in the hopes that a light will go off in her head and save her children heartache she is sure to cause them. I think children are worth that...but to be honest I don't hold out much hope with her track record.
Even if you do not want to listen to the advice and concerns that are being given to you Mystic then that is uour choice but don't say we didn't warn you. It also might make some others who are contemplating a simialr situation to stop and think. So even though you might be about to jump into the fire Mystic you might have saved some others from getting burnt!
She should jump alone and put her children for adoption/foster home.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I would be interested to know what ADVOCATE, a social worker with children's services would say about Mystics situation. Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
Here's another little hole in the fantasy scenario. Two of her three children are teenagers. Do they have her personality to the extend they're following their delusional mother sheep-like in her new found religion?
Or, are they typical teenagers, with half a brain cell and all the hormones that come with that difficult age and are rebelling like crazy against this newfound religion and the even more extreme lifestyle change their mother is imposing upon the household?
If mystic was truly honest with her internet suitors, WHAT IDIOT would find her an ideal marriage prospect? She may be practicing islam, but what about the two growing almost-adults that are ,her children?
See, I think in her little world, she's only "saddled" with the youngest, and the two oldest are probably to make their way in the world as soon as they hit 18. Not that any of us blame them for trying to get out.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: Does your new husband know that the only reason you want to be with him is for his money! I don't get this! If it's about money then he can get married to anyone since there is no feelings between both of you and as long as he will be paying!
This is so weird and complicated, there is something about this man!
Hmmmm....We can only wait and see! and of course wish you good luck.
he is well aware that my purpose for marrying is financial support and i am aware of his reasons as well, he provides for our needs financially, i provide to him children and a wife to be there for him when he comes home as well as sharing religion between us, anything he needs. All i ask of him is the financial support and to be treated respectfully and my children as his own.
Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart:
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: Does your new husband know that the only reason you want to be with him is for his money! I don't get this! If it's about money then he can get married to anyone since there is no feelings between both of you and as long as he will be paying!
This is so weird and complicated, there is something about this man!
Hmmmm....We can only wait and see! and of course wish you good luck.
he is well aware that my purpose for marrying is financial support and i am aware of his reasons as well, he provides for our needs financially, i provide to him children and a wife to be there for him when he comes home as well as sharing religion between us, anything he needs. All i ask of him is the financial support and to be treated respectfully and my children as his own.
You really are one of the most manipulative personalities I've ever encountered. Even the way you keep people in this thread going, myself included ...unbelievable. You just keep people one step away from giving up on you, to keep them thinking they're something they can do to help you, to snap you out of it. You answer with JUUUUUUST enough reserve to give posters here hope enough to help you see the light.
And play us all.
Bravo. You are anything but honest and nice.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
He is not fresh off the boat as one said, he has been in the usa for 8 years people. Indonesia is not that dangerous, lots of people travel to Bali, and i am honest, i havent hidden anything from him, i have been very upfront in this
and advice given to me by someone that is very religious.... marriage is a religious commitment laws are within islam and the next time someone try to tell you different you remind them of this it is not good for muslim women to be single if they read Qu'ran, they would know this provision for marriage in surah Al-Nissa and Al-Baqurah and other places so, when they say you are wrong tell them show me the haram if you can not then be gone with it
(you know, no i cant say that i am in love but i do see this man will provide for us and be good to us)
its ok you do not have to love him but you must RESPECT him that is wha is required for women love can come later but respect must be you dont have to love him, you do know this right? as long as you are compatable he is a provider good mulsim good man he will be good husband, insha Allah as you are faithful muslima faithful wife insha Allah, all will be fine his job is to love, and provide for you your job, it to respect and support him
Posted by Dalia* (Member # 10593) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: it is not good for muslim women to be single if they read Qu'ran, they would know this
BS!!!
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: but you must RESPECT him that is wha is required for women love can come later but respect must be you dont have to love him, you do know this right? as long as you are compatable he is a provider good mulsim good man he will be good husband, insha Allah as you are faithful muslima faithful wife insha Allah, all will be fine his job is to love, and provide for you your job, it to respect and support him
Sorry, but I believe you've read too many crappy pamphlets on the *ideal Muslima* and the *perfect Muslim wife* etc.
Your description above makes me want to puke. So sleeping with a man you don't feel the slightest bit of spark or excitement for makes you a faithful Muslima and a good wife? Sorry, I believe it makes you a prostitute, and I can't get my head around why any woman who is not forced to do such a thing would voluntarily share her life, her bed and her body with some dude just because he is dishing out the money.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dalia*:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: it is not good for muslim women to be single if they read Qu'ran, they would know this
BS!!!
It`s not good for Muslim or any religion woman to go jumping from one totally stranger man into another just for the sake of saying she`s "married". Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Indonesia is not that dangerous, lots of people travel to Bali, and i am honest, i havent hidden anything from him, i have been very upfront in this
lots of people travel to Bali but not all come back as they were bombed, dont you remember the Bali bombings?
Its good you didnt hide anything from him and you have been up front with him, it gives him just the right ammunition to be able to do exactly the same to you as your last 'muslim' man did and he knows you will accept it.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
If i had accepted it i wouldnt be divorced, i stood up for myself and demanded things stop, that is why i got divorced. And any place has bombings, egypt, jordan, lebanon, usa,, the list goes on, our lives are in Allah's hands, if he wills our lives are over , our lives will end no matter where we are.
Posted by citizen (Member # 1344) on :
the facts: 8 years in the US hasn't found a wife there or in Indonesia in all that time college for 8 years, no degree, now works in a factory how great a provider can he possibly be? are factory wages that generous in the US? check out someone richer if you want a good provider
don't have more children, mystic, you pay little enough attention to the ones you've got.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: He is not fresh off the boat as one said, he has been in the usa for 8 years people.
but you have not answered the question 'does he have residency?' He came for collage 8 years ago and now works in a factory and is willing to take another job? This guy is not legal in USA is he?? he needs a wife to make him legal.
quote:
and advice given to me by someone that is very religious.... marriage is a religious commitment laws are within islam and the next time someone try to tell you different you remind them of this it is not good for muslim women to be single if they read Qu'ran, they would know this provision for marriage in surah Al-Nissa and Al-Baqurah and other places so, when they say you are wrong tell them show me the haram if you can not then be gone with it
show me in one place it says it is not good for a muslimah to be single, just one place in Quran. Neither you not your 'very religious' friend can.
quote: (you know, no i cant say that i am in love but i do see this man will provide for us and be good to us)
its ok you do not have to love him but you must RESPECT him that is wha is required for women love can come later but respect must be you dont have to love him, you do know this right? as long as you are compatable he is a provider good mulsim good man he will be good husband, insha Allah as you are faithful muslima faithful wife insha Allah, all will be fine his job is to love, and provide for you your job, it to respect and support him
so HIS job is to LOVE you but your job isnt? Does he LOVE you Mystic or are you hoping that too will come later?
Good Muslim man does NOT always equal good Muslim husband!!!! Open your eyes and look around you.
you are playing a dangerous game mystic, with people and with the religion. Beware, you will pay for it.
Posted by Rashaa (Member # 15206) on :
Some people thrive and need to be in relationships for the sake of being in them - that is how they identify themselves....maybe the real reason (more likely) is that they cannot stand their own selves .....
An excellent book for the co-dependents on this site: "Women who love too much, and the men who love them". The author escapes me, but I can dig in my Psych books for it, if anyone is interested.
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
*Taking a few deep breaths*
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: He is not fresh off the boat as one said, he has been in the usa for 8 years people.
Really? Then it's safe to assume he doesn't need marriage to get a Green Card and, of course, you've seen the Green Card with your own two eyes? Or has he already taken the path to citizenship?
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: Indonesia is not that dangerous, lots of people travel to Bali
Really?
quote:Due to the possibility of terrorist attacks directed against American or other Western citizens and interests, the Department of State urges American citizens to evaluate carefully the risks of travel to Indonesia. The October 1, 2005, terrorist attacks in Bali, in which suicide bombers killed 20 people and injured more than 100, are a reminder that terrorists remain active in Indonesia. Similarly, during the three prior years, there were three significant terrorist attacks in Indonesia, two in Jakarta and one in Bali. During 2007, the Indonesian police and security forces disrupted a number of cells linked with Jemaah Islamiyah, a U.S. Department of State-designated foreign terrorist organization. The existence of additional cells intending to carry out future attacks in Bali, Jakarta, or other areas of Indonesia cannot be ruled out.
Terrorist attacks in Indonesia could occur at any time and could be directed against any location, including those frequented by foreigners, as well as identifiably American or other Western facilities or businesses in Indonesia. Such targets could include but are not limited to places where Americans and other Westerners live, congregate, work, study, shop, or visit, including hotels, clubs, restaurants, shopping centers, identifiably Western businesses, housing compounds, transportation systems, places of worship, schools, or public recreation events. While past terrorist attacks have involved the use of vehicle-borne explosives or suicide bombers carrying explosives in backpacks, terrorists may use other forms of attack in the future. Terrorists may target individual American citizen residents, visitors, students, or tourists, and tactics could include but are not limited to kidnapping, shooting, or poisoning.
The Department of State urges Americans in Indonesia to avoid crowds, maintain a low profile, and be vigilant about security at all times. Americans are advised to monitor local news broadcasts, vary their routes and times in carrying out daily activities, and consider the level of preventive security when visiting public places in Indonesia. Americans who choose to vacation in Indonesia despite the security risks are advised to consider the level of preventive security when choosing hotels, restaurants, beaches, entertainment venues, and recreation sites.
Oh, the horror. It just sickens me when the American government tries to scare people for no good reason.
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: and advice given to me by someone that is very religious.... marriage is a religious commitment laws are within islam and the next time someone try to tell you different you remind them of this it is not good for muslim women to be single if they read Qu'ran, they would know this provision for marriage in surah Al-Nissa and Al-Baqurah and other places so, when they say you are wrong tell them show me the haram if you can not then be gone with it
(you know, no i cant say that i am in love but i do see this man will provide for us and be good to us)
its ok you do not have to love him but you must RESPECT him that is wha is required for women love can come later but respect must be you dont have to love him, you do know this right? as long as you are compatable he is a provider good mulsim good man he will be good husband, insha Allah as you are faithful muslima faithful wife insha Allah, all will be fine his job is to love, and provide for you your job, it to respect and support him
MH, this isn't, ah, a copy and paste from a message board, is it? Just checkin'.
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart:
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: Does your new husband know that the only reason you want to be with him is for his money! I don't get this! If it's about money then he can get married to anyone since there is no feelings between both of you and as long as he will be paying!
This is so weird and complicated, there is something about this man!
Hmmmm....We can only wait and see! and of course wish you good luck.
he is well aware that my purpose for marrying is financial support and i am aware of his reasons as well, he provides for our needs financially, i provide to him children and a wife to be there for him when he comes home as well as sharing religion between us, anything he needs. All i ask of him is the financial support and to be treated respectfully and my children as his own.
You really are one of the most manipulative personalities I've ever encountered. Even the way you keep people in this thread going, myself included ...unbelievable. You just keep people one step away from giving up on you, to keep them thinking they're something they can do to help you, to snap you out of it. You answer with JUUUUUUST enough reserve to give posters here hope enough to help you see the light.
And play us all.
Bravo. You are anything but honest and nice.
I agree 100%
and Hesmydream, you might call us judgemental but its people like you, that DONT tell her how ridiculous it all is that are responsible for the damage these things will do to her kids, and her. I would rather be judgemental and stand up for what I think is right than go around agreeing with everyone because its 'her life', of course its 'her life', but if she's on here then I WILL have an opinion on it, like it or not. At least I'm trying to do something about it, rather than condone stupid self destructive decisions.
Posted by Yes We Can (Member # 6244) on :
quote:Originally posted by citizen: how great a provider can he possibly be? are factory wages that generous in the US?
No. That's what I was trying to say about NAFTA. The days of manufacturing jobs with good wages are over in the U.S., at least for the foreseeable future.
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rashaa: Some people thrive and need to be in relationships for the sake of being in them - that is how they identify themselves....maybe the real reason (more likely) is that they cannot stand their own selves .....
An excellent book for the co-dependents on this site: "Women who love too much, and the men who love them". The author escapes me, but I can dig in my Psych books for it, if anyone is interested.
It is a good book, I agree here is a link, for what its worth:
I don't agree with what MH is doing but there is a lot being said to her on this thread that I question too, and frankly some of which I find blatantly rude.
This thread began as a Momen bashing thread. When I said something in his defense there was no agreement. Then everyone decided to judge and condemn MH venomously, even to the point of saying she is a bad mother.
Every single person takes a risk when entering a relationship and I doubt seriously that there is anyone who doesn't have some criteria for who they want to be with. Even saying that you want someone of your own religion is a criteria. Personally, I look for a man who has integrity, is educated, and has gentle spirit. What I want to feel is love, chemistry, and passion.
What I want to know is how long and how thoroughly everyone knew their spouse before marriage? You can't possibly know everything about them until after marriage. I mean we can try our best, but really how do you know everything?
Mystic is looking for financial security from a Muslim man. I don't think that is so bad as long is she is honest with the person.
What I do question about your choice MH is the fact that you said he holds two jobs and one of them is in a factory. I know everyone's idea of financial security is different but do you honestly believe that a man who works in a factory and has to hold down two jobs is financially secure? Now if you would of said that he has a Masters degree and works for an oil company, then I would believe that he is financially secure.
Another thing that concerns me is this need to be in a relationship. Everyone has issues, but don't you think it would be a good idea to step back and heal yourself a bit before bringing another on board? This is the rest of your life we are talking about. Unless, of course you have in your mind that what you really want is to divorce someone who is financially secure. In that case a women needs to be pretty ruthless to make it pan out in her favor.
If this is the right man, he will wait for you. I guarantee it. Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
Of_Gold, I appreciate that you probably think we are being mean to MH, but it is because we think that, from what she has said over the past 3 years she is not the sort of person that could just have a 'financial arrangement', there is a lot more to it than 25 pages, and people piece things together. I can speak for myself only when I say that I am not basing what I am saying on MH's relationship with Momen alone, there are so many pieces to the puzzle.
Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: What I want to know is how long and how thoroughly everyone knew their spouse before marriage?
You realy want to know? ok, I met my husby when we were 17 and 18, we married when we were 24-25, so SEVEN years. (btw, still married, I think we know each other thoroughly by now)
ok, maybe that's a very long period but there's a lot of difference with someone who decides to marry a guy after meeting TWICE. What is even more unbelievable to me in this whole story is the fact MH wants to marry a guy she does not really love. The vital ingredient of any marriage should be LOVE, right??
Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
MH will have to lose everything she holds dear to her to realise what she is doing is harming both her children and herself, imo
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
Well, yes, Mrs. I feel sorry for her. There are some very hurtful things said to her here.
Your right, I don't know the 3 year saga, so I am in the dark about that. I also don't know how she is with her children so maybe something was said in the past that makes people feel she is not a good mother.
I admit, it appears that she is making bad judgment calls. But many here are married to Egyptian men so there is a good possibility that they traveled to Egypt to meet them. What makes their situation more logical?
I could be wrong and she needs this belittling for a wake up call. Who knows? It just seems like she is taking a virtual beating from the whole community.
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by desertgirl:
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: What I want to know is how long and how thoroughly everyone knew their spouse before marriage?
You realy want to know? ok, I met my husby when we were 17 and 18, we married when we were 24-25, so SEVEN years. (btw, still married, I think we know each other thoroughly by now)
ok, maybe that's a very long period but there's a lot of difference with someone who decides to marry a guy after meeting TWICE. What is even more unbelievable to me in this whole story is the fact MH wants to marry a guy she does not really love. The vital ingredient of any marriage should be LOVE, right??
Thats wonderful desertgirl. We should all be so lucky.
For me Love is the vital ingredient, so I of course think it should be. But I know for a fact that not everyone feels the same or has the same reason for marrage. Who is to tell another adult why they should marry?
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: Well, yes, Mrs. I feel sorry for her. There are some very hurtful things said to her here.
Your right, I don't know the 3 year saga, so I am in the dark about that. I also don't know how she is with her children so maybe something was said in the past that makes people feel she is not a good mother.
I admit, it appears that she is making bad judgment calls. But many here are married to Egyptian men so there is a good possibility that they traveled to Egypt to meet them. What makes their situation more logical?
I could be wrong and she needs this belittling for a wake up call. Who knows? It just seems like she is taking a virtual beating from the whole community.
I think its different because this isn't the first, or the second, or maybe not even the third time. People judge the 'not being a good mother' on the fact that she doesn't seem to consider her children in any of these decisions, its one thing to put yourself at risk, but people will conclude that putting your children at risk makes you a bad mother.
If children have grown over the past year to accept that Momen will be moving in and being their step dad, is it fair to then say, 'no, hang on, thats ended, i'm finding a new husband'within just a month and on the internet of all places? What message is it sending her children? particularly the girls.
I know she's hurting, and I know she's searching, people are just so desperate to get her to see that.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
Of_gold, I too can understand your concern for some of the replies in this thread BUT the story of MH IS much longer than these 25 pages. There was one guy, then another, while still holding onto the other one. One is STILL there in the background.....the one friend who knows her so well?......there was also ex hubby in the drive (am i on the right woman here?) in a mobile home or something. Then along comes the infamous Momen!! Everyone KNEW Momen from some of his past 'relationships', his chats, his website, etc, and warned her, but NOOO Momen had met Mystic and became a reformed character possibly due to meeting the 'nice, loyal, honest' Mystic. Mystic then 'converted' to Islam and went off and married him. All was apparently rosey until this thread. This is in the space of one year that I know of!!!! Now she is on another one while still not being over Momen properly and the 'good friend who knows her so well' still hanging around, and possibly the ex husband in the drive!
Exptincai got it spot on in her reply in page 24 ( i think it was exptincai) when she said MH leaves it till the last dregs are squeezed and gives us a teeny weeny bit more to chew on. They weren't her exact words but thats what she was saying.
Its like MH LIKES all this attention and advice and pops back in time to drop another clanger in the works and with the 'Islamic' stuff too.....well im sorry to say this but it all seems so 'false'. I 'partly' understand how she is as she is a new Muslim (inshaAllah) and you can get a bit swept away in all these leaflets and books about the perfect Muslim man, the perfect Muslim wife blah blah, you think 'wow, an ideal man is what I will get if I marry a Muslim' but it really isnt like that in the real world!!!! SHE is acting like it is, if she really thinks it will be like that then she really is delusional.
I hope and pray for Mystic that SHE can be the ideal perfect muslim wife like she thinks she is and the same for this guy too.
Im sure I speak for many here who have been having a go at Mystic on this thread,I wish her the very very best and hope to God he IS a decent guy that she will learn to love in time, but knowing Mystic from here that is highly unlikely and there will be a new drama. She does not know how to love HERSELF and until she does then no one else can make her happy. The happiness and peace and love she so desperately craves is inside her, not in some man, its in HER but she hasnt found it yet OR she has and its shining like a beacon lighting up her halo making her really this 'nice' blah blah woman she is trying to be. I really dont know anything anymore and I really wish I had a drink Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
I see. That puts a little light on the situation. Sounds like everyone is at their wits end with being patient with her then.
I just saw everyone taking shots and felt that she needed someone in her corner. I will keep quiet now.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Of_Gold. When MH entered her relationship with Momen, she already had a rather disasterous past. IMO that past is one of the reasons why she married that man, and it turns out disasterous again. That wasn't a surprise, everybody could have predicted that. The combination of factors made it disasterous, and right now another fatal combination of factors is waiting for another disaster: The divorce has been very recent,the wounds are not healed yet, nevertheless she tookplace behind her pc again, to search for a new partner. She is changing opinions as fast as we are changing underwear, (and I am used to change daily) so she isn't exactly stabile. How can somebody make such a decision in such a state of mind? She is on the edge of falling for number that much in a row, and, again imo, he doesn't deserve the benefits of the doubts. A man who voluntairily offers financial security to a woman who just has divorced, who has been married several times before, who has children out of that relationships, and who is busy with give this all a place in her mind. A man who has the good in mind, would understand this is not the right time to make such a decision, and, more important, the factors for getting a happy marriage are completely missing. If that man indeed only should be looking for a wife to make his life more complete and comfortable, he would have chosen another one. He is probably an immigrant, hopefull a legal one, who has to work hard, having two jobs to keep him and his family alife. I don't think this will work healing for MH. She doesn't want to hear this, just as she didn't like to hear the opinions during the Momen-episode, but when you're talking against a brick wall, sometimes a sledge-hammer is needed. Consider the rude language as the sledge-hammer...
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
Of_gold, I have compiled this for you (and for MH) in the hope that you see what we see.
July 2006, here discussing moving to Egypt with Children. To be with Boyfriend, says how she puts her children first, says this repeatedly, although this would mean taking them away from their dad.
Sept 2006. Unhappy. I quote “Things i do know: I will never be happy as a single person just raising her kids. I have known this point all along. Having kids is wonderful but they do not fill a void inside that is a necessity to me. Love is a necessity to me, to have the comfort and affection of another. “
Which is why she keeps repeating the same pattern and will not listen to us.
“I had found that person you speak of. Actually had 2 different people that filled that. One i loved but when the choice came i found that my love for this man was far stronger. I left that man only a month before we were to be married. The other man i found is here in person, i see him daily at work... There was not anything we didnt agree on, he was very affectionate, wanted to marry, wanted to have children, loved my children beyond what i could believe.... I just couldnt, my heart belongs to the man i am with currently and i found it unfair to that man to be with him or to agree to anything when my heart is with another.”
“I am waiting for a week or so to see if i am contacted at all by either one, if i am then i will change my phone number... again. And if need be i will change my emails also though blocking should have been enough.”
We tried to tell her, she wouldn’t listen. “if i marry him and he dumps me that is my choice and none of this is any of yours places to be doing anything about.”
You know the rest, It didn’t work out with Momen and MH wants to get married to someone else.
Please tell me you see what we see.
I did this because I care, I really do not want to see Mystic going through the same or worse. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
Hope Mrs.`s compilation will show you we are not making up any stories about MH,Of Gold.
...and yes,for all other newbies who were also in lalaland regarding MH .
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Ohhh jeesh.
quote: Sept 2006. Unhappy. I quote “Things i do know: I will never be happy as a single person just raising her kids. I have known this point all along. Having kids is wonderful but they do not fill a void inside that is a necessity to me. Love is a necessity to me, to have the comfort and affection of another. “
I guess that came and went pretty quickly...love is no longer a necessity, I guess now just having someone warm there is. I do worry about the children, if it were just MH it would be one thing but seriously those children will suffer. Posted by Rashaa (Member # 15206) on :
I really think that CBT [Cognitive Behavioral Therapy] might be a better choice here shy of ECT . [that's shock therapy guys...and the later was a joke..] but Mrs. laid it out quite well. Even I didn't know the history, and I feel really sad to see this woman have such little self esteem and love of herself.
I can under the feelings of being attacked, but when you open ur life, you open it to the good and bad comments.
Moreover, there is only so much a person can say or do...as the saying goes..you can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make it drink.
But overall, really sad. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
You mean you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it THINK. Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.: Of_gold, I have compiled this for you (and for MH) in the hope that you see what we see.
July 2006, here discussing moving to Egypt with Children. To be with Boyfriend, says how she puts her children first, says this repeatedly, although this would mean taking them away from their dad.
Sept 2006. Unhappy. I quote “Things i do know: I will never be happy as a single person just raising her kids. I have known this point all along. Having kids is wonderful but they do not fill a void inside that is a necessity to me. Love is a necessity to me, to have the comfort and affection of another. “
Which is why she keeps repeating the same pattern and will not listen to us.
“I had found that person you speak of. Actually had 2 different people that filled that. One i loved but when the choice came i found that my love for this man was far stronger. I left that man only a month before we were to be married. The other man i found is here in person, i see him daily at work... There was not anything we didnt agree on, he was very affectionate, wanted to marry, wanted to have children, loved my children beyond what i could believe.... I just couldnt, my heart belongs to the man i am with currently and i found it unfair to that man to be with him or to agree to anything when my heart is with another.”
“I am waiting for a week or so to see if i am contacted at all by either one, if i am then i will change my phone number... again. And if need be i will change my emails also though blocking should have been enough.”
We tried to tell her, she wouldn’t listen. “if i marry him and he dumps me that is my choice and none of this is any of yours places to be doing anything about.”
You know the rest, It didn’t work out with Momen and MH wants to get married to someone else.
Please tell me you see what we see.
I did this because I care, I really do not want to see Mystic going through the same or worse.
wow, that was impressive.
MYSTIC HEART!!!!
wHAt Up G?
listen, you're right, its good for a Muslim woman to be married, in a safe, secure relationship,very true.
And if you want to marry this guy, go do it! why do you post here, I don't get it??? Honestly, everyone always has the same advice for you. Don't do it. But if you're not going to listen, why ask?
If YOU think that this is the best thing for you, go for it. Who are these random people on this board to tell you otherwise?
But know (this is why I brought up "fobs") this guy can be no different from the Egyptian guys you've had problems with. From what I've seen in the past few years, this is what your indonesian situation looks like:
He's a fob (ok if hes not THAT fresh, but he's still a fob) which MEANS, his family WON'T want you. Thats it. Thats 99.9% of the time going to be true. They don't want a girl from a community they know nothing about it. They don't want a girl whom they have no knowledge of her family or her upbringing. They don't want a girl who isn't indonesian. They probably don't even want a girl from a different part of Indonesia than where they are from. You ran into this problem with Momen, didn't you? They're NOT going to want a girl with children, especially older children.
Lets say you DO get married. His parents aren't going to be happy with it. Its quite possible that his mother will harp on him about it, every chance she gets. Or it could be that they just look at your marriage as a scam their son is running so that he can get money/residency, whatever. And then, sooner than later, he'll either be divorcing you, or bringing home Wifey Numero Dos- who WILL be indonesian.
I'm so happy for you, alhumdulilah, that you've chosen Islam. And I really feel for you, but what you're doing is setting yourself up for another blow! Yeah, you should get married to a nice Muslim guy who wans to take care of you. But WHHHHHY are you willing to enter into a relationship with THIS guy? DOES he have residency here? Probably not. I'm telling you Mysticheart, u should have patience and pray that God just keeps you safe.
Stay away from this guy. Or don't, and then just stop telling your stories here. Theres no need. You're just exposing yourself and your weaknesses for everyone to see, and people just have a poor opinion of you know.
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
so mystic bacame muslim for this momen? so are u now gonna stay muslim mystic dear?
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<indonesian situation>
Posted by cloudberry (Member # 11163) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: What I want to know is how long and how thoroughly everyone knew their spouse before marriage? You can't possibly know everything about them until after marriage. I mean we can try our best, but really how do you know everything?
I don't mind that all, actually I know many that married fast and they are doing fine. What is the case here with mystic - she is not over the latest marriage yet and yet rushing into another one. Many people might have a different opinion but I think this is not a wise move.
Also, when you have had plenty awful marriages or very serious relationships one after another, I am just curious; why do these people end up with the same kind of (bad) husbands (or wives) all the time? Maybe it's time to stop for a while and THINK.
But whatever she chooses, well that truly is HER life, not mine. I am just so (beyond words) amazed after following this story that sometimes I think must must NOT be true.
What I also think that it is very sad she is making her love life public and it would be best for her just to stop this. She just keeps telling and telling (since when...2006?) and why? Is she just craving attention? Pitty?
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
Let's close this case and let her do whatever she fancies.
Everyone told her about how they felt towards her next step, we have warned her as everyone has warned her before getting married to momen last year.
It's her choice now, she is an adult and there is saying in Islam "The believer don't get bitten from the same hole twice.", I guess she is not a believer then!
Posted by Habeeby (Member # 14429) on :
Or as my habeeby says 'don't put your leg in the fire twice' Lol I think Mystic has run out of legs and has moved onto her arms by now...
Well said YEG i think this thread needs to come to a swift end as i am not sure whether we are pandering to Mystics attention seeking behaviour...
Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
Lol @ run out of legs xD
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Habeeby: Or as my habeeby says 'don't put your leg in the fire twice' Lol I think Mystic has run out of legs and has moved onto her arms by now...
Well said YEG i think this thread needs to come to a swift end as i am not sure whether we are pandering to Mystics attention seeking behaviour...
This is a whole Mystic Saga that has run on ES for years now,Habeeby. Who needs soap operas on TV when we have Mystic's Saga on ES???? Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
I am sorry but I have lost the will to live on this thread....goodbye cruel world!!!! Posted by Culture Club (Member # 13767) on :
Hmmm... so MH will get married with Indonesian man?
They are American people, become moslems, considered any other moslem countries to live in, and then decided to live and make some money in Indonesia.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I did not revert for momen Tina, I had studied islam for nearly 5 years before i reverted, i did it cause it felt right and i had taken alot of time to think about it. I am practicing now more than i did when i was with momen, though even then i saw to my prayers and fasting, but reaching out even farther now. As for Indonesians family,, they have already given approval, his brother met me in person, he approves, his sister on phone, she gave approval, and his mother on phone, she gave approval and cant wait for me to come to her so she can get to know me and show me to all of the family there. We had pictures taken together and he sent them to the family as well, they cant wait to have me in their home. As for his green card, its expected in one month, already approved. Has a work permit in the mean time.. and i dont need him to be rich to provide financially for us, just make enough to pay bills and provide a few extras.
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
ooooooooooooooooooooooo i coulda sworn someone said u converted for momen. sorry my bad.
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by Penny: Wow some of this is really bitchy,
why do you all invest so much time in someone who will do exactly what she decides no matter what you say.
She's not listening guys, she never does, it's her life and her family and her choice how she lives it.
Is 24 pages and ES record??????????
Couldn't have said that better!!
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
you are not wrong honey, they did say that, but that is not the truth at all. It is so far from the truth its pathetic. They say that because my reversion came shortly after our marriage, however i had been practicing, learning and living alot of islam's followings for many years. Still tons to learn but all muslims have learning to do. Until now my study has been Quran alone, i have now started reading books on the prophet pbuh and will buy a book on the hadiths to study them though i will still base my belief from quran as many hadiths are debated as to whether they are valid or not.
By the way, someone mentioned something about my new man wanting the girls cut... that wont happen, we have discussed this, it is not something that either of us accept.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I love that you converted MH and I don't think it matters HOW you converted, but I would caution you against thinking Islam is all about marrying any guy for the sake of being married because it is encouraged. It doesn't say 'please marry asap even RIGHT after you divorced, start shopping around, please do NOT be single for longer than a couple of months for goodness sakes women take the first suitor you see and don't expect anything from him except financial stability and a step daddy to your already born children'.
I guess the question is are you willing to raise your children as Muslims? If so, you better make sure this man you're moving in with you will be a good role model for that, especially as you are a convert and might not know everything all of the time. Your responsibility to raise your children as Muslims is much more important that marrying. Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: As for Indonesians family,, they have already given approval, his brother met me in person, he approves, his sister on phone, she gave approval, and his mother on phone, she gave approval and cant wait for me to come to her so she can get to know me and show me to all of the family there. We had pictures taken together and he sent them to the family as well, they cant wait to have me in their home. As for his green card, its expected in one month, already approved. Has a work permit in the mean time.. and i dont need him to be rich to provide financially for us, just make enough to pay bills and provide a few extras.
It is very unusual that an Indonesian family would be so happy and accepting of their "virgin" son marrying a twice divorced foreign woman their son had met through the internet and only physically met twice, especially when the woman is probably around 10 years older than the son, has teenage children he is expected to support, and is not yet out of her Iddah from a man from another country. Quick courtships are not the custom in Indonesia, it is not like the Arab Muslim tradition.
Btw. which part of Indonesia does this young man come from? Bali was mentioned earlier, but Bali is a very small island with a mainly Hindu population and only a very small number of Muslims.
He has a work permit based on his college degree to work in a factory?
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
What I don't understand is that he's been in the states for 8 years to go to school, only works now in a factory and is JUST NOW getting his green card (coincidentally) next month?
Does this strike anyone else as 'odd' ? Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: What I don't understand is that he's been in the states for 8 years to go to school, only works now in a factory and is JUST NOW getting his green card (coincidentally) next month?
Does this strike anyone else as 'odd' ?
Good point Smuckers. He should of had one hell of a degree by now.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: What I don't understand is that he's been in the states for 8 years to go to school, only works now in a factory and is JUST NOW getting his green card (coincidentally) next month?
Does this strike anyone else as 'odd' ?
Me too,Smuckers. Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
ooooooo gosh there are alot of people in usa that have great degrees but they dont use them all of the time!! some have dr llawyer degrees and still work at the pig plant which i can not for the life of me understand y!!! and did he get his degree here? if he got it in his own country then maybe he can not pratice here??
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Just doesn't make sense Tina, that's the thing. Someone doesn't have to be very successful or have a lot of money or some great fancy degree, but coming to the states 8 years ago to get your education, you would assume he got his degree there. After 8 years usually immigrants are in better positions. Like someone said, let's hope he owns the factory, although if he has talked about needing to get a 2nd job to support MH and her crew, it's unlikely.
Why any man would want to hook up with a woman he hardly knows just so he can have a practicing muslim wife even though she had three other children and is recently (within a month) divorced and hard up for money is beyond me. In 8 years he hasn't found a good practicing and covering (praying and fasting) Muslim woman WITHOUT kids or one who has managed to save some amount of money over the years? Wow, MH was just waiting to be discovered, a diamond in the rough, so to speak. Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
i can see what yr tryin to say smuckers but i guess time will tell .lets see if the diamond shines bright!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Let's hope but the odds aren't good considering ~
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I did not revert for momen Tina, I had studied islam for nearly 5 years before i reverted, i did it cause it felt right and i had taken alot of time to think about it. I am practicing now more than i did when i was with momen, though even then i saw to my prayers and fasting, but reaching out even farther now. As for Indonesians family,, they have already given approval, his brother met me in person, he approves, his sister on phone, she gave approval, and his mother on phone, she gave approval and cant wait for me to come to her so she can get to know me and show me to all of the family there. We had pictures taken together and he sent them to the family as well, they cant wait to have me in their home. As for his green card, its expected in one month, already approved. Has a work permit in the mean time.. and i dont need him to be rich to provide financially for us, just make enough to pay bills and provide a few extras.
That is such bullcrap its beyond even words. I know lots of muslim women here who are very modest, young and never been married. You can never see when you are being taken advantage of mystic. You believe every word coming out of these men's mouths absolutely without question, its the most pathetic thing I have ever seen .
He CANNOT stay in the US on a student visa for 8 yrs WITHOUT being a fulltime student, nor can he then convert it to a work visa. He must reapply at his embassy. They WILL NOT issue work visa's for factory jobs. Overseas visa scams are not the only visa scams. It is common here for people who came and overstayed to also get married-he is buying his visa from you without paying the going rate-here its $20,000 cash to help an immigrant secure status. Some men are too cheap to pay so they do it this way pretend they love and want to take care of you. I met many of these men when I was with my exboyfriend sunny-he had tons of friends that were doing this. Hell, I've been solicited many times to marry like that from his friends after him and I split up.
Don't be a fool again Mystic, you want to marry again so fast cause you cant be alone then fine but for god's sake make sure you see his greencard with YOUR OWN EYES PRIOR TO MARRIAGE!!!
Maybe you don't see this stuff because you live in a small city in the midwest but I see it all the time because I have many friends who are immigrants,have been approached and offered the cash for visa marriage deal. Hell, my closest friend cannot secure her status even with her boss in Long Island sponsoring her-and he is an extremely wealthy man. They are no longer taking sponsorship unless a job is catergory 1 class.
When you "interview" these men make sure you see their papers with your own eyes first or else it is a guarantee they are looking to secure status. This is a 100% guarantee , especially for a man who has been in the US for 8 yrs-it is absolute BULLSHIT. I can guarantee with my whole bank account that next month the greencard won't come and it will be the month after then the month after..by this time he will have you then all of a sudden things got "messed up, damn government". Next it will be well I have to reapply now that I am married and you being so stupid will fall for it hook,line and sinker...because you have already shown him your an easy play.
I will bet every penny I have that this will happen -you are falling for such a stupid scam. Face facts Mystic and stop being such an Idiot just so you can validate to yourself that you are a "good woman". You don't need a man to do that, you have only to look at yourself and your children to give your life validation...
Actually, I had an afterthought so Im editing. If your just looking for financial support than maybe this won't bother you so since your about to fall for a marriage for visa scam then make sure you secure at least the $20,000 cash in an account you can put it in your marriage contract that he will have have to give you 5,000 in a seperate account in your name only for the next 4 years, about the amount of time it takes to secure his status before he can divorce you. Then on top of that he must financially support you,pay all the household bills and whatever you earn you just keep for your kids and add it to the money you asked for in the marriage contract. You might come out in a considerably better position- just a thought since your willing to prostitute yourself for a "marriage of financial convinience"..
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Mystic gets scammed again...lovely. Posted by Yowza (Member # 14400) on :
quote: That is such bullcrap its beyond even words. I know lots of muslim women here who are very modest, young and never been married. You can never see when you are being taken advantage of mystic. You believe every word coming out of these men's mouths absolutely without question, its the most pathetic thing I have ever seen [Roll Eyes] .
He CANNOT stay in the US on a student visa for 8 yrs WITHOUT being a fulltime student, nor can he then convert it to a work visa. He must reapply at his embassy. They WILL NOT issue work visa's for factory jobs. Overseas visa scams are not the only visa scams. It is common here for people who came and overstayed to also get married-he is buying his visa from you without paying the going rate-here its $20,000 cash to help an immigrant secure status. Some men are too cheap to pay so they do it this way pretend they love and want to take care of you. I met many of these men when I was with my exboyfriend sunny-he had tons of friends that were doing this. Hell, I've been solicited many times to marry like that from his friends after him and I split up.
Don't be a fool again Mystic, you want to marry again so fast cause you cant be alone then fine but for god's sake make sure you see his greencard with YOUR OWN EYES PRIOR TO MARRIAGE!!!
Maybe you don't see this stuff because you live in a small city in the midwest but I see it all the time because I have many friends who are immigrants,have been approached and offered the cash for visa marriage deal. Hell, my closest friend cannot secure her status even with her boss in Long Island sponsoring her-and he is an extremely wealthy man. They are no longer taking sponsorship unless a job is catergory 1 class.
When you "interview" these men make sure you see their papers with your own eyes first or else it is a guarantee they are looking to secure status. This is a 100% guarantee , especially for a man who has been in the US for 8 yrs-it is absolute BULLSHIT. I can guarantee with my whole bank account that next month the greencard won't come and it will be the month after then the month after..by this time he will have you then all of a sudden things got "messed up, damn government". Next it will be well I have to reapply now that I am married and you being so stupid will fall for it hook,line and sinker...because you have already shown him your an easy play.
I will bet every penny I have that this will happen -you are falling for such a stupid scam. Face facts Mystic and stop being such an Idiot just so you can validate to yourself that you are a "good woman". [Roll Eyes] You don't need a man to do that, you have only to look at yourself and your children to give your life validation...
Actually, I had an afterthought so Im editing. If your just looking for financial support than maybe this won't bother you so since your about to fall for a marriage for visa scam then make sure you secure at least the $20,000 cash in an account you can put it in your marriage contract that he will have have to give you 5,000 in a seperate account in your name only for the next 4 years, about the amount of time it takes to secure his status before he can divorce you. Then on top of that he must financially support you,pay all the household bills and whatever you earn you just keep for your kids and add it to the money you asked for in the marriage contract. You might come out in a considerably better position- just a thought since your willing to prostitute yourself for a "marriage of financial convinience"..
Very well said!
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
Is it possible to live in the US for 8 years, by having a student-visa? Here the study-time is limited to max 5 years, and they rate the results yearly, when study is going bad, he/she is sended back to where he/she came from. The amount of money for an arrangement immigrant-secure status is in dollars 35.000 !!! They defenitly need two jobs to pay that off, by working 12 hours a day for minimal payment...
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by ?????: Is it possible to live in the US for 8 years, by having a student-visa? Here the study-time is limited to max 5 years, and they rate the results yearly, when study is going bad, he/she is sended back to where he/she came from. The amount of money for an arrangement immigrant-secure status is in dollars 35.000 !!! They defenitly need two jobs to pay that off, by working 12 hours a day for minimal payment...
No they cannot ???? Read my post above. The going rate in US dollars is $20,000 not 35,000 plus whatever financial considerations that are pre-arranged..
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
I meant the amount of money that they have to pay in Europe, for that becoming secure...
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by ?????: I meant the amount of money that they have to pay in Europe, for that becoming secure...
35,000 in Europe. Well I would say that's a good chunk of cash. Do they get the money upfront. How long does it take to secure status in Europe for an immigrant?
Posted by Snidely Whiplash (Member # 15126) on :
dear ballisticheart:
your so desperate
any man can see what a fool u are
people lik u should be castrated
bye
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I said he came on a student visa, didnt say that is what he remained on did i. His twin obtained a green card 6 years ago and filed papers for him to remain in the states. It has taken this long to get the sibling paperwork finished and greencard approved, it takes much longer for these cases than for marriage cases. His mother had concerns when he first mentioned me to her but after talking with him and me both and understanding this is what he really wants she is happy for him and excited that he will marry as she has wanted him married for a long time. She wants me to come to her as soon as possible however i have told him i do not want to travel to his family alone, so we will wait a few months after we marry, which wont be for a few months more. So i probably wont go until beginning of the year. If she becomes too upset with my not coming to her then if he can take off work we will go, if not then i will go with his sister in law as she has traveled to see them and has gotten to know them very well. They accept a divorced american woman because his brother married one 7 years ago and she has visited them several times and they adore her, so accepting that he will also marry american woman is not hard for them. Not everyone is so closed minded. He doesnt come from Bali, he comes from Java.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I guess the promised vacation to the daughter is on hold while momma runs off to get married...again. Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
I think MH is wishing momen is reading this and she is wishing that he go crazy and call her or email her to get back to her! Save your breath, he won't!
I think that MH is talking to momen but pretending she is talking to us!
Why on earth do you care so much about telling everyone on ES about your personal plans and telling us about all the tiny details in your personal life!
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I talked with her about the vacation because at the moment i dont have the money to be able to take her. She said that as long as i take her at some point its ok, instead we will go to florida for a week or so and then will take them to new hampshire as well for a week or so when the marriage takes place. She is ok with it as right now she has a boyfriend here that she is not so eager to leave behind. Told her possibly next spring during her spring break we will come to egypt
Ahmed grow up, I have momens emails addresses, several of them, I know how to contact him. I told him already through emails a few weeks ago about my plans asking for the divorce papers so that i could have them to take for the possible upcoming marriage to which he sent them to me. I have exchanged emails with him once a week each week since our break up until last week, at which point i said all i had to say and havent bothered to contact him since. I dont care what he is doing or who he is with, he made his choice, whatever. I wont waste one more second on him. YOU YOURSELF should grow up, i mean you come on here putting me down when you have a son just born on the 21st of april and havent bothered to ask about him at all. You are just scum, though i have told her that she should be happy you havent asked about him, that baby is much better off in life without you in it.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
If you are so in need of financial support how can you even take a weeks vacation at all EVEN IN YOUR OWN CITY? You need to sell your home, sell your car, anything you need to do to cut your debt. You do NOT need to get yourself into this situation that will not come out well, take all of our word for that. The best gift you can give your children is independence and teaching them about money and budgeting and surviving through difficult times....what you are doing is anything but that. Posted by Rashaa (Member # 15206) on :
and the mud slinging continues........
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: It is common here for people who came and overstayed to also get married-he is buying his visa from you without paying the going rate-here its $20,000 cash to help an immigrant secure status.
Yep.
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: I think that MH is talking to momen but pretending she is talking to us!
Yep again.
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I said he came on a student visa, didnt say that is what he remained on did i. His twin obtained a green card 6 years ago and filed papers for him to remain in the states. It has taken this long to get the sibling paperwork finished and greencard approved, it takes much longer for these cases than for marriage cases. His mother had concerns when he first mentioned me to her but after talking with him and me both and understanding this is what he really wants she is happy for him and excited that he will marry as she has wanted him married for a long time. She wants me to come to her as soon as possible however i have told him i do not want to travel to his family alone, so we will wait a few months after we marry, which wont be for a few months more. So i probably wont go until beginning of the year. If she becomes too upset with my not coming to her then if he can take off work we will go, if not then i will go with his sister in law as she has traveled to see them and has gotten to know them very well. They accept a divorced american woman because his brother married one 7 years ago and she has visited them several times and they adore her, so accepting that he will also marry american woman is not hard for them. Not everyone is so closed minded. He doesnt come from Bali, he comes from Java.
Thats what they all say nitwit The point is you are so guillibly believing everything HE tells you, Just as you did with momen. I am right and you are gonna get played again. When it doesn't work out, I'll hook you up with a nice muslim man looking for his papers, and I'll make sure you get a nice chunk of money as long as I get a couple of grand out of the deal. Someone has to look out for your stupid ass , I will act as your Walli and make sure you have the financial security you are looking for Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I said he came on a student visa, didnt say that is what he remained on did i. His twin obtained a green card 6 years ago and filed papers for him to remain in the states. It has taken this long to get the sibling paperwork finished and greencard approved, it takes much longer for these cases than for marriage cases. His mother had concerns when he first mentioned me to her but after talking with him and me both and understanding this is what he really wants she is happy for him and excited that he will marry as she has wanted him married for a long time. She wants me to come to her as soon as possible however i have told him i do not want to travel to his family alone, so we will wait a few months after we marry, which wont be for a few months more. So i probably wont go until beginning of the year. If she becomes too upset with my not coming to her then if he can take off work we will go, if not then i will go with his sister in law as she has traveled to see them and has gotten to know them very well. They accept a divorced american woman because his brother married one 7 years ago and she has visited them several times and they adore her, so accepting that he will also marry american woman is not hard for them. Not everyone is so closed minded. He doesnt come from Bali, he comes from Java.
Thats what they all say nitwit The point is you are so guillibly believing everything HE tells you, Just as you did with momen. I am right and you are gonna get played again. When it doesn't work out, I'll hook you up with a nice muslim man looking for his papers, and I'll make sure you get a nice chunk of money as long as I get a couple of grand out of the deal. Someone has to look out for your stupid ass , I will act as your Walli and make sure you have the financial security you are looking for
thats a damn good idea!!! as long as the woman doesnt have to sleep with him!!!
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: Someone has to look out for your stupid ass , I will act as your Walli and make sure you have the financial security you are looking for
*Elbows Rumi out of the way*
I'll do it for a better price than Rumi because I will negotiate to your advantage so you get all of your money (and gold) up front because those of us who know how this scam goes also know that legal papers (read: Green Card) are walking papers.
*Grinning my lillie-white ass off*
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I'll just sit and watch the car crash...god help the children. Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: They accept a divorced american woman because his brother married one 7 years ago and she has visited them several times and they adore her, so accepting that he will also marry american woman is not hard for them.
HELLO, NITWIT!!! Do you seriously need to be beaten over a head to see whats right in your face??????????????????
The brother did it and got his greencard, now he is doing it. Of course the family doesn't have a problem with it, both having status will enable them to support the fam back in Indonesia. They will be able to buy a business together legally . Are you seriously, seriously this mentally challenged??????
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: Someone has to look out for your stupid ass , I will act as your Walli and make sure you have the financial security you are looking for
*Elbows Rumi out of the way*
I'll do it for a better price than Rumi because I will negotiate to your advantage so you get all of your money (and gold) up front because those of us who know how this scam goes also know that legal papers (read: Green Card) are walking papers.
*Grinning my lillie-white ass off*
Damn, Out Schooled by Just Visiting!!!
I thought I was being a smart pimp, guess your smarter. Posted by Alchemist Cake Girl (Member # 12318) on :
If this thing reaches 30 pages I swear to god that I am coming after you all. Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: Damn, Out Schooled by Just Visiting!!!
I thought I was being a smart pimp, guess your smarter.
Of course I'm not any smarter than you. This is so common in communities with larger immigrant populations and I've seen it many, many times is all.
Ever hear the wife complain that when she asks her husband for an installment of their contract he finds a way out of it (he'll have to borrow it from his brother because all of his money supports family, either here or back home, or, more common "I love you and I spend at least that much taking care of you")? And these women fall for it, every single time.
I could never understand why women don't ask for it all up front - but maybe they have never heard of a "dower" which is perfectly legal in some states, that's all.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
only one catch in your little comments, i have spoken with his brother and sister in law and have also read all of the immigration papers pertaining to his case. I know exactly what is going on with his immigration this way. He doesnt need me at all for this, i asked for proof of that and was given the proof with all of the documents. How can i afford even a week? I am not completely broke, i do have a bit of money left however, he paid for everything including my expense of taking off work. He is also offering to pay for repairs that i need done around my home. I have not accepted this offer yet, told him that if we do end up married then i will consider allowing this but he is pushing the issue. He will arrive for a visit in a few weeks and has informed me that i will be taking the money for the repairs or he will be contacting someone to do the repairs himself and paying upfront to that person.
Oh yes, smuckers, i have no debt. My home is paid off, my vehicle is paid off, there is no debt. The only bills i have are my monthly bills for electric and such. I am not desperate, just seeking a bit of security, someone to contribute as well so i can actually save more, well, i will be any way without the trips but, 2 incomes is always better than one. This will ensure college for the children if they choose, many more things.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Well that wraps it. MH has an answer for everything, just like she did with Momen and the one before that. Alchemist, if this reaches 30 pages I'll buy you cake when you come visit this summer. Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
And I never could understand women who didn't know any money he spends courting her will come out of her bride price, er, I mean dower.
You're gonna want to get estimates, MH, because YOU will be paying for all of this.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Alchemist Cake Girl: If this thing reaches 30 pages I swear to god that I am coming after you all.
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
MH, I need some repairs on my house. Ya think he will take on a second wife...
...heck, I know a good thing when I see it... Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I am not asking for a dowery, only the conditions that he will provide financially and that the decisions regarding my children remain in my control not his, that he will not take a second wife. These things will be put into the contract.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I am not asking for a dowery,
here we go again ~
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
I dunno, if I were marrying for money...I would go for big money... Posted by Insane In Da MemBrane (Member # 14028) on :
have nothing to say really just pushing the pages to 28 it for now
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: Damn, Out Schooled by Just Visiting!!!
I thought I was being a smart pimp, guess your smarter.
Of course I'm not any smarter than you. This is so common in communities with larger immigrant populations and I've seen it many, many times is all.
Ever hear the wife complain that when she asks her husband for an installment of their contract he finds a way out of it (he'll have to borrow it from his brother because all of his money supports family, either here or back home, or, more common "I love you and I spend at least that much taking care of you")? And these women fall for it, every single time.
I could never understand why women don't ask for it all up front - but maybe they have never heard of a "dower" which is perfectly legal in some states, that's all.
Your right. I'm just trying to ease it on to mystic as she expects so little, I think she would have seizures and collapsed if she asked for that kind of money up front,lol . I actually know most have the money saved to pay up front-they have huge sums of money waiting to buy businesses once they are "legal".
It's so common in Queens-walk down liberty ave and about 95% are illegal. They just had a raid in New Haven not too long ago. I never thought about it until I started dating sunny(Indian) and then I really couldn't believe how many were here illegal and they actually put a price on marrying for visas. Its probably much worse than the overseas visa scams-once they are here illegally about the only way they can stay is if they get married or can prove they have a political asylum hardship case. Big business for business minded women looking to make some cash Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv:
quote:Originally posted by ?????: I meant the amount of money that they have to pay in Europe, for that becoming secure...
35,000 in Europe. Well I would say that's a good chunk of cash. Do they get the money upfront. How long does it take to secure status in Europe for an immigrant?
The money is payed in parts, to avoid that the lady dissappears with her newly gathered fortune. Perhaps superfluous to mention, but most of the time it are not the most neat ladies; former immigrants who came in the same way, prospectless single parents not impeded by a surplus to intellectual capacities, or just the young women who have the habit to spend more money as they can permit, so in financial problems. It takes at least three years, but because of the tightened up immigration laws now it usally is a multiple of that. There are women that came in by marriage, divorced after getting a new nationality, and have been married twice after that, to earn the money they've payed back from another one. They will do the same, so its a kind of an inkspot, it multiplies to fast.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
BTW, there are raids regularry, most of the time in the places were illegals use to work: foreign restaurants. The company where I work, usually has to work in technical installations, placed on roofs or in paces, and they see them a lot, sleeping during the day, because usually they work at night. (Because there were no raids at night)
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
la migra !!!!!!! Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
i think i have a migraine Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
la migra smuckers? enlighten ?
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by manx: la migra smuckers? enlighten ?
"la migra" is the short term in Spanish for "la policia de inmigracion",that is,police in charge of raiding illegal inmigrants. Since a large number of this inmigrants are Mexican,hence the slang term in Spanish. At the sight of this police,the illegals shout to their buddies: "la migra!!!!"
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
^^^ Thanks Sash. (if you're ever in the states and your dry cleaners pisses you off, just shout LA MIGRA as loudly as you can and they will lose all of their workers) Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: la migra !!!!!!!
Posted by Dawn-Bev* (Member # 15190) on :
MH - when he wants his 'husbandly-rights-sex', are you just going to lie there and not feel revulsion?
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
I went to college in Cow Hampshire and am curious as to how a Javanese man and his twin would have decided to settle in one of the whiteset most conservative unhospitable cold unfriendly places towards forigners in the US? If he is doing factory work in NH, then it is suckass miserable factory work. And he is NOT makign a good living, he is scratching one out, and has 10 white fat american rednecks who hate him for it. Javanese men aren't anything like Egyptian men, and Java is nowhere near the middle east. Do some freaking research for yourself here. Java is a MoFo POOR COUNTRY. And you are all excited because his parents gave their approval? Hell they'd let him marry a transsexual man if it meant he didnt have to go back to Java and sell satay on the street. Thier approval doesn't serve as a stamp of "good girl" or "good woman". In fact it doesn't even freaking MATTER!
You think Arabs are all dying to come to America, and now that you haven't managed to find one in the past 4 dating cycles that can relocate, now you are fishing in a closer lake? Forigners who are unwed in America? 8 years is a long time for a good man to stay single.. wonder what his REAL issues are, and how long till they surface? I have to ask, is the only qualifying factor for you religion? Because you don't seem to have even a SHORT LIST of qualities you desire in a partner.
MH, all of "this" this entire body of work you are writing about your trials and tribulations is just so regrettable. I wish I'd never had to think about your screwball situation, or your desparation, or your kids, or your dying ex-husband in the yard, or your broken down house in the middle of nowhere. I don't care anymore if you are going to be happy, and frankly I don't give a crap about your kids. If I was your teenage daughter I wouldn't even want to go on a one night vacation in the next city over, because you are a hijab wearing slut and apparantly all it takes to open your legs is a whiff of marriage, or the premise of allah. I certain that you are a complete embarassment to those girls and they mark the days until you go on your next "marriage mission". Because when you aren't there, they don't have to deal with te idea that you DATE AND MARRY MEN FROM THE INTERNET THAT LIVE IN FORIGEN COUNTRIES. (ho now Doodle, you haven't torn through 3/4 men, you don't qualify) I can hear it now, "Hey Angela you want to get together this weekend?" "Sure Jeremy my Mom is going to Egypt to try and get this dude to move here, and get this, he doesn't even read and write english, you should see her preening on webcam, it's so gross, and she thinks its so cute". "You mean your Mom dates off the webcam?" "Dude, my mom gets MARRIED off the webcam!" "So can we have sex at your house when she is gone?"
You have some foul need to justify your expensive habit of screwing men overseas by marrying them. Save yourself some trouble and at least admit what you are doing, and respect yourself for it. Plenty of sexual predators out there, and you are one of them. You think your american muslim blue eyed self is going to prove so irresistable that any dark eyed man is going to bend over backwards to get at you. You.. used goods. Green card or not, if my son was looking to marry a woman who had just gone through the STUPID SELF INFLICTED ordeal you just went through LAST MONTH, I'd kick him in his brown ass. AND I AM A NICE PERSON!
I think you are ridiculously uneducated and perhaps even a little bit towards the "low end of normal". You are living proof that even simpletons can use the internet. Cast your net wide my dear, because you are going to need that one specific fish, one that is kind enough not to look at you like a freaking Lucky Irish Leprechaun and take advantage of your inability to manage your emotional affairs, you will accept ANYTHING that swims by, just as long as they see the true suffereing victim that you have been made into. And heads up MH, THEY DONT CARE EITHER. You said that your new dude rejected a girl from home because she had been sexually active before him.. you don't think that the argument you are having here over your iddah makes you seem a little whorey? Why would he take YOU over HER? You are bickering technical issues on when you last laid with a HUSBAND, and he threw a girl out on principal?
GAH! Go get married AGAIN and get so busy praying and living the godly life that I never hear of you again!!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: I went to college in Cow Hampshire and am curious as to how a Javanese man and his twin would have decided to settle in one of the whiteset most conservative unhospitable cold unfriendly places towards forigners in the US? If he is doing factory work in NH, then it is suckass miserable factory work. And he is NOT makign a good living, he is scratching one out, and has 10 white fat american rednecks who hate him for it. Javanese men aren't anything like Egyptian men, and Java is nowhere near the middle east. Do some freaking research for yourself here. Java is a MoFo POOR COUNTRY. And you are all excited because his parents gave their approval? Hell they'd let him marry a transsexual man if it meant he didnt have to go back to Java and sell satay on the street. Thier approval doesn't serve as a stamp of "good girl" or "good woman". In fact it doesn't even freaking MATTER! You think Arabs are all dying to come to American, and now that you haven't managed to find on in the past 4 dating cycles that can relocate, now you are fishing in a closer lake? Forigeners who are unwed in America? 8 years is a long time for a good man to stay single.. wonder what his REAL issues are, and how long till they surface? I have to ask, is the only qualifying factor for you religion? Because you don't seem to have even a SHORT LIST of qualities you desire in a partner. MH, all of "this" this entire body of work you are writing about your trials and tribulations is just so regrettable. I wish I'd never had to think about your screwball situation, or your desparation, or your kids, or your dying exhusband in the yard, or your broken down house in the middle of nowhere. I don't care anymore if you are going to be happy, and frankly I don't give a crap about your kids. If I was your teenage daughter I wouldn't want to go on a one night vacation in the next city ovber, because you are a hijab wearing slut and apparantly all it takes to open your legs is a whiff of marriage, or the presence of allah. You have some foul need to justify your expensive habit of screwing men overseas by marrying them. Save yourself some trouble and at least admit what you are doing, and respect yourself for it. Plenty of sexual predators out there, and you are one of them. You think your american muslim blue eyed self is goign to prove so irresistable that any dark eyed man is going to bend over backwards to get at you. You.. used goods. Green card or not, if my son was looking to marry a woman who had just gone through the STUPID SELF INFLICTED ordeal you just went through LAST MONTH, I'd kick him in his brown ass. I think you are ridiculously uneducated and perhaps even a little bit towards the "low end of normal". You are living proof that even simpletons can use the internet. Cast your net wide my dear, because you are going to need that one specific fish, one that is kind enough not to look at you like a freaking Lucky Irish Leprechaun and take advantage of your inability to manage your emotional affairs, you will accept ANYTHING that swims by, just as long as they see the true suffereing victim that you have been made into. And heads up MH, THEY DONT CARE EITHER. You said that your new dude rejected a girl fromhome because she had been sexually active before him.. you don't think that the argument you are having here over your iddah makes you seem a little whorey? Why would he take YOU over HER? You are bickering technical issues on when you last laid with a HUSBAND, and he threw a girl out on principal?
GAH! Go get married AGAIN and get so busy praying and living the godly life that I never hear of you again!!
Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
You have a problem with that my dear Smucks? I can take some parts out???
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: Your right.
Oh, I know I am. And so are you.
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: It's so common in Queens-walk down liberty ave and about 95% are illegal.
Ever been to Dearborn?
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: You have a problem with that my dear Smucks? I can take some parts out???
lol Nooo it's brutually honest, but I fear most here won't appreciate your directness as some others of us will. Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
Like I care.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
lol Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I am not asking for a dowery, only the conditions that he will provide financially and that the decisions regarding my children remain in my control not his, that he will not take a second wife. These things will be put into the contract.
Of course you aren't asking for a dowery. You can't. You're a woman. And if you don't ask for DOWER you are either stupid (which is probably why he just can't wait to get to the nuptuals as he's really found a sucker) or not telling the whole story because you've already worked that all out.
Oh, and the second wife? Chances are you ARE the second wife so, of course, he's being "honest" in the agreement.
So, how is it mom's English is that damn good? Anybody know?
Posted by Miss Sharm (Member # 12405) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dawn-Bev*: MH - when he wants his 'husbandly-rights-sex', are you just going to lie there and not feel revulsion?
She will probably lie back and think of America or should that be Egypt Posted by Alchemist Cake Girl (Member # 12318) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Well that wraps it. MH has an answer for everything, just like she did with Momen and the one before that. Alchemist, if this reaches 30 pages I'll buy you cake when you come visit this summer.
T H I R T y
P A G E S
N O W ! ! ! !
I
W A N T
C A K E
N O W ! ! !
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Alchemist Cake Girl:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Well that wraps it. MH has an answer for everything, just like she did with Momen and the one before that. Alchemist, if this reaches 30 pages I'll buy you cake when you come visit this summer.
T H I R T y
P A G E S
N O W ! ! ! !
I
W A N T
C A K E
N O W ! ! !
Uh,huhh...noooo.We're still on page 26th
*slams door on Alchemist's poking out hand*
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
just made my girl a cake NOW come get it Posted by Snidely Whiplash (Member # 15126) on :
joke {stop me if u heard this 1 before} what do ya do when u cant get the egyptian guy u want?
marry the asian guy for $$$
hahahahahaha i kill me
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
forgive me but I can't sift through this....is she getting married again? is she pregnant? anyone have a summary? page 27 omg.
Posted by doodlebug (Member # 11649) on :
.
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
Cosmo, I dont think ANYONE will disagree with what you said, I feel a bit guilty that it made me laugh but you have SUCH a way with words!
To everyone else, What makes you think that Mystic would even care whether this guy was marrying for a green card when she doesn't care how her kids will be affected by everything? She's not likely to care about the rest of the US if she's not bothered about them.
Posted by Rashaa (Member # 15206) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: ^^^ Thanks Sash. (if you're ever in the states and your dry cleaners pisses you off, just shout LA MIGRA as loudly as you can and they will lose all of their workers)
hahaahahahahhaha
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
If I were in her shoes, I would have been out of here a long time ago, after all that comments... There is so much in her behaviour that I simply can't imagine, that it seems rather unbelievable. But what I find even more strange: What about HER family? They seem to go along in every step she makes...
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: you are a hijab wearing slut
This makes me think of a woman I knew who converted because she "liked the clothes" (her words, not mine). For the hefty sum of $10,000 (half up front), she agreed to be the second wife of a man 25 years older than her on the condition her son was hers to discipline, she would work if she felt like it, she wouldn't cook, clean, or "do" him, and she'd come and go as she pleased.
She got pregnant on her wedding night because "he was sooooooo sweeeeeet." Soon she learned that when he looked up from the television and said "cook" (one of about six English words he knew), she'd better get herself in the kitchen and make something that would make him happy.
Six years of welfare, minimum wage jobs, and two trips back home later, he slid back into town because, donchaknow, the ONLY work he could find was out of state, just in time for their income tax refund to show up in the mail box, and jetted off to back home with their daughter and son, leaving her pregnant (with her #4, his #14, and their #3) and BROKE.
This same guy was forever introducing me to one of his "buddies from the Mosque" because, hey, if SHE did it and I'm HER "friend," maybe I would do it, too.
Hey, MH, why won't you ask for it if it's called a dower from an Indonesian Muslim and why is a mahr from an Egyptian Muslim is a-okay?
Posted by citizen (Member # 1344) on :
Let's keep it going for another 30 pages than we can publish and make a fortune - look how gripped we all are.
Mystic gets 10% royalties so her financial problems will be solved, she won't have to sell herself.
It'll be whole new genre, somewhere between chick lit and misery memoir. Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by citizen: It'll be whole new genre, somewhere between chick list and misery memoir.
That spot is known as Pain Club.
Is anyone else compuslively clicking refresh like they have nothing else to do, or just me?
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by citizen: It'll be whole new genre, somewhere between chick list and misery memoir.
That spot is known as Pain Club.
Is anyone else compuslively clicking refresh like they have nothing else to do, or just me?
*looking furtively from side to side*
Err...hemmm Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.: Cosmo, I dont think ANYONE will disagree with what you said, I feel a bit guilty that it made me laugh but you have SUCH a way with words!
To everyone else, What makes you think that Mystic would even care whether this guy was marrying for a green card when she doesn't care how her kids will be affected by everything? She's not likely to care about the rest of the US if she's not bothered about them.
I agree with you Mrs. Cosmo is damn straight honest and I can 100% say I would rather have the brutually honest then the sniveling weak. Most of the woman on here like this have a track record of being very caring woman. I don't see any bitchiness in any of this. I see a bunch of women who make their way in life with pride and dignity who know what they are talking about and I would take any of these women over some of the sniveling whiny gushy lovey dovey doormats on here. Brutually honest women are much better friends to have and 100% will be there for you when the chips are down, and give you a sharp kick in the ass when you definitely need it.
For those that think its cruel,well I think many of them haven't had to go through 3 yrs of this sniveling whining crap, never taking advice just acting like a stupid teenager when she is a damn grown woman. For a woman to actually come back with a reply to every bit of advice that women on here who have been with her through all of this, have given her accurate advice before is completely childish and shows her mental instability. She would rather take the word of people she met TWICE as the gospel truth, how stupid can you be.
I cannot believe I also contributed to this twisted freak having almost 30 pages of idiocy. Maybe cause as women we really have a hard time grasping that a woman can be this twisted, sadistic, sadly pathetic. We are all Moms and I think most of the fact that has gotten to me is how a woman like this actually has been able to function as a mother . I am sorry Alchemist for my part in this freakshow. I swear I will bring cake. Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: you are a hijab wearing slut
This makes me think of a woman I knew who converted because she "liked the clothes" (her words, not mine). For the hefty sum of $10,000 (half up front), she agreed to be the second wife of a man 25 years older than her on the condition her son was hers to discipline, she would work if she felt like it, she wouldn't cook, clean, or "do" him, and she'd come and go as she pleased.
She got pregnant on her wedding night because "he was sooooooo sweeeeeet." Soon she learned that when he looked up from the television and said "cook" (one of about six English words he knew), she'd better get herself in the kitchen and make something that would make him happy.
Six years of welfare, minimum wage jobs, and two trips back home later, he slid back into town because, donchaknow, the ONLY work he could find was out of state, just in time for their income tax refund to show up in the mail box, and jetted off to back home with their daughter and son, leaving her pregnant (with her #4, his #14, and their #3) and BROKE.
This same guy was forever introducing me to one of his "buddies from the Mosque" because, hey, if SHE did it and I'm HER "friend," maybe I would do it, too.
Hey, MH, why won't you ask for it if it's called a dower from an Indonesian Muslim and why is a mahr from an Egyptian Muslim is a-okay?
She liked the clothes... Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: you are a hijab wearing slut
This makes me think of a woman I knew who converted because she "liked the clothes" (her words, not mine). For the hefty sum of $10,000 (half up front), she agreed to be the second wife of a man 25 years older than her on the condition her son was hers to discipline, she would work if she felt like it, she wouldn't cook, clean, or "do" him, and she'd come and go as she pleased.
She got pregnant on her wedding night because "he was sooooooo sweeeeeet." Soon she learned that when he looked up from the television and said "cook" (one of about six English words he knew), she'd better get herself in the kitchen and make something that would make him happy.
Six years of welfare, minimum wage jobs, and two trips back home later, he slid back into town because, donchaknow, the ONLY work he could find was out of state, just in time for their income tax refund to show up in the mail box, and jetted off to back home with their daughter and son, leaving her pregnant (with her #4, his #14, and their #3) and BROKE.
This same guy was forever introducing me to one of his "buddies from the Mosque" because, hey, if SHE did it and I'm HER "friend," maybe I would do it, too.
Hey, MH, why won't you ask for it if it's called a dower from an Indonesian Muslim and why is a mahr from an Egyptian Muslim is a-okay?
...and you didn't take him JV? What on Earth were you thinking girl? What about feeling complete?
This story makes my x husband look good and that's not easily done.
When I start feeling jealous or lonely because I don't have a hubby I can always come to ES to remind me of how good I have it. Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
Is it just me or is MH just an attention seeker and we are feeding her habit by continuing to contribute to this thread?
My sick bucket floweth over Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
wiping advocates head from the sweat do to vomiting Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: ...and you didn't take him JV? What on Earth were you thinking girl? What about feeling complete?
I'm full enough of myself; I don't have room for anyone else.
True story:
My first encounter with Mr. Wonderful (literally, at the water cooler):
Mr. W.: "Hello." ME: "Sorry, I don't fix papers."
No kidding.
I suppose that reaction came from years of desperate men begging me to marry one of these desperate men - up to and including telephone calls from across the planet (God help you if they get their hands on your phone number) in the middle of the night. They're relentless.
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
I'm going on a hen weekend on Thursday to Magaluf, shall I take MH's details and distribute to the Spanish men? We could widen her options a little more Posted by cbrbddd (Member # 3891) on :
hmmmmmm, don't any of us have anything better to do????
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
quote:Originally posted by cbrbddd: hmmmmmm, don't any of us have anything better to do????
....obviously not!
Although come Thursday I'll be having sun, sand and sangria!!!! Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
I Heart Cosmo!
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
(God help you if they get their hands on your phone number) _________________________________________________ That's so typical, when we were first together, I miss dialled his number and spent the next few weeks fending off an Omar, followed by Omar's friend Mohamed Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by cbrbddd: hmmmmmm, don't any of us have anything better to do????
Whooooo??Why are you looking at me??? Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by advocate:
quote:Originally posted by cbrbddd: hmmmmmm, don't any of us have anything better to do????
....obviously not!
Although come Thursday I'll be having sun, sand and sangria!!!!
You`re going to Spain,Advocate???What part?? Im soooo jealous..... I just came from there,exactly from Granada,less than a month ago. Spain is like second home to me.........weeeeeee! Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
im determined to get to page 30
1
a m
d e t e r m i n e d
t o
g e t
t o
p a g e
3 0 ,
b u t
i
m i g h t
h a v e
t o
d o
m o r e
t o m o r r o w .
w h e r e
i s
t h e
p o p c o r n
i n
t h i s
t h r e a d ?
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
Magaluf, only booked the flight Friday night after finding out there was a spare place in one of the apartments. I was asked to go on the hen weekend months ago but did not know what obligations I would need to fulfill with my job so declined the offer...but now I'm going last minute and unexpectedly which makes it all the more exciting!
Have just looked up the hotel on the review pages, it's a bit like an 18-30's holiday accommodation....must say I have passed the 30 year mark but what the hell, I wont be the oldest!!
I was i Benidorm a month ago for a weekend but I thought it was a sh*thole! Posted by Rashaa (Member # 15206) on :
quote:Originally posted by young at heart: (God help you if they get their hands on your phone number) _________________________________________________ That's so typical, when we were first together, I miss dialled his number and spent the next few weeks fending off an Omar, followed by Omar's friend Mohamed
that will teach you to misdial hahahah sorry, I know the experience all too well.
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: im determined to get to page 30
1
a m
d e t e r m i n e d
t o
g e t
t o
p a g e
3 0 ,
b u t
i
m i g h t
h a v e
t o
d o
m o r e
t o m o r r o w .
w h e r e
i s
t h e
p o p c o r n
i n
t h i s
t h r e a d ?
.....don't think we are going to get there anytime soon, well not unless MH drops another bombshell! Posted by Rashaa (Member # 15206) on :
oh oh oh oh oh meee meeee meee meee I wanna drop a bompshell hahaha
I mean bombshell
can I???????????
:-)
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
go for it rashaa!!
Posted by young at heart (Member # 10365) on :
Advocate. Do you watch the series Benidorm. It is sooooooooooo certain types of Brits abroad!
Posted by Alchemist Cake Girl (Member # 12318) on :
That's right, everyone keep posting on this thread. There's a good ESer's. My precious. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
[QUOTE]Originally posted by advocate: Magaluf, only booked the flight Friday night after finding out there was a spare place in one of the apartments. I was asked to go on the hen weekend months ago but did not know what obligations I would need to fulfill with my job so declined the offer...but now I'm going last minute and unexpectedly which makes it all the more exciting!
Have just looked up the hotel on the review pages, it's a bit like an 18-30's holiday accommodation....must say I have passed the 30 year mark but what the hell, I wont be the oldest!!
I was i Benidorm a month ago for a weekend but I thought it was a sh*thole! [/QUOTever E] Never heard yet of Magaluf.Is it near coastal city of Benidorm?The Spain coastal cities i visit regularly are Barcelona,Gijon in Asturias,and the north of Galicia. Benidorm is not a place i would visit,really. N
Posted by Rashaa (Member # 15206) on :
I met someoneeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, well it was an introduction and rumour has it he likes me :-) .... and if it goes well, I owe my brother a very big gift :-).
He's a friend of my brothers, I met him a little while ago, and we have been talking...but he recently has expressed serious interest, and we are taking it from there.
that's it...just a little giddy =).
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Alchemist Cake Girl: That's right, everyone keep posting on this thread. There's a good ESer's. My precious.
This thread has become the gem-pukebucket of ES!!! Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rashaa: I met someoneeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, well it was an introduction and rumour has it he likes me :-) .... and if it goes well, I owe my brother a very big gift :-).
He's a friend of my brothers, I met him a little while ago, and we have been talking...but he recently has expressed serious interest, and we are taking it from there.
that's it...just a little giddy =).
Ok.,gonna do a MH here..... "i already have several marriage proposals...." Posted by Rashaa (Member # 15206) on :
*deleted*
Posted by Culture Club (Member # 13767) on :
There are some ethnic groups in Indonesia, and each ethnic has its own charecteristics. May I know in what part of Java he comes from?
Some ethnics, such as Javanese people is very strict to the customs, especially in selecting for "future wife/husband". As it is "Bibit, Bebet, Bobot (the status, family and social background is number one), but some of them do not so strict to this rule. And perhaps his family is in this part of modern Javanese people, and the parents sent the son to US for studying and has other American daughter in law. I think, they can receive MH as the way she is. But, MAYBE the parents WANT grandchildren of their son's blood.
MH, you must ask for dowery even for an Al Quran, clothes to pray, and a ring. Do not hesistate to ask more. It is common and it is your right as a bride. And it is good for you if you can have that wedding day with his family there.
Should be there any question, please PM me I am at your service.
Posted by Culture Club (Member # 13767) on :
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Culture Club: There are some ethnic groups in Indonesia, and each ethnic has its own charecteristics. May I know in what part of Java he comes from?
Some ethnics, such as Javanese people is very strict to the customs, especially in selecting for "future wife/husband". As it is "Bibit, Bebet, Bobot (the status, family and social background is number one), but some of them do not so strict to this rule. And perhaps his family is in this part of modern Javanese people, and the parents sent the son to US for studying and has other American daughter in law. I think, they can receive MH as the way she is. But, MAYBE the parents WANT grandchildren of their son's blood.
MH, you must ask for dowery even for an Al Quran, clothes to pray, and a ring. Do not hesistate to ask more. It is common and it is your right as a bride. And it is good for you if you can have that wedding day with his family there.
Should be there any question, please PM me I am at your service.
Don't worry, she will...and from what I hear she will constantly talk about herself herself herself and her issues, her problems and her life. She's quite the interesting gal. Makes you wonder what happened the last 3 or 4, doesn't it? Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Culture Club: As it is "Bibit, Bebet, Bobot (the status, family and social background is number one
Waylp, that rules out MH.
Neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeext!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by ?????: If I were in her shoes, I would have been out of here a long time ago, after all that comments... There is so much in her behaviour that I simply can't imagine, that it seems rather unbelievable. But what I find even more strange: What about HER family? They seem to go along in every step she makes...
I think at one time she said she was distancing herself from certain of them because they weren't supportive of her. I would say they would be the 'sane' group.
No, she won't stop commenting here because she's deathly afraid that if people stop talking about her situation that it will cease to be. Without something going on in her life she feels ordinary and boring and lonely. It's kind of sad really. Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
yet you keep coming back for more
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Who can stop!? Most of us also can't pass by a train wreck with out rubber-necking to see what happened. Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
well, it seems in this case, most necks have twisted all the way around, you know, like in the Exorcist!!!!
i got to the point the other day where i couldn't keep silent anymore...i think i only have about 5 posts on these whole 27 pages...but she never bothered to answer my questions (and no one else did either) so i gave up! i check every once in a while, but man, this **** makes my head spin!!!!
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
oh wow! it automatically edited my curse word ****! hehe...is that new? i never noticed it before!!! **** DAMN HELL ****
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
No, if you read back over what she says she selectively replies to certain things and in certain ways. Kind of makes you wonder if something someone said in the previous one or two pages how manipulative she is in how she responds isn't right on the money. She gives just enough to keep you questioning and coming back for more. Some think it can't be true, but sadly with the track record I fear it is. Can't wait to see what happens next in MysticGate... Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
OK, i guess damn and hell are acceptable
are we up to page 28 yet????
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: No, if you read back over what she says
NO EFFIN' WAY!!!! LOL!
well, maybe i'll ask again...
Mystic: in a previous thread you spoke about a woman who was pregnant with twins and was going to marry only for financial reasons...YOU said YOU thought this was a form of prostitution...
now that YOU are doing the SAME THING, what made you change your mind? or are you OK with being a prostitute?
what was the turning point for you? SERIOUSLY...what made you decide this is OK for you, but it wasn't for the 'other woman' you spoke of?
(please note: I, personally, do not consider a woman who does this a prostitute, i am merely using YOUR words.)
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
She won't respond, she would have to question herself too much. On that note, perhaps she got 'the idea' from this person?
Either way, to be honest, I don't think she really believes she is enterting into a marriage for financial stability. I think she is just telling herself (and others) that to avoid the 'love' issue. I personally think she is so deflated when it comes to men and their rejections of her (please don't tell us how you left the others, it's obvious) that she has resorted to actually trying to convince herself that if she leaves feelings out of it and is good and honest and decent he will grow to love her. Sure, I guess it could happen, but only if he's taking the marriage seriously. If she honestly believes that then I have to agree with something someone said about 15 pages ago, that she gets what she deserves. There is no way in hell this new venture can be anything more than opportunism at its finest. Not that there's anything wrong with that. If the guy told her, 'hey, I don't love you but I want citizenship, in return I'll be a good husband to you, support you and your children financially, be honest and faithful and open'...where is the harm if she's willing (other than her children being involved)? Fact is he won't do that because he's afraid she will run if he is that honest. Perhaps deep down she's afraid if she is too honest with herself she will lose again...she just doesn't understand that she will WIN. Again, can't see the forest for the trees.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dawn-Bev*: MH - when he wants his 'husbandly-rights-sex', are you just going to lie there and not feel revulsion?
I will try not to feel anything at all, i cant imagine feeling revulsion though, he isnt an unattractive man, the women at my work that he has met find him rather attractive and tell me i would be insane to not be with him.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: I went to college in Cow Hampshire and am curious as to how a Javanese man and his twin would have decided to settle in one of the whiteset most conservative unhospitable cold unfriendly places towards forigners in the US? If he is doing factory work in NH, then it is suckass miserable factory work. And he is NOT makign a good living, he is scratching one out, and has 10 white fat american rednecks who hate him for it. Javanese men aren't anything like Egyptian men, and Java is nowhere near the middle east. Do some freaking research for yourself here. Java is a MoFo POOR COUNTRY. And you are all excited because his parents gave their approval? Hell they'd let him marry a transsexual man if it meant he didnt have to go back to Java and sell satay on the street. Thier approval doesn't serve as a stamp of "good girl" or "good woman". In fact it doesn't even freaking MATTER!
You think Arabs are all dying to come to America, and now that you haven't managed to find one in the past 4 dating cycles that can relocate, now you are fishing in a closer lake? Forigners who are unwed in America? 8 years is a long time for a good man to stay single.. wonder what his REAL issues are, and how long till they surface? I have to ask, is the only qualifying factor for you religion? Because you don't seem to have even a SHORT LIST of qualities you desire in a partner.
MH, all of "this" this entire body of work you are writing about your trials and tribulations is just so regrettable. I wish I'd never had to think about your screwball situation, or your desparation, or your kids, or your dying ex-husband in the yard, or your broken down house in the middle of nowhere. I don't care anymore if you are going to be happy, and frankly I don't give a crap about your kids. If I was your teenage daughter I wouldn't even want to go on a one night vacation in the next city over, because you are a hijab wearing slut and apparantly all it takes to open your legs is a whiff of marriage, or the premise of allah. I certain that you are a complete embarassment to those girls and they mark the days until you go on your next "marriage mission". Because when you aren't there, they don't have to deal with te idea that you DATE AND MARRY MEN FROM THE INTERNET THAT LIVE IN FORIGEN COUNTRIES. (ho now Doodle, you haven't torn through 3/4 men, you don't qualify) I can hear it now, "Hey Angela you want to get together this weekend?" "Sure Jeremy my Mom is going to Egypt to try and get this dude to move here, and get this, he doesn't even read and write english, you should see her preening on webcam, it's so gross, and she thinks its so cute". "You mean your Mom dates off the webcam?" "Dude, my mom gets MARRIED off the webcam!" "So can we have sex at your house when she is gone?"
You have some foul need to justify your expensive habit of screwing men overseas by marrying them. Save yourself some trouble and at least admit what you are doing, and respect yourself for it. Plenty of sexual predators out there, and you are one of them. You think your american muslim blue eyed self is going to prove so irresistable that any dark eyed man is going to bend over backwards to get at you. You.. used goods. Green card or not, if my son was looking to marry a woman who had just gone through the STUPID SELF INFLICTED ordeal you just went through LAST MONTH, I'd kick him in his brown ass. AND I AM A NICE PERSON!
I think you are ridiculously uneducated and perhaps even a little bit towards the "low end of normal". You are living proof that even simpletons can use the internet. Cast your net wide my dear, because you are going to need that one specific fish, one that is kind enough not to look at you like a freaking Lucky Irish Leprechaun and take advantage of your inability to manage your emotional affairs, you will accept ANYTHING that swims by, just as long as they see the true suffereing victim that you have been made into. And heads up MH, THEY DONT CARE EITHER. You said that your new dude rejected a girl from home because she had been sexually active before him.. you don't think that the argument you are having here over your iddah makes you seem a little whorey? Why would he take YOU over HER? You are bickering technical issues on when you last laid with a HUSBAND, and he threw a girl out on principal?
GAH! Go get married AGAIN and get so busy praying and living the godly life that I never hear of you again!!
correction to your information as you perceived it, he hasnt been single for 8 years, he was engaged to the girl back home until a year ago, they were together for a total of 11 years, 7 of which he was here and working on her coming as well, until he found out she was sleeping around back home behind his back.. she cheated on him that is why he left her. He resides in Portsmouth and there are alot of indonesian people there, i met at least 10 that are his friends and the factory he works in is mostly indonesian people. I do not compare him to any Arab, dont want him to be the same as them. I never thought arabs were dying to come to usa, i always felt guilty that i couldnt move to egypt instead of them moving here, i wanted them to remain in egypt and me come to them, it just wasnt possible, so they were going to have to come to me.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart:
quote:Originally posted by Dawn-Bev*: MH - when he wants his 'husbandly-rights-sex', are you just going to lie there and not feel revulsion?
I will try not to feel anything at all, i cant imagine feeling revulsion though, he isnt an unattractive man, the women at my work that he has met find him rather attractive and tell me i would be insane to not be with him.
Hate to be the one to break this to you, but sex for a woman has little to do with visuals. Stop thinking like a man.
Women have to have emotional connections, affection, respect, tenderness and softness. You're banking on the fact that he will give this to you...but how? When he doesn't produce you will still have to. You might feel repulsed when you realize that what you have done is sell yourself, then it won't matter what he looks like. BTW men don't like to be used for money anymore than women like to be used for nationality. The fact that you're both willing to do this says a lot, and it isn't good.
The women at your work telling you that you would be insane NOT to be with him, trust me, they aren't your friends. They are laughing at you behind your back and find your life equally as sad but entertaining as most of us here do. You are the joke of the day at work, I'm sure of this. Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by walkingathinline:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: No, if you read back over what she says
NO EFFIN' WAY!!!! LOL!
well, maybe i'll ask again...
Mystic: in a previous thread you spoke about a woman who was pregnant with twins and was going to marry only for financial reasons...YOU said YOU thought this was a form of prostitution...
now that YOU are doing the SAME THING, what made you change your mind? or are you OK with being a prostitute?
what was the turning point for you? SERIOUSLY...what made you decide this is OK for you, but it wasn't for the 'other woman' you spoke of?
(please note: I, personally, do not consider a woman who does this a prostitute, i am merely using YOUR words.)
I wont bother to go back and find my exact words, but yes, my first impression was that she would be no more than a legal prostitute, but i was thinking all the while what her reasons for this are, and actually realized that any marriage is just a legalized prostitution, love or not, you give them sex, they give you things in return. But also i read more and more in Quran on marriage and islamic sites on marriage and love isnt included really, gentleness, respect,and providing for each other yes, but not love persay. So with further consideration, and seeing how the love thing seems to cloud things up and make a mess of things, the marriage based on each persons needs and wants seems better since the decision isnt based on emotion, its based on consideration of what each can provide for the other. by the way, that woman did marry him and she is actually quite happy with the arrangement, he treats her very well.
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart:
quote:Originally posted by walkingathinline:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: No, if you read back over what she says
NO EFFIN' WAY!!!! LOL!
well, maybe i'll ask again...
Mystic: in a previous thread you spoke about a woman who was pregnant with twins and was going to marry only for financial reasons...YOU said YOU thought this was a form of prostitution...
now that YOU are doing the SAME THING, what made you change your mind? or are you OK with being a prostitute?
what was the turning point for you? SERIOUSLY...what made you decide this is OK for you, but it wasn't for the 'other woman' you spoke of?
(please note: I, personally, do not consider a woman who does this a prostitute, i am merely using YOUR words.)
I wont bother to go back and find my exact words, but yes, my first impression was that she would be no more than a legal prostitute, but i was thinking all the while what her reasons for this are, and actually realized that any marriage is just a legalized prostitution, love or not, you give them sex, they give you things in return.
Poor Mystic. Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by Culture Club: There are some ethnic groups in Indonesia, and each ethnic has its own charecteristics. May I know in what part of Java he comes from?
Some ethnics, such as Javanese people is very strict to the customs, especially in selecting for "future wife/husband". As it is "Bibit, Bebet, Bobot (the status, family and social background is number one), but some of them do not so strict to this rule. And perhaps his family is in this part of modern Javanese people, and the parents sent the son to US for studying and has other American daughter in law. I think, they can receive MH as the way she is. But, MAYBE the parents WANT grandchildren of their son's blood.
MH, you must ask for dowery even for an Al Quran, clothes to pray, and a ring. Do not hesistate to ask more. It is common and it is your right as a bride. And it is good for you if you can have that wedding day with his family there.
Should be there any question, please PM me I am at your service.
His father is gone now for several years. His mother seems very nice from what i have spoken with her and i have talked with his sister in law there in new hampshire at length about her visits to the family and how they are with her. His mom has asked if i will love her as his sister in law does, i thought that cute. I dont know much about his culture true enough, am trying to learn, such as the saying of mas and sayang? I ask about his culture and he says he will teach me anything and everything but that we live here and go by this culture not that one. I feel too guilty to require an alloted amount of money should he divorce me as he has spent so much already on me, no i didnt ask him to he insisted but still, altogether with his trip here and mine there he has spent 2 months of my income. I already have praying clothes so that is not necessary and he is waiting on his sister to send us pictures of rings from indonesia cause he wants to order them from there, He wants to pay for any repair needed to my home and has suggested that i dont work so much and go to college instead for anything, i am not sure about college but i might take him up on not working so much and attending classes at the ISNA headquarters, and perhaps i will find a course on the indonesian language.Momma,(his) has already asked him when she can expect grandbabies from us. I asked him if she didnt want him to return home to her to live, he says no, while she misses him that she knows he is happy here. He does wish to move back after some years, the agreement has been set to see how things are once my children are grown there and then possibly move back. He wishes to move to Lombok, which is where we would spend most of our visit to when we go, other than when we see his family. I am not sure the exact place in Java he comes from, i will have to ask him.
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
While the area may be considered economically depressed by First World standards, the island is fertile, has sufficient rainfall in most areas for agriculture, and possesses a variety of climate zones. Consequently, food in abundant quantity and variety is available inexpensively at local farmer's markets. A family of 4 can eat rice, vegetables, and fruit for as little as US$0.50. Even though a family income may be as small as US$1.00 per day from fishing or farming, many families are able to live a happy and productive live on astonishingly small incomes. _________________________________
Hey, MH, looks like he can afford to support the family back home just fine on a factory worker's wage. A dollar a day? Cheap and easy.
Posted by Sic Luceat Lux (Member # 12020) on :
Wow, you people sure do love giving advice
~Alistair
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sic Luceat Lux: Wow, you people sure do love giving advice
~Alistair
Alistair!! Where have you been!?? What advice can you give to the infamous MH ? Please tell her SOMETHING....
Posted by advocate (Member # 13367) on :
Just a thought, if MH marries this other man will than mean she will move forums to his Nationality? PLease God say yes!!! Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by advocate: Just a thought, if MH marries this other man will than mean she will move forums to his Nationality? PLease God say yes!!!
Advocate, I am still waiting to get YOUR opinion, as it relates to your job, as to what her children are probably going through. Are we all over reacting as it relates to her children's well being and her romantic escapades (for lack of a better word)?
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by advocate: Just a thought, if MH marries this other man will than mean she will move forums to his Nationality? PLease God say yes!!!
Don't wish so soon - she ain't married yet! Posted by Sic Luceat Lux (Member # 12020) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Alistair!! Where have you been!?? What advice can you give to the infamous MH ? Please tell her SOMETHING....
I can't tell her anything she hasn't heard a billion times before
I do think she enjoys the attention though...even if most of it is negative.
Just PM'd you btw..
~Alistair
Posted by newcomer (Member # 1056) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: I dont know much about his culture true enough, am trying to learn, such as the saying of mas and sayang?
..He wishes to move to Lombok, which is where we would spend most of our visit to when we go, other than when we see his family. I am not sure the exact place in Java he comes from, i will have to ask him.
Interesting first words "gold" and "love"
Lombok...the Hurghada of Indonesia! Huge tourist resorts suddenly plonked on a island that was totally underdeveloped and relied on subsistence farming, with all the disastrous resultant socio-economic effects that has, including local gigolos Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Ahhh the sweet smell of inevitability...
Posted by Dalia* (Member # 10593) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: any marriage is just a legalized prostitution, love or not, you give them sex, they give you things in return.
You might not believe it, but some women actually love sex and don't see it as something they *give* to someone in order to get something else in return.
Posted by Tibe-at-work (Member # 14907) on :
quote:Originally posted by advocate: Just a thought, if MH marries this other man will than mean she will move forums to his Nationality? PLease God say yes!!!
And maybe change her religion again.... This is really getting weird and crazy. How hungry for love can one person be.....? MH please think of the effect this will have on your children. My advice : Dumb your lovehormons and focus on raising your kids for the next couple of years. Happiness is not depending on having a man in your life.
Posted by ????? (Member # 12336) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dalia*:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: any marriage is just a legalized prostitution, love or not, you give them sex, they give you things in return.
You might not believe it, but some women actually love sex and don't see it as something they *give* to someone in order to get something else in return.
Of course it's the way they look at it. If she sees it as a service, she likes to be payed for it. 24/7 at your service, sir... Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
Mystic, please tell us you are still suffering from the break-up because that's the only plausible reason for all the junk you've written since then...
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Mystic doesn't care about her kids. Look at everything she's done/said so far.
First, why would such a wonderful practicing covering, praying, and fasting Muslimah allow her daughter to be galloping around with boyfriends? Of course the daughter doesn't care about the promised trip to Egypt, she knows her mother is flaky and at her young age is already taken with the boys to replace what she isn't getting at home...or where ever she is this week.
Anyone notice how she has the most wonderful mother in law to be, again?? Momens mother apparently was so wonderful and 'loved her like a daughter' and yet at the end it was either Mystic or momma...darn it. Once again, Mystic has hit the jackpot with the mother in law...and yes both speak/spoke English enough for her to understand everything. Not.
Not sure what you are thinking Mystic, but as soon as you allow this man into your home, for how ever long he stays, you're going to have a crude and rude awakening.
BTW, Dalia is right, many of us, especially Western women don't view sex as a job, another task alongside doing laundry or cooking MASTER his supper...which is what you will have, a MASTER you have to take care of and service. It's one thing for people within a culture who view marriage without love as normal to enter into it that way, but once again you are trying to shed your feelings of bordeom of your own self for that of another. Unfortunately what you're trading into is something you CANNOT handle. You only THINK (or want to think) that you can handle marrying for anything but love, but once the novelty wears off you will still be stuck with the same old boring Mystic, except you will have MASTER sweating all over you at night as he leaves the 5 bucks up on the nightstand for you to 'splurge with' the next day. Yea, that's SOOO Islamic.
In the end, it is your choice but the thing that just annoys the hell out of me is that you have NO CLUE what it does to your children. You don't know and you don't care...just as long as you can continue to tell yourself what a wonderful mother you are to them, take them to IHOP once a month and let them choose 'ANYTHING OFF THE MENU'. You really need to take some parental classes, seriously! Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dalia*:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: any marriage is just a legalized prostitution, love or not, you give them sex, they give you things in return.
You might not believe it, but some women actually love sex and don't see it as something they *give* to someone in order to get something else in return.
Thank you Dalia. Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
The people that waste their time reading and replying to her are no less insane than they say she is...
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vader: The people that waste their time reading and replying to her are no less insane than they say she is...
I can't help but think about the public figures who protest against something or someone and privately they are doing the same thing. Wasn't it Newt Gingrich who was persecuting Clinton and at the same time having an affair and left his wife sick with cancer in the hospital? what about David Vitter who promoted "family values" while doing prostitutes. Then there was Mark Foley one of the foremost opponents of child pornography who was soliciting young boys. Don't forget about the Catholic priest and the list can go on and on.
I know these are extreme examples. The point I am trying to make is that we all have made mistakes. Giving someone your opinion is one thing but for any of us to feel that we are holy enough to be judge, jury, and then to carry out the punishment is totally another. Not that everyone is doing that but many post go over the top with sarcasim, and name calling.
I am not saying that I agree with what MH is doing. I just don't feel so certain as some that belittling another person is the high road either.
Posted by cloudberry (Member # 11163) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: She won't respond, she would have to question herself too much.
There have been many good questions but she never answers them all. Makes you wonder why...perhaps just the reason you said, she would have to think too much who she is and what she is doing?
This is like a bad (or good ) soap opera...not only I feel sorry for her but her future (and ex husbands) and CHILDREN - she is exposing half her life here and photos too. I would have hated my mom do this Or if my other half were doing this.
Posted by Alchemist Cake Girl (Member # 12318) on :
*Alchemist singing* "You take the high road and I'll take the low road, and I'll be in Ireland afore ye"
BTW, it was Rush Limbaugh. That douchebag.
Posted by cloudberry (Member # 11163) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: , and actually realized that any marriage is just a legalized prostitution, love or not, you give them sex, they give you things in return.
Poor Mystic. [/QB]
Yes, really sad. If you give people (spouses) something that's always prostitution...wow. I guess I have to stop giving anything I sure don't wish to be a prostitute Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Alchemist Cake Girl: *Alchemist singing* "You take the high road and I'll take the low road, and I'll be in Ireland afore ye"
BTW, it was Rush Limbaugh. That douchebag.
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: The point I am trying to make is that we all have made mistakes.
You are absolutely correct, we all DO make mistakes.
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: Giving someone your opinion is one thing but for any of us to feel that we are holy enough to be judge, jury, and then to carry out the punishment is totally another.
So does this mean I shouldn't say what I really feel, that being I suspect what we've seen in MH's behavior is really exhibitionism of a twisted fetish? Or no, because that might hurt someone's feelings?
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: Not that everyone is doing that but many post go over the top with sarcasim, and name calling.
People communicate their thoughts and ideas different ways. Just because we wouldn't say something ourselves does not give us the right to censor the discussion of others. We are all quite capable of not reading this particular thread.
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: [QUOTE] I am not saying that I agree with what MH is doing.
Really? And, in your opinion, just what is it she's doing?
quote:Originally posted by of_gold: I just don't feel so certain as some that belittling another person is the high road either.
When you put what you're doing out into the public, particularly on an internet message board, you are then subject to what anyone who knows how to use the "Add Reply" feature has to say. THAT is life.
I'm not picking on you. Really, I'm not. But if you're going to defend someone, put on your defense.
Posted by Lumos (Member # 14589) on :
quote:Originally posted by Alchemist Cake Girl: *Alchemist singing* "You take the high road and I'll take the low road, and I'll be in Ireland afore ye"
BTW, it was Rush Limbaugh. That douchebag.
Ireland?
This thread is nuts. I'm only here for the cake.
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote: I can't help but think about the public figures who protest against something or someone and privately they are doing the same thing.
You left this out JV...
What, are you feeling offended because I said what I think?
Don't worry, I don't have any power to censor. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Sorry to say but it's almost impossible to NOT take the high road in this situation. I still hold out hope that just before she says 'I do' she'll think about something said here, go home to her kids and take them on vacation. I still do hold out hope...I think most people here would applaud her and give her lots of support~
Posted by of_gold (Member # 13418) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I still hold out hope that just before she says 'I do' she'll think about something said here, go home to her kids and take them on vacation. I still do hold out hope...I think most people here would applaud her and give her lots of support~
Me too Smuckers. Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
MH We don't care about you or about your future husband! and we don't want to hear about your personal life anymore!!
I am starting to see you and your husband in my dreams or shall i say nightmares!! We are all sick of you and your husband and women like you! Leave us alone this forum is called ES not MHS!!
Go live your life the way you want, and before logging on to ES try to put your personal life aside and talk about anything.
If you don't have anything to say, then just read what others have to say, you don't have to post every time you log on!
UFF!!
Posted by Lumos (Member # 14589) on :
Don't have nightmares, YEG. By the end of the year, at this rate, MH could have a few more husbands. The next ones may be better, richer, kinder, nicer, smarter, sexier, funnier and more honest.
Posted by foreignluvr (Member # 5854) on :
The only thing I can say about this whole thing, and I have not posted in this thread until now is first, I could never, ever marry for anything but love. BUT if I did marry for security & financial gain you can be damn sure I would not marry a foreign factory worker. I would want BIG BUCKS!!! New home, new car, all the best for my son, jewelry and every damn thing else I could get my hands on that cost money. And I would for sure protect myself and ask for a large sum of money if divorce occurred. No way would I ever even consider an arrangement of that sort, but damn, Mystic do you really think you are getting security & financial support from a factory worker????
That's just plain stupid what you are doing girl. I really always thought you were better than this.. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<this forum is called ES not MHS!!>
ROFL Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Of course it makes no sense Foreignluvr, which is why most of us are pulling our hair out. Worst thing is there are already children from a PREVIOUS marriage involved. MH once said she always puts her children first...I would hate to see how she treats someone she puts last. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Lumos: Don't have nightmares, YEG. By the end of the year, at this rate, MH could have a few more husbands. The next ones may be better, richer, kinder, nicer, smarter, sexier, funnier and more honest.
.....or from anywhere near the Galapagos or Marchesas archipielago Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
We should make a wager, the one to guess the correct continent the NEXT guy is from wins. Not sure what is won...but you know.
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8: <this forum is called ES not MHS!!>
ROFL
LOL Glad you like that but I can do better, try me. Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy:
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8: <this forum is called ES not MHS!!>
ROFL
LOL Glad you like that but I can do better, try me.
Huh? Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by of_gold:
quote: I can't help but think about the public figures who protest against something or someone and privately they are doing the same thing.
You left this out JV...
What, are you feeling offended because I said what I think?
Don't worry, I don't have any power to censor.
I did leave that out, and I did it on purpose because I don't like to reef on the depth of someone's religion.
However, as you pointed out, there are certainly child molesters among Catholic priests. Just like there are molesters who enter the teaching profession to have access to their victims. Coaches and scout leaders - same thing. They're doing what they feel like they have to do to get close to the one they'll abuse.
And I believe that's what MH is doing. She's got a fetish and she finds what she's looking for in foreign men, specifically foreign Muslim men.
Take a look at her own description of her unfolding relation (as she calls them) with her new dude. He offers, she decides whether she will accept his offer. She believes, somehow, she has that much control because, as she continually says, over and over, she has far more to offer then any of her potential husbands. But what does she really have to offer? Nothing - except legal status and, of course, sex. It's classic predator and prey.
Have you offended me? No. You haven't. I'm a pretty tough girl and it takes a whole lot more than questioning my position to offend me.
What is offensive, however, is how stupid MH appears to believe everyone else is.
Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
If she is really smart, she will get Java man to pay for those repairs on her house as fast as she can, and then get at least one more trip out of him, and then break it off.
She hasn't figured out that she doens't have to get married to profit off her looks and her savvy with the internet.
It's ok to just have a period in your life where you are getting what you need from people without having to actually COMMIT yourself. You have already figured out how to sift through the miasma of the internet to find single guys. WTF lady.. why not just play the field and keep your mouth shut about it. Nobody is confusign you for a chaste virgin or a naieve uncalculating woman.
SO go out, gather your victims.. I mean dates. Get soem free travel in, get soem work done on your house, have good time in the name of YOU, and then get back to chasing a relationship. Because I am sorry to say this to you so late in the game, but you CAN have sex without being married to the guy, and it doesn't make you a whore. But offereing sex as a bartering tool for a LIFETIME of supposed financial support kidonf does.
Plus, you gain more if you are takign money from multiple men versus settlign for a poor factory guy from an Isand in the Pacific. Think of all the tech geeks waiting for you!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
ya mystics man is quite attractive!! not my type but hes cute!! they do look good togeather though!
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
Tina, i am so worried that this man might be you! seems you are having an affair with MH! come clean woman just say what's between the two of you! you are always supporting her whether she is right or wrong, but she was never right so you always support her even when she is wrong! isnt that weird!! i bet there is something going on between the two of you!
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal: ya mystics man is quite attractive!! not my type but hes cute!! they do look good togeather though!
Which one,i mean which one of the massacre trail of men on her list,and learned about them thru this same board ????
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
Sashyra8
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: Tina, i am so worried that this man might be you! seems you are having an affair with MH! come clean woman just say what's between the two of you! you are always supporting her whether she is right or wrong, but she was never right so you always support her even when she is wrong! isnt that weird!! i bet there is something going on between the two of you!
Double ROFL,YoungEgyptianGuy! Posted by happy in love (Member # 12547) on :
I could only marry for love. Money wouldnt matter, just the love of a good woman is all i need.
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: MH We don't care about you or about your future husband! and we don't want to hear about your personal life anymore!!
I am starting to see you and your husband in my dreams or shall i say nightmares!! We are all sick of you and your husband and women like you! Leave us alone this forum is called ES not MHS!!
Go live your life the way you want, and before logging on to ES try to put your personal life aside and talk about anything.
If you don't have anything to say, then just read what others have to say, you don't have to post every time you log on!
UFF!!
I agree with this, I officially no longer care what she does. I am now of the opinion that she is actually one of the most self absorbed people I have ever come across. All I can hear is me, me, me, me, me like he is snapping up this wonderful, nice, perfect muslimah because she is such a catch. I think Mystic actually rates herself higher than we all think, this is attention seeking behaviour at its absolute best. She knows exactly what she is doing, so go ahead, get married to this or the next bloke you bump into in the street, because I'm sure he wont be able to resist your lovliness.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: Sashyra8
*still ROFLing uproariously across the board at your comment and unable to stop*
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8:
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: Tina, i am so worried that this man might be you! seems you are having an affair with MH! come clean woman just say what's between the two of you! you are always supporting her whether she is right or wrong, but she was never right so you always support her even when she is wrong! isnt that weird!! i bet there is something going on between the two of you!
Double ROFL,YoungEgyptianGuy!
See, I told ya i can do better, just try me have a nice day woman, glad to put a smile on your lovely face Sashyra8 Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: Tina, i am so worried that this man might be you! seems you are having an affair with MH! come clean woman just say what's between the two of you! you are always supporting her whether she is right or wrong, but she was never right so you always support her even when she is wrong! isnt that weird!! i bet there is something going on between the two of you!
u might be a fag!! but i aint a lesbo!! i support her cas its not my place to say shes wrong!! she is a grown woman she will do what she wants wethere is say its good or bad!! so as a friend ya i will support her!! thats what friends do!!! hes a real man not fake i have seen the pic! but the next time u feel froggy callin me a lesbon in a round about way!! check ur own shi t yr the fag! ur egyptian and maybne u try to hide it cas u dont wanna go to jail!!!! come to usa they are all out of the closet here!!! u can find yrself a white or black american boyfriend!!!!
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy:
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8:
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: Tina, i am so worried that this man might be you! seems you are having an affair with MH! come clean woman just say what's between the two of you! you are always supporting her whether she is right or wrong, but she was never right so you always support her even when she is wrong! isnt that weird!! i bet there is something going on between the two of you!
Double ROFL,YoungEgyptianGuy!
See, I told ya i can do better, just try me have a nice day woman, glad to put a smile on your lovely face Sashyra8
*finally takes a breath and pulls herself together*
Posted by Snidely Whiplash (Member # 15126) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.:
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: MH We don't care about you or about your future husband! and we don't want to hear about your personal life anymore!!
I am starting to see you and your husband in my dreams or shall i say nightmares!! We are all sick of you and your husband and women like you! Leave us alone this forum is called ES not MHS!!
Go live your life the way you want, and before logging on to ES try to put your personal life aside and talk about anything.
If you don't have anything to say, then just read what others have to say, you don't have to post every time you log on!
UFF!!
I agree with this, I officially no longer care what she does. I am now of the opinion that she is actually one of the most self absorbed people I have ever come across. All I can hear is me, me, me, me, me like he is snapping up this wonderful, nice, perfect muslimah because she is such a catch. I think Mystic actually rates herself higher than we all think, this is attention seeking behaviour at its absolute best. She knows exactly what she is doing, so go ahead, get married to this or the next bloke you bump into in the street, because I'm sure he wont be able to resist your lovliness.
she think she is very cute but she is not did u see her photo in the picture thread? she aint ugly but damn she has a lazy eye and she looks 3 shades too light like she didnt eat for weeks no boobs and no not much figure more like a 11 year old boy with long hair puke Posted by yorkshire rose (Member # 12072) on :
Omg thats a bit hard.
Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
I've too passed the point of caring and frustration (now that I can see the pattern of manipulation in mystic and her sick need for attention).
So to feed the beast, let me bring up something that I've been chuckling at... just WHAT must Momen be saying to his friends right now at the idea of Mystic with an Indonesian man?
Generally, Egyptians who haven't traveled much outside of Egypt (like Momen) tend to adapt the racial stereotyping from the Gulf countries in regards to Asians - the "filipino maids" and dismiss them as lower class than themselves.
Does Mystic realize that in Momen's eyes she went from a Porshe to a Fiat?
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal:
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: Tina, i am so worried that this man might be you! seems you are having an affair with MH! come clean woman just say what's between the two of you! you are always supporting her whether she is right or wrong, but she was never right so you always support her even when she is wrong! isnt that weird!! i bet there is something going on between the two of you!
u might be a fag!! but i aint a lesbo!! i support her cas its not my place to say shes wrong!! she is a grown woman she will do what she wants wethere is say its good or bad!! so as a friend ya i will support her!! thats what friends do!!! hes a real man not fake i have seen the pic! but the next time u feel froggy callin me a lesbon in a round about way!! check ur own shi t yr the fag! ur egyptian and maybne u try to hide it cas u dont wanna go to jail!!!! come to usa they are all out of the closet here!!! u can find yrself a white or black american boyfriend!!!!
And the story goes on and probably it will go on forever, She will keep defending her till the end of time!! One day we will all read about this affair in the press or see both of them in jerry springer show! or maybe dr.phill! They wont be able to hide it anymore then. All of us will be screaming in front of the tv "my gosh i know this woman and that woman too!"
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8:
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy:
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8:
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: Tina, i am so worried that this man might be you! seems you are having an affair with MH! come clean woman just say what's between the two of you! you are always supporting her whether she is right or wrong, but she was never right so you always support her even when she is wrong! isnt that weird!! i bet there is something going on between the two of you!
Double ROFL,YoungEgyptianGuy!
See, I told ya i can do better, just try me have a nice day woman, glad to put a smile on your lovely face Sashyra8
*finally takes a breath and pulls herself together*
When you're smilin'....keep on smilin' The whole world smiles with you And when you're laughin'....keep on laughin' The sun comes shinin' through
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: [QUOTE]Originally posted by tina kamal: [qb] [QUOTE]Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: [qb] Tina, i bet there is something going on between the two of you!
i wounder if u have any friends???? doubt it!!!!
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI: I've too passed the point of caring and frustration (now that I can see the pattern of manipulation in mystic and her sick need for attention).
So to feed the beast, let me bring up something that I've been chuckling at... just WHAT must Momen be saying to his friends right now at the idea of Mystic with an Indonesian man?
Generally, Egyptians who haven't traveled much outside of Egypt (like Momen) tend to adapt the racial stereotyping from the Gulf countries in regards to Asians - the "filipino maids" and dismiss them as lower class than themselves.
Does Mystic realize that in Momen's eyes she went from a Porshe to a Fiat?
Not only that but he will also know that he meant absolutely nothing to her at all, he wasn't 'special' or the 'love of her life' he was just another pawn in the 'everyone love me' saga. I'm beginning to see why he broke it off.
And whats more she has fed into the western women stereotype, that western women are just cheap and will have sex with anyone. Even for money. That we are shallow, manipulative and love ourselves.
(I dont btw)
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal:
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: [QUOTE]Originally posted by tina kamal: [qb] [QUOTE]Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: [qb] Tina, i bet there is something going on between the two of you!
i wounder if u have any friends???? doubt it!!!!
look who is talking!
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy:
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal:
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: [QUOTE]Originally posted by tina kamal: [qb] [QUOTE]Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: [qb] Tina, i bet there is something going on between the two of you!
i wounder if u have any friends???? doubt it!!!!
look who is talking!
i have plenty of friends offline and on!!!
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
almost to 30 pages! woo hoo! keep it going everyone! LOL
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<another pawn in the 'everyone love me' saga>
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.:
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI: I've too passed the point of caring and frustration (now that I can see the pattern of manipulation in mystic and her sick need for attention).
So to feed the beast, let me bring up something that I've been chuckling at... just WHAT must Momen be saying to his friends right now at the idea of Mystic with an Indonesian man?
Generally, Egyptians who haven't traveled much outside of Egypt (like Momen) tend to adapt the racial stereotyping from the Gulf countries in regards to Asians - the "filipino maids" and dismiss them as lower class than themselves.
Does Mystic realize that in Momen's eyes she went from a Porshe to a Fiat?
Not only that but he will also know that he meant absolutely nothing to her at all, he wasn't 'special' or the 'love of her life' he was just another pawn in the 'everyone love me' saga. I'm beginning to see why he broke it off.
More and more people are joining that club. I'm beginning to see the one who ended up with the best deal might have been Momen after all. Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI: So to feed the beast, let me bring up something that I've been chuckling at... just WHAT must Momen be saying to his friends right now at the idea of Mystic with an Indonesian man?
I'm pretty sure he saw through her a long, long time ago and MH trolling the internet looking for her next exotic import shouldn't surprise him at all.
Big high five to Momen for not trading his dignity and self-respect for a Green Card! Woo hoo!
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
absolutely. I can just hear the conversations now:
Momen: I couldn't call you tonight because...
MH: I dont have to put up with this, I've had 5 offers of marriage tonight already.
Momen: But I had to work late...
MH: A good muslimah like myself deserves better Momen.
Momen: And then I had to check in on my mum.
MH: I am a nice person, I am beautiful, I pray and fast and I could get married next week you know, I dont have to wait around for you.
Momen: And when I tried to call you it was engaged.
MH: Thats because my male friends were calling me.
Momen: I see
MH: So do you love me as much as everyone else does? I need to know, someone is waiting on the phone for an answer.
Momen: nevermind...
MH: Hang on, I'm not finished, have I told you how good a parent I am, in the last five minutes? Momen...Momen... How dare you do this to me, I am a nice person, don't you know that! you have messed me about now, you bad man.
Posted by VanillaBullshit (Member # 10873) on :
Somebody gouge my eyeballs out with a rusty screwdriver.
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
I'm sure MH will do it if you pay her enough
Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
Now, now ladies, let's be fair... Momen is and was an ES tigallo and was chasing after any and every female online before Mystic fell for it. I'm sure he's learned his lesson and will from now on stick to seducing western tourists on holidays and the true-and-tried "i miss you sooooo much" texts with a bit of facebook flirting thrown in.
At least now other internet tigallos will hear of his misfortunate tale of the Mystic psycho and they'll realize that sometimes the hunter becomes the hunted, and you neeeeever DO know what the person behind that webcam will eventually turn out to be when true colors are revealed!
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.: absolutely. I can just hear the conversations now:
Momen: I couldn't call you tonight because...
MH: I dont have to put up with this, I've had 5 offers of marriage tonight already.
Momen: But I had to work late...
MH: A good muslimah like myself deserves better Momen.
Momen: And then I had to check in on my mum.
MH: I am a nice person, I am beautiful, I pray and fast and I could get married next week you know, I dont have to wait around for you.
Momen: And when I tried to call you it was engaged.
MH: Thats because my male friends were calling me.
Momen: I see
MH: So do you love me as much as everyone else does? I need to know, someone is waiting on the phone for an answer.
Momen: nevermind...
MH: Hang on, I'm not finished, have I told you how good a parent I am, in the last five minutes? Momen...Momen... How dare you do this to me, I am a nice person, don't you know that! you have messed me about now, you bad man.
ROOOOOOFFFFLLLL
Please,guys.You two,Mrs. and YoungEgyptianGuy are cracking me up in laughter,almost in tears by now! Posted by Rashaa (Member # 15206) on :
I
w a n t
t o
s e e
t h e
t h r e a d
g o
t o
3 0
p a g e s
w i l l
i
b e
s o
l u c k y
t o
s e e
t h a t
??????????????????????????????????????????
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
p l e a s e
l e t
t h i s
b e
p a g e
3 0
a n d
t h e n
w e
c a n
h a v e
c a k e !
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
Of course you will Rashaa, in the next five minutes MH would have been out shopping with Mr Indonesia, she will be pregnant and have to go through a quickie marriage tomorow. Momen will have flown out to America to be with her as he hasn't been able to Eat since they parted company and Mystic will be buying her tickets to Indonesia by the end of the week. One of Mr good looking indonesias family has already moved in MH's house to babysit the kids 24/7 while MH goes to work in Indonesia, despite the 32 million unemployed.
Momen, with all the other heart broken boyfriends will, of course, follow her to indonesia to pine outside her window.
While Mr Indonesia sets MH to work on his needs she will discover his desire for cross dressing (but do not fear, she will be back to tell us every step). The wonderful, so close, known her for years mother in law will cut the cables for the internet as she will need MH to be peeling the veg.
Ahhh, domestic bliss awaits.
Posted by Lumos (Member # 14589) on :
Almost page 30? Watch out for the wrath of Alchemist. Posted by Alchemist Cake Girl (Member # 12318) on :
Did someone say cake? Oh god we are almost there people!!
Smucky I expect my cake on July the 8th, it's my birthday. I like Oreo cake, thanks luv ya, bye.
T H I R T Y
P A G E S
N O W ! !
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
<Momen, with all the other heart broken boyfriends>
You forgot the "wonderful" MH adjective to former boyfriends. Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
well lets finish this thread for her cake
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I can't see through the tears! Posted by Shanta Qadeema (Member # 9889) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I can't see through the tears!
*wiping Smuckers laughing tears,along with her own so they can continue reading*
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
tears of joy smucks??
must be page 30 now!!
Posted by Alchemist Cake Girl (Member # 12318) on :
quote:Originally posted by Lumos:
quote:Originally posted by Alchemist Cake Girl: *Alchemist singing* "You take the high road and I'll take the low road, and I'll be in Ireland afore ye"
BTW, it was Rush Limbaugh. That douchebag.
Ireland?
This thread is nuts. I'm only here for the cake.
OK, OK Scotland then.
Are you trying to steal my oreo cake??? Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: tears of joy smucks??
must be page 30 now!!
Almost,Ayisha....pussh...pushhhhhh! Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
Its close guys!!
*runs to kitchen to make cake* *sets out nibbles on tray* *calls KFC, MacDonalds, Pizza Hut and Snack Time* *throws lemons in mixer* *lights candles* *blows up balloons*
are we there yet???
Posted by Shanta Qadeema (Member # 9889) on :
nope not quite
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
People we dont have to try hard, why dont we just keep this thread for ALL of MH's life, that way we dont have to trawl through lots of different threads to keep up, we could, sorry...I mean SHE could keep this going for the next 20 years!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
LOOK Missy, I can't make Oreo cakes here, you think I have oreo cookies in this place??? I'll have to buy you something, this thing is going to flip to 30 any second. Posted by Shanta Qadeema (Member # 9889) on :
Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
yeeeeeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh takes a breath... hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh god am so sad... hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... help av got repetative stress ..hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8: <Momen, with all the other heart broken boyfriends>
You forgot the "wonderful" MH adjective to former boyfriends.
...and the mother in law (another angel) that 'loves her like a daughter'. Although in her defense this one just asked her to LOVE her like her own daughter. Weird isn't it, when it's ok to love the mother in law but not the son? Duh~
Posted by Shanta Qadeema (Member # 9889) on :
Me too
quote:Originally posted by manx: yeeeeeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh takes a breath... hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh god am so sad... hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... help av got repetative stress ..hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
llllllllllllllllaa llllllllllllllllllllllllll lllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
Posted by Shanta Qadeema (Member # 9889) on :
come on pages - you can't be this long
I just want a nice big cream cake with extra cream
By the way I am FTPing a shed load of files incase anyone thinks I am SO extremely sad I really haven't got anything better to do Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
mmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
still aint made page 30 damn this is draggin on and on!!!
Posted by Alchemist Cake Girl (Member # 12318) on :
OMG, Hello, is this thing on?
HELLO?
Posted by Shanta Qadeema (Member # 9889) on :
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Shanta Qadeema: [qb] [QUOTE]Originally posted by Shanta Qadeema: [qb] surely now.....
I hate flood protection
I still hate flood protection . .
Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
errrrrrrr yep we did
Posted by Shanta Qadeema (Member # 9889) on :
quote:Originally posted by manx: mmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
We have a winner!!!!!!!!!
Manx,please step forward as the one responsible for hitting the number 30 page!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
thanks tina ! you can all fight over the cake as i don't eat sweets! you can each send me a kiss instead Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by manx: thanks tina ! you can all fight over the cake as i don't eat sweets! you can each send me a kiss instead
xoxoxoxoxo x's and o's for me!!! im savin the wet ones for walid lol
Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
ha ha oh tina cheers , but i was joshing with you all
Posted by Alchemist Cake Girl (Member # 12318) on :
*Alchemist steps up, takes the mic*
Really, it was a team effort to get this far, everyone deserves a piece of this wonderful cake, unfortunately you will not get that because it is MINE ALL MINE. AHAHAHAHAHUHAHAHAH!!!!!!
Smucky that is a likely story about the oreos, but I'm not buying it.
Who says that dreams can't come true on ES? Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
First, why would such a wonderful practicing covering, praying, and fasting Muslimah allow her daughter to be galloping around with boyfriends?
My daughter doesnt gallop around with anyone. Her boyfriend comes over to our house, they are not allowed to be alone at any point. She is not allowed to go out places with him, unless her father or myself take them and stay with them.
Thank you Tina, and I never said i was cute, i am average, not bad but not great either.. and by the way YoungEgyptianGuy, have you bothered to ask about your newborn son yet? I imagine not low life you are, he is adorable i must say, definitely must have taken after his mothers side of the family cause you are just dreadful to look at. Good to see you finally backed off of her as well as she still has the picts of your....... well.. that she is just waiting to post everywhere instead of only to your blog if you mess with her again. You are just pissy cause i sided with her over you. Momens mother did accept me, she didnt demand he stay, she expressed that she didnt want him to leave, she left the choice to him, she wanted me to come live there, but of course i couldnt do that. The rest doesnt matter.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
*all showered and dressed in posh frock for party*
Mabruk Manx Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: *all showered and dressed in posh frock for party*
Mabruk Manx
Since you're coming fresh from outside the board,Ayisha,did you bring along something to drink? Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:First, why would such a wonderful practicing covering, praying, and fasting Muslimah allow her daughter to be galloping around with boyfriends?
My daughter doesnt gallop around with anyone. Her boyfriend comes over to our house, they are not allowed to be alone at any point. She is not allowed to go out places with him, unless her father or myself take them and stay with them.
So she gallops supervised with her boyfriend? Ok then Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: First, why would such a wonderful practicing covering, praying, and fasting Muslimah allow her daughter to be galloping around with boyfriends?
My daughter doesnt gallop around with anyone. Her boyfriend comes over to our house, they are not allowed to be alone at any point. She is not allowed to go out places with him, unless her father or myself take them and stay with them.
Thank you Tina, and I never said i was cute, i am average, not bad but not great either.. and by the way YoungEgyptianGuy, have you bothered to ask about your newborn son yet? I imagine not low life you are, he is adorable i must say, definitely must have taken after his mothers side of the family cause you are just dreadful to look at. Good to see you finally backed off of her as well as she still has the picts of your....... well.. that she is just waiting to post everywhere instead of only to your blog if you mess with her again. You are just pissy cause i sided with her over you. Momens mother did accept me, she didnt demand he stay, she expressed that she didnt want him to leave, she left the choice to him, she wanted me to come live there, but of course i couldnt do that. The rest doesnt matter.
Mystic...I'm truly amazed that you continue to post here; that you actually formulate responses and continue this madness...haven't you had enough yet??
Why do you constantly defend yourself and your actions when you MUST know that most people are against what you do and say?
I really don't know how you do it. Amazing Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: First, why would such a wonderful practicing covering, praying, and fasting Muslimah allow her daughter to be galloping around with boyfriends?
My daughter doesnt gallop around with anyone. Her boyfriend comes over to our house, they are not allowed to be alone at any point. She is not allowed to go out places with him, unless her father or myself take them and stay with them.
Thank you Tina, and I never said i was cute, i am average, not bad but not great either.. and by the way YoungEgyptianGuy, have you bothered to ask about your newborn son yet? I imagine not low life you are, he is adorable i must say, definitely must have taken after his mothers side of the family cause you are just dreadful to look at. Good to see you finally backed off of her as well as she still has the picts of your....... well.. that she is just waiting to post everywhere instead of only to your blog if you mess with her again. You are just pissy cause i sided with her over you. Momens mother did accept me, she didnt demand he stay, she expressed that she didnt want him to leave, she left the choice to him, she wanted me to come live there, but of course i couldnt do that. The rest doesnt matter.
MH,
I was just wondering, how did your children react to your conversion? I'm assuming they didn't convert, right? It must be difficult for you and for them.
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: My daughter doesnt gallop around with anyone. Her boyfriend comes over to our house, they are not allowed to be alone at any point. She is not allowed to go out places with him, unless her father or myself take them and stay with them.
Except, of course, when you're off galloping around the country with your new, er, boyfriend.
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Alchemist Cake Girl: Smucky that is a likely story about the oreos, but I'm not buying it.
Oh you just now figured out Smuckers can't be trusted with the sweets? If you turn your head for one second she'll have it behind her back and - zoom! - out the door.
Posted by Pothead_Barbie (Member # 15091) on :
quote:Originally posted by tina kamal:
quote:Originally posted by YoungEgyptianGuy: Tina, i am so worried that this man might be you! seems you are having an affair with MH! come clean woman just say what's between the two of you! you are always supporting her whether she is right or wrong, but she was never right so you always support her even when she is wrong! isnt that weird!! i bet there is something going on between the two of you!
u might be a fag!! but i aint a lesbo!! i support her cas its not my place to say shes wrong!! she is a grown woman she will do what she wants wethere is say its good or bad!! so as a friend ya i will support her!! thats what friends do!!! hes a real man not fake i have seen the pic! but the next time u feel froggy callin me a lesbon in a round about way!! check ur own shi t yr the fag! ur egyptian and maybne u try to hide it cas u dont wanna go to jail!!!! come to usa they are all out of the closet here!!! u can find yrself a white or black american boyfriend!!!!
i did a girl b4....in fact, i did a girl b4 i even did a man. it was so soft and nice and femmy and there was no beard stubble giving me brushburns all over my face and neck like i get with them hairy egyptian guys. (thats a big problem i have with them men). it was nice, but aint my cup of tea....
Posted by Pothead_Barbie (Member # 15091) on :
quote:Originally posted by justvisiting:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: My daughter doesnt gallop around with anyone. Her boyfriend comes over to our house, they are not allowed to be alone at any point. She is not allowed to go out places with him, unless her father or myself take them and stay with them.
Except, of course, when you're off galloping around the country with your new, er, boyfriend.
oh come on now, how in the hell would anyone know that? you got satelite that zooms down on anyone u wanna spy on? ur funny!
ew how about i got in trouble today for cussin out the HR director? loooooooool! well i didnt really cuss her out but i definetly told her how i felt. some people make stupid reasons for doing things and i lay things out as they are. ilchk, uptight white folk SUCK!
Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: First, why would such a wonderful practicing covering, praying, and fasting Muslimah allow her daughter to be galloping around with boyfriends?
My daughter doesnt gallop around with anyone. Her boyfriend comes over to our house, they are not allowed to be alone at any point. She is not allowed to go out places with him, unless her father or myself take them and stay with them.
Thank you Tina, and I never said i was cute, i am average, not bad but not great either.. and by the way YoungEgyptianGuy, have you bothered to ask about your newborn son yet? I imagine not low life you are, he is adorable i must say, definitely must have taken after his mothers side of the family cause you are just dreadful to look at. Good to see you finally backed off of her as well as she still has the picts of your....... well.. that she is just waiting to post everywhere instead of only to your blog if you mess with her again. You are just pissy cause i sided with her over you. Momens mother did accept me, she didnt demand he stay, she expressed that she didnt want him to leave, she left the choice to him, she wanted me to come live there, but of course i couldnt do that. The rest doesnt matter.
Ahhaaahahaaaaa!!!! OF COURSE she starts posting and replying by feeding little scraps that will warrant responses from others....You guys took the focus OFF Mystic. Shame, shame.
Hey let's go to 35 and really piss her off by ignoring her posts. ;-)
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by hibbah:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: First, why would such a wonderful practicing covering, praying, and fasting Muslimah allow her daughter to be galloping around with boyfriends?
My daughter doesnt gallop around with anyone. Her boyfriend comes over to our house, they are not allowed to be alone at any point. She is not allowed to go out places with him, unless her father or myself take them and stay with them.
Thank you Tina, and I never said i was cute, i am average, not bad but not great either.. and by the way YoungEgyptianGuy, have you bothered to ask about your newborn son yet? I imagine not low life you are, he is adorable i must say, definitely must have taken after his mothers side of the family cause you are just dreadful to look at. Good to see you finally backed off of her as well as she still has the picts of your....... well.. that she is just waiting to post everywhere instead of only to your blog if you mess with her again. You are just pissy cause i sided with her over you. Momens mother did accept me, she didnt demand he stay, she expressed that she didnt want him to leave, she left the choice to him, she wanted me to come live there, but of course i couldnt do that. The rest doesnt matter.
MH,
I was just wondering, how did your children react to your conversion? I'm assuming they didn't convert, right? It must be difficult for you and for them.
My children accepted my conversion very easily. They knew i was studying it for a long time and any questions they came with i did my best to answer about it. They did not revert no, however the youngest has a strong interest in it and has taken time to learn the prayers in arabic. She is working on the eating halal thing, its easy for her here in my home but at her fathers its a different story as he doesnt believe what you eat or how you dress has anythign to do with anything, doesnt believe in church either. Its not difficult at all for me or them. I allow them to celebrate their holidays and they respect my fasting times and beliefs as well.
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
your children sound quite mature
Posted by hibbah (Member # 12156) on :
yeah, they do sound mature.
It makes sense that the youngest one would want to imitate her mom.
So do MH, do you still bring Ham or Pepperoni in the house? (im just curious as to how such a family dynamic would work)
Posted by cbrbddd (Member # 3891) on :
I can't believe you sick people are hanging around long enough to get this to 30 pages!!!! Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
I dont bring pork ham or pepperoni in the home. I do buy turkey ham and beef pepperoni or turkey pepperoni, also one of their favorites was sausage gravy and biscuits so we have opted for turkey sausage, which with a little extra sage added is pretty much the same taste. The only time pork enters my house is if they wish to order pizza from outside instead of making it at home. They order what they like on theirs and i order a seperate one usually veggie or all cheese for myself. They are very considerate of how i eat, hehe they often come from their fathers and stop by a gas station for pizza and will bring me some cheese pizza or cheese stuffed breadsticks so that they arent leaving me out of it. Sweet babies. Luckily their father doesnt give me trouble over it either, he often has cookouts on his grill for family and will invite me and tell me if i will bring any halal meat over he will be happy to fix it for me so that i can be included in their gathering, i always refuse but its nice of him to show the support anyway
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I've never met a serious convert who had young children who didn't try to bring their children up as Muslims. Older children I might understand, but even then for a girl to have a boyfriend is highly unusual...especially for someone who has been studying Islam for so many years~ that would have made the girl around, what, 10 years old when you were first interested? Whatever, they're your kids but it makes no sense to me personally.
ExptinCAI you were correct, life of the party was put in the corner. Nobody puts baby in the corner. Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by ExptinCAI:
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart: First, why would such a wonderful practicing covering, praying, and fasting Muslimah allow her daughter to be galloping around with boyfriends?
My daughter doesnt gallop around with anyone. Her boyfriend comes over to our house, they are not allowed to be alone at any point. She is not allowed to go out places with him, unless her father or myself take them and stay with them.
Thank you Tina, and I never said i was cute, i am average, not bad but not great either.. and by the way YoungEgyptianGuy, have you bothered to ask about your newborn son yet? I imagine not low life you are, he is adorable i must say, definitely must have taken after his mothers side of the family cause you are just dreadful to look at. Good to see you finally backed off of her as well as she still has the picts of your....... well.. that she is just waiting to post everywhere instead of only to your blog if you mess with her again. You are just pissy cause i sided with her over you. Momens mother did accept me, she didnt demand he stay, she expressed that she didnt want him to leave, she left the choice to him, she wanted me to come live there, but of course i couldnt do that. The rest doesnt matter.
Ahhaaahahaaaaa!!!! OF COURSE she starts posting and replying by feeding little scraps that will warrant responses from others....You guys took the focus OFF Mystic. Shame, shame.
Hey let's go to 35 and really piss her off by ignoring her posts. ;-)
Mystic who?
Dont worry she cheered up when she was able to talk about herself some more, because they are all such a happy well adjusted cheese crust eating family. It must be all those multi cultural experiences they are having.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
*makes breakfast for everyone*
*fresh coffee all round*
*fresh squeezed orange juice*
Hey guys, do you think I could make a business out of feeding the mystic masses??
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
I'm sure you could, look over there, more are arriving. Wouldn't mind some blankets though I have been here all night. Where is she? is she backstage? when's she coming on stage? Rumour has it there might be some guest appearances today, hope you've got enough for lunch too Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
((takes coffee from Ayisha, declines the OJ)) 'Morning Ayisha, Mrs., ready for Round II?'
BTW, pizza crust-eating..lol Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
Morning Smuckers, where did you get to last night? (hands her night vision specs), absolutely round II, I am sure I saw Steven Speilburg somewhere...look there he is!
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
ahh morning smucky, could you take over prep for lunch while I go to the passport office? I discovered im an illegal immigrant If im gone a long while will someone bail me out, or at least bring me food Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Was cuddling the baby before she slept again, she took more steps last night, she's up to 6 at a time now. Father in law dropped by, had to ignore the happenings.
Steven Speilburg!?? I wonder if he would do a story about this thread....Mysticheart and the Raiders of the Lost Cause... Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by cbrbddd: I can't believe you sick people are hanging around long enough to get this to 30 pages!!!!
LOL!! Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
ooh thats on MBC2 on Saturday Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: Mysticheart and the Raiders of the Lost Cause...
Don't worry Ayisha, some of Mystic's Ex's are coming to your rescue because they heard you were a nice practicing, covering, fasting, good mother, beautiful muslimah (and all your friends say how lucky you are to have your stunningly attractive husband). (did I miss anything out?)
Darn it I have to get ready for work life is so unfair for me, I have it so hard I dont know where I got this silly notion of earning some money!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: ahh morning smucky, could you take over prep for lunch while I go to the passport office? I discovered im an illegal immigrant If im gone a long while will someone bail me out, or at least bring me food
Ayisha, don't worry if your status goes illegal you can always marry to become legal in trade for supporting a man financially saddled with 3 kids for the rest of your life (oh yea the man is super needy, too). What a deal, eah!?? ((eyebrows going up and down).
((substitutes lunch for pie))
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by Tigerlily:
quote:Originally posted by cbrbddd: I can't believe you sick people are hanging around long enough to get this to 30 pages!!!!
LOL!!
Yeah just think, we could be trawling through fascist newspaper articles instead Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Aww comeon, TL didn't mean anything by it. Besides, I think we've already established it is galloping and not trawling. Oh wait, that was someone else ~!
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.: Yeah just think, we could be trawling through fascist newspaper articles instead
How about some Playboy mags for you?? Get back in the bed and stand up again but this time with the right foot. Good luck and good morning!! Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I don't get it? Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I don't get it?
This whole thread?? Me neither. Posted by Penny (Member # 1925) on :
^^^ LOL sorry they do nothing for me... Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: ahh morning smucky, could you take over prep for lunch while I go to the passport office? I discovered im an illegal immigrant If im gone a long while will someone bail me out, or at least bring me food
So Aishya , what's the going rate for illegal expats to get GreenCard Egypt?? 2 cows, a camel and a bucket of koshary???
(Rumi furiously counting her pennies, checking livestock.com and getting her biggest pot ready )
Posted by Rumicrazieluv (Member # 12053) on :
Btw, Where IS Vicky?? She should be part of this thread right now, Im kinda surprised she hasn't come to give mystic her "advice" ??
Poor Momen is in need of some "rebound luvvin". After all,losing the most beautiful, well deserving convert(oh yeah forgot devout and covering) who's kindness is world known and admired throughout the land must be heartbreaking. Vicky always said she had what Momen really needs Posted by tootsie (Member # 13946) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: *makes breakfast for everyone*
*fresh coffee all round*
*fresh squeezed orange juice*
Hey guys, do you think I could make a business out of feeding the mystic masses??
Thanks for the coffee Ayisha- Did you bring any sweet and low with you ?
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Rumicrazieluv: Btw, Where IS Vicky?? She should be part of this thread right now, Im kinda surprised she hasn't come to give mystic her "advice" ??
Poor Momen is in need of some "rebound luvvin". After all,losing the most beautiful, well deserving convert(oh yeah forgot devout and covering) who's kindness is world known and admired throughout the land must be heartbreaking. Vicky always said she had what Momen really needs
Perhaps Vicky was the other woman all along?
(page 31!!)
Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
we should name this soap opera...
the old and the breastless ten husbands to marry (and divorce) muslims of our past (and future) general stupidity the road to indonesia
any other suggestions?
Posted by DawnBev08 (Member # 14964) on :
Posted by Tigerlily (Member # 3567) on :
quote:Originally posted by walkingathinline: the road to indonesia
Lol or even better 'the mystic ways to Lombok'!! Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
the mystic ways to lombok and back!
(you know there's going to be a follow up saga with the evil lombokian who just pretended to be a good muslim)
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by walkingathinline: we should name this soap opera...
the old and the breastless ten husbands to marry (and divorce) muslims of our past (and future) general stupidity the road to indonesia
any other suggestions?
You mean the sold and the sexless. Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
there you go! i like it smucks!
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
As the girl earns... (as the world turns)
Posted by Shahrazat (Member # 12769) on :
Better not to mock at this subject that much as most of us have daughters.
We cannot know what future will bring for us and I always believe that God never lets you die before making you live what you criticized Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Which subject? Posted by Shahrazat (Member # 12769) on :
MH subject Smuckers... Doesnt it get more cruel?
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Cruel is what she is doing to her kids, this is a message board, it's different. On that subject.... The sold and the dutiful... (the bold and the beautiful)
Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
quote:Originally posted by Shahrazat: MH subject Smuckers... Doesnt it get more cruel?
Shahrazat, what would normal people do? Ok, now what does Mystic do? She posts more personal details about her life - EVEN when NO ONE is asking for them! She loves the cruel comments best because this allows her to play the poor victim.
Posted by Shahrazat (Member # 12769) on :
They are her kids. I don't think they feel uncomfortable with their mother.
Yes, this is a message board sure, all of us said what we think about her life as she lets us by updating her situation everyday.
But the thing I m objecting is it s not a good thing to make fun of it.
MH may be wrong of course but I think her being calm and tolerant to all these comments made us to talk about her more brave. If she was like someone Josette, I mean using too many bad words for the ones criticizing her, I dont think we could be like that... Yes, maybe as Exp.Cai said, she likes cruel comments, I don't know..
Anyhow this is what I think...
Posted by ExptinCAI (Member # 1439) on :
Expect a personal message and an outpouring of thanks from the poor victim, Shahrazat. She'll point out how you both have such kind, open hearts...not like the rest of us who tried to actually empower her with practical, useful advice.
Posted by Shahrazat (Member # 12769) on :
I m not expecting anything personal (including PMs) from her and I don't know her personally ExptinCai.
I never objected your useful advices. There were too many good things written here.
Posted by Cosmogirl (Member # 8748) on :
Hold up, I am CERTAIN those kids get uncomfortable around their mother. I have a story that is FAR less intriguing than MH, and I have always been able to provide a good life for them, and while one is now 27 and living in SF, the other is now about to turn 18 and he is most assuredly ALWAYS uncomfortable if I'm around. The baby.. well he doesn't mind me so much, but now we are at a point with the other 2 where K and I serve as a constant source of embarassment. And we love it. It means we did our jobs right and they see us as PARENTS and not buddies. Don't get me wrong, they looove us when they need money or we are all out for dinner, but otherwise? We get eyerolls and groans.
SO just to keep this going... MH your husband invites his whole family over for barbeques? AT YOUR HOUSE? And he invites his freakshow hijabi wife to come out and bring her special food, and you resist? I wonder how well your reversion went with the redneck pack you ran with. And with all hsi cancers.. he is up and hosting parties? Is he playing you? ANd I can not believe you don't rush right over to hsi trailer and show of what a pious and religious woman you have become. It really is the only jewel in your chest anymore, and you flash it all over the internet to other men to recieve their grateful praise, doesnt' your hubby hold you to the light anymore?
How on earth were you expectign Momen to come live with your Ex in the yard? I still can't quite get that. Have you ever met a real man? One who doesn't put up with this manipulative bs? A real man would see what you are selling and stop short. Because if you can sell it today, you've sold it once or twice before.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by cbrbddd: I can't believe you sick people are hanging around long enough to get this to 30 pages!!!!
Errrr....by the way,what you doin here,gal???
*waves at cbrbddd*
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by Mrs.: I'm sure you could, look over there, more are arriving. Wouldn't mind some blankets though I have been here all night. Where is she? is she backstage? when's she coming on stage? Rumour has it there might be some guest appearances today, hope you've got enough for lunch too
Yup...saw you camped here last night,Mrs.Like waiting in line for ticket for a massive rock concert! Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
I just want to say that I have a problem with someone telling me that God is going to make mine or anyone else's daughter come out bad because of something we say. That's first. Girl's come out bad because of upbringing and experiences. I do believe in the divine plan to an extent and while I would never wish anything bad on anybody I also believe that we all make our paths in life and a little bit of that path is created by our choices and our decisions...not just by fate.
With that being said, there was something I said a few days ago that I will say again. The minute you begin to compromise your thoughts or what you believe (especially as it relates to Mysticheart and her decisions with her life as it pertains to her children) you become subject for mediocrity.
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
I guess momen has done the right thing by leaving MH.
This thread showed how unstable this woman is! She has totally lost lost her mind!
We all feel so sorry for her:(
Lets end this boring thread. I don't care even if she woke up tomorrow and told us three ghosts were flirting with her and wanted to marry her but she is trying to chose the best ghost out of them! one who can secure her financially in HELL!
GO get married, WE DO NOT CARE!
I am starting to forget what was this forum all about! Isn't it EgyptSearch.com!
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
Smuckers, how can you not love that logic????!!!!
Oh man. I am so IN!
Has anyone seen my new neighbor? She has the most horrid legs. They must be gaaaaawd as long as the Mississippi and she sure got short-changed in the butt department didn't she that thing can't be more than 6" wide.
You know the lottery is such a scam nobody ever wins and if I ever did win I wouldn't buy a nice house and cars and velvet Elvis paintings like other people do because they don't know how to spend money or invest money or save money and I think everybody who plays the lottery is just trailer trash to begin with.
I wish someone told me how this works a long time ago! All we have to do is express our disdain and *poof!* it's our new life and lifestyle!
Posted by Shahrazat (Member # 12769) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I just want to say that I have a problem with someone telling me that God is going to make mine or anyone else's daughter come out bad because of something we say. That's first. Girl's come out bad because of upbringing and experiences. I do believe in the divine plan to an extent and while I would never wish anything bad on anybody I also believe that we all make our paths in life and a little bit of that path is created by our choices and our decisions...not just by fate.
With that being said, there was something I said a few days ago that I will say again. The minute you begin to compromise your thoughts or what you believe (especially as it relates to Mysticheart and her decisions with her life as it pertains to her children) you become subject for mediocrity.
Smuckers, first I didn't say anything directly to you. If there is a misunderstanding, sorry for that.
A few days ago, I heard somebody said 'God watches us with a smile on his face while we are busy for making plans about our lives' What life taught me is that my fate is the main character in my life.
For MH, do we know all the details about her childhood or teenager period? Do we know the games that her fate played and what makes her sense that much unstable and what makes her that much bold about deciding things? No....
And.... You accept it or not but in our society we believe that, this world has its own justice. If we make a mistake, the judgement is here first.
Please re-read the above things and accept that some people are really mocking at her situation. For me, it s like mocking at a disabled person.
And... You are native speakers and this makes you expressing things easier for you. It s a little bit more difficult for me to express what I really feel and what I really want to tell..
Posted by justvisiting (Member # 14989) on :
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: Because if you can sell it today, you've sold it once or twice before.
I bet the folks at Immigration say the exact same thing from time to time.
And, for the record (and before MH gets any more bright ideas), there isn't a Visa Whore (no offense people, that's what they're called) that would pay $20,000 for the pleasure of spending two or three years living with and financially supporting a good, covering, praying, fasting, putting out kind of woman who has three kids, a home-schooled GED/diploma, no apparant career aspirations, particularly one who's ex-husband lives in the yard - especially not when $10,000 will buy them a virgin.
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I don't get it?
Tigerlilly has discovered my playboy fetish
Posted by mysticheart (Member # 6838) on :
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: Hold up, I am CERTAIN those kids get uncomfortable around their mother. I have a story that is FAR less intriguing than MH, and I have always been able to provide a good life for them, and while one is now 27 and living in SF, the other is now about to turn 18 and he is most assuredly ALWAYS uncomfortable if I'm around. The baby.. well he doesn't mind me so much, but now we are at a point with the other 2 where K and I serve as a constant source of embarassment. And we love it. It means we did our jobs right and they see us as PARENTS and not buddies. Don't get me wrong, they looove us when they need money or we are all out for dinner, but otherwise? We get eyerolls and groans.
SO just to keep this going... MH your husband invites his whole family over for barbeques? AT YOUR HOUSE? And he invites his freakshow hijabi wife to come out and bring her special food, and you resist? I wonder how well your reversion went with the redneck pack you ran with. And with all hsi cancers.. he is up and hosting parties? Is he playing you? ANd I can not believe you don't rush right over to hsi trailer and show of what a pious and religious woman you have become. It really is the only jewel in your chest anymore, and you flash it all over the internet to other men to recieve their grateful praise, doesnt' your hubby hold you to the light anymore?
How on earth were you expectign Momen to come live with your Ex in the yard? I still can't quite get that. Have you ever met a real man? One who doesn't put up with this manipulative bs? A real man would see what you are selling and stop short. Because if you can sell it today, you've sold it once or twice before.
The ex husband moved long ago, thankfully. As for my children reverting, that is their choice. I give them information as they ask for it and they often come and sit and watch me do prayers, the youngest joins in prayers quite alot but i will not push them into it, no one pushed me, they have the right to decide for themselves. My older daughter does have a boyfriend yes, but they are always supervised and do nothing more than hold hands and talk.. there is nothing wrong in this for her, she isnt muslim and she isnt doing anything inappropriate.
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
finally I am legal again!!!
Now why didnt anyone bring me food?? I had to marry 2 security police, 3 secret police, but I didnt meet them as it was secret so I was blindfolded, and 4 traffic police to get my visa and get out I was given 50 piastres to get the bus though, should have been 25 but it went up today to double!!!
Posted by Mrs. (Member # 14656) on :
quote:Originally posted by Shahrazat:
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I just want to say that I have a problem with someone telling me that God is going to make mine or anyone else's daughter come out bad because of something we say. That's first. Girl's come out bad because of upbringing and experiences. I do believe in the divine plan to an extent and while I would never wish anything bad on anybody I also believe that we all make our paths in life and a little bit of that path is created by our choices and our decisions...not just by fate.
With that being said, there was something I said a few days ago that I will say again. The minute you begin to compromise your thoughts or what you believe (especially as it relates to Mysticheart and her decisions with her life as it pertains to her children) you become subject for mediocrity.
Smuckers, first I didn't say anything directly to you. If there is a misunderstanding, sorry for that.
A few days ago, I heard somebody said 'God watches us with a smile on his face while we are busy for making plans about our lives' What life taught me is that my fate is the main character in my life.
For MH, do we know all the details about her childhood or teenager period? Do we know the games that her fate played and what makes her sense that much unstable and what makes her that much bold about deciding things? No....
And.... You accept it or not but in our society we believe that, this world has its own justice. If we make a mistake, the judgement is here first.
Please re-read the above things and accept that some people are really mocking at her situation. For me, it s like mocking at a disabled person.
And... You are native speakers and this makes you expressing things easier for you. It s a little bit more difficult for me to express what I really feel and what I really want to tell..
You are right it is mocking, thats because there is nothing left to do but laugh at laughable situations. In all honesty, I know its not nice, but I cant help it, I'm fed up being treated like an idiot, the woman knows what she's doing, she's the one REALLY taking the piss.
Posted by Alchemist Cake Girl (Member # 12318) on :
People, please repeat along with me.
"I will no longer reply to this post. This is 3 minutes of my life that I will not get back. Instead I will talk about cake or possibly Harry Potter. Amen"
Posted by YoungEgyptianGuy (Member # 15064) on :
I will no longer reply to this boring post coming from A boring creature! These are 3 wasted minutes of my life that I will not get back and i will never do the same mistake again. Instead I will talk about roz belaban or possibly Ninja turtles. Amen
Try to add to this post, be creative lol
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
we could talk koshary, thats what im eating now Posted by Alchemist Cake Girl (Member # 12318) on :
*snags ayisha's koshary, looks around for the coca cola*
Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
sends alchemist pepsi instead Posted by desertgirl (Member # 12450) on :
We can talk about anything we want now? Well, I painted my apartment today, all in white. I had been living in this apartment close to the beach for more than 10 years before we moved to our house last December. I am happy about the result. I want to paint one wall of the livingroom in a different colour but I have not decided which colour yet.
Posted by cloudberry (Member # 11163) on :
quote:Originally posted by Shahrazat: They are her kids. I don't think they feel uncomfortable with their mother.
Maybe not in this case but believe me, there ARE children who are embarrassed about how their parents behave. Some children are wiser than their parents and sometimes actually keep the family up and going - which is obviously too much responsibility for children.
(And with teenagers that seems to be a rule more than an exception -being embarrassed- even if the parents are normal )
Posted by Alchemist Cake Girl (Member # 12318) on :
*slaps down micky's pepsi*
GIMME MY COKE!!!!!!!!!!! Posted by miffmiss (Member # 14978) on :
Coke or pepsi which is it. lol
Posted by Pothead_Barbie (Member # 15091) on :
coke... in a bag
Posted by Ayisha (Member # 4713) on :
bebsi
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
Any of you care to bring a big jar of cold,refreshing karkade/hibiscus drink?
Posted by civil society (Member # 14880) on :
hibiscus drink? interesting. lol
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by civil society: hibiscus drink? interesting. lol
quote:Originally posted by Ayisha: finally I am legal again!!!
Now why didnt anyone bring me food?? I had to marry 2 security police, 3 secret police, but I didnt meet them as it was secret so I was blindfolded, and 4 traffic police to get my visa and get out I was given 50 piastres to get the bus though, should have been 25 but it went up today to double!!!
did the policemen say 'bosa bosa habiby' Posted by Pothead_Barbie (Member # 15091) on :
bleckh hibiscus tea tastes like sweet cold red water...but you see color so therefore you think it has flavor. they gave me that drink once and it made me sh*t like mad.
Posted by cbrbddd (Member # 3891) on :
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8:
quote:Originally posted by cbrbddd: I can't believe you sick people are hanging around long enough to get this to 30 pages!!!!
Errrr....by the way,what you doin here,gal???
*waves at cbrbddd*
LOL, doing my once a day check in!!! I needed something to look forward to, errrrrh, maybe that is to keep me awake in the mid-afternoon at work, lol Posted by MICKY A (Member # 11209) on :
bepsi Posted by olympus (Member # 10086) on :
quote:Originally posted by With a name like Smuckers: I just want to say that I have a problem with someone telling me that God is going to make mine or anyone else's daughter come out bad because of something we say. That's first. Girl's come out bad because of upbringing and experiences. I do believe in the divine plan to an extent and while I would never wish anything bad on anybody I also believe that we all make our paths in life and a little bit of that path is created by our choices and our decisions...not just by fate.
With that being said, there was something I said a few days ago that I will say again. The minute you begin to compromise your thoughts or what you believe (especially as it relates to Mysticheart and her decisions with her life as it pertains to her children) you become subject for mediocrity.
Posted by Sashyra8 (Member # 14488) on :
quote:Originally posted by cbrbddd:
quote:Originally posted by Sashyra8:
quote:Originally posted by cbrbddd: I can't believe you sick people are hanging around long enough to get this to 30 pages!!!!
Errrr....by the way,what you doin here,gal???
*waves at cbrbddd*
LOL, doing my once a day check in!!! I needed something to look forward to, errrrrh, maybe that is to keep me awake in the mid-afternoon at work, lol
Yup,sure once a day.....lolllllllllll! Posted by Vader (Member # 14189) on :
*performs violent spankings on everyone he sees with a coke, or standing next to someone with a coke*
*whips out his huge....pepsi bottle, hugs it, and drinks his sorrow away* Posted by tina kamal (Member # 13845) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vader: *performs violent spankings on everyone he sees with a coke, or standing next to someone with a coke*
*whips out his huge....pepsi bottle, hugs it, and drinks his sorrow away*
my sons says hurray cas he drinks pepsi i like sprite!! will u spank me too????
Posted by Alchemist Cake Girl (Member # 12318) on :
*bashes vader's head with her coke bottle and pours it down his throat*
(ha! page 32!) Posted by walkingathinline (Member # 11504) on :
*backs up Alchemist* (even tho i'm off the soda for 2 months now! if i go back, it's COKE all the way, baby!)
Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by mysticheart:
quote:Originally posted by Cosmogirl: Hold up, I am CERTAIN those kids get uncomfortable around their mother. I have a story that is FAR less intriguing than MH, and I have always been able to provide a good life for them, and while one is now 27 and living in SF, the other is now about to turn 18 and he is most assuredly ALWAYS uncomfortable if I'm around. The baby.. well he doesn't mind me so much, but now we are at a point with the other 2 where K and I serve as a constant source of embarassment. And we love it. It means we did our jobs right and they see us as PARENTS and not buddies. Don't get me wrong, they looove us when they need money or we are all out for dinner, but otherwise? We get eyerolls and groans.
SO just to keep this going... MH your husband invites his whole family over for barbeques? AT YOUR HOUSE? And he invites his freakshow hijabi wife to come out and bring her special food, and you resist? I wonder how well your reversion went with the redneck pack you ran with. And with all hsi cancers.. he is up and hosting parties? Is he playing you? ANd I can not believe you don't rush right over to hsi trailer and show of what a pious and religious woman you have become. It really is the only jewel in your chest anymore, and you flash it all over the internet to other men to recieve their grateful praise, doesnt' your hubby hold you to the light anymore?
How on earth were you expectign Momen to come live with your Ex in the yard? I still can't quite get that. Have you ever met a real man? One who doesn't put up with this manipulative bs? A real man would see what you are selling and stop short. Because if you can sell it today, you've sold it once or twice before.
there is nothing wrong in this for her, she isnt muslim and she isnt doing anything inappropriate.
Yea, you keep thinking that. Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
quote:Originally posted by Alchemist Cake Girl: *bashes vader's head with her coke bottle and pours it down his throat*
(ha! page 32!)
Sorry Alchemist, you didn't get to page 33, I guess that means no cake. Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
hey... i got the cake on pg 30 u mean to tell me i ain't special??? boo hoo Posted by manx (Member # 14517) on :
am goin to bed.. sulkin now !! Posted by Makbeta (Member # 14401) on :
32 pages???!!! Posted by With a name like Smuckers (Member # 10289) on :
Oh yea Makbeta, you missed a lot, although I must admit most of the pages acquired were people trying to get it to be MORE pages so Alchemist could get some cake...she's got such a sweet tooth.
![[Frown]](frown.gif)
I'm so sorry to hear this MH. ![[Confused]](confused.gif)
Just remember things always happen for a reason, hang in there and keep your chin up! ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
. It is just an advice, ok? Take care of yourself.
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
![[Mad]](mad.gif)
![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
![[Cool]](cool.gif)
![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
![[Embarrassed]](redface.gif)